Said you say
You wanna be alone
But someone loves you more than you know
Breath slow
'Cause you don't know
You don't know
'Cause you don't know
All the things that could set you free
Like embracing me....

No, unfortunately I didn't write those beautiful words, they are from the song Embracing Me by Safia which happens to be one of my favourite songs. I often think of those lyrics when I need a bit of healing or comfort. I recall all of the really great embraces that I have had in my lifetime and how great they all made me feel. Some of those hugs came from my husband and children, some from my parents, some from my friends and some days I have even embraced myself. 
Embracing yourself looks a little different than just stretching out your arms and wrapping them around yourself, although this too can offer a great deal of comfort when the need arises. But the comfort that I am talking about is when you embrace yourself with kindness and pleasure. Still not sure what I mean? 
Well, if you want to embrace yourself physically try these things:

• Go for a morning walk
• Hug someone for a longer than usual length of time
• Drink a glass of lemon water or some good quality herbal tea
• Stretch for 10 minutes or do yoga
• Eat a colourful plant based meal
• Take a hot bath or a cool shower
• Immerse yourself in the sun
• Apply a face mask
• Get a massage 

To embrace yourself mentally try these options:

• Read a book
• Clean out your wardrobe
• Listen to a podcast
• Write in your journal
• Do brain training or brain gym
• Plan a gathering or dinner party
• Watch a TED talk or a documentary
• Play a video game
• Try something new
• Do a puzzle
• Rearrange a room on your house

And to embrace yourself spiritually give these a try:

• Meditate
• Watch a sunrise, sunset or starry sky. 
• Sit quietly in nature
• Connect to someone you miss
• Read or write poetry
• Pray, visualise or contemplate
• Have a laugh with friends

I think you may be getting the idea at this point. And time and time again I have proven myself to be a hedonist aka pleasure seeker in this life.  And lets be honest, life is challenging and demanding and mostly unpredictable so why wouldn't you take some time to embrace the really good stuff that makes you feel more alive? And remember, if there is no-one else around for you to embrace, just embrace yourself- mind, body and soul. 

​​CHASING AMY 
Release Date: 1997
Rating: MA 15+
Running Time: 113 mins 
The movie that 'Silent Bob' broke his silence for. It could be seen as a bit dated these days, but when it was released, Chasing Amy had a fresh voice about the jealousies and insecurities that ruin good relationships. Written and directed by Kevin Smith (Silent Bob), Chasing Amy won two Independent Spirit Awards in 1998 and was generally received with favourable critic reviews. 
Comic book authors Banky (Jason Lee) and Holden (Ben Affleck) have been best buddies for over 20 years, but the arrival of a high spirited lesbian named Alyssa Jones (Joey Lauren Adams) threatens their friendship when Holden falls for her. Holden finds that his feelings are put to the test, not only by Banky who desperately wants Alyssa gone, but also by Alyssa's checkered and promiscuous past. 
This a great story about young people attempting to find themselves whilst trying to deal with their baggage and hang ups. I really enjoyed this movie because love does come in all kinds of packages, and some of them aren't very neat or pretty. 
FINAL SAY: So, I've spent every day since then chasing Amy. 
3.5 Chilli Peppers

It's no secret that everyone loves a big block bluster movie or even a sleeper hit or some kind of movie that is mainstream and easy and people have heard about it through word of mouth. These types of films can be great and I cannot deny that I really adore it when a movie becomes a sleeper hit in particular. However, there are so many fabulous movies that just slip thought the cracks of people's viewing and get missed all together because not enough people are talking about them.
Well, I am talking about them, constantly! More than likely annoyingly to a lot of people. I would recommend movies to people at last a dozen or more times a week and often people will say things to me like "I haven't even heard of that movie" or "Really? I thought that film looked a bit weird/ strange/ arty / scary for me to see." And it honestly kills me because a huge number of movies that never get seen are absolutely gold, some of the best and they not only deserve to be talked about,  they most definitely deserve to be seen as well.  
Below I have listed my top 10 'You Really Should Be Talking About This Film - and Probably Will Be After You Watch it' for each genre on Spicywatch.com. These are films that are very deserving of your time and attention and in my opinion (for what it's worth) definitely should've gotten a lot more attention than they did. They are not block busters or sleeper hits, they are mostly films that flew under the radar, which means that you could easily have missed them but you really shouldn't have. They are not new, in fact many are old and could probably be streamed on many different platforms for free these days. 
Full reviews can be found on the genre lists should you require more information.
Happy viewing!
DRAMA:

1. Ingrid Goes West 
2. Jungle 
3. Youth 
4. Locke
5. Short Term 12 
6. Don Jon 
7. Eighth Grade 
8. Perfume: The Story of a Murderer
9. Brothers 
10. The Station Agent

​HORROR:

1. The Vigil
2. The Lodge
3. Saint Maud
4. Mandy 
5. Frailty
6. Here Alone
7. A Dark Song
8. The House of the Devil
9. Creep
10. Hell House LLC

ACTION/CRIME/WAR:

1. Uncut Gems
2. The King
3. Good Time
4. The Bad Batch
5. Prisoners
6. End of Watch 
7. Glory
8. Children of Men
9. The Thin Red Line
10. Blood Simple

COMEDY:

1. Instant Family
2. Fighting With My Family
3. The Breaker Upperers
4. Game Night
5. Spy
6. The Grand Seduction
7. In Bruges
8. Son of Rambow
9. Kung Pow! Enter the Fist!
10. Tucker and Dale vs Evil

SCIENCE FICTION/ FANTASY:

1. Save Yourselves!
2. Predestination 
3. Moon
4. Upgrade
5. The Endless
6. Melancholia
7. Ex Machina
8. Under the Skin
9. These Final Hours
10. Sunshine 

ART HOUSE/ MUSICAL/ INTERNATIONAL:

1. The Great Beauty
2. Me and You and Everyone We Know 
3. Once
4. A Ghost Story
5. Black is King 
6. Sightseers
7. Somewhere
8. 20,000 Days on Earth
9. Kung Fu Hustle 
10. Only Lovers Left Alive 

GRITTY/ DOCO/ CHALLENGING

1. Swallow
2. The Nightingale
3. The Tale
4. Chasing Coral
5. The Weight of Elephants
6. Tyrannosaur
7. Dogtooth
8. Metal Skin
9. Birth
10. Fishtank

ROMANCE/ MATTERS OF THE HEART:

1. Film Stars Don't Die in Liverpool
2. Blue Jay
3. What If
4. Man Up
5. The One I Love
6. Bright Star
7. Labor Day
8. Ruby Sparks
9. Chasing Amy
10. Your Sister's Sister

KID FRIENDLY:

1. The Willoughbys
2. Klaus
3. Isle of Dogs
4. The Little Prince
5. Kubo and the Two Strings
6. The Boy and The Beast
7. Paranorman
8. 9
9. Hoodwinked!
10. Hugo 

Spicywatch.com has just celebrated its seventh birthday! And how she has grown over the years from a humble dozen or so movies reviews when I first launched her in May 2014 to the massive 873 reviews that she now has under her belt. In the 7 years that Spicywatch has been on the internet I have had over 100,000 hits and on average, good old Spicywatch manages to rustle  up around 2500- 6500 readers a month.
So naturally, I had to celebrate the wonderful and joyful occasion of Spicywatch's 7th birthday, especially since last year I couldn't really do anything significant due to COVID-19.  So in the spirit of all things seven, I asked my guests to investigate the 7 Deadly Sins of gluttony, greed, sloth, wrath, pride, lust and envy and then choose their favourite clips from any or all of those categories to share. 
The event was a small but meaningful gathering and everyone had clearly done their research because we traversed the genres like never before. To give you some idea of the range of the movies that had a clip in the mix, check out this movie list of just some that I can recall from last night's line up. 
GLUTTONY:

• Mathilda
• Austin Powers 
• Spirited Away
• Chocolat
• Charlie and the Chocolate Factory
• Stand by Me
• The History of the World (Monty Python) 

PRIDE:

• American Psycho 
• Citizen Kane 
• Monty Python - The Holy Grail 
• The Joker 

ENVY:

• Fatal Attraction
• Eyes Wide Shut
• Howl's Moving Castle
• Moulin Rogue 
• Zoolander 
• Black Swan

LUST:

• Death Proof
• The Devil's Advocate 
• What We Do in the Shadows 
• The Witches of Eastwick
• Fatal Attraction 
• Team America 
• American Beauty 

SLOTH:

• Trainspotting
• The Goonies 
• The Big Lebowski
• Avengers: Endgame 

WRATH:

• Raging Bull
• The Shining
• Maleficent
• Office Space 
• The Lighthouse 
• Revolutionary Road
• Punch Drunk Love 
• Brothers 
• Kill Bill Vol 2
• Silver Linings Playbook

GREED:

• The Hobbit 
• There Will Be Blood
• Casino
• The Nightmare Before Christmas 
• Pocahontas 
• The Mummy 
• Marie Antoinette 

Many thanks to the few incredible souls that braved the weather to celebrate Spicywatch's birthday with me and thanks to all of my loyal readers that continue to check in, read my reviews, leave comments and support the growth of my little blog. 

Normally at this time of the year I would have been able to recount all of the wonderful things that I did and the people that I shared my time with throughout the year, and write a really amazing blog post reminiscing about those events; this year however - not so much! To say that 2020 was a difficult year would be a massive understatement, but for those of you that are out there reading this, well at least we survived it right?
Equally it was a strange year of cinema to say the least! I cannot deny that the viewing opportunities in 2020 grew wider and faster than anyone (even myself) could possibly have kept up with. However, this year I only watched 185 movies in total, which does sound like a lot but it was actually 30 less than I watched in 2019. This was mainly due to the quality of the films on offer, which in opinion were not nearly as consistently great as they were in 2019 and I found myself wading through a lot mediocre movies this year. 
However, television was a whole other ball game, and I watched 153 television series (some of which were more than one series of catch up as well) which was a lot more TV than I viewed in 2018 or 2019, so it all balances out to the same amount of couch smashing in the end and still translates to me being a serious media addict. 
You will notice that there are a lot of TV series listed below that got 4 chilli peppers or more, certainly more than movies did and that is simply because there were a lot more excellent TV experiences to be had this year. The influx of genuinely high level television in 2020 was literally never ending and because of COVID19 lockdowns across the globe we were given the best TV streaming opportunities that we have ever had before. My 'to see' list is pages long these days as I struggle to keep ahead of the game and the movie reviews that I still need to add to my blog, but alas it is a labour of love and I have enjoyed every moment of media escapism that I have indulged in this year. 
2020, just like 2019 managed to deliver greatness across all genres, for which I am very grateful. The international films, independent films and animated films were amazingly good this year and it was great to see so many excellent films and series from those genres. And so, without further ado....here is my selection for the best viewing experiences of 2020. 
BEST MOVIES (2020 release):
Soul - Kids  5 Chilli Peppers (Hall of Fame)
Borat Subsequent Moviefilm - Comedy 4 Chilli Peppers 
Sound of Metal - Drama 4 Chilli Peppers 
Onward - Kids  4 Chilli Peppers
Black is King - Musical  4 Chilli Peppers
The Vast of Night - Sci-Fi   3.5 Chilli Peppers
The Invisible Man - Horror 3.5 Chilli Peppers 
The Willoughbys - Kids  3.5 Chilli Peppers
His House - Horror 3.5 Chilli Peppers 
Colour Out of Space - Sci -Fi  3.5 Chilli Peppers
Da 5 Bloods - War 3.5 Chilli Peppers
Enola Holmes  - Crime 3.5 Chilli Peppers
Deadwood: The Movie - Crime 3.5 Chilli Peppers
Save Yourselves! - Sci-Fi/ Comedy   3.5 Chilli Peppers

