This week was book week, so all of the children and staff at school were encouraged to dress up as a favourite story book character. I love book week, and have indulged my strong fantasy side every year by LARPing it up and portraying a variety of characters over the years. In past years I have been Dorothy from The Wizard of Oz, The Mad Hatter from Alice in Wonderland, Wednesday from the Addams Family, Mike TV from Charlie and the Chocolate Factory and even Wally from Where's Wally? 
This year I managed to coerce my muggle (non-magical) team into dressing up as the characters from Harry Potter. Given the fact that most of them have never even read the book, which is a tragedy in itself, I was not sure how a bunch of squibs were going to pull it all off. I was pleasantly surprised and completely delighted to see that everyone gave it a damn good go, especially considering that most of them really had no idea of who they were meant to be portraying. Sure Dumbledore did look more like Gandalf, and none of our Gryffindor uniforms matched, but in the end I am pretty sure that people knew who we were meant to be. I have to say that for a bunch of catholics they really did a pretty decent job of portraying a bunch of magical folk, and finally I can put my need to have a Harry Potter book week dress up theme to bed - because I have been wanting one for years. 
I may not have been the most convincing Harry Potter, but I have to admit that getting to ride around on my makeshift Nimbus for a day and point my wand at annoying kids and say things like pertrificus totalus, sectumsempra or avada kedavra without them having any idea what I was saying, was actually pretty good fun; working in a school does certainly have its perks. 

THE HARRY POTTER SERIES
1. Harry Potter and The Philosopher's Stone
2. Harry Potter and The Chamber of Secrets
3. Harry Potter and The Prisoner of Azkaban
4. Harry Potter and The Goblet of Fire 
5. Harry Potter and The Order of the Phoenix
6. Harry Potter and The Half Blood Prince
7. Harry Potter and The Deathly Hallows Part 1
8. Harry Potter and The Deathly Hallows Part 2
Release Dates: 2001, 2002, 2004, 2005, 2007, 2009, 2010 and 2011
Rating: The first three - PG The rest - M 
Running Time: Total - Approx 1200 Mins (each film is approx. 2.5 hrs)
If I was reviewing the books instead of the movies here, it would be going straight to the Hall of Fame because the Harry Potter series is my favourite book series of all time. Not that I want to take away from the movies at all, because they are an incredible body of work produced over a full decade and I did go to the cinema to see each and every one of them. 
We watch Harry Potter (Daniel Radcliffe)and his trusty best friends Hermione (Emma Watson) and Ron (Rupert Grint) grow up and develop throughout the series; witnessing all of their trials and triumphs from childhood to adulthood. The films are beautifully set against the backdrop of Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry, London and the British countryside, all of which are visually pleasing in every way. 
The story line is just epic, the characters are incredibly extensive and each movie journals another year of the children's lives and another set of challenges that ultimately lead us closer and closer to the inevitable battle of good vs evil - Harry vs Voldemort. Each movie gets a little darker and clearly more complicated, ending in a very adult two part finale. 
When it comes to magic, this series wins hands down, everyone that watches will be longing to go Hogwarts and get their first wand. The cast is strong and diverse, the CGI is effective and not over done and the whole experience is just...well, dare I say it....magical!
FINAL SAY: The best magical series ever made. 
4.5 Chili Peppers

