Tomorrow we leave for New Zealand. As a huge heat wave hits Victoria we are escaping to the cooler and more manageable climates of Auckland, Rotorua and Wellington for the better part of 10 days. This family holiday has been in the making for the last two and a half years and I have excitedly planned and booked this self guided trip around the North Island with a lot of enthusiasm and loving detail. I have tried to encompass all of the things that our family have show an interest in exploring whilst we're in New Zealand, even the things that may be pushing me well outside of my comfort zone like spelunking (caving) and zip lining, which means that without a doubt this is going to be an epic family adventure for all of us. 
I am drawing the line at bungee jumping and zorbing though, happy for the kids to throw themselves off bridges and toss themselves down hills in giant plastic balls, but I am not willing to be involved in that kind of stuff and nonsense. The last thing that I need before I head back to work is a back injury, broken arm or leg or worse; no thank-you! I am going to leave the high impact action to the young and brave of heart, besides I am more than happy to wait out their high octane antics from the comfort of a good day spa with a glass of delicious New Zealand wine in my hand. Have at it kids, I'm happy to find my own fun! 
This trip will be especially significant for Zoe because this trip is her 21st birthday gift - finally coming to fruition! It's one thing to give someone plane tickets and spending money as a gift, it's another thing altogether to finally get on to that flight and have the chance to spend that money overseas. So needless to say, the anticipation is high and the excitement has reached fever pitch.
We are all super excited to be going over to New Zealand as a family for what will probably be the last big overseas holiday that we all have together for quite some time. Zoe has overseas destinations that she wants to explore with her fiance and Craig and I have a few big ticket items to get done out here that will occupy our spending money for a while as well, so it's hard to say when we will have an opportunity as good as this again. In light of that, we are all heading to New Zealand with our sights set on having an absolutely marvellous time.
​So I bid you all a fond farewell as I depart the country for a spell, I will without a doubt have wonderful tales to tell upon my return.
Just like Bilbo Baggins in The Hobbit, I am going on an adventure! Perhaps my most favourite adventure of all time and I cannot wait!

THE FAVOURITE
Release Date: 2018
Rating: MA 15+
Running Time: 121 mins 
An historical period drama/ black comedy directed by Yorgos Lanthimos and written by Deborah Davis and Tony McNamara. After winning the Grand Jury Prize at the 75th Venice International Film Festival where it had it's world premiere, The Favourite has since gone on to receive further critical acclaim, praise and accolades for it's screenplay, cinematography, music, costume design and the stellar performances of the three lead roles portrayed by Olivia Colman, Emma Stone and Rachel Weisz. 
In 1708 whilst Britain is at War with France, Queen Anne (Colman) sits on the throne entertaining eccentric behaviours and struggling with her unpredictable emotions and eating patterns. Sarah Churchill (Weisz) offers the Queen counsel, advise and comfort in many and varied ways, and has always held the Queen's attentions and affections. That is until her impoverish cousin Abigail Hill (Stone) arrives and seeks to gain the Queen's affections and adorations over Sarah. An unspoken and vicious competition commences as the two women vie for the Queen's favour. 
I adore Yorgos Lanthimos as a director, he always brings a fresh and raw perspective to his storytelling and The Favourite may be my favourite of his movies so far. This film looks lush in every way, and the constant excessive indulgences really drive home the dreadfully wasteful and revoltingly spoilt lifestyles of the British Aristocracy of that period perfectly.
The acting is flawless and the three leads have been perfectly cast and the story is delivered in a wickly interesting way. Olivia Colman is looking mighty good for a Best Actress Oscar here, and Weisz and Stone bring a very real threat to the Academy Awards in their terrific support roles as well. This is unmissable stuff, a truly amazing cinematic experience. 
FINAL SAY: As it turns out, I'm capable of much unpleasantness. 
4.5 Chilli Peppers ​

Age gap is something that regularly comes up in random conversation and everyone pretty much has their own opinion around what is an acceptable age gap for a couple and what is not. To be honest, I generally don't give that much of a shit about age gap, but I would be lying if I said that I didn't find some age gap relationships a little over the top and somewhat cringe worthy. 
If you ask google what is an acceptable age gap it comes up with this interesting statement:
The rules state that by dividing your own age by two and then adding seven you can find the socially-acceptable minimum age of anyone you want to date. 
My first wondering about that statement is who actually created this so called 'rule' that they speak of? And their definition of a 'socially acceptable minimum age' is, in itself, an extremely grey area, I mean can people outside of this equation still be accepted into society or will they forever feel the sting of being ostracized for their forbidden passions? And why are they assuming that everyone wants to date someone younger than they are? What are the rules for older partners? 
If this statement is true then I could be dating a 29 year old which may not raise too many eyebrows, and if the same applies in reverse then I could also be dating a 73 year old, which may raise even more eyebrows. So, according to this google formula I can date anyone between 29 and 73 and no-one would be put out or offended, but if I started dating a 28 year old or a 74 year old, well that would just be getting freaky. 
I don't think that there really are any 'rules' around age gap dating, because we all know that love is love and that consenting adults have the right to date anyone that they want to. However, as I said earlier there are some age gap relationships that do make me feel uncomfortable. I don't think that people should be dating anyone that is the same age or younger than their own children, and I also don't think that people should date anyone older than their own biological parents either.
In my case, if I was to date someone around my children's age I would be seeing a 21 year old and if I was to date someone around my parents age then my partner would be in their 80's and I am not comfortable with either of those options. Now I know that everyone has their own personal boundaries around age gap dating, and I am not claiming that my choices are correct, I am simply stating that that is where I draw my line in the sand on age gap romances. 
Hollywood is notorious for putting massive age gaps in movies that no-one ever bats an eye at because they are usually younger women with older men; in fact an older man with a younger lady is generally not considered to be nearly as controversial as an older lady with a younger man is for some reason. Perhaps it is because we are conditioned to seeing more older men with younger women romance dynamics in cinema and as a result of that we have become conditioned to accepting it as normal. 
Here are some prime examples of older men with significantly younger women in romance films that defy the realms of acceptable, and yet no-one seemed too bothered about them at all:
Drew Barrymore and Tom Skerritt in Poison Ivy - 42 year gap
Kevin Spacey and Mena Suvari in American Beauty - 20 year gap
Gary Cooper and Audrey Hepburn in Love in the Afternoon - 28 year gap
Woody Allen and Mariel Hemingway in Manhattan - 26 year age gap
Johnny Depp and Amber Heard in The Rum Diary - 23 year gap
Brad Pitt and Rose Byrne in Troy - 16 year gap
Gabriel Byrne and Winona Ryder in Little Women - 21 year gap
Richard Gere and Hilary Swank in Amelia - 25 year gap
Timothy Hutton and Natalie Portman in Beautiful Girls - 21 year gap
Tom Cruise and Olga Kurylenko in Oblivion - 17 year gap
Liam Neeson and Olivia Wilde in Third Person - 32 year gap
Denzel Washington and Lymari Nadal in American Gangster - 23 year gap
Hugh Laurie and Leighton Meester in The Oranges - 27 year gap
However, to be fair, Hollywood doesn't always get it wrong when it comes to age gap movies and there have been some truly tasteful and empowering age gap movies that are not only plausible but also liberating in terms of love and what both platonic and romantic love can look like. Some of my personal favourite recommendations are:

• Film Stars Don't Die in Liverpool - Jamie Bell and Annette Benning - 28 year gap
• The Reader - Kate Winslet and David Kross - 21 year age gap
• Harold and Maude - Ruth Gordon and Bud Cort - 52 year gap
• Leon the Professional - Jean Reno and Natalie Portman - 33 year age gap
• Lost in Translation - Scarlett Johansson and Bill Murray - 34 year gap
• The Graduate - Anne Bancroft and Dustin Hoffman- 10 year gap
• Seeking a Friend for the End of the World -Steve Carell and Keira Knightley - 22 year gap

At the end of the day, everyone knows that age is really just a number and that it can never define what is acceptable in terms of real love and meaningful relationships. I suppose that it is important to not get hung up on the actual age gap in a relationship but rather to look deeper at the parameters of that love and whether or not it is respectful, meaningful, plausible and genuine, and if it is indeed all of those things, then who am I to judge? 

There is nothing like the turning over of a New Year to reinvigorate the spirits and to get you thinking about how far you've come and where you'd like to be going for the next twelve months. I used to be completely bonkers about setting myself huge goals at the beginning of each new year, I used to be the resolution queen once upon a time. I spent hours and hours stupidly exhausting myself trying to maintain new year's resolutions and 'upgrade' myself.  I have since wised up and discovered that the turning over of the calendar from the 31st of December to January 1st has little or no reflection on how your year is going to play out and whether you will or won't achieve your set goals. Real change requires effort of a more consistent and repetitive nature than just flogging yourself silly for a few months, real change can take much, much longer than a calendar year could ever provide. 
What I have found, through a process of diligent goal setting and also wild abandon of all goal setting and letting the wind blow me where it may in a devil may care type of fashion, is that if you want something bad enough you don't need to set yourself a resolution to do it, you will just do it. If it matters to you, if you can make it a priority, then you will make it happen.
Just like those people in your life that don't see you for a long time and use the pathetic excuse 'that they were just too busy' to get around to catching up (which is quite frankly a load of horseshit) because everyone is busy and that excuse is just ridiculous! If you really want to see someone then you will make it a priority and you will see them. And the same goes for any other goals that you set for yourself in life, if it matters enough to you, then  you will make it a priority, and I guarantee that if can do that, then you will make it happen.
You do not need to write it on a calendar or drunkenly shout it off a balcony at midnight on news years eve to make it happen, in fact those flimsy pledges rarely go anywhere anyway.  If you can make something a non-negotiable aspect of your life, then you will see your goals come to fruition. 
​And that, I believe, is the key to all of life's successes. Consistent, continual, conscientious prioritising is what you need to make your goals a reality. Making new year's resolutions and dreamy promises to yourself does not get shit done, but committing to making your goals non-negotiable and essential in your everyday life does. Trust me, it's true, you cannot go halfway on your dreams and life goals, but you also do not have to make everything happen in a twelve month time bracket either.
The reason that so many people fail when it comes to resolutions and personal goals is because they didn't want it bad enough in the first place and/or they wanted it too soon. Every major goal that I have achieved in my life has taken me years to attain, and has generally required a fair amount of upkeep to sustain as well. The good stuff takes work, there are no shortcuts. In order to make changes in your life for the better, you are required to commit and persevere, even when you want to quit, you have to persist and be 100% non-negotiable to meet that goal. 
In January of 2015 my new years resolution goals were:

