I am finding that there is a very confusing amount of information available online about wellness, health and diet, most of it coming from people that have absolutely no credentials or concrete evidence to support their claims. I mean I literally cannot open up YouTube without being bombarded by a massive influx of clips that claim to have the 'one true method' for supreme health, wellness, diet and fitness. Thank god I am not on social media, I can only imagine how overwhelming the material is on those platforms. 
Anyway, I have watched some of these 'miracle' videos, mainly out of sheer curiosity and so far this is what I have taken away from what I have been told (and this shit is real, people are really peddling this stuff):

• ​You should never eat carbohydrates - they will make you fat.
• You should work out twice a day for 45minutes everyday if you expect to get fit.
• You need around 12 hours of sleep a night to be properly rested.
• If you have pubic hair you are disgusting!
• Clean eating is the only way to get lean and healthy. 
• If you are serious about weight loss you need to fast.
• Exercise is better for weight loss than diet.
• You should never eat or drink sugar in any form - it's fattening and gross for your insides. 
  
• Drinking apple cider vinegar everyday will shed weight off you overnight while you sleep.
• You need to eat more potatoes - they are good for filling you up without too many calories.
• You should never eat potatoes  -  they have tonnes of calories and will make you fat.
• Doing a body wrap is the quickest way to lose weight.
• People who gain weight back after a diet have poor self control.
• You need to drink 3 litres of water a day to be properly hydrated.
• Tans are healthy, we all need a little vitamin D.
• Soy gives you breast cancer.
• The fewer calories you eat the better and days of fasting are excellent for your body.
• Avoid all fats and oils, they make you fat.
• Just detox and you'll lose all the weight you need to.
• Eat six small meals a day to lose weight. 
• Have a massive breakfast, a medium lunch and a tiny dinner everyday. 
• If you aren't sweating, you aren't working out!
• Fruit is full of sugar and will make you fat, avoid it at all costs. 
• Juicing is the best way to get skinny and stay skinny.
• Egg yolks will make you fat.
• Fill up on superfoods and you'll never have to worry about your weight again.
• Gluten free = wellness.
• Pasta makes you so fat!

I shouldn't need to go on, this is clearly all outrageously silly and dreadful advice. The bottom line of health and wellbeing is far more simple and a lot less contrived than all that bullshit. And here are 8 simple tips that do seem to make sense and work, and that I do stand behind. 
1. Eat a wide variety of foods that are as close to their natural state as possible and avoid refined or genetically modified foods.
2. Don't label foods as good or bad, just eat refined foods and sugars in very small amounts and always stop eating when you are satiated. 
3. Counting calories is pointless, not all calories are equal. Just try to opt for healthy choices 80% of the time.
4. Drink water (6 -8 glasses a day) not juice or soda. 
5. Take moderate to mild exercise daily and make sure that you move your body whenever you can. 
6. Get around 6-8 hours of quality sleep a night.
7. Stay within the recommended 10 alcoholic drinks per week is you must drink. 
8. Work on your mindset by meditating, journaling, practising mindfulness and engaging in positive relationships. 

And that's it - eight tips for staying well and being healthy. But what do I even know right? I am no expert and I have zero credentials apart from around 50 years on the clock. All that I know for sure is that I do not have any major health issues, I sleep well, love well, live well and feel amazing most of the time. I rarely get ill and when I do, I bounce back quickly. I have fabulous relationships with my family and friends, I make the best of everyday and I plan to keep on doing that until I am well into my nineties. That's really all that I have to go on.
Health and wellness looks different for everyone, for one person it could be six pack abs and a ripped body, for another it could be walking to the shop for the paper everyday. I am not going to judge anyone's ideas or ideals around this, to each their own. I also fully understand that what works for one person may not work for another and there really is no one magic formula that will work for everyone. So really the only advice that I can be 100% sure of, around any of what I have read, learned or experienced about health and wellbeing, is that that you have to be willing to question anyone that isn't a professional and you should never put your own health at risk for any fad diet or vague recommendation. Also, I do believe that eating well is a form of respect, and that you do deserve that respect for yourself and also your body.
The absolute bottom line, I believe is, to find what works for you and makes you feel good about you and gives you the best ride for your money and time; and then smash it every day and you'll be on the right track for sure!

SUPER SIZE ME 
Release Date: 2004
Rating: M
Running Time: 100 mins
Here's a way to get yourself sworn off McDonald's for the rest of your life. This controversial documentary records a month of solid junk food eating for Morgan Spurlock as he personally puts his health on the line to demonstrate the pitfalls of eating from fast food outlets.
Clearly this is an extreme way of getting across an anti fast food message, but it is riveting watching nonetheless. There is nothing truly scientific going on here, we all know that if you eat nothing but McDonald's for a month you're going to feel like crap. But Morgan's month is closely monitored by a dietitian, a practitioner, a gastroenterologist and a cardiologist, which makes the rapid demise of his health all the more prevalent and alarming. 
This documentary will leave you feeling sick to your stomach and trust me when I say that you won't be going to the drive-through window for a while after seeing it. 
FINAL SAY: No, I don't want fries with that!
3 Chilli Peppers
Note: Super Size Me 2: Holy Chicken! (2017) sees Morgan Spurlock opening his own fast food chicken restaurant in an attempt to explore whether fast food is actually as healthy as it now claims to be. What he discovers is not only an exploitation of the consumers belief in what they are eating, but also an exploitation of chickens and the farmers that raise them for the fast food industry. I actually enjoyed this instalment more than the first Super Size Me and found it overall a lot more alarming as well. It's a solid 3.5 Chilli Peppers documentary. ​

Authenticity is talked about a lot these days. Everyone wants to be seen as more authentic and valued for their authenticity, but no-one really talks about what it actually means to be authentic. I am going to take a deep dive into what it actually means to be authentic and how to tell if someone is actually being authentic or just being a big phoney baloney! 
First and foremost, authentic people do not try hard to be likable. Now that doesn't mean that they are aloof assholes either, but they aren't that worried about ruffling a few feathers when it comes to standing up for what is right, just or fair. They embrace making right choices and they don't crave attention or have ulterior motives when they do this, they have a 'can do' and 'will do' attitude that attracts others to them and makes them highly reliable. 
Authentic people are also good a reserving judgement on others and themselves. They accept their own flaws and faults, and those of the people around them. They will try hard to see the world through other peoples eyes and are open-minded individuals who can meet people where they are at. They are often excellent listeners and can usually see the positive and negative aspects in people and situations.
An authentic person is generally unapologetic about expressing their thoughts. Followers worry that they may lose face of favour if they speak up about what they really think, a genuine person will express their thoughts and opinions without worrying if they wont be celebrated for it. They are not trying to garner attention or brownie points and they would never be cruel, angry or derogatory in the way that they express themselves, so they have no need to worry about how they will be interpreted.  An authentic person would never express their thoughts to attack, manipulate or offend someone, they have good character and a strong sense of integrity. 
One of the other things that you will see in people of high integrity is the ability to self reflect. You have to look inside to be a genuine and authentic. Authentic people will have fewer self doubts and experience less anxiety because they are regularly looking inside and re-evaluating the landscape of their lives.  The own their choices and decisions and can stand behind their ideas and thoughts. An authentic person will not go off half cocked or shoot from the hip, they think before they act and consider the outcomes before they approach. 
Authentic people are generous in spirit. They give to others in many ways. Through resources, time and information, they willingly share in and of themselves as much as they can and enjoy doing so. They love to entertain and spoil the people they love, and they will always share whatever they have access to with others around them. They are never secretive or mean and will not need to take credit for things that they may have been involved in launching. They like to see other succeed as much as themselves and will always bolster the people around them as much as they can. 
And I know that I have covered the topic of transparency before, but authentic people are transparent, honest and empathetic. You do not need to worry about an authentic person trying to trick you, deceive you or discredit you, this not something that an authentic person would ever embark upon. Authentic people are also not arrogant or self-satisfied and they can handle criticism and confrontation with decorum and calm. They understand that things are not always about them and can step back without having to belittle or berate someone behind their back. They welcome open conversation and honest exchanges. 
It is pretty easy to spot a person who isn't really authentic. Obviously they will lack many of the qualities listed above, but they will also have a deep need to be accepted and/or revered in their lives. This will make them insecure, quick to anger and judge others and generally quite competitive. They will be problem finders, energy drainers, constant complainers and negative Nancy's. You will not feel safe with a person who is not authentic and you will definitely struggle to get to know them on a deeper level because they may often be haughty, aggressive, secretive, sallow or dismissive. 
In short, for authentic people, the integrity, reliability and transparency of their character is always going to be more important than any monetary or social status gain. They are never in it for the glory. They are focused on their goals and willingly help others to reach theirs whenever they can. They listen when others speak instead of constantly offering their judgements and opinions. They can express genuine feelings and thoughts without hurting others, they are who they are and would not have it be any other way. They are just great people to have in your life and I hope that you have some rocking authentic people in your world to help you to shine brighter every day and grow more authentic in yourself every day. 

Why do we defy? What is happening inside of us when we feel the need to defy? Usually it is some kind of authority or something that we may feel oppressed by or overwhelmed by that may trigger a need in us to resist openly and boldly. The need to defy rather than accept is human, we all do it, but the degree that we feel compelled to do it, does differ from person to person. So why do some people feel like they need to defy more often or more strongly when others are just happy to comply? And what is actually going on when we find ourselves falling into defiance? 
The topic of defiance is as complex in its psychology, design and origin as the cosmos. Sometimes defiance happens because it is expressing a need, other times it is expressing a deficit or disgust and sometimes defiance can be as simple as your mood or your internal stress levels on any given day. Whatever the reason, we have all at some stage felt the urge to fight back, push back, refuse to accept or bristle against, and that my friends is defiance.
What I can tell you, is that people don't defy for nothing, so for whatever reason, the person in defiance feels very justified in their defiance, which makes it one of the most difficult states to alter and manage and it is why people will so stubbornly adhere to their defiance's. Just like our values and morals, our defiance levels are part of who we are, but there has been some interesting scientific investigation into the topic of defiance that suggests that some people may have less control over their defiance than others. 
At its most simple definition, defiance is basically control aversion. It is the urge that all humans have to rebel against control over one's decisions or ideals. It can be explained by investigating the connectivity between two regions of the brain (the parietal and frontal lobes) as well as behavioural measures of distrust or a lack of understanding. It has been scientifically proven that people with stronger synchronous activation of the two mentioned brain regions were more likely to demonstrate stronger defiant behaviours. They were also more likely to struggle with trust, real consequence constructions and overall decision making. 
When children go into defiance mode, they go hard; this is because they are generally lacking the language or emotional aptitude (due to their immaturity) to restrain or comprehend their feelings of defiance, so they often demonstrate their defiance physically, violently or in extreme measures. Defiance in children often looks like stubbornness, annoyance, refusal or obstinance. It can look pretty much the same in people that have a strong link between the partial and frontal lobes of their brains. These people are synonymous throughout history with rebellion, insurrection, mutiny, revolt, revolution and uprising. They are people who can get a crowd into a flurry when they get going!
And sometimes, we need people to perform these tasks, we need people to revolt, to speak out, to push back and to question the status quo. If there was never any defiance in the world we would have some very serious problems. Corruption, abuse, war and and manipulation would be rife and people with little conscience would rule the planet while everyone else would happily conform like a bunch of mindless lemmings. Not a very appealing prospect at all.
It is true, we do need defiance, it serves a purpose, we need it to protect and defend ourselves and others. However, it is worth noting that not everyone has their defiance levels in check and some people will defy that the sky is blue just to engage another persons limits. This is when defiance is not pro-active or necessary, it is destructive, foolish and thoughtless. It is not empowering, it is disempowering. It is not strong, it is challenging. It is not pushing back, it is pushing over.
Learning to understand where your own levels of defiance sit and where the line sits between proactive and destructive defiance is a moral obligation that we all owe to ourselves and everyone else that we share this incredible planet with. Sometimes defiance is needed and sometimes compliance is necessary, and knowing when to use each of them will make you a better person. And if like me, you think that you may have a strong connection between your parietal and frontal lobe that make you want to fight the powers that be and be a little more defiant than you probably need to be at times, don't despair. Put your penchant for defiance to good use and always stand up for the underdog, question anyone that is obviously a gas lighter, oppressor or fuckwit and try hard to use your powers of defiance to do good things in the world. You don't have to start a revolution to be making changes and you don't have to insight a rebellion to gain a following, and don't you forget that!

