As the rural Victorian children both sheepishly and excitedly returned to onsite learning this week, in my mind I was saying a little prayer in the hope that we do not go into a third round of COVID-19 lockdowns and restrictions. The prospect of another term of remote and online learning makes me feel slightly nauseous and although the teachers all did a tremendous job of making it work, we can't really kid ourselves into thinking that it was the best model for learning. Tolerable but far from ideal would be my best estimation of remote learning. 
However, in the grand scheme of things Australia is fairing pretty well, with many countries around the globe succumbing to what can only be described as catastrophic COVID-19 circumstances. Even Donald Trump, for all of his bullshit and bravado has fallen ill to the virus and will hopefully now finally admit that America has a very big COVID problem. However given the fact that has been seen unmasked, posing for photographers and out and about in public when he is still considered to be contagious, well let's just say that I am not going to hold my breath. 
And so, in this most unusual climate we begin the work of attempting to find ourselves again. We try to establish a new norm and acceptance that this is now the new norm because life is going to be different and it is going to be different for an unperceivable length of time. And even when we do fully re-emerge after a vaccine has been created, the world will never be the same again because there's no denying that we have all been changed by this pandemic. We will be excited to be experiencing real freedom again, but also filled with trepidation and worry about whether anything like this could happen to us again. 
Just like our forefathers understood the worry of war, we in 2020 understand the worry of pandemic. A faceless and indiscriminate danger that can consume much of our previously joyful and carefree thinking with fear and concern. However, just like the countless brave humans that have inhabited this planet for thousands of years before us, we cannot succumb or surrender to our worry or worst case scenario fears; we must, for want of a better way to put it, keep calm and carry on. 
Basically, no amount of worry will change what we are facing now and no sleepless nights in the future will guarantee our safety in years to come, so the only reasonable thing that we can do is stay hopeful, support each other and believe that the best days are ahead of us. COVID-19 may have made the world different, but it has also highlighted just how alike we all are and how much we all need each other.
The expressions on the faces of the children as they returned to onsite learning spoke volumes to me and what I took away from our first week back at school together was how great it was to be around a lot of young and vibrant people again and share in their experiences. It really galvanized my thoughts around how much we do have to look forward to together as we find our way out of this mess. 
So here we go again, praying that this time we have reduced the number of infections enough to enjoy some civil liberties and social experiences. Hoping that conditions improve quickly for the countries who are suffering the most and knowing without a shadow of doubt that we absolutely must count our blessings on the daily and never ever take anything for granted ever again.
With a hopeful heart I say, let's give this another shot!

THE FAREWELL
Release Date: 2019
Rating: PG
Running Time: 100 mins 
​An American- Chinese drama/comedy written and directed by Lulu Wang and partly based on her own real life experiences. The Farewell delivers a beautiful and complicated family story that really touched my heart with it's intense sense of loyalty, tradition and good intentioned ideals. 
American independent writer Billi finds herself flung back into the arms of her extended family in China when her grandmother (Nai Nai) is diagnosed with terminal lung cancer. The family try to support the dying matriarch by not telling her about her cancer and instead create a fake family wedding in order to gather everyone together for one last celebration that will also serve many as a form of farewell. 
This script is so tender and believable; it is such a delight to watch. Awkwafina is incredible as Billi and she brings lots of humour and genuine love to her relationship with her Nai Nai, who is played perfectly by  Zhao Shuzhen. The Farewell is testament to the fact that real life stories about family traditions and ideas are not only interesting but also extremely inspiring. 
FINAL SAY: Chinese people have a saying, when people get cancer they die. It's not cancer that kills them, it's the fear. 
4 Chilli Peppers ​

The Emmy awards were held last Monday, which I was again fortunate enough to be at home to enjoy - Hazar! This year was the first time that a big awards ceremony was held remotely due to COVID19 and I have to say that although yes, it wasn't as good as the usual extravaganza of glitz and glamour that we have come to expect from the Emmy's, however given the circumstances it was still really enjoyable and completely watchable. Hosted by Jimmy Kimmel who apparently said "I don't know where we will do this or how we will do this or even why we are doing this, but we are doing it and I am hosting it" when he found out that the Emmy's were still going ahead in spite of the worldwide pandemic. And seriously, why shouldn't it go ahead? We need a little bit of celebration and frivolity right now and I always appreciate a good awards ceremony regardless of the format. 
Anyway, it was Schitt's Creek's night for sure when they won an incredible and completely deserving nine Emmy's in total and broke the record for the most wins in a single season for a comedy. And having seen almost all of the TV programs that won, I can definitely say that every winner was deserving and I was not surprised to see that Succession and Watchmen blitz the evening as well because they were easily two of my favourite TV programs of the year. 
And just in case you missed them, here are the nominations and winners of the 2020 Emmy Awards:
Outstanding comedy series

• Curb Your Enthusiasm
• Dead to Me
• The Good Place
• Insecure
• The Kominsky Method
• The Marvelous Mrs. Maisel
• WINNER: Schitt's Creek
• What We Do in the Shadows

Outstanding drama series

• Better Call Saul
• The Crown
• The Handmaid's Tale
• Killing Eve
• The Mandalorian
• Ozark
• Stranger Things
• WINNER: Succession

Outstanding limited series

• Little Fires Everywhere
• Mrs. America
• Unbelievable
• Unorthodox
• WINNER: Watchmen

Lead actor in a comedy series

• Anthony Anderson, Black-ish
• Don Cheadle, Black Monday
• Ted Danson, The Good Place
• Michael Douglas, The Kominsky Method
• WINNER: Eugene Levy, Schitt's Creek
• Ramy Youssef, Ramy

Lead actress in a comedy series

• Christina Applegate, Dead to Me
• Rachel Brosnahan, The Marvellous Mrs. Maisel
• Linda Cardellini, Dead to Me
• WINNER: Catherine O'Hara, Schitt's Creek
• Issa Rae, Insecure
• Tracee Ellis Ross, Black-ish

Supporting actor in a comedy series

• Andre Braugher, Brooklyn Nine-Nine
• William Jackson Harper, The Good Place
• Alan Arkin, The Kominsky Method
• Sterling K. Brown, The Marvelous Mrs. Maisel
• Tony Shalhoub, The Marvelous Mrs. Maisel
• Mahershala Ali, Ramy
• Kenan Thompson, Saturday Night Live
• WINNER: Dan Levy, Schitt's Creek

Supporting actress in a comedy series

• Betty Gilpin, GLOW
• D'Arcy Carden, The Good Place
• Yvonne Orji, Insecure
• Alex Borstein, The Marvelous Mrs. Maisel
• Marin Hinkle, The Marvelous Mrs. Maisel
• Kate McKinnon, Saturday Night Live
• Cecily Strong, Saturday Night Live
• WINNER: Annie Murphy, Schitt's Creek

Lead actor in a drama series

• Jason Bateman, Ozark
• Sterling K. Brown, This Is Us
• Steve Carell, The Morning Show
• Brian Cox, Succession
• Billy Porter, Pose
• WINNER: Jeremy Strong, Succession

Lead actress in a drama series

• Jennifer Aniston, The Morning Show
• Olivia Colman, The Crown
• Jodie Comer, Killing Eve
• Laura Linney, Ozark
• Sandra Oh, Killing Eve
• WINNER: Zendaya, Euphoria

Supporting actor in a drama series

• Giancarlo Esposito, Better Call Saul
• Bradley Whitford, The Handmaid's Tale
• WINNER: Billy Crudup, The Morning Show
• Mark Duplass, The Morning Show
• Nicholas Braun, Succession
• Kieran Culkin, Succession
• Matthew Macfadyen, Succession
• Jeffrey Wright, Westworld

Supporting actress in a drama series

• Laura Dern, Big Little Lies
• Meryl Streep, Big Little Lies
• Helena Bonham Carter, The Crown
• Samira Wiley, The Handmaid's Tale
• Fiona Shaw , Killing Eve
• WINNER: Julia Garner, Ozark
• Sarah Snook, Succession
• Thandie Newton, Westworld

Lead actor in a limited series or movie

• Jeremy Irons, Watchmen
• Hugh Jackman, Bad Education
• Paul Mescal, Normal People
• Jeremy Pope, Hollywood
• WINNER: Mark Ruffalo, I Know This Much Is True

Lead actress in a limited series or movie

• Cate Blanchett, Mrs. America
• Shira Haas, Unorthodox
• WINNER: Regina King, Watchmen
• Octavia Spencer, Self Made
• Kerry Washington, Little Fires Everywhere

Supporting actor in a limited series or movie

• Dylan McDermott, Hollywood
• Jim Parsons, Hollywood
• Tituss Burgess, Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt: Kimmy vs. the Reverend
• WINNER: Yahya Abdul-Mateen II, Watchmen
• Jovan Adepo, Watchmen
• Louis Gossett Jr, Watchmen

Supporting actress in a limited series or movie

• Holland Taylor, Hollywood
• WINNER: Uzo Aduba, Mrs. America
• Margo Martindale, Mrs. America
• Tracey Ullman, Mrs. America
• Toni Collette, Unbelievable
• Jean Smart, Watchmen

Outstanding reality competition series

• The Masked Singer
• Nailed It
• WINNER: RuPaul's Drag Race
• Top Chef
• The Voice

Outstanding variety talk series

• Daily Show with Trevor Noah
• Full Frontal with Samantha Bee
• Jimmy Kimmel Live
• WINNER: Last Week Tonight with John Oliver
• Late Show with Stephen Colbert

Outstanding variety sketch series

• A Black Lady Sketch Show
• Drunk History
• WINNER: Saturday Night Live

Outstanding Television movie

• American Son
• WINNER: Bad Education
• Dolly Parton's Heartstrings: These Old Bones
• El Camino: A Breaking Bad Movie
• Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt: Kimmy vs. The Reverend

Writing for a comedy series

• WINNER: Daniel Levy, Schitt's Creek
• David West Read, Schitt's Creek
• Michael Schur, The Good Place
• Tony McNamara, The Great
• Sam Johnson and Chris Marcil, What We Do In The Shadows
• Paul Simms, What We Do In The Shadows
• Stefani Robinson, What We Do In The Shadows

Writing for a drama series

• Thomas Schnauz, Better Call Saul
• Thomas Schnauz,
• Gordon Smith, Better Call Saul
• Peter Morgan, The Crown
• Chris Mundy, Ozark
• John Shiban, Ozark
• Miki Johnso, Ozark
• WINNER: Jesse Armstrong, Succession

Writing for a limited series, movie or drama

• Tanya Barfield, Mrs. America
• Sally Rooney and Alice Birch, Normal People
• Susannah Grant, Ayelet Waldman and Michael Chabon, Unbelievable
• Anna Winger, Unorthodox
• WINNER: Damon Lindelof and Cord Jefferson, Watchmen

Director for a comedy series

• Matt Shakman, The Great
• Amy Sherman-Palladino, The Marvelous Mrs. Maisel
• Daniel Palladino, The Marvelous Mrs. Maisel
• Gail Mancuso, Modern Family • Finale Part 2
• Ramy Youssef, Ramy
• WINNER: Andrew Cividino and Daniel Levy, Schitt's Creek
• James Burrows, Will & Grace

Directing for a drama series

• Benjamin Caron, The Crown
• Jessica Hobbs, The Crown
• Lesli Linka Glatter, Homeland
• Mimi Leder, The Morning Show Mimi Leder,
• Alik Sakharov, Ozark
• Ben Semanoff, Ozark
• WINNER: Andrij Parekh, Succession
• Mark Mylod, Succession

Directing for a limited series

• Lynn Shelton, Little Fires Everywhere
• Lenny Abrahamson, Normal People
• WINNER: Maria Schrader, Unorthodox
• Nicole Kassell, Watchmen
• Steph Green, Watchmen
• Stephen Williams, Watchmen

ENOLA HOLMES 
Release Date: 2020
Rating: M
Running Time: 123 mins 
A crime/mystery period film based on the first book in the series of the same name by Nancy Springer which focuses on the adventures of Enola Holmes, teenage sister of already famous crime investigator Sherlock Holmes. Enola Holmes was distributed by Netflix streaming services when they acquired the rights for distribution from Warner Bros. because of the COVID-19 pandemic. 
Raised to be carefree and headstrong by her free spirited mother, teenager Enola Holmes becomes distressed when her mother goes missing in the middle of the night without explanation. An attempt to enlist the help of her two older brothers Sherlock and Mycroft proves disastrous, so Enola takes matters into her own hands and sets off to discover what happened to her mother for herself. 
I cannot deny that Millie Bobby Brown breathes some much needed fresh air into Baker Street with her effervescent and energic portrayal of Enola and she is definitely what makes this movie so delightful and enjoyable. She is however extremely well supported by Henry Cavill as Sherlock, Sam Claflin as Mycroft and Helena Bonham Carter as the mother of them all Eudoria Holmes. 
There is an infectious and intoxicating teenage energy to this movie that I really loved and I do hope that we will get to see further instalments of this series in the future. 
FINAL SAY: Sometimes you must dangle your feet in the water in order to attract the sharks. 
3.5 Chilli Peppers ​