• Finish all of the reviews on my blog (I had 310 backlogged movies to review at that point)
• Do half an hour of exercise a day
• Drink more water
• Meditate twice a week
• Plan a get together once a month (with friends or family)

I set those goals for myself four years ago and I think that I have only just met them now, but again, I still have to work hard to maintain them. And there were also other major changes that I made to my life along the way to meeting those goals that I didn't write down or pledge to the world, I just made them a priority and was fiercely uncompromising with my efforts to achieve them.
I managed to quit smoking, started performing daily yoga and meditation practices, learnt to read and write Braille, maintained my daily journaling and also maintained my Spicywatch reviews and blog entries, and trust me when I tell you that sometimes, these things are hard to maintain. I too get busy, and  I want to cut corners and stop doing as much, but they are my life goals, they are things that I have made a priority in my life because I want to have a richer fuller life experience, and I will not compromise on my goals.
Real change takes time, a lot of time and a lot of consistent and continual effort. Unfortunately, personal upgrading is not just a flippant news year's resolution thing, it's a lot of hard work but it is also completely satisfying to set your sights on a better version of yourself and then achieve it. There is really no better feeling (apart from giving love and being loved) that I know of. So, yes, do set out to meet your life goals and push yourself forward, but do it realistically, knowing that it is going to take a lot of your time, effort and persistence to achieve and that what you set in motion in 2019 may not be your reality until 2025, and that that is okay as well....slow and steady wins the race my friends, so take your time and enjoy the ride! 

Another year is drawing to a close and what a wonderful year it has been for me. There have been so many highlights and so many special events, holidays and celebrations that I have been able to share with my family, my friends and my work colleagues this year that it is hard to know where to start. 2018 has truly been a year filled with great blessings, personal growth and many, many smiles.
I really like to make a list of the highlights of a year as it draws to close because it is so easy to forget just how many joyful things you do and get to be apart of; and how much you have achieved if you don't take stock on some level.  I always feel so deeply overwhelmed whenever I look back at everything that I have achieved and shared throughout the year and reflecting on a year is a really lovely thing to do that really helps you to count your blessings and focus on the abundance in your life. 
Here are my favourite highlights from 2018, all of which have brought me a great deal of joy, a sense of belonging, a feeling of enrichment and have provided me with many memories to reflect upon during the quieter and more contemplative times of the year. 

JANUARY:  Zoe and Lachlainn's engagement, Seth's 13th birthday, Jubilee Lake Picnic in Daylesford, Australia Day Fireworks, BBQ's and Drinks on the Enfield deck, TRUE - 30 days of Yoga program, Started my new job adventures. 
FEBRUARY: Chinese New Year- the Year of the Dog,  Rockabilly Festival, dinner and coffee dates with friends, Curry/movie night get togethers kicked off. 
MARCH: White Night Festival, International Women's Day, Cooking Day at Enfield  with friends, My Birthday, Jesus Christ Superstar, The Begonia Festival, The Arts Trail, the Egg Painting session at Enfield on Easter Saturday.
APRIL: Craig's Birthday, Eating Hot Cross Buns and good quality Chocolate on Easter Sunday, Dinner Parties, the Autumn School Holiday Break, Movie Nights at Enfield with mates, Apple and Quince harvesting. 
MAY: Mother's Day, The Festival of Light at the Great Stupa in Bendigo, a Daylesford Chocolate Mill visit, meeting Daniel Kish (aka. The Batman- echolocation expert), Spicywatch's 4th Birthday.
JUNE: Zoe's 21st Birthday, Winter Solstice Celebrations, Mushrooming, Completing my Level One Braille Qualification, Weekend Breakfast Dates with friends, the Winter School Holidays.
JULY: Alice in Wonderland at ACMI, Winter Movie Marathon nights, Flashy Cocktails and Long Lunches with my friends, When I Grow Up Art Exhibition, All day Baking and Soup making Sessions, Prospects dinners, eating Homemade Apple Pie with my Family. 
AUGUST:  Dinner parties, Dress-up Events at School (Book Week, 100 days of School, PJ day), committing to 30 days of 30 minutes of extra exercise (which I have continued with ever since).
SEPTEMBER: Father's Day, Seeing the Showcase Performance at school, Commencing 20 minutes of daily Transcendental Meditation (have also continued with this all year), the Spring School Holiday Break.
OCTOBER: Halloween horror movie/ dinner night, Rediscovered the joy of the local Botanical Gardens, School trip to Melbourne Zoo, Landcare Open Day, Cocktail and Perfume Night at The Lost Ones.
NOVEMBER: Bonfire Night, Anniversary weekend at Skenes Creek, Dinner Dates and Movie Nights, Sunday afternoon Live Music at Smythesdale Pub. 
DECEMBER: Dinner Party with friends, Having a KK to spoil and one that spoilt me as well, Staff Christmas function, Student Graduation, the Foundation Team Dinner, Summer Holidays kicking off, Christmas Day, Champagne Breakfasts, Reuniting with my nephew. 

Seriously, it has been the best year, I have so many things to be grateful for and so many reasons to celebrate what a wonderful life I have. On top of all of that, Spicywatch hit 11,000 return readers this month and I cannot tell you how wonderful it is to think that people are not only reading my blog and reviews, but are returning for more, it is just incredible to me. I am truly thankful to each and every Spicywatch reader for their continual check ins to my website, for their beautiful comments and their amazing support throughout the year. 
May 2019 bring you all much peace, much happiness and an abundance of all of the best things in life. I look forward to delivering more reviews and movie information to you all in 2019 and sharing my personal life experiences with you along the way as well.
Happiest of New Year's wishes to you all, may your resolutions be fulfilled, your hearts be full and your hangovers minimal; may you discover many new, enjoyable challenges and rewards in the new year and I hope that 2019 allows you to find your groove in all things,
Sending all of my love to you,
Happy New Year,
From Spicywatch xx

Today is Boxing Day and I have officially dropped out the other end of Christmas. What I am now experiencing is that numb sense of overwhelment and exhaustion that arrives in the days preceding Christmas time. I have indulged in copious amounts of rich and decadent deliciousness, I have drank enough alcohol to challenge the driest of sailors on shore leave and I have received the most amazing gifts over the last four days. In short, it has been tremendously busy and I have been tremendously spoilt all over again. Talk about your first world problems over here, too much of the good stuff for me that's for sure!
However, it wasn't all take and no give, I really had a wonderful time giving all of the gifts that I had shopped for and I made plenty of treats and delicious eats for others to indulge in. I also did my volunteer shift of Christmas gift wrapping and fundraising for the Salvos as well, so I actually got to give over quite a bit of my love this jolly season. Everyone knows that the giving is generally even more special than the receiving at Christmas time and it was so wonderful to spend time with my family and friends over the last few days in an unhurried, indulgent and relaxing way. 
To be honest I haven't even managed to get out of my pyjamas today, I am having the laziest of days and with the fridge full of leftovers, I won't even need to cook this evening either. Unfortunately, my body clock has not adjusted to holiday time yet and insists on waking me up at 6am, which wouldn't be a problem if I wasn't continually burning the midnight oil at the moment as well. I don't think that I have been in bed before midnight since I finished work last week, and the lack of rest is starting to get a hold of me. 
Tiredness affects people in all kinds of ways, some people get cranky and moody, others get dozy, but I get vague, really, really vague. People can have entire conversations with me and I won't hear a word of it because I am off with the pixies. I also do really stupid things like lose my glasses (which are perched on top of my head) or put things away and forget where I put them. I suppose that I am just getting a really good glimpse into my future, because from what I have heard, people in their old age do a lot of wacky stuff like that all of the time. However, I also get really annoyingly foggy and I can't focus on anything for very long, everything seems much harder than it actually is and I am really only good for one thing, movie marathons and TV bingeing.
Am I using my tiredness as an excuse to hit the couch hard for a couple of days? Probably, but I don't feel guilty about that, it is the holidays after all and I have well and truly earned my right to be lazy and disconnected for a while. The time to unplug and tune out has finally arrived, so I think I might watch something a little on the slanted side because my mind is already there after all!

Gimme a high five, a kiss on the cheek and a slap on the arse - work has officially ended! I have now happily navigated (and survived) the Christmas Staff Party, the work place Kris Kringle certificate exchange and the obligatory tipples, cheerful chatter and tears of goodbye that come with all end of year farewells and the much anticipated and fiercely coveted Summer holiday escape. All of my Christmas work events were thoroughly enjoyable, as one would expect when you work with a group of wonderful people, and I was sweetly touched by the outpouring of love and care that everyone in my school community shared with each other over this busy and genuinely exhausting time of the year.
The children (literally dead on their feet by the final stroke of the clock) showered me with much thanks, many hugs and a ridiculously generous cascade of gifts that were both greatly appreciated and overwhelmingly touching; highlighting all of the reasons that the slog is always worthwhile and that we do indeed change tiny minds everyday for the better. It would be more than fair to say that Christmas definitely came early for me. I don't even need to open another gift now, I have already been insanely spoilt and my ego has had a mighty good fluffing up from the many compliments and thanks that the children's parents (who did not hold back their gratitude or appreciations) happily gave to me. 
And so now I move onto more personal affairs, as today I brave the supermarket hordes to shop for my pre-Christmas get togethers and my family Christmas Day lunch. And even though I know that the supermarket is going to resemble a looting escapade during a zombie apocalypse, this is truly a labour of love now and I will undertake it with a lot of thought and loving devotion, because after all, it is Christmas time and therefore an excellent opportunity to spoil your loved ones and indulge in the finer things in life without feeling guilty. 
I have my menu planned, my shopping list written and I have purposely set aside Christmas Eve to prepare desserts and spend some time with Zoe and Seth swanning about the kitchen cooking up some delicious Christmas fare. I like to do all of the hard work and as much of the preparations before Christmas so that on the day I just have to load up the oven and grab a glass of bubbly. No-one should be slaving away in a kitchen on Christmas Day, that is just downright criminal. The load on the day has to be shared; the kids will dress the table (which Zoe has a turned into an art form), I will fill the oven and carve the roasted beasts, we will all do a little dusting and turning out of pre-prepared sweet treats, Seth will organise some appropriate and festive mood music and Craig, as he always does, will provide a jug of good gravy which he makes with the precision of a surgeon. And voila - we will have ourselves a merry little Christmas family gathering. Nothing more to do on the day but pop open the crackers and enjoy a relaxed meal together, which now that I have written about, am getting very excited for.
​Come on Christmas, I am ready for you to arrive!