​SAINT MAUD
Release Date: 2021 
Rating: MA 
Running Time: 84 mins 
A British psychological thriller that could have easily sat on the gritty list due to its disturbing behaviours and shocking outcomes. Directed by Rose Glass in her feature directorial debut, Saint Maud has received rich critical acclaim for its direction, atmosphere, performances and score. 
A young and deeply pious hospice nurse becomes obsessed with her client, a terminally ill dancer. Desperate to save her client's soul before she dies, Maud goes to extreme and dangerous lengths. 
Saint Maud is a genuinely unsettling watch that constantly swings between religious fanaticism, social awkwardness and a nauseating sense of discomfort and unease. Morfydd Clark portrays Maud with such striking and disturbing effect that you find yourself swimming upon the waves of ecstasy and horror along side of her and the finale delivers a slap down ending that is pretty unforgettable. 
Not an easy watch but Saint Maud is definitely not one to miss either. 
FINAL SAY: Never waste your pain.
4 Chilli Peppers ​

So it is exactly one month since I blogged about re-committing to my wellness and starting my weight loss journey once again and I did say that I was going to be totally transparent about that journey and update my progress every month; so here I am, baring myself to the world again and being 100% transparent about how the journey is going. 
At this stage, I would say that I have experienced the highs and lows of any new journey. I have had good days and bad days. I have lost two kilos on the scales, which is not a lot but it is consistent progress that equates to half a kilo a week. I have not been strict or restrictive with myself because if I make the journey too hard I know that I will quit, slip or give up. If I get hungry I eat, I am not starving myself or being ridiculous. I am not trying to get thin, I am trying to get back to a healthy BMI because I want longevity and best health for life. 
You may have noticed that after I posted about my re-commitment to wellness, I posted about the Stages of Healing, about the process of change and the stages that we have to go through to make real life changes. I wrote about that because I have been going though those stages since I re-committed. I have had a pretty deep dive into why I feel the need to be a certain size and weight and why I cannot accept myself as I am. I mean, it's not like a few extra kilos has made me sick or incapable, on the contrary, I am healthy as a horse, rarely ever getting ill and I have an abundance of energy and a great mindset. I have also been investigating what has led me to fail time and time again to keep the weight off that I have lost so many times before, am I on a cycle of self sabotage and if so, why? 
And I have come to understand that it is not my fault that staying lean is hard for me, I honestly don't think that I meant to be lean. This is why I am not looking for lean, or skinny or thin, because I also know without a shadow of doubt that being lighter or thinner will not make me better, happier or more complete. In the end all that it will do is drop me into the healthy BMI range, which is literally only around a stone of weight difference, so why all the fuss? Do people like me less for being heavier? Does my husband love me less? Do I have less opportunities? No, no and no to all of these. 
However, I did like feeling lighter and knowing that I was in my healthy weight range. I did like that my clothes felt better on me and things on my body looked tighter when I looked in the mirror.  I did enjoy being able to wear more flattering outfits. However, in saying all of this, I know that it sounds and seems so stupid and shallow. I never care about other people's body shapes and genuinely believe that all bodies are good bodies. I know full well that no-one is just the size on their dress label or the number on their scales, so why does it bother me so much about myself? Why am I so obsessed with my own physical inadequacies at the moment? 
You see what I mean? I am deep in the Stages of Healing with all of this. I know that for longevity, I must stay within a heathy BMI range, that is a fact. On the other hand, I also know that a healthy BMI range doesn't necessarily constitute a 'be all end all' when it comes to the 'wellness' scale. It is literally just a number on a scale and doesn't really tell a person anything more about their wellness than their weight; it doesn't consider mental wellness, relationship happiness or general lust for life does it? And I have those things in buckets, and yet here I am writing about eight kilos of weight like it is going to change me profoundly. Which I know it won't because I got down there less than 3 years ago and it didn't make me better than I am now. 
However, I have worked my arse off on improving myself. I have put in countless hours to get my mental, emotional, relationship, spiritual and intellectual health in good order. I have done the Stages of Healing on myself over and over and over. I have shed my skin, bared my soul and completely re-invented my life from the steaming shit pile that it once was and I have worked so hard to get to where I am now. And I honestly feel like getting back into my healthy weight range will be the last rung on a ladder of self improvement that I have been climbing for almost a decade now. Every other time that I have lost the weight and then it put it back on again was because I lacked some other important aspect of the self, some vital piece of the puzzle that needed to be put into place first. Well not this time, this time I am ready. 
As I said previously, this time I am not looking for quick fixes or diets or fad fixers. I am looking for a lifestyle change that will mean that I don't need to keep trying to get to my healthy BMI, I will get there and I will stay there this time.  Slowly and surely and trusting the process along the way, I will get there. I have officially moved out of denial and shock and I now have recognition, I recognise what needs to be done and I know that I have the fortitude to do it. So yeah, that's where I am on the journey. I am in recognition mode, soon to be acceptance I believe. I'm on the road again, I'm working to improve myself again, I'm putting one foot in front of the other and I will get there. 
I'm smoothing out my triangle of sadness....don't know what that means? Well, check out the movie and see for yourself. 

When we set about changing ourselves or 'fixing' ourselves as many people like to term it these days, we set out to transform ourselves and ultimately (in the best setting) we set out to heal ourselves. You see, we would not need to change or fix ourselves if we had not experienced something that damaged us, deformed us or broke us in the first place. So in order to change or fix the things that we don't like or want in our lives any longer, we have to go through the processes of healing ourself, and that comes in stages. 
As with all significant change or new-ness we resist, even if it is good for us, we still resist because we are ding dongs that like to hold onto predictability and perceived safety. So it is hardly surprising to see that the first stage of healing is denial.
DENIAL: 
Denial is our greatest barrier to healing ourselves. It is generally the longest leg of the healing journey because we resist it so much. Recovery cannot begin until unveiling and acceptance happen first. 
SHOCK:
Once you stop denying your need to heal you may experience some unpleasant feelings like: numbness, anger, pain, rage, guilt, vulnerability or shame. Don't fight these feelings, they are part of the healing journey and need to be dealt with. 
​RECOGNITION:
Recognition and acceptance are the greatest liberators. Now that you are aware, the once stagnant waters can begin to flow again. You will start to clear out the old to make way for the new. Work through your feelings and reactions with an open heart.
ACCEPTANCE:
Healing is a journey that ebbs and flows like the ocean. One moment you're all over it and the next you're no where close to where you want to be. This up and down is very normal and you need to be gentle with yourself here; good days and bad days are part of healing. 
RELEASE:
Recognise that while you may not be where you want to be, you can release the idea that you have to anything but here and now. 
REFLECT:
Make space to witness your progress from a third person perspective. Take a step back and survey the story that you are now experiencing. Breathe deeply and reflect on how far you have already come. 
EMPTINESS:
Take time to mourn the old version of yourself that isn't serving you any longer. See how you are growing and changing and developing better ways to be. This is also a time when we may feel the need to release certain people that are associated with our old selves from our lives. This is because they no longer fit into your new lifestyle choices. This shedding can be difficult and leave us feeling spiritually or emotionally naked. 
INTEGRATION: 
Integrating new strategies that will stick is difficult. It takes time and repetition to replace old habits with new and better ones. This process can be challenging but it is also deeply rewarding and important work. Don't give up, keep going!
TRANSFORMATION:
You are now making constant changes that you feel are most appropriate for your journey. You are in control of your own destiny, you are not the person that you were and you have healed yourself. Congratulate yourself and celebrate your transformation. 

It is really important to remember that healing and change, in any guise, takes time and commitment. It is often slow and challenging and it can be trying and traumatic. If you cannot do it alone, seek professional assistance or personal guidance from a trusted friend or companion. The road to healing is fraught with danger and difficulty, be aware that every set back is part of a process and every attempt to heal yourself is a worthy undertaking. Be kind to yourself, be patient and be willing to fail, succeed and find a better you in the process. 

FLEE 
Release Date: 2021
Rating: M
Running Time: 90 mins
A Danish adult-animation documentary film directed by Jonas Poher Rasmussen that received unanimous acclaim from film festivals and critics alike for its excellent animation, story, thematic content, subject matter and LGBT representation. And there is certainly no denying that Flee is deeply and profoundly affecting from start to end. 
A man under the alias of Amin Nawabi recounts the trauma and terror of his hidden past which included fleeing from his home country of Afghanistan to Denmark. 
Through gripping, candid and distressing storytelling, we come to view a plight that is practically incomprehensible to most westerners. Flee is essentially a survival story about one man trying to make sense of his shattered past and traumatic experiences in order to embrace the man that he is today. 
I saw the English language dubbed version which has Riz Ahmed and Nikolai Coster- Waldau performing as the narrators, and I would definitely recommend this version to English speaking viewers. The film also contains archival film footage of actual  events in Afghanistan around the time that Amin fled, and this really adds to the overall impact of this powerful and unforgettable film. 
It's definitely not a pleasant story but it is certainly one that needs to be heard by everyone. 
FINAL SAY: We have no idea what's going to happen to us. 
4 Chilli Peppers ​

When someone says 'Trust the Process' to you, do you feel triggered? Do you think that 'trusting the process'  is just some cliché, idiotic line that hippy-dippy weirdos put stock into so that they can run about doing three parts of fuck all? Perhaps you feel that 'Trust the Process' has zero affect on you as a statement because you do not at all connect with the idea of letting go to allow things to happen.
Fair enough, I totally get all of that, and that is the reason why I feel like I need to unpack  'the why' around my ideas for you. Why in the name of sweet Jesus, have I adopted the term 'Trust the Process' as my mantra, when I clearly have a brain in my head? And why have I suddenly decided to restore my faith in the universe, believing that it has my best interests at heart and that it will also have my back, when there is absolutely no evidence to support this kind of thinking? It's utter madness right?
'Trust the Process' probably sounds either certifiably ridiculous or stupidly dangerous to you, and I can fully embrace why you would think that, putting all of your trust into an unknown to have your back, is well, it is batshit bonkers. Even a simpleton can grasp that just letting go and letting the chips fall where they may is not a good life mantra or a high outcome mode of lifestyle choice. However, it is not as batshit bonkers as it may at first seem, and if done with thought and mindfulness, it can actually be life affirming and liberating.
​Now, please let me say that there are some very hard guidelines around how to and how to not 'trust the process' in order for you to succeed. A sure fire way to fail with the whole 'trust the process' caper is to sleep in everyday, eat pizza for breakfast, lunch and dinner and put zero effort into anything but your high score on Call of Duty. Within weeks you will have lost your job, gained 10 kilos and probably ruined most of your meaningful relationships. Bottom line is, you cannot behave like a douchebag and expect the universe is going to reward you for that. 
From what I have garnered, the universe works on some pretty basic principles. 
1. What you give, is what you get. 
Be an asshole and asshole shit will happen to you - end of. 
2. What goes up, must come down.
Sometimes crappy things happen. It is the law of the universe that things cannot be rosy all of the time, if your life was always incredible then you would never need to be enduring, brave, patient, tolerant or accepting. And if you never had to be any of those things, well that you would make you an asshole. See #1 for asshole outcomes. 
3. You are creating your own destiny.
You are the driver of your life, you are the captain of the ship. The universe is just the road or the sea that you are traversing. Whether that sea drifts you into calm waters or buffets you about is going to depend a lot on how you are driving or steering your vehicle. We all know that term 'that person is a car crash' and some people just are. They go through life with their hands off the wheel at all times and wonder why they keep on capsizing! In short, the universe is not in charge of the vehicle (aka - you) but it can change the landscape that you get to travel on. 
4. Where attention goes, energy flows. 
The things that you do, say, invest your time in and the way that you behave becomes the bricks and mortar of your life. If you look for problems, you will find them. If you engage in negative talk, you will be in negative conversations often. If you can't let go from time to time, you'll be wound up tighter than a tin key toy and probably end up with a major illness as a consequence of that.  Try to be impeccable with yourself, your word and your behaviour and if you find yourself in a situation where you just cannot, then just leave the space, go home, remove yourself before you get tangled up in drama. Don't start, expand, exacerbate or trigger others or yourself, it is never worth it. 
5. Excellent Self Management is Key
You have to learn to let shit go. Hang on let me re-phrase that - YOU MUST LEARN TO LET SHIT GO! Whether you meditate, exercise, knit or dance the distress away, it doesn't matter, but you have to do it. Find something that you love and do it a lot (as long as it harms none) and focus your energy into finding the good in people, the gold in life and the joy in the mundane. And finally.....
6. TRUST THE PROCESS! There I said it, trust that if that you do good and be nice that the universe will generally reward you with good and nice things. And when it doesn't, don't go bonkers and lose your shit, see it an opportunity for growth, a chance to show a bit of humility and perhaps even do a  little self check in with your own ego, which we all need from time to time. 
Hopefully now you have a bit more perspective on my move to adopt 'Trust the Process' as my 2023 mantra. Perhaps now you can understand how this kind of mantra, although appearing to be flippant or carefree, is anything but, and it can in fact make you calmer, kinder, more patient, more resilient, more grateful, more confident, more accepting and more willing to accept change in our lives. That all sounds very good to me, and I feel like I want more of all of that in my life, so there is nothing more that I need to say on the topic. I'm just going to trust the process!

SAFETY NOT GUARANTEED
Release Date: 2012
Rating: M
Running Time: 86 mins 
An indie film like no other, Safety Not Guaranteed threw me off guard with its quirky and simplistic intrigue. Directed by Colin Trevorrow, this movie was inspired by a gag classified ad that ran in Blackwood Home Magazine in 1997. 
Three young magazine employees head out on a very strange assignment to interview a mysterious man who placed a classified advertisement seeking a companion to time travel with. 
Aubrey Plaza and Mark Duplass really make this movie work with their incredible delivery. Mark Duplass always manages to deliver weird so well and Plaza's disinterested demeanour is what has made her a household name, together they are fabulous here.  Jake Johnsson and Karan Soni also offer terrific support, and without even meaning to, you will find yourself getting swept along with this nutty plot and its crazy characters as the movie progresses. 
Overall, it's quite good fun. 
FINAL SAY: This is not a joke. You'll get paid after we get back. Must bring your own weapons. 
3 Chilli Peppers ​

The return to work was short, with only one day of active work expected for week one of the first term. Don't get me wrong, I am certainly not complaining. The opportunity to dip my foot into the pool rather than dive right back in was very much appreciated and without any students around, this also allowed for a gentle and staff friendly re-introduction to the fray. Next week, when the students arrive back on the scene, well that is when the real challenges kick off, as we once again begin to navigate another year of unknown situations and unforeseen behaviours.
The commencement of a new school is always a time of great trepidation, you just never can predict what you will be walking back into and it is the fear of that unknown that makes it all the more unsettling. Not to mention the need to re-establish routines and early rises after almost five weeks of leisure time; this is never a simple transition. However, with the aid of meditation and daily yoga practises, I feel that I am better equipped than ever to manage these slights with a dignified calm and a mindful level of self care. In other words, I don't get pulled into the dramas that much these days, which allows me to be a lot more level headed in general. 
I have now been doing yoga for seven years and meditating everyday for five years and I cannot begin to describe what this has done for my overall levels of happiness, contentment and gratitude for the amazing life that I have created for myself. Through journaling (which I have been doing for the better part of 20 years now) I have been able to clearly track my behaviour patterns, my thoughts and my ability to deal with stress and anxiety. And I can honestly say that there has been a profound and significant shift in my mental wellbeing over the last five years. 
I have better relationships, stronger and more meaningful friendships, increased job satisfaction and an increase in my energy and motivation levels. In the last two years I have walked at least 10,000 steps a day, eaten healthier and taken better care of my physical body  and mental wellbeing than I have ever done before. I feel confident enough to call out the bad and celebrate the good, and I have adopted a mindset that allows me to find the positive in most people and many situations that I would've previously allowed myself to be annoyed by. I practise kindness and compassion with others and myself and I even feel comfortable being vulnerable and emotional from time to time - but I'm still working on that one!
I like myself, I love my life and I trust that the universe has my back, and I think that is a pretty good head-space to be in as I return for another year of school challenges and celebrations. So, let's see where the work road leads me this year; it is with perfect love and perfect trust that I allow my arms to open wide to take it all in and trust the process. In fact, I think that I am going to make that my mantra for 2023 - trust the process, I like that. You have to be in a really safe headspace to let go and trust like that, and I think that I am ready. Step back everyone, I'm about to dive in!

