I know that I recently wrote a blog post all about Intuition vs Logic and I have since enjoyed some lengthy and interesting discussion with friends around that topic; and this is because there seems to be some misunderstanding around the difference between intuition and instinct, and which of those we should be listening to. In my previous post I said that you should be careful of always choosing to go with your intuition over your logic and I cited some pretty valid reasons for that, but when it comes to listening to your instincts it's a whole other ball game because overriding your instincts can be much, much harder indeed. 
Your intuition is that feeling that you get, almost like an inner voice or sixth sense that makes you think that something may feel like a good or bad opportunity. Your instinct however is not a feeling, it's an innate hardwired natural tendency to behave or react in a certain way and it's far more primordial than your intuition. Your instinct is part of your biological make up which is why it can be very difficult to override. Unlike your intuitive thoughts which are created when your brain perceives a neural pathway, your instincts are a motor response that are initiated by your whole body in response to an external stimuli. 
Our instincts are what have kept us alive as human beings for thousands of years, they are produced by a biological force that makes us react to hunger and thirst, it's what drives us to use our bowels, blink, sleep, have sex, reproduce and above all else - survive. Over time we have managed to hone our instincts so that we can manage them in more refined and appropriate ways, but all of us still have them and not all of us have evolved to a point where we can manage or control them very well.
Suppressing your most basic instincts can not only be useful but also completely necessary if you want to get along in the modern world. It would be completely inappropriate to jump every person's bones that aroused a sexual instinct within you, and although there probably was a time in history when this was a useful instinct to employ in order to sustain human kind, these days it would obviously be extremely frowned upon and you'd probably end up in jail. Also managing other social/emotional instincts like our instinct of fight or flight, which may not always be an appropriate response in every situation has been replaced with more refined methods of negotiation and modern logic now, so there is no need for anyone to run screaming out of a room when they feel affronted or afraid anymore. 
However, those fight or flight instincts can still come in mighty handy when it comes to certain survival situations and there are hundreds of human experiences that we would still be using the method with, and it would be saving our skin to do so.  In general, ignoring all of your instincts is pretty unwise because our instincts are important innate behaviours that we learned and practised for a reason - as humans we all need them, but some of our human instincts that we have developed over time are not only useless now but they could even cause the eventual the downfall of humankind if we can't fight against them.
Our strongest human instinct, the one that overrides everything is our survival instinct. Because of this super strong survival instinct that all humans have, we have also developed a few less than attractive instincts in order to keep the flock safe and humans alive. The worst of those are denial, revenge and greed. Due to the extreme scarcity of resources for early man, greed was a form of survival. Being honesty also didn't feed anyone and neither did forgiveness, so denial and revenge were ways to establish pecking order, strengthen loyalties and ensure that a tribe survived. Unfortunately, many of us are still employing these shithouse instincts into our lives today and the results have been damning to say the least. Many people are still instinctively in denial about many modern issues like food shortages, lack of clean drinking water, global warming, pollution, disease, overpopulation... the list goes on and on and the reason for this denial is often fed by greed and revenge. And even though we do not need to employ these basic instincts to protect the herd anymore, many of us still do and the results are devastating on a global scale. 
So, in short it is fair to say that we should, just like our intuition, listen to our logic and sound modern thinking before we allow ourselves to be overcome by our often outdated biological instincts. We as humans pride ourselves in being the leaders of this planet, and in doing so we have an obligation to behaviour in a more refined and dignified manner than some of our instincts would like us to because if we don't, then we are really no better than the animals that we say we are going to protect. Don't be a slave to your instincts, use them when you need to but be aware that some of them are totally archaic knee jerk reactions that you can learn to control and replace with more evolved and humanitarian choices. 

