I have been on more than my fair share of great holidays. I have been on planes, trains, ships, trams, boats, buses and even elephants as a means to get around, but I have to say that some of the best holidays that I have ever had in my life have involved road tripping. There is nothing like a road trip to get your senses going and your interests flowing and in my opinion, road tripping may well be the best way to spend your holiday time. 
A road trip gives you loads more time to reflect, stop and smell the flowers. You can literally pull over and get your fill of the landscape at any time. And unlike being stuck in a tour group or on some other vessel that is just going from A to B, a road trip allows you to go at your own pace and take as many detours as you like. Every road sign is a potential adventure and an opportunity to take in something new or explore another area.
You don't have to go far to have a road trip adventure either. A road trip can last a day, a weekend, a week, a month or however long you want to take your holiday for. You can pursue a road trip in your own country (Australia has the best road trip opportunities - so blessed here) or you can plan to travel abroad. Craig and I road tripped from Germany to Italy in a car and it was nothing short of amazing, we also road tripped France and England together, we've taken our family and road tripped across the North Island of New Zealand and I have done short road trips to Sydney and Canberra with my kids as well and I can honestly say that all of those holidays were easily some of the best that we have ever had. 
Another great thing about road tripping is that it is a cheaper and more convenient form of travel than any other transport and as long as your car is in pretty good working order, it's super easy as well. Just fill up your tank and go, any day at any time. You can literally head off at any given moment to explore the countryside and decide where to stay as you go. We usually stay at Airbnb's which is generally a pretty cheap option, but if you've got a caravan or an RV, well that's even easier and cheaper as well.
The thing that I love best about a road tripping is the complete freedom of it. I love blasting my favourite playlists and singing up my tunes, making memories and sharing special moments with my family, operating outside of any schedules or work commitments and just being in the moment 100%. An open and unknown road really can give you all of that. And let's not forget that incredible feeling that you get when you come home after a couple of weeks on the road and you have totally reinvigorated your awareness around how amazing your life and your home actually are. A road trip definitely heightens your awareness, not only to the amazing adventures that you've enjoyed but also around how incredible it is to return to the comfort of your home after the fact. 
Yes, I really do love to go road tripping and having adventures on the holidays, but for me there really is no place like home, and for that reason I know that I am definitely not made for a full time nomadic existence, no matter how much the open road beckons to me. 

NOMADLAND
Release Date: 2021
Rating: M 
Running Time: 107 mins 
An American drama film written, edited, produced and directed by Chloé Zhao and based on the 2017 non-fiction book Nomadland: Surviving America in the Twenty-First Century by Jessica Bruder. I think that being based on a non-fiction book has made this movie feel very authentic, in fact the entire movie plays out just as a documentary would. There are even real life nomads (Linda May, Swankie and Bob Wells) all portraying fictionized versions of themselves here which really adds a lot of depth and credence to the tale. 
Over the course of a year we follow Fern (Frances McDormand), a reclusive nomadic woman who is mourning the loss of her husband and traveling across America in an old camper van. Along the way we experience the highs and lows of Fern's voyage through the people that she encounters on the road, the impermanent work that she undertakes and the places that she visits along the way. 
Nomadland won the Best Motion Picture - Drama and Best Director awards at the 78th Golden Globe Awards, however I think that it is the incredible sweeping landscapes and cinematography that make this film truly unmissable.  I definitely recommend viewing Nomadland on a big screen if you can,  however be warned, the lure to jump into an RV and hit the open road is somewhat overwhelming and you may find yourself planning your next road trip after seeing this. 
FINAL SAY: I'll see you down the road.
4 Chilli Peppers ​

By definition, mantra is a Sanskrit word that means a sacred utterance of numerous sounds, syllables or words. Many languages have mantras that are believed to hold religious, magical or spiritual powers. In modern and westernised spiritual practises, the word mantra has become the mainstream word for intention, but in truth mantra and intention are quite different.
The word mantra can be broken down into two words. The first being 'man' which means mind and 'tra' which means transport or vehicle. In other words a mantra is an instrument for moving your mind from one state of being into another. It is a way of triggering a shift in your mindset, which is clearly quite different from setting an intention. 
Just like planting a seed into fertile soil to get the best results, when you plant your mantra over and over in your mind you will also get the best results. Basically, you need to shift your consciousness to more abundant patterns of thinking by repeating your mantra to yourself during meditation, times of focus or when the need to 'shift gears' arises. The key to a successful mantra is all in the repetition. 
When you undertake a course in transcendental meditation with a qualified practitioner, you are given a personal mantra which is usually in the form of a 2 or 3 syllable chant. However, you don't have to go to a professional to set yourself a mantra or chant, you just have to find a saying, sound or group of words that transport your mind to a better or higher frequency of thinking and feeling. 
I have had many mantras over the years. Some have been short and sweet and yet still very effective like "I am strong" "I am focused" and "I can let go." Others have been chants or chimes, bells or transcendental vibration noises. Most recently I have adopted the following mantra:
"Where attentions goes, energy flows"
I say the first three words on the inhale and the last two on the exhale when meditating. However, I have used this mantra to help others as well by gently reminding them about what they are pouring their energy into and whether it deserves as much of their attention and energy as they are giving it. I say this to myself when I feel like I am entering a power struggle, beginning to play into some else's drama or getting caught up in  negative thought patterns about someone else, myself or a situation. 
At the end of the day, a mantra is supposed to bring you back to simplicity, which if done correctly, will support you in protecting your energy as well, which is what I wrote about in my last blog post. We live in a complex world and it is so easy to get lost in all of the details. Having a mantra can help you to keep circling back to a simplistic approach to life and to help you to focus on those things that inspire and truly make you happy, so why not give it a go and create your own mantra, what have you got to lose? 

BLACK IS KING
Release Date: 2020
Rating: M
Running Time: 85 mins 
There is no disputing that Beyoncé is not everyone's cup of tea, but after Lemonade I was more than willing to have a look at Black is King and I was definitely not disappointed. 
A musical and visual album that was directed, written and produced by Beyoncé herself, the film serves as a visual companion to the 2019 album The Lion King: The Gift, a tie-in album curated by Beyoncé for The Lion King. 
The story revolves around a young African prince that is exiled from his kingdom after his father passes away. When he becomes a man, he embarks on a journey to discover his true identity and purpose. He is protected and guided by his ancestors and eventually reclaims his rightful place upon the throne again. 
The music, dances, costumes, themes and sets are all simply divine and the overall experience is a complete transcendence into sight, sound and spirit. There is a lot to love here, and if like me you are a fan of artistic expression and creativity, you will love this as well. 
FINAL SAY: Find Your Way
​4 Chilli Peppers ​

I try to be zen about things. Sometimes being zen means setting boundaries so that you can protect your energy. This is not a selfish thing to do, it's wise and wonderful. If you protect your energy then you will have more in the tank for the things that you find most important. You will be able to prioritize better, focus more and generally stay in the zen zone, even when things are hardly zen at all. 
The other day I forgot to meditate. Not that big of a deal, I just got super busy and forgot to sit down and turn on my timer on insight and record my meditation effort. I had a super mindful day and was actually zenning out and reflecting quite a bit throughout the day, I just didn't record it. As a consequence of not recording any actual meditation on the app that I use, I lost a 335 day meditation streak on insight timer, and I was so determined to clock 365 days of meditation in a row this year. I was so angry and disappointed with myself for forgetting to sit and turn that app on, I was a bit crushed and pretty peeved. And then I realised that I was pouring way too much energy and emphasis on maintaining my streak of consecutive days rather than the actual act of meditation.
It was almost like I was being given the ultimate test of shifting my focus from the consecutive streak day stats to the actual act of meditating and letting go. Well, I don't actually have to let go of the goal, I can still aim to reach 365 consecutive days of meditation, it's just going to take me a while longer now and hey, I've made my peace with that and it's totally okay. However, when I first realised that I had lost my streak I never for a second stopped to think about just how amazing it was to get to 335 consecutive days of meditation, I just looked at it as a personal failure.
Staying zen when things don't turn out the way that you had hoped or planned that they would is probably one of the most challenging things that any of us will ever face.  And that's why it's crucial that you protect your energy, stay focused on what really matters and shake off the setbacks and reframe them as potential areas of growth. Bashing yourself for every error and shortcoming, fighting yourself and others whenever things don't go as planned and struggling to find the big picture are all ways to really burn out your energy and waste your time. 
Other things that you can be doing on the daily to protect your energy in small but significant ways are:

• Not answering the phone when you don't want to talk.
• Replying to text messages when it suits you.
• Speaking kindly to yourself when you're dealing with uncomfortable feelings.
• Waking up earlier to ground yourself before the day gets busy.
• Letting go and not feeling like you need to fight to be right.
• Choosing your battles wisely - knowing when to hold them and when to fold them. 
• Leaving events, conversations and interactions when your energy is being drained (peacefully stepping away).
• Knowing that putting yourself first every now and then is not selfish, it's smart.
• Taking time to restore, relax and reflect every day. 

Don't allow situations, other people or setbacks dictate how your day, week, month or year are going to pan out. Protect your energy and be kind to yourself daily. Don't let the little things hijack your amygdala, you are the only one who can determine how your energy is going to be used, so take control and covet it. Don't waste it, channel your unique and beautiful energy into being a better and more balanced you.

POSSESSOR
Release Date: 2020
Rating: R 18+
Running Time: 103 mins 
A science fiction horror film written and directed by Brandon Cronenberg. Let me start by saying that this film is not an easy watch. Just like his father David Cronenberg, Brandon has his gore levels set to stun. I saw the uncut version and although this is a truly stylish and engaging sci-fi horror, it is also extremely graphic and violent so I feel compelled to offer a caution to viewers of a sensitive nature around the confronting material in this movie. 
In an alternate 2008, Tasya Vos - an assassin with the capability to control other people's bodies, undertakes another big job. However, this time when Vos enters her host's body to perform the hit, there are complications and things rapidly spiral out of control. 
The acting, storyline and effects are so mesmerising in Possessor, which makes the unrelentingly aggression and violence a little more tolerable. I really enjoyed the gripping ending and loved the overall feel of this eerie 'body snatching' movie. And maybe I'm losing my edge as I get older by saying this, but some of the intensely violent kill scenes just felt a bit unnecessary and in my opinion, could've been scaled back without sacrificing the integrity of the film in any way. But that's just me, see it and decide for yourself. 
FINAL SAY: Pull me out.
3.5 Chilli Peppers ​

