I was getting ready for work the other day and a song from The Lost Boys soundtrack popped up on one of my Spotify playlists, and wow....what a blast from the past! I was instantly transported back to the 1980's, a time when I was an impressionable teenager who was coming of age and was easily obsessed with things of a pop culture nature (not much has changed there). And it was with a smile that I fondly reminisced the things that I had obsessed over at that time in my life. 
The Lost Boys movie was definitely one of those obsessions for me, I loved that film and had Lost Boys posters on the inside my wardrobe because I wasn't allowed to hang pictures up on my bedroom wall. I thought that it was the coolest movie that I had ever seen, probably because it was packed to the rafters with smoking hot teen boys, but I think that I also loved it because all of the characters in the movie seemed to have so many exciting things going on in their lives, and at that time in my life I didn't have a lot going at all, just an intense teenage yearning and a burning curiosity. 
'80's movies will always hold a very special place in my heart, because I was completely obsessed with them as a teenager. Horror, sci-fi, comedy and adventure movies were my favourite genres and I filled many of my bored teenage days with films that I devoutly watched over and over again on the VCR all by myself in the mostly unused and very cold 2nd lounge room of our house. It was there, huddled under a blanket that I spent many wintery weekends, watching and rewatching my favourite movies obsessively. I was almost able to recite some of those films line for line, and I know that that sounds really dorky, but you have to remember that this was a time before the internet and if you weren't running with the cool kids (which I wasn't) there wasn't exactly a lot to do with your time. Besides, a VCR was actually a pretty cool thing to have back then and having access to your own library of tapes was even better!
I was part of the MTV generation, so watching movies was a way to connect with my teenage awkwardness and also a way to vicariously generate some self discovery through the experiences of other teens on screen. It was clearly a time in my life that solidified my movie obsession and also started a genuine thirst within me for more cinematic experiences that would allow me to vicariously see the world through other people's eyes. However, no matter how many movies I watch in my life, I will always and forever have the softest spot for a good '80's teen flick.
Here is a list of my favourite teen movies (in no particular order) that I have seen way too many times for my own good, and even though some of them are not even 3 chilli peppers worthy of being on my genre lists, I cannot deny that I still have a soft spot for the nostalgia that they ignite in me whenever I watch them. 

• The Breakfast Club
• Sixteen Candles
• Ferris Bueller's Day Off
• Weird Science
• Better Off Dead
• Back to the Future
• The Goonies 
• One Crazy Summer
• Fright Night
• Stand by Me

and of course....The Lost Boys.

I have just reached the halfway point of my Autumn holiday break; the time has gone so fast and man oh man, I have been so damn productive! I'm actually pretty chuffed about how much I have managed to get done and genuinely pleased with my consistent efforts to use my time wisely. I've been ticking boxes like a boss, catching up on all of my 'to do' tasks and generally taking care of business in a way that I can't usually manage when I am working and it's been bloody amazing!
In the last 7 days I have serviced my car, been to the dentist, seen the doctor, had a stay in hospital to get something corrected that I've put off for way too long, caught up with my parents, hung out with my kids, had my eyebrows done and my hair trimmed, celebrated a friends birthday, gone to the movies (twice actually), checked out the Picasso collection at the Ballarat Fine Art Gallery, completed an online PD module, finally put all of my New Zealand holiday photos into an album, planned my Easter Sunday gathering and even spent some time drawing and painting. Phew!
Next week I have another art gallery visit, a few blood tests, a catch up with some friends, an overnight trip to Queenscliff, Craig's birthday and also Easter to wrangle; basically a walk in the park after last week's mammoth effort. I am hoping that there will be some room for at least one more decent sleep in before it all comes to an end!
I'm also quite proud of the fact that even though my usual routine has been totally thrown out of the window, I've not compromised on my daily yoga practises, walks, meditation, reading, podcast listening, TV binging or movie watching over the holiday period. I have read almost three books in 10 days and faithfully watched at least one film a day since I went on holidays over a week ago. For some unknown reason a large majority of those films have unintentionally been horror movies, but as a huge horror fan this has presented me with some surprisingly enjoyable viewings.
When it comes to TV, like 95% of the rest of the world, I am most excited about Game of Thrones returning tomorrow to kick off the final and most anticipated TV episodes of all time; which I fully intend to faithfully glue myself to the couch for every Monday evening, for the duration. I can't recall a time when I was so looking forward to a TV show returning before, and I suppose that's because we really don't have to wait for programs to come out that often anymore.
G.O.T. has been an 8 season, 9 year viewing commitment, which is rare even for an avid viewer like myself. The last show that I faithfully watched without missing an episode for 9 entire seasons was Seinfeld which ended in 1998, so yeah, it's been a while since I've been this committed to a TV show. Apparently if you watch the first 7 seasons of G.O.T. all up, it would take two days, 15 hours and 30 minutes, which is how much of my life I have given to the show so far, and clearly I am willing to offer even more! Even though I often tire of a lot of long winded TV series, G.O.T. hasn't worn me out yet, so bring it on I say! I am ready for all of the scandal, dragons,  and visceral goings on that Season 8 can deliver, and if any of the other seasons are something to go on, there is definitely going to be some surprises in store!

John Lennon once said:
It's easier to shout 'Revolution' or 'Power to the People' than it is to look at yourself and try and find out what's real and what isn't, when you try pull the wool over your own eyes and your own hypocrisy. 
I have been really investigating my own essence a lot lately, which sounds bloody kinky I know, but I assure you that it isn't. By essence I mean, who I am at the root of it all. Who I am when no-one is around, who I am when I don't have to be a certain way or fill a certain role, who I actually am when everything is stripped back to the basics. Just me, without my belongings, my friends, my family, my external pretenses, just me and only me, me alone. And it has been one of the strangest and most interesting ponderings that I have engaged in, and it has really made me address my own ethics, values and personal goals. 
Lying to ourselves is so easy, we do it all the time. We create excuses, manufacture obligations, revel in distraction and allow ourselves to engage in the drama of others; all so that we can lie to ourselves, hide from our fears and avoid our true nature. Generally speaking, addressing ourselves face on is a pretty scary prospect, but it is inevitable that at some point in everyone's life that they will have to address themselves and consider their place in this world, whether they want to or not. 
And honestly, everyone probably should. A life spent without any contemplation, reflection or introspection sounds like a pretty crummy life to me, and a rather underdeveloped one as well. If you don't stop to self assess and have a look at yourself once and awhile, well sorry but, you might just be an asshole. Anyone that travels through their entire life without ever pondering themselves, stepping back from their everyday existence and questioning their own motives doesn't sound like someone that I would like to spend time with. 
Anyone who is interested in learning the whole truth about themselves (which the Buddhists call dharma) is a warrior, because facing who you really are at the core of your being takes guts and bravery. Unless you are the enlightened one him or herself, then you are probably going to come up against some shit that you don't necessarily like about yourself. It could be stuff that was programmed into you from an early age, it could be something that you'd said or done that was unkind, it could be a belief about something or someone that you have allowed to cloud your better judgement or could be a habit or opinion that you have formed that no longer serves who you are.
You may feel guilty, bad, ashamed or even terrible about yourself when you start to explore and look at yourself deeper, and you may not like what you find, and that's okay too because it is signpost that you know a better way of being and that you have the power to change your direction. The important thing to do with those feelings is not to linger on them, but to use them to arm yourself with better tools and strategies. By doing this you are teaching yourself to be proactive not reactive to the world around you, and you are cultivating a more stoic and real approach to life. You are training yourself to live without regret and shame, because you know that you are in control of making your own better choices. 
It requires fearlessness and willingness, but it is a worthwhile undertaking to attend to from time to time to help you to grow into the best version of yourself. To face yourself you need to be still and quiet and above all else honest. Acknowledge where you've been, recognise where you are and cultivate a pathway ahead that brings you closer to who you want to be. 
I'm not gonna lie to you, it's frickin hard work, but any work of the self always is. Most of us are more than willing to roll up our sleeves to pitch in and help others, but even more willingly to neglect the work of the self. I tell you with all honesty, the work of the self is where the real growth occurs, so take the wool from your eyes, stop being distracted and spend a little time getting to know yourself on a deeper level because a better you is just around the corner. 