Had a bit of a giggle when I read back to my New Years resolutions blog, what the hell was I thinking? How on earth I thought that I was going to get all that done in a year is quite amusing, but at least I have had a good stab at it. With only four months left of the year, I think that it only fair to say that I will not be successfully meeting all of my resolution plans, but I will at least meet some. 
The first resolution I have well in hand, and that was the most important one to me, which was to finish all of the reviews that I had listed on my genre lists (about 310 films). I am confident that I will have that done before 31st December as I have hit that one hard this year. 
The second resolution was to drink more water, and I have also managed to do that this year, I never go anywhere without my drink bottle these days, so I think that I can safely check that one off too. 
Now I get to the ugly end of my resolution stick, fair to say that I have really reneged in the 'do half an hour of exercise a day' department. I was all gung-ho when the weather was fine, but then around April it got cold and since then my exercise regime has consisted of a walk a to the back deck for a cigarette. So, yeah, epic fail on that one, can't make that happen now, but I will make a solid when the sun arrives again. 
The next resolution was to take up meditation and do it twice a week. If staring glassy eyed at late night horror movies with a glass of scotch in hand counts as meditation, then I can safely say yep, I did that. Otherwise, again epic fail. I did try out meditation for about six weeks, and was going well, but then I got busy and blah blah....I just didn't do it. Maybe that will be one for next year.
I have gone really well with my 'plan a gathering or get together once a month' resolution, which on checking back I have managed to do - even if they were often just small gatherings, so I am thinking that I could probably tick that one off too. And the last one - the 'pay something forward or complete an act of random kindness once a week' I think that I have done okay with. I have tried to be more mindful of the needs of others this year and have attempted to do random nice things for people  and even strangers from time to time, I dunno if I can say that I have managed one a week - I certainly haven't clocked them so it is hard to say, but I have tried to be nicer and surely that counts for something? 
So, not a total wipe out but certainly room for improvement. Might make things a little more manageable for myself next year, like smoke a pack of cigarettes and drink a full bottle of scotch a week. Or, take a trip every month to a new and exciting place, or eat a different packet of chips every week of the year, or watch 5 movies a week, yeah that's a good one. Or even watch other people exercise whilst I lay on the deck reading...they all seem do-able to me. The possibilities are endless. 

THE BIG LEBOWSKI
Release Date: 1998
Rating: R 18+
Running Time: 117 mins 
A brilliant crime-comedy written, produced and directed by Joel and Ethan Coen that was loosely inspired by the writings of Raymond Chandler, a crime novelist who wrote hopelessly complex mysteries that had ultimately unimportant plot lines. Although The Big Lebowski suffered rather low box office success, it went onto become a cult classic, mostly due to its idiosyncratic characters and unconventional dialogue. 
Jeff Lebowski, or 'The Dude' is mistaken for the millionaire Jeff Lebowski, and finds himself thrust into the middle of an extremely messy affair involving a soiled carpet, an erotic artistic, a sexy young wife, some bowling buddies, the cops, a lot of bad guys and a swag of White Russian cocktails. 
The rest, well its a pretty complex tale with loads of zany characters, tonnes of fabulous music, some crazy dream sequences and a lot of well written and very clever humour. The cast is just magic, Jeff Bridges really brings 'The Dude' to life with his laid back, jelly-sandaled, dopey grinning portrayal of a guy that ultimately just wants to get his rug replaced. John Goodman, Steve Buscemi, Julianne Moore, Sam Elliot and John Tuturro are just a few of the supporting cast that really shine here, bringing together a marvelously unique, unusual and unforgettable film.  
FINAL SAY: That rug really tied the room together, did it not? 
4.5 Chili Peppers

Two full days of mild, not hot, but mild weather over the weekend has allowed me to get a shit load of things done. I have done so many things this weekend, I'm actually pretty pleased with myself. 
Craig and I have finally managed to reign in the terror that was our yard, which was rapidly looking like a set from Jurassic World and after about 4 hours of cutting, hacking, mowing and weeding, we have a beautiful yard again. Woohoo - go team!
I have also managed to review a heap of movies on my site, update my art journal, prepare a swag of things that needed to be done for next week (so that I am actually ahead of the game for once), groom my veggie patch, kick start my PMP reports, bake a batch of brownies, cook a roast, get all of my laundry under control and even wasted two hours gaming with Seth on the Playstation. Mum of the fricken year or what? 
I love a productive weekend, admittedly I am a bit stuffed now, but I am feeling ready for the coming week. I feel like the fog of illness and melancholy has truly gone and with a whiff of Spring in the air, I am looking forward to brighter days ahead. 