Another five day lockdown has been enforced for the state of Victoria, which is now the third of its kind and the first for 2021. A very large part of me was strongly hoping and dare I say it....praying, that the days of formal lockdowns were finally behind us. With the vaccine on the way I even allowed myself to feel a bit of release from all of the COVID-19 worries and concerns, but obviously I was wrong. 
When your state Premiere calls a full lockdown that will start in less than 12 hours, you do tend to get nervous, very nervous. And it would be fair to say that some people did appear to go into instant shock, spontaneous worry and some even went right back into toilet paper hording mode as well.  And although this can only be described as inconvenient for most of us, for some us this five day lockdown is actually deeply problematic. 
If you had a wedding or funeral to attend this weekend than this recent lockdown would've been devastating. If you had tickets for an event or had a big soiree planned then this would be fricken' annoying and if you are the sort of person that plays out a million worse case scenarios when things like this occur then this would be a seriously disturbing time for you.  I am pretty certain that there have been a billion inconveniences created by yet another lockdown. 
However, let's try to flip this and find some positives. Firstly, this new, mutant, highly contagious mother load COVID strain that is currently getting around is a killer - even more then the original strain and that's the one that we are locking down for. Worth doing? Yes, it's worth doing, we all know that isolation saves lives, so we are doing our bit to take care of ourselves and others when we comply to these lockdown scenarios. I have faith that Dan Andrews and his medical advisory team wouldn't make this call unless it was imperative and in our best interests, so okay, I'm going with the flow there.
Secondly, at this stage it is only five days. Now I know that's easy to say when I'm not missing out or sacrificing anything major and I don't want to minimize anyone else's struggle, but for most of us - ITS ONLY 5 DAYS - get over it! After being in lockdown for months, this feels like a walk in the park, very manageable and totally okay for the most part. Fingers crossed that it doesn't turn out to be more than 5 days now that I've said all that, but at this moment, I'm going with what I know. 
Also, for a lot of people this latest lockdown will actually just look like a five day weekend.  Not for everyone of course and definitely not for me, but for some people this is going to be a high five moment where a little lockdown time just offers them the chance to rest, reboot and restart their engines for 2021. And to those people I say - you lucky bastards! Enjoy the time  and be gracious and respectful about the way that you have received the time because this is not a time of celebration for everyone. 
And if you still can't find a positive from any of that, then I suggest that you spend some time focusing on the things that you can control  rather than the things that you cannot. What the hell does that mean? Well, I mean rather than getting all worked up over the latest state of affairs which you have absolutely no power or control over anyway, why don't you turn your thoughts around onto yourself and consider the things that you can manage, even from a lockdown perspective.
Things like:

• How you react to people and situations
• What you eat
• How you treat yourself and your body
• Who you spend you time with
• What you put your energy into
• How clean your home is
• How you speak to yourself and others 
• How much sleep you get
• Your morning routine
• What you do in your spare time
• How much exercise you get
• Your thoughts, hopes, dreams and aspirations

These challenging times can actually be a wonderful time for some introspection and contemplation, so why not try and shift your mindset and consider seeing things from a whole new angle. 

THE DIG
Release Date: 2021 
Rating: PG
Running Time: 112 mins 
A British period drama directed by Australian film and theatre director Simon Stone and based on the 2007 novel of the same name by John Preston. The Dig, released by Netflix, delivers a delightful true story adaptation of an important archaeological dig and the events and people that surrounded the excavation. 
An historically important dig is occurring in the quiet township of Sutton Hoo, Britain in 1938; coinciding with the commencement of WW2. The lives of those involved with the excavation become swept up in the celebration, drama and trepidation of the time, whilst also dealing with their own personal struggles. 
Carey Mulligan and Ralph Fiennes give stellar portrayals of the real life stakeholders Edith Pretty and Basil Brown and the superb English countryside makes for a most beautiful backdrop. The cinematography is exceptionally good here thanks to Mike Eley's keen eye and many of the shots are so perfectly executed that it almost feels like a piece of art. 
Overall, I was pleasantly surprised by The Dig not only for it's terrific performances and visual appeal but also for its genuinely wholesome and interesting script which is a combination of story telling that I don't see as often as I would like to. 
FINAL SAY: From the first human handprint on a cave wall, we're part of something continuous. 
3.5 Chilli Peppers ​

There are a couple of things that always tell me that the long and greatly coveted Summer holiday break is rapidly drawing to a close. The first of those is Australia Day because the return to work for all people working in the education sector will generally occur within a day of this annual event. This year, educators return the day after that public holiday which means that it will not be a good day for tipples or overindulging of any fashion because that first week back is always hella challenging after such a lengthy respite. 
The second red flag event for me is the annual Triple J Hottest 100 which I listen to religiously every year and again falls just before the dreaded end of Summer vacation. This year the Hottest 100 happened yesterday, heralding a foreshadowing and awareness that my days of self indulgence and pleasure seeking are rapidly coming to a close. In short, I have two days left of Summer break, however on the upside the first week back has been reduced to a very manageable 3 days which is actually quite heavenly and very welcome.
And in spite of COVID-19 still looming about in the shadows like an repugnant stalker I have actually had one of the most relaxing, productive and deeply enjoyable Summer holiday breaks of my life, and my sights are now firmly fixed on making this year - my year to shine! When I say shine, I really don't mean in the spotlight, I mean that this year I really want to feel like I have a better handle on my own wellbeing in every possible way. 
Last year I had my hysterectomy and it felt a lot like of a year of repair for me. I spent a lot of time resting, doing meditation and generally getting myself well and strong again. This year I really want to up my game and add some more things into my everyday regimen that will serve me well in many different ways. Of course I will not be dropping my daily meditation or yoga sessions, that stuff has become non-negotiable for me now and I couldn't imagine not doing those things on the daily. However, this year there are a few other key ingredients that I want to add into the mix, or should I say that I have already added into the mix this year and want to continue to stay committed to doing from here on out. 
They aren't really huge changes, but over a long period of time, they will deliver grow into my life and should make me healthier and happier in the long run. Here is a list of the new things that I have added to my personal regimen and committed to doing for myself  in 2021:

• 10,000 steps a day
• 20- 30 minutes of cardio three times a week 
• 10 -15 minutes of brain training daily (Elevate) 
• 10-15 minutes of learning another language (French) 
• Drink 1.5 litres of water/ herbal tea a day  
• Cut back my alcohol consumption

See these are hardly huge changes, however if you add them to my daily journaling, meditation, yoga, allocated time that I schedule with my children, husband, mother and friends, as well as my blog and my volunteer job, well its getting pretty busy right? Wrong, it's actually pretty manageable, well it's been manageable but I haven't been at work and I think that trying to fit these extra few things in once I am back is going to require a little more effort, especially at either ends of the day. However, I am up for the challenge and very determined use the time that I have wisely. And anyway, if things don't fit well and it's a total car crash well...that's okay too because I can always go back to the drawing board and revamp. 
Let's hope I am writing a blog about the successes of my extra self commitments over the coming weeks and not about navigating the pitfalls of an over scheduled life - but hey I will keep you posted about that, watch this space!

ON THE ROCKS
Release Date: 2020
Rating: M 
Running Time: 96 mins 
A comedy/drama written and directed by Sofia Coppola that delivers a short, sweet tale about a father-daughter relationship. Not nearly as memorable as Coppola's previous endeavours, On the Rocks is a much lighter and more mainstream approach than we have seen in previous times, however it still has Coppola's keen eye for excellent male-female relationship dynamics all over it, which makes it quite enjoyable. 
Laura (Rashida Jones) has a growing suspicion that her husband who travels a lot for work may be engaging in an affair.  She confides her concerns in her father Felix (Bill Murray) who decides that her husband is clearly cheating and the two set out on a covert mission to discover the truth. 
Jones and Murray are truly great here together with a deeply plausible onscreen connection and a good smattering of humour which really elevates the story greatly. Sure it's no game changer, but it is a fun exploration of child/parent bonds, marriage and fidelity.  
FINAL SAY: It must be very nice to be you. 
3 Chilli Peppers ​

The meter is running on your life, right now, in this very moment, in every moment that you have ever lived and breathed, it has been running.  When a meter is running we know that it means that a cost or expense is accumulating urging us to make a decision or pay the fare. However, when it comes to our actual lives, we rarely if ever consider the amount of time that we have already used up or how much we still have on the meter and at our disposal. 
I am fairly sure that if I told you that your meter was going to run out in say a month, or even six months to a year that you would definitely start to look at your life very differently. You'd possibly make some radical changes to the way that you do things, reprioritise your life and desperately try to milk as much out of the time that you left on the meter or even attempt to reverse it or change that outcome somehow. But you would never have done any of that without the threat of your meter running out on you. 
Big surprise here, your meter is actually running out. And I am not saying that to try and make you feel insecure, hysterical or paranoid, I'm telling you because it is completely and utterly true. All of our meters are running out, they were from the day that we arrived. Mine is, yours is,  everyone's is. None of us, not even the rich, famous and intellectual are going to be able to cheat the sands of time and no-one in the history of all of humanity has been able to live forever. Unfortunately, we all have an expiry date and although that is going to be different for everyone, it is going to be inevitable. 
So, with that in mind let's have a look at how you can enjoy a long and healthy life according to the people that have kept their meters running for so long that they are now called centenarians. Centenarians are people that have lived for 100 years or more, they have survived pandemics, depressions, financial crisis, war and loss; and yet they have emerged almost unscathed, and their resilience offers us all a first hand perspective into the secrets of longevity. Unsurprisingly, there really are some very common dominators in the lives of all centenarians and I believe that these commonalities are clearly the recipe for a long life and a great way to keep your own meter running. 
​Firstly, people who have lived long lives have been cheerful most of their lives. Sure, you can't avoid getting burnt by life every now and again and even the best of us face financial difficulty, loss, illness, failed relationships and stress, but it is how we deal with those setbacks that determines our happiness. Most centenarians have supportive families and friends and a community around them that they are actively involved in. They have powerful, protective social structures that buffer and care for them. So the work that you do to build meaningful relationships with your family and friends is never wasted time, it's actually essential to your own longevity. 
Most centenarians claim that they have managed to stay cheerful by never comparing themselves to others. They all have positive mindsets that are devoid of jealousy, envy and resentment. They are living their best lives every day and taking joy in all of the little things and not getting hung up on the petty stuff. They also swear by removing toxic relationships from their lives. People who are not trustworthy should go first, followed by anyone that continuously hurts your feelings, belittles you or makes you feel unlovable. It's very simple really, only keep people in your life that lift you up, respect and value you as you are, otherwise they will be a scourge on your life meter. 
No surprises here, but centenarians also have a healthy diet, however they also like to consumed one or two alcoholic beverages a day, usually as a night cap of some sort. They all imbibe in moderation, never overindulge and rarely, if ever, smoke. None of them have ever had a gym membership but all of them have lead very active lifestyles. Most centenarians walk every day, some of them still taking up to 10,000 steps a day. Most of them take in other regular gentle exercise like swimming, yoga or tai chi and generally keep busy by tending to their own yards, doing their own shopping and maintaining their own homes. 
Almost all centenarians have hobbies that give them pleasure. Undertaking something relaxing and enjoyable that you do without looking for gain or return is paramount to these people's lives. And finally, they all kept a tight budget and never, ever spent more than they earned. A lot of them have never even owned a credit card and have always saved for a rainy day.  Being financially sound and not having to worry about money is a great way to keep stress levels low and to eliminate unnecessary worry  and uncertainly about the future. 
However, let's be honest, there is really no one way to ensure that your meter will keep running for a very long time because life is risky and unpredictable and all any of us can really do is hope for the best and try to be our best. However, there is no denying that the recipe for long life outlined above by our beloved centenarians certainly does seem like a great and logical place to start if you are trying to get more mileage on the meter.
​Whether you adopt or adapt any of these tips is of course completely up to you, and no matter your choices, I do wish you all a long, prosperous and healthy life with a meter that runs for at least 100 years or more!