When it comes to taking care of ourselves and not getting smashed on the shores of real life events, introverts can often be quite inept at listening to their inner voice and stepping back before reaching burn out or fever pitch. There is nothing worse than dealing with an introvert that has been ignoring their inner voice that has been telling them to slow down and take a break, it can start to feel a lot like you're reasoning with Jake LaMotta from the movie Raging Bull and it isn't fun for anyone involved. 
Where extroverts get energy from other people and feel down if they are left alone for long periods, introverts work at the polar opposite end of that scale and require regular alone time in order to feel grounded and centred. 
For that reason I have compiled a list of the best self care strategies that I use to sate my need for alone time and quench my introverted feelings of overwhelment and frustration. If you too, like me are an introvert then hopefully you will find this list helpful when you find yourself in need of little self care and t.l.c. 
1. STOP!
And I don't just mean sit down for 5 minutes, I mean fully and completely stop. All devices, distractions and external noises turned off. You need to be completely alone and uninterrupted for 10 solid minutes. If you are at work or in a public space you may need to seek out a spot to make this happen (even your car can be an option if all else fails), but wherever you are, you have to find a way to make it possible to be alone and switch off completely. Think of yourself like a iphone that needs recharging, you have to find a power outlet and plug in - you're giving yourself the recharge that you need to get through the day - it's valuable and vital - especially if you are the type of introvert that is prone to burnout. 
2. DO SOMETHING CREATIVE
Nothing soothes a messy mind like putting something down on paper. Colour a mindful colouring book, doodle, paint, sketch, write in a journal or if you are really crafty make something more 3D with your hands. Paper crafts, sculpting, jewellery making, knitting, crocheting, sewing, making bread or even playing an instrument have been scientifically proven to release stress reducing endorphins. You will not only produce something handmade and awesome but will also allow the introvert in you to tune out from external input and reboot your system. 
3. NANNA NAP 
Nothing recharges a weary mind like a good nap. If you are fortunate enough to take a 30-40 minute nanna nap on the weekend or even squeeze a 20 minute afternoon reboot into your weekday routine, then do it! You're definitely going to be glad that you did because a half hour sleep in the afternoon has also been scientifically proven to boost emotional, physical and mental capabilities. Old people swear by it and little people can't function without it, so why not treat yourself to a nanna nap more often? 
4. WALK IT OFF
Get your feel good endorphins kicking with a nice easy walk around a park. I am not talking about a power walk here, I am talking about a casual meander through the local gardens, somewhere that you can literally stop and smell the flowers, take in a little sunshine and breathe in some good fresh air. If walking is not your bag, that's fine too, you could also try yoga, Tai Chi or gentle swimming. Make it more about the journey rather than the steps on the pedometer. 
5. READ
Everyone knows that I am a huge advocate of getting lost between the pages of a good book for a couple of hours when you can and it is not just about being immersed in a great story but also about the stress reducing and long term health benefits around reading. Reading is so damn good for you; it increases your intelligence, memory and general IQ  and next to meditation it is the most effective way to stimulate your mind without the need for movement or chemicals. Introverts get reading now - it's a brilliant way to detox and reboot. 
6. TOUCHY FEELY
No I don't mean going off to have a bit of rumpy-pumpy, but if that's what get you feeling good then so be it, by all means have at that too. What I was actually referring to was using your sense of touch to diffuse your introvert anxieties. The best ways to do this are to engage in mellow and releasing touch stimulations like petting your cat or dog, taking a bubble bath, having a massage, having a long hot shower or putting on your favourite comfy clothes or PJ's and snuggling under a soft blanket. Physical touch release actually works really well for introverts and if you haven't tried this method of self soothing yet, I would definitely urge you to do so. 

​And there you have it, six sure fire ways for any introvert to defuse their anger, reverse their exhaustion and reboot their systems. Make some time for your introverted self and take care of your wellbeing, because nobody likes a tired, grumpy or intolerant introvert; so save us all from the Raging Bull antics and be kind to yourself!

RAGING BULL
Release Date: 1980
Rating: MA 15+
Running Time: 129 mins
Martin Scorsese and Robert De Niro are truly a winning combination and Raging Bull is certainly testament to that fact. Considered one of the best films to have been made in the 1980's, Raging Bull was clearly ahead of it's time. Shot in moody black and white, this is certainly not like any other sports drama that had been made at the time; and the script works hard to disclose the barbaric and brutal realities of boxing as a sport, with a stellar and clearly physically demanding performance from De Niro. 
Jake LaMotta is a middleweight boxer that has fought his way to the top and refuses to go down for anyone. His obsessions and delusions soon reveal him to be an unstable, jealous and volatile man that will stop at nothing to keep his stranglehold on his boxing title and his beautiful wife. 
Joe Pesci plays Joey, LaMotta's brother and well-intentioned manager with lots of heart, and Cathy Moriarty does a fabulous job of portraying Vickie, LaMotta's long enduring wife; but in essence this is De Niro's movie from start to end. He gained an incredible 27kgs to portray Jake LaMotta in his post boxing days, making him almost unrecognizable and there wasn't a moment during the film that I didn't find him terrifyingly unhinged. 
FINAL SAY: So give me a stage where this bull can rage....
3.5 Chilli Peppers ​

Amidst the confusion and calamity of COVID-19, America manages to throw itself even further into turmoil with thousands of people taking to the streets in protest of the brutal murder of George Floyd, a 46 year old black man who died in police custody in May. Poor Floyd can clearly be seen in a viral Youtube video being suffocated to death by a police officer who has his knee forced into Floyd's throat as he gasps and pleads 'I can't breathe' - but they do not show any mercy, and he dies because of a cruel and corrupt American authority system that feels entitled to use inhumane force and reckless violence against its citizens. 
As the world watched in horror, the American public completely broke over this latest demonstration of societal inequality and they rose up in anger. Some chose to peacefully demonstrate, others used more force and in some cases stores were looted and protesters were brutally attacked in scenes that felt more like they belonged in a post-apocalyptic movie rather than on the streets of a first world country. 
And although it would appear that this is all due to George Floyd death, in reality although clearly awful, Floyd's death was merely the straw the broke the very overburdened backs of the American people. George Floyd was a spark in a powder keg of disgruntled, beaten down and fed up citizens that had finally had enough of the oppression and sheer disregard of their welfare by the leaders and law enforcement of their country, the very people who are supposed to be serving and protecting them. Between the coronavirus, the record levels of unemployment and the years and years of African American deaths and criminal frame ups from the police, this mass protest was well overdue. 
So Trump has truly made his bed, his very ugly bed and now he must lie down in it. Do I feel sorry for him? Of course I don't, and even though I would never advocate anarchy in the streets I cannot help but feel like this latest outpouring of anger and demonstration from the people of America is more than warranted and seriously overdue. The dragging down, the corruption and the maldistribution of support and care in that country simply has to stop, and if that means taking it to the streets and getting loud about it, well so be it I say.
I just hope that they will take this fervent energy with them to the polling booths at the next election and start to show more care for who they elect to speak for them in the future because there is only way that any of this is going to change and that's by cutting the head off the beast itself. Donald Trump has proven himself to be nothing short of psychopathic since the whole COVID-19 pandemic began, and when he isn't advising his people to go out and drink bleach as a Coronavirus preventative, he is generally otherwise busy inciting fear, promoting corruption and generally acting like a bible swinging lunatic. If this doesn't get the Americans rallied together to vote him out, then nothing will now. 
This latest uprising around George Floyd, I believe is just the beginning. In 1967 Dr Martin Luther King, Jr. called for a 'revolution of values' because of the continuous cycle of social inequity and police brutality that the African Americans were enduring, and this form of civil rights movement is beginning to come into play again today. Fairness and justice are worth fighting for and now that the American people have gained some momentum and worldwide attention and support they will not be going quietly into the night with this, they are going to keep this momentum going and they are going to make changes.
A time of revolution is most definitely upon us, not just upon the Americans, but upon us all. What we are all witnessing right now is an extremely significant and important time in history, a time that you will talk about with your families for years to come, a time when all of the oppressors will be held accountable for their choices and democracy shall prevail. It's the start of something big and extremely overdue, so bring on the revolution I say, you have my full support. No-one in this world should have to fight for equitable treatment, it should just occur and I look forward to the abolition of all of these barbaric, archaic and unwanted behaviours, let's make the assholes accountable! Viva La Revolution! Power to the People! But most of all, watch this space because things are going to change and it will be wonderful to see the people win and the bad guys all finally get their comeuppances. 

Another Mother's Day rolls around and offers all of the mothers of the world a little time to reflect on their own relationships with their mother and their children. For as long as I can remember, I always wanted to be a mother and have children of my own, I never imagined that I wouldn't have kids one day. And that was certainly not because of any external pressures or expectations that I felt to have them, I just really wanted to have children because in all honesty, I have always really liked children.
Generally, I find children to be quite fascinating and often interesting to be around. Sure they can be like drunk adults with all of their brutal honesty, random vomiting and shitty coping skills but let's face it, when they are at their best little kids are just plain adorable. However, for the ultimate ego booster, there is nothing quite like seeing your own children all grown up, especially when they are bloody amazing and inspiring to be around; it really does put the icing on the motherhood cake. 
And I have to say, my children have actually been two of the best teachers that I have ever had in my life because I have learned more about myself and how to deal with others through them that I have learned through anyone else and that is probably the biggest plus to motherhood of all. In fact now that I think about it, my children have taught me about a lot of things that I doubt that I would have mastered as well as I have without their help along way. 
Firstly, I have completely gotten 'over' the preciousness of my physical self since I have become a mum. There is nothing like pregnancy, labour and the consequences of those two things combined to help you to get over the state of your physical body. Stretch marks, saggy boobs, flabby tummy, crappy uterus? Who cares? The physicalities are a mere blip on the radar of motherhood. Things that would have bothered me immensely about my body prior to having children are in the 'could not give a shit' basket now. Had one visit to the labour ward? Well then you've had them all and after a couple of dozen people have looked up your clacker and half of them have had their hand in there, well you just don't really care as much about stuff like that anymore. The old 'my home is your home' saying, is more like 'my body is everyone's body' after becoming a mum and you just can't afford to get hung up about it or you'll become a raving loony, so you just learn to let go and go with it.
My children have also taught me that it's okay to make mistakes and to not be perfect. Every new mother wants to be the perfect mother, but the perfect mother doesn't exist and trying to be one will just make you tired, frustrated and miserable. I have learnt that doing the best that I can with what I have is enough and apologising when I fuck it all up has worked an absolute treat for me. I have become so comfortable with my imperfections as a mum that I can now say to my children without any shame - 'I'm sorry and I wish I had handled that better' or 'I know that I am not at my best and I am sorry for that.' And they are fine with that, they don't expect me to get it right all the time, just like I don't expect them to, so I suppose that I have learned to accept imperfection as a kind of perfection in itself and that's something pretty amazing that motherhood has given to me. 
I have also learned incredible patience, unusual kindness and intense levels of overwhelming pride and gratitude from my children that nothing else in the world has ever given me. I have discovered that I am not the centre of the universe, although sometimes I still want to be. I have learned that my children need to be their own people, do their own things and be with people of their own choice and it has nothing to do with me whatsoever, and that is a relinquishing of power and control that I have mastered thanks to my children.  
I have learned that losing is not actually losing, it's learning. I have learned that most things don't require my comment or input at all and I have learned to pick my battles wisely and with great forethought (aka I no longer shoot from the hip) which I thank my children for assisting me with.
I have learned so many important and valuable things from my beautiful and wonderful children and I can say without a word of doubt that being a mother has made me a better person, a better wife, a better friend and a better daughter to my own mother as well. I'd be lying if I said that it has all been easy, but it has all been interesting and rewarding like nothing else that I have ever done before. And I have to say, damn I'm glad that I have experienced being a mother in this lifetime, what a genuine pleasure it has really been. 