I cannot deny that the fatigue of a rather long term has begun to set in over the last week. Since the beginning of December I have attended seven dinner events, two graduations, five after hours appointments, two breakfast dates, squeezed in a trip to the movies and not missed a day of work in the process. I have also finished my Christmas shopping, wrapped all of my presents, sent off my Christmas cards, put up the tree and decorations, planned my Christmas menu and volunteered to work for the Salvos and wrap presents on the Sunday before Christmas. I don't want to brag, but I am bloody well going to because I am slamming this Christmas so hard!
With only two days of work left, I am starting to feel the drag of this busy time of the year weighing down on me, which means that I need to shift my focus back to the positive things that have lead to me to this point in the year. I admit that I am ready to unwind a little, and I probably deserve to because I have been going at it like the clappers, and even though work will fall into blissful respite for a while, I still have quite a lot to do between now and the new year, which at this stage looks like a sweet lull from the busyness for me. However, no matter how you look at it, it is always easier to get  more done when you are on holidays and things don't ever feel like a chore when you are marching to the sound of your own drum and don't feel compelled to adhere the time constraints of paid employment. 
Overall, 2018 has been an absolutely massive year for me in every way, absolutely positive that is. I have incorporated so much new learning and self discovery time into my life this year, and for that reason I have a much fuller and richer life than I have ever had before. I have worked really hard to develop routines that have offered me a healthier lifestyle overall; one that embraces me in mind, body and spirit, and I have reaped a  lot of rewards for those efforts. I have also worked harder at my employment, taking on new skill sets and trying out new experiences on a level that I would never have had the confidence to do before, which has pushed me out of my comfort zone but made me grow as a person. And I also believe that I have worked really hard to cultivate meaningful relationships in my life this year by nurturing the positive and uplifting relationships that I am lucky enough to have by spending more time with people who stimulate, entertain, enchant, respect and interest me, which has made my family and social life incredibly enriching and deeply satisfying. 
On all fronts, I feel blessed. Blessed to have had the year that I have had, blessed to be able to spend Christmas time with my family and friends and blessed to have grown as much as I have this year. And even though I have no idea what kind of fuel is carrying me across the finish line of Term Four this year, I am deeply thankful for it and cannot wait to see what lies ahead for the rest of this wonderful season of celebration. 

Lots to consider at the moment.
The world is kind of whizzing past me in a wild flurry of activity and I am desperately trying to keep a hold on everything and remain positive, polite and jovial. Enjoy the ride Barb...remember you said you were going to enjoy the ride? says the voice in the back of my mind. And then the voice in the front of my mind says, what are you bloody well doing lollygagging about when Christmas is coming in twenty days? You aren't even close to ready for this!  
And I am constantly fighting between these two state of being at the moment, one is a state of blissful acceptance and joyful meandering and the other is a state of slight concern and mild panic. I say mild panic because I am not actually freaking out, but I do know that things are starting to mount up around me and that I am having to try my best to eliminate any clutter as it occurs so that it doesn't get too hectic. However, this need to eliminate the clutter as soon as possible has also caused another condition to occur; the 'too many balls in the air' condition that plagues everyone at some point around the silly season. Curses on the balls I say, I don't want balls to keep in the air, I want a blissful ride! 
Unfortunately, most of these said 'balls' have just arrived of their own volition and have not been of my own making at all, and this entire experience has swiftly reminded me that no matter how good my intentions may have been to remain all zen and joyful on the road to Christmas, that the rest of the world is not always sharing that sentiment with me and that poses a pretty big challenge to my plans. Every year I tell myself to slow down and enjoy the ride and every year it gets harder and harder to follow through with that idea because everyone else seems to be stressing out around me. 
It can be really hard to find enough down time at this time of the year as well, which means that I don't get nearly enough time on the yoga mat, the hiking tracks or the meditation pillow and that generally means that I am not really operating at my most tolerant levels either; and when you go and smash that together with every other pre-Christmas concern and 55 very tired foundation students a day...well, you know where this is going...not to a very zen like place that's for sure. 
However, as I said it is only slight concern and mild panic at this point, certainly nothing that I cannot manage and considering some of the side balls that I have had tossed at me over the last week, I think that I am actually doing okay. Got a whole new mantra going and everything:
Enjoy the ride Barb...enjoy the ride!

In life we are presented with a never ending stream of opportunities. Opportunities to meet new people and experience new things, opportunities to evolve and unfold as a person and opportunities to change your way of life or your way of thinking. These opportunities come to us every single day, and sometimes we don't even recognise them for what they are because we are too busy or distracted to see what we are being presented with. 
This time of the year in particular is so consuming; consuming of our time, our money and often our patience as well as we scramble toward Christmas, hanging all of our hopes on the day that our holidays begin or that special day when we get to celebrate with our family and friends. We become so fixated on arriving at our destination (which isn't happening for another month yet mind you) that we completely forget to look around and embrace any new opportunities that may be arriving, and we certainly don't make the most out of everyday of the festive season along the way. This happens every year, and I write about it every year because I see it happening to people all around me every year. For some reason we just don't allow ourselves to enjoy things completely in the lead up to Christmas and I am beginning to think that we have all been programmed to do this, and it really has to stop. 
Now don't get me wrong, I do really enjoy Christmas, I am not Scrooge for goodness sake! However, I do feel like people lose focus of what is important at this time of the year and hold themselves to ransom, often sacrificing huge amounts of money, time and energy which they invest into just one day of the year. A day that comes and goes without nearly as much fuss required as we feel compelled to throw at it in my opinion. What about the next 30 days leading up to Christmas? Don't we deserve to enjoy the ride, the countdown and the anticipation with a bit of joy as well? Damn straight we do! We totally need to stop and smell the flowers along the way, indulge in the lead up to the day and seize any new opportunities along the way to Christmas day, but often we just don't. 
The pressure to deliver a so called 'perfect' Christmas quite frankly has balls on it! The best Christmas's that I have ever had were really quiet events spent with my nearest and dearest in total relaxation. I cannot tell you how much stress I have put myself under for Christmas events in the past, and for what? I've spent hours stressing about whether people would be happy with their gifts or not and then barely received a thank you when the gifts were actually opened. I have spent hours slaving away in the kitchen trying to cook for a tribe of people and then had people only point out what they didn't like about the meal when it was over. I can even recall Christmas' where my own family have made me feel completely unwelcomed at Christmas events, and it honestly made me realise that none of it is worth it. 
The build up, the expectation to deliver, the need to perform, blah! Who needs all that? That is the complete opposite of what Christmas is about in my mind, and I think that so many people are getting it all wrong. Why not take some pressure off yourself this year and seize an opportunity to look around at what is really going on. Be honest with yourself, are you really embodying the Christmas spirit or are you just ticking off some stupid 'to do' list that you feel compelled to complete that has nothing to do with love or generosity or kindness, or bloody Christmas spirit for that matter!
Let's get this into perspective. In a nutshell, gifts at Christmas are a bonus, and should never be an expectation unless you are under 10. Kids get to expect Christmas gifts, adults need to be happy with whatever they bloody well get and should not sook or bitch about it because  it's petty and it's mean to look any gift horse in the mouth, especially if you have enough money to buy yourself whatever you want anyway, which is often the case with the biggest whiners. Keep gifts small and thoughtful and never let yourself get frazzled when selecting gifts for people, remember that it is the thought that counts and anyone that thinks otherwise is an asshole! 
The Christmas food on the day should be special but also simple and it should never be too labour intensive because no-one wants to be chained to the kitchen on Christmas day, it's cruel. And people please, think about your food quantities and don't over do it. Creating days of leftovers is hardly 'good will' toward the planet, it is Christmas dinner, not a 'feed the world' campaign and therefore the amount of food doesn't need to increase. Remember that sometimes less is more, and a delicious simple meal with a couple of special additions always works best in my opinion, so don't freak yourself trying to make a 10 course extravaganza, it's not worth the hassell. 
Decorating before Christmas should be a joyous thing to indulge in, something that the whole family can do together which will also take the pressure off one person being responsible for 'doing' the tree and making things festive. Small accents are enough, you don't need to go all 'flashing lights on the house' crazy to feel like you're bringing the Christmas spirit into your home. Effective natural decorations and Christmas accents can be as basic as a few sprigs of evergreen and a couple of pinecones from outside; so damn simple and also free!
So, how are you going to spend your time in the lead up to Christmas this year? Freaking out or chilling out? Seizing and embracing new opportunities or completely oblivious to anything else because you've got your Christmas 'to do' list to perform and come hell or high water you're gonna get it done? Well, essentially the choice is your own, but I know that I'm not gonna sweating the small stuff this year, that's for sure. I'm on the lookout for fun, frivolity and opportunities to enjoy every day leading up Christmas day and every day after that as well!