PROMISING YOUNG WOMAN
Release Date: 2021
Rating: MA 15+ 
Running Time: 113 mins 
An American crime thriller that was written, produced and directed by Emerald Fennell in her feature directorial debut. This boldly provocative thriller received generally favourable critical acclaim for it's dynamic writing and Carey Mulligan's committed and strong portrayal of a woman that has been wronged. 
Cassie Thomas (Mulligan) is exacting her revenge upon the people that were involved in a vicious attack on her best friend and she is also taking down a few other douche bags along the way. 
It's the terrific mix of dark humour and appallingly abhorrent assholes getting their comeuppances that makes this film so great. Mulligan is at her absolute best here as Cassie, a character that has tenacity and personality in bucket loads and it was just so fantastic to see a female delivering some kick arse vengeance in such colourful and unique ways. 
The supporting cast are also strong here with Bo Burnham, Alison Brie, Laverne Cox and Clancy Brown all rounding out the story and making it something genuinely memorable and deeply affecting. 
FINAL SAY: Can you guess what every woman's worst nightmare is?
4 Chilli Peppers ​

In order to be free and completely unburdened, we must be able to embrace our whole self. Easier said than done when you live a world that praises perfection over humility, accepts self mutilation as a form of beauty and makes people strive for basic rights like equality and acceptance on the daily. However, even in a tainted world like ours it is still possible to find an acceptance of the self and the ability to embrace the power and freedom that comes with that. But how? How can you truly embrace your whole self without glancing over your shoulder, questioning yourself or second guessing yourself? Well, the secret to that lies in finding the things about yourself that are worth celebrating and focusing on those.
When it comes to embracing the whole self, first and fore mostly you have to focus on how far you've already come in this life rather than how far you believe that you still have to go. Instead of comparing yourself to anyone else, compare yourself to your old self. By doing that you will start to gain a very clear picture about how much you have changed. Who were you ten years ago? Five year ago? Or even one year ago? Odds are that you have done some pretty significant evolving, you'll not be the same person that you were and you will have learned a lot along the way.
You may have grown physically stronger, collected more skills, gained better health or wellbeing, become a kinder and more patient person, the potential list is endless really. However, I guarantee that if you really start to look, you'll see that you have actually come quite a long way and you are definitely a better version of yourself now that you used to be. Breathe that in for a minute and think about what that is going to look like in another year from now, or in five years or ten years, assuming that you stay on the same trajectory.  Pretty good right? You're on your way, embrace that. Being able to focus on how far you've come is the beginning of embracing of the self. 
Next, and I know that I've said this before, but I'm saying it again, get rid of the word perfect and replace it with better. Striving to be better is plausible, admirable and healthy and will bring you closer to embracing yourself than any push for perfection. Perfection is bullshit, it does not exist. No matter how far you get, the bar will just continue to raise if you are seeking perfection. You will constantly feel inadequate and you will find yourself on a treadmill of comparison and disenchantment. If you are striving for perfection in your life right now, please stop immediately. Aim for self improvement instead. Go ahead and improve your station, work hard on you and you'll see that you will gain a lot more confidence and self worth if you aim for better over perfect. 
Once you've done that, then it is time to embrace your power, your individual power, the one that you were born with. You do have power, quite a lot of it actually. You have your own set of unique abilities, talents and skills. Why there is no-one else on the entire planet that is identical to you, you're an original, a one of a kind masterpiece and you have passion, purpose and ambition to ignite in this world. As Dr Seuss said, there is no-one  alive who is more youer that you. And that is so true and beautiful and 100% worth embracing.
When you embrace your individual power, you'll find that you will unlock your goals and visions for your own future. Finding what makes you feel alive will do that and if you're lucky you might even get to live your passion daily and even make money from doing it. However, it might be a hobby or talent that you do part time that ignites your power and that is just as good. When you are doing something that you feel passionate about in the world you will also be embracing your whole self, perhaps without realising that you are. And that is because you will be embodying your authentic self.
Your authentic self is at the core of who you are and it is actually made up of a whole lot of really cool things. Things that you probably forget that you have in your tool kit a lot of the time. Whether you realise it or not, your authentic self is pure hearted, kind, empathetic, interested and understanding. You authentic self doesn't compare or complain or compete, why would it? Your authentic self is confident, calm and clear minded because it feels embraced and accepted. So allow yourself to be your authentic self, embrace the whole truth of who you really are, embrace your individual power and embrace the amazing journey that you've already made thus far. If you can do that, then you will be living your best life every damn day. And you know that you deserve to, so dare to embrace your whole self and raise your vibration, take your whole self to the next level. 

SWALLOW
Release Date: 2020
Rating: R 18+
Running Time: 94 mins
An unforgettably affecting independent psychological film that was written and directed by Carlo Mirabella-Davis. Swallow seeks to explore a very real affliction called pica, a psychological disorder that compels sufferers to consume indigestible objects. 
Beautiful and passive Hunter has just married a wealthy CEO and her new life affords her the luxury of not having to work, lots of free time and extra money at her disposal. However, after swallowing a marble one day, Hunter feels exhilarated and begins to consume more and more inedible objects, eventually putting her life and that of her unborn child in danger.  
Be warned, this movie is really hard to watch at times. Between the main characters obsession with swallowing harmful objects and the appalling treatment and lack of emotional support that she receives from the people around her, this film just goes from bad to worse. 
Haley Bennett's performance of Hunter is Oscar nomination worthy and she projects the immaculately groomed 'Stepford wife' persona hiding a deep secret so well that it is downright eerie. Swallow certainly provides us with a glimpse into the strange and disturbing world of pica sufferers and will be a film that I won't ever forget seeing. 
FINAL SAY: Are you happy, or are you pretending to be happy? 
3 Chilli Peppers ​

After what I can only describe as one of the most wonderful and enjoyable Christmases of my entire life, I have found myself in the quiet in-between days that fall after Christmas and before the arrival of another New Year. And boy do I ever love the few days that fall between the 26th and the 31st of December, it is pretty much my favourite time of the the year for so many reasons. 
Firstly, just about everyone is on holidays so there is a really laid back vibe to those six days that you don't get at any other time of the year. People are chilling out, they are all living their best lives and all of the frantic 'must get done before Christmas' stresses have been tossed aside and replaced with afternoon tipples, sleep ins, joyful time wasting and a general decompression of the past year.
Also, the weather is usually pretty lovely which offers everyone room in their lives for picnics, long walks, outdoorsy explorations, BBQ's, star gazing, novels in hammocks and long relaxed conversations at any given moment. You never feel guilty for wasting time because you're off the clock and time suddenly becomes completely irrelevant, it's absolutely heavenly! 
And lastly, but certainly not least of all, because you just got gifted a whole bunch of new things you feel like a totally spoilt rich bitch for a while. You have new things to play and fiddle with, new clothes and jewellery to bling up on and often you'll even some some cash in your pocket to burn. For me, this year was particularly fortuitous and I got spoilt silly by by family and friends beyond anything that I could have imagined, it was both delightful and unexpected but let's not bullshit anyone here, it was also extremely enjoyable. 
So now I happily find myself falling into the quiet in-between days and just like a lazy cat stretching out on a furry rug, it feels amazing! So far, I've been sketching, reviewing films on Spicywatch and binging TV. I've also been listening to audio books, meditating, walking, playing brain training apps, doing 45 minute yoga sessions and having Pisco sour cocktails in the afternoons. Tomorrow I am heading to Melbourne for the first time in over a year because of COVID restrictions and I have plans to spend a couple of days roaming the city with my best friend, visiting the NGV and hitting up Chinatown for Yum-Cha. 
Oh yes it is the most wonderful time of the year! And I hope that you are all equally enjoying the quiet in-between days as much as I am and that you also enjoy a glorious and safe transition from 2020 to 2021. Let's hope that just like the quiet in-between days, that it's a gentler and kinder year to us all!

With work officially out of the way for the moment, I can now safely turn my attentions to Christmas. It is time to focus on sharing some special moments with loved ones and indulging in all of the best things that life has to offer with my friends and family; and trust me when I say that I have had a pretty good start!
Christmas always brings about an acute awareness of how fortuitous and blessed I am in my life. When you have the means to gift others, eat the most rich and extravagant meals and not have to focus on how you are going to afford to do that, then you're bloody blessed!  And Christmas always makes me feel like I have so much to be grateful for. So for me, it's always an important time to give back, pay forward and make a really grand effort to let others know that I see them, care for them and want to share my time with them.
So far I have had a wonderful Japanese dining experience with my mother, my nephew and his family, I have visited a spectacular winery outside of Geelong with some work friends and indulged in many delicious wines and woodfired pizzas and I have even managed to complete all of my Christmas shopping, write all of my Christmas cards and wrap all of my gifts - so underneath my Christmas tree is now jam packed with goodies to share and enjoy with everyone. Yep, it's beginning to look a lot like Christmas and I am getting excited, not just about sharing some quality time with my darlings but also about all of the delicious fare that I am going to get to eat! 
Christmas food should be delicious in my opinion. Your Christmas meal should comprise of something that you've put some effort into creating and is worthy of sharing with your loved ones.  For me this year, it will be a perfectly roasted pork belly with all of the jazzy roast trimmings and for dessert a fabulous family favourite, a chocolate cake that is a combination of cake and pavlova and tastes like heaven.  I will spend time prepping on Christmas Eve, and it will not be a chore, not even in the slightest, it will be a pleasure. And to top it all off I will make a couple of Christmas cocktails to enjoy throughout the day. 
Nothing says 'Christmas in the summertime' like a good Christmas tipple, and this year I think that it will be about pimping up the Prosecco and making some Christmas themed Cosmopolitans. So here are the recipes that I will be using if you need a little tipple inspiration yourself. And please do make sure that you enjoy a very merry, bright, special and magical Christmas with your loved ones this year. 
May the season be kind to you and all of yours; and cheers to you all!
CHRISTMAS COSMOPOLITAN
Half of a pomegranate
40mls vodka
10mls Triple Sec
15mls Lime juice
I orange to serve.
Fill a shaker with ice, squeeze the pomegranate juice through your fingers, then add everything else except the orange. Shake well, strain into a martini glass and garnish with a strip of orange. 
PIMPED-UP PROSECCO
I orange
Half a lime
A good squeeze of pomegranate juice
Half a passionfruit
Quarter of a grapefruit
A splash of elderflower cordial
I bottle of Prosecco
Squeeze the orange, lime and grapefruit into a jug. Add the cordial, pomegranate juice and Prosecco. Scoop the pulp from the passionfruit half into the jug and stir. Serve in chilled champagne flutes. 