Without a doubt, the whole self isolation experience has offered us all a little more time to really explore the way that we feel about things, and also ourselves. I have spent more time in meditation and have also reflected on the types of spaces that I have created for myself. Some of the spaces that I have made for myself are harmonious, peaceful and nurturing, and unfortunately some of them are limiting, negative and even at times quite toxic. And I suppose that we are all a little guilty of having unpleasant thoughts about ourselves from time to time, but there is a pretty big difference between having a fleeting insecure thought about who you are and clothing and feeding your demons on a daily basis. And that's why it's important to explore the things that you say to yourself regularly and investigate more positive self talk thoughts that you can employ to ensure that you aren't cultivating toxic self hating thoughts about who you really are. 
Long gone are the days when self love was considered to be vain or selfish because anyone with half a brain knows that RuPaul hit that nail right on the head with his 'if you can't love yourself, how in the hell you gonna love someone else?' statement. And it's true, you deserve to love you and you deserve to be proud, secure and content with who you are, but getting rid of toxic thought patterns and culling old mindsets can be challenging and it does require a certain shedding of an old and outmoded way of being that requires you first to take a good look at exactly what it is that you have been saying to yourself about who you are.
A lot of what we believe about ourselves actually derives from our upbringing, our relationships and even the media, which is really sad because we don't even get to decide for ourselves who we are. All of our lives we have been constantly bombarded by people putting ideas into our heads about who we are, or who we are supposed to be; and most of those concepts are actually completely untrue. Who we truly are is whomever we choose to be. How we look and feel is completely is up to us as well, and just knowing that is the first step to empowering yourself to develop better and more positive thoughts about who you are. 
A while ago I wrote a blog post called Self Talk, and it explored my own struggles with negative self beliefs and toxic thought patterns. I have since managed to get those thoughts mostly under control by sticking to these five big self check in questions whenever they arise:

• Is there any evidence to support this thought I'm having about myself?
• What would I say to a friend if they were saying these things about themselves?
• Is there a positive way to look at this?
• Is this thought or feeling rational? Is it mine? Or has been planted or programmed into me externally?
• What can I do to change this feeling or thought that I have about myself? 

It is vitally important to remember that you are not here to fill a mold, fulfill a pre-designed role or be anyone that you do not desire to be for yourself. It is not your job to manage the thoughts that others may have about you and it is not your problem if other people are holding on to outmoded, archaic or toxic thoughts themselves or about who they think you should be or what they expect from you. You can only ever be responsible for your own thoughts and feelings and you do deserve to feel good about yourself. 
During these times of deep self reflection and thought, it's good to toss a little extra self love in to your routine just for good measure. So here are some really great ways to build your self esteem, remove negative beliefs and thoughts about yourself and adopt a kinder mindset for yourself in some very simple and gentle ways.

• Forgiveness- forgive yourself for the mistakes that you've made in the past and forgive others for theirs. There is no going back so let it go and make more room for positive thoughts and feelings in your life. 
• Mindfulness - be mindful about all of the things that you have in your life and practise gratitude. Write down three great things that happened or three positive things about yourself everyday. 
• Acceptance- accept that we are all different and unique. Try to enjoy the beauty and diversity that individuality brings to your life and accept your own uniqueness as part of that. Don't be influenced about your appearance by the media or narrow minded people. 
• Nurturing - do kind things for yourself. Spoil yourself and treat yourself with care and respect. It's good to love yourself, learn to make that your mantra. 
• Avoidance - take stock of who you spend your time with and what you spend your time doing. Steer clear of negative or toxic people or influences that may attempt to bring you down. Spend your time with people that uplift, appreciate, motivate and inspire you. 
• Positivity - Say positive things, think positive thoughts and stop complaining. Focus on the good and you will start to see more of it around you and within you.  Say something positive to yourself about who you are everyday. 
• Giving - Support others and yourself by demonstrating kindness. Give more time and patience to those around you and to yourself and be extremely demonstrative of that. Find unique ways to give and be generous. 
• Believing - believe that you are completely worthy of love and care just as much as anyone else in the world. Believe in your best virtues and focus your thoughts on your best qualities so that you can shine them out into the world. 

God knows that I love to have the last word, probably to my own detriment most of the time. Every time that I hear Annie Lennox singing that song 'Why?' when she reaches that line 'I tell myself too many times why don't you ever learn to keep your big mouth shut?' I shudder as it stings me with its complete accuracy. Yep, sometimes I know that I say far more than what is necessary. In fact I'm pretty sure that if I have any guiding spirits, that they would probably be face palming themselves behind my back regularly. It's true; I do have to own that in the heat of the moment I have been known to throw out some pretty unnecessary words and I'm not going to pretend that I am proud of that because I am not. Losing your shit and saying more than what is necessary is never a good thing and only an idiot would ever defend that kind of behaviour. 
It really is a massive problem having a big gob like I do and saying too much, and the worst part of all is that you can't take any of it back. Words can never be unsaid, rewound, unravelled or removed once they have been spoken, and sometimes the fallout of their impact can never be undone either. I have learnt over the years that it is far better to just say nothing at all than to say something mean, unkind or inappropriate. 
And it was in the spirit of last words that I started pondering about what I would say if I knew that it was the very last thing that I  would ever say in my lifetime. And before you start thinking that I have too much time on my hands (which I clearly do) it turns out that a lot of other people have thought about this as well because there is a huge list of famous people's last words on the internet (if you can believe that they are really true that is). Mind you some of them aren't actually the person's last words, they're just the last thing that they were ever heard saying, so their real last words were probably something more like 'Oh fuck I'm actually dying!' and we would never really know. Nevertheless here are a couple of rippers that I really enjoyed reading:

• Frank Sinatra - I'm losing it. 
• Margaret Sanger (Birth Control advocate) - A party, let's have a party!
• Nostradamus - Tomorrow, at sunrise, I shall no longer be here. 
• Leonardo da Vinci - I have offended god and mankind because my work did not reach the quality it should have.
• Richard Feynman - This dying is boring. 
• Sir Arthur Conan Doyle - (to his wife)  You are wonderful.
• Michael Landon - You're right, its time. I love you all.
• Eugene O'Neill - I knew it! I knew it! Born in a hotel room and goddamnit, dying in a hotel room.
• Jack Soo - It must've been the coffee. 
• Groucho Marx - This is no way to live. 
• Emily Dickinson - I must go in, for the fog is rising. 
• James Brown - I'm going away tonight.
• Steve Jobs - Oh wow. Oh wow. Oh wow. 

In all seriousness though, it is absolutely impossible to determine what your own last words might be, because who knows how you'll go in the end? I would imagine that what you would say on your deathbed surrounded by loved ones would be quite different to what you might say if you were mowed down in the street by a bus. However, I would hope that my last words were something more like 'oh it's even more wonderful than I could've imagined' and a lot less like  'oh so that's what Satan looks like.'
However, the chances of actually formulating something exceptional, memorable or poignant on your deathbed are honestly extremely unlikely, so my best advice is that if you've got something really important to say then I think that you owe it to world to say it well before the day that you actually leave. As long as it's nice!  Just saying!

The 92nd Academy Awards aired on Monday and of course I was glued to the television for the duration. I love all of the glitz and glamour and particularly enjoyed the brilliant opening routine which gave homage to some of the excellent movies of 2019 that didn't make the final nomination cut like Us, Midsommar, Queen and Slim and Dolemite is My Name. 
I cannot express my joy at seeing the floral 'Midsommar' dress on Janelle Monae as she declared "Tonight, we celebrate all the amazing talent in this room. We celebrate all of the women who directed phenomenal films and I'm so proud to stand here as a black queer artist, telling stories. Happy Black History Month." 
And what a wonderful night it was all around with Parasite smashing it out of the park with four Oscar wins, including Best Picture, Director, Original Screenplay and Best International Feature Film. Turns out that when the South Koreans arrive at the Academy Awards, they mop the floors with their opponents. And good for them, Parasite was easily one of the best movies of 2019, and I for one have been advocating for more foreign film appreciation for decades, so it's about time really.
Now we just need another female to win a Best Director Oscar because that hasn't happened since Kathryn Bigelow broke the mould and won one in 2010 for The Hurt Locker, and it's been a mighty dry category for females ever since as well; here's hoping 2020 will change all that again. 
However, enough of my own agenda, let's just get onto the very worthy Oscar winners for 2019, my congratulations and sincere appreciation to you all!
Best Picture:
“Parasite”
Lead Actor:
Joaquin Phoenix, “Joker”
Lead Actress:
Renee Zellweger, “Judy”
Supporting Actor:
Brad Pitt, “Once Upon a Time in Hollywood”
Supporting Actress:
Laura Dern, “Marriage Story”
Director:
Bong Joon Ho, “Parasite”
Animated Feature:
“Toy Story 4,”  Josh Cooley
Animated Short:
“Hair Love,” Matthew A. Cherry
Adapted Screenplay:
“Jojo Rabbit,” Taika Waititi
Original Screenplay:
“Parasite,” Bong Joon-ho, Jin Won Han
Cinematography:
“1917,” Roger Deakins
Best Documentary Feature:
“American Factory,” Julia Riechert, Steven Bognar
Best Documentary Short Subject:
“Learning to Skateboard in a Warzone,” Carol Dysinger
Best Live Action Short Film:
“The Neighbors’ Window,” Marshall Curry
Best International Feature Film:
“Parasite,” Bong Joon Ho
Film Editing:
“Ford v Ferrari,” Michael McCusker, Andrew Buckland
Sound Editing:
“Ford v Ferrari,” Don Sylvester
Sound Mixing:
“1917” Stuart Wilson
Production Design:
“Once Upon a Time in Hollywood,” Barbara Ling and Nancy Haigh
Original Score:
“Joker,” Hildur Guðnadóttir
Original Song:
“I’m Gonna Love Me Again,” “Rocketman”
Makeup and Hair:
“Bombshell” Kazuhiro Tsuji
Costume Design:
“Little Women,” Jacqueline Durran
Visual Effects:
“1917” Guillaume Rocheron, Dominic Tuchy, Greg Butler.

I have in other posts mentioned how I hate it when a movie franchise capitalises on the success of earlier films and starts to roll out endless sequels that are just absolute shit and not a scrap on the original in any way, and look this does happen quite a lot. However, I don't want to tell you about all of the times that Hollywood wasted my time with shithouse sequels, why would I do that when I can tell you about all of the times when they actually got it completely right?
I would much prefer to talk about all of the times that a sequel or trilogy produced something that was just as good as the original - and dare I say it, sometimes even better! Yes, it is true, that some sequels and sometimes trilogies (and even beyond; which is rare but has happened) can be just as good, if not better than, their predecessor offerings. And I have to say that I get mighty excited when things like this happen.
Whenever I enter the cinema to watch a second coming I never, not ever, expect for it to be great. So you can imagine my surprise and delight when they get the formula right and deliver something fabulous all over again. Impossible you say? I think not, check out these incredible feats of cinematic trilogy and sequel genius -no seriously, you should really check them out, they're actually all very good movies!
TERRIFIC TRILOGIES:

• The Godfather: Arguably the best movie trilogy that has ever been made and certainly one of the best that I've ever seen.
• Toy Story: All four of them are great, all four of them! This is so rare that it is literally unheard of. If you've somehow missed these, see them immediately. 
• Lord Of The Rings (Trilogy): I've said it a thousand times, these three movies are epic. All Hale King Jackson! 
• The Hobbit(Trilogy): More Jackson gold, not as good as LOTR, but still epic.
• John Wick: There have been three of these so far, and they just keep getting better and better, and Keanu gets sexier and sexier as well - bonus!
• The Indiana Jones trilogy: Yeah I know that there were four of them, but the first three were the best and you know it too!
• Before Midnight: The final film in the trilogy, with the first two being Before Sunrise and Before Sunset. These are some of the best and most realistic romance films ever made, and each installment gets more involved. 
• Three Colours: Blue, Red and White: These fabulous french/polish language films are loosely based on the three political ideals in the motto of the French republic: liberty, equality, fraternity, and they're all excellent. 