I often get asked by people that never watch horror movies about my levels of tolerance to scary and supernatural material.  'How do you watch all that horror and not get totally freaked out?' they ask me, claiming that the Freddy Kruegers and Babadooks of the cinematic world would keep them awake for nights on end if they were watching it.  
My reply to these enquiries are always the same, and it has nothing to do with having a high tolerance to violent or disturbing material, quite the opposite really. My reason for not being deeply affected by horror is that it is, for the most part, absolutely implausible bullshit. I am not going to be kept awake at night worrying about fictional characters, spooks or demonic behaviours when I know that they are nothing more than the creations of someones overactive imagination.
I totally respect horror for it's genuinely entertaining and inventive storytelling and I enjoy the thrill of watching horror, but it doesn't keep me awake at night or affect me that deeply because my brain can tune it out based on the fact that is all untrue. What does keep me awake at night are movies that are based on true crime stories, actual events and tragedies and tales of home invasion. I have spent a lot more time lying in bed at night trying to clear the cache of some of the stuff on my gritty/ documentary and crime lists than I have ever spent pondering a rogue werewolf or a poltergeist. 
​When a film has an element of realism or fact attached to it then my mind interprets it on a whole other level. I can recall my father telling me when I was small that being scared of ghosts was just plain stupid and that the real dangers in the world and the things to worry about and look out for were the bad people who are very much alive and kicking. 'The dead can't hurt you' he said 'it's the live ones that you need to watch out for.' And I think that I have always hung my hat on that advice and it has allowed me to keep my focus on the rational things to be afraid of and not the fables and fantasies.  
There are some genuinely depraved and sick individuals out there in the world that make your average vampire and werewolf look like kittens. After all, a werewolf is really just a wild animal driven by the need to feed and even a vampire can be taken down with a bit of sunlight and decent sharpened stake, but the real life sickos of the world are far more insidious than that. They are often intelligent, manipulative and far more deranged than any Hollywood monster or horror character has ever been. 
It's the grizzly Ted Bundy, Andrei Chikatilo, Jeffrey Dahmer and John Gacy types of the world that keep me awake at night. Serial stalkers that prey on the weak and the innocent, have no remorse for their actions, cannot control their impulses and are prone to the cruelest and the most violently inhumane acts ever know to man, they are the terrors of the world that mess with my mind at night. They are the reason that I can't listen to True Crime podcasts and avoid watching too many crime investigation dramas. Give me a rampaging ghost or demonic possession over a true crime story any day thanks, at least I know that I will get some sleep and not feel unsafe all of the time. 
Truth is not only stranger than fiction, it is much much darker as well, and it is important to remember that most movie monsters and horror characters are all actually derived from the evils of man in the first place anyway. The real evils of the world are not only more disturbing, they are also constantly humming in the background, unseen and mostly unconsidered as well. And unlike a supernatural villain, they cannot be dismissed as folly or fiction either. There are no Hollywood sets, costumes or blood spatter effects going on in true crime stories, they are about real life monsters and their real life victims and the dreadful terrors that they endured, which easily makes them the most evil, horrific and unforgettable stories to wrap you head around.
​True crime is the stuff of nightmares, not horror movies, and that is why watching horror movies does not  keep me awake at night. 

I love going to the movies or sitting down to watch a film and finding a hidden gem. Sometimes I get the most delightfully unexpected surprise from a movie that I wasn't expecting it from, and I just love it when that happens, it really spins my tyres! And it really doesn't happen as often as I would like, a lot of the time when I leave a cinema or get off the couch after a movie I am left with a rather underwhelmed kind of a feeling or even worse, I start to contemplate the hours that I just wasted and will never get back again!
Life is way too short to waste reading bad books, watching poor movies and wasting your precious and valuable free time having mediocre experiences. Especially cinematic ones, after all that's why you have me! I've already found heaps of hidden gems for you, so you can just relax and enjoy the movies that I consider to be the best (and unmissable) hidden gems that you may have accidentally missed or overlooked.
Now, don't feel bad about it, people actually miss a lot of top quality viewing experiences all of the time because smaller and independent movies just get squashed by blockbuster movies, and most people just aren't going to the movies to see small budget or independent films. They also aren't going to the cinema half as much as I am either I would imagine, so it's more than likely that you've missed some of these rippers along the way, not through any fault of your own, but just from a lack of exposure; but never fear....I've got your back!
In no particular order (and remember that my full reviews of these films are on their genre lists if you want more information), here are my top 20 picks for hidden gem movies that you may have missed: 

1. The One I Love (Romance) 
2. Don Jon (Drama)
3. The Cabin in the Woods (Horror)
4. The Only Lovers Left Alive (Art House)
5. Short Term 12 (Drama)
6. A Ghost Story (Art House)
7. Wind River (Drama)
8. Once (Foreign/Romance)
9. Calvary (Art House/Foreign)
10. Moon (sci-fi)
11. Ingrid Goes West (Drama)
12. Son of Rambow (Comedy)
13. Sightseers (Foreign) 
14. In the Mood for Love (Foreign)
15. Young Adult (Drama)
16. Beautiful Boy (Drama)
17. Me and Earl and the Dying Girl (Drama)
18. Youth (Drama)
19. The Fall (Fantasy)
20. The Grand Seduction (Comedy)

I have only been back at work for two days and I have already found my number one hidden gem movie of the year! How good is that? And when you are as movie obsessed as I am and constantly thirsting for quality entertainment, then that is something to get happy about!

That time has rolled around again, the time for me to collate all of my viewing efforts and put forward my recommendations for the best viewing choices of 2018. As I have mentioned before, quality television really dominated my time this year and I gave more 5 Chilli Pepper ratings to TV series than I gave to movies this year. To be honest, overall I do feel that the quality of movies this year was not as strong as it was in 2017, and I feel like I watched a lot more mediocre movies than I did last year as well, but sometimes that happens. 
In total I viewed 253 movies in 2018 and 133 TV series (some of which had several seasons). I have watched programs across every genre, and I can honestly say that there were excellent offerings in all of those genres in both movies and television. This year I am not going to list my least favorite viewings for 2018 because I have made myself a new years resolution to be more positive and to not focus on the negative things, so to list the worst things I saw in 2018 would be counterproductive to that resolution. Besides, as I have said before, even if I didn't love it, doesn't mean that someone else won't or that it is rubbish. At the end of the day, even the movies that we don't really enjoy have required a lot of time, money and effort to be produced; to shit on someone else's dream or vision is a pretty lousy thing to do, so I am choosing not to go there. 
I hope that you find something on these lists that you have not seen yet and can hopefully now explore. For full reviews of all of the recommended movies below, just go to the appropriate genre tab at the top of the page.
So without any further ado, here are my TOP MOVIE CHOICES (2018 release):  

• ROMA - Foreign 4.5 Chilli Peppers
• Hereditary - Horror 4.5 Chilli Peppers 
• Beautiful Boy - Drama 4.5 Chilli Peppers 
• Isle of Dogs - Kid Friendly 4.5 Chilli Peppers
• BlacKkKlannsman  - Drama 4 Chilli Peppers 
• A Star in Born - Romance 4 Chilli Peppers 
• The Tale - Gritty 4 Chilli Peppers 
• Paddington 2 - Kid Friendly 4 Chilli Peppers 
• Avengers: Infinity War -  Super 4 Chilli Peppers 
• The Ballad of Buster Scruggs - Art House 4 Chilli Peppers 
• Upgrade - Science Fiction/ Action 4 Chilli Peppers  
• John Leguizamo: Latin History for Morons - Documentary 4 Chilli Peppers 

HONORABLE MENTIONS:

• A Quiet Place - Sci-Fi/ Horror 3.5 Chilli Peppers
• Annihilation - Sci-Fi 3.5 Chilli Peppers
• Black Panther - Super 3.5 Chilli Peppers
• Ready Player One - Fantasy 3.5 Chilli Peppers
• The Breaker Upperers - Comedy 3.5 Chilli Peppers
• Searching - Crime 3.5 Chilli Peppers
• Game Night - Comedy 3.5 Chilli Peppers
• Love, Simon - Romance 3.5 Chilli Peppers
• Bohemian Rhapsody - Drama 3.5 Chilli Peppers
• Blockers - Comedy 3.5 Chilli Peppers

Here are my top recommendations for pre- 2018 releases that I didn't see until 2018: 

• Three Billboards Outside Ebbing, Missouri - Drama 5 Chilli Peppers (Hall of Fame)
• Bright Star - Romance 4.5 Chilli Peppers
• Wind River - Drama 4 Chilli Peppers
• Good Time - Drama 4 Chilli Peppers 
• The Shape of Water - Fantasy 4 Chilli Peppers 
• Coco - Kid Friendly 4 Chilli Peppers 
• Mudbound - Drama 4 Chilli Peppers
• Call Me by Your Name  - Romance 4 Chilli Peppers 
• Ingrid Goes West - Drama 4 Chilli Peppers 
• Beasts of No Nation - Gritty 4 Chilli Peppers 
• The Tunnel - Foreign 4 Chilli Peppers 

BEST TELEVISION SERIES of 2018: 

• Master of None S2 - Comedy/ Drama 5 Chilli Peppers 
• One Strange Rock - Documentary 5 Chilli Peppers
• Atlanta S2 - Drama 5 Chilli Peppers
• Sharp Objects - Crime 5 Chilli Peppers
• Patrick Melrose - Drama 5 Chilli Peppers
• Kidding - Drama 4.5 Chilli Peppers
• Who is America? - Comedy/ Documentary 4.5 Chilli Peppers
• Here and Now - Drama 4.5 Chilli Peppers
• Maniac - Sci-Fi 4.5 Chilli Peppers
• Lemony Snicket's a Series of Unfortunate Events S2 - Fantasy/ Kid Friendly 4.5 Chilli Peppers 
• Mosaic - Crime 4 Chilli Peppers
• The End of the Fucking World S1 - Crime 4 Chilli Peppers
• Dirk Gently S2 - Fantasy 4 Chilli Peppers
• Barry S1 - Crime/ Drama 4 Chilli Peppers
• AHS - Apocalypse - Horror 4 Chilli Peppers
• Mr Inbetween - Crime 4 Chilli Peppers
• Salt, Fat, Acid, Heat - Documentary 4 Chilli Peppers
• Just Another Immigrant - Comedy  4 Chilli Peppers
• Mr Mercedes S1 - Crime  4 Chilli Peppers
• Wanderlust - Drama  4 Chilli Peppers
• The Miracle - Foreign  4 Chilli Peppers
• Anne with an E S2 - Drama 4 Chilli Peppers

HONORABLE MENTIONS:

• Britannia S1 - Fantasy 3.5 Chilli Peppers 
• Ash vs Evil Dead S3 - Horror/ Comedy 3.5 Chilli Peppers 
• Swedish Dicks S2 - Comedy/ Crime 3.5 Chilli Peppers 
• Future Man - Sci-Fi/Comedy 3.5 Chilli Peppers 
• GLOW S2 - Drama 3.5 Chilli Peppers 
• The Detectorists S2 - Comedy/ Drama 3.5 Chilli Peppers 
• Sabrina the Teenage Witch - Horror 3.5 Chilli Peppers 
• Wellington Paranormal - Horror/Comedy 3.5 Chilli Peppers 
• The Kominsky Method - Drama/ Comedy 3.5 Chilli Peppers 

So many people have asked me if I think that a remake can be better than an original version of a movie, and my answer is always the same: 'Yes! Of course it can!' With movie technology continually improving, we can now enjoy advanced CGI effects and superior sound and visual experiences, which in short means that we can have a more immersive cinematic experience than we ever could have had before. However, that does not necessarily make the original version redundant or of lesser value and importance, because if I was also asked if remakes were always better the original versions, I would most definitely answer 'Hell No!' 
To this day I still watch a lot of classic movies, and by classic I mean movies from the 1930's to the 1970's. Movies from that time period didn't have a lot of options in the effects and sound department compared to today's standards, so they are often movies that relied on excellent acting and directing to deliver their stories. I have a stockpile of movies on my 'still need to see' list (which seems to be ever expanding and absolutely endless) and around 70% of them would fall into the classic film category. Most of them are very good, some of them are downright legendary and could not be improved upon by a remake, but some of them certainly could. 
To be better than the original movie, there needs to be an improvement on all fronts, and not just in the effects department, because if the storyline is thin then my attention is never held for very long by CGI effects and all of the other bells and whistles that filmmakers feel compelled to throw at movies. For me, there needs to be something fresh about a remake that warrants the movie being remade in the first place. The perspective needs to alter in some way or the story has to become enhanced or given more depth or meaning in a remake. The actors need to be every bit as good and preferably better than the original actors and the director needs to be an avid fan of the original in a way that forces them to keep the integrity of the original intact, in other words it needs to not feel like a director's ego trip, which has happened so many times in remakes. 
There have in fact been heaps of excellent remakes that are deserving of your time, even if you have seen and enjoyed the original version. 
Here is my list of the best movie remakes that I have experienced, in no particular order:
Romeo and Juliet -Baz Luhrmann perfectly remixed this Shakespearean classic by installing a couple of modern heart-throbs and infusing it with a funky fresh soundtrack, and it is slice of pure brilliance. 
Mad Max: Fury Road - I also really liked the original, but the heart-pounding, high octane, adrenaline rush action of the remake was just so damn good, oh and Tom Hardy was in it, definitely a bonus. 
The Jungle Book - Jon Favreau's version of this Rudyard Kipling's classic is a perfect example of how CGI can be used to enhance an experience. It is magical!
Dawn of the Dead - This comedy/ horror homage to George A. Romero from Zack Snyder is a brain eating spectacular, so much blood and tasteless humour! 
Blair Witch - I didn't really like The Blair Witch Project original, but I really got creeped out by the 2016 remake that was simply called Blair Witch. Kept me away from camping for years!
A Star is Born - remade four times, and finally they got it right! The onscreen chemistry  of Coops and Gaga and the modern musical score made this new take an old romance a real winner. 
Ghostbusters - The girls had a swing at it in 2016 and were every bit as good as the boys were in 1984, and they didn't try to 'remake' it so much as have another go at something similar and I enjoyed it a lot. 
The Ring - The 1998 Japanese version was still really good, but the 2002 Gore Verbinski English language remake had an expanded storyline and some extra creepy CGI visuals. The acting was seriously stepped up in this version as well. 
Bram Stoker's Dracula - Dracula has been done to death (pardon the pun) but when Francis Ford Coppola had a go, well it was just magic, finally something Stoker would've loved!
IT - Probably the best horror remake of all time, the effects and storyline have been fine tuned to perfection, unmissable remake material. 
Charlie and the Chocolate Factory -Tim Burton takes us on a delicious and disturbing romp into Willy Wonka's chocolate factory in this accurate realisation of Roald Dahl's classic tale that his own family were involved in creating.
King Kong - Peter Jackson's epic realisation of Skull Island and the tragic tale of Mighty Kong is by far the best version to see for all of it's impressive CGI effects and in depth story telling. 

Lots to consider at the moment.
The world is kind of whizzing past me in a wild flurry of activity and I am desperately trying to keep a hold on everything and remain positive, polite and jovial. Enjoy the ride Barb...remember you said you were going to enjoy the ride? says the voice in the back of my mind. And then the voice in the front of my mind says, what are you bloody well doing lollygagging about when Christmas is coming in twenty days? You aren't even close to ready for this!  
And I am constantly fighting between these two state of being at the moment, one is a state of blissful acceptance and joyful meandering and the other is a state of slight concern and mild panic. I say mild panic because I am not actually freaking out, but I do know that things are starting to mount up around me and that I am having to try my best to eliminate any clutter as it occurs so that it doesn't get too hectic. However, this need to eliminate the clutter as soon as possible has also caused another condition to occur; the 'too many balls in the air' condition that plagues everyone at some point around the silly season. Curses on the balls I say, I don't want balls to keep in the air, I want a blissful ride! 
Unfortunately, most of these said 'balls' have just arrived of their own volition and have not been of my own making at all, and this entire experience has swiftly reminded me that no matter how good my intentions may have been to remain all zen and joyful on the road to Christmas, that the rest of the world is not always sharing that sentiment with me and that poses a pretty big challenge to my plans. Every year I tell myself to slow down and enjoy the ride and every year it gets harder and harder to follow through with that idea because everyone else seems to be stressing out around me. 
It can be really hard to find enough down time at this time of the year as well, which means that I don't get nearly enough time on the yoga mat, the hiking tracks or the meditation pillow and that generally means that I am not really operating at my most tolerant levels either; and when you go and smash that together with every other pre-Christmas concern and 55 very tired foundation students a day...well, you know where this is going...not to a very zen like place that's for sure. 
However, as I said it is only slight concern and mild panic at this point, certainly nothing that I cannot manage and considering some of the side balls that I have had tossed at me over the last week, I think that I am actually doing okay. Got a whole new mantra going and everything:
Enjoy the ride Barb...enjoy the ride!

Just when you think that you have dealt with the worst of the weather for the year, another round of cold, windy and rainy days arrives, swiftly reminding me that I live in Western Victoria and that November is definitely no guarantee of clear skies and sunshine. However, to be completely fair and honest, it is actually quite nice to have a very decent excuse to pound the couch and catch up on a lot of television that I have stockpiled over the last few weeks, so the recent bout of bad weather hasn't really dampened my spirits that much at all. 
Quality television opportunities are arriving in buckets at the moment, and I am seriously struggling to keep up with the high volume of television series that have continually popped up over the last few months. Never in my life have I watched this much television before, and for good reason, there never used to be this much good television to indulge in! These days, that is certainly not the case, because as soon as I finish one series another six sprout up in it's place. It's like whacking the head off a hydra, the more that you cull the more that new ones seem to arise in their place and it is getting harder and harder to squeeze in as many movies as I would like now that I am getting snowed under with television. 
And I suppose that's why it is imperative to also be really discerning about which television programmes you put your time and energy into, because you can literally find yourself watching hours and hours of mediocre shit just because the show delivered a strong and promising pilot episode and now you feel compelled to see it through. Trust me, I have been roped into watching a number of TV series for that very reason, and I have since learnt that being faithful to a television series but not discerning about its actual content will waste hours of your life that you will never get back, so don't let a series hoodwink you into watching series upon series of tripe if it's not going anywhere, there's too much good stuff around these days to allow yourself to do that. 
Here's my top ten 'avoid at all costs' (aka. what a load of shit) television shows that are not worthy of yours (or anyones for that matter) time:
1. The Walking Dead - probably the most pitifully sad, dragged out, outdated garbage that is still being peddled to the masses. Woefully bad and shameful, I actually feel bad for the cast now, they even look bored delivering it.
2. Modern Family - I think that nine seasons of this has been rolled out now, and it is always the same formula. In nine years not one character has developed beyond who they were in season one, how is that even possible? Blah!
3. The Bachelor / The Bachelorette - why are people even watching shows like this? The premise is awful, the people despicable and the whole concept is deplorable, need I say more? 
4.The Exorcist - we did not need to go here, no one needed to go here, I went there...I really wish I hadn't! The movie is more than enough of that thanks very much, can't believe it got 2 seasons!
5.  Nailed It! - Any television show that has founded its name from a meme or Youtube channel is never worthy of your time, this is just pitiful viewing. The cakes on this show are bad for a reason, the bakers are fucking idiots! 
6. The Handmaid's Tale s2 - started out with some promise, and I was enjoying it, and then.....they totally dropped the ball and went for cheesy and unbelievably stupid story arcs that all had to involve torture or brutal death scenes. Season 1's boots were too big to fill. 
7. Snowfall - I sat through two full seasons of this show about drug dealers because I really liked the first two episodes. It did not get better than the first two episodes, but rather proceeded into a slow and arduous decline. I wasted hours hoping it would improve ...a waste of my time! 
8. American Survivor - if you thought that Australian survivor was getting sad, think again. American Survivor is gut wrenchingly sad, it is utterly unwatchable in every respect and quite possibly the saddest shit on modern television. 
9. No Tomorrow - I was sucked into watching this because it had good online reviews, it was also the last time that I allowed online reviews to dictate what I watch. Think fuzz feel good meets apocalypse and gets all kissy and convenient and you'll be in the wheelhouse. God it was bad. How it got good reviews still kills me. 
10. America's Next top Model - I admit that I got pulled back in this year and gave it another go, and I did love to hate all of the bitchy waifs as they fought their way to the top, but at the end of the day it is a dreadful show. Even when they are trying to be all forward thinking with plus size models and a controversial judging panel, everyone knows that the fashion industry is still as deep as a puddle and rife with terrible people. 
So there it is, my avoid at all costs television list. Hopefully you won't fall into any of those horrific and painful viewing experiences yourself!