Men's health is an extremely neglected issue, especially in countries like Australia where the term 'Man Up' or 'Don't be a Pussy' are the staple when it comes to male wellbeing. However, the truth is that the stoic, strong and silent male stereotype that Aussie males have happily hung their hats upon for decades has actually been incredibly damning for men.
Australia now has an alarmingly high suicide rate, and 75% of those suicides are men between the ages 15-44, which means that more men die of suicide every year than from road accidents. Suicide has now become the 10th highest cause of death among men, which means that it is an issue that we can no longer afford to ignore. Just today, 6 Australia men will take their own lives, and we desperately need to get to the bottom of what is going on and why this is happening. 
The men that are taking their own lives come from all walks of life, they live in rural areas and cities, they are young and old and they have diverse employment, socio-economic statuses and cultural backgrounds, but they do have one thing in common, and that is the inability to reach out and share their troubles with others. Turns out that the strong male stereotype is so well ingrained that most men say that they are concerned or even afraid to show their true feelings, their worries, their anxieties and their burdens with others, even their closest family members and friends. This inability to share tends to push vulnerable men into drug and alcohol abuse, gambling addictions or other unhealthy outlets to try and cope with their emotions. 
Essentially we have as a culture, disempowered our men to talk about themselves and their problems. Men are struggling to allow themselves to be vulnerable for fear of being singled out as weak; the pull to be an 'Aussie bloke' who can shoulder any responsibility has overridden men's ability to adopt introspection and let their guard down, and the results of this are just catastrophic.
So what can we do about it? First and foremostly, we have to acknowledge that what we are doing isn't working and that we need to make some serious changes to the way that we deal with men and their health and wellbeing issues. Organisation like Gotcha4Life and Movember are supporting programs directed specifically at men and agree that the approach needs to be different. Empowering and encouraging men to have deeper conversations about what is going on with them when they experience a crisis in their lives is the best place to start. We must make room for men to be in touch with the human parts of themselves, which means that they need the space to share, cry, mourn and feel weak from time to time without the fear of negative judgement.
We need to stop telling blokes to harden up or man up and we need to be better listeners and show support and understanding. We need to educate ourselves about men and their unique set of challenges and the heavy unspoken expectations that are placed upon them from an early age. These traditions of expectation have become so ingrained in Australian culture that it is going to take time to loosen the shackles of those constraints for men, but we have to start somewhere because male suicide is on the rise not the decline in Australia. 
So start right away, tell the men in your life how much they mean to you and take more time to just sit and talk with them when you can. Allow time for them to bond with other men recreationally, and encourage them to spend time alone with other men so that they can learn to open up and share their thoughts and feelings in 'safe mate' circle of friends. Support and normalise emotional releases and remember that it is all of our responsibilities to make men feel valued, heard and supported so that they can face the challenges of their lives with dignity. Help men to understand that it is not only okay to feel weak, it is absolutely necessary sometimes, and that being an emotionless robot isn't of service to anyone.
It is time for us all to wave goodbye to the stoic Aussie male stereotype that we have all been conditioned to accept and expect for generations, because we know that we can all do a shitload better than that for our men. And I implore all men to reach out and share, because we are all here and ready to hear you and support you, and never forget that it's all gonna be okay, help is never too far away and it's totally okay to seek it out if you should need it. 

I believe that the death penalty is an archaic and barbaric form of justice, in fact I do not believe that it is really a form of justice at all, it is a reaction to an act of violence with violence, and I think that it should be abolished worldwide. I ask you, how on earth can we ever achieve justice through more acts of injustice? 
I cannot understand it and I will never support it, for me the taking of any life, no matter how wretched that soul may be, goes against every fibre of my being and everything that I believe in. In a day and age where there are options for proper care and rehabilitation through correct practice and procedure, I think that we are far better equipped to deal with the ugliness of social misconduct than we have ever been before. Surely we can boast that we have evolved into a more civilised and humane culture that can bolster better consequences for the mentally unwell than just executing them?
In a recent episode of the television program Kidding, the main character meets the son of his penpal who just happens to be an inmate on death row. Through contact with this penpal we learn the truth about the lethal injection that is given to death row prisoners to euthanize them, and it really got me thinking about how deeply barbaric and horrific it would be to die in that way.
The so called 'painless' execution method is actually very far from painless and consists of a series of three lethal injections. The first of the three injections is an anesthetic called sodium thiopental, which is a fast acting barbiturate that depresses the activity of the central nervous system. This initial shot doesn't serve as a painkiller that numbs pain nerves, but instead it rapidly puts a person into a state of unconsciousness that's theoretically deep enough to make pain undetectable (note the word theoretically there). The assumption is that the drug will last long enough for the other two injections to be administered, but no-one alive has been able to substantiate that theory, so it's a grey area for sure. 
The second injection is pancuronium bromide which causes complete muscle paralysis, so even if the person being executed was in pain, they wouldn't be able to cry out or let anyone know that they were; and the injection also causes the respiratory system to go into arrest because the muscle of the diaphragm (the muscle that pulls air into the lungs) stops working, so odds are it hurts like a bitch. 
The last dosage to be administered is potassium chloride, which floods the heart with charged particles that interrupt its electrical signaling and stop it from beating. According to a study in the Journal of Forensic Science, the average length of time from the first injection to death is 8.4 minutes. Try and get your head around that, 8.4 minutes of possible pain and discomfort, maybe a lot longer, before you eventually die. It's a chilling thought, and not something that invokes a painless drifting off, as one may have imagined about lethal injection previously. It may be more humane than electrocution or a cyanide gas chamber, but let's not kid ourselves here, this is still a completely barbaric practice that needs to be abolished. 
And to top it all off, there are no real health professionals present when lethal injection procedures are administered because doctors and nurses are banned by their professional organisations from participating in executions since it goes against the moral code of health care professionals to be involved in such procedures. Surely that made you raise an eyebrow? 
And even though many countries have abolished the use of the death penalty, there are still 54 countries around the world that still have laws that sanction the use of capital punishment, and in some of those countries, the lethal injection would actually look like a good option considering the fact that they still use hanging, shooting, torture, flogging, firing squads and even stoning as a means of execution which is sometimes conducted publicly. I seriously shudder at the thought. 
An eye for an eye and the world goes blind, and I firmly believe that that is true. We cannot fight fire with fire and expect to survive the inferno ourselves, a life is a life and when others make poor choices we cannot simply put out their light, it is wrong and it is immoral. Anyone that supports the taking of a life for a life really needs to take a good hard look at what is motivating all of that hate in the first place, because in my opinion, it isn't natural to want to destroy your own kind. 

Every now and then someone will call me out on a review that I have done on a movie or a blog post that I have made; and if you are going to put your opinions on the internet, then you have expect that people are going to give their opinions back to you as well.  Total strangers, friends and even family members will point out how they didn't like what I wrote on my blog or point out how wrong I was about a certain movie that was at least one Chilli Pepper hotter or 3 Chilli Peppers colder than I had implied that it was, and I think that a lot them really enjoy sharing their own verdict or opinion on a topic that I have raised or a review that I have posted.
I am not sure whether people are hoping that I will kick off in response to their adverse reactions to my writings, but I can say with complete honesty that I don't mind at all if you disagree with my opinions. You do not have to agree with me, it would be completely weird if you did. I do not claim to be 'the God of all movie knowledge', I am not even close to being an expert in cinema, I am just a movie enthusiast that likes to write, and that is where my expertise ends. Sure I have seen a lot of movies, but there are still millions of movies that I haven't seen, and as for my opinions, well they're just that, opinions not facts or truths to be adopted and set into action, they are merely my opinions, nothing more and nothing less than that. 
Is it actually really great to hear that people don't agree with me. I love to hear about other people's experiences of the movies that they have seen, and that is one of the things that is so damn terrific about cinema, it is completely subjective. Like any expression of art, one person's trash is another person's treasure, and cinema is no different from that in any way. We may agree sometimes, never, seldom or often, it matters not to me one way or another. Make your own mind up about the movies that I review, see them for yourself, be discerning and be disagreeable, I welcome all opinions and you never have to agree with me. 
Cinematic experiences are unique and completely individual to everyone. They can be affected by your mood, your interest level in the subject, your wellbeing, your personal experiences, your tolerance levels and even your level of alertness when you enter a cinema. There are millions of factors at play when a person decides to squat for a couple of hours to watch a film, and I wouldn't dare to assume that my experiences would be in sync with anyone elses for even half of that time. 
Nope, I don't mind if you don't agree with me. In fact, I am ecstatic to hear the opinions of other cinephiles, it is a comfort to know that other people feel as passionately about their movie experiences as I do. I would never stifle  your disagreement of my comments, I welcome them and appreciate every one of my loyal readers opinions, even when they are completely opposed to mine. Please do keep up all of the comments and the conversations about movies with me, I am always happy to receive feedback and those of you that know me well, know that I will never get enough cinema related chatter in my life, so please do share your thoughts with me. 

THE SKIN I LIVE IN
Release Date: 2011
Rating: MA 15+
Running Time: 120 mins 
A Spanish psychological thriller, written and directed by Pedro Almodóvar.  Almodóvar has described the film as "a horror story without screams or frights" which is an accurate description. Although The Skin I Live In can't really be regarded as horror, there are certainly plenty of horrific goings on that will seriously mess with your head. 
A regarded plastic surgeon that is plagued by misfortune, creates a wonderful new type of skin that is impervious to damage. His human guinea pig and private obsession is a woman named Vera, a mysterious beauty that resides as a prisoner in his house. 
Antonio Banderas does a brilliant job of portraying the Dr. Frankenstein like surgeon Ledgard, and Elena Anaya is painfully beautiful as his subject, Vera. This movie has all of the elements of a great psychological thriller; devious plot twists, intensely interesting and esoteric characters and plenty of back story. However, because it crosses so many lines it also induces disgust and revulsion, albeit in the most stylish fashion, and for that reason it will not be to everyone's liking. If you can handle the kink levels turned up to high pitch, then you should enjoy the ride. 
FINAL SAY: I breathe. I breathe. I breathe. 
3 Chilli Peppers ​