CLOUDY WITH A CHANCE OF MEATBALLS
Release Date: 2009
Rating: PG 
Running Time: 90 mins 
I was so pleasantly surprised by this film, I wasn't holding out a lot of hope given the odd title, but this movie was actually loads of fun to watch and really very funny. Based on the children's book of the same name by Judi and Ron Barrett, this science fiction computer-animation film is clever and engaging. 
A wannabe scientist and inventor named Flint Lockwood struggles with his many failed experiments, his technophobic widowed father and the terrible small town attitudes of Swallow Falls. However, when he invents the FLDSMDFR (Flint Lockwood Diatonic Super Mutating Dynamic Food Replicator) and food starts to rain from the skies, he becomes an overnight success. With the high demand for raining foods, Flint over uses his invention and the food begins to mutate and take on a life of it's own. 
A fabulous cast has voiced all of the main characters including Bill Hader, Anna Faris, James Caan and Bruce Campbell; and I especially enjoyed Neil Patrick Harris' character Steve the Monkey who communicates through a 'Speak and Spell' translator. 
Having seen the sequel Cloudy with a Chance of Meatballs 2, I can assure you that none of the momentum from the first instalment has been lost, and it it equally as enjoyable as the first. Bottom line is, that these are fast paced, witty animations that are just plain good fun.
FINAL SAY: Have you ever felt like you were a little bit different? 
3.5 Chili Peppers

When the going gets tough, you really get to see people's true colours. It is interesting to observe how far the empathy for others in need will extend, as it is clearly different for everyone. 
For some it is an endless stretch, like an expensive elastic, these people will go to any length to be there, or to reach out with a kind word, or even to offer a helping hand. Other people snap like a dry twig and turn into malicious bastards, suddenly showing bitterness towards those in need and really exposing themselves for the assholes that they are. 
We all know an asshole, unfortunately they turn up everywhere. In the work place, at the supermarket, in the doctor's waiting room and for the really unlucky, in your own home. I am always flabbergasted by how seriously shitty these assholes can be, especially during times of need. 
I must remind myself that some people are only motivated by the needs of themselves, and really couldn't give a flipping shit about the struggles of others. But I just find it so hard to deal with the genuine meanness of some people, the horrid things that they say and do that reflect so much about who they truly are and the fact that they think nothing of adding another layer of shit to an already overloaded crap-cart. And to what purpose? 
Yes, there is nothing like a crisis to really bring out the true colours of others, for good and for bad. I just thank my lucky stars that I have a lot more helping hands in my life than I do shit shovelers, because even small spells around those assholes is enough to do my head in. 

ANTICHRIST
Release Date: 2009 
Rating: R 18+
Running Time: 108 mins 
After their son dies in an accident whilst the couple are having sex, the two characters, simply called 'He and She', fall into a deep grief. 'She' cannot move on with her grief and seeks medical help, but her husband, a therapist, insists on dealing with her trauma himself. The two retreat to an abandon holiday cabin in the woods called Eden, where the husband sets upon on a series of psychotherapy experiments, with terrible outcomes.
Although this movie has been called an experimental horror, I would say that it is more horrific than horror. Director and writer Lars von Trier did draw inspiration from horror, but he also drew inspiration from a documentary that he saw about European forests, where these places of romance and peace were portrayed as places of great suffering and pain as the different species tried to kill and eat each other. 
The story plays out in a series of six chapters, a prologue, four chapters (Grief, Pain, Despair and The Three Beggars) and an epilogue. As the movie progresses, the characters spiral further down into their own hell and succumb to a series of increasingly violent and sadomasochist acts. Antichrist is also speckled with disturbing hallucinations and visions of animals that appear to be possessed or unnatural, which adds another esoteric and creepy layer to the already hugely intensified script. 
This is an uncomfortable film, it certainly isn't easy to watch people mutilating themselves and each other, and I really wouldn't recommended this film to people with a sensitive disposition. Some scenes are shockingly graphic, and the entire script is essentially an extremely dark composition of mental illness and despair, which is never going to appeal to the masses. But if you have the stomach for it, it is a movie that you will never forget. 
FINAL SAY: Chaos reigns. 
3 Chili Peppers