Trick 'r Treating on October 31st in Australia sure is a hotly contested topic. I heard some ladies at the hairdressers tonight going right off about it, they were saying that it is stupid and American and unseasonal and that if any kids knock on their doors looking for candy they will tell them to piss off! Woah, a bit harsh I thought. Sure, it isn't Autumn here when Halloween occurs which does make it a little un-pumpkin, chestnut and acorn friendly, but aside of that, it isn't actually American at all, it's Pagan and the bottom line is that it's fun! 
Kids love Halloween, they love dressing up and playing spooks and who wouldn't want to knock on peoples doors and get free lollies? Uh, it's frickin amazing and just because we never got to do it when we were kids doesn't mean that we shouldn't let them do it now. If you're going to use un-seasonal as your excuse for hating Trick 'r Treaters then boo to you, you're lame! I bet you still eat roasts at Christmas time even when it's hot and do all of the other Pagan based stuff the happens at Yuletide like  bringing an evergreen into your home and decorating it to welcome the coming spring....aka your Christmas Tree! That is not very seasonally appropriate is it? But it is fun, so we do it and Halloween shouldn't be any different. 
The ladies that were paying out Halloween tonight were also saying how sick it was to send your kids out for candy to strangers houses. Yes, sending your kids out to strangers houses for candy is sick, which is why 99% of the kids participating have an adult with them when they Trick 'r Treat. Safe and wholesome Halloween Trick 'r Treating can be orchestrated and seriously, if you were some Sweeney Todd type trying to lure kids into your home with candy to turn them into pies, you would hardly chose to do that on Halloween when there would be possible witnesses and the most easily traceable crime trail in all history would you? I bet that half of the people that say things like that wouldn't think twice about plopping their poor kids onto some unknown santa's lap at the mall for a happy snap would they? Are those kinds of strangers in red suits that hug unknown children at the mall better than the strangers that give out candy on Halloween? Doubtful, very bloody doubtful, but people only see what they want to see. 
We actually have a lot of little Trick 'r Treaters out here in Enfield ever year and it doesn't offend me in the least. They are often quite small and very enthusiastic and the vast majority of them are done and dusted by 7.30pm. They dress up like their lives depend on it, their faces painted and little plastic pumpkin bags in their hands, and they are always super grateful for the lollies that they receive. Some good samaritan mails everyone in our area an orange balloon to hang on their letterbox on the evening of Halloween and if you don't want to participate you just don't hang your balloon and if you run out of candy you just take your balloon down, pretty simple really. It's organised, it's optional and it's safe because all of the children are accompanied by an adult. Where is the harm in that? 
Sometimes I think that people just decide that they don't like Halloween because they can't be bothered, which essentially is fine, no-one says that you have to be bothered; but please stop making it out to be such a big horrible ordeal when it really isn't. Halloween to kids means fun, and well, even to some adults too if I'm being really honest about it, so stop being such bloody grumpy goblins, buy a few lollies and join in the fun as well, it's only one night of the year for goodness sake! 

Celebrated Halloween a little early this year, perhaps it was the full moon or maybe it was just because the 27th was the closest date that we could all manage to gather together, but whatever the reason, the Samhain vibes were flowing on Saturday. 
Whenever people get together at my place, there is always food involved. Not only do I love to eat, I also really love to cook as well, so any celebration is a good occasion for a big cook up around the bench in Enfield. Which is exactly what Zoe, Seth, Helen, Craig and I did this year, we made a delicious feast from scratch to share together.
​Our meal consisted of two different types of ravioli (pumpkin/feta and beef/mushroom) and a delicious tomato based sauce to accompany them. We also made vanilla poached pears in a salted caramel sauce with vanilla ice-cream for dessert, which was an amazing and decadent finish to our evening's festivities. Whilst we cooked, we listened to some tunes and shared some Halloween-ish cocktails and then spent the dark hours indulging in one of my favourite things in the world, B-grade horror. 
I absolutely love B-grade horror, especially B-grade horror from the 80's and 90's because those two decades were rife with poor writing, dreadfully acting, mediocre effects and cliche horror tropes that make them so damn awful that they are absolutely hilarious. I usually call them D-grade because they are so genuinely bad, which should give you some idea of the quality that I am talking about, D-grade means 'woah-fully good' material to me.
On the agenda for B-Grade gold this year? Tales from the Crypt: Bordello of Blood, the name really says it all doesn't it? It is truly classy viewing, I can assure you. Made in 1996, this 87 minute fantasy/horror got a whopping 12% on Rotten Tomatoes, and stars Angie Everhart and Corey Feldman in two of the lead roles; need I say more? In a word it is dreadful; rife with grotuetous titty shots, full of cheesy one liners, the soundtrack seems like it was recorded by someone that cannot sing in their living room with a boombox and the characters are dressed primarily in cheap silks, denim jackets and tennis shorts. It is just so bad that it defies explanation really, it's the ultimate B-grade horror find, and after a few nice strong cocktails, it is the funniest movie that you could ever see. We were literally crying with laughter at some points during the movie. 
And that is how all B-grade horror/ fantasy and sci-fi movies need to be viewed, half pissed and with really good company. Over the years we have watched some absolutely pearlers out here together that just shouldn't be missed; they are so bad, they are actually good! 
Some of my personal favourites and highly recommended B-Grade offerings are:

• Big Trouble in Little China (1986)
• Killer Klowns from Outer Space (1988)
• Vampires: Los Muertos (2002) - just outside of the 90's era but you'd never know!
• They Live (1988)
• Evil Dead 3: The Army of Darkness (1992)
• Tremors (1990)
• Highlander (1986)
• Tales from the Crypt: Demon Knight (1995)
• Day of the Dead (1985)
• Critters (1986) 
• The Thing (1982) 
• Warlock (1989)
• Elvira: Mistress of the Dark (1988)
• Manos: The Hands of Fate (1966)  -a bit older, and quite possibly the worst horror movie ever made, it is unbelievably bad and hilarious. 

With Halloween just around the corner, you don't have to opt for a serious horror movie scare; a cheesy B-Grade retro horrorfest is just as enjoyable, and maybe even a lot more fun! 

Don't really know what happened, but somehow October just arrived. How we have already reached the tenth month of the year fills me with great confusion and concern, because it was around October last year that I went for my first job interview in over a decade and started to forge a new way of being for myself. In some ways that feels like it was very long time ago, because I have made so many changes to my life since October last year, and then in other ways it feels like it was only a few months ago that I plucked up enough guts to throw caution to the wind and put myself out there again.
However, no matter how you look at it, there is no denying that October has just snuck in the back door and that we have well and truly arrived at the 'ber' months of the year. This means that it will only be a matter of time before the onslaught of 'way too bloody early' Christmas propaganda and paraphernalia arrives in stores, spurring on early hysteria and panic among the masses and obligating us all to make lists, shop and prepare. Bottom line for me here is that there is no fricken' way that I am ready for another Christmas yet, and I flat out refuse to acknowledge any of that early stuff and nonsense of Christmas until I have at least managed to milk a decent Halloween celebration out of October. 
Until the ghosts, goblins and ghouls have come out to play for Samhain, I am not doing any department store trees, front yard twinkling lights, Christmas shopping lists or pudding recipe chatter, I will not even entertain it! The Christmas decorations and Christmas tree do not come out in our house until the start of December, and then (and only then) will I happily allow a full 25 days of hysteria and anticipation, damn I'll even encourage it! But just like eating easter eggs before Easter Sunday or hot cross buns before the week of Easter arrives, some things are better to wait for and Christmas mania definitely falls into that category for me. 
Nope, October is all about freaky deaky horror for me, the freak-ier and deak-ier the better. I generally re-watch all of my fave horror movies over October and search out some new material to bring to the fold as well. Making candy apples, carving pumpkins and inventing dark and desirable new cocktails is what October is for. And it's the last month to splurge in couch slouching before the weather gets really hot and we all get a lot more social and start heading outdoors in the evenings.
So, with only four weeks until Halloween (and impending hysteria) arrives, I think that I might get my thinking cap on and plan a night of fun and festivities in Enfield. And above all, there will have to be some terrifically terrifying movie choices for my guests, so I must begin my research asap!