​IT'S A WONDERFUL LIFE
Release Date: 1946
Rating: PG
Running Time: 130 mins 
Based on the short story "The Greatest Gift" by Phillip Van Doren Stern, this vintage Christmas fantasy drama from Frank Capra has become traditional viewing during the Christmas season and has won a place in thousands of hearts since it's release in the 1940's. 
The story revolves around George Bailey (James Stewart), a man who is contemplating suicide on Christmas Eve. His guardian angel Clarence intervenes by showing George what his community would look like if he had never existed. 
Although the movie wasn't a box office smash when it was released, in spite of it's five Academy Award nominations, it has since gone on to be recognized by the American Film Institute as one of the 100 best American films ever made.
And, it is true, this is certainly an inspiring and touching story, that will bring a tear to your eye and restore your faith in humanity around Christmas time. It's a Wonderful Life is a magnificent and uplifting classic that has a wholesome moral message, making it a perfect and squeaky clean viewing choice for the entire family. 
FINAL SAY: Remember, George: no man is a failure if he has friends. 
3.5 Chilli Peppers

There is absolutely nothing wrong with wanting more out of life. In fact you really should want more out of life; I mean why in the bloody hell wouldn't you want as much as you can get out of this life? You literally get one go around, one chance, one shot at making your very best life a reality, so why wouldn't you want it to be as amazing as it could be and get as much out of it as you can?
It is reasonably safe to assume that everyone does want to get as much as life as they can, however from my experience and observations it would appear that most people are generally quite happy to settle for mediocre or even average life experiences and I believe that this is mostly because of a lack of funds or a lack of motivation or a lack of bravery or some kind of combination of all of those things. 
Well, I am here to tell you that you do not need a lot of money, bravery or motivation to get a lot more bang for your buck when it comes to life experiences. All you need is a simple plan to raise your standards. It's that easy, just raise your standards. Now before you close this tab down on your laptop and proclaim Spicywatch to be a huge load of malarkey, just hear me out. By raising your standards you will actually be raising your expectations of yourself and of others, you will be forced to stop making excuses and you will become more focused, brave, motivated and hopefully more wealthy as well if you can commit to those new standards. 
So what do I mean when I say raise your standards? What I mean is to level yourself up by doing things that establish you in the world as a go getter that doesn't put up with any rubbish. Some simple but excellent ways to raise your standards immediately could be to do something like.....

• Showing up 20 minutes early for work
• Getting rid of a toxic relationship
• Quitting junk food
• Getting off social media
• Walking away from negative people 
• Reading more
• Cultivating your growth mindset 
• Creating a budget and starting to save
• Starting an exercise regimen
• Shutting down thoughts about the past and future
• Developing your creativity 
• Quitting complaining 
• Following through on everything that you say that you're going to do
• Being of service to others 
• Quitting alcohol and cigarettes
• Having a strong work ethic 
• Not tolerating bullshit
• Becoming environmentally and sustainably aware
• Starting to meditate
• Sleeping well

In short, the quality of your life is a direct reflection of your standards. Wanting to live an impeccable life starts with raising your standards so that you begin to expect more from yourself. In this life we can only get what we truly believe that we deserve, so by raising your standards you will achieve more and get more enjoyment out of life, it's a fact. However, it is also important to be realistic and to try not to strive for perfection or the unattainable. Raising your standards is not about be perfect, its about being the best version of yourself for yourself. Never raise your standards to gain approval from anyone else, raise them to enjoy a more enlightened and complete version of who you are. 
Live your best life, be true to who you are, keep moving forward and remember that you deserve to be living fully and completely. So work out what the best version of you actually looks like and raise your standards to meet that. Create, learn, reflect and improve...raise your standards and aim for your version of greatness.

SAVE YOURSELVES!
Release Date: 2020
Rating: M
Running Time: 93 mins 
A millennial couple escape the city and head to a secluded country retreat in an attempt to reignite their relationship, go off grid for a week and hopefully become 'better people' by communing with nature. However, the week that they decide to embark on this new endeavour unfortunately corresponds with a hostile alien take over of planet Earth. 
Written and directed by Alex Huston Fischer and Eleanor Wilson, Save Yourselves! delivers a surprisingly  quirky, fresh and genuinely funny sci-fi comedy that is just as much about relationships as it is about pouf shaped fluffy aliens. Sunita Mani and John Reynold are what makes this film so great, with their plausible onscreen chemistry and everyday approach to crazy situations, they just may be the cutest movie couple of 2020. 
For some easy laughs and light hearted amusing entertainment, Save Yourselves! should not be missed. 
FINAL SAY: Pouf on the roof!
3.5 Chilli Peppers ​

To find out what you're truly passionate about you should ask yourself "what would I do if I knew that I couldn't fail?" This question will allow your deepest desires to bubble to the surface. You'll be able to make a list of all of the things that you've always wanted to do but were too afraid to because you were worried that you wouldn't be good enough or successful enough to make a living out of doing them. Unfortunately for me, this list is extremely long because I usually have a deep longing to change up my profession every couple of years or so but rarely have the guts (or the means) to actually do it. 
If I knew for sure that I couldn't fail, then I am pretty sure that by now I would have:

• Fixed all of the global warming problems. 
• Written a best selling novel.
• Written travel guides for many countries that I had extensively travelled through. 
• Published an anthology of surprisingly excellent drunk poetry.
• Started up a successful yoga studio.
• Become a successful freelance photographer. 
• Solved world hunger forever. 
• Travelled the world as a meditation teacher.
• Become a professional and very respected movie reviewer with my own TV series. 
• Provided clean, sustainable drinking water for everyone in the world.
• Painted something kick arse that is hanging in a very important gallery. 
• Invented a cure for cancer, and COVID-19 as well!

I mean that all sounds do-able right? Well, okay I'll admit that a few them are a huge stretch for sure, but if you knew that you couldn't fail then why wouldn't you set your sights on the big stuff? You would. However, hidden amidst all of that God like longing, there are actually some things that I could still do if I wasn't too chicken shit to put myself out there. Writing a novel, opening a yoga studio and publishing my drunk poetry (albeit maybe not so surprisingly excellent) are all actually pretty achievable and better yet, I wouldn't necessarily have to give up my day job to achieve those dreams. 
And the truth is that you can't really fail if you are going after the life that you really want anyway. If you are putting one foot in front of the other to make your dreams and aspirations a reality, then I don't think that you could ever really be regarded as a failure. Everyone knows that the greatest disappointments in life are created when people never take any risks or put themselves out there to shoot for something that they really desire. Deep down we are terrified of arriving at retirement age wishing that we had tried a little harder or risked a little more to experience more joy and fulfilment from our lives. How does that saying go - In twenty years from now, you'll be more disappointed by the things you didn't do than by the ones that you did do. So I think that you have to be willing to throw off the bowlines and sail away from safe harbour if that's what it takes, but remember that you don't have to just YOLO it either, you can have a strategy plan and go about it in smart ways.
Here's how I always get started on any new undertaking, goal, life choice or intention:
Analyses Your Life Decisions: Take stock and see what has led you to where you are so far. Have you always been leading your own choices or have you been influenced by others?
Determine Your Purpose: A short statement about why you wake up everyday.
Determine Your Values: What are the 5 most important things in your life. These will become your decision filter. 
Set an Intention/Goal: Consider your values and set your intentions for your future that will help bring these things into being and improve your wellbeing. 
Allocate Your Resources: Start thinking about your resources (time, money, energy) to work towards reaching your goals. You'll need to make some choices here and potentially give up something that you are currently doing. 
Track Everything: Data will help you to stay on track and make better choices.
Rinse and Repeat: It may take you many attempts to get to the right path for you. That's cool - life has a funny way of altering that path as well, so be prepared to rework, revisit and reboot  and remember to be kind to yourself along the way. 
And above all else, be strong, fight for what you want and go after your dreams. Life is too short to not take risks and do what you really want to do, so undertake your ambitions like you can't fail, no matter how crazy it might seem.

​KUNG POW! ENTER THE FIST
Release Date: 2002
Rating: M
Running Time: 81 mins 
This movie got an absolute slamming from the critics who clearly missed the fact that it is meant to be utterly bonkers and that is what makes it so damn funny! Writer-director Steve Oedekerk acquired the rights to a little known 1976 Hong Kong karate movie called "Savage Killers," then he seamlessly blended portions of the original movie with new material and dialogue to create one of the most off-the-wall and insanely silly comedies that has ever been made. 
Chosen One, a rough-around-the-edges, yet industrious martial arts master, is out to avenge his murdered family, and it is zany hilarity that ensues all the way. 
Oedekerk wrote, directed and starred in the lead role of Kung Pow! Enter the Fist  and digitally placed himself into the old movie and had all of the main character voices redubbed as well. And the result is not only clever, it is also extremely funny and I literally cry laughing every time that I watch it, and I have seen it three times now! You will either love it or hate it, I hope like me, that you will feel the Kung Pow love!  
FINAL SAY: Chosen One! Wee-ooh, wee-ooh! 
3.5 Chilli peppers

Yesterday it snowed here, really snowed. Not just a light sprinkling but a genuine layer of snow on the ground. It actually snowed for around two and half hours without stopping which I think is the most that I have ever seen it snow anywhere before, except for that one time when I went skiing at Mount Hotham but you do expect it to snow a lot when you are skiing on a mountain. Anyway, it was really lovely and completely unexpected and best of all I was home to enjoy it. 
My son Seth was with me and at one point while we were both gazing out at the yard in complete raptures he turned to me and said 'God the world is an amazing place isn't it?' To which I had to reply, 'yes...yes it really is.' We sat there for a good 30 minutes not really saying anything, just basking in the wonder of that peaceful falling snow. It was so lovely and it got me thinking about all of the incredible things that I love most about the world, the little things that are easily taken for granted that actually make life pretty great. Little but not at all insignificant things like:

• Looking down on the clouds from a plane window.
• Laughing until you actually cry.
• Eating biscuits that are still warm from the oven. 
• Excellent coffee and a good book in bed on a Sunday morning. 
• The first tingle of sunshine on your shoulders in Summer. 
• Watching the snow fall outside from the comfort of your couch under a blanket. 
• Meditating with your cat napping in your lap. 
• The first BBQ of the Summer.
• Road trips with awesome people to places you've never been before. 
• New art supplies and blank canvases. 
• Eating a piece of fruit that you just picked off a tree, vine or bush. 
• Fresh linen, straight off the line and onto your bed. 
• Hearing a song that gets you or your mood. 
• Galleries, museums, parks and public gardens. 
• Watching electrical storms on the deck with a glass of good whiskey on a Summer night. 
• Meeting people who like the same movies/ TV and or music as you. 
• Smells that spark good memories of people or places. 
• Long, hot, 'thinking time' showers. 
• When the curtains open at the start of a theatre performance. 
• Sunsets, sunrises, full moons and starry nights. 
• A brand new journal at the beginning of a new year.
• Long dinners, cocktails and catch ups with friends. 
• Walking in deciduous forests in Autumn as the leaves fall around you. 
• Collecting wildflowers or wild mushrooms from the bush. 
• Cosy naps and recharging deep sleeps. 
• Watching a really sad movie and having a really good cry. 
• Kisses on the forehead and long hugs. 
• Remembering the really awesome dream that you had last night. 
• ​Laughing about an 'in' joke with a friend or family member. 
• The creak of big old trees moving around on windy days. 
• Looking through old photos with family members and reminiscing. 
• The way that the sand feels under your feet when you stand at the edge of the sea and let the waves roll over the tops of your feet. 