In our household, no topic is off the table when it comes to family discussions around the dinner table. This open dialogue between myself, my husband and our children has led to many interesting, sometimes awkward and often lengthy and involved banters over the years, and even though many people have raised an eyebrow in regards to how open we are about all topics in our home, I have been vigilant about instilling the values of open conversation and honesty when it comes to family exchanges. 
Because of this open dialogue around the dinner table, we have had what many people would call 'difficult' conversations with our children as they have discovered the truths and at times the ugly realities about the world, but we pride ourselves for never lying to them or hiding an unpleasant truth from them, and they have both turned out to be pretty well rounded and open minded individuals as a result of this.
​Both of my children knew the truth about their body parts, how lives are created and that some people are 'not quite right in the head' well before they even arrived at primary school. And before they left primary school they also knew about war, religion, genocide, enlightenment, rape, cults, incest, racism, paedophilia, discrimination, poverty, mental illness, hate crimes and all forms of artistic, spiritual and sexual expression. Neither of them have become unbalanced by any of this information, and neither of them now struggle to understand the complexities of the world. The truth about the world did not fuck them up or steal their innocence and they both had really normal happy childhoods. In fact, growing up they didn't have nearly as many troubles as their peers when it came to managing social situations or complicated issues and have always had a strong sense of social justice and ethical behaviour as a result of their developed global understanding. 
I worked hard to cultivate a mindset in my children 'that nothing is too big to tell, or too awkward to ask about.' And yes, it has lead to some 'hot' discussion and even some disagreements over the years (because with an open forum people will tend to debate and defend their formed opinions) but it has also meant that my children are always willing to talk to me, really talk to me. If something is going on they will always tell us about it and if something is happened that they don't understand or need clarification about, they will ask. And the conversation is still very lively around our dinner table and although we sometimes hit the hard topics, generally we share many relaxed and casual meals where the order of the day is much laughter and silliness. 
I am in no way saying that open-conversation is going to fly smoothly at everyone's dinner table, but having room for opinion and the comfort to ask questions is certainly not a bad thing to generate in any family. Being able to talk about anything, even the really tough stuff has certainly brought us closer together as a family and my kids have always been grateful for the honesty that they have received from us whilst they were in their formative years.
​I have never been able to think of a good reason to hide things from my children or to lie to them and I have never wanted to cultivate a relationship with my children that was steeped in deception or mistrust. I often wonder when I hear adults say that their children aren't ready to hear the truths about the world if it is just because they as adults aren't ready to deal with all of the ugliness themselves. All that I know for sure from my own experiences, is that nurturing a home where secrets are supported and lies necessitated will only lead to bitter resentments, disappointments and painful truths later on in life, and we all want a lot less of that for our children in the long run. 

No matter how much a well meaning parent or caring mentor may try to arm you with the goods to make the best out of the life that you have been given, there are some things that you just have to learn and find out for yourself. No amount of good advise or pep talking can ever provide you with the smarts that you will get from actually finding something out for yourself through sheer effort, life experience, perseverance and/ or a good splash of stupidity. 
​I have never met anyone that has been able to give me the ability to be strong or to be happy. I have met people that have inspired me to be stronger and happier, but the real work on those fronts comes from within. Strength can only be gained by facing life's adversities and overcoming fears. The strongest people that I know are the ones who have fallen the most in their lifetimes, and that strength is learned and cultivated over time. Everyone's strength and what they derive it from is unique, it is not a torch that can passed along to another. Strength cannot be taught, only demonstrated, and the same goes for happiness.
Everyone must learn to be happy, it isn't something that you can buy or earn, its far more esoteric than that. It is something that you either have or you don't have, it is a state of mind and therefore being truly happy is something that you must learn to do on your own. It is something that you have to choose, even in the face of great adversity, and no one else can give you the minerals to do that. Being truly happy, in spite of life's adversities or suffering is a real skill, and it's one that you have to master yourself. 
However, strength and happiness are not the only things that you must learn to master alone, let's not forget two of the toughest things that you will have to learn in this life, how to forgive and how to love. The saying 'the heart wants what the heart wants' certainly has some truth to it. You cannot make your heart feel what it doesn't want to feel, and learning to love others and yourself unconditionally is an exceptionally difficult challenge and something that people spend many lifetimes trying to learn to do well. Learning to love and willingly give over of yourself without restriction is not easy, and again like all things that you cannot learn from someone else, from a book or just purchase online; it is unique, emotional and challenging to master. 
I think that the art of forgiveness may well be the most difficult of all things that you will have to learn on your own. Being hurt is part of life and it is natural to have your feelings crushed or your hopes dashed by difficult people or even worse, the people that you care about or love the most. But learning that forgiveness can set you free and release you from potential hard-heartedness is something that you simply have to learn to do on your own. No-one can make you forgive another, or tell you to forgive another, you must do it yourself, when you are ready, and where and when that forgiveness happens is yours alone to determine. 
There is no manual for the toughest lessons, and there is no way to give a person true strength or happiness, or the ability to love and forgive. The best that anyone can ever do to instill these qualities in another is to work hard to master them themselves, so that they can at least be a good role model. However in saying that, I do believe that these skills are lifelong endeavours and certainly not something that you can master easily or quickly, and to imply that they are easily managed would be both flippant and ridiculous.
Everyone knows that all of the best fruit on the 'tree of life' is hanging out on the furthest limbs, it is tricky to reach and even harder to pluck, but it is there to be seen nonetheless. There is nothing wrong with forging forward, staying the course and continuing to learn with an open mind and a willingness to go the hard yards alone; and even if you don't ever fully learn to master the hardest lessons that you are expected to manage on your own, you won't ever regret trying. 

And just like that, two weeks of holiday bliss has passed me by again. This time I got to do all of the things that I had set out to do at the beginning of the break. I read a novel, binge watched entire an TV series and saw some terrific movies, painted at the easel, went for a walk everyday, slept in, caught up with a some friends, chilled out with my kids, did yoga and meditation everyday, drank some good whiskey, replanted by garden beds and vegetable patch and just breathed in all of the fabulousness that a fortnight of respite can offer. For the first time ever, I did not run around, I did not make an extensive to do list, I did not chase anyone for a catch up; in fact I barely even left Enfield unless I absolutely had to, and it was one of the most peaceful breaks that I have enjoyed in some time. Above all else, I rested and I rebooted myself for the final and undoubtedly busiest term of the year which is probably the most important thing to do at this stage of the year. 
Finding grace and calm during the busier times of the year is always a challenge, so setting yourself up correctly at the launch pad is always a very wise choice. In 2007, Randy Pausch (a professor from Carnegie Mellon University in Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania who had terminal cancer) made a final lecture, entitled Last Lecture, about the most important lessons that he had learned in his life. The lecture became an internet sensation, inspiring millions of people around the globe and spawned an international best-selling book that would be interpreted into 35 languages. In his lecture Randy eloquently says, among many other pearls of wisdom,  "we cannot change the cards that we are dealt, just how we play the hand."
The most resilient and impressive leaders of our time have used this philosophy to stay the the course and to show courage in the face of adversity. The people that use the most challenging times of their lives as valuable teaching moments (for themselves or others) are the wisest and strongest people. And the bottom line is, that in the struggle, there is real growth. And even though I would love to swan around in downward facing dog and wander about the Enfield forest every other afternoon, that is not the only way that my soul is going to get fed. By avoiding all contact, challenge and confrontation I am not really stretching my boundaries as a person and I am not really fulfilling my potential to make a difference. The struggle is important, the struggle is valuable and the struggle is necessary. 
So raise a glass to challenge, welcome some adversity into your life. Don't let it make you furious, let it keep you curious. Like I said in my previous writings, it's all about turning straw into gold and finding the joy in all states of being. Yes, there is a time for rest and relaxation, but there is also a time for action and progress and I recognise that the time for me to pick up my tools and continue with the work at hand has arrived, and I feel like I am ready and recharged for the task ahead. This time, I welcome the return.

One of the biggest obstacles that I have faced in my Transcendental Meditation (TM) practises so far has been the relinquishing of my power to control everything, to accept and just let go. Learning to accept all of the aspects of my life and work from a place of non-judgement is not as easy as it may seem and it does require a certain shedding of old habits to make room for new pathways and states of being to generate.
The further that I delved into the inner workings of my own mind (a labyrinth of unchartered territory exists in there I can assure you), the more aware that I am becoming of the layers of hidden anger and hurt that I have shoved down over the years. This anger has manifested itself in so many ways in my life in the past. It has been a merciless beast that has stood in the path of my own happiness, manifesting itself in unpleasant ways through my fear, boredom, ill-will, judgement and criticism. TM is forcing me to challenge those old ways and thought patterns, and it is creating a space for me to 'turn straw into gold.' 
Just like the maiden that is locked in a room and forced to spin straw into gold in the fairytale Rumpelstiltskin, we too have the ability to use our problems and old default modes to discover a true inner wisdom, peace and love. In his book A Path With Heart, Jack Kornfield discusses this exact topic and the ways in which we can overcome these apparent obstacles to uncover a better and higher way of thinking.
It is perfectly normal to have and feel all of these emotions, even the most adept yogis and zen masters in the world still have a myriad of these emotions, they don't just cease to exist because you have found your enlightenment. All emotional states are an integral part of living and they are vital to our growth and development as a whole being. It is not the emotion itself that even matters, it is the way in which we approach these thoughts and feelings that determines how much energy we are willing to invest in them and whether we view them as either straw or gold. 
Think of of it in terms of this ancient and extremely wise tale about a poisoned tree. On discovering the poisoned tree, some people immediately saw it as a threat and exclaimed that it should be cut down at once and destroyed. 'Burn it as well', they demanded, 'so that no more seeds can ever grow again and no-one will ever eat the fruit of the poisoned tree'. This reaction resembles our initial response to the difficulties that arise in our lives, when we encounter aggression, compulsion, greed, or fear, when faced with stress, loss, conflict, depression or sorrow in ourselves or others, our initial response is to avoid, destroy and remove the threat. 
Other people, who may have journeyed further along in life will discover the poisoned tree and have no aversion to it at all. They know you must remain open to all things in this life. They will say, 'do not cut this tree down. Instead let's have compassion for the tree'. They will build a fence around the tree so that it may keep its life and so that others may not be poisoned by it. This approach shows a profound shift of relationship from judgement and fear to compassion. 
And then there is a third type of person, who has travelled even further in life and has much vision and thought, and when they see the same poisoned tree they will exclaim 'Oh! A poisoned tree, perfect! Just what I was looking for'. This individual will pick the poisoned fruit off the tree and investigate its properties, mix it with a bunch of other ingredients and then use the poison as a great medicine to heal the sick and transform the ills of the world. Through respect, intelligence and an understanding that even from great adversity comes wonderful opportunity, this person will find value even in the most difficult of circumstances. This last person has mastered the art of making straw into gold, and we all have the opportunity to become that person by considering the way in which we meet our disappointments, obstacles, challenges and heartaches. 
Through deepening my ability to listen to my inner self (mind, body and spirit), I am becoming more and more aware of my own negative reactions and feelings, as well as my positive ones. I am slowly learning that no state is any more or less valuable than any other, and that all aspects of life and living are valuable and precious. I am trying to learn the art of making straw into gold, and although it is going to take me a long time to learn to do that really well, I am learning none-the-less; which means that I am on a path of self discovery.
That fact alone, is much more than I could have ever hoped TM would offer to me. I have been very fortunate to be able to have the time to embark on this experiment of the soul and it is pretty safe to say that I will be continuing my practises. At this point I would also happily recommend a regular meditation practice (of any type, not just TM)  to everyone,  because we all need to get a little better at making straw into gold and nurturing ourselves. 