Had a friend around for Sunday lunch and felt totally inspired by my sister's recent email from the Middle East to make a middle eastern lunch. I made delicious spiced meatballs with couscous and salad and then we had pistachio and date ice-cream for dessert, yum! I'm sure it wasn't a spot on what my sister has been experiencing, which has included quail (perhaps pigeon?), camel milk desserts and the best haloumi and hummus known to man, but it was the best that I could muster up in a pinch. 
The sickness that I told myself that I had outrun is still clinging onto me for dear life, but now I only have a slight but persistent headache and some minor body aches. Apparently there are some really nasty bugs getting around at the moment, one of Zoe's work colleagues that was only 18 years old, died on Thursday from Meningococcal, bloody horrific. Zoe worked with him on Wednesday evening and just couldn't get her head around the fact that he was gone. These random deaths can really rattle everyone, especially young people because, lets face it, we all feel a little bullet proof when we are young. This type of thing really throws all of our mortality into a unpleasantly glaring light. 
Needless to say, Zoe has needed a little bit of distraction this weekend and a measuring of oblivion - so we indulged in one of my favourite past time distractions that comes in the form of a bottle of Irish whiskey and some good old school horror, I am yet to find a better band-aid. 

SUSPIRIA
Release Date: 1977
Rating: R 18+
Running Time: 92 mins 
A classic Italian horror film directed by Dario Argento, and one of Argento's most successful feature films. Suspiria received great critical acclaim for it's visual and stylistic flair. The use of vibrant colours and high impact gothic-opera style music made it quickly rise to cult status and soon found it's way onto many 'must see' horror film lists.
Suzy (Jessica Harper) travels to Germany to join a prestigious ballet academy but soon realises that something insidious and supernatural is at play, as girls start to go missing and are murdered in a most grisly fashion. 
This is truly riveting and deeply atmospheric horror, having watched it recently I can assure you that none of it's impact has been lost over the years. There is a sinister and unsettling tone to this movie that makes even mundane objects feel completely menacing. The colour contrasts and lighting are used brilliantly to enhance and disturb, and the soundtrack is hauntingly hypnotic and nightmarish. Completely visceral, violent  and splashed with unnaturally bright red blood effects, this horror is one that you won't forget in a hurry. 
FINAL SAY: Do you know anything about witches? 
3.5 Chili Peppers

Managed to catch me some kind of stupid virus that started on Monday evening with a weird stabbing pain in my side. Felt like I had been 'screwdrivered' by Joe Pesci in the rib cage, so I took myself to bed and proceeded to have the worst fever nightmares ever. 
I vaguely remember dreaming about being placed into a straight jacket as a part of my 'therapy' - what kind of therapy I cannot say for sure, but they (whoever 'they' were) would only let me out if I would touch kids on the back - and when I did, the kids grew tails! Fricken hell, a real therapist would have a field day with that shit!
 I think that the tail bit came from grabbing the cat in my sleep, who was napping next to me, and I am pretty sure that I was tangled in the bed linen - thus the straight jacket. The kid thing? Maybe a work hangover, hard to say, but I was thrashing about and crying and yelling like a loony all night long apparently, and Craig thought that I was possessed and was soon going to start levitating above the bed. 
I finally woke myself up - carrying on like a nutter, with a cats tail in one hand and so much sweat on me I think that any minute my dream would've converted from mental hospital scenario to lost at sea. Absolutely gross! 
So anyway, struggled through Tuesday feeling like two thirds of a crap sandwich, came home and....rested.... - I bet you thought I was going to say rested. Well, I didn't, I went out for dinner with two friends and then went to see an aptly named movie, that didn't see me getting home to bed until after midnight. Perhaps I do need a straight jacket, because when that alarm went off at 6am this morning I was totally rethinking my choices. 
But I got through the day again, and I am only feeling like one third of a crap sandwich now. So, it all turned out okay, maybe I have outrun that bitch virus, well that's what I am telling myself anyway. 