You don't need to have religious calling, become a devout Buddhist monk or start drinking the Kool Aid with a local cult to feel like you are tapping into a higher power. In fact, your true higher power really doesn't necessarily have to have anything to do with religion or any organised belief systems because tapping into your higher power is really just about finding out about what motivates, stimulates, activates and energises your life; and that is going to look different for everyone. 
So many people attribute the term 'higher power' to a power that is greater than ourselves and I respectfully say to them that I strongly disagree. From my experience, this is most certainly not the case for everyone. Many, many people are able to tap into a higher vibration or version of themselves without having any firm or fixed ideas around an existential God or deity. And I firmly believe that it is just as correct to call this inner attunement 'tapping into a higher power' and that is the kind of higher power that I am going to be discussing today - your internal higher power; but if it makes you feel more comfortable to look outside of yourself for that then by all means, go for it!
In order to become more attuned to your higher self, you do need to be willing to go within. This may take the form of meditation, contemplation or for religious people - prayer, whatever you're doing, you need to quiet the mind, still the body and calm the inner voices so that you get beneath all of the hum and noise that you are so used to hearing all of the time. You're looking for a deep dive into the seat of yourself because what you are attempting to do is connect with the deepest parts of your subconscious and really listen to the most raw parts of yourself. This voice, the one that lies deep within you, is your higher power.
But why bother trying to tap into this 'higher power' anyway? It all just sounds like a lot of sitting around and zoning out right? Well, in all honesty, when you do manage to find that voice that I spoke of earlier, it will help you to understand yourself a whole lot better. It will help you to heal old hurts, open your mind, help yourself and others and teach you to be more loving and accepting of differences and mistakes. Becoming more attuned to yourself will allow you to identify patterns in your behaviours, root out problems in your life and best of all solve them as well. And just to really put the icing on the cake, your higher power will also help you to love yourself unconditionally. 
I know that some people will think that this is all just spiritual mumbo-jumbo, but it really isn't. You do not need to be spiritual or believe in any kind of God to be able to attune to your own rhythms and subconscious energies. If everyone spent more time tending their own gardens and less time worrying about what was going on in anyone else's, trust me - it would be a much brighter and calmer world overall. So don't look elsewhere, I say look within to unlock, unfurl and understand who you really are. Everyone deserves a higher love and a link to their higher self but knowing that you don't have to go outside of yourself to get that is really one of the most empowering things that anyone could know. 
Get started right away, learn to listen to your body, tune into your feelings and pay attention to your thoughts. Attune to your higher power and start to love yourself on a whole new and more deeply empowering level. You truly deserve nothing less than that and I honestly do believe that. 
The COVID -19 pandemic has made it absolutely impossible for anyone to travel anywhere for quite some time, so why not invest some time in a little inner travel? What have you got to lose? And it is completely free!
​I do encourage and sincerely wish you well on your explorations to find your higher power; remember to travel softly, be super kind to yourself and really take your time...and above all else - enjoy the journey!

THE LIGHTHOUSE
Release Date: 2019
Rating: MA 15+
Running Time: 110 mins 
A psychological thriller, directed and produced by Robert Eggers, who co-wrote the screenplay with his brother Max Eggers. Shot in black and white and delivered in a nearly square 1.19:1 ratio, The Lighthouse is a deeply affecting and sinister watch that blurs the lines between horror, art house, mythology and edge of your seat thriller. 
Ephraim Winslow (Robert Pattinson) undertakes a four week contract as a lighthouse keeper on an isolated island off the coast of New England under the guidance of veteran 'wickie' Thomas Wake (Willem Dafoe). As the days stretch into weeks the men succumb to the madness of isolation, the intolerably cruel conditions and the often erratic and irritable behaviours of one another. 
Pattinson and Dafoe are absolutely brilliant here, delivering Oscar worthy, powerhouse performances and going to incredible lengths to create something that is so unforgettably dark and unsettling that I found myself thinking about it for days after.
Steeped in superstition and folklore, the story takes some unexpected turns as it delves into some seriously controversial territory like loneliness, alcoholism, toxic masculinity and hidden identity. The Lighthouse is undoubtedly the most unforgettable movie of the year and will definitely be shocking audiences for many years to come. 
FINAL SAY: Let Neptune strike ye Dead, Winslow!
4 Chilli Peppers ​

Which would you like to have more of in your life, supporters or friends? And do you even need to choose? Can't your friends also be your supporters? Well, in some instances yes they can, but unfortunately in many friendships that is often not the case. So let's take a closer look at what constitutes being a friend compared to being a supporter. 
By definition, a friend  is a person outside of your family circle that you enjoy the company of or feel an affection for; which does not mean that they are necessarily also your supporter. We all have some friends that are great fun to spend time with but when the going gets tough or we need someone to bounce the heavy stuff off of, we aren't necessarily going to call them. That doesn't make them bad friends or 'unworthy of our time or affection' friends, they just aren't in your supporter group. So there clearly is a difference between being a friend and being a supporter, and just because someone is your friend that doesn't automatically mean that they are going to be the best person to head up your personal cheer squad. 
Generally, these are the qualities that I am look for in my friends:

• They enjoy being with me 
• They don't judge me 
• They are generally kind and respectful
• They see me socially on a regular basis
• They are loyal and wouldn't put me down behind my back
• We can enjoy a laugh together

When it comes to supporters, I am looking for people who:

• Are there for me no matter what
• Want me to succeed 
• Will kindly let me know if I'm being out of line
• Comfort me or assist me when I feel overwhelmed or sad
• Share in my joys and losses 
• Have my back 
• Listen - really listen.