2020 HONOURABLE MENTIONS:
The Platform - Gritty/ International  3 Chilli Peppers
Swallow - Gritty 3 Chilli Peppers
Palm Springs -  Romance/ Comedy 3 Chilli Peppers 
Vivarium - Sci-Fi 3 Chilli Peppers 
#Alive - Horror 3 Chilli Peppers
American Murder: The Family Next Door - Doco 3 Chilli Peppers 
Relic - Horror 3 Chilli Peppers 

Here are my top recommendations for pre-2020 releases that I didn't see until 2020:
1917 - War 5 Chilli Peppers (Hall of Fame) 
Parasite - International 4.5 Chilli Peppers 
Shadow - International 4.5 Chilli Peppers
The Nightingale - Gritty  4 Chilli Peppers
Uncut Gems - Crime 4 Chilli Peppers
The Lighthouse - Art House  4 Chilli Peppers
The Farewell - Drama 4 Chilli Peppers 
Burning - International 3.5 Chilli Peppers
Ford v Ferrari - Drama 3.5 Chilli Peppers 
Chasing Coral - Doco  3.5 Chilli Peppers
The Peanut Butter Falcon - Drama 3.5 Chilli Peppers 
Mid90s - Drama   3.5 Chilli Peppers
Zombieland 2: Double tap - Horror 3.5 Chilli Peppers
Dr Sleep - Horror 3.5 Chilli Peppers 
Rocketman - Musical  3.5 Chilli Peppers
The Gentlemen - Crime 3.5 Chilli Peppers
El Camino: A Breaking Bad Movie - Crime  3.5 Chilli Peppers
Hail Satan? - Doco  3.5 Chilli Peppers
3 Identical Strangers - Doco  3.5 Chilli Peppers
Mystify: Michael Hutchence - Doco  3.5 Chilli Peppers
The Lodge - Horror 3 Chilli Peppers
The Night Eats the World - Horror 3 Chilli Peppers

BEST TELEVISION SERIES 2020:
Succession S2 -  Drama 5 Chilli Peppers
Ozark S3 - Crime 5 Chilli Peppers
Lovecraft Country - Horror 5 Chilli Peppers
This Country S3 - Comedy 5 Chilli Peppers
Raised by Wolves - Sci- Fi 4.5 Chilli Peppers
The Queen's Gambit - Drama 4.5 Chilli Peppers
The Mandalorian - Sci-Fi 4.5 Chilli Peppers 
Better Call Saul S5 - Crime 4.5 Chilli Peppers 
Morning Wars - Drama 4.5 Chilli Peppers 
I May Destroy You - Drama 4.5 Chilli Peppers 
DEVS - Sci-Fi  4 Chilli Peppers 
The Magicians S5 - Sci-Fi 4 Chilli Peppers
The Great - Period Drama 4 Chilli Peppers 
What We Do in the Shadows S2 - Horror/Comedy 4 Chilli Peppers
Mythic Quest - Comedy/Drama 4 Chilli Peppers
Kidding S2 - Art House 4 Chilli Peppers
Awkwafina is Nora from Queens - Comedy 4 Chilli Peppers
The Boys S2 - Super 4 Chilli Peppers
Ramy S2 - Comedy/ Drama 4 Chilli Peppers
The Haunting of Bly Manor -  Horror 4 Chilli Peppers
The Undoing - Drama 4 Chilli Peppers
Wayne - Crime/ Comedy 4 Chilli Peppers
Unorthodox - Drama 4 Chilli Peppers
​It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia S14 - Comedy 4 Chilli Peppers
High Fidelity - Drama 4 Chilli Peppers

2020 TV HONOURABLE MENTIONS: ​
Ratched - Thriller  3.5 Chilli Peppers 
SEE - Sci- Fi  3.5 Chilli Peppers 
Avenue 5 - Sci-Fi/ Comedy  3 Chilli Peppers 
Dave - Comedy  3 Chilli Peppers
The Servant - Thriller  3 Chilli Peppers
 The Umbrella Academy S2- Fantasy 3 Chilli Peppers
The Third Day - Thriller  3 Chilli Peppers 
After Life S2 - Comedy  3 Chilli Peppers 
Killing Eve S3 - Crime  3 Chilli Peppers 
Breeders - Comedy  3.5 Chilli Peppers 

We all know that 2020 has been a rather tepid year when it comes to blockbuster movies, and for good reason. Who in their right mind would want to launch their huge box office smash hit movie when every cinema in the world is closed due to coronavirus restrictions? Clearly the smart thing to do is to just  hold off until everything returns to normal, and a lot of big budget film makers that are fortunate enough to have the equity to do that have done that. However, a lot of other smaller or independent film makers have been forced to sell the rights to their movies to streaming services in order to pay the bills - so to speak. What this has meant for us as viewers is access to a large number of sleeper hits that we have been able to watch in our own homes. 
So what is a sleeper hit? In the entertainment industry a sleeper hit is any movie, TV series, music release or video game that is usually not very successful upon first release and then gains momentum and becomes a huge success down the track. Sleeper hits often have little promotion or lack a successful launch (this often happens with films that go directly to streaming) but then they builds a reputation through critic reviews and attention which increases their overall exposure. Eventually the unknown form of entertainment becomes very popular because it has gained outside attention for being very good, original or controversial.
Some great examples of past sleeper hit movies that started out small and then deservingly gained a large following are:

• Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon - International/ Action
• Slumdog Millionaire - Romance/ Drama
•  Juno - Drama
• Saw - Horror 
• My Big Fat Greek Wedding - Comedy/ Romance 
• Napoleon Dynamite - Comedy 
• Paranormal Activity - Horror 
• The Greatest Showman - Musical 

For someone like me who goes to the movies to see pretty much everything, being able to access high quality new release cinema at home has been an appreciated and well utilised privilege, and I have to say that I have seen some excellent movies through my streaming services this year that I definitely would have gone to the cinema and paid good money to have seen if coronavirus restrictions weren't in place.
And so without further ado, here is my list of the top ten movies that have streamed this year that I would not only recommend but also regard as 2020 sleeper hits that are definitely worthy of your time and attention:

1. #Alive - International/ Horror (Netflix) 
2. Enola Holmes - Crime/ Action (Netflix) 
3. Black is King - Music (Disney) 
4. His House - Horror (Netflix) 
5. Relic - Horror (Stan) 
6. Da 5 Bloods - War (Netflix) 
7. The Willoughbys - Kids (Netflix) 
8. The Platform - International/ Thriller (Netflix) 
9. Swallow - Thriller (Stan) 
10. Palm Springs - Romance (Prime) 

I have found a new app that I am completely obsessed with. It's called Taste and it's all about movies and TV. This has proven to be dangerous for my health over the last two days because I am struggling to put it down. Seriously, this may be the most addictive thing that I have ever downloaded in my life and it's not a good thing. 
Taste presents you with a range of movies and/ or TV programs for you to endlessly scroll through. You rate them as you go if you have already seen them and you can add things that interest you to a folder to watch later. The more that you rate and like things, the more data that the app collects about what you like and the more movies and TV choices it spits out for you. In short, I have fallen down a rabbit hole and I have no idea when I will emerge. 
And on top of the constant scrolling, I have also been alerted to around 100 movies that I have both seen and really enjoyed but have failed to review because they are mostly old and I clearly forgot about their existence until Taste alerted me to the fact that I may wish to watch them. So this now means that on top of my new and unhealthy obsession I also have weeks and weeks of movie reviewing ahead of me to catch up on. Guess what I will be doing over the summer break? Getting my blog up to date and binge watching new material! Might be just as well that I can't go away because I have shit loads to do on Spicywatch now. 
However, as much as this has presented me with more work to do my blog, it is (as you all know) a true labour of love that I am not only keen to do but also very excited to undertake as well. I have so much new material to review and so many new things to watch again that have been specifically recommended based on my previous choices, it's pretty cool actually. 
I was just thinking the other day that my movie reviews have been rather scarce this year due the fact that movies haven't exactly been incredible this year  - thanks to COVID-19.  I have watched twice as much TV as movies this year which has drastically impacted on the growth of my Spicywatch genre lists, but this will change all of that by boosting my lists and adding a lot more quality content for my readers to check out.
Winning all around I think, if only I could put the damn Taste app down for more than 30 minutes then I am sure that I would get a lot more reviewing done! Anyway, here is one movie that Taste alerted me to that I had seen and missed reviewing because it was introduced to the world before Spicywatch was. I thought I'd start with this one because it seems to have an appropriate title given my recent movie list circumstances - bloody infinite! 

NICK AND NORAH'S INFINITE PLAYLIST
Release Date: 2008
Rating: M 
Running Time: 90 mins
A sweet coming of age romantic comedy directed by Peter Sollett, written by Lorene Scafaria and based on the novel of the same name by Rachel Cohn and David Levithan. With just the right speckling of humour and drama, this romance really hit an unexpected high note for me. 
Nick (Michael Cera) is a high school student and member of the Queercore band The Jerk Offs.  He becomes involved with college bound Norah (Kat Dennings), a friend of his own bitchy ex-girlfriend Tris when she asks him to pose as her boyfriend for a few minutes in an attempt to make her own ex-boyfriend jealous. Soon the two are bonding over playlist music and inventing new ways to avoid their troubled pasts and friends. 
Hardly a revelation in script writing or unique plot lines, however in spite of all of that there is still something genuinely sweet about this film that I really enjoyed. And besides, any movie that brings people together over a mutual love of music is always going to be a winner for me. 
FINAL SAY: If anyone is getting raped in that van, it'll be a guy. 
3 Chilli Peppers ​

When you're regularly asked to social distance, stay at home and keep away from crowds of people it can become pretty easy to feel completely disconnected from the rest of the world. All of your travel plans have been cancelled, concerts and live performances aren't even an option and all of your best laid plans for the last three months have come to a grinding halt, and let's be honest about it, it doesn't really feel that great does it? Some days it can be really hard to find the joy when you're just doing the same monotonous things, feeling cut off from everyone and craving more physical contact.  
When these kinds of feelings last for long periods of time, people can start to feel downright depressed, which is the last thing that anyone needs to be feeling when we are already in the midst of a pandemic. It's all stressful, worrying and uncomfortable enough thanks, no one needs to be feeling depressed on top of it all and that's why maintaining human connection is more important than ever as we navigate these difficult times. 
Here are some sure fire ways to make sure that you are staying connected with the world whilst also maintaining a sense of inner peace of harmony. 
Adapt: Try to keep doing as many of the things that you were doing before COVID-19 hit, just adapt them. Workout online instead of at the gym, go for long walks or ride your bike in nature as a form of exercise, schedule your eating times to happen at the same time as a friend so that you're still socialising, have movie nights with small groups in your home instead of going to the cinema. Get creative with how you can socialise in small groups in your own home eg. have themed dinner party nights, trivia nights, movie nights, cooking classes, game nights or home spa treatments. These will give you something to look forward to and keep you socialising in small groups in safe spaces. 
Touch: Touch is such a rich source of affirmation, security and safety and many of us not only crave it but actually need it. This is probably one of the toughest things for single people to combat during a pandemic, because you just can't go around hugging everyone when you run the possibility of either contracting or passing along a deadly virus, not to mention it's really just generally not okay. In order to counterbalance the loss of the comfort that comes from hugs and physical closeness psychologists recommend a daily call to someone in the form of a Skype, Zoom, Facetime or Meets app situation. Something face to face and regular will help to alleviate the loneliness and feelings of isolation for people that are alone, and for everyone else - well take some comfort in the fabulousness of your relationships and hug the people in your home for longer, kiss your partner more often and just fully enjoy being close to people when you can be safely. 
Self talk: Focus your energies and your internal dialogue around what you can control and not on what you can't. Instead of saying to yourself 'how long will this all last for?' learn to ask yourself this important question every day:
What do I need today in order to feel satisfied, safe and connected? 
Spend more time exploring your own wants, needs and requirements and less time on the 'what if's' around this whole pandemic experience. By learning to attend to your own needs, you will find more joy, a sense of inner peace and maybe even spark some interest in a new activity or hobby to fill in your free time in satisfying and self-connecting ways. 
Talk It Out: If you are feeling anxious, worried or fearful, that's okay - you're not alone! You are allowed to feel those things and you should share those thoughts with others. By talking out your concerns with friends or family, whether it's face to face or over the phone you will reduce your stress levels and give people an awareness about what is going on for you. A reduction in socialisation and connection is genuinely difficult for many people and being honest about your emotions and reaching out to others will definitely build stronger connections and help to alleviate anxiety. 
Get Moving: Whether you like to exercise or not is not really relevant because the science is in! And the fact of the matter is that exercising releases heaps of feel good chemicals like dopamine, endorphins and serotonin, and they lift your mood, reduce your stress and they're completely free as well. You can't argue with that now can you? Exercise is a great way to meet up with friends, get some fresh air  and sunshine into your system and kick off those feel good chemicals, so try to incorporate at least 30 minutes of exercise into your routine a day. It may not always connect you with others, but you will definitely feel better for doing it. 
Be Zen: You know that I love a good meditation, I can't even go a day without it anymore. And there are some kick arse meditation apps out there that are not only great for triggering mindfulness and calm, but are also social and free as well. Check out Insight Timer or Smiling Mind for some inner connection zen time, you won't regret it. 