I did something this week that I have never done before in my life, I asked to speak to a manager about poor customer service. Being a person who used to work in the service industry myself, I think that I am pretty lenient when it comes to customer service. I understand that no-one can be at their best 100% of the time and I am usually reasonably accommodating to that fact. I normally would never request to speak a store manager to complain or 'dob' in a worker for their poor service, but on Friday at a well known Australian supermarket chain, I did. And I did it because of the disgraceful service that I received from not one, but two of their staff. 
Let me tell you exactly what occurred. I was in the fresh produce section and realised that there were no produce plastic bags on the rolls in the area that I was in, none in that entire row actually, and I stopped a young female staff member as she was scooting past me and asked -'excuse me, there are no plastic bags in this aisle, could I please get some more?' She did not speak to me, but held out a hand and pointed to another staff member at the other end of the isle, which I found extremely rude for a start. Then when I started to approach the other staff member that she had directed me towards, she quickly wheeled her cart out the back and was gone. Hmmmmm....okay, clearly not the best customer service day at this supermarket, but I just laughed and turned to Seth and commented to him that it was a 'not my job - not my problem' situation and went on with my shopping. 
That was when I overheard the young female staff member that I had first approached at the end of another produce isle, casually bitching to a fellow staff member about how rude all of the customers were today and how she was tired of our surly behaviour. They were both laughing and agreeing and then the first female walked away and the one that she was moaning to came to my end of the produce section. I'm not going to lie here, I was actually pretty annoyed at this stage and I approached the new female staff member and calmly said 'Hello, I was wondering if we could get some plastic bags on the rolls down this isle because there aren't any. I did already ask the young lady that was busy bitching to you down the other end about how surly the customers are today, but she didn't even have the respect to speak to me.'
At first the girl looked shocked, she shifted from foot to foot and then she laughed and said 'we don't have any more bags,' and then she turned her back to me and went on with stacking the fruit. I went on to say, 'you are joking, are you seriously trying to tell me that there aren't any replacement produce bags in this supermarket?' and she then replied to me in a very condescending tone.... now wait for it because this was the when the pin popped out of my grenade, 'there's some in other isles you know, just go and get one from the other end of the produce section.' And that was it, I was just absolutely livid...I felt really really angry, I was triggered, it was like a bomb went off in me. For some reason this simple chain of events had really got me cross, cross enough to go to another staff member and ask to speak to a manager. 
I would like to point out that in spite of me feeling exceptionally cross, I did not yell and I did not abuse anyone, I just calmly told the manager what had happened, and I stated that the young ladies had made me feel extremely unwelcome in the store and that the customer service standards were absolutely appalling. And get this, while I was telling the manager my story, the two young ladies that had just made me feel like crap were standing together in the produce section eyeballing me, whispering behind their hands and giggling, which I also pointed out to the manager in the hope that they would get a decent arse kicking for being so flippant and rude. 
Easily the worst customer service that I have ever had in my life - EVER! And after speaking to the manager who just seemed as ill equipped and lost as his dreadful produce girls, I went home and got onto the supermarket website and made another formal complaint. I was on a roll! And like I said, I would normally just let things go, but I have never felt so mistreated in a shopping environment in my entire life, and considering the fact that I didn't even shout, demand or abuse anyone, then the treatment that I got was totally uncalled for as well. 
I am hoping that this is just an isolated incident and that it isn't an illustration of how low customer service standards have fallen recently, because if I had to put up with that shit every time that I went out shopping, then I would just start to shop online. Talk about ruining a person's zen on a Friday afternoon, it was not a nice start to my weekend at all!

Mental wellness is something that most of us will struggle with at some point in our lives. Even the most seemingly 'put together' people have lapses into the world of imbalanced thought and mental challenge from time to time, they are just a lot better at hiding it from everyone. However, whatever walk of life you are from, whatever your background is, whatever your social standing is, you will inevitably, at some point, feel not so fantastic, wonder what the hell you are doing with your life and question whether you are operating at your best. 
It's completely normal to not feel 100% mentally balanced all of the time, hell some people lead very regular lives and feel mostly mentally unwell a lot of the time, it's just not something that a lot of people feel comfortable about proclaiming to the world, because no-one really wants to appear like they haven't got their shit together. However, letting pride dictate how we deal with our mental health issues is archaic and unproductive to societal wellness and we really need to strive to move away from that outdated and counterproductive mindset. We all really need to know, that it is totally okay to not feel okay all of the time. 
​As time rolls on and the methods of researching mental health improve, we are learning how to diagnose, treat and support each with our mental wellness; the old school shame and stigma that was attached to mental health is now being shed and people are feeling more comfortable to come forward, share their stories and be honest about how they are feeling, and in turn receive better support than they ever have been able to before. 
It is a brave new world when it comes to mental health. Gone are the days of closet depression and hidden anxieties as people are now learning to recognize and own their individual mental wellness levels. More people than ever before are seeking treatment and support and we are slowly but surely learning tolerance, detection, prevention and intervention that will definitely set us up for a brighter future together in the coming years.
And the real work surrounding mental wellness is something that we need to be vigilant about every day.  Each of us must make an effort to recognize the signs within ourselves that tell us when our levy has run dry or we have met our own personal limits. And those limits are unique for everyone, and we must respect that and support that understanding. We must become ninjas at recognizing when we are at the top of our game and when we may be feeling weak. When we are at our peak, we have an obligation to assist those that may be feeling weak, and when we are weak we need to feel safe and secure enough to seek support from the strong. We all owe it to each other to be tolerant, supportive and unwavering in our commitment to our own mental health and our support of the wellness of others. 
R U OK? Day is coming up on Thursday September 13th,  which is a national day dedicated to reminding us that we need to check in with each other and support each other with mental wellness. Don't forget to check in with your friends, family, work colleagues and community on that day, and every other day that you can when you are feeling strong enough to support the wellbeing of others. Mental health is the responsibility of us all and it's not something that we can ever afford to ignore. 

Movies that are based on games....hmmm.....not exactly the most successful movie genre and for a good reason really, because most of them are absolutely shithouse. Time and time again movie makers have attempted to recreate the magic of a quality game experience and interpret it into an engaging movie, and time and time again they have failed dismally. 
Why do games adapted into movies fail so often? Simply because games put you into a first person experience; a complete immersion into a full blown sensory experience. No movie, no matter how awesome it is, can offer the same level of immersion that a game can. There is a reason that people can wander around in the open play landscapes of a game for hours on end, and it is not just because the graphics are awesome. It's because they are in control of the environment and the events that play out, in a movie the only one in control is the director and half the time they are working with a pretty thin storyline. 
Games do not require multi layered or deeply intelligent storylines, and I mean no respect to gamers by saying that. But it is true, most gamers prefer a simple storyline, if they wanted something deeper they would be watching movies and not gaming. Gamers want to solve puzzles, navigate landscapes and basically level up, sure some storyline is required so that players can engage with their characters and the situation or problem within the game, but it doesn't need to be excessively complex or convoluted. More weapons and power ups and less of the jibber jabber is generally appreciated by a lot of gamers. Therefore, when a film studio picks up on a game that is hugely popular and then attempts to interpret it into an epic blockbuster it fails dismally, because most games aren't designed for storyline or character development, which are essential components in any decent movie. 
Quite often, hit movies are re-interpreted into games with some level of success, especially children's movies which require less storyline overall in game play mode. Those Lego games are so damn entertaining and I have wasted days of my life playing those, and every successful Disney movie ever made has spawned a game off the back of it's box office success, from Toy Story to The Pirates of Caribbean, there have been so many. Also children's movies with a fantasy or magical element to them transition seamlessly to a first player gaming model; Harry Potter and LOTR games are great examples of that. It seems that going from a movie to a game is a much better formula overall than going from a game to  a movie.
Have there actually been any good game to movie interpretations? A couple were okay, and I do say that generously, but they are pretty damn thin on the ground. Generally they are unwatchable shit but I am hoping that someday soon a director will hit the right formula and prove to everyone that the gaming genre can be interpreted well. 
Here is my list of the best game to movie adaptations, but as I said...it's thin on the ground and it's a rather sad line up overall. 
1. Silent Hill - hardly brilliant material, but for fans of horror it's a worthy watch, just so that you know who Pyramid Head and those weird arse nurses are. 3 Chilli Peppers
2. Resident Evil - the first one was watchable and that's where the joy ends. 2.5 Chilli Peppers
3. Prince of Persia - it has a very buff Jake Gyllenhaal in it, for that reason alone it is worth a look. 2 Chilli Peppers
4. Warcraft- I know that I slept through most of this film, but I also know that they tried really hard to make this watchable, so kudos for that. 1.5 Chilli Peppers
5. Tomb Raider - They just keep on coming, and they aren't getting any better. Marginally tolerable material with lots of hot chicks, but shithouse storylines.  1 Chilli Pepper
6. Assassins Creed - it has Michael Fassbender in it, that immediately earned it a chilli pepper. 1 Chilli Pepper