STUNNING SEQUELS: 

• Terminator 2: Judgement Day: The first one was great, but the second one was bad ass, CGI effects heaven in 1991. 
• Aliens: Yep, loved the original Alien with all of my heart, but kick ass Ripley saving the day in Aliens was so damn good!
• Blade Runner 2049: So good, and in my opinion better than the original in storyline. 
• Paddington 2: Probably the best sequel of 2017, it was just so damn adorable!
• The Dark Knight: Heath Ledger's performance elevated the Batman movies to new and great heights- amazing!
• Thor: Ragnarok: Funnier, faster and way more enjoyable than any of the other Thor films. 
• Logan: The Wolverine franchise swan song was so, so good - it made my best of 2017 film list because it's really intelligent and deeply moving.
• Insidious 2: A perfect follow up to the very creepy first offering, some consistently excellent horror film making here. 
• Deadpool 2 - I love the Deadpool movies, they are so naughty and tongue in cheek, they're winners all round for me.
• Creep 2 - More Mark Duplass weirdness! Creep 2 is a really good and consistent follow on to the first Creep film. 
• Kill Bill Vol 2 - Every bit as good as Kill Bill vol 1, I actually liked the second instalment more than the first, but I know that many would argue this with me. 
• Hellboy 2 - The Golden Army: Even better than the first Hellboy, loads more fantastic creatures and heaps of action packed fun. 
• Manon Des Sources: The second installment of the French language movie Jean De Florette is unforgettable material that shouldn't be missed. 
• Avengers: Endgame: A perfect ending to an incredible franchise and the best super sequel that has ever been made. Hall of Fame material!
• Mad Max: Fury Road: This modern take on Mad Max was an unmissable fuel injected adrenaline rush and made my best of 2015 list. 
• T2 Trainspotting: A mature and contemplative revisit to the lads twenty years on, very interesting. 
• The Conjuring 2 - The Enfield Haunting: Totally freaked me out, that bloody nun is scary as all shit! Way more scares than the first Conjuring offering. 
• The Guardians of the Galaxy Vol 2: Just as good as Vol 1 in every way, just as funny, action packed and entertaining. 
• An Inconvenient Sequel: Truth to Power: If you're still in denial about global warming then watch Al Gore's second offering about the subject and get on board with feeling very uncomfortable and worried about the planet. 
• Zombieland: Double Tap: More hack and slash zombie killing with the old gang, what's not to like? 

The Academy Awards (or Oscars) are officially Hollywood's biggest awards 'night of nights.' They serve to award movie makers, directors and actors who have reached a pinnacle of excellence in their careers. To even receive an Oscar nomination is huge deal in Hollywood, and unlike the Golden Globes that celebrate television and film excellence, the Academy Awards are solely focused on recognising achievements of excellence in film.
The categories at the Oscars span much further than acting and directing, and also offer recognition for all of the creative and technical work that goes on behind the scenes when movies are made. From costuming, sound, cinematography, visual effects and cinema shorts, the Academy Awards are the most prestigious and coveted of all of the Hollywood award events, and even though I never miss the Golden Globes, the Screen Actors Guild Awards or the Critics Choice Awards, the Oscars are easily my favourite awards ceremony to watch every year. 
If you should wish to see the Academy Awards ceremony yourself this year, it will be broadcasting live on Channel Seven from 12pm on Monday 10th February, with an encore airing at 7.30pm for those of you who, like myself, will be at work during the day of the ceremony. 
And this year, the Academy Award nominees are as follows:
Best Picture:
“Ford v Ferrari”
“The Irishman”
“Jojo Rabbit”
“Joker”
“Little Women”
“Marriage Story”
“1917”
“Once Upon a Time in Hollywood”
“Parasite”
Lead Actor:
Antonio Banderas, “Pain and Glory”
Leonardo DiCaprio, “Once Upon a Time in Hollywood”
Adam Driver, “Marriage Story”
Joaquin Phoenix, “Joker”
Jonathan Pryce, “The Two Popes”
Lead Actress:
Cynthia Erivo, “Harriet”
Scarlett Johansson, “Marriage Story”
Saoirse Ronan, “Little Women”
Charlize Theron, “Bombshell”
Renee Zellweger, “Judy”
Supporting Actor:
Tom Hanks, “A Beautiful Day in the Neighborhood”
Anthony Hopkins, “The Two Popes”
Al Pacino, “The Irishman”
Joe Pesci, “The Irishman”
Brad Pitt, “Once Upon a Time in Hollywood”
Supporting Actress:
Kathy Bates, “Richard Jewell”
Laura Dern, “Marriage Story”
Scarlett Johansson, “Jojo Rabbit”
Florence Pugh, “Little Women”
Margot Robbie, “Bombshell”
Director:
Martin Scorsese, “The Irishman”
Todd Phillips, “Joker”
Sam Mendes, “1917”
Quentin Tarantino, “Once Upon a Time in Hollywood”
Bong Joon Ho, “Parasite”
Animated Feature:
“How to Train Your Dragon: The Hidden World,” Dean DeBlois
“I Lost My Body,” Jeremy Clapin
“Klaus,” Sergio Pablos
“Missing Link,” Chris Butler
“Toy Story 4,”  Josh Cooley
Animated Short:
“Dcera,” Daria Kashcheeva
“Hair Love,” Matthew A. Cherry
“Kitbull,” Rosana Sullivan
“Memorable,” Bruno Collet
“Sister,” Siqi Song
Adapted Screenplay:
“The Irishman,” Steven Zaillian
“Jojo Rabbit,” Taika Waititi
“Joker,” Todd Phillips, Scott Silver
“Little Women,” Greta Gerwig
“The Two Popes,” Anthony McCarten
Original Screenplay:
“Knives Out,” Rian Johnson
“Marriage Story,” Noah Baumbach
“1917,” Sam Mendes and Krysty Wilson-Cairns
“Once Upon a Time in Hollywood,” Quentin Tarantino
“Parasite,” Bong Joon-ho, Jin Won Han
Cinematography:
“The Irishman,” Rodrigo Prieto
“Joker,” Lawrence Sher
“The Lighthouse,” Jarin Blaschke
“1917,” Roger Deakins
“Once Upon a Time in Hollywood,” Robert Richardson
Best Documentary Feature:
“American Factory,” Julia Rieichert, Steven Bognar
“The Cave,” Feras Fayyad
“The Edge of Democracy,” Petra Costa
“For Sama,” Waad Al-Kateab, Edward Watts
“Honeyland,” Tamara Kotevska, Ljubo Stefanov
Best Documentary Short Subject:
“In the Absence,” Yi Seung-Jun and Gary Byung-Seok Kam
“Learning to Skateboard in a Warzone,” Carol Dysinger
“Life Overtakes Me,” Kristine Samuelson and John Haptas
“St. Louis Superman,” Smriti Mundhra and Sami Khan
“Walk Run Cha-Cha,” Laura Nix
Best Live Action Short Film:
“Brotherhood,” Meryam Joobeur
“Nefta Football Club,” Yves Piat
“The Neighbors’ Window,” Marshall Curry
“Saria,” Bryan Buckley
“A Sister,” Delphine Girard
Best International Feature Film:
“Corpus Christi,” Jan Komasa
“Honeyland,” Tamara Kotevska, Ljubo Stefanov
“Les Miserables,” Ladj Ly
“Pain and Glory,” Pedro Almodovar
“Parasite,” Bong Joon Ho
Film Editing:
“Ford v Ferrari,” Michael McCusker, Andrew Buckland
“The Irishman,” Thelma Schoonmaker
“Jojo Rabbit,” Tom Eagles
“Joker,” Jeff Groth
“Parasite,” Jinmo Yang
Sound Editing:
“Ford v Ferrari,” Don Sylvester
“Joker,” Alan Robert Murray
“1917,” Oliver Tarney, Rachel Tate
“Once Upon a Time in Hollywood,” Wylie Stateman
“Star Wars: The Rise of SkyWalker,” Matthew Wood, David Acord
Sound Mixing:
“Ad Astra”
“Ford v Ferrari”
“Joker”
“1917”
“Once Upon a Time in Hollywood”
Production Design:
“The Irishman,” Bob Shaw and Regina Graves
“Jojo Rabbit,” Ra Vincent and Nora Sopkova
“1917,” Dennis Gassner and Lee Sandales
“Once Upon a Time in Hollywood,” Barbara Ling and Nancy Haigh
“Parasite,” Lee Ha-Jun and Cho Won Woo, Han Ga Ram, and Cho Hee
Original Score:
“Joker,” Hildur Guðnadóttir
“Little Women,” Alexandre Desplat
“Marriage Story,” Randy Newman
“1917,” Thomas Newman
“Star Wars: The Rise of Skywalker,” John Williams
Original Song:
“I Can’t Let You Throw Yourself Away,” “Toy Story 4”
“I’m Gonna Love Me Again,” “Rocketman”
“I’m Standing With You,” “Breakthrough”
“Into the Unknown,” “Frozen 2”
“Stand Up,” “Harriet”
Makeup and Hair:
“Bombshell”
“Joker”
“Judy”
“Maleficent: Mistress of Evil”
“1917”
Costume Design:
”The Irishman,” Sandy Powell, Christopher Peterson
“Jojo Rabbit,” Mayes C. Rubeo
“Joker,” Mark Bridges
“Little Women,” Jacqueline Durran
“Once Upon a Time in Hollywood,” Arianne Phillips
Visual Effects:
“Avengers Endgame”
“The Irishman”
“1917”
“The Lion King”
“Star Wars: The Rise of Skywalker”