TRAINWRECK
Release Date: 2015
Rating: MA 15+
Running Time: 125 mins 
Written by Amy Schumer, this is the first Judd Apatow directed movie that he didn't write himself. In the same vein as Bridesmaids, the tables are turned and it is a female that is demonstrating all of the unlikable qualities of a drunken chauvinist with virtually no moral compass. Although this movie is rough around the edges, it was refreshing to have the focus on a female protagonist for a change. 
Amy (Amy Schumer) is following her father's advise to avoid monogamy at all costs, because it isn't 'realistic.' She has had a string of one night stands and generally has little respect for men, that is until she meets Aaron (Bill Hader), the nice guy, sports injury doctor, that has her questioning her values. 
This is hardly a revelation in script writing, the story line was unoriginal and utterly predictable, but there were a lot of great one liners, which did make me laugh. The first half of the movie was hilarious but started to ebb off around the half way mark, and the ending however, was just plain awful, which was disappointing. In all honesty, I actually think that the entire movie was about a half hour too long. 
Amy Schumer does a good job of epitomizing the female chauvinist pig, and I really liked that she pushed her character to seriously unlikable lengths, giving the audience something to wrestle with in an otherwise simplistic storyline. This is worth seeing just for the great one liners, some of them are absolute corkers. 
FINAL SAY: Have you fucked before? Where is she buried? 
3 Chili Peppers

Got up at the crack of dawn on Saturday to drive to Bendigo to attend the Annual Writers Festival. With a plethora of topics and authors to choose from, I was busily trotting about from one venue to the next, taking in lectures like - Where does Horror Come From?, Risky Fictions and Plotting.
My brain was in overload, but it also made me feel inspired to write more, a lot more than I already do. Especially after hearing the experiences and thoughts of successful authors, that type of talk makes you aware of the possibilities. I was certainly ticking over with a flurry of ideas by the time I wrapped up in the early evening. But wow, what a fabulous and informative event, I will definitely return next year - great work Bendigo for hosting such an exciting and innovative festival. 
Spent the evening in Bendigo with Helen, eating far too much cheese and drinking wine, as we chatted away the night in our pajamas in front of the heater. It was a really nice way to farewell Winter, which is rapidly drawing to a close and a perfectly good waste of another weekend. 
Came home to see that my darling husband  and daughter had washed, dried, folded and put away all of the laundry for me whilst I was absent and tidied the house. Bloody perfect ending to a wonderful weekend! 

ME AND YOU AND EVERYONE WE KNOW 
Release Date: 2005
Rating: R 18+
Running Time 91 mins 
Miranda July's first offering is a break-out sensation, this is a film with real depth and a raw honesty that is generally missing from cinema. This is not a movie for people that like things to be glossy, this is a brave movie that  touches on some heavier concepts involving loneliness, estrangement and gratification. 
But, it is also a funny, touchy and albeit quirky tale about a lonely shoe salesman and an eccentric artist that are struggling to find their way in the world and into each others lives. The children in this film are comic relief as they struggle through the real agonies and awkwardness of separation and self discovery, and the adults are likable in their hopeless loneliness. You will have a reaction to this film, one way or another, that much is certain. 
Me and You and Everyone We Know won the Camera D'Or for best first feature and is definitely deserving of your time as well. 
FINAL SAY: Back and forth forever
4.5 Chili Peppers

Fine. 
It's fine.
I'm Fine.
That will be fine.
You look fine. 
What a shitty and misleading word to use, 'fine', I've never been a fan. It just has too many meanings to ever be taken as intended. If you ask someone how they are feeling, they can say 'fine', which could mean premium or just okay or not really good at all, depending on the tone and delivery - again, completely misleading!
Generally speaking, if I ask Craig how I look in an outfit and he says 'fine', then I immediately feel like I need to change. Fine....it just so bloody beige isn't it. No-one wants to go out looking 'fine', you want to go out looking good or better.
I know that I have said that I was 'fine' on occasion, when I was in fact royally annoyed to the point of wanting to knock someones lights out. So in that context, 'fine' was neither premium or just okay, it was a word that I used as a cloaking device for my real feelings of anger and frustration. 'Fine' actually meant - not 'fine' at all!
And there is that adding 'fine' to things to make it sound superior, like fine dining, or fine diamonds or damn - that girl is fine! Which makes no sense whatsoever, because I don't see 'fine' as supreme, ever. Finest maybe, but never 'fine'. 
Maybe it's just me that that spends too much time thinking about these stupid things, or maybe it's a chick thing, because Craig certainly doesn't seem to understand my eye rolls when he says the word 'fine'. 
Oh well, never mind....not worth pondering...it is 'fine' really.....