And let's not forget - 
Swings, photo booths, record players, really good croissants, ugg boots, freshly squeezed juice, flowers in the cracks of footpaths, fireworks, trees in blossom, vintage fashion, fresh bread with butter, flannelette PJ's, yoga, bonfires, antique jewellery, bubble baths, comfy sneakers, second hand book stalls, fresh pasta, Fridays, comfy pillows, getting tipsy, waterfalls and mixed lollies. 
Yes, yes and yes! The world really is an amazing place and all of the little things just it make it all the more awesome. I feel completely inspired after writing that list, so think I'll go and do something awesome right now!

This year will be my first Father's Day without my father in the world. It is a strange feeling to not have a father to rally around and celebrate on Father's Day and it makes the day slightly painful in many ways. What it has done is make me remember all of the things that I really loved about my dad and some of the things that I am really missing now that he is no longer with us. 
It's so weird because sometimes I can still be watching a TV show or a movie and I will think to myself - dad would love this, I can't wait to tell him about this; and then I remember that he isn't here anymore and I feel really sad. One thing that I could always have a conversation with my dad about was movies, in fact I believe that a lot of my passion for movies actually derived from my fathers own passion for cinema. My dad loved movies, especially westerns, action films, war films and gutsy dramas, and like me, he could lose himself down a rabbit hole of movies for hours and hours; much to the disgust of my mother. 
Dad and I could natter about movies for hours, we would recommend movies to each other and we would quote our favourite lines from movies to each other when we were talking about them. My dad understood what it felt like to be genuinely moved by movies and he would watch just about any genre, including art house and foreign cinema which we would often chat about. I really miss having my dad around to talk about TV and movies with and I miss the excitement that I felt when I would find a movie that I knew that he would love. He got DVD's on more than one occasion from me for Father's Day that's for sure. 
​I had a pretty special relationship with my dad and for all of his hard exterior and seemingly toxic masculine throw out comments, my dad could actually be a deeply compassionate, caring and genuinely gentle man. My dad offered me comfort, understanding and a sympathetic ear on more than a few occasions and I always felt, even though he could at times be so distant and aloof, that he had a soft spot for me that no-one else in my life has ever had.
They say that no-one will ever love you like your parents and when it came to my dad I believed that to be true. He loved me, he really did. And even though he struggled to demonstrate it times because of his own issues, he did love me like no-one else ever did or has since. He forgave me for every shortcoming or fault that I had growing up, he hugged me like he was going to break my ribs and he spoke to me in honest and revealing ways that told me that he trusted me and he loved me. I miss having a love like that in my life and even though Craig offers me a pretty huge love, like I said before, no-one will ever love you like a parent and I miss that unconditional love and mutual adoration greatly. 
​I also miss the old school Aussie larrikin side of my dad. Political correctness never quite reached my dad's wheelhouse and it meant that he was never afraid to say some scandalous but also quite funny things. I know that dad always fancied himself as a bit of a maverick and shocking people was something that I think that he enjoyed greatly. He was always the first to call bullshit on everything and sometimes it was really funny but it could also be quite revealing because my dad's tolerance for actual bullshit was incredibly low. Again I know that I also have inherited that quality from my dad as well as my quirky and cheeky sense of humour and I do miss having a laugh with my dad, he could be side splittingly funny when the mood took him. 
And I suppose that's it's completely healthy and normal to miss my dad and to long for a little bit of what is now missing from my world. Holidays like Father's Day are always going to heighten my longing for more time and also make me reminisce about the times that we did get to share together. I guess that I should feel lucky that I have such great memories of my time with my dad to recall when I do feel the heaviness of the world without him and for that I will always be thankful. 
Missing you dad...thinking of you and wishing that you were still around - Happy Father's Day xx

Having amazing streaming capability and a host of good apps and websites to call upon is pretty much essential in our current climate. And that's pretty rich coming from me because as some of you would know I generally like to kick it old school and do not use social media platforms or apps to get my jollies. However I am not completely immune to the power, allure or entertainment factor of the internet, I'm a Gen X for goodness sake - I bloody love tech! And even though I am mostly reclusive on the internet, I do have a number of apps and websites that I just could not manage without. 
Apps I Cannot Live Without:

• Pinterest 
• Goodreads
• Ted Talks
• IMDb 
• Insight Timer
• Triple J Radio
• Airbnb
• Audible 
• Spotify 
• Netflix
• Stan
• Amazonprime 
• SBS on Demand
• ABC iview 
• AppleTV
• Foxtel Go 
• 7 PLus
• 9 Now
• 10 Play 

Every other app is just gravy to me, but the apps listed above I would use very regularly and yeah I know, it's a boring as bat shit list but as I said earlier, I have very simple tastes. 
​
Now, let's look at my can't live without YouTube channels:

• Raphael Reiter - transcendental meditation
• Yoga with Adriene - yoga
• JonTronShow - humour
• Fightmaster Yoga - yoga
• After Skool - inspiration
• Frank James - infj
• YOGATX - yoga
• Daily Dose of... - inspiration
• Ozzy Man Reviews  - humour
• Chris Stuckman - cinema
• Blogilates - workout
• Five Parks Yoga - yoga
• Cinefix - cinema
• The Chopra Well - wellness and meditation
• Psyche Truth - wellness
• Power Thoughts - wellness
• David Lynch Sunday Best - inspiration
• Russell Brand - inspiration
• The Mindful Movement - wellness and meditation

Probably no big surprises there either, but I do waste a bit of my free time on those channels and I do follow them all as well. 

And we all have our fave go to stations, apps and YouTube channels and quite frankly, we all need them right now. Technology is the only thing that is really keeping us connected and relevant at the moment, so I think that it is totally okay to allow yourself to fall into a few web-related rabbit holes or just surrender to a TV embrace for a few hours. With so many restrictions and guidelines and barriers around almost every other aspect of our lives, it feels not only good but also extremely necessary to escape, tune out and enjoy some simple and accessible pleasures. And if that happens to come in the form of an app, video game, TV show, movie, YouTube station or website - then I say go for it and enjoy it fully.
Thank goodness that we have technology to fill the boring void that we are all experiencing whilst we await a COVID19 vaccine. Come on science, we are all just marking time and waiting for you to deliver now!

Experts say that in order to know if you are accomplished on any subject then you should be able to deliver a 40 minute talk about it, on the spot without any planning or preparation time. I'm pretty sure that there would be dozens of people scrambling at the mere concept of this, not only because delivering a coherent and educational speech on the spot without preparation seems like pure madness but also because this idea falls well outside of most people's comfort zone. 
Delivering any kind of speech or public demonstration on the spot is enough to send the most rational and calm individuals into a tail spin, but studies have shown that if someone really knows their topic well enough and is a professional on the subject that they are delivering, that a 40 minute on the spot talk is not only possible but also quite educational for the people that receive it. 
Naturally after hearing this I started to ponder what I might be able to deliver an 'on the spot' 40 minute talk about that I was not only expert enough about to share, but would also be an interesting enough subject that other people might give two shits about. And let me tell you, this is an excellent thing for everyone to ponder because it really determines what you are genuinely talented or qualified enough about to be able to talk about in an interesting way for the better part of an hour.
After much deliberation and contemplation, here are the things (in no particular order) that I believe that I could talk about to others for 40 minutes - on the spot, whether or not anyone would actually want to hear any of my talks, well that's a whole other thing entirely, but here's a list of topics that I believe that I could deliver - for good or for bad: 

• Movies You Need to See If We Are Ever to Talk About Movies Together Ever Again.
• Self Care and Mindfulness for Neglectful Headcases. 
• Healthy Eating and Cooking (aka. How to Stop Being So Fucking Lazy in the Kitchen). 
• Incorporating Some Zen into Your Everyday Routine Because You're Currently a Wreck.
• Time to Grow a Vagina - (aka. Why Horror Movies Are Awesome) 
• This Too Shall Pass - A Lesson in Acceptance and Letting Go of all of That Crap
• Long Term Relationship Success (aka. You Said Yes to That Mess) 
• Unmissable Television Series That You're a Dud if You Don't See
• Kids- Can't Live With 'Em, Can't Live Without 'Em
• Oh, So That's Happening Now? (aka the Truth About Ageing) 
• Planning Family Holidays on a Budget (aka. How to Use Airbnb to Your Advantage) 
• Journal Writing 101 - Get it Out of You and Write That Shit Down!

If anyone would like to hit me up for any of these informative talks, please let me know, I would be more than happy to bore you death with my long winded rants and opinions on any of these topics at any time! 

THE GENTLEMEN 
Release Date: 2019 
Rating: MA 15+
Running Time: 113 mins 
Director Guy Ritchie goes back to his gangster movie roots with his latest offering The Gentlemen. In true cockney screwball fashion, we again find ourselves thrown into the underworld of British crime with tonnes of seedy, colourful characters and another deeply convoluted and looping storyline. 
Mickey Pearson is a well known American marijuana kingpin in England who is looking to sell his cannabis empire for a handsome price. However a variety of rich, influential and shady characters are attempting to undermine him behind his back in an attempt to bring down the cost of his business. 
Although amusing, I don't think that this is as good as Ritchie's early gangster offerings like Snatch or Lock, Stock and Two Smoking Barrels, but it is still a completely fun and entertaining watch. Hugh Grant, Colin Farrell, Charlie Hunnam, Henry Golding and Matthew McConaughey are genuinely great here and definitely elevate the script with their razor sharp delivery of their seriously flawed and exaggerated characters. 
As far as fast paced, cockney crime-comedies go, this is a really enjoyable watch and a must see for Guy Ritchie fans that have been waiting for him to deliver another quality gangster movie. 
FINAL SAY: If you wish to be The King of the jungle, it's not enough to act like a king. You must be The King. 
3.5 Chilli Peppers ​