Everyone would like to find that one special person that they can spend the rest of their days with; well pretty much everyone. I am sure that there probably are completely autonomous people out there who do not crave intimacy or long for a life partner, but when it comes to the average Joe's of the world like myself, well we just want to feel like we can hang out with someone that gets us, loves us for  who we are and ultimately can put up with our shit when we are not at our best. And when you do find someone like that, you are going to want to hang on to them forever. But how do you know for sure that you have actually found 'the one' that you want to spend the rest of your life with?
Well, short answer is that you don't know, not really, not 100%. Okay yes, there are all of those initial fuzzy, glowy, feel good vibes that you get when you first hook up with someone, but you can also get those in short term relationships that turn to shit, so they really aren't the best indication that your relationship has the minerals to be everlasting and lifelong. I think that the only way that you can be somewhat certain in the beginning stages is when you have completely bared your mind, body and soul to a person and they still want in. And this type of baring of the self can take anywhere from 12 months to 20 years to establish (depending on your level of openness) so this is a pretty gradual process, an unfolding if you will. However, generally, anyone that can accept all of your flaws, love you unconditionally and accept you at your sickest, weakest and meanest moments is definitely worth considering as a life partner in my opinion. 
Some couples stay together for years and years and still never really get to know each other very well, in fact this is more common than you might think. However, if both parties can be completely transparent with each other, I believe that this is really good start when it comes to laying a solid lifelong foundation of togetherness. However, just as equally important for longevity is common ground and similar values and ethics, because clearly a smack head and a deeply pious catholic, regardless of their ability to be transparent with each other are not necessarily going to make the best lifelong bedfellows are they? As a couple, you simply must have some ethical consistencies in order to thrive, without this there will never be smooth sailing and it is inevitable that the relationship will come to a conclusion, quite possibly an unpleasant one.  
When all of the initial infatuation and fascination wears away (and it does because humans take things for granted - even really good relationships) if you don't have some common ground, united front and shared values, well honestly, you're gonna be fucked pretty quickly. And when I say common ground I mean something more substantial than both of you being into jasmine green tea. I'm talking ethics and general life philosophy. You don't need to be identical, but on some issues you will need to find common ground to be able to have harmony and longitude in your relationship. 
And differences, well they're going to matter as well and regardless of how charming, attractive and wonderful your partner may be, you're going to need some space from them at times as well. Nothing wrong with sharing loads of quality time together, but the saying too much of a good thing can happen in relationships, so some seperation of time and interests is also important to keep things in balance. I for one would've left my husband years ago if we'd been working, resting and playing together all of the time, love him as dearly as I do,  I don't want to be around him all of the time and our very different interests have ensured that we have both enjoyed some mutually appreciated 'away from each other' time. 
But don't take my word for it, I've only been married for 25 years, what the hell do I know about long term relationships? Jokes, I do actually know a shit load about it and I definitely know that at the heart of it all, there are no guarantees with any of it. You can never be 100% sure that the person you choose to be with now will be the same one that you are going to want to wake next to in 10, 20 or 50 years time. And maybe that uncertainty, that gamble that you take with your own heart, that leap of faith into the unknown, maybe it is just another part of the magic and joy of it all anyway.
I do however know that staying in a meaningful long term relationship takes lots of work and a great deal of compromise and a shit tonnes of your own personal time; and there will be times when it feels like none of the effort is worth the struggle, but trust me when I say that it is. That for every rough day there will be a grand day and for every struggle that you endure together you will become stronger and more aware of each others truths and lives. And as long as one of you is always in there batting for you both to stay together, then odds are that you probably will. Odds are that you'll wake up and look at your perfectly imperfect partner one day and wonder how you could ever manage a day without them, and I suppose that will be the day that you can know for sure that they are  the one that you want; hopefully forever. 

I have in other posts mentioned how I hate it when a movie franchise capitalises on the success of earlier films and starts to roll out endless sequels that are just absolute shit and not a scrap on the original in any way, and look this does happen quite a lot. However, I don't want to tell you about all of the times that Hollywood wasted my time with shithouse sequels, why would I do that when I can tell you about all of the times when they actually got it completely right?
I would much prefer to talk about all of the times that a sequel or trilogy produced something that was just as good as the original - and dare I say it, sometimes even better! Yes, it is true, that some sequels and sometimes trilogies (and even beyond; which is rare but has happened) can be just as good, if not better than, their predecessor offerings. And I have to say that I get mighty excited when things like this happen.
Whenever I enter the cinema to watch a second coming I never, not ever, expect for it to be great. So you can imagine my surprise and delight when they get the formula right and deliver something fabulous all over again. Impossible you say? I think not, check out these incredible feats of cinematic trilogy and sequel genius -no seriously, you should really check them out, they're actually all very good movies!
TERRIFIC TRILOGIES:

• The Godfather: Arguably the best movie trilogy that has ever been made and certainly one of the best that I've ever seen.
• Toy Story: All four of them are great, all four of them! This is so rare that it is literally unheard of. If you've somehow missed these, see them immediately. 
• Lord Of The Rings (Trilogy): I've said it a thousand times, these three movies are epic. All Hale King Jackson! 
• The Hobbit(Trilogy): More Jackson gold, not as good as LOTR, but still epic.
• John Wick: There have been three of these so far, and they just keep getting better and better, and Keanu gets sexier and sexier as well - bonus!
• The Indiana Jones trilogy: Yeah I know that there were four of them, but the first three were the best and you know it too!
• Before Midnight: The final film in the trilogy, with the first two being Before Sunrise and Before Sunset. These are some of the best and most realistic romance films ever made, and each installment gets more involved. 
• Three Colours: Blue, Red and White: These fabulous french/polish language films are loosely based on the three political ideals in the motto of the French republic: liberty, equality, fraternity, and they're all excellent. 

STUNNING SEQUELS: 

• Terminator 2: Judgement Day: The first one was great, but the second one was bad ass, CGI effects heaven in 1991. 
• Aliens: Yep, loved the original Alien with all of my heart, but kick ass Ripley saving the day in Aliens was so damn good!
• Blade Runner 2049: So good, and in my opinion better than the original in storyline. 
• Paddington 2: Probably the best sequel of 2017, it was just so damn adorable!
• The Dark Knight: Heath Ledger's performance elevated the Batman movies to new and great heights- amazing!
• Thor: Ragnarok: Funnier, faster and way more enjoyable than any of the other Thor films. 
• Logan: The Wolverine franchise swan song was so, so good - it made my best of 2017 film list because it's really intelligent and deeply moving.
• Insidious 2: A perfect follow up to the very creepy first offering, some consistently excellent horror film making here. 
• Deadpool 2 - I love the Deadpool movies, they are so naughty and tongue in cheek, they're winners all round for me.
• Creep 2 - More Mark Duplass weirdness! Creep 2 is a really good and consistent follow on to the first Creep film. 
• Kill Bill Vol 2 - Every bit as good as Kill Bill vol 1, I actually liked the second instalment more than the first, but I know that many would argue this with me. 
• Hellboy 2 - The Golden Army: Even better than the first Hellboy, loads more fantastic creatures and heaps of action packed fun. 
• Manon Des Sources: The second installment of the French language movie Jean De Florette is unforgettable material that shouldn't be missed. 
• Avengers: Endgame: A perfect ending to an incredible franchise and the best super sequel that has ever been made. Hall of Fame material!
• Mad Max: Fury Road: This modern take on Mad Max was an unmissable fuel injected adrenaline rush and made my best of 2015 list. 
• T2 Trainspotting: A mature and contemplative revisit to the lads twenty years on, very interesting. 
• The Conjuring 2 - The Enfield Haunting: Totally freaked me out, that bloody nun is scary as all shit! Way more scares than the first Conjuring offering. 
• The Guardians of the Galaxy Vol 2: Just as good as Vol 1 in every way, just as funny, action packed and entertaining. 
• An Inconvenient Sequel: Truth to Power: If you're still in denial about global warming then watch Al Gore's second offering about the subject and get on board with feeling very uncomfortable and worried about the planet. 
• Zombieland: Double Tap: More hack and slash zombie killing with the old gang, what's not to like? 