One thing that I sure do love about having some extra recreational time in my life is being able to curl up on the couch with a coffee in one hand and a fabulous novel in the other and just read for hours without interruption. Reading is such a pleasurable activity and it is something that so often gets pushed to the wayside for me when I get really busy and it is something that I definitely look forward to indulging when time allows. I try hard to read at least one book and one entire magazine every month (Empire is my preferred choice) and if I don't read at least 10 books over the year, then I feel like I have failed terribly on the reading front. 
These days more and more people are reaching for an e-book for convenience and ease when it comes to their reading needs, but there are actually some extraordinary and scientific reasons to pick up a 'real' book and lose yourself, and a lot of those reasons are linked to health and wellbeing.  
Firstly, and probably foremost, reading increases your intelligence. Remember Dr Seuss' old chestnut? - "the more that you read, the more things you will know. The more that you learn, the more places you'll go."  Well, there is quite a lot of evidence to support that statement and according to a paper from the University of California, people that are exposed to higher amounts of vocabulary through literature and conversation have higher academic performance and higher IQ's in general.
Reading a 'real' book over a 'screen' book will also increase your reading speed by as much as 20-30% and a real book has been proven to engage memory more significantly than a screen book can because the physical act of turning a page offers your brain a tactile reference to the context which helps you to recall the information with more accuracy in the future. So if it's a reference or study book that you are reading then you should always opt for the real version over the e-book. 
Reading works for your brain in the same way that jogging works for your cardiovascular system, and regular reading improves your brain's memory function, which helps to keep your mind sharper and your processing abilities honed. In turn, that reduces your chances of having lowered mental function and cognition as you get older. And it is now a well known fact that people that read, play chess and complete puzzles are up to 2.5 times less likely to get Alzheimer's disease than people who don't, which proves that reading is actually vital to maintaining excellent mental functions.
Reading has also been scientifically proven to improve empathy and an understanding of other people's mental states. Turns out that every time that you get 'lost' in a novel, that you are actually building up the skills in your brain that allow you to understand complex social relationships and the characteristics of human societies. Which basically means that reading makes you more emotionally intelligent in the long run. 
On top of all that, reading also helps to reduce stress levels by up to 68% and reading before retiring in the evening has been proven to offer a more restful and sound sleep, but again it needs to be 'real' book and not a screen novel that you are reading, because looking at a screen before you go to sleep has the opposite effect. 
If all of that hasn't convinced you that you need to read more often, than I don't know what will. Seriously, go and get a book and get reading, it is so good for you! And if you don't know what to read, well of course I have you covered there as well!
Here is a list of 20 of my all time favourite books (in no particular order) for you to get lost in if you need a good place to start:

1. The Harry Potter Series by J.K. Rowling (my fave book series of all time)
2. Life of Pi by Yann Martel
3. Ready Player One by Ernest Cline
4. Let the Right One In by John Ajvide Lindqvist
5. Going Bovine by Libba Bray
6. I Am Legend by Richard Matheson
7. The Night Circus by Erin Morgenstern
8. The Solitaire Mystery by Jostein Gaarder
9. The Industry of Souls by Martin Booth
10. Geek Love by Katherine Dunn
11. Big Brother by Lionel Shriver 
12. The Curious Incident of the Dog in the Night-time by Mark Haddon
13. Interview With the Vampire by Anne Rice
14. Crank by Ellen Hopkins
15. Jonathan Strange and Mr Norrell by Susanna Clarke
16. The Bartimaeus Trilogy by Jonathan Stroud
17. Like Water for Chocolate by Laura Esquivel 
18. Metamorphosis by Franz Kafka
19. Gods Behaving Badly by Marie Phillips 
20. The Lord of the Rings Trilogy by J.R.R Tolkien

I did something this week that I have never done before in my life, I asked to speak to a manager about poor customer service. Being a person who used to work in the service industry myself, I think that I am pretty lenient when it comes to customer service. I understand that no-one can be at their best 100% of the time and I am usually reasonably accommodating to that fact. I normally would never request to speak a store manager to complain or 'dob' in a worker for their poor service, but on Friday at a well known Australian supermarket chain, I did. And I did it because of the disgraceful service that I received from not one, but two of their staff. 
Let me tell you exactly what occurred. I was in the fresh produce section and realised that there were no produce plastic bags on the rolls in the area that I was in, none in that entire row actually, and I stopped a young female staff member as she was scooting past me and asked -'excuse me, there are no plastic bags in this aisle, could I please get some more?' She did not speak to me, but held out a hand and pointed to another staff member at the other end of the isle, which I found extremely rude for a start. Then when I started to approach the other staff member that she had directed me towards, she quickly wheeled her cart out the back and was gone. Hmmmmm....okay, clearly not the best customer service day at this supermarket, but I just laughed and turned to Seth and commented to him that it was a 'not my job - not my problem' situation and went on with my shopping. 
That was when I overheard the young female staff member that I had first approached at the end of another produce isle, casually bitching to a fellow staff member about how rude all of the customers were today and how she was tired of our surly behaviour. They were both laughing and agreeing and then the first female walked away and the one that she was moaning to came to my end of the produce section. I'm not going to lie here, I was actually pretty annoyed at this stage and I approached the new female staff member and calmly said 'Hello, I was wondering if we could get some plastic bags on the rolls down this isle because there aren't any. I did already ask the young lady that was busy bitching to you down the other end about how surly the customers are today, but she didn't even have the respect to speak to me.'
At first the girl looked shocked, she shifted from foot to foot and then she laughed and said 'we don't have any more bags,' and then she turned her back to me and went on with stacking the fruit. I went on to say, 'you are joking, are you seriously trying to tell me that there aren't any replacement produce bags in this supermarket?' and she then replied to me in a very condescending tone.... now wait for it because this was the when the pin popped out of my grenade, 'there's some in other isles you know, just go and get one from the other end of the produce section.' And that was it, I was just absolutely livid...I felt really really angry, I was triggered, it was like a bomb went off in me. For some reason this simple chain of events had really got me cross, cross enough to go to another staff member and ask to speak to a manager. 
I would like to point out that in spite of me feeling exceptionally cross, I did not yell and I did not abuse anyone, I just calmly told the manager what had happened, and I stated that the young ladies had made me feel extremely unwelcome in the store and that the customer service standards were absolutely appalling. And get this, while I was telling the manager my story, the two young ladies that had just made me feel like crap were standing together in the produce section eyeballing me, whispering behind their hands and giggling, which I also pointed out to the manager in the hope that they would get a decent arse kicking for being so flippant and rude. 
Easily the worst customer service that I have ever had in my life - EVER! And after speaking to the manager who just seemed as ill equipped and lost as his dreadful produce girls, I went home and got onto the supermarket website and made another formal complaint. I was on a roll! And like I said, I would normally just let things go, but I have never felt so mistreated in a shopping environment in my entire life, and considering the fact that I didn't even shout, demand or abuse anyone, then the treatment that I got was totally uncalled for as well. 
I am hoping that this is just an isolated incident and that it isn't an illustration of how low customer service standards have fallen recently, because if I had to put up with that shit every time that I went out shopping, then I would just start to shop online. Talk about ruining a person's zen on a Friday afternoon, it was not a nice start to my weekend at all!

In life we are constantly faced with a series of choices and decisions. Some of those choices are simplistic and really don't require any deep thinking on our behalf, they are the no-brainer choices that we make everyday on autopilot, mundane things like 'what will I have for breakfast today, toast or cereal?' And other times the decisions that lay ahead of us are profoundly life altering, and making a choice one way or another can seriously alter the way that our lives will play out. 
There is nothing that any of us can do to avoid facing the fork in the road from time to time. Sometimes we feel ready to make changes and we are happy to discover a crossroad up ahead, and then other times we feel completely ill equipped to choose any of the roads that we are presented with; but the roads rise up to meet us nonetheless and in turn force us to decide our fate.
With decision making (like all choices) there are consequences, and we all want to avoid any bad ones as much as we can and carry our choices with us for the long haul. We all need to be able to live with our decisions, but sometimes things are not as clear cut as we would like them to be and we can find ourselves tossing around in bed at night, anguishing over the 'what ifs' and 'why did I's' that life sometimes dishes out to us. 
So, how do you live with the bad choices that you've made? How do you move on from a poor decision or a dreadful consequence? Well, you just do really, because you have to. It's either that or let it eat away at you until you are just a big ball of anxiety and self loathing and no-one wants to be either of those things. But living with the decisions that you make, good or bad, is certainly easier said than done, and I am yet to meet anyone that doesn't have any regrets about some of the choices that they have made in their past.
And I guess that there is something seriously comforting in that knowledge; that all of us do have regrets and that all of us do make mistakes from time to time. And just knowing that it is okay to do stupid things, say stupid things and make horrific mistakes from time to  time and then put them behind us and move on with our lives is good stuff to know. It's one thing that we all have in common, and in accepting our flaws, faults and mistakes, we can better accept the flaws, faults and mistakes of others as well. It's all part of the process of finding the whole self and getting a little better at 'life-ing.'
However, that being said, I do believe that one should always try to avoid making horrific choices as often as possible as well. Just because we all make mistakes doesn't mean that we should all throw caution to the wind making decisions without thought or in disregard to all consequence. Quite the opposite really, I believe that all choices should be made mindfully and purposefully; with longevity, community and humility always being at the forefront of any choice. An extra day of pondering can allow a lifetime of regret to become a lifetime of happiness, and that is certainly something to consider.
I once read that you should never make decisions when you're angry or elated because neither are sustainable feelings, and I do think that most of the bad choices that I have made in my life were generally during either my angry or elated moments. So I think that there is definitely some sound advice to be found in that little slice of wisdom, and any advice that can leads us to a guilt free, calm and settled lifestyle is good advice in my eyes.
​Even though there is no magic formula when it comes to the best life choices, just remember to always sleep on any big decisions and never allow yourself to feel rushed or pressed to make a big life decision. As for the little stuff, let that shit go, if it isn't going to matter in six months from now, then it isn't worth losing sleep over, let it slide off you like water off a duck's back. And anything that happened more than six months ago is well and truly over, so make peace with your mistakes, own them, learn from them and move on knowing that you just got a little bit better. 