I recently found out that I am a number four in the Enneagram system of personality types. Number Four types are Individualists, they are creative and unique and are defined by their sense of being special and different from other people - which trust me, is not nearly as cool as it may sound.
There are nine different personality types and you can easily take a 10 minute online test to determine which type you are - just click on this link to take the test now: www.truity.com/test/enneagram-personality-test
The word Enneagram derives from the Greek words Ennea meaning nine and Gramma meaning something that is drawn or written, and each of the nine personality types is defined by a particular core belief about how the world works. No one really knows the exact origin of the Enneagram, but we do know it has an eclectic history. Some assume ancient roots in Babylon around 4,500 years ago while others place the origin in classical Greek philosophy around 2,500 years ago. The model has been attributed to the Jewish Kabbalah, Christian mysticism and Sufism, a mystical form of Islam. Dante apparently had very good knowledge of the Enneagram since the characters in The Divine Comedy correspond largely to the Enneagram types.
What we do know, is that the modern Enneagram system is the work of the contemporary author Georg Ivanovich Gurdjieff, a mystic and spiritual teacher who introduced the model as a spiritual symbol in the 1930s then brought it to the Western shores in the 1960s. Most researchers today tend to focus on the psychological rather than the religious side of the Enneagram, drawing comparisons with other personality models like the Myers-Briggs system.
The core belief systems of an Enneagram personality type shape your worldview and the perspective through which you experience your environment and the people around you. Our core beliefs are not necessarily incorrect, but they can be limiting. By better understanding your Enneagram type and how it colors your perceptions, you can apparently broaden your perspective and learn to approach situations in a more effective way. 
Understanding your Enneagram type helps you to understand why you behave or react in the ways that you do. Each type has a set of core beliefs that motivates them to take particular actions and guides them to make certain decisions. Knowing your Enneagram type can also help you to understand how and why other people react the way that they do in certain situations. By describing how each type adapts and responds to both stressful and supportive situations, the Enneagram shows opportunities for personal development and provides a foundation for the understanding of others.
Today it is mostly used for personal self-knowledge and personal development, offering a powerful tool for self-mastery, conflict resolution, team dynamics, leadership and emotional intelligence. Because it identifies opportunities for development in each individual type, it has become widely used in areas such as counseling, psychotherapy, business development, parenting and education. 
But in all seriousness, you can just decide for yourself whether or not you feel any connection to your personality type after you've taken the test and found out what your type is. And even if you gain nothing from taking the test and think that it is all a big load of malarkey, it's still a bit of fun and a good time filler on a rainy Sunday afternoon. 
Big shout out to all my fellow #4 Individualists out there - keep on being your unique beautiful selves!

PERSEPOLIS
Release Date: 2007
Rating: M
Running Time: 96 mins
An Iranian-French-American animated movie based on Marjane Satrapi's autobiographical graphic novel of the same name. After tying for the Jury Prize at the 2007 Cannes Film Festival, writer and director Marjane Satrapi said in her acceptance speech "Although this film is universal, I wish to dedicate the prize to all Iranians." Satrapi's story reached a wide audience, educating the masses about the Iranian revolution, touching people's hearts and creating waves of controversy as well. 
Persepolis is essentially a coming of age story about an outspoken and unique Iranian girl named Marjane. Marjane grows up amidst the Islamic revolution and is eventually sent away by her family to make a better life for herself in Vienna. 
Produced in moody black and white, and delivered with highly stylized visual flair, this film works on so many levels. Marjane is really no different than any other teenager trying to find their way in the world, she just happens to have seen a lot more brutality and inequality in her time. This is certainly no fairy tale, but it is hopeful, and there is  a great deal of clarity to be gleaned about the realities of the Islamic revolution from this beautifully presented political drama. 
FINAL SAY: Never forget who you are and where you're from. 
3.5 Chilli Peppers ​

When it comes to taking care of ourselves and not getting smashed on the shores of real life events, introverts can often be quite inept at listening to their inner voice and stepping back before reaching burn out or fever pitch. There is nothing worse than dealing with an introvert that has been ignoring their inner voice that has been telling them to slow down and take a break, it can start to feel a lot like you're reasoning with Jake LaMotta from the movie Raging Bull and it isn't fun for anyone involved. 
Where extroverts get energy from other people and feel down if they are left alone for long periods, introverts work at the polar opposite end of that scale and require regular alone time in order to feel grounded and centred. 
For that reason I have compiled a list of the best self care strategies that I use to sate my need for alone time and quench my introverted feelings of overwhelment and frustration. If you too, like me are an introvert then hopefully you will find this list helpful when you find yourself in need of little self care and t.l.c. 
1. STOP!
And I don't just mean sit down for 5 minutes, I mean fully and completely stop. All devices, distractions and external noises turned off. You need to be completely alone and uninterrupted for 10 solid minutes. If you are at work or in a public space you may need to seek out a spot to make this happen (even your car can be an option if all else fails), but wherever you are, you have to find a way to make it possible to be alone and switch off completely. Think of yourself like a iphone that needs recharging, you have to find a power outlet and plug in - you're giving yourself the recharge that you need to get through the day - it's valuable and vital - especially if you are the type of introvert that is prone to burnout. 
2. DO SOMETHING CREATIVE
Nothing soothes a messy mind like putting something down on paper. Colour a mindful colouring book, doodle, paint, sketch, write in a journal or if you are really crafty make something more 3D with your hands. Paper crafts, sculpting, jewellery making, knitting, crocheting, sewing, making bread or even playing an instrument have been scientifically proven to release stress reducing endorphins. You will not only produce something handmade and awesome but will also allow the introvert in you to tune out from external input and reboot your system. 
3. NANNA NAP 
Nothing recharges a weary mind like a good nap. If you are fortunate enough to take a 30-40 minute nanna nap on the weekend or even squeeze a 20 minute afternoon reboot into your weekday routine, then do it! You're definitely going to be glad that you did because a half hour sleep in the afternoon has also been scientifically proven to boost emotional, physical and mental capabilities. Old people swear by it and little people can't function without it, so why not treat yourself to a nanna nap more often? 
4. WALK IT OFF
Get your feel good endorphins kicking with a nice easy walk around a park. I am not talking about a power walk here, I am talking about a casual meander through the local gardens, somewhere that you can literally stop and smell the flowers, take in a little sunshine and breathe in some good fresh air. If walking is not your bag, that's fine too, you could also try yoga, Tai Chi or gentle swimming. Make it more about the journey rather than the steps on the pedometer. 
5. READ
Everyone knows that I am a huge advocate of getting lost between the pages of a good book for a couple of hours when you can and it is not just about being immersed in a great story but also about the stress reducing and long term health benefits around reading. Reading is so damn good for you; it increases your intelligence, memory and general IQ  and next to meditation it is the most effective way to stimulate your mind without the need for movement or chemicals. Introverts get reading now - it's a brilliant way to detox and reboot. 
6. TOUCHY FEELY
No I don't mean going off to have a bit of rumpy-pumpy, but if that's what get you feeling good then so be it, by all means have at that too. What I was actually referring to was using your sense of touch to diffuse your introvert anxieties. The best ways to do this are to engage in mellow and releasing touch stimulations like petting your cat or dog, taking a bubble bath, having a massage, having a long hot shower or putting on your favourite comfy clothes or PJ's and snuggling under a soft blanket. Physical touch release actually works really well for introverts and if you haven't tried this method of self soothing yet, I would definitely urge you to do so. 

​And there you have it, six sure fire ways for any introvert to defuse their anger, reverse their exhaustion and reboot their systems. Make some time for your introverted self and take care of your wellbeing, because nobody likes a tired, grumpy or intolerant introvert; so save us all from the Raging Bull antics and be kind to yourself!

RAGING BULL
Release Date: 1980
Rating: MA 15+
Running Time: 129 mins
Martin Scorsese and Robert De Niro are truly a winning combination and Raging Bull is certainly testament to that fact. Considered one of the best films to have been made in the 1980's, Raging Bull was clearly ahead of it's time. Shot in moody black and white, this is certainly not like any other sports drama that had been made at the time; and the script works hard to disclose the barbaric and brutal realities of boxing as a sport, with a stellar and clearly physically demanding performance from De Niro. 
Jake LaMotta is a middleweight boxer that has fought his way to the top and refuses to go down for anyone. His obsessions and delusions soon reveal him to be an unstable, jealous and volatile man that will stop at nothing to keep his stranglehold on his boxing title and his beautiful wife. 
Joe Pesci plays Joey, LaMotta's brother and well-intentioned manager with lots of heart, and Cathy Moriarty does a fabulous job of portraying Vickie, LaMotta's long enduring wife; but in essence this is De Niro's movie from start to end. He gained an incredible 27kgs to portray Jake LaMotta in his post boxing days, making him almost unrecognizable and there wasn't a moment during the film that I didn't find him terrifyingly unhinged. 
FINAL SAY: So give me a stage where this bull can rage....
3.5 Chilli Peppers ​

I know that I recently wrote a blog post all about Intuition vs Logic and I have since enjoyed some lengthy and interesting discussion with friends around that topic; and this is because there seems to be some misunderstanding around the difference between intuition and instinct, and which of those we should be listening to. In my previous post I said that you should be careful of always choosing to go with your intuition over your logic and I cited some pretty valid reasons for that, but when it comes to listening to your instincts it's a whole other ball game because overriding your instincts can be much, much harder indeed. 
Your intuition is that feeling that you get, almost like an inner voice or sixth sense that makes you think that something may feel like a good or bad opportunity. Your instinct however is not a feeling, it's an innate hardwired natural tendency to behave or react in a certain way and it's far more primordial than your intuition. Your instinct is part of your biological make up which is why it can be very difficult to override. Unlike your intuitive thoughts which are created when your brain perceives a neural pathway, your instincts are a motor response that are initiated by your whole body in response to an external stimuli. 
Our instincts are what have kept us alive as human beings for thousands of years, they are produced by a biological force that makes us react to hunger and thirst, it's what drives us to use our bowels, blink, sleep, have sex, reproduce and above all else - survive. Over time we have managed to hone our instincts so that we can manage them in more refined and appropriate ways, but all of us still have them and not all of us have evolved to a point where we can manage or control them very well.
Suppressing your most basic instincts can not only be useful but also completely necessary if you want to get along in the modern world. It would be completely inappropriate to jump every person's bones that aroused a sexual instinct within you, and although there probably was a time in history when this was a useful instinct to employ in order to sustain human kind, these days it would obviously be extremely frowned upon and you'd probably end up in jail. Also managing other social/emotional instincts like our instinct of fight or flight, which may not always be an appropriate response in every situation has been replaced with more refined methods of negotiation and modern logic now, so there is no need for anyone to run screaming out of a room when they feel affronted or afraid anymore. 
However, those fight or flight instincts can still come in mighty handy when it comes to certain survival situations and there are hundreds of human experiences that we would still be using the method with, and it would be saving our skin to do so.  In general, ignoring all of your instincts is pretty unwise because our instincts are important innate behaviours that we learned and practised for a reason - as humans we all need them, but some of our human instincts that we have developed over time are not only useless now but they could even cause the eventual the downfall of humankind if we can't fight against them.
Our strongest human instinct, the one that overrides everything is our survival instinct. Because of this super strong survival instinct that all humans have, we have also developed a few less than attractive instincts in order to keep the flock safe and humans alive. The worst of those are denial, revenge and greed. Due to the extreme scarcity of resources for early man, greed was a form of survival. Being honesty also didn't feed anyone and neither did forgiveness, so denial and revenge were ways to establish pecking order, strengthen loyalties and ensure that a tribe survived. Unfortunately, many of us are still employing these shithouse instincts into our lives today and the results have been damning to say the least. Many people are still instinctively in denial about many modern issues like food shortages, lack of clean drinking water, global warming, pollution, disease, overpopulation... the list goes on and on and the reason for this denial is often fed by greed and revenge. And even though we do not need to employ these basic instincts to protect the herd anymore, many of us still do and the results are devastating on a global scale. 
So, in short it is fair to say that we should, just like our intuition, listen to our logic and sound modern thinking before we allow ourselves to be overcome by our often outdated biological instincts. We as humans pride ourselves in being the leaders of this planet, and in doing so we have an obligation to behaviour in a more refined and dignified manner than some of our instincts would like us to because if we don't, then we are really no better than the animals that we say we are going to protect. Don't be a slave to your instincts, use them when you need to but be aware that some of them are totally archaic knee jerk reactions that you can learn to control and replace with more evolved and humanitarian choices. 