Here's a shout out to all of the directors that have given me a memorable viewing experience at some point in my lifetime. This list is designed to give credit to my favourite director's work and offer homage to their incredible efforts. I have also cited my favourite movie offering from each director as well, just in case you wanted to know where I thought that they had put down their best work thus far. 
What made me really happy when I was compiling this list was just how varied, vast and interesting the styles of direction are that I have been fortunate enough to experience, but what made me really sad was the lack of female directors that made this list. Clearly, the role of director is still a very male dominated field in Hollywood. I did happen to notice that all of the best movie nominations at the Golden Globes this year were all for male directors. And the saddest thing of all about this is, that it is not at all indicative of female directorial ability or talent in any way, shape or form, what it is indicative of is the lack of opportunities for upcoming female directors, and that is something that really needs to change.
Some of the best movies and television programs that I have seen over the last few years were both written and directed by women. Women have incredible and engaging stories to tell both in front of and behind the camera, and I for one would like to see more of them in the future. So, please make sure that you too are making an effort to see more movies that have been directed women in a show of support for all of the female directing pioneers that are out there telling their stories and sharing their visions in a very male dominated industry. 
So without any further ado, here are my favourite movie directors (in no particular order other than my recall ability) and my favourite movies that they have brought to life on screen. 
David Lynch - A true visionary in every sense, he's the man behind Twin Peaks, Blue Velvet, The Elephant Man and Eraserhead. Lynch is known for his surrealist cinema stylings and deeply original point of view.
BEST MOVIE: Mulholland Drive
Wes Anderson - The king of quirk with a distinct visual style and amusing narrative. He's delivered gems like The Royal Tenenbaums, Moonrise Kingdom and The Grand Budapest Hotel and has produced two incredible stop motion children's animations as well, one of which is on my Hall of Fame.
BEST MOVIE: Fantastic Mr Fox
Lars von Trier- A Danish director and scriptwriter that has had a long and controversial career. Basically he seems to enjoy destroying beautiful things in all of his films, which are gritty and damning. He's responsible for Nymphomaniac, Antichrist, Dancer in the Dark and Dogville, which all left a mark on me. 
BEST MOVIE: Melancholia
Jason Reitman - Reitman seems to 'get' women and understand difficult relationship dynamics, and his films certainly portray that knowledge. He brought us Juno, Up in the Air, Tully and Young Adult which were all exceptionally good. 
BEST MOVIE: Labor Day 
Taika Waititi - A clever New Zealand comedy filmmaker who always seems to get the right balance between poignancy and laughs in his films. He's the funny guy behind Moana (he wrote the first screenplay), What We Do in the Shadows, Eagle vs Shark, Boy and most recently Jojo Rabbit. 
BEST MOVIE: Hunt for the Wilderpeople
Peter Jackson - Jackson is responsible for all of the journeys that I took in darkened cinemas to Middle Earth, I bloody love ya Peter! Besides the all of the LOTR's and The Hobbits, he is also the man behind King Kong, The Lovely Bones and the incredible documentary They Shall Not Grow Old. 
BEST MOVIE: The Lord of the Rings Trilogy
John Hughes - Hughes pretty much dictated everything that I became obsessed with in my teens. From bad boys to '80's fashion Hughes could do no wrong. I have rewatched Ferris Bueller's Day Off, Sixteen Candles and Weird Science countless times, they're absolute classics. 
BEST MOVIE: The Breakfast Club
Stanley Kubrick  - Probably one of the most influential filmmakers of all time, Kubrick has crossed so many genres that his body of work is dizzying! He gave us giants like 2001: A Space Odyssey, The Shining, Full Metal Jacket, Spartacus and A Clockwork Orange. 
BEST MOVIE: Eyes Wide Shut
Alejandro González Iñárritu - With a flair for telling the most compelling international stories about the human condition, this highly acclaimed Mexican director gave us some unforgettable cinematic experiences like Birdman, Amores Perros, 21 Grams and The Revenant. 
BEST MOVIE: Babel
Oliver Stone - A controversial director that has been accused of being a conspiracy theorist. He actually wrote the script for Scarface (which was directed by Brian De Palma) and also gave us Platoon, The Doors, Born on the Fourth of July and Wall Street. 
BEST MOVIE: Natural Born Killers
Michel Gondry - A French director that uses strong visual themes and compositions (often called Mise-en-scene)  to tell a story. Because of this, Gondry's movies are visually striking and are often considered to be art house or avante-garde. He gave us The Science of Sleep, Be Kind Rewind and most recently the brilliant  television series Kidding. 
BEST MOVIE: Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind
Guillermo del Toro - A visionary fantasy director from Mexico who creatively brings monsters and mythical creatures to life in his films. Generally science fiction, horror or fantasy based, del Toro gave us some amazing otherworldly journeys through The Shape of Water, Hellboy and Crimson Peak.
BEST MOVIE: Pan's Labyrinth
Danny Boyle - This British director delivers equal measures of intense action and sincere emotion into everything that he does.  He's tried his hand at many genres and kept us gripped with Trainspotting, 28 Days Later, Sunshine, The Beach and more recently, Yesterday.
BEST MOVIE: Slumdog Millionaire
Sam Mendes - The buzz around this director has been huge this year, given the success of 1917. However, let's not forget all of his other epic offerings like American Beauty, Skyfall and Revolutionary Road.
BEST MOVIE: 1917 
James Wan  - An Australian-Malaysian director who rose to prominence after he co-created the Saw film franchise. Since then he has been scaring the pants off people with memorable horror films like The Conjuring, Insidious and Annabelle films.
BEST MOVIE: The Conjuring 2: The Enfield Case
Greta Gerwig - Actress and filmmaker, Gerwig collaborated with her partner (who is also a director) Noah Baumbach on several films before she kicked off her solo directing career in 2017 with Lady Bird. Since then, Gerwig has become a respected and predominant modern Hollywood director. 
BEST MOVIE: Little Women
Ridley Scott - I feel like I grew up watching Ridley Scott action and science fiction films. He's been entertaining me for decades and he's had some mind blowingly great movies like Alien, Blade Runner, Gladiator, Black Hawk Down and American Gangster. 
BEST MOVIE: The Martian
Michael Moore - A controversial American documentary filmmaker that gets up in everyone's face; love him or hate him, Michael Moore is hard to ignore. He's hit some very high notes with Fahrenheit 9/11, Sicko and Where to Invade Next. 
BEST MOVIE: Bowling for Columbine
Guy Ritchie - Before he married Madonna, Ritchie was making heaps of kick arse British gangster movies that were really funny and very entertaining.  He has just recently gone back to doing that again with The Gentlemen, but let's not forget that he also did Lock, Stock and Two Smoking Barrels, RocknRolla and believe it or not, the 2019 live action version of Aladdin. 
BEST MOVIE: Snatch
Jim Jarmusch - The patron saint of independent cinema since the '80's, Jarmusch's films are really arty, really cool, very edgy and hypnotically contemplative. He gave us Paterson, Deadman and Ghost Dog: The Way of the Samurai. 
BEST MOVIE: Only Lovers Left Alive
Steven Soderbergh - When Soderbergh made Unsane in 2018 and filmed it all on his iphone he made us feel like we were wasting our lives! He's a pioneer of independent cinema and his body of work is incredibly impressive; he gave us Contagion, Erin Brockovich and the Ocean's franchise. 
BEST MOVIE: Logan Lucky 
Christopher Nolan - He probably got a bit pigeon-holed for a while due to his Batman trilogy efforts (which I also loved) but let's not forget that he also gave us other memorable epics like Inception, Dunkirk and Memento. 
BEST MOVIE: Interstellar
Sam Raimi - Raimi terrified audiences in the 80's with The Evil Dead and then enchanted them in the early 2000's with Spiderman so it would be fair to say that his work is varied and vast. He also gave us some very noteworthy cult horror movies like Army of Darkness, Drag Me to Hell and Don't Breathe.
BEST MOVIE: The Evil Dead
Clint Eastwood - He blew everyone away when he started directing and acting in a string of extremely good and Oscar worthy movies, which he is still doing to this day. The man's got some serious talent and gave us gems like  Gran Torino, Million Dollar Baby and Mystic River.
BEST MOVIE: Unforgiven
Tim Burton - No-one does eccentric gothic horror and fantasy films better than Burton, he is the master! He has a style that is all his own, and with a lot of help from wife Helena Bonham Carter and actor Johnny Depp he's given us fantastical romps into magical fantasy worlds that have included Charlie and the Chocolate factory, Beetlejuice, Big Fish, Edward Scissorhands and Alice in Wonderland. 
BEST MOVIE: Sweeney Todd
Ang Lee - A visionary and a genuinely beautiful storyteller. It's rare for me not to get choked up when I watch an Ang Lee movie, they are just so deeply affecting. He gave us the gorgeous Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon, Life of Pi and The Ice Storm. 
BEST MOVIE: Brokeback Mountain
Sofia Coppola - Daughter of Francis Ford Coppola, Sofia has proven her worth as a director in her own right by delivering thoughtful explorations of female relationships and genuine, modern impressions of the human experience. She was responsible for The Virgin Suicides, Marie Antoinette and The Beguiled. 
BEST MOVIE: Lost in Translation
Judd Apatow -An American comedy director that started out producing and developing the television show Freaks and Geeks in the late 90's. He went on to direct Trainwreck, The 40-year-old Virgin and Knocked Up and also write some of the funniest movies that I have ever seen. 
​BEST MOVIE: Superbad
Alfred Hitchcock - The most influential and extensively studied filmmaker in the history of cinema, how could I possibly leave Hitchcock off my list? He's been giving audiences thrills and chills for years, and he still is with his extensive repertoire of thriller classics like North by Northwest, The Birds, Rear Window and Vertigo.
BEST MOVIE: Psycho
David Fincher - Ever since I saw The Game in 1997 I became interested in seeing more of Fincher's work. He's delivered a strong, controversial and impactful body of work and was responsible for Seven, The Girl with the Dragon Tattoo, The Social Network and Gone Girl.
BEST MOVIE: Fight Club
Paolo Sorrentino - An Italian director with an eye for truly beautiful and meaningful cinema. His films are absolute masterpieces and offer viewers moments of contemplation and glimpses of magic - I am obsessed with his work. He's responsible for Youth and This Must Be the Place. 
BEST MOVIE: The Great Beauty.
Joel and Ethan Coen - Genius brothers who bring something fresh, quirky and unique to the screen every time.  Their repertoire is so vast and so excellent that I really struggled to pick my favourite because they delivered The Big Lebowski, Blood Simple, O Brother Where Art Thou?, Fargo, Raising Arizona, Burn After Reading and True Grit, all of which were exceptionally great.
BEST MOVIE: No Country For Old Men
Alfonso Cuaron - A critically acclaimed Mexican director with an impeccable body of high quality work that crosses just about every genre of cinema including thriller, fantasy, science fiction and drama. Thanks Cuaron for giving us truly unforgettable moments like Y Tu Mama Tambien, Gravity and Children of Men.
BEST MOVIE: Roma
Francis Ford Coppola - Widely considered to be one of the greatest filmmakers of all time, Coppola practically had an all out nervous breakdown whilst filming Apocalypse Now in 1979. His commitment to 'getting the film right' has led people to see him a visionary of cinema. He gave us such giants as The Godfather trilogy, Bram Stoker's Dracula and The Outsiders. 
BEST MOVIE: Apocalypse Now
Quentin Tarantino - Known for his uber violent, non-linear storylines that contain extended dialogue, huge ensemble casts and loads of Pop Culture references, Tarantino has a style that is all his own. Many of his films pay homage to all of his own cinematic loves, especially Japanese martial arts, kung fu movies, spaghetti westerns and Italian horror. He's the man behind the following cinematic  juggernauts - Reservoir Dogs, Pulp Fiction, Once Upon a Time in Hollywood, Django Unchained, Kill Bill Vol 1 and 2, Death Proof and The Hateful Eight.
BEST MOVIE: Inglourious Basterds
Martin McDonagh - Considered to be the most acclaimed living Irish- British playwright, McDonagh caught my attentions when he made In Bruge, and then delivered again with Seven Psychopaths in 2012. But we all know him best for his amazing 2017 offering that made my Hall of Fame.
BEST MOVIE: Three Billboards Outside Ebbing, Missouri
Kathryn Bigelow - Spreading herself across a wide range of genres, Bigelow is not afraid to grapple the big topics. She is forging the way for future female directors with her stellar repertoire which includes Zero Dark Thirty, Near Dark and Point Break.
BEST MOVIE: The Hurt Locker
Darren Aronofsky - A director with a flair for delivering surreal, melodramatic and often disturbing content in his movies. Audiences often seem divided on Aronofsky's material, but I think that he is one of the most talented filmmakers of his generation. He brought us Black Swan, Requiem for a Dream, Pi, The Fountain and Mother!
BEST MOVIE: The Wrestler
Steven Spielberg - Okay, I know that he can be cheesy as hell, but when he gets it right - he really gets it right. There's a reason that Spielberg is still filling cinemas, the man knows how to make a movie. Besides I was virtually raised on Spielberg's material. He gave us E.T., Saving Private Ryan, Jurassic Park, Ready Player One, Schindler's List, Raiders of the Lost Ark, War of the Worlds and Jaws. 
BEST MOVIE: A.I. 
Tarsem Singh - An Indian director that creates films that are a complete immersion and a true feast for the senses. Stunning and absolutely unforgettable, I love his vision and wish that he would make more movies. Singh gave us Immortals, The Cell and Mirror Mirror.
BEST MOVIE: The Fall
Paul Thomas Anderson - Contemplative and filled with flawed and desperate characters, Anderson's movies explore dysfunctional families, alienation and loneliness and they are deeply affecting. He delivered some of my favourite cinematic experiences like Magnolia, Boogie Nights and Punch Drunk Love.
BEST MOVIE: There Will Be Blood.
Martin Scorsese - An American director best known for his gangster and crime movies, he is widely considered to be one of the most influential directors of the New Hollywood era. He tends to cast the same actors in many of his movies, and he has a long professional relationship with Robert De Niro. Scorsese gave us Goodfellas, Taxi Driver, The Departed, Raging Bull and most recently The Irishman. 
BEST MOVIE: Casino
David Cronenberg - Sometimes called the 'Baron of Blood' due to his visceral body horror movies. Cronenberg has made films that people never forget that they have seen, because they are so grotesque! It's really no surprise that I love his work! He gave us The Fly, Videodrome and  Scanners.
BEST MOVIE: eXistenZ
Alexander Payne -  One of the best filmmakers of all time, Payne's movies are full of dark humour and satirical depictions of a dysfunctional modern America. He's the man behind Sideways, About Schmidt and Nebraska.
BEST MOVIE: The Descendants
Jennifer Kent - Kent made her directorial debut in 2014 with the haunting film The Babadook. She is an Australian director that is willing to handle sensitive and disturbing material. Her 2018 movie The Nightingale caused waves due to it's graphic content, but I thought that it was one of the best film of that year. 
BEST MOVIE: The Nightingale
Roman Polanski - I wish that someone that wasn't a pedophile had directed Rosemary's Baby because it's definitely one of my favourite movies of all time. But the love ends there Roman because you're just not a good guy. 
BEST MOVIE: Rosemary's Baby 
HONOURABLE MENTIONS: aka 'I still love ya'

• Terrence Malick - The Thin Red Line and The Tree of Life, total game changers.
• Brian de Palma - Carrie and Scarface, enough said. 
• Dario Argento - 1977 Suspiria, nothing has come close to matching it in crazy colour design and stylised macabre.
• Neill Blomkamp - District 9 was next level genius, can we get more of that please? 
• Baz Luhrmann - Absolutely loved the Red Curtain Trilogy, and let's not forget The Great Gatsby or Australia. 
• Duncan Jones - you had me at Moon.
• Kenneth Lonergan - Manchester by the Sea, one of the most affecting movies I've ever seen.
• Woody Allen - actually I really don't love ya - NOT at all, you're a weirdo and you're a creep! However, I cannot deny that Blue Jasmine, Annie Hall, Mighty Aphrodite and Vicky Cristina Barcelona were all worthy watches. 