I am actually extremely fortunate, because many of my good friends are also my supporters, but I would be lying if I said that they all were. All of my friends are terrific company but some of them are definitely better supporters than others and I am sure that this would be true for most people. And to be honest, I don't expect all of my friends to be my best supporters, it takes time and shared experiences to cultivate strong and committed friendships and sometimes we aren't looking for a supporter anyway. Sometimes I just want someone to hang out with and have a laugh with from time to time and no-one has to be on my personal cheer squad to meet that need. 
When it comes to being a really good friend for others I think that I strive to be a friend and a supporter as much as possible, and at the very least a really good friend. Whether I am sharing my deepest darkest secrets or just having a laugh over dinner, all of my friends are exceptionally valuable to me and I am extremely grateful for each and every one of them. If like me you are also blessed with beautiful friends then make sure that you let them know just how much they mean to you. Cherish your posse and treat your friends like they are made of gold because good friends are something that we all really want, but finding ones that are awesome friends and also excellent supporters is both a rare and a beautiful thing indeed. 

Sometimes in life we believe that we can detect patterns. These patterns can be seen in the way that we ritualistically do things or in the way that we behaviour or react to certain things or even in the behaviours and reactions of others if we are really observant. And sometimes we can even believe that we see patterns in external or unrelated things; and when this happens a lot it can actually be a problem or even a sign of mental unwellness. 
The term apophenia is used to diagnose a condition when people have a tendency to mistakenly perceive patterns or connections between completely unrelated things. Coined by psychiatrist Klaus Conrad in his 1958 publication on the beginning stages of schizophrenia, he defined it as the "unmotivated seeing of connections accompanied by a specific feeling of abnormal meaningfulness." 
People that suffer from apophenia will seek patterns in all kinds of random information. Many gamblers actually suffer from this condition, believing that they can see patterns in lottery numbers, card games and roulette wheels, this type of apophenia is often called "gambler's fallacy."
One more common form of apophenia that we all suffer from is pareidolia and it is when we perceive patterns in visual and auditory stimuli. A common example of this might be to see a shape in the clouds or a face within an inanimate object. Think about all of the people who flocked to see images of Jesus or the Virgin Mary on a piece of toast or a block of wood; these items are terrific examples of pareidolia. And who hasn't seen the man in the moon? We all know what pareidolia feels like and most of us can see the patterns and dismiss them as mere coincidence, but some of us actually cannot. 
As humans we all have a need for order, and in general most of us will choose order and predictability over chance and chaos every time. This tendency does push us to see patterns everywhere, even when they do not exist. So when does seeing or hearing patterns become a problem? Well, at the end of the day, thinking that you have found the face of God in your cereal is not really going to hurt anyone, but making false pattern predictions a lot can be extremely dangerous to your wellbeing and overall safety. Experts recommend that if you are experiencing any of the following pattern recognition errors regularly, you may actually have apophenia. So let's take a look at what those pattern recognition errors are:

• Hearing hidden messages when you play recordings backwards.
• Seeing Godlike images in inanimate objects regularly. 
• Hearing voices or messages in ticking clocks or other repetitive noises. 
• Believing in jinx items or behaviours. 
• All superstitious beliefs and behaviours. 
• Seeing 'signs' in mundane things eg. 11:11 on a clock face. 
• Unwaveringly beliefs in conspiracy theories and unproven ideas. 

Hmmm, turns out that seeing Jesus in your cereal may not be so innocuous after all. So, next time that you find yourself laying on your back thinking that you just saw a dragon fly past in the clouds, spare a thought for the people that suffer from crippling apophenia and can't control their beliefs in patterns. Consider just how difficult a life like that must actually be. What we see as a fun way to pass a moment on a sunny afternoon, is actually an obsession for some poor individuals and having no ability to separate patterns from the randomness of life must be extremely frustrating. This is definitely one of the rare moments when I am truly grateful for the utterly random and unpredictable quality of my own life. 