The Academy Awards (or Oscars) are officially Hollywood's biggest awards 'night of nights.' They serve to award movie makers, directors and actors who have reached a pinnacle of excellence in their careers. To even receive an Oscar nomination is huge deal in Hollywood, and unlike the Golden Globes that celebrate television and film excellence, the Academy Awards are solely focused on recognising achievements of excellence in film.
The categories at the Oscars span much further than acting and directing, and also offer recognition for all of the creative and technical work that goes on behind the scenes when movies are made. From costuming, sound, cinematography, visual effects and cinema shorts, the Academy Awards are the most prestigious and coveted of all of the Hollywood award events, and even though I never miss the Golden Globes, the Screen Actors Guild Awards or the Critics Choice Awards, the Oscars are easily my favourite awards ceremony to watch every year. 
If you should wish to see the Academy Awards ceremony yourself this year, it will be broadcasting live on Channel Seven from 12pm on Monday 10th February, with an encore airing at 7.30pm for those of you who, like myself, will be at work during the day of the ceremony. 
And this year, the Academy Award nominees are as follows:
Best Picture:
“Ford v Ferrari”
“The Irishman”
“Jojo Rabbit”
“Joker”
“Little Women”
“Marriage Story”
“1917”
“Once Upon a Time in Hollywood”
“Parasite”
Lead Actor:
Antonio Banderas, “Pain and Glory”
Leonardo DiCaprio, “Once Upon a Time in Hollywood”
Adam Driver, “Marriage Story”
Joaquin Phoenix, “Joker”
Jonathan Pryce, “The Two Popes”
Lead Actress:
Cynthia Erivo, “Harriet”
Scarlett Johansson, “Marriage Story”
Saoirse Ronan, “Little Women”
Charlize Theron, “Bombshell”
Renee Zellweger, “Judy”
Supporting Actor:
Tom Hanks, “A Beautiful Day in the Neighborhood”
Anthony Hopkins, “The Two Popes”
Al Pacino, “The Irishman”
Joe Pesci, “The Irishman”
Brad Pitt, “Once Upon a Time in Hollywood”
Supporting Actress:
Kathy Bates, “Richard Jewell”
Laura Dern, “Marriage Story”
Scarlett Johansson, “Jojo Rabbit”
Florence Pugh, “Little Women”
Margot Robbie, “Bombshell”
Director:
Martin Scorsese, “The Irishman”
Todd Phillips, “Joker”
Sam Mendes, “1917”
Quentin Tarantino, “Once Upon a Time in Hollywood”
Bong Joon Ho, “Parasite”
Animated Feature:
“How to Train Your Dragon: The Hidden World,” Dean DeBlois
“I Lost My Body,” Jeremy Clapin
“Klaus,” Sergio Pablos
“Missing Link,” Chris Butler
“Toy Story 4,”  Josh Cooley
Animated Short:
“Dcera,” Daria Kashcheeva
“Hair Love,” Matthew A. Cherry
“Kitbull,” Rosana Sullivan
“Memorable,” Bruno Collet
“Sister,” Siqi Song
Adapted Screenplay:
“The Irishman,” Steven Zaillian
“Jojo Rabbit,” Taika Waititi
“Joker,” Todd Phillips, Scott Silver
“Little Women,” Greta Gerwig
“The Two Popes,” Anthony McCarten
Original Screenplay:
“Knives Out,” Rian Johnson
“Marriage Story,” Noah Baumbach
“1917,” Sam Mendes and Krysty Wilson-Cairns
“Once Upon a Time in Hollywood,” Quentin Tarantino
“Parasite,” Bong Joon-ho, Jin Won Han
Cinematography:
“The Irishman,” Rodrigo Prieto
“Joker,” Lawrence Sher
“The Lighthouse,” Jarin Blaschke
“1917,” Roger Deakins
“Once Upon a Time in Hollywood,” Robert Richardson
Best Documentary Feature:
“American Factory,” Julia Rieichert, Steven Bognar
“The Cave,” Feras Fayyad
“The Edge of Democracy,” Petra Costa
“For Sama,” Waad Al-Kateab, Edward Watts
“Honeyland,” Tamara Kotevska, Ljubo Stefanov
Best Documentary Short Subject:
“In the Absence,” Yi Seung-Jun and Gary Byung-Seok Kam
“Learning to Skateboard in a Warzone,” Carol Dysinger
“Life Overtakes Me,” Kristine Samuelson and John Haptas
“St. Louis Superman,” Smriti Mundhra and Sami Khan
“Walk Run Cha-Cha,” Laura Nix
Best Live Action Short Film:
“Brotherhood,” Meryam Joobeur
“Nefta Football Club,” Yves Piat
“The Neighbors’ Window,” Marshall Curry
“Saria,” Bryan Buckley
“A Sister,” Delphine Girard
Best International Feature Film:
“Corpus Christi,” Jan Komasa
“Honeyland,” Tamara Kotevska, Ljubo Stefanov
“Les Miserables,” Ladj Ly
“Pain and Glory,” Pedro Almodovar
“Parasite,” Bong Joon Ho
Film Editing:
“Ford v Ferrari,” Michael McCusker, Andrew Buckland
“The Irishman,” Thelma Schoonmaker
“Jojo Rabbit,” Tom Eagles
“Joker,” Jeff Groth
“Parasite,” Jinmo Yang
Sound Editing:
“Ford v Ferrari,” Don Sylvester
“Joker,” Alan Robert Murray
“1917,” Oliver Tarney, Rachel Tate
“Once Upon a Time in Hollywood,” Wylie Stateman
“Star Wars: The Rise of SkyWalker,” Matthew Wood, David Acord
Sound Mixing:
“Ad Astra”
“Ford v Ferrari”
“Joker”
“1917”
“Once Upon a Time in Hollywood”
Production Design:
“The Irishman,” Bob Shaw and Regina Graves
“Jojo Rabbit,” Ra Vincent and Nora Sopkova
“1917,” Dennis Gassner and Lee Sandales
“Once Upon a Time in Hollywood,” Barbara Ling and Nancy Haigh
“Parasite,” Lee Ha-Jun and Cho Won Woo, Han Ga Ram, and Cho Hee
Original Score:
“Joker,” Hildur Guðnadóttir
“Little Women,” Alexandre Desplat
“Marriage Story,” Randy Newman
“1917,” Thomas Newman
“Star Wars: The Rise of Skywalker,” John Williams
Original Song:
“I Can’t Let You Throw Yourself Away,” “Toy Story 4”
“I’m Gonna Love Me Again,” “Rocketman”
“I’m Standing With You,” “Breakthrough”
“Into the Unknown,” “Frozen 2”
“Stand Up,” “Harriet”
Makeup and Hair:
“Bombshell”
“Joker”
“Judy”
“Maleficent: Mistress of Evil”
“1917”
Costume Design:
”The Irishman,” Sandy Powell, Christopher Peterson
“Jojo Rabbit,” Mayes C. Rubeo
“Joker,” Mark Bridges
“Little Women,” Jacqueline Durran
“Once Upon a Time in Hollywood,” Arianne Phillips
Visual Effects:
“Avengers Endgame”
“The Irishman”
“1917”
“The Lion King”
“Star Wars: The Rise of Skywalker”

I am all for owning and indulging in your guilty pleasures, and come on, let's put it out there...they're only guilty pleasures if you actually feel guilty about them, right? So rather than calling them 'guilty' pleasures let's just call them straight up pleasures, aka the things that you love to indulge in that other people may not (probably won't) know about. And let's be honest about this, we all have them, so there's no point in acting like you don't. And they could be as innocuous as eating chocolate in the bathtub whilst listening to Cindy Lauper CD's or they could be as dangerous as snorting cocaine off the back of a dunny seat everytime that you go to a Melbourne nightclub; whatever your pleasure (and as long as it isn't harming anyone else) I say that it's okay to indulge in your pleasure vices from time to time. 
I find that as I get older, my choice of 'pleasures' has changed substantially, and that's not because I don't have anything that I desire enough to warrant the effort because I most certainly do, but I find that I am much busier and more financially restricted as the time in my life marches on; so what I can afford to indulge in, and also what I can afford the time to indulge in, has altered quite a lot. Perhaps I just have more expensive pleasures than I did say... fifteen years ago, which is probably closer to the truth and that would generally mean that I just can't afford to indulge in them as often as I would like to. 
When I say expensive, I also mean indulgent and I think that, like most of us, there is a certain level of guilt associated with indulging in your pleasures, especially if you know that they are expensive, dangerous or not really considered to be good for your health - hence the title guilty pleasures. However, if there is one thing that I have learnt thus far in this life,  it's that restricting yourself from the things that you really love and genuinely crave is not only extremely cruel, but it's downright oppressive to your soul as well. One must never forget the age old adage - you can't take your riches with you when you die, so you may as well make the most of them while you can. 
Over the years the topic of guilty pleasures has come up from time to time when I have had people around, it is certainly one of the more interesting topics that you can discuss at a dinner party or friendly gathering. As interesting as your own pleasures are to you, I find it way more interesting to hear about the guilty pleasures of others. Other people's pleasure choices can reveal another dimension to their person that you may have completely overlooked, and although I am not going to out anyone here for their specific desires, I have heard some pretty interesting and even salacious pleasure choices that have raised a few eyebrows in the room when they were revealed.
Check out these rippers:

• Staying a work late to use their internet to game.
• Looking at photos of Kamal and listening to him sing - and getting turned on!
• Getting drunk and binge watching bad reality TV.
• Enjoying McDonald's breakfasts regularly. 
• Dancing in the loungeroom to songs from Dirty Dancing or Grease. 
• Stealing luxury pillows from hotels.
• Eating a (free?) handful of grapes or nuts from the produce section of supermarkets. 
• Drinking a whole bottle of good champagne alone.
• Eating raw cake mixture or biscuit dough. 
• Stealing soaps. 
• Watching Steven Seagal movies and loving them. 
• Getting professional massages on your lunch break.
• Following Justin Bieber on Instagram. 
• Watching 'weird topic' porn.
• Reading Mills and Boon novels. 
• Impulse travelling or road tripping. 
• Sunbaking without sunscreen.
• Eating things straight from the jar or drinking out of the carton.
• Smoking joints.
• Squeezing pimples on other people's backs or faces. 
• Not showering on the weekends. 
• Stalking people on social media platforms. 
• Talking to your pet like it's a real person that understands you. 

Some of those were actually mine, but I am not going to tell you which ones...you'll just have to guess! In the meantime, raise a glass to your own (guilty) pleasures, partake in them and explore what gives you genuine and unbridled joy, because life's too short not to indulge in the sillier, simpler and saucier bits and bobs. And, as long as 'it harms none' then I say go in hard and celebrate being alive everyday!