EYES WIDE SHUT
Release Date: 1999
Rating: R 18+
Running Time: 159 mins 
Loosely based on Arthur Schnitzler's 1926 novella Traumnouvelle (Dream Story), this was Stanley Kubrick's final movie, as he died six days after showing the final cut to Warner Bros. studios. It's strong sexual content made it highly controversial, and although it received positive critic reviews, it was generally not  adored by greater public audiences.
The story is focused on a married couple, Dr Bill Harford (Tom Cruise) and his wife Alice (Nicole Kidman). Alice admits to Bill that she has had sexual fantasies about another man, which in turn sets Bill off on a dangerous tangent of sexual discovery and infidelity. 
Cruise and Kidman were married during the filming of this movie, and their on screen chemistry is extremely powerful  and really adds another dimension to the overall feel of the film. As with all Kubrick movies, this film is heavy on atmosphere and rife with intensely gripping interludes, and I found the entire experience hypnotic and utterly engrossing. Love it or hate it, this is a cinematic experience that no-one should miss. 
FINAL SAY: If you men only knew....
4 Chili Peppers

Ventured out to one of the bigger shopping complexes in Ballarat today to run some errands and do a bit of people watching. People just don't seem to give a shit about what they are wearing or what they are doing in public on a Sunday afternoon, especially around one of the dicier areas of town. 
It reminded me a bit of the 'Walmartian' photos that you seen online of the weird Walmart shoppers in America. Today I saw people bopping around with their g-bangers hanging out, their muffin tops bouncing proudly over their strained skinny leg jeans, and I even saw a granny shadily slugging out of a bottle concealed in a plastic bag whilst she sat on a bench ogling suspiciously at everyone else. One guy that was shopping in EB Games was wearing a tucked in flannelette shirt, high-waisted jeans and ugg boots, it's been a while since I saw anything that would even come close to that ensemble. 
Don't get me wrong, I am hardly the fashion police, I only wore a T-shirt and jeans myself, but I did manage shoes and a rough hair brushing before I left home, which was clearly a lot more than most. The best bit was when we were leaving and there was a young girl of about six asking her clearly very classy mum, when she would be allowed to use swear words, to which her mum replied never. The girl's response to that answer was "then why do you get to use them all the time?" I had a laugh out loud moment, priceless. 
Yes, if you are ever feeling a little low or concerned about your appearance, there is no better pick me up than the Sunday arvo shoppers of Ballarat, it's a heady mixture of the bad, the very bad and the downright hideous, and the perfect remedy to cure any self-loathing. 

SEVEN PSYCHOPATHS
Release Date: 2012
Rating: R 18+
Running Time: 110 mins 
From In Bruge creator Martin McDonagh, comes another offbeat comedy thriller filled with razor sharp wit and intense violence. The sheer absurdity and social awkwardness of the characters in this movie, is what makes it so enjoyable, I was laughing out loud all the way through. 
A struggling and somewhat boozy writer (Colin Farrell) inadvertently becomes entangled in a world of crime when his two oddball friends (Christopher Walken and Sam Rockwell) steal a gangster's (Woody Harrelson) beloved Shih-Tzu. 
The fact that so much tension is built around a story about a stolen little dog is clever, and the cast are tremendously good, all bouncing off each other and giving edge to their unique and at times disturbing characters. I found the weird mix of  back stories particularly interesting due to their ability to be  so unsettlingly funny. It's one to watch with an open mind. 
FINAL SAY: Is that a guinea pig? 
4 Chili Peppers