2020 - what a year! Who could've seen that one coming? Unlike an active volcano, inclement weather or global warming, 2020 completely burst onto the scene with great force and unprecedented change on levels that no-one (not even Nostradamus) could have accurately foreseen or predicted.  And as much as we have all now learned to expect the unexpected, it can still be hard to find the highlights and stay in touch with the joys of life when you feel like you are constantly be blindsided with change  and overwhelmed by uncertainty. 
So let's take a look at what has happened in 2020 so far that has actually been worthy of celebrating, and before you shout out nothing at all, think again, you may have missed some of the good stuff because the bad has taken up all of your attention and space. Turns out that in spite of impeachments, wildfire and COVID-19 there have actually been some good times for us to reflect upon. 

1. Despite January's wildfires burning 18 million acres of Australian bushlands, the devastating bushfires proved that the world could come together and support each other in huge and generous ways. Over $140 million dollars was raised and donated for the victims of the January fires and comedian Celeste Barber broke the Facebook's fundraising platform records by raising $32 million to support firefighters.  
2. The second person in the world was cured of HIV thanks to stem cell treatments. And although the treatment is high-risk and therefore not available to the wider public just yet, it is a massive breakthrough and a genuine sign of greater things to come for the HIV infected population. 
3. COVID-19 might have stopped the world in its tracks, but it certainly didn't slow the heroic efforts of front line healthcare and medical workers who bravely answered the call to care for the sick and dying. Working gruelling hours under extreme and often deeply emotional circumstances, these everyday heroes have saved thousands of lives, tested billions of the world's population and persisted for the sake of humankind. 
4. The oldest fossil of the modern bird to date was discovered this year and it dates back 66 million years - before the age of dinosaurs! The creature, which scientists have named Wonder Chicken looks like a chicken from the front and a duck from the back and tells us a lot about early evolution and has sparked much debate around the origins of the bird species and life form evolution in general. 
5. The world got far more tech savvy and inclusive as people got more inventive and creative with their online usage. Teachers everywhere learned to deliver remote learning programs to their students, famous chefs around the globe uploaded free online cooking lessons, Spotify introduced 'Daily Wellness' playlists, performers, celebrities  and musicians gave us free online concerts and across the globe everyone worked out how to use Zoom and Google Meets. 
6. The first in-vitro fertilized cheetah cubs were born in Columbus Zoo in February, which was a feat for both biology and zoology. The twin cubs bring with them a very hopeful and promising sign that humans may be able to save the globe's endangered species after all. 
7. And last, but not least, the world pollution levels have dropped significantly due to the COVID-19 pandemic. The planet has received a much needed breath of fresh air since so many businesses and transportation systems have reduced or stopped altogether across the globe. In areas like New Delhi, the pollution was recorded to have dropped as much as 60% in just one week of lockdown, and this trend was seen across the world over the last three months. 

So there you go, it's not all doom and gloom after all, and although we didn't see any of the bad things coming, we also missed a lot of the really good stuff as a consequence. So I suppose what I am trying to say is to remember to keep your eye out for the good things and to worry a lot less about the unexpected and unfortunate. 

You are enough. What does that mean exactly? We all want to feel like we are enough, but what does it mean to actually be enough. Well, I can tell you now that it does not mean that you have been assessed, made the grade or finally been considered to be worthy enough to have earned the label of "enough" as many people would think that it does. It also does not mean that you have worked hard enough, pushed hard enough, tried enough or done enough, it actually means none of those things. 
You are enough simply means that you are enough. Right now, as you are right at this moment, you are enough. It means that you are exactly where you are meant to be and for now that is enough, however it does not mean that you are everything, perfect or complete which is something that people seem to get very confused about when they hear that they are enough. 
For some reason, people think that "enough" is some zone of completion or perfection, which is absolutely crazy. For a start there is no such thing as perfection. Perfection is completely subjective and in my opinion generally overrated. Also, since you are a human being, you can never ever be "completed" because you are a work in progress for your entire life and you will never stop growing, learning and evolving, and why on earth would you want to anyway? If being enough really was perfection and completion then it would actually be some kind of personal made hell in the form of stagnation and delusion, so no - being enough has nothing to do with being perfect or competed. 
Being enough is really about just being you. You with all of your messy imperfections, your hang ups and your beautiful broken bits that make you who you are, and also having an awareness that it's perfectly okay to be all of those things. Being enough is knowing that aiming for perfection is a form of self made insanity and thinking that you're perfect is delusional and believing you're 'all done' is seriously mental and definitely limiting. 
You are enough means that you know that you don't have to strive to prove your worth because you know that you have worth. You also don't have to question if you are loveable because you already know that you are. It means that you know without a shadow of  doubt that you can be brave enough to be more open, honest, true, authentic, free, connected, purposeful and intentional in how you present yourself and behave, and it's all good to do so. Being enough means that you can have pride in all aspects of yourself, you don't compare yourself to anyone, you have no need to feel insecure about who you are and you also know that you don't need to judge or compete with anyone because all of those behaviours are pointless and will only slow down your overall progress.
​And do you know why you know all of that?
Because you are enough, that's why.
And don't you forget it! 