RRR (RISE, ROAR, REVOLT)
Release Date: 2022
Rating: MA 15+
Running Time: 187 mins 
An Indian Telugu-language epic action-drama directed by S. S. Rajamouli. This is a movie that defies all explanation and exceeds with it's extreme excessiveness, there is honestly nothing else like it! This is a film that has it all; action, adventure, drama, intrigue, betrayal, comedy, a love story, a bromance and just when you think you've seen it all, they throw in a musical number as well!
The story centres around two real-life Indian revolutionaries, Alluri Sitarama Raju and Komaram Bheen, exploring their fictional friendship and their fight against the British Raj. Set in the 1920's the plot investigates the undocumented period in their lives when both of the revolutionaries chose to go into obscurity before they began to fight for their country. 
This movie is high level entertainment from start to end, it's totally over the top in every way and it works. It is quite long but it is a saga and it is completely captivating at every turn. The street scenes are intensely bustling, the sets are elaborate and extravagant, the CGI is insanely good and the music is bold and magnificent. At the 2023 Golden Globes RRR won the Best Original Score for "Naatu Naatu" making it the first Indian and Asian song to ever receive the award. 
This is the kind of film that you just strap in and have a terrific time watching. 
FINAL SAY: Your friendship is more valuable than this life.
3.5 Chilli Peppers ​

After passing along covid to the entire family for Christmas we all found ourselves back together for new years eve. I mean, no risk of anyone getting sick if everyone's already riddled with the contagion right? There was little point to us all isolating from each other when we were all carrying the same strain and generally feeling fine; so, all of us 'sickies' congregated on the deck out here in Enfield to share a few nibbles and drinks, listen to some tunes and make some resolutions.
And looking back across the landscape of 2022, it really wasn't a bad year by any stretch of the imagination. Sure, things got a bit pear shaped towards the end, but generally speaking things were pretty cruisy and I got to do so many things once everything opened up again and the world got rolling again.
Here are some of my personal highlights from 2022: 
JANUARY: 30 Days of Yoga with Adriene, Smoker arrives in Enfield, Seth's 17th birthday, Bridal dress shopping with Zoe, Seeing Harry Potter - The Cursed Child in Melbourne, tuning in to the Triple j Hottest 100, Paint Your Mate event. 
FEBRUARY:  Chinese New Year celebrations, Smythesdale Fiesta, Ghost Hunting at Blackwood Pub, Spa day with Craig, Summersalt Music Festival, Blackberry picking. 
MARCH: Deep Blue Spa Day, My friends and family being a huge support to me when I had covid on my birthday!
APRIL: Easter Sunday with the family, April holiday break, ELVIS exhibition in Bendigo, Metal detecting with Ben and Zoe, Craig's Mustang arrived.
MAY: A trip to the Gisborne markets, Mother's Day, Spicywatch's 8th Birthday, Tour of the Old Ballarat Gaol, Seth's formal, Barwon Manor Ghost Hunt, Seth's Deb Ball. 
JUNE: Illuminate at the Bendigo Stupa, Mushrooming, Salem is born, Port Campbell Road Trip, Psychic expo, Winter School Holidays, Creswick Ghost Hunt, Zoe's 25th Birthday.
JULY: Winter Movie Marathon nights,  Road trip to Barwon Heads, Twin Peaks show at Hepburn Springs, POCO Short Film Festival, a trip to the Clunes markets. 
AUGUST:  Salem joined our family, The LUME gallery - Van Gogh exhibition, completed the Heritage walk, Book week dress up. 
SEPTEMBER: Father's Day, Spring School Holiday Break, Kyneton Ghost Hunting, High Tea at Fortuna, Girls Road Trip. 
OCTOBER:  Mother of the Bride dress shopping, Seth's last day at Damascus, Yoga Festival in Bendigo, Pumpkin carving, Halloween horror movie/ dinner night.
NOVEMBER: Hen's weekend in Melbourne with Zoe, High Tea at The Grand Hyatt, Zoe and Ben's wedding in Hepburn, Grade 4 Camp at Narmbool, Seth's Year 12 graduation, Spa day with Craig, 28th Wedding Anniversary.
DECEMBER: Carols event, Renault Koleos arrived, Summer Holidays kicking off, Christmas, fishing at Jubilee Lake. 

Pretty fair to say that even in spite of having had covid twice this year (once on my birthday and once at Christmas), getting my poor car's face pranged in and having to navigate the financial pitfalls of 2022, I have still had a really lovely year. 
There is a lot here to celebrate and appreciate that's for sure. And on top of all of that, I have also managed to squeeze in:

• Daily meditation.
• 62 books.
• Workouts - 5 times a week.
• 185 movies.
• 10,500 steps a day.
• 158 TV series.
• 42 brunches/ lunches and  delicious restaurant meals with family and friends. 
• A daily French lesson on Duolingo.
• Brain Gym everyday for 10 minutes a day.
• And....I reviewed another 45 movies on Spicywatch.

Woohoo! That's a lot of 'doing' for one year! 
And now, as 2023 gently unfurls itself before me I wonder what will arrive in the next 12 months. Only time will tell, but let's hope it's as exciting as the last year was for me. 

C'MON C'MON 
Release Date: 2021
Rating: M
Running Time: 109 mins 
A touching and truly effecting drama that was written and directed by Mike Mills. It's been a while since I have watched something this genuinely raw and real. With an undeniable sweet chemistry between Joaquin Phoenix and Woody Norman and filmed in moody black and white, this tale about an uncle and his nephew transcends in the simplest and purest of ways. 
Johnny and Viv have become estranged siblings since the painful death of their mother from dementia. When Johnny reaches out to Viv for the first time in a year he is saddened to hear about the struggles that she has been having managing her estranged husband's mental wellbeing. Viv reveals that she needs to be with her husband as they try to find him the correct care but doesn't have a carer for her nine year old son Jesse. Johnny volunteers to care for his nephew whilst Viv deals with her husband, and he and Jesse embark on a life changing road trip together. 
This is a stunningly beautiful movie about family loyalties, caring for others and uncovering unknown and foreign aspects of ourselves. The struggles and the triumphs feel incredibly plausible and as a parent, very relatable. The fragility and the strength of the ties that bind us to those we love are explored in sensitive and heartfelt ways and the cast is exceptionally good all round. 
C'mon C'mon is unmissable viewing, and it's definitely one of the best dramas to come out of 2021, so make the time to see it whenever you can. 
FINAL SAY: In your confusion and delight, you will forget where you came from.
4.5 Chilli Peppers ​

I have been dreadfully neglectful of my blog these past few months, however when you hear about how busy things have been around here you may be more forgiving. Since mid-October I have squeezed more action and adventure into my life than an Indiana Jones movie, I kid you not, I have had more ins and outs and ups and downs than a roller coaster in the last 6 weeks and although I long for a good TV embrace, I have barely had time to shower properly! 
Check out this list of my goings on and you'll start to get the idea of just how much I can ram into 6 weeks, whilst still work 5 days a week. It's actually pretty head spinning how much I have been able to achieve really. 

• Visited an art showcase
• Hosted a dinner party
• Went shopping for a 'mother of the bride' dress in Melbourne
• Went to friends for dinner
• Went my son's final day of school ceremony
• Went to see the specialist - twice
• Went to a yoga festival in Bendigo
• Wrote my emcee and mother of the bride speeches for the upcoming wedding
• Celebrated Halloween
• Went to the NGV
• Went out for Yum Cha in Melbourne
• Had a spa day with my daughter
• Went to Modiva's for dinner
• Went to a Bridal Shower high tea at The Grand Hyatt in Melbourne
• Went to a Grade 4 overnight camp
• Celebrated my in-laws birthdays with a family dinner
• Got my cat desexed
• Went to my son's year 12 graduation event and dinner 
• Had dinner with my mother in Ararat 
• Went out for a wellness massage and hydrotherapy spa with my husband
• Had my 28th wedding anniversary and went out for dinner
• And never missed a day of meditation, brain gym or French in the process!

And now I am rounding the corner to one of the biggest events that we have ever celebrated as a family - the marriage of our daughter! Zoe and Benjamin will be tying the knot and becoming a 'Mr and Mrs' in six short days time. They are having their special day in Hepburn Springs and I am going to be the emcee, so needless to say I have had to spend a fair amount of time writing and practising speeches and toasts as well. And I think that I am almost ready to go.  
Hopefully, I will deliver it all with just the right amount of magic, humour and joy to make their event run smoothly and seamlessly. May need to sprinkle a little extra magic on my speech though, because I really want Zoe and Ben's day to be extra special!

THE LOVE WITCH 
Release Date: 2016 
Rating: MA 15+
Running Time: 120 mins 
An art house comedy/horror that was written, edited, directed, produced and scored by Anna Biller, an independent feminist American filmmaker who consciously explores feminist themes throughout her work. The Love Witch offers a playful and colourful homage to the 1960's and Technicolour Hammer Horror films whilst  probing into contemporary gender roles and stereotypes. 
A beautiful young witch named Elaine is looking for a new start in life after the death of her husband. Elaine attempts to use spells and magic in an attempt to find a new suitor, and although she succeeds at getting men to fall in love with her, the long term results are disastrous. 
From the dramatic eye make up to the lurid bright-red fake blood effects, The Love Witch is a throwback masterpiece. Amusing and at times visually stunning, this film isn't subtle in any way and although it is slow, it still delivers in so many unique ways. Samantha Robinson is terrific as Elaine, bringing loads of feminine energy and rocking all that swinging '60s fashion with big charm and allure. Jeffrey Vincent Parise also does great job of Wayne, the first man to fall under Elaine's spell and that psychedelic sex scene is utterly unforgettable!
FINAL SAY: Men are like children. They're very easy to please as long as we give them what  they want. 
3.5 Chilli Peppers ​

Anyone that knows me well, knows that I love Halloween. I called my first cat Samhain (which was the name of the Gaelic festival marking the end of the harvest season aka Halloween) and my new cat is called Salem, home of the infamous witch trials. I like to go ghost hunting in my spare time, I adore horror movies and novels and love sweet treats. So yeah, of course I love Halloween. I love everything about it and who wouldn't? You can dress up in scary garb, eat tonnes of candy, pull out the tarot cards and Ouija board and watch creepy arse movies, to be honest it is kind of hard to find any negatives here. 
I wish that we had some scary haunted houses to walk through like they do in other countries though, and that more kids engaged in the trick or treat aspect of the holiday. This year, because of the dreadful weather, we hardly had any  little trickers come to the door in Enfield, which was so disappointing. I now have a massive bowl of uneaten candy to contend with, and considering that I still need to squeeze into my 'mother of the bride' wedding gown in less than a month, this kind of temptation is not welcome right now. 
We do have two banging Jack O' Lanterns at the front door though. Craig and Seth did a stellar job of carving up a couple of pumpkin heads for us. I bloody love a good Jack O' Lantern and I always feel much safer at Halloween with a couple of them burning at the entrance of our home. For those of you that don't know your Jack O' Lantern history, please allow me enlighten you. 
The carving of vegetable effigies and gourd heads has been common practise around the world for centuries. It is believe that the carving of  what we now call a 'Jack O' Lantern' at Halloween first began in Ireland in the 17th century when turnips and mangle wurzels were hollowed out to act as lanterns. They often had grotesque faces carved into them to deter uninvited guests. They were set out during Samhain when it was believed to be the time of the year that supernatural beings and the souls of the dead walked the earth freely for one night only every year.
On the 31st of October, the veil between the world of the living and the world of the dead is said to be at its thinnest, and by placing a burning root vegetable out of the front of your home and ensuring that it stayed alight all night, you were safeguarded from allowing any ill natured or unwelcomed spirit entrance into your home. 
Every year on October 31st, we have at least one Jack O' Lantern on our porch that burns throughout the entire night. And whether it is superstition or just good luck, we have not had any unwelcomed guests to our house on Halloween night either, so it is a tradition that has continued for us. Not only that, but they look so awesome and they are so much fun to design and carve.  The kids in our neighbourhood know that if they see the burning Jack O' Lantern on the doorstep then we are open for some serious candy distribution. 
Perhaps one day I will make it overseas for one of those big, glitzy and all out Halloween celebrations, but in the mean time I am happy to keep my Halloweens on the low down. Just me, my tribe, my good friends, my black cat, my Jack O' Lanterns, my horror movies and my unfortunately still too big bowl of candy!
​And for my keen horror viewers, here's my pick for this year's Halloween movie feature:

BODIES, BODIES, BODIES
Release Date: 2022
Rating: MA 15+
Running Time: 94 mins 
A suspense thriller with a slasher/ gore undertone, Bodies, Bodies, Bodies delivers dark humour and a rising body count in equal measure. Directed by Halina Rejin and written by Sarah DeLappe, this mystery driven tale about a bunch of entitled twenty-somethings will keep you guessing until the very last moments with an extremely satisfying reveal. 
Wealthy Sophie is hosting a "hurricane party" at a mansion owned by her family. As the weather closes in, the group imbibe a number of illicit substances and then decide to play "Bodies, Bodies, Bodies" which is a murder in the dark type game. It's all fun and games until someone has their throat slashed mid-game. Immediately, the group begin to turn on each other and suspicions start to spin out of control as the body count continues to rise as the night progresses. 
This is a well-crafted, modern, whodunnit that explores friendship loyalties, youthful archetypes and the effect that social media has posed around logical thinking and problem solving for our twenty-something cohort. The cast is pretty terrific, with Rachel Sennott, Pete Davidson, Maria Bakalova and Lee Pace bringing loads of youthful energy and believability to their roles.
Every bit as entertaining as the original Scream movie, Bodies, Bodies, Bodies is destined to generate a cult following in years to come. 
FINAL SAY: Did you just fucking shoot me? 
3.5 Chilli Peppers ​