Even though I like to think of myself as being reasonably tech savvy, the truth is that I am still totally old school when it comes to certain things. Everyone that was born a Gen X (as I was) or earlier likes to imagine that they are really up with the latest mod cons and gadgetry that is available today, but anyone that even says 'mod cons' is not nearly as tech savvy as they would like to think they are and I know for a fact that I fall into that category. 
I shamefully still read all of my books and magazines in hard copy, regardless of the abundant opportunities that I have to go digital, which is pretty crazy but hey, I like to feel a book in my hand, it's part of my make up now. In fact I even still subscribe to magazines in hard copy and borrow books and DVD's from the local library  which I am pretty sure that no-one under 40 is doing these days. But as I said, it's in my blood now. When you have been doing something for long enough, it is hard to let go of it, even when you are aware that a new and probably better way is available to you. 
So is that just a way of kicking it old school or is it really being an old fuddy duddy pain in the arse? Because I think that I am starting to tread a thin line lately. I still adore a whole lot of old school and dated things that most people are totally over. Like photographs, not instagram shots, but real photos of real people doing real things, that you can hold in your hand. Why do people not like photographs as much anymore? I am still nuts about photos and photo albums and I especially like really old photographs. I also still adore the virtually unused but absolutely amazing fountain pen, and I adore handwritten notes, poetry, cards and letters. I love home cooking, board games, collecting and handwriting recipes into my recipe book, keeping a journal, baking bread, picnics, talking on the phone and retro music compilations. 
Just the other day I caught myself reminiscing about an old school milk bar, the type that had all of the one and two cent lollies lined up under the glass and you could get a little white bag of goodies that were individually selected for just 10 cents. And there were real treasures to be had if you could be patient enough to save up for them, like the all so chic chocolate cigarettes at 25 cents a packet or the illustrious Bubble O' Bill that would set you back a few days of after school bliss to indulge in. I hate to use the term kids these days, but hell, I kind of have to....kids these days will never understand the joy of such a selection or the excitement that was felt when you spied the stamp for a free Sunny Boy ice block on the inside of the wrapper of the one that you had just opened. Pure innocent joy.
And kids today will never understand that joy because everything for them now is completely accessible and available all of the time. Nothing when I was growing up was available all of the time, and although it meant that we had to wait for everything, I think that we also cared about it more for that reason as well. It is true that innovation and technology has enabled a lot of progression, but some of those advances have caused societal and social setbacks that I doubt that any of us could've predicted.
So many people are virtually glued to their devices 24/7 now and they are completely removed from a lot of simple life pleasures. People are spending hours posting pictures, having rants and sharing various goings on about their lives on social media, but half of them don't even know how to hold a decent conversation anymore. It's pretty woeful in some respects. If keeping some old school practises alive makes me feel more alive and in touch with my life, then I am certainly not in any hurry to give them away. Call me corny or old fashioned, it really doesn't matter to me. I like what I like, and although I do love technology, I will always have a place in my heart for the traditional, the old school and the outdated things, even when everyone else has decided that they are unnecessary. 
​And did I tell you how much I love old school horror yet? 

As much as we want everything to remain somewhat logical in our lives, we do have to make peace with the reality of our lives as well, and that means that we need to be able to accept that some things just won't make any sense. In life, there will be many unanswered questions, confusing interludes, incomplete stories and unsolvable dilemmas, and that is just the tip of the iceberg, because essentially life is just one big mystery and for that reason, some parts of it are not going to make any sense at all; not even a bit. Some parts of your life will be downright frustrating and annoying and absolutely illogical and no matter how much you ponder it, it just won't make any sense. 
And there is absolutely nothing wrong with things not making sense or 'adding-up' in our lives, it should be expected a little more often if you ask me because it happens to us all from time to time. However, learning to accept that some things just won't make any sense and may not ever be properly resolved or understood can be extremely challenging for many of us. Knowing that some things just won't make sense and accepting that some things just won't make sense are not that same thing, and people get into all sorts of bother when they cannot accept when things aren't balancing out with their expectations or ideals.
We all like to imagine that our lives are pretty linear and that we have a certain amount of control over how things will play out for us. We also all get a bit excited about the prospect of a happy ending, a tidy resolution or a big box with a bow that we can pop things into and forget about until we are ready to pull them back out again; but in truth, life rarely allows for things to be that organized and logical, we just like to give ourselves the illusion that it does because it feels a shitload safer and saner than admitting that a lot of the time things just don't make any sense. 
Now I know that some people are going to disagree with me on this topic, claiming that there is always a reason for everything and that nothing just happens without there being a bigger or higher purpose to it all; and to those people I say bullshit!  You can believe whatever you want, but trust me when I tell you that not everything that happens in life occurs for a reason. A whole lot of shit that happens (and will happen to you in life) is utterly purposeless, pointless, meaningless and inconsequential, it is just stuff that happens that doesn't make sense and it doesn't need to. You don't need to fix it, you don't need to stay up late at night deconstructing it, you just have to accept it. It is that simple. Rather than adopting some privileged 'everything happens for a reason' mantra, what you really need to adopt  is the smarts to recognise what you can control in this life and what you cannot. What is worth your time and what is not and what needs fixing and what just needs to be accepted.
One of the greatest challenges that we are presented with in this life is learning to accept that some chapters in our lives have to close without any real closure at all and that no matter how many hours we may pour into some puzzles, the truth is that they were never actually made to be solved in the first place. Some things just won't make sense and nothing that we do, will ever make that truth any different and all that you have to do is accept that fact and get on with living your life. 

When we think about what get passed along to us from our families in a hereditarial fashion we generally think about things like physical attributes or genetic indicators, be they good or bad; but we really don't consider what else has been passed along to us that could be causing a lot of damage to our general well being. 
Recent research now indicates that trauma or post traumatic stress disorders (PSTD) can actually impact the next generation through what is known as transgenerational trauma. We all know that trauma is an emotional response to something distressing or disturbing and victims of trauma quite often suffer from recurring nightmares, depression and a range of other stress related illnesses that can have a serious impact on their ability to function in society and within their communities. However, we also now have mounting scientific evidence that proves that future generations of trauma victims can be affected biologically by the trauma that their families went through. 
The studies began with descendants of survivors of the Holocaust, who in spite of being removed from their parents' experiences, were seeking mental health treatment. Similar findings were discovered when studies were also undertaken on other descendants of families that had experienced the destructive effects of catastrophic events such as war, genocide and terrorism; many were suffering from mental health conditions and in some instances the rates of suicide were also notably higher. 
A study from Neuroscience found that stress had an impact on a person's "epigenetic markers" which perform modifications to gene expression instead of a change to the genetic code itself. In the study, mice who had been exposed to trauma early in life displayed behaviours consistent with depression as well as impaired metabolism. The symptoms were passed on, not through genetics but through the father's sperm, and it impacted the next generation of mice.
These findings are already beginning to be put to good use. At a hospital in Atlanta, trauma victims in the ER who tested positive for the genes associated with PTSD received psychotherapy which in turn lead to the development of fewer symptoms. 
It is good to know that science is helping us to decode the links between historical trauma and how it possibly links to the escalating levels of anxiety and depression in society today. Transgenerational trauma reminds us all that our family and cultural history is shaping who we are today and that seeking support and treatment for any type of trauma related symptom is vital in eliminating it for future generations. 

I have succumbed to the dreaded lurgy that is floating around at the moment and it is just horrid! Started off on Friday night with a lovely bout of nausea followed by explosive vomiting, then came the headaches, then came the body aches and now I have the phlegmy, coughy, grossy and mostly miserable tail end of it to content with. The thing that I most pissed off about is that it has dominated my weekend, two entirely wasted days of sickness. I've spent 90% of the weekend in bed sleeping and for someone like me that likes to milk as much out of my day, this has been a real test.
The most that I have done this weekend was a 4 hour game of Risk with Craig and Seth which was actually exhausting, so that should put things into perspective for you. For anyone that doesn't know what Risk is, it's a strategy board game where the most physical aspect is rolling three dice at one time, and that exhausted me! I am so pitiful that I had to quit the game, I couldn't even finish it, how sad is that?
Last year I prided myself in not even getting a sniffle for the entire year, in fact I haven't had a really significant head cold or a flu for over two years now, and I never take the free immunisation that I am offered at school every year. However, this year, ever since dentist death had a go at my teeth and annihilated me, I have fallen prey to every little germ that has come my way. Which basically means that that horrific incident with my teeth has completely destroyed all of my immunity and I now have a crappy constitution and I am not happy about that at all! 
After working in schools for over a decade I have built up a pretty good level of immunity, I rarely get sick and if I do it is never for very long. I have always been able to dodge most of the sickness bullets when they have been flying around and the only time that I have really gotten unwell in the past five years was because of my IBS, which I have also managed really well over the last twelve months.
Needless to say, because I am not used to being to being sick. I have never really been a very good sick person. I always forget just how lousey it feels to be sick and then when it happens to me I am always deeply shocked by how crappy and low I am. Being sick sucks so much, it is just the pits. I really don't like my body when it doesn't function very well, it stands in the way of my plans! 
Well there is nothing for it, I must relent and allow my failing system a chance to reboot, but I cannot deny that I am extremely unhappy about it and even more annoyed with that terrible dentist for mucking up my generally 'racehorse strong' constitution, and to think that it is only the beginning of Winter! At this rate who knows what I will be like in a month from now? Fingers crossed that I am getting the worst of it over and done with early! 