When you're regularly asked to social distance, stay at home and keep away from crowds of people it can become pretty easy to feel completely disconnected from the rest of the world. All of your travel plans have been cancelled, concerts and live performances aren't even an option and all of your best laid plans for the last three months have come to a grinding halt, and let's be honest about it, it doesn't really feel that great does it? Some days it can be really hard to find the joy when you're just doing the same monotonous things, feeling cut off from everyone and craving more physical contact.  
When these kinds of feelings last for long periods of time, people can start to feel downright depressed, which is the last thing that anyone needs to be feeling when we are already in the midst of a pandemic. It's all stressful, worrying and uncomfortable enough thanks, no one needs to be feeling depressed on top of it all and that's why maintaining human connection is more important than ever as we navigate these difficult times. 
Here are some sure fire ways to make sure that you are staying connected with the world whilst also maintaining a sense of inner peace of harmony. 
Adapt: Try to keep doing as many of the things that you were doing before COVID-19 hit, just adapt them. Workout online instead of at the gym, go for long walks or ride your bike in nature as a form of exercise, schedule your eating times to happen at the same time as a friend so that you're still socialising, have movie nights with small groups in your home instead of going to the cinema. Get creative with how you can socialise in small groups in your own home eg. have themed dinner party nights, trivia nights, movie nights, cooking classes, game nights or home spa treatments. These will give you something to look forward to and keep you socialising in small groups in safe spaces. 
Touch: Touch is such a rich source of affirmation, security and safety and many of us not only crave it but actually need it. This is probably one of the toughest things for single people to combat during a pandemic, because you just can't go around hugging everyone when you run the possibility of either contracting or passing along a deadly virus, not to mention it's really just generally not okay. In order to counterbalance the loss of the comfort that comes from hugs and physical closeness psychologists recommend a daily call to someone in the form of a Skype, Zoom, Facetime or Meets app situation. Something face to face and regular will help to alleviate the loneliness and feelings of isolation for people that are alone, and for everyone else - well take some comfort in the fabulousness of your relationships and hug the people in your home for longer, kiss your partner more often and just fully enjoy being close to people when you can be safely. 
Self talk: Focus your energies and your internal dialogue around what you can control and not on what you can't. Instead of saying to yourself 'how long will this all last for?' learn to ask yourself this important question every day:
What do I need today in order to feel satisfied, safe and connected? 
Spend more time exploring your own wants, needs and requirements and less time on the 'what if's' around this whole pandemic experience. By learning to attend to your own needs, you will find more joy, a sense of inner peace and maybe even spark some interest in a new activity or hobby to fill in your free time in satisfying and self-connecting ways. 
Talk It Out: If you are feeling anxious, worried or fearful, that's okay - you're not alone! You are allowed to feel those things and you should share those thoughts with others. By talking out your concerns with friends or family, whether it's face to face or over the phone you will reduce your stress levels and give people an awareness about what is going on for you. A reduction in socialisation and connection is genuinely difficult for many people and being honest about your emotions and reaching out to others will definitely build stronger connections and help to alleviate anxiety. 
Get Moving: Whether you like to exercise or not is not really relevant because the science is in! And the fact of the matter is that exercising releases heaps of feel good chemicals like dopamine, endorphins and serotonin, and they lift your mood, reduce your stress and they're completely free as well. You can't argue with that now can you? Exercise is a great way to meet up with friends, get some fresh air  and sunshine into your system and kick off those feel good chemicals, so try to incorporate at least 30 minutes of exercise into your routine a day. It may not always connect you with others, but you will definitely feel better for doing it. 
Be Zen: You know that I love a good meditation, I can't even go a day without it anymore. And there are some kick arse meditation apps out there that are not only great for triggering mindfulness and calm, but are also social and free as well. Check out Insight Timer or Smiling Mind for some inner connection zen time, you won't regret it.