What the hell is Transcendental Meditation (TM) and what is the deal with all of the buzz surrounding it? Every famous person and their dog seems to be investing in the power of Transcendental Meditation, claiming that it is a total game changer that is easy to do and simple to access. I have been spending a bit of my free time looking into the rising phenomenon of TM and trying to work out what it is actually all about and whether or not it is just another zen-based sham that hooks in unsuspecting people that are just looking to get a little more well-being into their lives.
From what I can understand, TM dates all the way back to the Vedic traditions of India, however the primary person responsible for bringing it to Western cultures during the 1960's and 1970's was Maharishi Mahesh yogi. He taught his methods to various people who then became his disciples, spreading out and teaching his TM methods to millions of people around the globe. Maharishi Mahesh yogi himself has also taught many celebrities the art of TM, including the Beatles way back in the 60's, which would explain the Sergeant Pepper phase of The Beatles musical career. 
The meditation practice itself apparently involves the use of a simple and natural technique that requires the repetition of a mantra for 15-20 minutes twice a day whilst sitting with your eyes closed. Sounds pretty simple right? TM also vehemently claims that it is NOT religion or a philosophy of any sort, just a new way of engaging and calming the mind.
It is reported to be one of the most widely practised forms of meditation today as well as the most researched form of meditation being used. Users swear by its life changing benefits and famous people are seriously jumping on board the TM bandwagon like bees swarming around a honey pot. Some famous people are extremely vocal about their appreciation of the practice and are constantly online tooting and tweeting about TM's miraculous benefits. Celebs like Ellen Degeneres, Hugh Jackman, Cameron Diaz, Jerry Seinfeld, Paul McCartney, Russell Brand, Katy Perry are all huge advocators, and director David Lynch has even opened his own foundations to support the use of this ancient Vedic practise.
The transcendental meditation process has been proven to help people heal from addiction, depression, insomnia, PTSD, loss and anxiety with very positive results, and it is even being used effectively to assist children with ADHD and Autism with managing their levels of stress as well. Is there nothing that TM cannot do? It literally sounds like a wonder drug doesn't it? So why aren't we all doing it if it's so damn good?
Well the answer to that is quite simple really, it's frickin' hella expensive! Around $1500 for 4 x 60 to 90 minute sessions to be exact, and that is why we aren't all TM ourselves stupid all of the time, it's not free to get that zen apparently! However, after further delving into TM, it appears that there are in fact free avenues that can be accessed, and that you can save yourself a lot of money if you look into those methods before committing to a very expensive program.
The feedback that I have seen from the free methods, does appear to be as good as the actual TM trademark, but hey, the proof is in the pudding right? So I am personally committing to trialing a 30 day TM program (the free method of course because I am not paying anyone $1500 for four hours of meditation) and I will let you all know just how life changing TM is over the coming weeks. Will it be as amazing as all of the propaganda claims that it is? Or is TM really just a Vedic based money making machine for the rich and the famous? Watch this space and I will keep you informed as the month unfolds. 

Mental wellness is something that most of us will struggle with at some point in our lives. Even the most seemingly 'put together' people have lapses into the world of imbalanced thought and mental challenge from time to time, they are just a lot better at hiding it from everyone. However, whatever walk of life you are from, whatever your background is, whatever your social standing is, you will inevitably, at some point, feel not so fantastic, wonder what the hell you are doing with your life and question whether you are operating at your best. 
It's completely normal to not feel 100% mentally balanced all of the time, hell some people lead very regular lives and feel mostly mentally unwell a lot of the time, it's just not something that a lot of people feel comfortable about proclaiming to the world, because no-one really wants to appear like they haven't got their shit together. However, letting pride dictate how we deal with our mental health issues is archaic and unproductive to societal wellness and we really need to strive to move away from that outdated and counterproductive mindset. We all really need to know, that it is totally okay to not feel okay all of the time. 
​As time rolls on and the methods of researching mental health improve, we are learning how to diagnose, treat and support each with our mental wellness; the old school shame and stigma that was attached to mental health is now being shed and people are feeling more comfortable to come forward, share their stories and be honest about how they are feeling, and in turn receive better support than they ever have been able to before. 
It is a brave new world when it comes to mental health. Gone are the days of closet depression and hidden anxieties as people are now learning to recognize and own their individual mental wellness levels. More people than ever before are seeking treatment and support and we are slowly but surely learning tolerance, detection, prevention and intervention that will definitely set us up for a brighter future together in the coming years.
And the real work surrounding mental wellness is something that we need to be vigilant about every day.  Each of us must make an effort to recognize the signs within ourselves that tell us when our levy has run dry or we have met our own personal limits. And those limits are unique for everyone, and we must respect that and support that understanding. We must become ninjas at recognizing when we are at the top of our game and when we may be feeling weak. When we are at our peak, we have an obligation to assist those that may be feeling weak, and when we are weak we need to feel safe and secure enough to seek support from the strong. We all owe it to each other to be tolerant, supportive and unwavering in our commitment to our own mental health and our support of the wellness of others. 
R U OK? Day is coming up on Thursday September 13th,  which is a national day dedicated to reminding us that we need to check in with each other and support each other with mental wellness. Don't forget to check in with your friends, family, work colleagues and community on that day, and every other day that you can when you are feeling strong enough to support the wellbeing of others. Mental health is the responsibility of us all and it's not something that we can ever afford to ignore. 

Growing up, it's a pretty overrated thing to do if you ask me. You only get to be a kid for around 18 years (although to be honest it is probably more like 15 years these days because the pressures, decision making and expectations start really early for kids now) and then after that, you're an adult - for the rest of your life! And being a 'grown up' is mostly just one big mix of constant responsibility and expectation, and although there is a lot of emotional intelligence that comes with being an adult, a lot of the other stuff is not nearly as fun as I imagined that it would be when I was a child. 
As a child I just wanted to grow up to look as hot as one of those sexy chicks from ABBA and wear really cool clothes, drink coloured liquids from flashy glasses and wear lurid make-up, because that is what cool adults appeared to be doing when I was growing up. I imagined that adult life would be uber cool, carefree and would basically resemble one big unending party of awesomeness where you got to eat whatever you wanted to and drink alcohol and dance the night away every night of the week; which I suppose that you can do as an adult if you don't have any real responsibilities. But who the hell has no real responsibilities? A Kardashian? No, not even a Kardashian, because I am pretty sure that even they probably do have things to get done as well! Seriously, a completely carefree adult life is pretty much a total pipe dream because all adults (even the really rich and famous ones) have responsibilities.
​Unfortunately, as a child, adults never tell you about all of the incredible responsibility and expectation to succeed that comes with being a grown up, but they really should.  I know that I wouldn't have been in a such a damn rush to grow up if I had known how difficult it was to be an adult for the rest of my life. I wish that I had had a realistic idea of what being an adult looked like, because it looks nothing like ABBA or high fashion for me or most of the other adults that I know. 
Most adults that I know are often running around on empty, looking and behaving in a pretty un-glamourous state most of the time. They are often worrying about money or their employment whilst trying hard to juggle their social, private and professional lives and many of them often claim to feel utterly overwhelmed with responsibility. Now if someone had of told me about that, and the realities of how you feel after partying every night, then I would not have rushed through my brief childhood years wishing that I was a grown up.
On the contrary, I think that I would have milked the shit out of being a kid for a bit longer! I like to think that I have still reserved some level of childlike whimsy in my life, but  let's not bullshit ourselves here, no almost 45 year old woman can get away with claiming their 'childlike whimsy' without raising a few eyebrows, it's considered too weird, even for the most open minded of us. And even though we all know how tough it is to be an adult and how much we all need respite from all of the pressure and responsibility of being an adult, we still willingly deny ourselves the opportunity to a embrace our childlike whimsy, which is pretty sad really. And not only  do we deny ourselves of it, we also frown upon other adults that are doing it because it is considered to be a bit on the kooky side. 
Well, if you know that you are doing that, than you need to stop doing it immediately. All adults need to not only keep a sense of childlike whimsy in their lives, but they need to reconnect with that part of themselves that believes that life can be carefree and fun, like we all believed it was when we were children. If you allow your life to get too bogged down in responsibility and expectation, then you stop really living and you just start surviving, and life is not meant to be survived, it is meant to be lived. Lived like you lived it as a child, without constant worry and concern, but with a sense of being in the moment and grabbing as much fun out of every minute along the way as you can. 
You may not be able to do it everyday, but on some days, you most certainly still can. You can still do loads of the things that will make you forget about your adult concerns for a minute and just be in the moment, you just have remember how to do it. Most of us forgotten how good it feels to forget our troubles and responsibilities and just cut loose. It is totally okay to dance all night long, or run in the grass, or drink coloured drinks from fancy glasses, or fly a kite, or climb a tree, or skip with a rope, or sing at the top of your voice when no-one is around.....or to just feel alive. That childlike whimsy may not be something that you feel particularly connected to any more, but you can't let go of your inner child, not ever. Your ability to reconnect to the wonder and free abandon of your inner child will help you to recognise how important it is to let go from time to time. 
​Allow yourself a bit of time to be childlike again, you'll be surprised how good it feel to not be in an adult mindset for a spell. Being an adult has it's rewards, but being in touch with your childlike whimsy is exceptionally rejuvenating and I highly recommend a break from adulting whenever you get the chance. 