So, the 2020 Golden Globe Nominations have been announced, which will pretty much dictate what I will be watching over my summer break. Yep, I am going to be hitting the couch and the cinema pretty hard over the next few weeks so that I can watch the actual Golden Globe Awards Ceremony live on Arena on January 6th and have some understanding of the content that has been nominated.
As an avid movie addict, I do feel very compelled to see at least 75% of everything nominated before an event of this calibre occurs in order for me to be discerning about whether a movie/program is worthy of the win or not. 
This year there is some really great news for those of you out there that don't like to go the cinema very often because quite a number of the nominated films and television programs are actually available through various streaming networks (which I have indicated below for your viewing ease) which means that you can watch a good swag of them from the comfort of your own couch in preparation for the big event. 
I cannot deny that there does appear to be a couple of incredibly great movies and television series that have been snubbed from the lists here, but this happens every year and I will get around to sharing my personal top pics of the year list very soon, so let's just go with what's been nominated here, and I will talk more about my personal choices for the best of 2019 in the very near future.
So, without further ado, here are the 2020 Golden Globe Nominations - happy viewing!
Best Motion Picture — Drama
1917
The Irishman - Netflix
Joker
Marriage Story - Netflix
The Two Popes - Netflix
Best Motion Picture — Musical or Comedy
Dolemite Is My Name -  Netflix
Jojo Rabbit
Knives Out
Once Upon a Time in Hollywood
Rocketman
Best Foreign-Language Motion Picture
The Farewell
Les Misérables 
Pain and Glory 
Parasite
Portrait of a Lady on Fire
Best Limited Series or TV Movie
Catch-22 - Stan
Chernobyl - HBO
Fosse/Verdon - HBO
The Loudest Voice - Showtime
Unbelievable - Netflix
Best Television Series — Drama
Big Little Lies - HBO
The Crown - Netflix
Killing Eve -  ABC iview or Stan
The Morning Show
Succession - HBO
Best Comedy Series
Fleabag - Amazon Prime
Barry - HBO
The Kominsky Method - Netflix
The Marvelous Mrs. Maisel - Amazon Prime
The Politician - Netflix
Best Motion Picture — Animated
Frozen II
How to Train Your Dragon: The Hidden World
Missing Link
Toy Story 4
The Lion King
Best Director — Motion Picture
Bong Joon-ho, Parasite
Sam Mendes, 1917
Todd Phillips, Joker
Martin Scorsese, The Irishman
Quentin Tarantino, Once Upon a Time in Hollywood
Best Performance by an Actor in a Limited Series or Movie
Christopher Abbott, Catch-22
Sacha Baron Cohen, The Spy
Russell Crowe, The Loudest Voice
Jared Harris, Chernobyl
Sam Rockwell, Fosse/Verdon
Best Performance by an Actress in a Limited Series or Movie
Kaitlyn Dever, Unbelievable
Joey King, The Act - Hulu 
Helen Mirren, Catherine the Great - Foxtel
Merritt Wever, Unbelievable
Michelle Williams, Fosse/Verdon
Best Performance by a Supporting Actor in a Series, Limited Series, or TV Movie
Alan Arkin, The Kominsky Method
Kieran Culkin, Succession
Andrew Scott, Fleabag
Stellan Skarsgård, Chernobyl
Henry Winkler, Barry
Best Performance by a Supporting Actress in a Series, Limited Series, or TV Movie
Patricia Arquette, The Act 
Helena Bonham Carter, The Crown
Toni Collette, Unbelievable
Meryl Streep, Big Little Lies
Emily Watson, Chernobyl
Best Score for a Motion Picture
Little Women
Joker
Marriage Story
1917
Motherless Brooklyn
Best Original Song
“Beautiful Ghosts,” Cats
“(I’m Gonna) Love Me Again,” Rocketman
“Into the Unknown,” Frozen II
“Spirit,” The Lion King
“Stand Up,” Harriet
Best Performance by an Actor in a Comedy Series
Michael Douglas, The Kominsky Method - Netflix
Bill Hader, Barry - HBO
Ben Platt, The Politician - Netflix
Paul Rudd, Living With Yourself - Netflix
Ramy Youssef, Ramy - Stan
Best Performance by an Actress in a Comedy Series
Christina Applegate, Dead to Me - Netflix
Kirsten Dunst, On Becoming a God in Central Florida -  SBS
Rachel Brosnahan, The Marvelous Mrs. Maisel - Amazon Prime
Natasha Lyonne, Russian Doll - Netflix
Phoebe Waller-Bridge, Fleabag - Amazon Prime
Best Performance by an Actor in a Drama Series
Brian Cox, Succession - HBO
Kit Harington, Game of Thrones - Foxtel
Rami Malek, Mr. Robot - HBO
Tobias Menzies, The Crown
Billy Porter, Pose -Foxtel
Best Performance by an Actress in a Drama Series
Jennifer Aniston, The Morning Show - Apple TV+
Jodie Comer, Killing Eve
Olivia Colman, The Crown
Nicole Kidman, Big Little Lies
Reese Witherspoon, The Morning Show
Best Performance by a Supporting Actor in a Motion Picture 
Tom Hanks, A Beautiful Day in the Neighborhood
Anthony Hopkins, The Two Popes
Al Pacino, The Irishman
Joe Pesci, The Irishman
Brad Pitt, Once Upon a Time in Hollywood
Best Screenplay
Marriage Story
Parasite
The Two Popes
Once Upon a Time in Hollywood
The Irishman
Best Performance by a Supporting Actress in a Motion Picture
Kathy Bates, Richard Jewell
Annette Bening, The Report
Laura Dern, Marriage Story
Jennifer Lopez, Hustlers
Margot Robbie, Bombshell
Best Performance by an Actor in a Motion Picture — Musical or Comedy
Daniel Craig, Knives Out
Taron Egerton, Rocketman
Roman Griffin Davis, Jojo Rabbit
Eddie Murphy, Dolemite Is My Name
Leonardo DiCaprio, Once Upon a Time in Hollywood
Best Performance by an Actor in a Motion Picture — Drama
Christian Bale, Ford v Ferrari
Antonio Banderas, Pain and Glory
Adam Driver, Marriage Story
Joaquin Phoenix, Joker
Jonathan Pryce, The Two Popes
Best Performance by an Actress in a Motion Picture — Musical or Comedy
Ana de Armas, Knives Out
Cate Blanchett, Where’d You Go, Bernadette
Beanie Feldstein, Booksmart
Emma Thompson, Late Night
Awkwafina, The Farewell
Best Performance by an Actress in a Motion Picture — Drama
Cynthia Erivo, Harriet
Scarlett Johansson, Marriage Story
Saoirse Ronan, Little Women
Charlize Theron, Bombshell
Renée Zellweger, Judy

Whenever I tell people that I have a website that is dedicated to reviewing movies they always ask me the same question - What's Your Favourite Movie of All Time? As a lover of movies, this is one of the hardest questions that I ever get asked because it is almost impossible to choose just one movie when I have seen and enjoyed so many.
There is a reason that I have a Hall of Fame page that is dedicated to movies that I gave 5 Chilli Peppers to, and that's because I find it so hard to compare movies from different genres against each other. If someone asks me what my favourite movie is, I usually respond with 'that depends on which genre you're talking about.'
If I could have the option of choosing a favourite in each genre, then I could definitely tell you my favourites without any trouble at all:
DRAMA: Manchester by the Sea
HORROR: Rosemary's Baby
SCIENCE FICTION: Interstellar
​WAR: Inglourious Basterds
SUPER: Avengers: Endgame
COMEDY: Snatch
CRIME/ACTION: No Country for Old Men
ART HOUSE: Youth
FOREIGN: The Great Beauty (La Grande Bellezza) 
FANTASY: The Lord of the Rings Trilogy
GRITTY: Melancholia
ROMANCE: Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind 
KID FRIENDLY: Kubo and the Two Strings 

So why are these my favourite films when I have so many more listed on my Hall of Fame that are also 5 Chilli Peppers worthy? Well that's easy, these are the movies that I go back to time and time again and always enjoy them just as much as I did the first time that I watched them. All of them had an effect on me in one way or another and all of them left me pondering after I had seen them. I guess that I really don't have one favourite movie of all time, I actually have 13, which also happens to be my lucky number! 

It's almost been ten days since our Zoe arrived back home after breaking up with her fiance and partner of 8 years Lachlainn. The news came as a bit of a shock to us all, but maybe I just didn't want to see the problems because I wanted to believe that Zoe was happy, but in truth, she wasn't. Looking back on these things with hindsight you can always see the cracks and chips in clarity but at the time you are just blinded by what you want to see. It is always like this with breakups of any kind I think, and even though the clarity is there, it really doesn't make breaking up any easier to do. 
Zoe has been strong and organised with this break up to within an inch of her life, which is what we have all come to expect from our Zoe. She's tough and she strong, and it does take great strength to admit that things aren't working and then to also walk away from them. Zoe leaves behind eight years of memories and most of her formative years experiences with Lachlainn since they practically grew up together. Zoe was only 14 years old when she and Lachlainn got together, so it is both fair and probably to be expected that they have just grown apart as time has progressed, and we really should have seen this coming to be honest, but as I said hindsight is 20/20. 
I think back to some of the douche bags that I was hooking up with when I was only 14 years old and...jeez! There is no way that I could probably even stand to be in the same room with some of those weirdos let alone in a relationship with them. Not that I am saying that Lachlainn is a douchebag or anything, but the likelihood of wanting someone that you hooked up with when you were a kid as an adult are probably slim to none.
Craig and I got together when I was just short of 18 and we have had more dramatic episodes than Days of Our Lives on the way to eventually finding happiness and contentment together. We broke up numerous times, fought like we were on the set of Rocky, got regularly and spectacularly wasted together like we were Sid and Nancy at an Irish stag do and eventually popped out the other end (somehow) still together.
And I'm not going to lie to you, it was really hard to stay together when we were young, it felt downright impossible at times. We were both the youngest of five children so we were both used to having our own ways and we had no idea how to make a relationship work, we were both headstrong, opinionated brats. However, unlike Zoe and Lachlainn we were already married and had a home mortgage and a child before we were even 25 so we felt like we had to stick it out through thick and thin, it was complicated. Fortunately for Zoe and Lachlainn they didn't have any of these responsibilities to make them feel tethered together, so breaking up became amicable and quite simple really, well as simple as breakups can be if that's any consolation. 
Breaking up, no matter how clean, is not easy. You are never  just leaving another person, but also leaving a part of yourself and a way of being that you may have grown accustomed to. You leave behind who you once were when you were with that person and you are technically re-inventing yourself into another version of yourself. A single version of yourself, which will be hard for Zoe because she hasn't really experienced being single yet, it's totally foreign territory. However, as we all know, foreign territory although a little scary at times, can also be exciting, exhilarating and empowering. And if anyone is going to be able to stand on their own two feet, I have absolutely no doubt that Zoe will. She has more strong independent woman in her than Sinead O'Connor and I really believe that although it is sad that she has broken up with Lachlainn that this will be her time to shine and really come into her own. 
Sometimes we need a clean break to kick start a new life, and sometimes that opportunity can only be seized by letting go of an old and outmoded version of ourselves. Sometimes letting go of people in our lives that are holding us back from meeting our true potential is only sad for a short time before we can fluff up our own wings again and take flight on our own. And I cannot deny that the very selfish and motherly parts of me are genuinely  excited to have my darling daughter back in the nest for me to fuss over once again. Here together we can support her, help her to heal the broken parts of herself and then help her to move on to the next big adventure that life has in store for her. Zoe deserves all of that and more and now it is her chance to fly solo, put herself first and do whatever she wants to do. 

I am always so surprised when people tell me that they get bored. Who gets bored these day? It is such a weird and incomprehensible thing for me to fathom because I honestly cannot remember the last time that I felt slightly bored. With so many interesting things to do and so many things that simply must be done, I rarely have that much free downtime as it is, and when I do have it, I can assure you that I am never, ever bored. 
You don't have to have a million hobbies or be profoundly busy to distract yourself from boredom, in fact there are so many things that you can do with your downtime that are not only enjoyable but also super productive as well. Here is a list of my personal favourite boredom beaters, as well as some other ideas that I haven't even had the time to have a crack at yet.  
​If should ever find yourself with some free time and nothing to do with it, then I suggest that you take a look at this list: 

• Learn a new skill, language or hobby.
• Read a book. 
• Listen to a podcast.
• Schedule appointments at the doctor, masseuse, dentist, salon etc. 
• Work out. 
• Go for a walk.
• Bake.
• Learn to play an instrument. 
• Set yourself a new personal goal (in detail with all of the steps) and get busy making it happen.
• Start a blog.
• Watch a movie or TV series.
• Write in a journal.
• Go through your old photos and make up some memory albums.
• Revise your budget.
• Do yoga. 
• Visit a local tourist attraction.
• Volunteer.
• Knit, sew or crochet something. 
• Declutter your home. 
• Play a game, either a board game or a console game. 
• Make plans to catch up with friends or family somewhere new. 
• Take an online course.
• Start meditating.
• Clean out your inbox and unsubscribe to emails.
• Create a vision board. 
• Write a meal plan and a shopping list to go with it. 
• Clean out your wardrobe.
• Paint a picture or color in a mindful coloring book.
• Reconnect with people you haven't seen in while eg. email, text, call. 
• Plan a holiday.
• Update your resume.
• Go to the cinema. 
• Call a long distance friend or family member for a chat.
• Watch an inspiring Ted Talk. 
• Perform a random act of kindness. 
• Clean out your pantry and fridge.
• Practise self care eg. take a bath, exfoliate, give yourself a facial, pedicure or manicure. 
• Cook a new dish.
• Start a veggie or floral garden.
• Pick up a camera and start shooting.
• Visit the local library. 
• Make a craft or fold origami. 
• Find a youtube channel that interests you and follow it. 
• Donate to charity. 

I know that there is nothing actually wrong with being bored from time to time, sometimes it can actually be a good thing because it motivates us to try new things. But it's just generally so grey, melancholic and unproductive that I don't think that anyone would actually choose to be bored. Besides from what I have seen and learnt about boredom over the years, I think that it can lead people down some pretty strange and even destructive roads if it goes on for too long. What's that old saying about 'idle hands and the devils work'? I can't say for sure that being productive or unbored will actually keep anyone out of trouble, but it will certainly leave less time for anyone to find it!  