Your body is sending you signals all of the time. Most of the time we are so wrapped up in whatever we are doing that we fail to hear or recognise these signals. When this happens, we get lethargic, we feel weary and sometimes we even get ill. In extreme cases we can even suffer disease, serious sickness or worse still; incurably poor health.
Recently a lot of research and energy has gone into understanding our bodies as a type of eco-system. An individually and uniquely designed system that needs to be in balance to thrive and blossom. Our bodies need balance, rest, nutrients and attention in order to work at peak performance, so ignoring even the most subtle of messages can spell disaster down the track if it goes unnoticed. 
So what should we keep an eye out for? To be honest any signal of imbalance should be treated as serious and dealt with right away in order to quell further problems, but it is a good idea to know what some of those subtle differences may be and potentially what they could be indicating. 
Let's start at the top of the body and work our way down from there. The head is a vitally important part of our body, it houses our brain, eyes, ears, nose and mouth, not to mention it is often fully exposed to the elements much of the time and can therefore also be prone to skin eruptions and abrasions. In short, head signals can be very unforgiving and frequent. 
Headaches can be a sign of feeling overwhelmed or having difficulty dealing with new demands, this in turn can lead to sleeping difficulties, a lack of alertness or agency and can cause people to lose control of situations around them. Any headache or brain discomfort should be investigated immediately by a trained physician, as should any interruptions to the senses of the face such as sight, hearing, smelling or tasting. Many stress, anxiety and anger signals are triggered around the face and head and can indicate a need for attention, therapy or adjustment. If you have frequent headaches it can indicate a serious underlying condition and you should seek medical advise asap. 
Down to the chest we go and we are on the look out for any shortness of breath or laboured and uneasy breathing. Chest pressure can be your bodies way of signalling potential threats or fear of the unknown and it can be alleviated through calming and meditative practises. Of course, any serious chest or breathing problems should always be checked by a professional, but recognising when your body is reacting to certain situations will allow you to better understand when the need for professional intervention is required and when it is not. Hundreds of people rock up to the emergency department every year with chest pains and breathing difficulty claiming to be having a heart attack when they were really just have a panic or anxiety attack. This is why it is important to get to know your body so that you can decipher what it is trying to tell you. 
Heading down further we encounter the gut. The gut is a labyrinth of nerve endings and a biome of its own that resides within your lower abdomen. Recent studies believe that the gut is every bit, perhaps even more, complex than the human brain. It appears that we store much of our stress, anxiety and worry in our gut and any digestive problems or changes in appetite can be a call to attention around unresolved issues and emotional baggage. Gut feelings really are gut feelings, and recent research into the gut is revealing a multitude of fascinating and important body hacks about the gut, so keep your ear to the ground on this topic because I think we are going to be seeing a lot more focus in this area of health in the coming years. 
Now lets not forget to address out limbs, back and feet. Sore feet, muscle fatigue, tension, pinched and aching limb ailments have all been linked to supressed emotions. Turns out that your gut isn't the only thing storing all those bad vibes, your muscles, skin and bones do it too and it can manifest in a number of aching and annoying ways throughout your system. Skin break outs, rashes, aches, pains, stiffness, throbbing and numbness have all been linked to stress and anxiety conditions and have shown vast improvement when treated with gentle, holistic and calming treatment methods. 
Any restlessness, inability to settle or ground yourself is another way that your body sends you signals that you aren't operating at 100%. Even a simple niggle or nuisance pain can turn into something significant if it is left unattended for long enough, so long story short, never ignore the signals that your body sends to you. Listen to that twinge, notice that knot and be attentive to anything that seems odd, out of the norm or annoying within your system. And never forget one of my favourite pieces of advise; that if you listen to your body when it whispers, then you'll never have to hear it scream. So please, tune in and stay strong. 

NOPE
Release Date: 2022
Rating: MA 15+
Running Time: 130 mins 
Jordan Peele delivers a unique mix of sci-fi suspense and horror that is destined to become a cult classic with Nope. With elements of early '80s Spielberg and a big nod to classic sci-fi monster horror, Nope manages to be sharp, funny and creepy in ways that the sci-fi/ horror genre hasn't been in a very long time. 
Em and OJ Haywood have inherited their father's ranch after he is killed in a freak accident on the property. The two attempt to keep the family legacy afloat by selling horses to a nearby Western Theme Park, however, at night, strange and inexplicable things are occurring and their horses are being effected. 
This sounds like a simple story, but it really isn't. There is also a second story running along side that invokes a chimpanzee and a '90s sitcom TV program, but I really don't want to spoil anything for you. In fact the less you know the better here. I went in blind and thoroughly enjoyed the ride. 
The cast is really strong here with Keke Palmer, Daniel Kaluuya, Brandon Perea and Steven Yeun all giving terrific performances. Michael Wincott is also fabulous as the creative film-maker and Keith David rounds things out perfectly as the Haywood patriarch and ranch owner Otis Haywood. 
Teamed with excellent special effects and unnerving sound effects, Nope will stick with you and have you pondering the clouds more than you did before you saw this film. 
FINAL SAY: Yeah, nah nah nah. 
3.5 Chilli Peppers ​

The spring break came and went so fast that I barely had time to register just how good it was until I found myself back at work this week. The sun was mostly present for the two week duration and I managed to fill it with an amazingly enjoyable array of fun activities.
In the space of 16 days I squeezed in all of the following things:
A ghost hunting adventure in Kyneton
Dinner at an Asian fusion restaurant 
A brow sculpting and trip to the hairdresser
High tea at Fortuna in Bendigo with my family
Lunch at Enfield with a dear friend
A replant of my vegetable garden
A trip to the Ballarat public library 
A leisurely walk and lunch with another friend
A full re-worked of the front garden beds and I even planted some new spring blooms 
A road trip through central Victoria with friends
Another terrific Asian fusion dinner and I also had some time to spare to....
Clean out my wardrobe, my pantry, my make up and even reorganised my game cupboard. 
Read four books, watch ten movies and finish three TV series that I had on the go. 
Review ten new movies on Spicywatch; journal, work out and meditate everyday and I even tried out some new home cooked recipes on the family - which they loved! It was a terrific break and also a deeply rewarding one for mind, body and spirit. I returned to work feeling like I had enjoyed a good mix of leisure time, family and friend time, practical time and my fave, me time!
However, the very best of the year lies just ahead of us now as Craig and I prepare for the most wonderful events that will be happening over the next couple of months. Between now and the end of January 2023 we will be celebrating:

• Halloween
• Seth's Year 12 Graduation
• Our 28th Wedding Anniversary
• Zoe and Ben's Wedding
• Christmas
• New Years 
• Seth's 18th Birthday and hopefully, all going well...
• Seth getting his drivers license. 

All that in just under 16 weeks, should be a breeze right? Lucky I know how to hustle when I need to that's all that I am going say!

HUSTLE
Release Date: 2022
Rating: M
Running Time: 117 mins 
A sports drama directed by Jeremiah Zagar that was released by Netflix streaming service and received wide critical acclaim, mainly due to Adam Sandler's tremendously good performance. Now I'm not going to lie, I don't generally like sports dramas and I really don't know the first thing about basketball, but there is a real charm to this simple tale that makes it feel genuine and heartfelt without feeling forced or try hard. 
Stanley Sugarman is scouting for the next big basketball star for the Philadelphia 76ers when he stumbles across Bo Cruz in Spain. Bo is hustling for extra money in street basketball games and he is good, very good in fact. Stanley tries hard to get Bo into a Showcase game so that he can be signed, but Bo's streetwise manner, poor knowledge of professional basketball and lack of self control prove to be unforeseen and challenging obstacles to overcome. 
Adam Sandler is undoubtedly the heart and soul of this film, proving that he has come along way since his Billy Madison days of acting. He is well supported here by Queen Latifah who portrays his wife, Juancho Hernangomez (an actual Spanish basketballer) who plays Bo Cruz and dozens of real life basketball players who play themselves in this movie. 
Essentially, Hustle is a feel good sports film that will leave you with that fuzzy feel good vibe when it ends, it's sweet and it's simple and sometimes we all need a little bit of that. 
FINAL SAY: Do you love this game?
​3 Chilli Peppers ​

According to Hermeticism, a branch of spiritual philosophy that dates back to the first century AD, there are seven Hermetic Principles that can help us to understand the laws that govern the universe. They were first outlined and famed by Hermes Trismegistus (Hermes the Thrice-Greatest), who was believed to have written the Emerald Tablet and the Corpus Hermeticum (two highly influential, ancient teachings).
Hermes Trismegistus' work would go on to influence Greek and Egyptian cultures, with both cultures adopting him as a god of wisdom, and a figure of Hermes Trismegistus can also be found in both Islamic and Baha'i writings as well. In short, he was known around the world as a philosopher of great knowledge and wisdom. 
Over time, the seven Hermetic Principles were passed along by word of mouth from teachers to students and eventually, one day in the early 20th century, the teachings were compiled into a book called The Kybalion, written by "The Three Initiates." Today, they remain an occult source of wisdom, separate from any religion but deeply ponderous and powerful nonetheless. And while the seven principles are just one way of understanding the universe, they aren't so constricting that they cannot be studied alongside other spiritual philosophies as well. So, let's take a look at what they are all about.
1. THE PRINCIPLE OF MENTALISM:
The All is Mind; The Universe is Mental.
This principle states that the universe is akin to a mental projection, it's like manifestation 101. What you perceive or think becomes your reality. For anything to be it must be preceded by a thought. God is consciousness or thought and the universe is a manifestation of the mind of God. We can harness the power of our minds to create the life we want to live. 
2. THE PRINCIPLE OF CORRESPONDANCE
As Above, so Below; as Below, so Above. 
What you send into the world returns to you. If you vibrate high you get high results, if you vibrate low you get poor result. It's kind of like karma or consequence but on a more consciously aware plane. 
3. THE PRINCIPLE OF VIBRATION
Nothing Rests; everything moves; everything vibrates. 
All things in the universe vibrate with physical and spiritual energy. These are in constant change and continual movement. We cannot afford to be attached to anything because nothing is ever in compete status, and by accepting change and movement we can vibrate along side the rhythm of life and swim with the current rather than against it. 
4. THE PRINCIPLE OF POLARITY 
Everything is Dual; everything has poles; everything has its pair of opposites; like and unlike are the same; opposites are identical in nature but different in degree; extremes meet; all truths are but half-truths; all paradoxes may be reconciled. 
A simple example of this hot and cold. Cold is just an absence of heat, and they're both one thing: temperature. Physical matter and spiritual energy are one and the same thing, with spiritual energy vibrating at a higher vibration. Love and hate are two ways of experiencing the same thing, it is our feelings and reactions that will determine how we perceive the world around us.
5. THE PRINCIPLE OF RHYTHM
Everything Flows, out and in; everything has tides; all things rise and fall; the pendulum swing manifests in everything; the measure of the swing to the right is the measure of the swing to the left; rhythm compensates.
Recognise the rhythm of life that is thrumming around you all of time. Your breath, your heartbeat, your pulse. The seasons, the cycles of the moon, the tides in the ocean. The plants and the animals respond without hesitation to these rhythms because they are in flow with the universe; find your flow and get in step with the rhythm of life. 
6. THE PRINCIPLE OF CAUSE OF EFFECT
Every Cause Has Its Effect; Every Effect Has Its Cause; everything happens according to law, chance is but a name for a law not recognised, there are many planes of causation, but nothing escapes the law. 
​Everything is connected through cause and effect, for each cause of one thing is merely the effect of another, and so it has been for all of time. Ask yourself, are you the cause or the effect?
Your thoughts and behaviour effect everything around you, consider what you are bringing to the table and what kind of influence you are having upon the world. 
7. THE PRINCIPLE OF GENDER 
Gender is in Everything; everything has masculine and feminine principles; gender manifests on all planes. 
Masculine and feminine energy exists in not only the physical plane but also the mental and spiritual planes as well.  The unity of both energies is essential for creation and harmony, and when we have a balance of both, we're better able to apply all the other principles together for maximum benefit. Accept yourself and understand that balance is the key for self mastery. 

These seven principles run deep, very deep and it can take a long time to fully understand and embody these as life practises. Each time that you return to the seven principles you will understand them in a different way, and that is how they are supposed to be interpreted, slowly and repetitively. And over time, they can help you to master your mind and your life as a whole, sweet and rewarding experience. 