CORALINE 
Release Date: 2009
Rating: PG
Running Time: 100 mins
Based on the Neil Gaiman novella of the same name, this stop-motion realisation is a dark little tale indeed. Having also read the book, I was delighted to see that none of the magic or the macabre had been watered down, but this is definitely not a movie for smaller children and parents should heed its PG rating. 
When curious Coraline finds another world that is a strange and yet more exciting version of her own, she thinks she has hit the jackpot. But things are not as they seem in this other world and something sinister is at play. 
Under Henry Selick's direction (Nightmare Before Christmas and James and the Giant Peach) you are going to get creepy undertones and deep metaphors, but you'll also get intelligent children's cinema, so hooray for that - I loved it!
FINAL SAY: I don't want buttons for eyes!
4 Chilli Peppers ​

Last night I went to see BlacKkKlansman at the cinema, which I really enjoyed and felt was very 'of the moment' given the climate of racial tensions around the globe at the moment. The movie really got me thinking about how undeniably evident it is that we have such a long way to go when it comes to tolerance, equality and prejudice, and I feel really overwhelmed by the amount of hate that still exists in our so called civilised and evolved world. And all of that hate does pose some concerning questions around the true nature of how evolved we really are. 
I only recently discovered that it is frowned upon to use the term #alllivesmatter. I must have been living under a rock for the last 3 years, because I had always believed that it was a slogan associated with a person's respect for every living thing -  equally - every human, every animal and every plant - EVERYTHING LIVING! But apparently that hippy theory of mine is definitely not the case. 
To use or support #alllivesmatter is considered deeply offensive because white people have used it as a form of racial slander against the #blacklivesmatter campaign, which in turn created further tensions and stirred up more hate and fighting, and now there is no way that I can use that term in good conscience.
I am so naive about the whole topic that I literally had no idea that it was even racially linked! I genuinely do believe that all lives matter but I am definitely not going to use that term again because for one thing, I am white and for another, I am afraid that I will offend someone unintentionally if I do use it. I am most certainly not at a racist, and I would not like to be mistaken for one just because I ignorantly misused the term #alllivesmatter. 
​There is just no room in this world for all of the hate and all of the tension that is occurring on a daily basis. There is absolutely nothing to be gained from everyone pointing out how different we all are from each other all of the time, what we really should be working harder to do is to find more common ground. We are all more alike than we are unalike, and when it comes to this beautiful planet of ours we really are all on the same side. 
We need to unite and together we need to march for peace not power. We need to celebrate our differences and empower each other to love and most importantly to heal from a very fractured past. We need to learn to stand tall side by side, against tyranny and oppression, and find peaceful ways to move forwards together with our energies firmly invested on nurturing our planet...but we all know that we are not even close to achieving that goal right now. 
While our planet, the one place that we all share together and the one thing that we all have in common withers beneath our feet, we - the people of the globe, would still rather fight and disempower and hate and rape and pillage and steal and condemn; and honestly it just breaks my heart that we are still so damn disillusioned and blinded that we can't see how easy it would be to just love one another instead.
Call me a hippy, call me a dreamer and yes, I suppose that I am both of those things, but you cannot deny that the world would be a far better place to live if we could all just move forward together with a greater purpose. I would love to see that happen in my lifetime, but in reality I am happy to plan and work towards it happening in my grandchildren's; because like I said, we've got a long way to go and the work needs to start now. 

I adore music and just like movies and TV, I love music in all forms and all genres, with the exception of Country and Western and Scream-O, I just can't get into them, and I sincerely apologise to any die hard C & W  or S-O fans out there, but I have tried both and they are definitely not for me. However in saying that, I do respect that both of those music genres have a lot of avid fans. And I also strongly believe that any form of music that can transport you to another place or make you feel a certain way is a success on some level. Whether you like a certain style of music or not is irrelevant anyway, because music is an art form and it is not supposed to appeal to everyone's tastes, and like art is about finding a form that suits you and your personal taste the best. 
It is music's unfailing ability to create a mood, set a scene or transport you to another time that appeals to me the most. I have music compilations on Spotify for every mood and moment, from deep transcendental meditations to high energy dance music, and I regularly listen to them all.
The other day while I was perusing Pinterest I came across a list of 30 questions about music that was a lot of fun to complete. The list of questions had me rummaging about through my old CD collection and scrolling through my playlists and reminiscing about all of my favourite songs. I found myself downloading and listening to a heap of songs that I had long forgotten about, and because I had such a great time answering the questions on that list, then I thought that I should share it with you all so that you can have a go at answering them as well.
I would also like to note that it is a lot of fun to complete this list after you've had a couple of drinks, and it would probably be really good fun to complete with a friend and/or partner as well, but you can always just go solo as I did and still have a blast belting out your old favourite tunes.
So, without further ado, here is the list:
1. A song you like with a colour in the title.
2. A song you like with a number in it.
3. A song that reminds you of the summertime.
4. A song that reminds you of someone that you would rather forget about.
5. A song that needs to be played LOUD!
6. A song that makes you want to dance.
7. A song to drive to.
8. A song about drugs or alcohol.
9. A song that makes you happy.
10. A song that makes you sad.
11. A song that you never get tired of.
12. A song from your preteen years.
13. One of your favourite songs from the 80's.
14. A song that you would love to have played/ or played at your wedding.
15. A cover song that you love.
16. A classical song that you love.
17. A duet song that you would be willing to perform at karaoke.
18. A song from the year that you were born that you love.
19. A song that make you ponder life. 
20. A song that you want played at your funeral.
21. A favourite song with a person's name in the title.
22. A song that motivates you to get going or move on. 
23. A song that you think that everyone should listen to. 
24. A song that you love by an artist that has died.
25. A song by a band that you wish were still together.
26. A song that makes you think about falling in love.
27. A song that breaks your heart.
28. A song by an artist with a voice that you love.
29. A song from your childhood.
30. A song that you think best sums up who you are. 
There you go, hours of musical thinking, pondering and some deep emotional responses to get through on that list, and I still haven't even finished my own list completely yet, it's a work in progress.
If this list doesn't define some of your musical preferences for you, then I don't know if anything will, but anyway, just go and get lost in some musical memories for a few hours because it's just a really nice thing to do a rainy day. 

WHIPLASH
Release Date: 2014
Rating: MA 15+
Running Time: 107 mins 
Written and directed by Damien Chazelle, and based on his experiences in the Princeton High School Studio Band, this film took the cinematic world by surprise with it's gripping and inspiring story about an ambitious young drummer. J.K. Simmons won the Academy Award for Best Supporting Actor for his disturbing portrayal of the abusive teacher Fletcher, and the movie has since gone on to win a host of over 80 other film awards. 
When Andrew (Miles Teller) finally gets accepted into a prestigious jazz music academy for his drumming abilities, he thinks that his dreams have come true. However, he soon realises that his teacher, Professor Terence Fletcher (J.K. Simmons), is a tyrannical perfectionist that will push Andrew to his limits and beyond. 
There is such a raw intensity to this movie; watching the determination of  Andrew as he struggles with his emotional abuse in search of his artistic glory is pretty tough going. When it comes to Whiplash, it truly is a case of 'the agony and the ecstasy,' and with that heart thumping soundtrack racing along in the background all of the time, it keeps a dramatic and intense pace. 
FINAL SAY: Were you rushing or were you dragging? 
3.5 Chilli Peppers ​

Even though I like to think of myself as being reasonably tech savvy, the truth is that I am still totally old school when it comes to certain things. Everyone that was born a Gen X (as I was) or earlier likes to imagine that they are really up with the latest mod cons and gadgetry that is available today, but anyone that even says 'mod cons' is not nearly as tech savvy as they would like to think they are and I know for a fact that I fall into that category. 
I shamefully still read all of my books and magazines in hard copy, regardless of the abundant opportunities that I have to go digital, which is pretty crazy but hey, I like to feel a book in my hand, it's part of my make up now. In fact I even still subscribe to magazines in hard copy and borrow books and DVD's from the local library  which I am pretty sure that no-one under 40 is doing these days. But as I said, it's in my blood now. When you have been doing something for long enough, it is hard to let go of it, even when you are aware that a new and probably better way is available to you. 
So is that just a way of kicking it old school or is it really being an old fuddy duddy pain in the arse? Because I think that I am starting to tread a thin line lately. I still adore a whole lot of old school and dated things that most people are totally over. Like photographs, not instagram shots, but real photos of real people doing real things, that you can hold in your hand. Why do people not like photographs as much anymore? I am still nuts about photos and photo albums and I especially like really old photographs. I also still adore the virtually unused but absolutely amazing fountain pen, and I adore handwritten notes, poetry, cards and letters. I love home cooking, board games, collecting and handwriting recipes into my recipe book, keeping a journal, baking bread, picnics, talking on the phone and retro music compilations. 
Just the other day I caught myself reminiscing about an old school milk bar, the type that had all of the one and two cent lollies lined up under the glass and you could get a little white bag of goodies that were individually selected for just 10 cents. And there were real treasures to be had if you could be patient enough to save up for them, like the all so chic chocolate cigarettes at 25 cents a packet or the illustrious Bubble O' Bill that would set you back a few days of after school bliss to indulge in. I hate to use the term kids these days, but hell, I kind of have to....kids these days will never understand the joy of such a selection or the excitement that was felt when you spied the stamp for a free Sunny Boy ice block on the inside of the wrapper of the one that you had just opened. Pure innocent joy.
And kids today will never understand that joy because everything for them now is completely accessible and available all of the time. Nothing when I was growing up was available all of the time, and although it meant that we had to wait for everything, I think that we also cared about it more for that reason as well. It is true that innovation and technology has enabled a lot of progression, but some of those advances have caused societal and social setbacks that I doubt that any of us could've predicted.
So many people are virtually glued to their devices 24/7 now and they are completely removed from a lot of simple life pleasures. People are spending hours posting pictures, having rants and sharing various goings on about their lives on social media, but half of them don't even know how to hold a decent conversation anymore. It's pretty woeful in some respects. If keeping some old school practises alive makes me feel more alive and in touch with my life, then I am certainly not in any hurry to give them away. Call me corny or old fashioned, it really doesn't matter to me. I like what I like, and although I do love technology, I will always have a place in my heart for the traditional, the old school and the outdated things, even when everyone else has decided that they are unnecessary. 
​And did I tell you how much I love old school horror yet?