So many people are getting sick at the moment, and it's easy to understand why when the weather is constantly freezing and the wind chill factor makes your fingers, toes and face ache. Even Craig, who rarely if ever gets sick, has a runny nose, sore throat and even gravelier than usual rattle to his speech. The kids at my school appear to have various things leaking out of a variety of orifices and a number of the staff are looking a little worse for wear in spite of just returning from a winter holiday break. But that is July in Ballarat for you - cold, freezing, freezing cold or Tundra, and if you don't like cold weather then moving here would be the stupidest idea in the world. 
A common misconception about Australia is that we have nothing but hot weather. I think that a lot of foreigner visitors expect that since we have so much desert that we are going to be sweltering hot all year round, but that is just not the case. I cannot deny that summers are actually pretty hot all over the country, with the exception of Tasmania which never seems to get over 35 degrees celsius. And I know that 35 degrees celcius may sound hot to some people, but when it comes to Australian summers, 35 is considered the ideal.
In summer it genuinely does get hot, really, really hot. I have seen roads literally melting into sticky tar puddles and desperate snakes searching for water in very open and risky areas in the summertime and it is nothing to get a string of 45+ degree days that make you intensely worried about bushfires when you live in the outlying bush areas.
However, contrary to popular opinions about Australia, it doesn't stay like that all year round and some areas are frickin freezing and even snowy in the winter time. Ballarat is one of those areas and if you're from another more temperate area of the country, the weather here can seem brutally cold and the winters intolerably long. It seems brutally cold and intolerably long to me, and I have lived in the area for over 30 years, but to be truthful I do this every year. I whinge about the cold in the dark of winter and I complain about melting at the peak of summer, but at the end of the day I have very good heating and cooling, and absolutely nothing to whine about at all. I even had my hot water system die this winter and guess what?I lived! Okay, I stank a lot too, but I did survive until I could pin down a plumber to sort out my problem. 
​I think that if you have your health you can face just about anything really, and that's why I really don't want to catch another dreaded lurgy right now, I've already had one of those this year and I hated it! I can totally deal with the wind, the ice and even the snow but please, please don't let me get another lurgy!
Sidenote: I'm already regretting putting that much energy into the sickness topic now, it's a bloody recipe for disaster! I'm just asking for trouble! 

Even the most secure people in the world need to be reassured from time to time, it's human to seek validation and it is not weak to admit that you require some reassured from time to time. I know that every now and then I like to be told that I'm doing okay, that I'm a good person and that I'm completely lovable, and when I don't receive any validation for a while, I start to listen to my persistent and annoying inner voice of self doubt, and then I start to stumble. 
I wasn't raised in a very validating home as a child. Behavioural expectations were high, imperfections were highlighted and opportunities to 'cut one down to size' were used as an everyday form of punishment and embarrassment. Unfortunately, these less than encouraging formative years have had a profound effect on who I have become as an adult, and as a consequence, I have had to severely escalated my efforts to break certain molds and cycles and find a sense of self assurance.
In the past, I have been rejected by my parents because they didn't like my behaviour, I have lost friends who thought that I wasn't worth the effort and my own siblings have all estranged me because they've perceived me to be unlovable and mean. As you would imagine, these things have had a massive effect on my life and have made me quite insecure. I have struggled all my life to feel accepted, comfortable and secure with who I am.
I have poured unknowable hours of my time into self help, self motivation and self care in an attempt to quench my need for acceptance and love, but sometimes you can only get the type of reassurance that you are really looking for from the people around you. There is no book, guide, meditation, fitness class, job or other external thing that can replace someone that you love telling you that they also love you and think that you're amazing. And that is a fact, we all need to feel like we are loved by someone and that we are perfect just the way that we are. It is not just reassuring, it's downright empowering to love and be loved in return, it's the best feeling in the world to know that there is someone on the planet that adores you in some way, shape or form for just being who you are. 
The bottom line is that none of us are completely self-sufficient, even though many of us pretend to be. However, the best thing that all of my self help attempts has taught me over the years is that the most insecure people in the world are those that cannot acknowledge their fears and insecurities, and that pretending to have it all together when you don't is not only stupid, it's also counterproductive to moving forward.  
So now, when I feel like I'm floundering, I just tell people. I spill out the stupid in my head and I say out loud - I need some reassurance. And it is totally okay to say that. No-one feels fabulous all of the time, and sometimes a simple word of reassurance from someone that you care about can be enough to get you back on track and fight off that self deprecating voice inside of you that can be doggedly determined to convince you otherwise.
No-one has to break out the accolades, send in the marching band or shroud me with words of praise in order to reassure me, a simple - I think you're important and I care about you is really all that it takes to reboot my system. But sometimes I need to hear it, and as corny and as silly as that may sound to admit, I just need to hear it. I'm human and sometimes I need some reassurance, and you know, I really don't think that there is anything wrong with admitting that. 

One of the things that I do enjoy most about a mid-winter break is the ability to catch up on some late night viewing and couch potato antics without any guilty feelings whatsoever. Not having to get up and go to work in the morning allows me to indulge in the pleasure of watching entire seasons of television programs and back to back movies, and honestly it is just heaven. With a good strong coffee in hand, a couple of fluffed up pillows and a cosy blanket, I have managed to wonderfully while away many of my holiday evenings in front of the idiot box and I am more than happy to share my joyful at home viewing highlights with you, should you also wish to indulge in some quality lounge room viewing. 

As far as television goes, there has been no shortage of high quality, engaging programming to get completely lost in this year. I have watched a tonne of television this year, more than I ever have before and a lot of it has been of a really high standard as well. The best that I have seen and would highly recommend so far this year are: (in no particular order) 
Escape at Dannemora (Stan) - dramatisation
Sally 4Ever (HBO - Foxtel) - comedy
After Life (Netflix) - comedy drama
Les Miserables (BBC - Foxtel) - period drama
Game of Thrones - S8 (HBO - Foxtel) - fantasy drama
American Gods S2 (Amazon Prime) - fantasy drama
What We Do in the Shadows (FX - Foxtel) - horror comedy 
This Country (Stan) - comedy mockumentary 
Forever (Amazon Prime) - fantasy drama
Killing Eve s2 (ABC iview) - crime drama
The Last O.G. S2 (Stan) - comedy 
The Let Down S2 (ABC iview) - comedy 
Bad Omens (Amazon Prime) - fantasy drama
Detectorists S3 (ABC iview)  - comedy 
Gentleman Jack (HBO - Foxtel) - period drama
Bridget & Eamon (Amazon Prime) - comedy 
Euphoria (HBO - Foxtel) - drama
Chernobyl (HBO - Foxtel) - dramatisation 
The Act: Dee Dee and Gypsy Rose (Hulu - Foxtel) - dramatisation 
Perpetual Grace (Stan) - art house 
Big Little Lies S2 (HBO - Foxtel) - drama
Stranger Things S3 (Netflix)  - science fiction

To be honest, quality movies to view at home have been a little thinner on the ground, but it is often quite hard for me to find things that I haven't already seen on streaming channels because I go to the movies so often. Seth and I have been trawling through a lot of classic horror, which SBS on demand has an excellent selection of, should you need to sate a yearning for retro horror like The Texas Chainsaw Massacre, Halloween, Hellraiser or Scanners. Aside from that Amazon Prime has the largest B grade horror library that I have ever encountered, admittedly it is mostly shit, but you can find the odd retro gem in there as well like Night of the Living Dead, Carrie,  Zombieland and the Friday the 13th Series. 
However, without further ado, here is a list of the best movies that I have watched on the couch (not at the cinema) this year so far: (again listed in no particular order)
Film Stars Don't Die in Liverpool - Netflix (Romance) 
It's Actually a Funny Story - Netflix (Drama)
Suspiria - Amazon Prime (Horror) 
Hush - Netflix (Horror) 
Tully - Netflix (Drama)
The Poughkeepsie Tapes - Stan (Gritty) 
Observance - Amazon Prime (Horror)
American Animals - Foxtel (Crime) 
I am Mother - Netflix (Sci-Fi) 
Pin Cushion - SBS on demand (Gritty) 
Mandy - Foxtel (Horror) 
Full reviews of all of these films can be found on the corresponding genre lists in the drop down menu above if you're looking for more information.
Happy viewing my friends! 

Spicywatch.com has just turned 5, hip hip hooray Spicywatch! Apart from my family and friends, I don't think that I have poured this much of my spare time and energy consistently into anything before, and for as long as I can remember, I don't feel like I have loved or enjoyed pouring my spare time into anything as much as I have loved sharing Spicywatch with all of you wonderful readers. 
Watching and reviewing movies is not just a hobby for me anymore, it is an important part of my life now. For five years I have shared my thoughts, my opinions and my passion for cinema with you all, and so far I have managed to review 790 movies that I honestly believe are worthy of your time and effort to view. I look forward to one day having 1,000 movies on my Spicywatch genre lists that are worthy of your time, but it will take me quite a few more years to get that far. 
Last nights celebrations were focused on the Best Music Moments in Cinema, which is a broad topic, but extremely fun one to investigate. Musicals were most welcome, but not mandatory, and as it turned out, there are actually a huge number of movies that have very significant and memorable music scenes in them that are actually completely non-musical movies. 
My wonderful and supportive friends and family gathered in Enfield to share a drink and their cinematic loves with me; and we laughed, sang and got our groove on to some of the most unexpected (but mostly excellent) musical moments that we could find.
And here is the extensive list of best music moments in cinema (from every genre) as chosen by my nearest and dearest, that made it to the Spicywatch 5th Birthday celebration screening in my living room last night:
Baby Driver (Bellbottoms) 
Pulp Fiction (You Never Can Tell) 
Beetlejuice (Banana Boat Song) 
The Skeleton Twins (Nothings Gonna Stop Us Now) 
Ferris Bueller's Day Off (Twist and Shout) 
Coraline (Garden Scene composed by Peter Corrigan) 
Pretty in Pink (If You Leave) 
The Perks of Being  a Wallflower (Heroes) 
Napoleon Dynamite (Canned Heat) 
Little Miss Sunshine (Super Freak)
Straight Outta Compton (Boyz N Da Hood) 
The Blues Brothers (Shake Your Tail Feather) 
Two Hands (These Days) 
American Psycho (Hip to be Square) 
The Lion King (Circle of Life) 
The Secret Life of Walter Mitty (Space Oddity) 
The Hunt for the Wilderpeople (Ricky's Birthday Song) 
Guardians of the Galaxy (Mr Blue Sky) 
Moulin Rouge (Come What May) 
Mean Girls (Jingle Bell Rock) 
Trainspotting (Lust for Life) 
Sound of Music (Edelweiss) 
Reservoir Dogs (Stuck in the Middle) 
O Brother Where Art Thou? (I Am a Man of Constant Sorrow)
Risky Business (Old Time Rock and Roll) 
Easy A (A Pocketful of Sunshine) 
The Mask (Cuban Pete)
Nacho Libre (Encarnacion) 
Hedwig and the Angry Inch (Origins of Love) 
The Big Lebowski (Just Dropped In) 
Pitch Perfect (Riff off) 
Purple Rain (Title Track) 
Love Actually (Jump) 
Bridesmaids (Hold on) 
Little Fish (Flame Trees) 
Slumdog Millionaire (Jai Ho)
Indiana Jones and the Temple of Doom (Anything Goes) 
Singing in the Rain (Title track)
And one of my all time favourites: Mulholland Drive (Llorando/ Crying) 