Some movies are so good at building tension and a sense of impending doom that they don't even need to have a monster or a boogeyman in sight for you to get the 'heebie jeebies' and I think that sometimes that can be the mark of a truly great movie. I love the horror genre and I cannot deny that sometimes I genuinely thirst for an all out gorefest, which lately has been more than sated by the Ash vs Evil Dead Series on Stan; if you haven't seen it yet make the time - it is comedy-horror gold! But I am getting off track here, what I am trying to say is that just because I enjoy an all out horrorfest in every sense of the word, that does not mean that I do not appreciate the art of making gripping and engaging movies that are slow burning or subtle in their interpretations of horror. 
I know that I often get annoyed about thrillers being marketed as horror movies, because it seems to happen so often these days, but that does not mean that I don't appreciate the art of a well made, edge of your seat, thriller. And there have been so many of these gems over the years that have been sadly overlooked by people that claim to "not be a fan of horror." Just because you don't want to see someone getting disemboweled or decapitated by a chainsaw in a movie, that does not mean that you don't like all horror, especially today with so many movies being incorrectly marketed. 
In my opinion there are actually a large number of horror genres, not just one, and it all usually just get tossed (quite incorrectly) into the one 'horror' basket, which is really disappointing and drives away hordes of non-horror fans who think that it is all the same. 
I am here to help you out, because in my opinion, there are at least 10 horror sub-cateogories that range from face meltingly scary to pre-teen safe, and I have listed them all below. 
Intense Graphic Horror (always rated R 18+)
You wouldn't take your nanna or your kids to these movies, they are gory AF and even some seasoned horror fans struggle with the intensely gross and disturbing footage in them. These are most definitely not for the people that say that they do like horror. Examples: Wyrmwood, Hellraiser, Raw, Dawn of the Dead, Evil Dead, Silent Hill and 28 Days Later.
Horror Comedy 
Can be gory as well, but doesn't have to be. This genre is not taking itself seriously at all and is extremely good fun, as many laughs as scares. Examples: Ghostbusters, What We Do in the Shadows, Zombieland, Shaun of the Dead and Beetlejuice. 
Monster Horror
Creature type action here, some malformed or completely unnatural abomination stalking about with generally ill intent. All of your classic horror icons like vampires, Frankenstein and werewolves would fit in here. Examples: Dracula, IT, American Werewolf in London, Let the Right One In and It Follows.
Supernatural Horror
Ghosts, ghouls, spirits, ouija boards and things that go bump in the night, sometimes the ratings can be as low as PG and there isn't usually much blood because ghosts don't bleed. Examples: Paranormal Activity, The Others, Insidious, The Shining, The Orphanage and The Exorcist.
Slasher 
Axe wielding, chainsaw carrying or knife totting (sometimes inbred) sicko on a rampage. Thin on the ground storyline, tonnes of blood. Examples: The Texas Chainsaw Massacre, Hush, You're Next, Scream and Sweeney Todd.
Torture Porn Horror (always rated R 18+) 
Slasher gone wild or weird arse experiments and long torture scenes with lots of bits getting sliced off people in the name of experimental surgery. Not for the faint hearted and generally my least favourite type of horror, often banned in certain countries. Examples: The Human Centipede, Martyrs, Saw and Hostel. 
Science Fiction Horror
Usually set in space or on another planet, generally has aliens in it but not always and often has an R rating because it can sometimes be quite graphic in content. Examples: Alien, A Quiet Place, Event Horizon, The Thing, Annihilation, Cloverfield and Under the Skin.
Thriller/Psychological Horror
Just about always incorrectly marketed as horror and is often rated M or MA 15+, generally uses more subtle and atmospheric forms of fear to scare and can be crime based. Examples: Get Out, Don't Breathe, The Visit, The Silence of the Lambs, Rosemary's Baby and Psycho. 
Art House Horror 
What the fuck is going on here? Weird, sometimes violent and more often than not utterly indescribable. A lot of unfulfilling endings, creepiness out the wazoo and confusing interludes. Examples: Kill List, Creep, Suspiria, A Field in England, The Skin I Live In and The Wailing.
Intense Slow Burner Horror
Increasing states of paranoia and dread, not a lot actually happens on screen and the horror is usually implied. Can be PG rated and is generally very subtle and left open ended. Examples: It Comes At Night, Here Alone, The Jacket and Monsters. 

So, in light of all that, you can now see that dread does come in many, many forms. Horror is most certainly not just one category, but comes in many subtle variations, and that there is more than likely some horror movies that would appeal to just about everyone's taste. You don't have to be a hardcore slasher or gorefest fan to get something out of a gripping and engaging thriller that won't necessarily keep you up at night. Don't be put off by the horror label, it is so often very misleading. 

I am not afraid of the dark. I know of some adults that still find the dark quite terrifying and being severely afraid of the dark is a very real phobia called Nyctophobia. Some researchers, beginning with Sigmund Freud, consider a fear of the dark to be a manifestation of separation anxiety, but to be honest, with most people that I know of, it appears to stem from watching a horror movie or seeing some other scary as all shit 'unknown' thing in the dark that seems to tweak people's fear of the night. 
Unfortunately, at night time it is quite hard to see, so it can allow people's imaginations to run amok. There really is no greater fear than that of the unknown, and when you can't see things properly the unknown can easily transform into a myriad of horrific possibilities. Suddenly a sheet on the clothesline is a ghost, an animal scurrying about is a robber, a tree rubbing against a house is a witch, or a ghoul or a serial killer. Quite often when people say that they are afraid of the dark they are really just afraid of what they cannot see - the unknown, and the possibilities of what it could be masking. 
Night time is exactly like the day time in my mind, in fact for me personally, I generally think that the night has a lot more to offer in many instances. In the evening the noise pollution lessens, the stars come out and generally everyone is a lot more chilled out than they are in the day time. When it gets dark all the naughty children are quiet and sleeping, everything looks prettier in candlelight and no-one judges you for watching a movie marathon. Another night time plus is the moon, which is constantly changing and far more interesting and observable than the sun, which looks pretty much the same every single day and is impossible to look at because it burns your eyes out of their sockets if you try; now what's to like about that?
​I think that when you live out of town, you kind of have to make your peace with the darkness. When we are facing the dark side of the moon out here in Enfield, it is black and I mean complete and total darkness. You can struggle to see your own hand in front of your face on nights like that, and I have spent many dark evenings on the porch listening to the sounds of the night. Even someone like me who isn't even afraid of the dark can appreciate how easily one's mind can run away with itself if you let it when it is really dark.
There a lot of nocturnal animals scooting around in the dark out here and I have spotted foxes, owls, bats, feral cats and even echidnas foraging about in the cool, calm, quiet of the night. It was only this evening that I had a bunch of kangaroos give me a start when I was taking the recycling out and didn't see them until I almost stood on one of them. But there is nothing scary about a few animals going about their business so none of those nocturnal activities has made me love the night any less. 
Nope, I am not scared of the dark. There are far more scary things in this world than the dark that's for sure, and a lot of those things are very comfortable in the daytime. If anything that I consider to be 'scary' was going to try and get me I would rather that it came for me at night time anyway because it so much easier to hide at night, and I actually feel safer with better hiding options.
There are way too many cool things about the night to not love it completely, but if you do suffer from Nyctophobia, then I deeply sympathise, and I also suggest a total avoidance of horror movies and a really good night light. 

One thing that I have learnt, albeit rather painfully, to accept over the years is that money comes and money goes, and that there is absolutely no point in getting stressed out when everything expensive seems to happen all at once. Sure watching all of you hard earned savings slip through your fingers isn't the most enjoyable thing to endure, but it happens and that is what savings are for - for a rainy day. 
These things have happened before and they will most definitely happen again as well, and no amount of worry has ever made any money problems magically subside. Worrying about money is about as fruitful as trying to dig a hole in the ground with the power of your mind, in other words it is a mentally exhausting and utterly useless kind of worry.
However, regardless of how zen you may feel about money issues or how easily you relinquish the control of your cash flow,  every now and then we all still get caught up in a little financial hardship that makes us feel shitty, a tad destitute and just flatout broke. 
This week has been one of those weeks for me. I have experienced a serious drain on my financial resources, and it has made it really difficult for me to feel happy and excited about being on holidays because I am flat broke. I actually think that I was just blindsided by the events of today and now I have to make my peace with it.
It all started when I took my car in to have a simple and routine wheel balance and alignment done, and then it turned out that I needed four new tyres as well. Right, well there goes another $600 dollars, not to mention the termite inspector that came out yesterday and cost me $220, and I also had to find the money to lock in our New Zealand holiday this week which meant juggling and draining accounts to no end. Oh and my rego was in the letter box when I got home as well, and I got a text from the dentist to book in for a routine clean and scale and another one from my GP to go and have my lady bits inspected, and there's a passport renewal sitting on my desk and....and.....and. You know how it goes, when it rains it pours and there is nothing that you can do about it. 
However, on the bright and exceptionally zen side of it all, I now have a safe and smooth car to drive around in, I have an incredibly fun holiday to New Zealand planned with my family to look forward to, I don't have termites, my teeth are going to get a good clean and having my lady bits checked will offer some peace of mind. So, yeah I am broke, but for good reason and purpose. I am not wasting money or resources, and now because I am so broke then I have no choice but to stay at home for the rest of the break and watch movies and read books all day long...oh dear...poor me!
This sudden lack of funds could actually turn out to be a big blessing in disguise, and an excuse for me to batter down the hatches and not leave Enfield for days on end, hmmm....I can really make this work for me, I sense some B grade horror movie marathons coming my way!

One of the things that I love most about living where I do is that there is always some kind of free event or entertainment that can be accessed without having to travel very far. With only an hour to travel to Melbourne, the Surf Coast or the Grampians, I have perfect access to almost any type of activity that I choose to partake in, and over the last few weeks there has been no shortage of opportunities.
In particular, Ballarat and the surrounding rural areas have had a bevy of free events that has kept me more than busy and also highly entertained. Last weekend The Ballarat Begonia Festival was on, which is always an excellent and free extravaganza of all things garden related. And last night the town celebrated its second White Night event, which was again really engaging and gathered a massive and diverse crowd of enthusiasts.  
Yesterday I hit the road to check out the Golden Plains Shire Arts Trail, which showcases local artists and their works throughout the Golden Plains region. Turns out that there are dozens of very talented artists right on my doorstep and within a 25 kilometre radius of our home I viewed pieces from so many different artists covering so many mediums, including painting, photography, quilting, jewellery making, leathering, garden sculpture, ceramics, nature art, watercolor painting and sketching. Amazing! I was so impressed with the standard of work that I saw, and it was really nice to have a chat with the artists about their pieces as well. 
I love it when a community comes together to share their passions, their hard work and their knowledge, and it is refreshing to be able to attend events without feeling like you need to spend a whole lot of money. Nothing much comes for free anymore and it is nice to know that even when you're seriously broke that you can still get a bit of culture into your life.
​Anyone that knows anything about me already knows that I sure do love a good cheap thrill!