You don't need to have religious calling, become a devout Buddhist monk or start drinking the Kool Aid with a local cult to feel like you are tapping into a higher power. In fact, your true higher power really doesn't necessarily have to have anything to do with religion or any organised belief systems because tapping into your higher power is really just about finding out about what motivates, stimulates, activates and energises your life; and that is going to look different for everyone. 
So many people attribute the term 'higher power' to a power that is greater than ourselves and I respectfully say to them that I strongly disagree. From my experience, this is most certainly not the case for everyone. Many, many people are able to tap into a higher vibration or version of themselves without having any firm or fixed ideas around an existential God or deity. And I firmly believe that it is just as correct to call this inner attunement 'tapping into a higher power' and that is the kind of higher power that I am going to be discussing today - your internal higher power; but if it makes you feel more comfortable to look outside of yourself for that then by all means, go for it!
In order to become more attuned to your higher self, you do need to be willing to go within. This may take the form of meditation, contemplation or for religious people - prayer, whatever you're doing, you need to quiet the mind, still the body and calm the inner voices so that you get beneath all of the hum and noise that you are so used to hearing all of the time. You're looking for a deep dive into the seat of yourself because what you are attempting to do is connect with the deepest parts of your subconscious and really listen to the most raw parts of yourself. This voice, the one that lies deep within you, is your higher power.
But why bother trying to tap into this 'higher power' anyway? It all just sounds like a lot of sitting around and zoning out right? Well, in all honesty, when you do manage to find that voice that I spoke of earlier, it will help you to understand yourself a whole lot better. It will help you to heal old hurts, open your mind, help yourself and others and teach you to be more loving and accepting of differences and mistakes. Becoming more attuned to yourself will allow you to identify patterns in your behaviours, root out problems in your life and best of all solve them as well. And just to really put the icing on the cake, your higher power will also help you to love yourself unconditionally. 
I know that some people will think that this is all just spiritual mumbo-jumbo, but it really isn't. You do not need to be spiritual or believe in any kind of God to be able to attune to your own rhythms and subconscious energies. If everyone spent more time tending their own gardens and less time worrying about what was going on in anyone else's, trust me - it would be a much brighter and calmer world overall. So don't look elsewhere, I say look within to unlock, unfurl and understand who you really are. Everyone deserves a higher love and a link to their higher self but knowing that you don't have to go outside of yourself to get that is really one of the most empowering things that anyone could know. 
Get started right away, learn to listen to your body, tune into your feelings and pay attention to your thoughts. Attune to your higher power and start to love yourself on a whole new and more deeply empowering level. You truly deserve nothing less than that and I honestly do believe that. 
The COVID -19 pandemic has made it absolutely impossible for anyone to travel anywhere for quite some time, so why not invest some time in a little inner travel? What have you got to lose? And it is completely free!
​I do encourage and sincerely wish you well on your explorations to find your higher power; remember to travel softly, be super kind to yourself and really take your time...and above all else - enjoy the journey!

THE LIGHTHOUSE
Release Date: 2019
Rating: MA 15+
Running Time: 110 mins 
A psychological thriller, directed and produced by Robert Eggers, who co-wrote the screenplay with his brother Max Eggers. Shot in black and white and delivered in a nearly square 1.19:1 ratio, The Lighthouse is a deeply affecting and sinister watch that blurs the lines between horror, art house, mythology and edge of your seat thriller. 
Ephraim Winslow (Robert Pattinson) undertakes a four week contract as a lighthouse keeper on an isolated island off the coast of New England under the guidance of veteran 'wickie' Thomas Wake (Willem Dafoe). As the days stretch into weeks the men succumb to the madness of isolation, the intolerably cruel conditions and the often erratic and irritable behaviours of one another. 
Pattinson and Dafoe are absolutely brilliant here, delivering Oscar worthy, powerhouse performances and going to incredible lengths to create something that is so unforgettably dark and unsettling that I found myself thinking about it for days after.
Steeped in superstition and folklore, the story takes some unexpected turns as it delves into some seriously controversial territory like loneliness, alcoholism, toxic masculinity and hidden identity. The Lighthouse is undoubtedly the most unforgettable movie of the year and will definitely be shocking audiences for many years to come. 
FINAL SAY: Let Neptune strike ye Dead, Winslow!
4 Chilli Peppers ​

Which would you like to have more of in your life, supporters or friends? And do you even need to choose? Can't your friends also be your supporters? Well, in some instances yes they can, but unfortunately in many friendships that is often not the case. So let's take a closer look at what constitutes being a friend compared to being a supporter. 
By definition, a friend  is a person outside of your family circle that you enjoy the company of or feel an affection for; which does not mean that they are necessarily also your supporter. We all have some friends that are great fun to spend time with but when the going gets tough or we need someone to bounce the heavy stuff off of, we aren't necessarily going to call them. That doesn't make them bad friends or 'unworthy of our time or affection' friends, they just aren't in your supporter group. So there clearly is a difference between being a friend and being a supporter, and just because someone is your friend that doesn't automatically mean that they are going to be the best person to head up your personal cheer squad. 
Generally, these are the qualities that I am look for in my friends:

• They enjoy being with me 
• They don't judge me 
• They are generally kind and respectful
• They see me socially on a regular basis
• They are loyal and wouldn't put me down behind my back
• We can enjoy a laugh together

When it comes to supporters, I am looking for people who:

• Are there for me no matter what
• Want me to succeed 
• Will kindly let me know if I'm being out of line
• Comfort me or assist me when I feel overwhelmed or sad
• Share in my joys and losses 
• Have my back 
• Listen - really listen.

I am actually extremely fortunate, because many of my good friends are also my supporters, but I would be lying if I said that they all were. All of my friends are terrific company but some of them are definitely better supporters than others and I am sure that this would be true for most people. And to be honest, I don't expect all of my friends to be my best supporters, it takes time and shared experiences to cultivate strong and committed friendships and sometimes we aren't looking for a supporter anyway. Sometimes I just want someone to hang out with and have a laugh with from time to time and no-one has to be on my personal cheer squad to meet that need. 
When it comes to being a really good friend for others I think that I strive to be a friend and a supporter as much as possible, and at the very least a really good friend. Whether I am sharing my deepest darkest secrets or just having a laugh over dinner, all of my friends are exceptionally valuable to me and I am extremely grateful for each and every one of them. If like me you are also blessed with beautiful friends then make sure that you let them know just how much they mean to you. Cherish your posse and treat your friends like they are made of gold because good friends are something that we all really want, but finding ones that are awesome friends and also excellent supporters is both a rare and a beautiful thing indeed. 

Sometimes in life we believe that we can detect patterns. These patterns can be seen in the way that we ritualistically do things or in the way that we behaviour or react to certain things or even in the behaviours and reactions of others if we are really observant. And sometimes we can even believe that we see patterns in external or unrelated things; and when this happens a lot it can actually be a problem or even a sign of mental unwellness. 
The term apophenia is used to diagnose a condition when people have a tendency to mistakenly perceive patterns or connections between completely unrelated things. Coined by psychiatrist Klaus Conrad in his 1958 publication on the beginning stages of schizophrenia, he defined it as the "unmotivated seeing of connections accompanied by a specific feeling of abnormal meaningfulness." 
People that suffer from apophenia will seek patterns in all kinds of random information. Many gamblers actually suffer from this condition, believing that they can see patterns in lottery numbers, card games and roulette wheels, this type of apophenia is often called "gambler's fallacy."
One more common form of apophenia that we all suffer from is pareidolia and it is when we perceive patterns in visual and auditory stimuli. A common example of this might be to see a shape in the clouds or a face within an inanimate object. Think about all of the people who flocked to see images of Jesus or the Virgin Mary on a piece of toast or a block of wood; these items are terrific examples of pareidolia. And who hasn't seen the man in the moon? We all know what pareidolia feels like and most of us can see the patterns and dismiss them as mere coincidence, but some of us actually cannot. 
As humans we all have a need for order, and in general most of us will choose order and predictability over chance and chaos every time. This tendency does push us to see patterns everywhere, even when they do not exist. So when does seeing or hearing patterns become a problem? Well, at the end of the day, thinking that you have found the face of God in your cereal is not really going to hurt anyone, but making false pattern predictions a lot can be extremely dangerous to your wellbeing and overall safety. Experts recommend that if you are experiencing any of the following pattern recognition errors regularly, you may actually have apophenia. So let's take a look at what those pattern recognition errors are:

• Hearing hidden messages when you play recordings backwards.
• Seeing Godlike images in inanimate objects regularly. 
• Hearing voices or messages in ticking clocks or other repetitive noises. 
• Believing in jinx items or behaviours. 
• All superstitious beliefs and behaviours. 
• Seeing 'signs' in mundane things eg. 11:11 on a clock face. 
• Unwaveringly beliefs in conspiracy theories and unproven ideas. 

Hmmm, turns out that seeing Jesus in your cereal may not be so innocuous after all. So, next time that you find yourself laying on your back thinking that you just saw a dragon fly past in the clouds, spare a thought for the people that suffer from crippling apophenia and can't control their beliefs in patterns. Consider just how difficult a life like that must actually be. What we see as a fun way to pass a moment on a sunny afternoon, is actually an obsession for some poor individuals and having no ability to separate patterns from the randomness of life must be extremely frustrating. This is definitely one of the rare moments when I am truly grateful for the utterly random and unpredictable quality of my own life. 