Mother's Day is the one day of the year that we get to celebrate and spend time with the women in our lives that mean the most to us. I had lunch with Craig's mother yesterday and today I traveled to Ararat to see my own mother, whom I have been cultivating a loving and genuine relationship with over the last couple of years. The way that my mother and I finally found our deeper connection with each other came about in the most unusual and painful of ways, but now I have a really terrific relationship with my mum and I am so glad that I have been able to get to know her so completely in her twilight years. 
Around two years ago, I had a really traumatic estrangement from my siblings. One of them, in an attempt to destroy my relationship with my parents, trawled my blog and printed out any posts that contained defamatory content about my mum and dad. They took those printed pages and gave them to my parents, which was not only deeply mean to me but downright cruel to my elderly parents who were very distressed by my writings. I had to own that some of the things that I had said in the past about my parents were unkind, unnecessary and unproductive to our relationship. 
I think that at that point in my life I was using my blog to process my feelings and pour out some of my confusions and misgivings about the people in my family. There was no way to take any of it back and all of the cards were left face up on the table, well for me they were anyway. However, just as the saying goes "the truth shall set you free" and in that exposure, there was a cleansing and with everything laid bare and stripped back, there was no room to hide away, it was time to have some honest and awkward conversations. 
I did not attempt to discuss what my siblings had said to me about my parents themselves in defense of my writings, I owned what I had written completely, the bottom line was that all of those comments had come from me and I had been mean. I promised that I wouldn't talk poorly about them again and that I would work hard to make everything up to them, if they would give me the chance to. My parents were really upset, for a very long time, not just with me but also with my siblings for their vicious behaviour and it has taken me two years to shake off the effects of my estrangement from my siblings and regain the trust of my parents again. 
I now proudly have a meaningful and profound relationship with my mother, one that is based on trust and honesty.  I am not the same person that I was two years ago, and I am no longer petty or consumed by the mistakes of the past. I do not want to go through my life not knowing my mother, understanding my mother, loving my mother and being there for my mother. Having a better relationship with my mum has allowed me to understand the choices that she has made in her own life, why she is the person that she is and just how much she needs and deserves to be loved.
I doubt that I will ever thank my siblings for wounding me as deeply as they did, because that is a wound that just doesn't seem to heal no matter how attentive I am to it, but I cannot deny that out of their hate I did manage to find a real love and respect for my parents that I may not have enjoyed if none of it had ever happened. I don't talk poorly about my parent anymore, I don't complain about my family dynamic to people and I don't spend my free time looking for problems where there are none. As a mother myself, I understand that a meaningful relationship with my own mother is one of the most valuable things that I can ever enjoy in this life, and I have that now and I love spending time with my mother.

​ATONEMENT
Release Date: 2007
Rating: MA 15+
Running Time: 123 mins 
A romance/war drama, based on Ian McEwan's popular 2001 novel of the same name. Director Joe Wright became the youngest director to open at the 64th Venice International Film Festival at the age of 35 with Atonement, and he enjoyed a lot of notoriety and attention for his saga that outlines a crime and it's consequences over six decades. 
Filled with jealousy and malice, young Briony Tallis (Saoirse Ronan) hatches a story to keep her older sister Cecilia (Keira Knightley) away from the an old family friend and army private named Robbie Turner(James McAvoy). Her deception changes the course of several lives and when war breaks out in Britain, it seems an impossibility that  the two lovers will ever reunite.
This is truly a tale of enduring love, immensely sad and overflowing with unrequited passions. The directing here is on point, the scenes are lush and grandiose, and the actors are so good that they practically outshine the script. I cannot deny that I enjoyed it, for a period romance it was up there for me, it had enough intrigue to keep me interested and there were plenty of beautiful things to look at as well, especially James McAvoy who looks amazing in this. 
FINAL SAY: I love you. I'll wait for you.
4 Chilli Peppers

I was having a conversation with a good friend of mine the other day and they told me that they felt that they would never find love. Naturally my reaction to this information was, why? In my mind this person is more than lovable, attractive, very intelligent and financially stable, why would someone like that have any trouble finding a meaningful and loving relationship? And then when she started to answer me, it all became very clear why. She had a list of potential partner prerequisites that would make a Harvard post-graduate with a six pack and a Lamborghini run away screaming, it was insane! And it got me thinking about realistic expectations when it comes to meeting a potential partner. 
My friend's list of requirements (and I am pretty sure that you would have heard something similar before) went a little something like this:
My potential love interest needs to be fit, financially comfortable, funny, adventurous and have a really good job. 
I would imagine that there millions of women that have lists very similar to this as their personal  prerequisites to love and I have to say that it is extremely disturbing. Finding a combination of traits like that in anyone at any one given time is going to be extremely rare, but are any of these individual ideals actually realistic anyway? 
My husband is certainly not what anyone would call funny most of the time, but sometimes he is gut bustingly hilarious! Does that count as funny? Who is funny all of the time anyway? That is creepy! And what about being fit? What level of 'fit' are we talking about here? A marathon runner is fit and a bodybuilder looks fit but they are completely different body types, and someone who is super fit would be at the gym or working out all of the time, is that what you're looking for? I asked her. 
And what if some great guy was rich and then gave it all away to charity, would he not be financially stable enough to be considered a good partner? What if he was just between terrific jobs, but was currently unemployed because he had just given up 12 months of his life to go and vaccinate children in Botswana against typhoid, would that guy not be worthy of consideration because he didn't have 'a really good job' at the moment? 
You can see where I am going with all of this right? I said. You have put up walls and expectations that are not only unrealistic but they are not allowing any potential partner to infiltrate that barrier because you don't want them to be human, fallible or individual. How bloody sad! And what about me as a friend? Do you hold me to ransom with the same high expectations? I am not fit, or wealthy and I only have a low earning job, does that mean that I am not good enough for you? 
Of course my friend said no, that they loved me dearly and that they would never see me as anything but a terrific friend and lifelong confident, and that was where I got her and I could see the look on her face. The penny had just dropped and she could finally see that she was actually holding herself back from having meaningful and lifelong relationships with men because she had put so many expectations on them. 
At the end of the day, love cannot be put into a pigeon hole and neither can anyone that you allow yourself to love. Sometimes we are all funny or more stable or flush with funds; and sometimes we are stronger or fitter or more secure, and then other times we are none of those things at all, and that's called life. In life, and love, there are no perfects...at best you may get some pretty perfect days and moments but nothing is ever permanent.
There is nothing wrong with aiming high for yourself, but expectations need to be kept realistic and viable or they are just going to hold you back from life and love. Love doesn't exist in a tiny perfect package, that's just what everybody wants you to think. Instagram is rife with snippets of perfection and people get really caught up in that bullshit and start to aim for something that isn't even real. Let me tell you that real love is messy and unpredictable, it farts on the couch and drinks milk from the carton and will probably make you angry and even cry sometimes, and that's okay. That means it's real. 
So in the end I reassured my friend that she has no reason to believe that she will never fall in love, because any idiot can fall in love, and there are millions of lonely people in the world looking for a connection, she just needs to put her phone back on the hook because she hasn't been receiving! And besides, any fool that decides to have someone as nutty as me as a best friend can definitely find love out there in the big wide world! Stranger things than that happen every damn day!  

STRANGER THAN FICTION
Release Date: 2006
Rating: M
Running Time: 113 mins 
A fantasy romance tale, directed by Marc Forster and written by Zach Helm (better known for his work on Mr Magorium's Wonder Emporium) that offers a sweet and entertaining look into the lives of ordinary everyday people with a whimsical and quirky backdrop. 
Harold Crick, an insanely regimented IRS agent, has his predictable life turned upside down when he begins to hear an internal voice that is narrating the events of his life as they occur. When he falls for Ana, the baker that he has been assigned to audit, things rapidly get even more out of hand for Harold. 
Will Ferrell delivers one of his best ever performances as Harold, and Maggie Gyllenhaal offers another believable quirky indie-chick performance. It is actually the incredible cast that really brings this film to life; Emma Thompson, Dustin Hoffman, Queen Latifah and Tom Hulce all bring levity to the story; which although isn't life changing, is intelligent, charming and quite good fun. 
FINAL SAY: I brought you flours. 
3.5 Chilli Peppers ​

I love going to the movies or sitting down to watch a film and finding a hidden gem. Sometimes I get the most delightfully unexpected surprise from a movie that I wasn't expecting it from, and I just love it when that happens, it really spins my tyres! And it really doesn't happen as often as I would like, a lot of the time when I leave a cinema or get off the couch after a movie I am left with a rather underwhelmed kind of a feeling or even worse, I start to contemplate the hours that I just wasted and will never get back again!
Life is way too short to waste reading bad books, watching poor movies and wasting your precious and valuable free time having mediocre experiences. Especially cinematic ones, after all that's why you have me! I've already found heaps of hidden gems for you, so you can just relax and enjoy the movies that I consider to be the best (and unmissable) hidden gems that you may have accidentally missed or overlooked.
Now, don't feel bad about it, people actually miss a lot of top quality viewing experiences all of the time because smaller and independent movies just get squashed by blockbuster movies, and most people just aren't going to the movies to see small budget or independent films. They also aren't going to the cinema half as much as I am either I would imagine, so it's more than likely that you've missed some of these rippers along the way, not through any fault of your own, but just from a lack of exposure; but never fear....I've got your back!
In no particular order (and remember that my full reviews of these films are on their genre lists if you want more information), here are my top 20 picks for hidden gem movies that you may have missed: 

1. The One I Love (Romance) 
2. Don Jon (Drama)
3. The Cabin in the Woods (Horror)
4. The Only Lovers Left Alive (Art House)
5. Short Term 12 (Drama)
6. A Ghost Story (Art House)
7. Wind River (Drama)
8. Once (Foreign/Romance)
9. Calvary (Art House/Foreign)
10. Moon (sci-fi)
11. Ingrid Goes West (Drama)
12. Son of Rambow (Comedy)
13. Sightseers (Foreign) 
14. In the Mood for Love (Foreign)
15. Young Adult (Drama)
16. Beautiful Boy (Drama)
17. Me and Earl and the Dying Girl (Drama)
18. Youth (Drama)
19. The Fall (Fantasy)
20. The Grand Seduction (Comedy)

I have only been back at work for two days and I have already found my number one hidden gem movie of the year! How good is that? And when you are as movie obsessed as I am and constantly thirsting for quality entertainment, then that is something to get happy about!