It's that time again, the time for me to unleash my viewing loves and loathes for the year of 2017. In total, I watched 279 movies and 62 TV series in 2017, so yeah, it is fair to say that I have a robust addiction to entertainment and that I have a fairly good idea of what is out there.
My biggest undertaking for the year was a rewatch of the entire Lost Series, 121 episodes in total, and although it took me the better part of the entire year to get through, it was worth the effort. Next to the Twin Peaks Reboot, Lost was the next biggest mind fuck of the year for me.
I must say that the bar raises every single year for me because movies and TV are constantly improving in quality and there is a never ending stream of excellent viewing to be had. That makes it a lot harder for me to discern the best,  but also a lot more enjoyable in the long run.
However, without further ado, here are my picks for the best and worst of 2017, my full reviews of these movies can be found on their corresponding genre lists. 
BEST MOVIES OF 2017:

• IT  - Horror  4.5 Chilli Peppers
• A Ghost Story - Art House 4.5 Chilli Peppers
• Mother! - Challenging 4.5 Chilli Peppers
• Blade Runner 2049 - Science Fiction 4.5 Chilli Peppers
• Baby Driver - Action 4 Chilli Peppers
• Dunkirk - War 4 Chilli Peppers
• Guardians of the Galaxy Vol 2 - Fantasy 4 Chilli Peppers
• Logan - Super 4 Chilli Peppers
• Get Out - Horror 3.5 Chilli Peppers
• A Dark Song - Horror 3.5 Chilli Peppers
• T2 - Trainspotting - Drama 3.5 Chilli Peppers
• Logan Lucky - Action/Comedy 3.5 Chilli Peppers

BEST CATCH UP MOVIES OF 2017: (Movies released before 2017 that I finally saw in 2017)

• La Grande Bellezza (The Great Beauty) - Foreign 5 Chilli Peppers (Hall of Fame)
• Manchester by the Sea - Drama 5 Chilli Peppers (Hall of Fame)
• Moonlight - Drama 4.5 Chilli Peppers
• Arrival - Science Fiction 4.5  Chilli Peppers
• Nocturnal Animals  -Drama 4.5  Chilli Peppers
• Hidden Figures - Drama 4  Chilli Peppers
• Moana - Kid Friendly 4  Chilli Peppers
• The Edge of Seventeen -Comedy 4 Chilli Peppers
• The Conjuring 2 - Horror 4 Chilli Peppers
• Captain Fantastic - Drama 4 Chilli Peppers
• Samson and Delilah - Gritty 4 Chilli Peppers
• The House of the Devil - Horror 3.5 Chilli Peppers
• The Mermaid - Foreign/ Fantasy 3.5 Chilli Peppers

WORST MOVIES OF 2017:

• Kong: Skull Island - Fantasy 2 Chilli Peppers
• The Great Wall - Action/ Fantasy 1.5 Chilli Peppers
• The Ghost in the Shell - Science Fiction 1.5 Chilli Peppers
• A Cure for Wellness - Horror 1.5 Chilli Peppers
• Loving - Drama 1.5 Chilli Peppers
• Valerian and the City of a 1,000 Planets - Science Fiction 1.5 Chilli Peppers
• Baywatch - Comedy 1.5 Chilli Peppers
• Yoga Hosers  -Comedy 1 Chilli Pepper
• The Bye Bye Man  - Horror 0 Chilli Peppers
• The Greasy Strangler - Art House 0 Chilli Peppers

BEST TV SERIES 2017:

• Big Little Lies - Drama 5 Chilli Peppers
• The Handmaid's Tale - Drama/ Fantasy 5 Chilli Peppers
• American Gods - Horror/ Fantasy 5 Chilli Peppers
• Atlanta - Drama 4.5 Chilli Peppers 
• Godless - Western 4.5 Chilli Peppers
• Game of Thrones S7  - Fantasy 4.5 Chilli Peppers
• Stranger Things S2 - Science Fiction 4.5 Chilli Peppers
• Twin Peaks Reboot - Art House 4 Chilli Peppers 
• Mozart in the Jungle - Drama 4 Chili Peppers 
• Alias Grace - Historical Drama 4 Chilli Peppers 
• AHS - Cult - Horror 4 Chilli Peppers
• Peaky Blinders S4 - Historical Drama 4 Chilli Peppers
• Better Things - Comedy 4 Chilli Peppers
• A-Typical - Drama 3.5 Chilli Peppers
• Girls - Final Season - Drama 3.5 Chilli Peppers
• The Sinner - Mystery/Drama 3.5 Chilli Peppers

As far as bad TV series go, well I was so busy watching really high quality TV that I managed to miss all of the shit this year, so I'm not even putting in a category for that. To be honest, I think that this year may have been one of the best of years for quality TV that I have ever known, which fills me with a lot of hope for 2018. 
Hopefully you will find something on my lists that you haven't seen yet and will now go and see on my recommendation. Also, you now know what to avoid like the plague if you should have the misfortune of coming across it.
I hope that the holiday period is being kind to you all, happy viewing!

IT
Release Date: 2017
Rating: R 18+
Running Time: 135 mins 
A supernatural horror directed by Andy Muschietti and based on the highly successful 1986 novel of the same name by Stephen King. Clearly audiences are thirsting for excellent retro horror tales because IT swiftly became the highest grossing horror film of all time and the third highest grossing R rated movie of all time. 
It's 1988 in a small American town called Derry and something insidious is lurking in the sewers; an ancient evil that feeds on the fears of children and presents itself as a clown called Pennywise. Seemingly invisible to adults, Pennywise starts to abduct the children of Derry, and turns its sights on a tight group of friends called The Losers Club. 
With all of the terrific friendship dynamics  and comradery of The Goonies, Stranger Things and Stand By Me  and all of the creepiness of a James Wan horror, IT has a formula that works on so many levels. Not only is there a creepy as all shit clown torturing the children, but all of the adults in Derry seem to be rather unpleasant as well which adds another layer of turmoil to this already emotionally affecting tale. 
IT is most definitely the best horror movie to come out of 2017. The acting is on point, with Bill Skarsgard delivering one of the most memorably disturbing horror characters of all time in Pennywise. He is however exceptionally well supported by a young and fresh faced cast who are all bringing their A game here as well, with notable performances being delivered by Finn Wolfhard, Sophia Lillis, Nicholas Hamilton and Jeremy Ray Taylor.
The visuals are certainly dark, dreadful and nightmarish; but the coming of age story that is playing in the background is not at all drowned out by the grim effects, which was really pleasing to see. IT is a true horror gem and a must see movie for fans of quality horror.
FINAL SAY: We all float down here. 
4.5 Chilli Peppers ​

Today, Craig and I are enjoying our 23rd wedding anniversary. Are we off to do something whirlwind, spectacular and insanely romantic? No, we are not, and I am totally cool with that. A 23rd wedding anniversary is not really one of the big ones, and in my mind it hardly constitutes an enormous hoo-ha. Craig and I are not exactly known for our  'let's go out and paint the town red' attitudes at the best of times; we are however known as the people that leave events first and prefer to be around each other more than anyone else, and perhaps in that common and very unsocial ground that we like to tread together, lies the key to a long and prosperous marriage. Whatever the strange glue is that holds us together, it works and it does not appear to have lost any of its adhesive abilities over the past 23 years that we have been married to each other. 
This morning we just slept in and then spent the morning chatting over long coffees and a very late breakfast on the deck in the glorious morning sunshine. The small luxuries are most certainly the things that we like to celebrate together, and sleep-ins and late breakfasts are most definitely small luxuries to us. Just being together and being happy is a luxury if I am being completely honest, so many people will never know a love like ours and for all of its complications and intricacies, we really do have something wonderful.
We have truly created a mighty fine lives for ourselves together over our combined years of blood, sweat and tears. I have put more effort into my relationship with Craig than I have put into anything else in my life, and I wouldn't change a thing; Craig has been the most rewarding thing that I have ever invested my time and effort into. 
Craig is most definitely my very best friend in the entire world and although I love my friends dearly, Craig is my go-to guy on all fronts. No-one makes me want to do better, be better and try harder than he does. No-one has stood by me when the chips were down like he has, no-one has loved me in spite of all of my idiosyncratic shit like he has, and no-one knows and accepts all of my weirdness like he does; and I doubt that anyone else ever could have. 
Like all great romances, we have weathered the best of times and the worst of times together. We have loved each other harder than any couple could ever love and we have also hated each other more than any couple ever should as well; because really loving someone truly is the agony and the ecstasy. It is about accepting the sunshine but also welcoming the rain. It is about loving all of the beauty and all of the ugly bits as well, it's about being vulnerable and brave all at once. It's the guts and the gizzards, the nitty gritty parts, it's about every single bit of yourself seeing every single bit of someone else.
It's completely raw and utterly compelling, it's frustrating and intriguing and the best part of all is that it just keeps on evolving as you grow and change together - side by side and hand in hand. After 23 years of loving my man, I can honestly say that I love him more now than I did on the day that I said 'I do' 23 years ago, and I think that that may the best thing of all, the fact that it just keeps getting better and better all of the time.