LEMONADE
Release Date: 2016
Rating: M
Running Time: 65 mins 
More of a visual album than an actual movie, Beyoncé's Lemonade has been dubbed a revolutionary vision of Black feminism; and it left me in deep admiration for this powerful performer. 
Divided into eleven chapter, titles "Intuition", "Denial", "Anger", "Apathy", "Emptiness", "Accountability", "Reformation", "Hope" and "Redemption" the film uses poetry and prose written by British-Somali poet Warsan Shire as well as Beyoncé's music to serve as a visual accompaniment to her 2016 album also entitled Lemonade. 
Moving, powerful and deeply affecting, Lemonade delivers a jolt of energy and a sucker punch to the face. Miriam Bale for Billboard called Lemonade a film that is made by black women, stars black women and is for black woman, but trust me when I say that this is film is extremely enjoyable for all audiences and celebrates diversity and feminism in beautiful and magical ways that all women can embrace and relate to. 
This film changed the way that I saw Beyoncé forever and made me love her music all the more, it's a must see film for women everywhere. 
FINAL SAY: You betta call Becky with the good hair!
4 Chilli Peppers ​

The Beatles sang "All you need is love" and Bob Marley asked "Is this love that I'm feeling?" and Tina Turner asked the age old question "What's love got to do with it?" Yes for hundred, nay thousands of years; performers, writers, philosophers, singers, poets, artists and lovers all over the world have been trying to decipher and understand love in all of its guises in an attempt to make sense of this complex and often confusing emotion that we all yearn for and, if we are fortunate enough, get to experience.  
Love, love, love! Apparently its all around us according to the band Wet, Wet, Wet, but in reality, some of us never really get to fully experience it, so I think that it may be a little more complex than just 'being all around us.' One could also say that hate is all around us if we wanted to be a real Debbie Downer, and although I don't want to go there, I do want to start with opening a discussion around the perceptions of love. 
Being an abstract and intangible emotion, love is open to a million different interpretations.  This explains why some people think that love is pain and misery and others believe that love is the stuff that fuels cherubs and angels and makes everyone feel lovely and fuzzy inside. The absolute truth is that your interpretation of love is going to be completely based on your personal experiences of love. If all of your important life relationships have been a total shit show, then your idea of love is going to be pretty different than that of a person who has been surrounded by nurturing and demonstrative relationships all of their life. And whether you realise it or not, your ideas and concepts about love are being formed from the moment that you are born and they keep on evolving and changing until you die. 
The first love that many of us will experience is the love that we get from our caregivers. Our mothers, fathers, grandparents, siblings and the people that surround us and care for us as we grow are going to lay the foundations of what we conceive love to be as we develop. These first early childhood expressions of nurturing and caring love often begin our journey into understanding love and expressing love. From these roots we will then grow to form four branches of love comprehension; these will be our understandings of physical love, mental love, emotional love and spiritual love. 
Physical love makes itself know through touching, hugging, kissing, closeness, presence and eventually sexual expression. I'm pretty sure that when Marvin Gaye said he 'needed some loving' in the song Sexual Healing, that he was talking about this kind of love. Physical love is expressed through the physical exchanges that we share with others or ourselves. Yes, I said ourselves, we do also need to love ourselves in all of the four forms as well, so don't be afraid to express self love either, it is an integral part of developing your full awareness of love. 
Then there is mental love which is comprehensive and thought provoking. It makes us ponder and want to express ourselves. Mental love is what makes writers and poets write and song writers compose and artists create. It gets inside of your mind and make neurons fly off in all directions. It give us bright shiny thoughts or dark depressive thoughts, depending on how we have experienced love. Love can be a creative or a destructive mental process, complex and ambiguous all at one. It can create mental dependencies or deficits but it can also liberate and free people's minds as well. When you are experiencing positive mental love this will often lead onto positive emotional love.
Positive emotional love is when you feel connected, wanted, seen and appreciated. You have the feeling that you are part of a tribe, a partnership or a bond. When people feel positive emotional love they will usually want it to continue and will eventually want to share it with others as well. Hence dating, getting engaged or marriage and of course having children (creating more people to join in with the awesome positive love experience). Positive emotional love experiences is what holds relationships together and is what feeds good relationships. Those good love endorphins are powerful and they make for powerful love bonds that can last a lifetime. They are also addictive as hell and once people have felt them, they will struggle to go without them. Yep, like Robert Palmer sang "You're gonna have to face it - you're addicted to love." It's super addictive stuff, because when it is good and emotionally connective, love sets off all the feel good hormones inside of our body and it makes us feel wonderful!
This is all good and well until we find ourselves without love or if a loving relationship fails. Now we have entered the realm of the Nine Inch Nails' song "Hurt" because failed emotional love is the hardest to overcome, and it is the also one of the most destructive forces on the planet. It creates hate, hurt, jealousy, anguish, depression, anxiety, unhealthy obsession and a whole string of other damaging problems. However, this is only the case if people become attached to their loving relationships. For hundreds of years Buddhists have been preaching the benefits of non-attachment, especially in our relationships with others, so that we don't become co-dependant and reliant on another to supply us with love and fulfilment. This is why we must always have healthy emotional love for ourselves as well, so that we can accept when others move on, break up or leave an emotionally loving relationship.  
All religions site the final limb of the love tree - Spiritual Love as generally being the most important kind of love for us to experience. Spiritual love is deeply meaningful, non- possessive and energy raising. It operates on a higher vibration than all mental, physical or emotional love and it is unconditional and eternal. Spiritual love is often used to express divine commitment or religious love and it cannot be removed, compromised or taken for it is within you always. You don't need to believe in God or follow any particular religion to experience spiritual love, it can be attained through meditations, quiet contemplations, time in nature and gentle self love practises. 
So, what do you know of love? Are you experiencing love in all of its guises? Are you loving yourself? Are you giving and receiving love in equal measure? These are all good things to ask yourself so that you are having more Wet, Wet, Wet love experiences than Nine Inch Nails love experiences. But for now, wherever you are and whatever you are feeling, I'm sending some big love to you. I sure hope you are feeling it x

THOR: LOVE AND THUNDER 
Release Date: 2022
Rating: M
Running Time: 125 mins 
Another Marvel film (the 29th in the Marvel Cinematic Universe to be precise - but who is counting right?) and a direct sequel to Thor: Ragnarok (2017). This instalment, directed by Taika Waititi takes some interesting and wacky new directions and surprisingly even has a romance element to the story line. 
Thor and his clan of trusty side kicks must face a new foe called Gorr- The God Butcher. Wielding the powerful Necro-sword, Gorr abducts all of the children from Asgard and plans to open the portal to Eternity which will grant him any wish that he desires. Thor attempts to enlist the help of other Gods to assist him in defeating Gorr. 
Featuring The Guardians of the Galaxy and some other old favourites from the Thor films like Valkyrie and Korg, there is plenty to like about this latest instalment. Natalie Portman is back as Jane Foster with a surprise twist, Christian Bale practically steals the show as Gorr - The God Butcher, Chris Hemsworth delivers Thor with his usual levels of good humour and ego, Taikia Waititi himself reprises his role of the Kronan gladiator rock-man Korg,  and Tessa Thompson shines as Valkyrie. Russell Crowe makes an appearance as well, but I'd hate to spoil that gem for you!
The soundtrack is saturated in Guns n' Roses hits, the characters present with equal parts charm and awkwardness and don't even get me started on the giant screaming goats, rainbow highway or kaftan wearing, meditating Thor. Love and Thunder is truly madness and magic of the best kind; in short, it's totally great fun!
FINAL SAY: I want to choose my own path, live in the moment. My superhero-ing days are over. 
3.5 Chilli Peppers ​

Vagus is the Greek word for "wanderer" or "traveller." So it's the perfect name for a nerve that runs all the way through your body. The Vagus nerve starts at your brainstem and travels down the front of your neck via the carotid artery and then passes through your cardiovascular system, your digestive system, your reproductive organs and even touches on your vital organs as it moves along a neuronal superhighway, taking in information and passing along messages back to your brain. What a busy little nerve right? Well, it's actually not that little at all, it's the largest nerve in your body and it covers more internal ground than any other nerve inside of you. 
Aside of being huge and covering a lot of ground, it also does a lot of things whilst it is traversing about inside of you. The Vagus nerve is responsible for:

• Preventing inflammation
• Assisting with memory making
• Helping you to breathe
• Calming you down when you're stressed out
• Carry information from your gut to your brain
• Carrying messages between your liver, lungs, heart and brain
• Regulating your HPA axis which controls your stress responses
• Stimulating contractions on the GI tract
• Lowering your blood pressure
• Slowing down your heart rate when you are anxious or overworked

The Vagus nerve is the most influential nerve in our parasympathetic nervous system and it controls our moods, our immune responses, our crucial body functions and our digestion capabilities, so it is fair to say that we need to nurture it. 
Good new is that you can actually take care of your Vagus nerve and stimulate it by doing a few simple things. Turns out that your Vagus nerve loves:

• Cold showers or washing your face with cold water.
• Singing and humming
• Yoga and exercise
• Deep breathing and meditation
• Social connectedness and nurturing relationships 
• Laughter
• Gargling
• Massage
• Eye rotation and brain gym exercises
• Small amounts of UVA light 
• Omega-3 fatty acids 
• Fibre 
• Probiotics

Woah, turns out that the old Vagus nerve and I have quite a lot in common! I love most of these things as well! So, when it comes to taking care of my Vagus nerve, you could say that I am already 'the King' in that department.

ELVIS
Release Date: 2022
Rating: M
Running Time: 159 mins
A biographical and musical tale about the life of iconic rock star Elvis Presley. Directed by Baz Luhrmann, who co-wrote the screenplay with Sam Bromell, Craig Pearce and Jeremy Doner, Elvis delivers all of the dazzle and pizzazz that we have come to love about Luhrmann's style and the entire film is greatly supported by Austin Butler's outstanding portrayal of the legend himself, Elvis Presley. 
Narrated through the eyes of his long time manager Colonel Tom Parker, we see Elvis's rise from his poverty stricken southern childhood to his desperately sad and final performances in Las Vegas prior to his premature death at only 42 years of age.
All of the ups and downs and the trials and triumphs are explored as we traverse the landscape of Elvis's short life which is brought to life in a truly spectacular and respectful fashion. I feel like I learned a lot about 'The King of Rock and Roll' through this film and a lot of what I learned did make me feel quite sad. In essence this really is a tragic tale that is genuinely moving and also deeply touching. 
Austin Butler has set himself up for a nod at the Oscar's this year with his amazing effort here and he is very well supported by Tom Hanks as the Colonel and young Aussie actress Olivia DeJonge as Priscilla. Overall, the music and costumes are incredible and like all Luhrmann efforts, they are always best seen on the big screen if you can. For an almost three hour film, there wasn't a dull moment, which is an achievement in itself!
FINAL SAY: Wise men say, only fools rush in. 
3.5 Chilli Peppers ​

It's really okay to tip over, in fact it is very normal to feel tilted from time to time, especially in our current times. What I mean when I say tilted is a state of feeling, well... just a bit off really. You're not really yourself in totality if that makes sense. You aren't upset or angry or depressed,  you're just a bit tilted - left of centre, misaligned, not on target.
You may feel a little tired or you could be recovering from a recent illness. You may be trying to manage too many things at once and feel a bit torn between tasks or expectations. You aren't quite firing on all cylinders and it can be a bit annoying, concerning, confusing or perplexing when it happens. 
Generally, the tilted feeling doesn't last all that long - just a couple of days. Just long enough for us to notice that we aren't feeling like our usual selves and hopefully set about rectifying the imbalance. The tilted feeling, when I get it, is a gentle nudge from my body to say that something needs my attention. It's a gentle nudge at first and if I ignore it, it becomes something much harder to ignore.  It stops being a list and starts to become a problem. 
I don't know who coined the phrase - listen to your body when it whispers so that you don't have to hear it scream, but they were certainly on to something. This whisper that they speak of is the tilted feeling that I am speaking of; a gentle listing just to remind me that I have gone off course and am heading in a bad, troubling, unproductive or dangerous direction.
Often I experience 'tilting' when I have failed to replenish my own needs and my personal battery is beginning to run low. I feel tilted in the early days leading up to an illness, when I have done too much in too little time or I have given myself too many social interludes without any time to diffuse in between. Being an introvert, this can happen to me very easily.
My listing feeling may start like a headache or a bit of brain fog. It can be a tired feeling where I will just desperately feel like I need to be alone or withdraw. It can be an ache in my shoulders or my legs or my back that doesn't stop me from doing things but is as annoying as hell. It can present as little melancholy and low in energy and I can seem aloof, bored, disinterested or short. It's not black, it's blue; it's not dark it's slow moving and dull, like a tone running in the background. It can be ignored, but it never should be because as I said, it's whispering not yelling yet. 
Over the years I have become an expert at knowing what to do when I start to 'list' and I am very good at catching myself before I go full tilt overboard these days. Check out my top tips:
TIRED?

• Go to bed early for at least 3 days straight - duh!
• Clear the weekend, and stay home from Friday evening to Monday morning - full reboot. 
• Turn off the TV early and go read a book in bed. 
• Nap - get into the habit of napping when you can, it's awesome to nap. 
• Skip the gym/ workout for a day or two, you'll be fine!
• Meditate, it's super rejuvenating. 
• Wear peppermint essential oil. 
• Drink less coffee and eat more apples - it does work!

ACHING?

• Book a massage asap.
• Take a couple of Panadol/ Ibuprofen. 
• Have a long soak in the tub. 
• Lie down and put your feet up. 
• Splash lavender  and bergamot in your diffuser to soothe anxiety and stress. 
• Cut out the alcohol and clean eat for a few days to reset your system. 
• Make a doctors appointment if this a repeated/ persistent pain. 

OVERWHELMED WITH RESPONSIBILITY?

• Order in for a couple of days, you're too tired to cook. 
• Say no to people until you can manage more. 
• Farm the kids out for a night of peace and quiet. 
• Listen to an audio book when you are in the car to unwind and change your thought patterns after work. 
• Do what needs to be done only, fuck the rest it can wait. 
• Delegate, are you sure this is all yours to do? Are there other people who could take a bit of the load for you? 
• Reprioritise, what is more important? Your health and wellbeing are always the most important thing, so listen to your body!

I seriously suggest that you do listen to your body when it is trying to speak to you, and trust me when I say that your body is communicating with you at all times - because it is! Those little twinges, they don't stay little if you ignore them. Those aches gets tougher, the tiredness gets bigger and the feelings get stronger, so do not pretend that you can't hear those early warning signs that you are getting from your body - act swiftly and get on with your life! 