Age gap is something that regularly comes up in random conversation and everyone pretty much has their own opinion around what is an acceptable age gap for a couple and what is not. To be honest, I generally don't give that much of a shit about age gap, but I would be lying if I said that I didn't find some age gap relationships a little over the top and somewhat cringe worthy. 
If you ask google what is an acceptable age gap it comes up with this interesting statement:
The rules state that by dividing your own age by two and then adding seven you can find the socially-acceptable minimum age of anyone you want to date. 
My first wondering about that statement is who actually created this so called 'rule' that they speak of? And their definition of a 'socially acceptable minimum age' is, in itself, an extremely grey area, I mean can people outside of this equation still be accepted into society or will they forever feel the sting of being ostracized for their forbidden passions? And why are they assuming that everyone wants to date someone younger than they are? What are the rules for older partners? 
If this statement is true then I could be dating a 29 year old which may not raise too many eyebrows, and if the same applies in reverse then I could also be dating a 73 year old, which may raise even more eyebrows. So, according to this google formula I can date anyone between 29 and 73 and no-one would be put out or offended, but if I started dating a 28 year old or a 74 year old, well that would just be getting freaky. 
I don't think that there really are any 'rules' around age gap dating, because we all know that love is love and that consenting adults have the right to date anyone that they want to. However, as I said earlier there are some age gap relationships that do make me feel uncomfortable. I don't think that people should be dating anyone that is the same age or younger than their own children, and I also don't think that people should date anyone older than their own biological parents either.
In my case, if I was to date someone around my children's age I would be seeing a 21 year old and if I was to date someone around my parents age then my partner would be in their 80's and I am not comfortable with either of those options. Now I know that everyone has their own personal boundaries around age gap dating, and I am not claiming that my choices are correct, I am simply stating that that is where I draw my line in the sand on age gap romances. 
Hollywood is notorious for putting massive age gaps in movies that no-one ever bats an eye at because they are usually younger women with older men; in fact an older man with a younger lady is generally not considered to be nearly as controversial as an older lady with a younger man is for some reason. Perhaps it is because we are conditioned to seeing more older men with younger women romance dynamics in cinema and as a result of that we have become conditioned to accepting it as normal. 
Here are some prime examples of older men with significantly younger women in romance films that defy the realms of acceptable, and yet no-one seemed too bothered about them at all:
Drew Barrymore and Tom Skerritt in Poison Ivy - 42 year gap
Kevin Spacey and Mena Suvari in American Beauty - 20 year gap
Gary Cooper and Audrey Hepburn in Love in the Afternoon - 28 year gap
Woody Allen and Mariel Hemingway in Manhattan - 26 year age gap
Johnny Depp and Amber Heard in The Rum Diary - 23 year gap
Brad Pitt and Rose Byrne in Troy - 16 year gap
Gabriel Byrne and Winona Ryder in Little Women - 21 year gap
Richard Gere and Hilary Swank in Amelia - 25 year gap
Timothy Hutton and Natalie Portman in Beautiful Girls - 21 year gap
Tom Cruise and Olga Kurylenko in Oblivion - 17 year gap
Liam Neeson and Olivia Wilde in Third Person - 32 year gap
Denzel Washington and Lymari Nadal in American Gangster - 23 year gap
Hugh Laurie and Leighton Meester in The Oranges - 27 year gap
However, to be fair, Hollywood doesn't always get it wrong when it comes to age gap movies and there have been some truly tasteful and empowering age gap movies that are not only plausible but also liberating in terms of love and what both platonic and romantic love can look like. Some of my personal favourite recommendations are:

• Film Stars Don't Die in Liverpool - Jamie Bell and Annette Benning - 28 year gap
• The Reader - Kate Winslet and David Kross - 21 year age gap
• Harold and Maude - Ruth Gordon and Bud Cort - 52 year gap
• Leon the Professional - Jean Reno and Natalie Portman - 33 year age gap
• Lost in Translation - Scarlett Johansson and Bill Murray - 34 year gap
• The Graduate - Anne Bancroft and Dustin Hoffman- 10 year gap
• Seeking a Friend for the End of the World -Steve Carell and Keira Knightley - 22 year gap

At the end of the day, everyone knows that age is really just a number and that it can never define what is acceptable in terms of real love and meaningful relationships. I suppose that it is important to not get hung up on the actual age gap in a relationship but rather to look deeper at the parameters of that love and whether or not it is respectful, meaningful, plausible and genuine, and if it is indeed all of those things, then who am I to judge? 

That time has rolled around again, the time for me to collate all of my viewing efforts and put forward my recommendations for the best viewing choices of 2018. As I have mentioned before, quality television really dominated my time this year and I gave more 5 Chilli Pepper ratings to TV series than I gave to movies this year. To be honest, overall I do feel that the quality of movies this year was not as strong as it was in 2017, and I feel like I watched a lot more mediocre movies than I did last year as well, but sometimes that happens. 
In total I viewed 253 movies in 2018 and 133 TV series (some of which had several seasons). I have watched programs across every genre, and I can honestly say that there were excellent offerings in all of those genres in both movies and television. This year I am not going to list my least favorite viewings for 2018 because I have made myself a new years resolution to be more positive and to not focus on the negative things, so to list the worst things I saw in 2018 would be counterproductive to that resolution. Besides, as I have said before, even if I didn't love it, doesn't mean that someone else won't or that it is rubbish. At the end of the day, even the movies that we don't really enjoy have required a lot of time, money and effort to be produced; to shit on someone else's dream or vision is a pretty lousy thing to do, so I am choosing not to go there. 
I hope that you find something on these lists that you have not seen yet and can hopefully now explore. For full reviews of all of the recommended movies below, just go to the appropriate genre tab at the top of the page.
So without any further ado, here are my TOP MOVIE CHOICES (2018 release):  

• ROMA - Foreign 4.5 Chilli Peppers
• Hereditary - Horror 4.5 Chilli Peppers 
• Beautiful Boy - Drama 4.5 Chilli Peppers 
• Isle of Dogs - Kid Friendly 4.5 Chilli Peppers
• BlacKkKlannsman  - Drama 4 Chilli Peppers 
• A Star in Born - Romance 4 Chilli Peppers 
• The Tale - Gritty 4 Chilli Peppers 
• Paddington 2 - Kid Friendly 4 Chilli Peppers 
• Avengers: Infinity War -  Super 4 Chilli Peppers 
• The Ballad of Buster Scruggs - Art House 4 Chilli Peppers 
• Upgrade - Science Fiction/ Action 4 Chilli Peppers  
• John Leguizamo: Latin History for Morons - Documentary 4 Chilli Peppers 

HONORABLE MENTIONS:

• A Quiet Place - Sci-Fi/ Horror 3.5 Chilli Peppers
• Annihilation - Sci-Fi 3.5 Chilli Peppers
• Black Panther - Super 3.5 Chilli Peppers
• Ready Player One - Fantasy 3.5 Chilli Peppers
• The Breaker Upperers - Comedy 3.5 Chilli Peppers
• Searching - Crime 3.5 Chilli Peppers
• Game Night - Comedy 3.5 Chilli Peppers
• Love, Simon - Romance 3.5 Chilli Peppers
• Bohemian Rhapsody - Drama 3.5 Chilli Peppers
• Blockers - Comedy 3.5 Chilli Peppers

Here are my top recommendations for pre- 2018 releases that I didn't see until 2018: 

• Three Billboards Outside Ebbing, Missouri - Drama 5 Chilli Peppers (Hall of Fame)
• Bright Star - Romance 4.5 Chilli Peppers
• Wind River - Drama 4 Chilli Peppers
• Good Time - Drama 4 Chilli Peppers 
• The Shape of Water - Fantasy 4 Chilli Peppers 
• Coco - Kid Friendly 4 Chilli Peppers 
• Mudbound - Drama 4 Chilli Peppers
• Call Me by Your Name  - Romance 4 Chilli Peppers 
• Ingrid Goes West - Drama 4 Chilli Peppers 
• Beasts of No Nation - Gritty 4 Chilli Peppers 
• The Tunnel - Foreign 4 Chilli Peppers 

BEST TELEVISION SERIES of 2018: 

• Master of None S2 - Comedy/ Drama 5 Chilli Peppers 
• One Strange Rock - Documentary 5 Chilli Peppers
• Atlanta S2 - Drama 5 Chilli Peppers
• Sharp Objects - Crime 5 Chilli Peppers
• Patrick Melrose - Drama 5 Chilli Peppers
• Kidding - Drama 4.5 Chilli Peppers
• Who is America? - Comedy/ Documentary 4.5 Chilli Peppers
• Here and Now - Drama 4.5 Chilli Peppers
• Maniac - Sci-Fi 4.5 Chilli Peppers
• Lemony Snicket's a Series of Unfortunate Events S2 - Fantasy/ Kid Friendly 4.5 Chilli Peppers 
• Mosaic - Crime 4 Chilli Peppers
• The End of the Fucking World S1 - Crime 4 Chilli Peppers
• Dirk Gently S2 - Fantasy 4 Chilli Peppers
• Barry S1 - Crime/ Drama 4 Chilli Peppers
• AHS - Apocalypse - Horror 4 Chilli Peppers
• Mr Inbetween - Crime 4 Chilli Peppers
• Salt, Fat, Acid, Heat - Documentary 4 Chilli Peppers
• Just Another Immigrant - Comedy  4 Chilli Peppers
• Mr Mercedes S1 - Crime  4 Chilli Peppers
• Wanderlust - Drama  4 Chilli Peppers
• The Miracle - Foreign  4 Chilli Peppers
• Anne with an E S2 - Drama 4 Chilli Peppers

HONORABLE MENTIONS:

• Britannia S1 - Fantasy 3.5 Chilli Peppers 
• Ash vs Evil Dead S3 - Horror/ Comedy 3.5 Chilli Peppers 
• Swedish Dicks S2 - Comedy/ Crime 3.5 Chilli Peppers 
• Future Man - Sci-Fi/Comedy 3.5 Chilli Peppers 
• GLOW S2 - Drama 3.5 Chilli Peppers 
• The Detectorists S2 - Comedy/ Drama 3.5 Chilli Peppers 
• Sabrina the Teenage Witch - Horror 3.5 Chilli Peppers 
• Wellington Paranormal - Horror/Comedy 3.5 Chilli Peppers 
• The Kominsky Method - Drama/ Comedy 3.5 Chilli Peppers 

Gimme a high five, a kiss on the cheek and a slap on the arse - work has officially ended! I have now happily navigated (and survived) the Christmas Staff Party, the work place Kris Kringle certificate exchange and the obligatory tipples, cheerful chatter and tears of goodbye that come with all end of year farewells and the much anticipated and fiercely coveted Summer holiday escape. All of my Christmas work events were thoroughly enjoyable, as one would expect when you work with a group of wonderful people, and I was sweetly touched by the outpouring of love and care that everyone in my school community shared with each other over this busy and genuinely exhausting time of the year.
The children (literally dead on their feet by the final stroke of the clock) showered me with much thanks, many hugs and a ridiculously generous cascade of gifts that were both greatly appreciated and overwhelmingly touching; highlighting all of the reasons that the slog is always worthwhile and that we do indeed change tiny minds everyday for the better. It would be more than fair to say that Christmas definitely came early for me. I don't even need to open another gift now, I have already been insanely spoilt and my ego has had a mighty good fluffing up from the many compliments and thanks that the children's parents (who did not hold back their gratitude or appreciations) happily gave to me. 
And so now I move onto more personal affairs, as today I brave the supermarket hordes to shop for my pre-Christmas get togethers and my family Christmas Day lunch. And even though I know that the supermarket is going to resemble a looting escapade during a zombie apocalypse, this is truly a labour of love now and I will undertake it with a lot of thought and loving devotion, because after all, it is Christmas time and therefore an excellent opportunity to spoil your loved ones and indulge in the finer things in life without feeling guilty. 
I have my menu planned, my shopping list written and I have purposely set aside Christmas Eve to prepare desserts and spend some time with Zoe and Seth swanning about the kitchen cooking up some delicious Christmas fare. I like to do all of the hard work and as much of the preparations before Christmas so that on the day I just have to load up the oven and grab a glass of bubbly. No-one should be slaving away in a kitchen on Christmas Day, that is just downright criminal. The load on the day has to be shared; the kids will dress the table (which Zoe has a turned into an art form), I will fill the oven and carve the roasted beasts, we will all do a little dusting and turning out of pre-prepared sweet treats, Seth will organise some appropriate and festive mood music and Craig, as he always does, will provide a jug of good gravy which he makes with the precision of a surgeon. And voila - we will have ourselves a merry little Christmas family gathering. Nothing more to do on the day but pop open the crackers and enjoy a relaxed meal together, which now that I have written about, am getting very excited for.
​Come on Christmas, I am ready for you to arrive!