The Golden Globes Awards happened on Monday at midday and I was lucky enough to watch them in real time from the comfort of my couch. However, it is extremely hard to really enjoy any type of celebration or merriment wholeheartedly at the moment without feeling extremely guilty. Especially when you are surrounded by a very ominous, dark, smokey haze that has drifted over from the devastating bushfires that are ravaging our country at the moment. To call the state of affairs in Australia grim at the moment would be a serious understatement, they are truly troubling and frightening real. 
Gone are the days of a laid back and relaxed Aussie Summer, the reality of our warmer season now is  an endurance of long dry days, hypervigilance and dire concern as year after year we watch in despair as our country turns to ash. And I am well aware that our climate makes us more susceptible to bushfire, but the frequency, ferocity and duration of this year's blazes has been unprecedented. Nowhere in Australia is safe from the threat of fire anymore and when you already live in a high fire risk area as I do, you can't help but be very, very concerned. 
Many of the actors that took to the stage on Monday extended their thoughts and solidarity towards Australia during our country's fire crisis, but goodwill and thoughts, although kind, aren't exactly going to extinguish the roaring blazes or save family homes. So, what can anyone really do to help? At this point in the crisis what we really need is more money, money to replace homes and support devastated communities to get back onto their feet and to help care for injured wildlife and fund koala hospitals. These donations can be made through The Red Cross, the CFA, Wildlife Victoria and also directly to The Victorian Bushfire Appeal, all of whom can easily be reached online if you feel compelled to offer financial support. 
In the long run however, it is up to us as a nation to not only be stronger in our fire awareness and prevention but to be far more mindful about where we place our votes for our country's leadership in the future. Without a leader in this country that is willing to make serious and realistic moves towards our climate change issues nothing is going to improve. Australia desperately needs a national climate and energy policy review, and most of all a leader that is willing to undertake that work. That is never going to happen if we don't make it happen, so please, I implore you to not waste your next vote but to thoughtfully consider what the future of our country will look like for our children and children's children and to have that at the forefront of your thinking when you vote next. Come on Australia - we can make big changes for the better by just casting our vote to where it is needed. 
​But enough about politics, let's lighten the mood and announce the Golden Globe recipients for 2020 - a most worthy and deserving bunch for sure:

Words are flowing out
Like endless rain into a paper cup
They slither while they pass
They slip away across the universe
Pools of sorrow, waves of joy
After drifting through my opened mind
Possessing and caressing me
Jai Guru Deva, Om
Nothing's gonna change my world...

Beautiful words from John Lennon and the lyrics from the incredible song Across the Universe by The Beatles.  
And why have I written them here? Well, sometimes I find that words are not always enough to express a feeling, but song lyrics - like poetry, seem to fill that void for me. In fact, I often seek the mellow embrace of a song when I really need to let it all out and there are many songs that evoke deep emotional responses within me, but for some unknown reason Across the Universe is one that I find myself turning to when my emotions get a bit jammed up or muddled. 
Apparently, The Beatles stated that the song was heavily influenced by their interest in Transcendental Meditation during the late 1960's. The mantra "Jai Guru Dev, Om" that features in the song is actually a Sanskrit phrase whose words can have many meanings. In translation it approximates as "glory to the shining remover of darkness" and it can also be paraphrased as "Victory of God divine", "hail to the divine guru," or the phrase commonly invoked by the late Maharishi Mahesh Yogi in referring to his spiritual teacher, "All glory to Guru Dev."
Whatever the interpretation, the lyrics are highly image-based with abstract concepts and in a 1970 interview with Rolling Stone magazine, John Lennon referred to the lyrics of Across the Universe as "one of the best lyrics that I've written. In fact, it could be the best. It's good poetry, or whatever you call it, without chewin' it." And he is right, it is an incredibly well written piece of music and I always feel emotional when I listen to it. 
I suppose everyone has their favourite songs that they turn to when they want to cry a little or release something or just feel a connection. Here is a list of my top 25 favourite "get your feels out" songs that help me to release my pent up emotions. These songs really get me right in the heart every damn time that I listen to them. 

1. Across the Universe - I love The Beatles version, but recently Aurora did a version on Triple J's Like a Version and it is pretty much perfect in every way. 
2. This Woman's Work - Kate Bush 
3. Thirty-Three - The Smashing Pumpkins 
4. Morning Theft or Hallelujah - Jeff Buckley
5. Breathe Me - Sia 
6. Speak My Mind or Decision- N.Y.C.K. 
7. Get on the Road - Tired Pony
8. The Drugs Don't Work - The Verve
9. Unravel - Bjork
10. Watch You Go - Tyne-James Organ
11. Horizon - Aldous Harding 
12. Listen to Soul, Listen to Blues - Safia
13. River - Leon Bridges 
14. No Stars - Rebekah Del Rio 
15. Delete - DMA's 
16. Runaway or Vanderlyle Crybaby Geeks- The National 
17. Into Yellow - Martin Luke Brown
18. Pain and Misery - The Teskey Brothers 
19. ​Misplaced - Riley Pearce
20. Elegy - Leif Vollebekk
21. Primitive - Annie Lennox
22. All We Do - Oh Wonder 
23. I Get Overwhelmed - Dark Rooms
24. Medicine - Daughter
25. The Finish Line - Snow Patrol

I'm not 100% sure that crying out your feels to your favourite sad songs is the best way to deal with your emotions, but sometimes we all need to go to dark places to find ourselves again after stressful or traumatic times and listening to "get your feels out" songs seems like a pretty innocuous way to do that; just make sure you bring your tissue box along for the ride! 

JOJO RABBIT
Release Date: 2019 
Rating: MA 15+ 
Running Time: 108 mins
Written and directed by Taika Waititi (who also stars as an imaginary Adolf Hitler) Jojo Rabbit is set to divide viewers with it's strange mixture of comedy, war and drama. This unexpected 'feel good' movie swings between poignant and disturbing depictions of the atrocities of WW2 and full blown Nazi-mocking humour, never really committing to any one genre for the duration.
Living in Nazi occupied Germany during the latter stages of WW2, young Johannes "Jojo" Betzler, his best friend Yorki and his imaginary friend Adolf Hitler attend a Deutsches Jungvolk Hitler Youth training Camp together. The camp is designed to offer boys the basics in Nazi training, whilst strengthen their hate for all things Jewish. However, when Jojo comes into close contact with a Jewish girl, all of his training and pre-conceptions are put to the test. 
This is really funny stuff; Taika Waititi, Rebel Wilson, Stephen Merchant, Sam Rockwell and Scarlett Johansson all bring a lot of comic relief and support to Roman Griffin Davis who plays Jojo with loads of flair and and an engaging fresh faced innocence.  However, this movie is not just all about the laughs, because there are a lot of important and valuable things being said here as well which definitely makes it one of the most original films of the year for me. 
For fans of previous Waititi offerings, you are certainly in for a treat and although there is no denying that Jojo Rabbit isn't not going to appeal to everyone's taste, it certainly appealed to mine. 
FINAL SAY: Definitely not a good time to be a Nazi. 
4 Chilli Peppers ​

So, the 2020 Golden Globe Nominations have been announced, which will pretty much dictate what I will be watching over my summer break. Yep, I am going to be hitting the couch and the cinema pretty hard over the next few weeks so that I can watch the actual Golden Globe Awards Ceremony live on Arena on January 6th and have some understanding of the content that has been nominated.
As an avid movie addict, I do feel very compelled to see at least 75% of everything nominated before an event of this calibre occurs in order for me to be discerning about whether a movie/program is worthy of the win or not. 
This year there is some really great news for those of you out there that don't like to go the cinema very often because quite a number of the nominated films and television programs are actually available through various streaming networks (which I have indicated below for your viewing ease) which means that you can watch a good swag of them from the comfort of your own couch in preparation for the big event. 
I cannot deny that there does appear to be a couple of incredibly great movies and television series that have been snubbed from the lists here, but this happens every year and I will get around to sharing my personal top pics of the year list very soon, so let's just go with what's been nominated here, and I will talk more about my personal choices for the best of 2019 in the very near future.
So, without further ado, here are the 2020 Golden Globe Nominations - happy viewing!
Best Motion Picture — Drama
1917
The Irishman - Netflix
Joker
Marriage Story - Netflix
The Two Popes - Netflix
Best Motion Picture — Musical or Comedy
Dolemite Is My Name -  Netflix
Jojo Rabbit
Knives Out
Once Upon a Time in Hollywood
Rocketman
Best Foreign-Language Motion Picture
The Farewell
Les Misérables 
Pain and Glory 
Parasite
Portrait of a Lady on Fire
Best Limited Series or TV Movie
Catch-22 - Stan
Chernobyl - HBO
Fosse/Verdon - HBO
The Loudest Voice - Showtime
Unbelievable - Netflix
Best Television Series — Drama
Big Little Lies - HBO
The Crown - Netflix
Killing Eve -  ABC iview or Stan
The Morning Show
Succession - HBO
Best Comedy Series
Fleabag - Amazon Prime
Barry - HBO
The Kominsky Method - Netflix
The Marvelous Mrs. Maisel - Amazon Prime
The Politician - Netflix
Best Motion Picture — Animated
Frozen II
How to Train Your Dragon: The Hidden World
Missing Link
Toy Story 4
The Lion King
Best Director — Motion Picture
Bong Joon-ho, Parasite
Sam Mendes, 1917
Todd Phillips, Joker
Martin Scorsese, The Irishman
Quentin Tarantino, Once Upon a Time in Hollywood
Best Performance by an Actor in a Limited Series or Movie
Christopher Abbott, Catch-22
Sacha Baron Cohen, The Spy
Russell Crowe, The Loudest Voice
Jared Harris, Chernobyl
Sam Rockwell, Fosse/Verdon
Best Performance by an Actress in a Limited Series or Movie
Kaitlyn Dever, Unbelievable
Joey King, The Act - Hulu 
Helen Mirren, Catherine the Great - Foxtel
Merritt Wever, Unbelievable
Michelle Williams, Fosse/Verdon
Best Performance by a Supporting Actor in a Series, Limited Series, or TV Movie
Alan Arkin, The Kominsky Method
Kieran Culkin, Succession
Andrew Scott, Fleabag
Stellan Skarsgård, Chernobyl
Henry Winkler, Barry
Best Performance by a Supporting Actress in a Series, Limited Series, or TV Movie
Patricia Arquette, The Act 
Helena Bonham Carter, The Crown
Toni Collette, Unbelievable
Meryl Streep, Big Little Lies
Emily Watson, Chernobyl
Best Score for a Motion Picture
Little Women
Joker
Marriage Story
1917
Motherless Brooklyn
Best Original Song
“Beautiful Ghosts,” Cats
“(I’m Gonna) Love Me Again,” Rocketman
“Into the Unknown,” Frozen II
“Spirit,” The Lion King
“Stand Up,” Harriet
Best Performance by an Actor in a Comedy Series
Michael Douglas, The Kominsky Method - Netflix
Bill Hader, Barry - HBO
Ben Platt, The Politician - Netflix
Paul Rudd, Living With Yourself - Netflix
Ramy Youssef, Ramy - Stan
Best Performance by an Actress in a Comedy Series
Christina Applegate, Dead to Me - Netflix
Kirsten Dunst, On Becoming a God in Central Florida -  SBS
Rachel Brosnahan, The Marvelous Mrs. Maisel - Amazon Prime
Natasha Lyonne, Russian Doll - Netflix
Phoebe Waller-Bridge, Fleabag - Amazon Prime
Best Performance by an Actor in a Drama Series
Brian Cox, Succession - HBO
Kit Harington, Game of Thrones - Foxtel
Rami Malek, Mr. Robot - HBO
Tobias Menzies, The Crown
Billy Porter, Pose -Foxtel
Best Performance by an Actress in a Drama Series
Jennifer Aniston, The Morning Show - Apple TV+
Jodie Comer, Killing Eve
Olivia Colman, The Crown
Nicole Kidman, Big Little Lies
Reese Witherspoon, The Morning Show
Best Performance by a Supporting Actor in a Motion Picture 
Tom Hanks, A Beautiful Day in the Neighborhood
Anthony Hopkins, The Two Popes
Al Pacino, The Irishman
Joe Pesci, The Irishman
Brad Pitt, Once Upon a Time in Hollywood
Best Screenplay
Marriage Story
Parasite
The Two Popes
Once Upon a Time in Hollywood
The Irishman
Best Performance by a Supporting Actress in a Motion Picture
Kathy Bates, Richard Jewell
Annette Bening, The Report
Laura Dern, Marriage Story
Jennifer Lopez, Hustlers
Margot Robbie, Bombshell
Best Performance by an Actor in a Motion Picture — Musical or Comedy
Daniel Craig, Knives Out
Taron Egerton, Rocketman
Roman Griffin Davis, Jojo Rabbit
Eddie Murphy, Dolemite Is My Name
Leonardo DiCaprio, Once Upon a Time in Hollywood
Best Performance by an Actor in a Motion Picture — Drama
Christian Bale, Ford v Ferrari
Antonio Banderas, Pain and Glory
Adam Driver, Marriage Story
Joaquin Phoenix, Joker
Jonathan Pryce, The Two Popes
Best Performance by an Actress in a Motion Picture — Musical or Comedy
Ana de Armas, Knives Out
Cate Blanchett, Where’d You Go, Bernadette
Beanie Feldstein, Booksmart
Emma Thompson, Late Night
Awkwafina, The Farewell
Best Performance by an Actress in a Motion Picture — Drama
Cynthia Erivo, Harriet
Scarlett Johansson, Marriage Story
Saoirse Ronan, Little Women
Charlize Theron, Bombshell
Renée Zellweger, Judy