BRINGING OUT THE DEAD
Release Date: 1999
Rating: R 18+
Running Time: 121 mins 
An American psychological drama film directed by Martin Scorsese, written by Paul Schrader and based on the novel of the same name by Joe Connelly. Bringing Out The Dead is easily the most original and unique film of 1999 and with a stellar ensemble cast, there's a lot to like here. 
An exhausted Manhattan paramedic (Nicholas Cage) fights to retain his sanity under the strain of his demanding and stressful job. A double graveyard shift tests his fortitude further as things for him, and his three co-workers, continue to escalate.
Nicholas Cage is really 'bringing out his dead' here, delivering a believably strung out and exhausted paramedic as he convincingly meanders around the edges of a complete meltdown. He is incredibly well supported by Ving Rhames, John Goodman, Tom Sizemore and Patricia Arquette, and although it isn't pretty, Bringing Out The Dead is genuinely interesting and thought provoking material. 
FINAL SAY: Saving someone's life is like falling in love. The best drug in the world. 
​3.5 Chilli Peppers ​

Mother's Day always gets me thinking about all of the wonderful women that I have shared my time, my triumphs and my tribulations with. I reflect on the women that have inspired me with their wisdom, kindness, generosity, patience and genuine care, not only for me but also for the the world around them. In my mind, Mother's Day is not just about whether you are an actual mother or not, it's also about whether you are the type of women who can demonstrate the qualities of being a good mother to others. 
Some women may never actual become mothers themselves, but they spend a great deal of their time caring for others. They bring out the best in others, they inspire and engage us with their mere presence and they nurture and develop the wellbeing of others. If that isn't embodying the qualities of a mother then I don't know what is. However, what I do know is that you certainly do not need to carry a child in your womb to embody the essence of motherhood and become a role model or inspiration to others. 
According to psychologists, in order to be be a good mother (or parent) you need to have a few skills and traits. These traits (not surprisingly) have nothing to do with how much money you have, how big your house is or how many toys or designer clothes you can afford for your family. In fact, most of these traits come from the wellspring of emotional intelligence - you know the stuff that I am always banging on about on my blog? Yep, turns out that emotional intelligence not only makes you a great person, it also makes you a kick arse parent as well. So let's take a closer look at the top ten great parent traits.
1. Patience: a bit of a no-brainer right? As mothers we need to have patience in buckets. Kids are messy and noisy and are often really annoying as well and this requires the patience of a monk to navigate. If you aren't meditating yet, I suggest that you do asap!
2. Multi-tasking: this is a hotly contested topic these days, because mindfulness teaches us that doing lots of things at once isn't actually that good or productive, but whoever said that clearly hasn't had a couple of kids to wrangle! If you can't deal with lots of things going on that you mostly have zero control over then motherhood probably isn't for you! 
3. Encouraging: Just like adults, kids are riddled with self doubt and fear. They need a lot of propping up and guidance and they also need to learn early on that it is okay to make mistakes and get things totally wrong. Encouraging resilience instead of perfection is a terrific way to support your kids and be a super mum. 
4. Intelligence: Hard to teach them if you don't know yourself. Having mental, physical, emotional and social intelligence is not only going to make parenting a shitload easier, it's gonna make you a bloody legend! Get smart and be smart!
5. Flexibility: As a mother you will need to be adaptable and resilient. When kids are around things can (and will) change in a heartbeat and you need to be able to adapt and accept that whatever will be will be, just like Doris Day said. 
6. Leadership Skills: Okay, no matter how much you want to, you can't boss the kids around, but if you have strong leadership skills then your kids are more likely to want to do the right thing on their own steam without you having to bark orders at them like a drill instructor. With positive role modelling and leadership, children will generally be able to lead more efficiently themselves. 
7. Dependability: You have to be good to your word if you want to be a good mother. Kids can smell bullshit a mile away and they do not take kindly to being let down by wayward or unreliable adults. They will also be more honest and trustworthy teens if you set a good example in the early years.
8. Compassion: Kids need comfort, they need a shoulder to cry on and a listening ear to confide in. Regardless of whether they are wrong or right, Children need to feel like their parents are in their corner and their feelings need to be validated just like adults do, so offer compassion without the side of judgement or shame. 
9. A Sense of Humour: Laughter is the best medicine - it's true. Teach your children to laugh at the world, themselves and their worries. By keeping things light you will reduce the stress and anxieties of the world and allow your children to find the smile in any situation. 
10. Self Awareness: Kids have no idea how to act, mostly they just go with whatever they think will work at the time, often they are way off the mark. Many times they will just mimic whatever you do, or your reactions to situations so you need to have a handle on your own modelling and choices. Work on your own self awareness so that you can be the best role model for your children. 

Now have you got all that? Easy right? 
There is no doubt that being a good mother/parent is a tough gig that requires your utmost attention and effort, but my god - the rewards! The rewards of having a wonderful relationship with your children far outweighs any difficulty or challenge that may arise along the way.
And as I said earlier, I have experienced all of these beautiful and loving things from many other women in my life and some of those women are not even mothers yet. So don't despair if you never got these things from your own mother because there are millions of amazing, loving, generous and nurturing women in the world that can offer you all of these things and so much more. 
So go on, be a great mother, or be like a great mother, or be a great woman or better yet, be all of those things - just be great! And on that note I will say - Happy Mother's Day to all of the wonderful women in  the world who give over of themselves to support, teach and nurture the lives of others. You are bloody amazing! 

PORTRAIT OF A LADY ON FIRE
Release Date: 2019 
Rating:  M
Running Time: 122 mins 
Every now and then, if you're lucky, you will happen upon a movie that is so enchanting and so beautiful that every frame feels like a piece of art, Portrait of a Lady on Fire is that movie. When it comes to romance, passion, adoration and fascination this historical French language film wins on all fronts, delivering something that is not only deeply contemplative but visually stunning as well. 
Marianne, a painter, is commissioned to paint a portrait of a troubled young woman named Heloise. Heloise's mother has been unsuccessful in getting her to pose for paintings and encourages Marianne to act as a hired companion to try and keep her portrait painting a secret. It is not long before Marianne becomes enchanted with Heloise, who is betrothed to another and the two women begin a controversial love affair.  
If you are looking for something that captures the subtilties and beauty of affection and love then this slow burning romance will sweep you away completely. It certainly swept me away, I was deeply moved by this film and really loved how powerful it made the simple act of observing another person. 
Noemie Merlant and Adele Haenel are unforgettably gorgeous as the two intertwined women and they are well supported by Valeria Golino  and Luana Bajrami who portrays another convincingly troubled character named Sophie. The film depicts women in various states of joy and peril and it is all delivered perfectly through the poised eye of director Celine Sciamma. This is truly unforgettable film. 
FINAL SAY: When you're observing me, who do you think I'm observing?
5 Chilli Peppers ​

I always feel like I have so much time when I start a school holiday break, but two weeks is never really as long as you would think, especially when you have lots of people to catch up with and appointments to keep. However, I am certainly not complaining, I am always deeply grateful for the respite and reset time and having a couple of weeks off to gather my bearings and reboot my system every 10 weeks or so is truly a god send. 
​In the last two weeks I have really used my time efficiently, swinging between obligation, organisation and pure indulgence, and I have loved every single moment of it.
The highlights for me were:

• Having cocktails with friends.
• Enjoying afternoon tea in the sun at the botanical gardens.
• A freshly baked morning tea at a dear friend's house.
• Walking the neighbourhood most fine days.
• Spending Easter with my loved ones.
• Hosting a pizza/movie night.
• Catching up with far away friends for brunch.
• Going to the ELVIS exhibition in Bendigo with the family.
• Sipping a 'Dark and Stormy' in a swanky bar with a buddy.
• Getting my hair and eyebrows tizzied up.
• Finally organising the the cable guy to hook up the Ethernet to my TV - so long Wi-Fi drop outs!
• Enjoying two meat smoker events.
• Going to the movies.
• Watching 16 films and finishing eight TV series.
• Reading four books.
• Cleaning out my jewellery cupboard and wardrobe - long overdue!
• Eating out at delicious restaurants four times.
• And I also took Craig to pick up his new whip for his 50th birthday - a brand new cherry red Mustang.

Never was there a happier man than Craig when he pulled up in our driveway in that car, smiling from ear to ear and more gleeful than I have seen him in an age. Craig has wanted a flashy car for as long as I have known him, which is almost 30 years now. He has saved and worked his arse off to make it happen and to see him get something that he has wanted for so long made my heart so full of joy. It was the icing on the cake of my already incredible holiday break. 
And so, like it does at this time every year, a new term begins and I return to the hamster wheel of work  for another couple of months, refreshed and relaxed after my epic break  but still always longing for the days ahead that offer me another round of respite and indulgent joy. 

I WANT YOU BACK
Release Date: 2022
Rating: MA 15+
Running Time: 111 mins 
A romantic comedy directed by Jason Orley from a screenplay written by Isaac Aptaker and Elizabeth Berger that actually delivers just the right mix of rom/com to work. 
Two recently dumped strangers team up in attempt to win back their exes through unscrupulous and underhanded methods. 
The storyline here is simple enough, but the cast are truly terrific and deliver their roles with tonnes of humour and likeability which really elevates this rom/com from predictable and basic to the halls of genuine enjoyment.
Charlie Day and Jenny Slate play the roles of the two devious and heartbroken friends with a plausible onscreen chemistry and they are very well supported by Scott Eastwood, Manny Jacinto, Clark Backo and Gina Rodriguez whom all believably fall into the messy love entanglement that ensues.
I Want You Back is no game changer, but for a rom/com this is a solid and enjoyable watch. 
FINAL SAY: We're each others sadness sisters. 
3 Chilli Peppers ​

When you are in a healthy relationship, things just seem to work. They aren't taxing, you don't have to compromise yourself or alter yourself to be accepted and appreciated and even though you may argue from time to time or occasionally traverse some troubled waters, you can generally bounce back, talk it out and move along with grace. 
Not all of our relationships in life are that good, in fact some of them can be downright toxic. Toxic relationships will test you, trial you and leave you feeling deflated and defeated and they can turn up in many different places. You could be in a toxic relationship with a partner, a sibling, a parent or even a work colleague. And these unpleasant relationships could be literally draining your resources and leaving you completely depleted.
Unfortunately, depending on the nature of the relationship, signs for toxicity can be subtle or very obvious and you may not even be noticing the red flags popping up because you are too close to the source to see what is going on. It's kind of like a 'can't see the woods for the forest' type of scenario. 
So, what are the signs to look for when it comes to identifying a toxic relationship? Well, let's get down to brass tacks and identify some things that you need to be on the lookout for. 
1. Lack of Support
Healthy relationships are supportive and caring, there is usually a desire to see others succeed so if there is competition or a lack of encouragement or care, this is cause for concern. Basically, if the time that you spend with someone no longer feels positive, if there is a lack of trust or care or if the other person is only ever worried or concerned about their own needs, then this is a red flag. 
2. Toxic Communication
If conversations are mostly filled with sarcasm, condescending tones and snide remarks then odds are the relationship is toxic. There will be a lack of kind or respectful talk and much of what is said will be delivered with contempt. You may find yourself avoiding contact with this person, avoiding their calls or doing other things just to avoid further argument or hostility. 
3. Envy or Jealousy
If you are constantly suspicious of someone's motives or have a feeling that you cannot trust someone, then you may have a toxic relationship on your hands. If someone treats you with suspicion, displays envy or jealous around your actions, choices or successes this is considered to be a serious red flag that should not be ignored. Controlling or manipulative relationships are extremely toxic and can be also become very dangerous and/ or abusive. 
4. Resentment
Healthy relationships let go and move along after problems or hiccups. Toxic relationships do not. Holding on to grudges and not letting go of things chips away at peoples ability to be intimate and trusting. Over time this gap becomes a chasm that cannot be crossed. Any relationship that nurses grievances and makes you feel unsafe to speak up is toxic. 
5. Disrespect
Any patterns of disrespect are cause for concern. Always being late, forgetting events, speaking to you poorly in front of other people, gaslighting you or saying provocative or insulting  statements are all part of a toxic relationship demographic. Consider patterns in these behaviours and how they affect your ability to have a healthy relationship with the person in question. 
6. Constant Stress
It is not normal to always fight with someone or to always have tension. Sure life happens, sometimes things do get stressful: a family member is ill, job loss, financial stresses happen, but if someone is always stressed without much reason and projecting this on to you, that is considered to be a toxic relationship trait. 
7. Ignoring Your Needs
Going along with whatever someone wants and says all the time is not healthy.  If you feel like putting forward your needs is going to trigger an argument then you have a toxic relationship on your hands. Also, if you clearly outline a need or boundary that needs to be respected and the person in question continues to ignore or disrespect that need, then is safe to say that this is a toxic one-sided relationship.
8. Walking on Eggshells 
Any relationship that laves you feeling like you are walking on eggshells is seriously toxic. if you worry about bringing up things, you feel like you'll provoke tension if you speak up and you always need to go out of your way to avoid conflict then you are in a very toxic relationship.

However, it is important to know that although many people assume that toxic relationships are doomed, this isn't always the case. The deciding factor? That both people in the relationship want to change. If only person is invested in creating healthy patterns, than there is unfortunately very little likelihood that things will get better. In order to move forward look for these positive signs that your relationship still has a chance:

• An ability to accept responsibility 
• A willingness to invest in the relationship
• An ability to shift from blame to understanding
• Openness to outside help and support

With time, patience and diligence, toxic relationships can be improved, so don't be afraid to acknowledge if you are struggling with a toxic relationship that requires further support or intervention. Make sure that what you are experiencing isn't an abusive relationship rather than a toxic one and again seek support and guidance if you feel like this may be the case. 
We aren't all blessed with high functioning, loving or supportive relationships and no-one has to tolerate being treated poorly or being disrespected. Toxic relationships are extremely hard work and can be exceptionally detrimental in the long run, so always remember your worth and the importance of healthy relationships. You deserve to have good healthy relationships, so don't settle for being treated poorly by the people who should treat you better. 