You are enough. What does that mean exactly? We all want to feel like we are enough, but what does it mean to actually be enough. Well, I can tell you now that it does not mean that you have been assessed, made the grade or finally been considered to be worthy enough to have earned the label of "enough" as many people would think that it does. It also does not mean that you have worked hard enough, pushed hard enough, tried enough or done enough, it actually means none of those things. 
You are enough simply means that you are enough. Right now, as you are right at this moment, you are enough. It means that you are exactly where you are meant to be and for now that is enough, however it does not mean that you are everything, perfect or complete which is something that people seem to get very confused about when they hear that they are enough. 
For some reason, people think that "enough" is some zone of completion or perfection, which is absolutely crazy. For a start there is no such thing as perfection. Perfection is completely subjective and in my opinion generally overrated. Also, since you are a human being, you can never ever be "completed" because you are a work in progress for your entire life and you will never stop growing, learning and evolving, and why on earth would you want to anyway? If being enough really was perfection and completion then it would actually be some kind of personal made hell in the form of stagnation and delusion, so no - being enough has nothing to do with being perfect or competed. 
Being enough is really about just being you. You with all of your messy imperfections, your hang ups and your beautiful broken bits that make you who you are, and also having an awareness that it's perfectly okay to be all of those things. Being enough is knowing that aiming for perfection is a form of self made insanity and thinking that you're perfect is delusional and believing you're 'all done' is seriously mental and definitely limiting. 
You are enough means that you know that you don't have to strive to prove your worth because you know that you have worth. You also don't have to question if you are loveable because you already know that you are. It means that you know without a shadow of  doubt that you can be brave enough to be more open, honest, true, authentic, free, connected, purposeful and intentional in how you present yourself and behave, and it's all good to do so. Being enough means that you can have pride in all aspects of yourself, you don't compare yourself to anyone, you have no need to feel insecure about who you are and you also know that you don't need to judge or compete with anyone because all of those behaviours are pointless and will only slow down your overall progress.
​And do you know why you know all of that?
Because you are enough, that's why.
And don't you forget it! 

Some people have quite abnormal and pretty concerning relationships with food. Some people eat too much of it and other people deprive themselves of it, and obviously neither of those scenarios would be considered as having a healthy relationship with food.
So what does it mean to have a healthy relationship with food? Well, having a healthy relationship with food is really also about having a healthy relationship with yourself and your body and its needs. It's all about being connected to what you are eating, when you are eating and why you are eating. Marry all of this with listening to what your body needs rather than what it desires when it comes to food choices and you'll be enjoying what is known as a healthy relationship with food.
Unfortunately, as a society we place far more emphasis on whether a food is healthy or unhealthy than we do on actually forming healthy relationships with food and our own physiological needs. Physicians, dietary experts and psychologists are saying that our attitudes to dieting and nutrition have made many of us quite fat and unhealthy and they are now urging people to give themselves permission to eat again. However in doing so, we must also learn to listen to what our body is really asking for and also teach ourselves to stop eating when our hunger has been satisfied. 
When we are food deprived, we generally eat more high sugar and high carb snacks, which in short means that we are more likely to become 'snack snufflers' and eat far more empty calories and low value foods than we should. Low value foods offer eaters instant gratification but they do come with a very high cost to our overall health and wellbeing. Many processed foods are now being sited to be cancer forming and many junk foods are now being linked directly to diabetes, heart disease and other serious and chronic illnesses. However, it is just as important to understand that eating the occasional donut or having fish and chips once in a while is not going to cause any real problems to anyone. As long as you are eating these kinds of foods in moderation and recognising them as treats and not everyday eating choices, then you will be perfectly safe to indulge in said 'bad' foods from time to time without being worried or fearful that you will gain weight or become unhealthy. 
However, more importantly, experts are saying that what we really need to do as a society in order to maintain a healthy relationship with food is to stop using it as a tool to numb and distance ourselves from our emotions. In general, when people are dealing with an emotional issue they will follow the path of least resistance, which more often than not leads directly to our pantry or fridge. We go straight to the foods that we call 'bad' or that we have prohibited in our minds because that belief makes them even more powerful as a numbing mechanism. So basically, we should never rule any foods out as completely forbidden because that will just strengthen our association to them as being something that can bring us ultimate reward and release. 
So what do you do when the shit hits the fan and you find yourself going to the fridge for comfort? Well, the first thing to do is to notice what you are doing before you eat anything. You need to make everything that you eat a mindful choice and not a subconscious decision, which means that you need to actively decide to eat everything that you do, with some serious emphasis on the words actively decide. In the most basic terms, you need to think about everything that you ingest before you do and always ask yourself these questions before you put any food into your body:

• Am I really hungry?
• Why am I choosing this food?
• Is this the best choice that I can make for my body right now?
• Is food really what I need right now? 

And if you still really want the food that you have chosen after that, then go for it - eat it! Just remember to always eat it slow and mindfully, and to stop as soon as you feel full. And apparently, according to all of the experts of the world, that is all that you need to do to maintain a healthy relationship with food. No taboo foods, no dieting or depriving, just fully conscious, educated and mindful eating choices and you will never have any reason to feel bad about anything that you eat ever again. 

Everyone would like to find that one special person that they can spend the rest of their days with; well pretty much everyone. I am sure that there probably are completely autonomous people out there who do not crave intimacy or long for a life partner, but when it comes to the average Joe's of the world like myself, well we just want to feel like we can hang out with someone that gets us, loves us for  who we are and ultimately can put up with our shit when we are not at our best. And when you do find someone like that, you are going to want to hang on to them forever. But how do you know for sure that you have actually found 'the one' that you want to spend the rest of your life with?
Well, short answer is that you don't know, not really, not 100%. Okay yes, there are all of those initial fuzzy, glowy, feel good vibes that you get when you first hook up with someone, but you can also get those in short term relationships that turn to shit, so they really aren't the best indication that your relationship has the minerals to be everlasting and lifelong. I think that the only way that you can be somewhat certain in the beginning stages is when you have completely bared your mind, body and soul to a person and they still want in. And this type of baring of the self can take anywhere from 12 months to 20 years to establish (depending on your level of openness) so this is a pretty gradual process, an unfolding if you will. However, generally, anyone that can accept all of your flaws, love you unconditionally and accept you at your sickest, weakest and meanest moments is definitely worth considering as a life partner in my opinion. 
Some couples stay together for years and years and still never really get to know each other very well, in fact this is more common than you might think. However, if both parties can be completely transparent with each other, I believe that this is really good start when it comes to laying a solid lifelong foundation of togetherness. However, just as equally important for longevity is common ground and similar values and ethics, because clearly a smack head and a deeply pious catholic, regardless of their ability to be transparent with each other are not necessarily going to make the best lifelong bedfellows are they? As a couple, you simply must have some ethical consistencies in order to thrive, without this there will never be smooth sailing and it is inevitable that the relationship will come to a conclusion, quite possibly an unpleasant one.  
When all of the initial infatuation and fascination wears away (and it does because humans take things for granted - even really good relationships) if you don't have some common ground, united front and shared values, well honestly, you're gonna be fucked pretty quickly. And when I say common ground I mean something more substantial than both of you being into jasmine green tea. I'm talking ethics and general life philosophy. You don't need to be identical, but on some issues you will need to find common ground to be able to have harmony and longitude in your relationship. 
And differences, well they're going to matter as well and regardless of how charming, attractive and wonderful your partner may be, you're going to need some space from them at times as well. Nothing wrong with sharing loads of quality time together, but the saying too much of a good thing can happen in relationships, so some seperation of time and interests is also important to keep things in balance. I for one would've left my husband years ago if we'd been working, resting and playing together all of the time, love him as dearly as I do,  I don't want to be around him all of the time and our very different interests have ensured that we have both enjoyed some mutually appreciated 'away from each other' time. 
But don't take my word for it, I've only been married for 25 years, what the hell do I know about long term relationships? Jokes, I do actually know a shit load about it and I definitely know that at the heart of it all, there are no guarantees with any of it. You can never be 100% sure that the person you choose to be with now will be the same one that you are going to want to wake next to in 10, 20 or 50 years time. And maybe that uncertainty, that gamble that you take with your own heart, that leap of faith into the unknown, maybe it is just another part of the magic and joy of it all anyway.
I do however know that staying in a meaningful long term relationship takes lots of work and a great deal of compromise and a shit tonnes of your own personal time; and there will be times when it feels like none of the effort is worth the struggle, but trust me when I say that it is. That for every rough day there will be a grand day and for every struggle that you endure together you will become stronger and more aware of each others truths and lives. And as long as one of you is always in there batting for you both to stay together, then odds are that you probably will. Odds are that you'll wake up and look at your perfectly imperfect partner one day and wonder how you could ever manage a day without them, and I suppose that will be the day that you can know for sure that they are  the one that you want; hopefully forever. 

Everyone knows what it feels like to have a gut feeling about something, that knot in the pit of your stomach that tells you that something is off or just doesn't sit well. Some people call it their sixth sense, Stephen King called it 'The Shining' and most of us just prefer to call it what it is, our intuition. And regardless of what name you like to give it, your intuition can be a very powerful and useful tool that can help you to stay of trouble, know when you're on to a winner and steer you onto the right path. And for those very same reasons your intuition is certainly not something that I think you should ignore.
However, there is a fine line between being attuned to your intuition and appearing completely batshit bonkers to the rest of the world. Anyone that invests 100% of their decision making processes to their intuition alone is probably going to making some pretty whacky life choices because although useful, that gut feeling or voice inside your head is not always completely accurate and sometimes you have over-ride your instincts and employ some good old fashioned common sense and logic. 
The human brain is wired to find patterns from our experiences and most of this happens to us on a subconscious level. What many people aren't aware of is that 95% of our brain activity actually occurs at this subconscious level and our body is always at work taking in information, finding patterns and triggering neurochemicals that exist not only in our brains but also in our gut. This is what forms our intuition and creates those gut feelings that something is either good or bad. The problem with this is that we do all of this subconscious thinking at much faster rate than we do our rational conscious thinking, we have to or else we would all have meltdowns trying to decide what to wear or eat for breakfast each day, so this process is really important and keeps us moving along and not getting hung up on the details. However, it moves at a fever pitch and this fast brained intuitive thinking is not always where we are doing our best thinking. 
Our intuitive thoughts are not only created by our current situation but also by our past experiences, which can be why people get a really good or bad feeling about certain things, it's because they have had a similar experience before and they are drawing from that deep well of memories. It can make people seem like they have great instincts, but really they just have a shit tonne of experience around a certain situation and have a deeper well to draw from as a consequence of that experience. However, even years of experience can't stop a person's instincts from getting it wrong sometimes and that's because intuition also relies upon cognitive biases like overconfidence, unresolved emotions or feelings and selected attentions and this can prevent people from seeing a situation clearly for what it is. And for this reason, we need to be careful not to rely only on our intuition but also on our logical thinking as well. 
​By realizing that intuition has its flaws, then you can start to ground your instincts by employing more data and logic to the situation. You can consciously counteract your fast brained thinking (subconscious) with your slow brained thinking (conscious) and employ more reasoning, perspective and balance to your decision making. Remember that just because your gut is sending you a message, which may feel very strong and correct to you, it doesn't automatically make it correct and you need to use your logic to determine whether it is or isn't reasonable. 
It really is a case of balancing both your intuition and your logic when it comes to sound thought processes, good decision making and accurate problem solving. Neither is less important than the other, and together they make for a pretty formidable team. So, whether your constantly enlisting the gut feeling of your 'Shining' or checking all the facts and data before making any choices, I would actually recommend that you pay attention to both of those methods now that you have an awareness that neither is more important than the other. Because when it comes to intuition vs logic, there really is no clear winner, you do need both and you should use both as often as you can.