It is difficult to say whether or not the holiday that Craig and I had booked for our 25th wedding anniversary in Vanuatu had arrived at the most inopportune time ever or the most opportune time ever, but it did happen and we did get on a plane just days after my father's funeral and escape all of the worry and strife of the real world to go to one of the most pristine stretches of beach in the Eastern Pacific to sip cocktails and bask in the sun for five incredible days. 
This was our first trip to Vanuatu and the first time that Craig and I have booked a holiday that was just about the two of us in almost 12 years, so you could say that we were more than due to have some quality 'one on one' time. And perhaps it really was the best time to get away. I was still numb from all of my grief and in dire need of some TLC and headspace, and this holiday did feel genuinely like a complete exhale and a total spiritual reboot in so many ways. 
We stayed at the Eratap Beach Resort which is a boutique style, eco-friendly and completely authentic beach resort that is focused on low numbers, no children and complete five star beachside luxury. From the moment that we arrived and our accommodating host placed a cocktail into my hand as we entered I felt my shoulders drop and my stress begin to just melt away. We had just arrived in paradise, a real paradise with crystal clear waters, gentle ocean breezes and an award winning chef in the kitchen who provided us with nightly seafood feasts that were some of the best dishes that I have ever eaten in my life. 
The food? Completely gourmet and absolutely delicious. The drinks? Different cocktail specials every night and an extensive list that I indulged completely. The beach? White sands, azure and turquoise sparkling waters and the most incredible snorkeling you could ever imagine with clown fish, angel fish and even a giant red octopus; it was so damn good that I couldn't believe it was actually real. The resort? Pristine, perfect and completely seducing with it's swaying palms, tropical grounds and uber friendly staff. We felt like kings from the moment that we arrived and were treated like superstars for the duration. 
We kayaked, snorkelled, swam, hiked, ate, drank and lounged about for five days. We took two journeys outside of the resort which were both provided free of charge by the resort, one to visit the local village of Eratap to see their homes, school and church, and one into Port Vila for a spot of souvenir shopping. The rest of the time we did our own thing, ate whenever we wanted to because the restaurant was open until 11pm every day, and pretty much felt like we were there on our own because there are only 12 villas on the premises, so their were really only around 20 guests on the grounds at any given time. Heaven, totally and utterly divine in every way, we loved it and we were so sad to leave when our stay finally came to it's inevitable conclusion. 
Anyway...one quick 4.5 hour flight back to Melbourne from Port Vila and a fairly short drive from Tullamarine and we were back in Enfield. Unfortunately, it was not the happy return that we had been expecting and we were quickly slammed back into reality when we realised that both of the kids weren't well. Zoe could barely speak and was sporting a raging head cold and a very sore throat, and Seth who seemed okay on Friday night when we got home very late, arose on Saturday morning saying that he felt unwell and by 7pm on Saturday night we had him at the hospital Emergency Room after he had a febrile seizure and passed out in our lounge room. 
He had been vomiting on Saturday and his temperature had gotten dangerously high, then his blood pressure plummeted and teamed with his dehydration from vomiting, he went down for the count (thank God Craig caught him) and they had to put him on drip at the hospital, administer anti-nausea tablets and run some blood tests just to make sure that he didn't have anything more sinister going on. It was pretty stressful, and it was really not good to be back in the emergency ward of a hospital again so soon. However, all is well and Seth was released from hospital at 11pm on Saturday night with the all clear and slept like a baby at home until 9.30am this morning. 
Today I have been able to play nursemaid to both of the kids, and although I wish that we had returned home to happier circumstances, I am also tremendously relieved that we were home to take care of them and the entire situation ourselves. It is wonderful to get away and I am glad that Craig and I got to share such a wonderful experience of complete tranquility in Vanuatu; but for now.... it's back to reality and back to work tomorrow, because nothing - not even paradise - can last forever. 

Sometimes a movie will capture me up. It doesn't happen all of the time, in fact it is incredibly rare when it does happen which is what makes it so remarkable and also special when it does occur. Very few movies have that kind of an effect on me and when they do, I find myself completely swept away on an intensely emotional journey. It is so emotional and connective that when the film reaches its inevitable conclusion I find that I suffer a weird type of remorse about it. This is because I have delved so deeply into the vision of the actors and the fabric of the story that I genuinely feel the film on the level that the director would have wanted the audience to feel it; which in a word is -completely.
For a moment, somewhere between 90 to 120 minutes, I am totally immersed in something so completely perfect that I become 100% absorbed by it in every way. My mind, body and soul are totally engulfed in the sweet visual transformation and I become riveted by the possible outcomes; so of course after being completely consumed to that level, I lament the end when it eventually arrives. 
Usually these 'swept away' moments happen during the wee small hours of the night, and are often after a few solitary libations and only ever after the house has fallen blissfully still and silent. These cherished moments are absolutely private and utterly perfect in their composition, just like a well crafted movie should be and they are something that I deeply covet as an avid lover of cinema; those golden moments when I get lost in an amazing movie. 
And it is during these wee private hours that I get to indulge in the movies that no-one else in the house would ever venture to investigate or appreciate me watching during their viewing hours. But these precious cinematic icons of days gone by or magically modern expressions of something as yet untold are pure gold to me. They evoke tears and connection and above all else they speak to me, they sing to my soul in private and perfect ways; in ways that only true lovers of cinema could ever really comprehend.
These kinds of movies are rare gems, they're transformative and altogether beautiful expressions that don't happen as often as I would like because being as addicted to cinema as I am means that I have to wade through hours and hours of mediocrity to arrive at a movie that has this much of an affect on me. And just like any addict, it is these ultimate highs that keep me going  back over and over to attain the rush all over again. It is the movies that affect me this deeply that make me acutely aware of just how addicted to quality cinema I really am. Quality movies really are an obsession, a preoccupation and a secret longing that I harbour and in those wee hours when my yearnings are fulfilled, well those are some of the best nights of the year for me.   
And it just so happens that I kicked off my Spring holiday break with a 2.30am viewing that did sate my urge and did sweep me away, and it felt so good to be lost in a good movie again because it really has been such a very long time between drinks for me and it felt so good to be swallowed up by something of substance all over again. 

45 YEARS 
Release Date: 2015
Rating: M
Running Time: 91 minutes 
A British drama, directed and written by Andrew Haigh and based on the short story "In Another Country" by David Constantine. After its premiere 45 Years gained a lot of attention, particularly for actress Charlotte Rampling who was nominated at the 88th Academy Awards for Best Actress in a Leading Role for her stellar performance as Kate Mercer. She and Tom Courtenay, who plays Geoff Mercer, both deservedly won Best Actress and Best Actor Silver Bear Awards at the Berlin International Film Festival.
Kate and Geoff Mercer are just about to celebrate their 45th wedding anniversary when Geoff receives news from Switzerland that the body of his long lost German lover from the 1960's has been discovered in a melting glacier.  Kate is disturbed that Geoff had not previously shared this information about his German lover, the events that surrounded her death or the depth of their relationship. Doubt and suspicion starts to develop. 
This movie feels genuine, on every level. The couple seem completely at ease with one another, the relationship is plausible and the conversations that they share are so natural that you almost feel like a fly on the wall as you watch the story unfold. Rampling and Courtenay are truly amazing together and epitomise all of the comfort of predictability and distress of change that older people are so well known for. There really aren't enough moves about mature aged couples, but there should be more of them. If 45 Years is anything to go by, I definitely want to see more.
FINAL SAY: Would you have married her? 
4 Chilli Peppers 

Whenever I tell people that I have a website that is dedicated to reviewing movies they always ask me the same question - What's Your Favourite Movie of All Time? As a lover of movies, this is one of the hardest questions that I ever get asked because it is almost impossible to choose just one movie when I have seen and enjoyed so many.
There is a reason that I have a Hall of Fame page that is dedicated to movies that I gave 5 Chilli Peppers to, and that's because I find it so hard to compare movies from different genres against each other. If someone asks me what my favourite movie is, I usually respond with 'that depends on which genre you're talking about.'
If I could have the option of choosing a favourite in each genre, then I could definitely tell you my favourites without any trouble at all:
DRAMA: Manchester by the Sea
HORROR: Rosemary's Baby
SCIENCE FICTION: Interstellar
​WAR: Inglourious Basterds
SUPER: Avengers: Endgame
COMEDY: Snatch
CRIME/ACTION: No Country for Old Men
ART HOUSE: Youth
FOREIGN: The Great Beauty (La Grande Bellezza) 
FANTASY: The Lord of the Rings Trilogy
GRITTY: Melancholia
ROMANCE: Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind 
KID FRIENDLY: Kubo and the Two Strings 

So why are these my favourite films when I have so many more listed on my Hall of Fame that are also 5 Chilli Peppers worthy? Well that's easy, these are the movies that I go back to time and time again and always enjoy them just as much as I did the first time that I watched them. All of them had an effect on me in one way or another and all of them left me pondering after I had seen them. I guess that I really don't have one favourite movie of all time, I actually have 13, which also happens to be my lucky number! 

Everyone has at least one great story to tell. Some people actually have even more than that, but everyone has at least one story that will either enchant, revolt, tantalize, amuse or tug at your heart strings in some way. The reason that I know this to be true is because I like to really listen to people, and when you really listen to people they will tell you the most marvellous things.
Not everything that people will tell you when you listen to them will be happy, in fact some things will be sad or even harrowing or worst of all vile, but they will tell you a story if you give them enough of your attention and ask the right questions, and that is when you will hear the most interesting stories that will stay with you forever. And stories should be varied anyway, our experience of the human condition is completely individualised and therefore multifaceted. No two people have the same life experiences and no two people will even view the same life experience in the same way, so when you think about it like that there are actually billions and billions of untold stories floating around inside random people right now just waiting to be heard. 
Some people have a genuine gift for storytelling and when they start to speak you just want to grab a cuppa and a cushion and dig in for a good listening session. Other people aren't quite as engaging when they tell their tales, but that doesn't make their stories any less meaningful or interesting in the long run. Sometimes the briefest of tales can be the most poignant and meaningful. It is claimed that Ernest Hemingway once wrote a six-word story that could make people for a cry for a bet. The wager was ten dollars, which Hemingway won with the following: "For Sale: Baby Shoes. Never worn." 
In 2006, Wired magazine followed Hemingway's example and asked sci-fi, fantasy and horror writers to come up with their own six word stories, here are a few of my favourites: 
Gown removed carelessly. Head, less so.
- Joss Whedon
Longed for him. Got him. Shit.
- Margaret Atwood
The baby’s blood type? Human, mostly.
- Orson Scott Card
Kirby had never eaten toes before.
- Kevin Smith
TIME MACHINE REACHES FUTURE!!! … nobody there …
- Harry Harrison
Heaven falls. Details at eleven.
- Robert Jordan
He read his obituary with confusion.
- Steven Meretzky
You just gotta love a good story, and even though some are clearly more interesting or insightful than others, none of them are not worth hearing. Who knows? The next person that you meet could have the most interesting tale in the world to share with you! So make sure you take some time to listen to the people around you...because they do want to tell you things! 