PALMER
Release Date: 2021
Rating: MA 15+
Running Time: 111 mins 
An American drama directed by Fisher Stevens, written by Cheryl Guerriero and released on Apple TV+ streaming services, Palmer delivers a simple story that offers just enough heart and honesty to not feel forced or cheesy. At it's centre, Palmer is all about people being given permission to just be themselves and it is delivered in the most touching way. 
Eddie Palmer returns to his home town after a 12 year stint in jail. Staying with his grandmother and desperate to find a job and improve his station, Palmer attempts to walk a straight line. However, in a small town, people don't forget easily and he soon finds himself involved in the problems of others, especially his problematic neighbour and her flamboyant son Sam. 
Touching is an understatement, this film is deeply moving and heartfelt. And although it isn't necessarily delivering anything new or original, what is lacks in artfulness and mastery it makes up for with good intentions and likeable characters.
Justin Timberlake proves that he can do a lot more than sing and dance by shining in his lead role as Eddie Palmer, and he is well supported by Juno Temple, June Squibb and Ryder Allen as the delightfully colourful character, Sam. 
Make sure you have a tissue at the ready, this film will get to you.
FINAL SAY: I know you're mad at me. It's okay. I'd be mad at me too. 
3 Chilli Peppers ​

Your mind, like mine, consists of three different modes of thinking. When we are doing mundane or neutral types of activities like driving, brushing our teeth, shopping or running errands, we are usually engaging our Rational Mind. And when we are having times of high fear, excitement, sadness or joy we are engaging our Emotional Mind and coming in third place  is the ideal state of mind that we don't engage as often as should, and it is called our Wise Mind. 
Let's take a better look at these three states of mind because doing so will help you to understand yourself a whole lot better. In fact, if you can identify when you are triggering automatic responses from these modes of thinking you're going to able to to save yourself a lot of heartache and worry down the road. 
Firstly, let's examine the Emotional Mind. Basically, this mind kicks into gear when our thinking gets triggered by our external experiences of the world, for example:

• When you are arguing or disagree with someone.
• When you are fighting the urge to have a drink .
• When you procrastinate.
• The feelings you get from certain people, places or events. 

In general, the emotional mind is not impartial, it is reactive and it can be crippling. It can hijack our thoughts and sweep us over like a tsunami with dread, anger, sadness, fear, anxiety and many other big and often unhelpful thoughts and feelings. 
Next comes the Rational Mind which is pretty much opposite to the Emotional Mind. The rational mind bases all of its decisions on facts, evidence and things that worked well for us in the past. Situations that engage the rational mind may be things like:

• Deciding what to cook for dinner.
• Driving to work.
• Planning an event or social gathering.
• Learning a new language.
• Fixing a leaky tap or changing a flat tyre. 

The Rational Mind is straightforward, logical and thinking and because it is quite polarised to the Emotional Mind it can create great inner turmoil within people when they are trying to be decisive or precise. 
Enter the third state of mind - The Wise Mind. The Wise Mind is the ideal mind because it takes into account both the Rational and the Emotional mind without allowing them to conflict or overwhelm each other. Rather than allowing the Rational mind to wag its authoritarian finger at the sensitive Emotional mind, it instead seeks to build a bridge between the two and encourages a sense of harmony and acceptance. 
The Wise Mind honours and accepts emotions whilst taking into account the facts by working in a manner that is reasonable. 
A Wise Mind is mindful, aware, observant, patient and kind to us and that is why is we need to try and engage it as often as we can. 
Another way to conceptualise the three Minds, is to imagine how they might form a dialogue with one another. 
Rational Mind: You should get out of bed and go to the gym, you have a lot to do today.
Emotional Mind: I don't feel like getting up, you're stressing me out!
Wise Mind: I can feel stressed out and still get to the gym, I know that I will better once I have gotten my workout done for the day. 
Good old Wise Mind always finds the happy medium that is required to get the job done! And that's why we need to try really hard to recognise which state of mind we are using most of the time by being mindful and aware. This allows Wise Mind to take the reigns and make far better choices, decisions and pathways so that we can stay calm, focused and fresh. 
Being mindful about your 'mind state' will make your life easier and has been proven to assist in the management of anxiety and also to help individuals to identify unhelpful and hijacking thoughts that they entertain within themselves. Engaging your 'Wise Mind' is deeply self empowering, try it for yourself!

FRESH
Release Date: 2022
Rating: R18+
Running Time: 114 mins 
An American thriller film adapted from a screenplay by Lauryn Kahn and directed by Mimi Cave, in her directorial debut. Fresh delivers a unique blend of storytelling that is part American Psycho and part Silence of the Lambs with a sprinkling of Delicatessen and a side of How to be Single, and somehow it works!
Noa is struggling to find a suitable partner when she bumps into Steve in the fruit and vegetable aisle of the supermarket. Steve is handsome, smart and romantic and after several dates the new couple decide to go on a holiday together. Whilst on holidays, Noa discovers the truth about Steve; who he really is and his extremely disturbing appetites.  
This film is greatly strengthened by the terrific performances. Daisy Edgar-Jones and Sebastian Stan are really solid here which adds a lot of credence and jet black humour to the story. There's plenty of gripping and disturbing interludes, some nice little twists and some pretty nasty behaviours to wrangle, but overall it's an enjoyable ride. 
FINAL SAY: It's about giving. Giving yourself over to somebody. 
3.5 Chilli Peppers ​

Everyone in our home has now popped out the other side of our gross Covid-19 experience and we are making solid attempts to resume some normality and get back into the groove of daily life again. A little easier said than done though, because the post-Covid drag is real and you do tend to wear out easily and feel like you want to lie down a lot more than you normally would. This tendency to want to get horizontal a lot more than you typically would is, as you would imagine, really inconvenient and not very conducive to getting shit done. This has proven to be really annoying for me because I generally like to burn the candle at both ends and get a lot of bang for my buck when it comes to my everyday routine. 
​Unfortunately, my post-covid body doesn't really seem to like 5.30am yoga and it certainly doesn't seem to like much of anything after 9.30pm in the evenings except sleeping.  It also seems highly reluctant about doing 10,000 steps a day and it isn't nearly as invested in meal preparation as it was pre-covid, which has made dinner, lunch and breakfast periods feel like their own form of fresh hell three times a day as I try to navigate even the simplest of tasks in the kitchen with a heady mixture of disinterest and exhaustion.
As a consequence, our meals have been basic at best, my fitness has dropped off and I am not beating the alarm with anything except my fist in the mornings at the moment. And it's fine, I know that this level of reduced energy is to be expected and is completely normal but I am quite impatient and I have found the frailties, fragilities and failings of my body genuinely frustrating. 
According to Tania Mucci-Elliot, a doctor and expert on infectious diseases, the reason that we feel so fatigued during and after Covid-19 is because our immune system goes into overdrive, releasing chemicals called cytokines that trigger inflammation, fever and tissue death. Covid-19 is a systemic illness and affects many parts of the body, such as the respiratory mucosa, the kidneys, the fat cells and even parts of the brain. After this type of stress response, your body needs to go into rest-and-recovery mode, which causes the severe post-covid fatigue that people complain about.
Basically it's like your body has just run a marathon and it needs to reset. Signs of fatigue and tiredness is the way that your body prompts you to rest and take a break and you need to respond by putting up your feet. So doctors are recommending lots of rest, lots of water to flush your system out and being super vigilant about leaving things that aren't a priority for the first few weeks after infection and just getting the important stuff done. 
Easier said then done for someone like me who usually likes to race about like a rocket, but I really don't have a lot of choice, my body isn't wiling to allow me to go much faster than a snail at the moment anyway, so feet up and chilling out as much as I can is what the doctor is ordering and who am I am to argue with the experts? 

ROCKETMAN 
Release Date: 2019
Rating: MA 15+ 
Running Time: 121 mins 
A musical biography film directed by Dexter Fletcher and written by Lee Hall and based on the life of singer/ songwriter Elton John. Rocketman received huge critical acclaim and a number of awards largely due to Taron Egerton's incredible portrayal of John, but also for the unique and creative use of music, costume design and engaging choreography. 
At an addiction rehabilitation session, Elton John recounts the events of his life from childhood to present day. Through a series of musical numbers Elton recalls his troubling childhood, his rise to fame, his struggles with addiction, his relationship to best friend Bernie Taupin and his often traumatic love life. 
​Taron Egerton is dynamite as Elton John, delivering a powerhouse and mesmerising performance. The entire film feels fresh and original in structure and delivery, which is why I felt like it was more art house than drama, but to be clear there is plenty of drama going on here. The music is hypnotically good and it was almost impossible to not sing along with some of the numbers as I watched.
Like all good musical tributes you're left with a sense of just how much great music Elton John has delivered to the world. However I also found this film quite sad because it so clearly highlights how no amount of fame or money can ever fill some very deep holes that some performers seem to harbour inside of themselves, and Elton John's story certain demonstrates that. 
​FINAL SAY: You've got to kill the person you were born to be in order to become the person you want to be. 
​3.5 Chilli Peppers ​

On 28th January 2020 the first case of the Covid-19 pandemic arrived in Australia. And for over two years I have been blogging on and off about it. I've written about lockdowns, vaccinations, self care and mental wellness around the pandemic and although it had touched many around me, I had been fortunate enough to avoid contracting it myself. 
Well, on March 9th 2022 that all ended when that crusty bastard known as the Omicron variant finally made it's way all the way out to bum fuck nowhere (aka Enfield) to track me down, slap me down and steal my lunch money.
Poor Seth was the first to succumb to it, then I contracted it four days later and then just when Craig thought he was going to have a little freedom from his close contact isolation, he got it on day seven of exposure. Yep, we all got a go around, aren't we lucky? Thank goodness that we have all had three vaccination boosters, which meant that our symptoms were mostly moderate and thankfully also short lived. The middle two days were definitely the hardest, which for me coincided with my birthday which made it all the more painful to be honest. I mean no-one wants Covid-19, but they especially do not want it on their birthday; talk about a Debbie downer event. 
I became a proper Moaning Myrtle for a few days there. I felt tired, achy, melancholy and when I wasn't burning up, I was shaking with the chills. It was the pits! Seth was still in recovery himself, Craig was working from home so he was busy which meant that I was pretty much left to my own whiny devises for a few days, getting sadder and sicker by the hour. It was so gross and yuck! Worst still was my complete inability to move around a lot because it hurt to do that and my complete brain fog that prohibited me from being able to focus on any one thing for more than 5 minutes at a time. 
I couldn't go for a walk, or do yoga, or watch a movie, or read, or draw, or hold a conversation and I certainly could not complete even the most basic of tasks like cooking or cleaning (even myself - what a pong dog!). It was hard, and so many people were calling me for my birthday and making a genuine effort to be delightful for me and I was just like...what?...huh?...I can't focus right now....I need to lie down. And of course all of the cool plans that I had to go out for dinner on my birthday and the trip to Melbourne to see Moulin Rogue that I had planned were all kaput! Everything gone up in a big puff of covid-fuck-you -smoke! So, yep, I got low for a couple of days. I got run over by a bus, rag dolled down the side of a mountain and lay there at the bottom having a big fricken sook for a couple days and feeling desperately sorry for myself. 
Not my best days, I am willing to acknowledge that. And then on day four I thought, yeah fuck this shit, I am not doing this shit anymore. And I got up, got showered and pulled my shit together because I haven't come this far to only come this far. I haven't worked my ass off on myself, on my wellbeing and my zen to let some pandemic come and take me down. So I said no to all of my whiny first world bullshit problems and did a big turn around, I looked for the positives:
1. I am not going to die (big fricken plus right there)
2. I have people here to keep an eye on me
3. I have loads of people offering me support and love  
4. I am isolating in lovely Enfield where the birds are singing and the green is on fleek
5. I have more than a week off work mid-term 
6. I can watch crappy reality TV because I have good streaming services
7. I have plenty of food, toilet paper, clean water and cosy/comfortable places to rest 
8. I am over the worst of it and I am doing fine
9. Nothing is lost, it's just on pause 
10. There will be other birthdays...lots more of them. 
And then boom, a shift in my mindset occurred and I dusted myself off and realised that although painful, sometimes 'going wrong' can actually be a deeply cathartic experience. There's nothing like a little comedown to make you appreciate your usual health, vitality and capabilities so much more. As I said in my last post, I had been living my best life this year, going out every weekend and having a lot of wonderful and fulfilling experiences, and every intelligent person knows that if you eat high on the hog every damn day then eventually you'll get sick. It was just our turn, it happens to us all, it was a setback and nothing more than that. The fact that I can even have Covid19 and still find a silver lining makes me a pretty lucky person in my eyes, I got this. 

RON'S GONE WRONG
Release Date: 2021
Rating: PG -13
Running Time: 107 mins 
A computer animated, science fiction/ comedy film directed by Sarah Smith and Jean- Phillipe Vine. This is the first animation feature film from Locksmith Animation and TSG Entertainment; and a mighty fine effort in my opinion. 
A tech giant known as 'Bubble' has created the B-Bot. A robot companion that is designed to help children to make friends. Pretty soon everyone has one, except for Barney, a struggling social outcast who is desperate to fit in.  Barney believes that everything is finally going to change for him when he gets a B-Bot for his 12th birthday. However,  unbeknownst to him, his B-bot called Ron has been damaged, making it unlike any of the other bots on the market. 
This is some seriously funny material, I was laughing out loud a lot of the time. The voice actors, who delivered their material remotely due to the Covid-19 pandemic are all genuinely terrific, especially Zac Galifianakis who brilliantly voices Ron and pretty much steals the entire show. However strong performances must also be acknowledged from Jack Dylan Grazer, Ed Helms and Olivia Colman. 
​Aside from all of the humour, there is also a super strong message here about friendship, acceptance, understanding and the gross misuse of social media platforms by young people today that I think that many children would benefit from hearing. 
Overall, Ron's Gone Wrong is a  hidden gem that you may have overlook amidst the giants of 2021, but it is definitely worthy of your time. 
FINAL SAY: A bird has commented on your face. 
3.5 Chilli Peppers ​

So, I have happily been living my best life. Doing lots of things, getting out amongst the people and having a bloody lovely time. Dinner with friends, a big live music event, an athletics event, a day at the spa and woohoo, with my birthday coming up I was getting pumped for a few nights out, a long weekend (which always occurs around my birthday) and a visit to Melbourne to see Moulin Rogue. 
And then on Saturday poor Seth tested positive to covid-19 and everything had to come to a grinding halt and we were all thrown into seven days of isolation. Oh well, no point crying over spilt milk as they say. Such is life - c'est la vie! Things happen and I have clearly had a very good run over the last couple of months so I have nothing to complain about, and besides as yet (fingers crossed it stays this way) Craig and I have both been testing negative so far; so as long as I don't contract the virus myself over the next four days, I could still make it to Moulin Rogue and all will not be lost. 
​This is the first time that Craig has had to work from home and it's a whole new world for him. Finally, he is getting to see that not being on site is far from ideal and that things are actually ten times harder and twice as annoying to co-ordinate from a distance. Also, I am not sure how I am going to put up with his crazy antics for the next week because, although he is amusing himself around here being loud and a boisterous, he is actually annoying the shit out of Seth and I  who just want to chill out, rest and watch movies.
I don't have to work from home this week, because I really can't, so I have taken the week as sick leave. So I just want to enjoy the down time to be honest. However, it's a bit hard to do that when you've got a bear sized man meandering about the house shouting out random things, talking to himself about work and just generally poking everyone in the ribs because he can't manage being locked up at home and it's only Monday for fuck sake! 
God only knows what state we all be in by Friday if he doesn't manage to calm his farm a bit. Because although a week of no work and relaxation sounds like heaven, it is anything but when you have to be locked in with someone who is not coping well with the situation and cannot read the room and gauge their actions based on the people around them. 
This could actually be a very long week....

BO BURNHAM: INSIDE 
Release Date: 2021
Rating: MA 15+
Running Time: 87 mins 
Written, directed, filmed, edited and performed by comedian Bo Burnham during the Covid-19 pandemic lockdown of 2020, this unique film is a collection of Burnham's songs and skits in response to his deteriorating mental health and the world's obsession with social media during isolation and enforced lockdowns. 
This entire film feels deeply personal, and that's because it is. We literally get an intimate glimpse inside the head of Bo Burnham, delivered through original music, stand up comedy and meta-commentary. What Burnham manages to do in 87 minutes is take his audience on a ride, delivering something that feels so fresh and genuine that you can't look away.
It's a little bit theatrical, quite heavy on the sarcasm, with a smattering of dark humour and some beautifully bleak and honest storytelling about the social and emotional effects of isolation, in a word it's riveting!
Critics lauded the special's presentation of the Covid-19 pandemic, which he never actually mentions by name at any stage during the film, and he became the first person to win three Emmy's individually in a single year after he took the directing, writing and music direction awards in 2021. 
Bo Burnham: Inside was definitely my favourite comedy of 2021 and it shouldn't be missed.
FINAL SAY: White woman's Instagram!
​4 Chilli Peppers ​

At the moment I have been doing a lot of work and putting a lot of consideration into the ways that I can support the children in my workplace to become more emotionally intelligent. First and foremost, for anyone to become more emotionally intelligent they need to understand what it means to be emotionally intelligent and what being aware of and in control of your emotions can offer you in the long term.
I myself have spent a great deal of time over the last five years practising, refining and building my own levels of emotional intelligence and it has really made me a much kinder, more patient, more accepting and generally better person that I used to be. When I think back to the way that used to behave and the things that I used to say, I practically flush with embarrassment! The way that I chose to present myself to others and how little tolerance I had for, not only my own emotions, but also the emotional needs of others, was actually quite disgusting and unacceptable. 
Unfortunately, I was not taught to be tolerant, kind or aware of my own emotions or the emotions of others when I was younger and as a consequence I turned out to be a bit of a judgemental asshole in my teens and early adult years. It actually took me many years of deprogramming and reprogramming to eventually arrive at where I am now. And now, I value emotional intelligence, kindness and patience above everything else, but I had to work hard to understand that and I wonder every day who I may have become if only I had learned these things a lot earlier. 
As a society in general, we teach children from a very early age to value intellectual intelligence (book smarts) and physical intelligence (sporting prowess) over spiritual intelligence and emotional intelligence. Even though we all know that we need all four intelligences to live a balanced and joyful lifestyle, we just don't really spend a lot of time fostering children with their ability to be spiritually or emotionally intelligent. And why do we do this?
Honestly, I think that it is because a lot of adults themselves are not very spiritually or emotionally intelligent, and you can't teach what you don't know. We also as a society don't generally see those attributes of spiritualism and emotional awareness to be as valuable as being book smart or physically put together, so we tend to feel comfortable with not teaching children these skills directly.  However, I do see some fundamental problems with this thinking, and I also see a lot of children struggling to find meaning and strong relationships in their over stimulated and over-informed worlds. 
Children today have abundant and never ending access to information thanks to devices, social media and high speed Wi-Fi. Which is great, but they also have, as a consequence of this and all the COVID-19 lockdowns and shut ins;  less face to face interactional ability, less understanding of feelings, thoughts, and appropriate emotional responses within themselves and others, less connection to community and less of a sense of belonging to something bigger than themselves. In short, kids today are becoming more confused, jaded and unaware of how they present in the world than ever before. And in my opinion it is the responsibility of all parents, caregivers, educators and support people to up their game around educating young people about their emotional intelligence and emotional wellbeing. 
There are five main areas that I have identified as areas of great need in children today and I believe that we all need to shift our attention and teachings towards these key points if we want to improve emotional intelligences. 
Self Awareness: The ability to recognise and understand your moods, emotions and drives, as well as their affect on others. Hallmarks - Self confidence, realistic self assessment ability and a self depreciating sense of humour. 
Self Regulation: The ability to control or redirect disruptive impulses and moods. The propensity to suspend judgement - to think before acting. Hallmarks - Trustworthiness and integrity. Comfort in ambiguity and openness to change. 
Motivation: A passion to do things for reasons that go beyond reward or status. A propensity to pursue goals with energy and persistence. Hallmarks - Strong drive to achieve. Optimism in the face of adversity. Organizational commitment. 
Empathy: The ability to understand the emotional makeup of other people. An ability to treat people according to their emotional reactions.  Hallmarks - Expertise in building and retaining friendships. Cross cultural sensitivity. Calmness in the face of adversity/ discomfort. 
Social Skills: Proficiency in creating and maintaining relationships with peers and adults. An ability to find common ground and build rapport. Hallmarks - Acceptance of change and differences. Understanding of the nuances of friendships and the 'give and take' dynamics of strong relationships. 

However, as I said earlier, you can't teach what you don't know. So I suppose as adults and stewards for future generations, we must first look at ourselves and address what types of emotional strengths we are delivering and depicting at the front line of society ourselves.
Are we being emotionally intelligent?
Do we meet the key 'emotional intelligence' criteria listed above? 
Are we helping or hindering our youths to become the best version of themselves?
These are questions that we need to be willing to ask ourselves and address if we are to set a respectable standard. The days of "don't do as I do, do as I say" aren't going to cut it for our highly informed young people, they demand and expect better than that, and why shouldn't they? And in response to that, we adults now need to lead by exceptional example, which means that each and every one of us has a responsivity to improve our own emotional intelligence so that we can teach, empower and educate others. 
So please, do yourself a favour and start working on your own emotional intelligence now, you are going to need it in days to come, trust me!

DUNE: PART ONE
Release Date: 2021
Rating: M
Running Time: 155 mins 
Easily the most anticipated movie of 2021, Dune: Part One was originally scheduled for release in 2020 but was delayed due to the COVID-19 pandemic which only served to heighten the hype around this blockbuster science fiction film. The third attempt at an adaptation of Frank Herbert's epic novel, Denis Villeneuve's Dune: Part One sports a massive ensemble cast and some unforgettably spectacular visuals whilst also managing to deliver something that could best be described as ambitious and seriously intriguing. 
Paul Atreides has valuable magical abilities that he inherited from his mother, but he is also the heir to a noble family bloodline. The House Atreides has been tasked with ruling an inhospitable world where the only thing of value is "spice," a magical substance with many uses that is also capable of extending life and enhancing consciousness. Coveted across the universe, spice is sought after and killed for, making Paul's destiny treacherous and deeply  important. 
Set in the distant future where inhabitants can access interstellar travel, this is an  exciting and emotionally charged hero's journey tale. There is a lot going here, both visually and audibly. Quite beautiful to behold, Dune looks incredible in every way and the actors are all perfectly cast here, especially Timothee Chalamet who just shines as Paul Atreides.  What this movie does do is set up a really strong and sound foundation for future Dune movie efforts to ride upon, and for that reason it feels a little slow at times, but I honestly believe that the pay off is yet to come here. 
What I did see, I liked a lot. What I heard, I also really liked a lot because Dune's soundtrack  is definitely Oscar worthy. Bottom line is that I definitely want to see more of this, so well done Villeneuve, you now have my full attention. 
FINAL SAY: Dreams make good stories, but everything important happens when you're awake. 
4 Chilli Peppers ​

I never wanted to live an ordinary life. I never wanted to just get by, survive or 'get on with things,' even when they may not be very enjoyable or exciting. All my life I have longed for adventure, experience and growth; in every aspect of my life. I love to find new things, new sounds, new flavours, new ideas and new ways of being. I love to travel, I love to discover and I desperately try to improve my intelligence, my station and myself in some way, shape or form every year that I am on the planet. I never signed up for average and I refuse to live a mediocre life. 
There are millions of ways that you can support a more meaningful life that isn't difficult, expensive or hard to incorporate into your current routine. And these things will guarantee you a more enriched, fulfilled and interesting life. I have done a lot of these things myself and I can say without a shadow of hesitation that I live an extremely abundant life.
I eat well, sleep well, drink well, exercise, meditate, study, share, laugh, read, write, absorb and indulge myself on the daily.  I love to socialise and I also love being alone. I love to get things done and I love to waste time smelling the flowers and watching the clouds and the stars in the sky. I take time to watch sunsets, sip coffee and eat at the table with family and friends. I love to cook, take daily walks, watch movies, draw, listen to music and dance. I may not be great at these things, but I love to do them and they bring me joy. I have a very rich lifestyle and I am not ashamed to say it. And to do that, I had to stop being average. 
You can stop being average too you know. 
So many people are happy to just get by and go through the motions day to day, not really getting into it but not really getting out of it either. Some people are happy with average, and that's cool, 'go you' I say. But I am not happy to live my life in that way, and if you want some tips on how to enrich your life, say farewell to dull and kick average living to the curb, then I have some great tips for you that you can start to do right now. 
​So, let's get cracking!
1. Start spending some time each day reflecting on how things went and how you feel. That doesn't mean wallowing in your poor choices over a glass of wine everyday, it means writing your thoughts and feelings down daily in a journal. This will allow you to track habits, discover your triggers and open up some space for you to express yourself. It's very liberating to know yourself. 
2. Read. I mean it, you have to read. Even if it just a few pages of something a day. Get into the habit of reading and expand your vocabulary and knowledge a little each day.
3. Learn to love being alone. Spend at least half an hour alone every day. What you do with that time is up to you, but do it without the need to communicate with anyone and without interruptions. It's easier said than done for many people, but be vigilant. You'll be surprised where your mind will go and how much you'll gain from being able to sit with yourself. 
4. Find an exercise that you like and start doing it regularly. That doesn't mean you have to be sweating it out at the gym (but it's also great if that is your thing). It can be as gentle, mild and as innocuous as a walk if that's all that you can muster. Just find something you like to do that gets you moving and commit to doing it regularly. Exercise releases loads of feel good endorphins and hormones and will move you from average to awesome very effectively. 
5. Challenge yourself to learn something new at least once a month - preferably not related to your work. Not only will you be learning a new skill and improving yourself on the daily, you will also stave off boredom and early onset Alzheimer's, and you'll boost your mood and your brain health.  It can be as simple as a card trick, a board game or a new way to save money. Or you could go hard and learn something that takes up a lot more time and energy like learning how to fly a plane, speak another language or even scuba dive! Find something that excites you and go for it!
6. Take care of yourself! You have one body, its got to last you for the duration so respect it! Find out how to eat a healthy balanced diet, how much water you should drink, how much sleep you need and how to take care of your skin, hair and nails. Take a multivitamin, meditate, stretch and minimise your body trauma by cutting back on nicotine, alcohol and junk foods. Your body will thank you for your efforts for many years to come!
7. Surround yourself with great people who inspire, support and/or love you unconditionally. Start to put boundaries around how much time and energy you invest in people who make you feel used, exhausted or undervalued. It's your life, share it with people who are deserving of your time. 
8. Reward yourself every single day with something that you think is marvellous. Could be as simple as a good cup of coffee, a long hug with a darling, a favourite TV show, a piece of excellent chocolate or an extra ten minutes in a good hot shower. And it could be something more consistent that you can look forward to, something that you could add to your regular routine like a monthly massage, a weekly yoga class, a fortnightly dinner with a friends. In short, find what gives you joy and 'get ya some' every damn day. 
​
Quitting average is one of the best things that you can be doing for your life right now, so why wait? Go find your joy, go find it today I say!

CODA
Release Date: 2021
Rating: M
Running Time: 111 mins 
A unique coming of age drama, written and directed by Sian Heder, CODA premiered at the 2021 Sundance Film Festival before being released on Apple TV+ in August of 2021 and quickly winning over audiences with it's emotionally engaging story. 
Ruby Rossi is the only hearing member of her family, making her a CODA - Child of Deaf Adults. Ruby is shy and a bit of an outcast at school, but she decides to join the school choir in an attempt to develop her hidden talent - singing. Ruby shows exceptional promise in the subject and is encouraged by her music teacher to apply for college, however with a family that depends upon her heavily to manage their fishing business and livelihood, stepping aside to pursuit her own dreams proves challenging.  
Nominated for a Best Motion Picture Golden Globe and a Best Supporting Actor Golden Globe for Troy Kotsur who portrays Ruby's deaf father in the film, CODA swiftly became a must see movie for 2021. 
And there is certainly no lack of feels to be felt in this movie, I got teary a few times as I watched this genuinely lovely and touching tale. The deaf people in CODA are genuinely deaf and the cast is very solid. Marlee Matlin delivers her usual levels of likeability and talent as Ruby's mother, Troy Kotsur give the term 'sensitive dad' new meaning and Daniel Durant gives us a believable and likeable older brother portrayal. Emilia Jones is utterly delightful as the sweet and often misunderstood teen Ruby, and the entire films swings between family loyalty and independence in an unforced and deeply tender way. 
CODA is a wonderfully heart-warming film that is definitely worth a watch. 
FINAL SAY: I really love to sing.  
4 Chilli Peppers ​