ONCE UPON A TIME IN HOLLYWOOD
Release Date: 2019
Rating: MA 15+
Running Time: 161 mins 
A crime/ drama and at times an exceptionally dark comedy, Once Upon a Time In Hollywood is Quentin Tarantino's brilliantly executed homage to the end of The Golden Age of Hollywood. With a massive ensemble cast and multiple storylines, this is a fairy tale retell of the days surrounding the brutal Sharon Tate murders by the Manson cult that occurred in 1969. Unlike other Tarantino movies, this film demonstrates more restraint around the levels of on screen graphic gore and violence...well...mostly, there are still some intense graphic scenes to experience here, but it is Tarantino and we have all come to expect some shock violence from his films. 
Fading Western television star Rick Dalton (Leonardo DiCaprio) and his best friend and stunt double Cliff Booth (Brad Pitt) encounter colourful and controversial characters as they try to maneuver Dalton out of Hollywood 'Has-Been' oblivion and back into the limelight with the help of spaghetti westerns and Hollywood opportunities. 
No late '60's stone goes unturned here, with everything from The Playboy Mansion and Roman Polanski  to Bruce Lee  and Charles Manson getting a look in. And it all mishmashes together into one terrifically enjoyable old pop culture tribute that I completely adored. I was riveted for the duration and grateful to see something so refreshingly new at the cinema again. 
DiCaprio and Pitt are not only on their A game but they are having a lot of fun with this already witty script. The cast is absolutely massive; Tarantino has again used Zoe Bell and Kurt Russell well, but has also added some fresh new faces to his cast list with notable performances from Margot Robbie as Sharon Tate, Lena Dunham as Gypsy, Dakota Fanning as Squeaky Fromme, Bruce Dern as George Spahn and stealing some hard to grab attention from everyone else was newcomer Julia Butters playing the wise western star child Trudi. 
This is not my favourite Tarantino offering, but I cannot deny that it is one of his best, and it is definitely the best thing that I have seen at the cinema so far this year. 
FINAL SAY: It's official, old buddy. I'm a has-been.
4.5 Chilli Peppers ​

I was looking at a photo of myself in my Year 8 homeroom class the other day. Good Lord! I was so ridiculously awkward and dorky, there are just no words to describe it accurately, but I will try. Slightly spotty, thin as a rail - which actually goes against everything that my ballet teacher told me that year about how my neck was way too fat for me to ever be a ballet dancer (thanks Charlotte, that didn't half damage me as a teenager!) but anyway, let's get back to my youthful hopelessness. In the photo I have the worst perm imaginable, I mean truly horrific, I do recall wanting a trendy 80's Madonna spiral perm and what I got was more Kath Day-Knight from Kath and Kim than anything Madonna would ever be seen dead in. I don't have a scrap of make-up on, I have a discoloured front tooth, I have the limpest lace headband on and I look like I have no idea what's going on whatsoever. 
What I do get from that photo though is my complete innocence and obvious unawareness of just how much of a dork I actually am. And in truth, I don't actually even remember being or feeling like a total dork in early high school. I don't even think that anyone picked on me for that horrific hairdo or for being a pretty big sado, even though that photo does scream sad on so many levels. However, I do firmly believe that if any teenager rocked up to high school looking like that these days that they would be eaten alive by their peers. 
Now I don't want to paint an inaccurate picture of high school in the eighties being all rainbows and one big lovey-dovey getalong fest, because that would be total bullshit, it wasn't like that at all. High school in the eighties was also a brutal and cruel landscape that teenagers had to endure and attempt to maneuver through with as little baggage and a need for therapy at the other end. I'm pretty sure that high school in any decade came with it's own unique challenges and horrific coming of age awkwardness. However, when I was at high school the standards and expectations around teenage beauty were quite different and without any social media saturation, I think that the pressures to conform to certain physical standards were much lower for us than they are for teenagers now. 
Back in my day, every teenage girl wanted to look like the gorgeous teenage models on the front of Dolly magazine, but honestly even those perfect specimens were really quite normal and healthy looking Australian teens. Some of them even had visible imperfections, and since airbrushing was not a practised art, those girls looked real and felt quite accessible. They weren't glossy or perfect and they really looked like teenage girls and not like young adults. Some Dolly cover girls even had crooked teeth, thick unplucked eyebrows and heaven forbid -everyday faces! And the magazine regularly had articles and advice about realistic health and wellbeing issues that teenage girls legitimately faced at that time. I loved Dolly when I was a teenager and some of those self empowerment articles helped me to believe in my inner beauty and find confidence in my own imperfect skin.
I actually work across the road and around the corner from two secondary schools and everyday I see gorgeous teenage girls walking to and from school. Some of those girls look years older than they actually are and so many of them have dreadful posture because they are slumped over their iphones as they travel around. Some of them will never truly understand the power that they have right now; the poor things can't even see their own potential, youth and beauty because they are so caught up in trying to be part of a manufactured and unrealistic standard. And because of that, they are robbing themselves of their right to be innocent and imperfect. 
How fast do your teenage years go? So damn fast and once they are gone, they are gone forever. You literally have the entire rest of your life to perfect your flaws, find your signature look and climb upon the wheel of lifelong beauty struggles as most adult women tend to do. However, in your teenage years it's totally fine to have imperfect teeth and skin, it's okay to have some puppy fat and a bad perm, it's expected that you will wear clothes that are not in your colours or that suit your style and body shape, and above all it's your time to embrace looking like a total dork and not even caring about it!
Sure, I looked like a trainwreck in Year 8, but I was blissfully unaware of that and I am so glad that I got to have those early teenage years of innocence and oblivion. Who knows what kind of an obsessive nutter I would be now if I hadn't have had that time? I shudder at the thought, and I also feel so very sorry and mostly sad for all of the gorgeous teenagers out there that are already overthinking things way too much for their own good, underestimating their appearance and not revelling in a soon to be lost and never to be returned - age of innocence. 

I know that I am so often banging on like a Salvation Army drum about self care, self maintenance and self awareness, and obviously I do hold those things in very high regard. However, with that being said, I do also believe that it is not only our job to care for ourselves, but to also care for others as well. We have an obligation to help everyone and everything on the planet as well as ourselves, which means that we need to not only be hyper vigilant about caring for ourselves but also extremely attentive with our care and concern for the wellbeing of others as well. 
There is no point running about claiming to have your shit together if you are neglecting your loved ones, your friends, members of your community or anyone else that finds themselves in times of hardship or crisis.  We are not doing well in the world when we ignore those around us that are fallen, weak, lonely or destitute.
When we find ourselves in a position of good fortune and wellness then it is our turn to extend a hand, an ear or a dollar to assist others to stand back up onto their feet as well. Some people are only in need of some quality time, a little tea and sympathy may be all that is required. A kind word, a small gesture or thought, a supportive conversation; helping others doesn't have to be expensive or difficult.
It is true that some people's needs may require more time and money than you can invest in on your own, but you can still be a catalyst in launching a meaningful kick start with the help of a local charity or foundation. You can volunteer some time to a local organisation that is in alignment with something that you care about, you can help to fundraise for an important cause and you can spare a few dollars to allow someone else to have more. 
People often don't volunteer because they just don't know where to start, but there are some amazing online resources for people that want to volunteer that can help you to find ways to be supportive and it is super easy to do. The best place to start if you are Australian is to hop onto the govolunteer.com.au website. You can put in your postcode and it will list all of the volunteering opportunities that are coming up in your local area and you can even refine your searches to chose the days, times and types of volunteer activities that you would like to participate in. Once you have found an opportunity that suits you, you just put in an expression of interest to the organisation and you're on your way to making a difference. 
However, if getting involved in something big or organisational isn't your bag, then that's okay too because there are always things that need to be done on a small scale that are no less meaningful or important. You do not need to be making grand or sweeping gestures to be making a difference in the lives of others or showing that you care about the needs of others. In fact, if you really start to listen to the people that are around you everyday in your immediate community, you will find that there are actually opportunities to offer support an help in simple and yet very meaningful ways all of the time. 
Do you know of a tired parent in need a childminder so that they can go and have a coffee with a friend or have an interrupted haircut? Does an exhausted friend need a meal cooked for them and a sympathetic ear? Does a sad co-worker need to be told how amazing they are and what a terrific job they do? Does your elderly neighbour need their lawn mowed? Does your partner deserve a back rub? Have you told your children or your parents how much you appreciate them? There are millions of ways that we can be taking care of others everyday, and more often than not it costs very little of your time, effort and money to do so. 
And the best thing of all about caring for others is that is so good for your soul and your own sense of wellbeing. Start with something small, a random act of kindness or an act of support to someone in your community, and keep building on it. If everyone that was able to offer just a little of themselves every week to help someone else in need, can you imagine what a marvellous world we would live in and how terrifically supported we would all feel? Pay a little of your time, love and/or money forward this week to someone else and enjoy the feeling of knowing that you are making a difference, helping out someone in need, doing something meaningful and contributing to something a whole lot bigger than yourself. 

I love women, I think that they are just amazing. Super resilient, smart, courageous and able to deliver new life into the world, women have really got it all going on! When it comes to feminism I very loudly approve. I am willing to march for other women, fight for women's equality and give anyone that says that women aren't as good, worthy or adept as men a very stern fuck off! Basically, I support feminism and equal rights for women on every front, but lately I have noticed that feminism has taken a rather strange turn. 
Lately, I have noticed that statements like 'lack of sisterhood' have been used to shame some women when they aren't willing to support every other woman on the planet. Some stupid and ridiculous women are actually expecting that just because we all have vaginas that we should be part of a 'sisterhood' that supports each other no matter what! And to that concept I say - no way!  Why do I say that? Well because, some women are quite frankly dreadful human beings. They say terrible things, they do terrible things and they do not deserve to be supported by other women. In short, some women are not doing anything to make the women's equal rights movement any stronger and they are not nice people.
Any woman that expects other women to look a certain way, or endorses a product that holds women to unrealistic standards or props up bullshit prejudices and narrow-mindedness in men, is not someone that I am going to call my sister. I will not support women that demonstrate bias, bitch about other women in derogatory ways or perform any services or acts that take away from women being perceived as equal, worthy or important. This doesn't mean that I don't value feminism or sisterhood or think that we should not support other women. What it does mean is that I hold all women accountable for their behaviours, just as I do for men, and if you're a horrible women then I'm sorry, but I'm not going to support you just because we both have the same genitals.  A vagina is not a Get Out of Jail Free Card!
There is a huge difference between feminism and being accountable, and no genuine feminist would ever seek to gain power through shame or manipulation. Feminists do not expect women to fit a certain mould or hate men,  feminists just want equal rights, and that I do support wholeheartedly. I will not support women that constantly put men down, imply that they are stupid or insinuate that all men are shithouse. Not all men are shithouse, and saying that does not make me anti-feminist. Not all women are nice either, and that also doesn't make me anti-feminist, it makes me a realist and I am only going to support what I believe to be sensical, fair and equitable.
Where has our common sense gone on this topic? There can never be a sisterhood if some sisters are actually the equivalent of the ebola virus for feminism. Sorry ladies, you're actually not all fabulous, some of you are just horrid, insidious, manipulative turds that are a smear on the face of feminism. Fortunately, there aren't too many of you and for the most part women are, as I said earlier, completely bloody amazing and capable of doing anything that they put their minds to.

One of the things that I do enjoy most about a mid-winter break is the ability to catch up on some late night viewing and couch potato antics without any guilty feelings whatsoever. Not having to get up and go to work in the morning allows me to indulge in the pleasure of watching entire seasons of television programs and back to back movies, and honestly it is just heaven. With a good strong coffee in hand, a couple of fluffed up pillows and a cosy blanket, I have managed to wonderfully while away many of my holiday evenings in front of the idiot box and I am more than happy to share my joyful at home viewing highlights with you, should you also wish to indulge in some quality lounge room viewing. 

As far as television goes, there has been no shortage of high quality, engaging programming to get completely lost in this year. I have watched a tonne of television this year, more than I ever have before and a lot of it has been of a really high standard as well. The best that I have seen and would highly recommend so far this year are: (in no particular order) 
Escape at Dannemora (Stan) - dramatisation
Sally 4Ever (HBO - Foxtel) - comedy
After Life (Netflix) - comedy drama
Les Miserables (BBC - Foxtel) - period drama
Game of Thrones - S8 (HBO - Foxtel) - fantasy drama
American Gods S2 (Amazon Prime) - fantasy drama
What We Do in the Shadows (FX - Foxtel) - horror comedy 
This Country (Stan) - comedy mockumentary 
Forever (Amazon Prime) - fantasy drama
Killing Eve s2 (ABC iview) - crime drama
The Last O.G. S2 (Stan) - comedy 
The Let Down S2 (ABC iview) - comedy 
Bad Omens (Amazon Prime) - fantasy drama
Detectorists S3 (ABC iview)  - comedy 
Gentleman Jack (HBO - Foxtel) - period drama
Bridget & Eamon (Amazon Prime) - comedy 
Euphoria (HBO - Foxtel) - drama
Chernobyl (HBO - Foxtel) - dramatisation 
The Act: Dee Dee and Gypsy Rose (Hulu - Foxtel) - dramatisation 
Perpetual Grace (Stan) - art house 
Big Little Lies S2 (HBO - Foxtel) - drama
Stranger Things S3 (Netflix)  - science fiction

To be honest, quality movies to view at home have been a little thinner on the ground, but it is often quite hard for me to find things that I haven't already seen on streaming channels because I go to the movies so often. Seth and I have been trawling through a lot of classic horror, which SBS on demand has an excellent selection of, should you need to sate a yearning for retro horror like The Texas Chainsaw Massacre, Halloween, Hellraiser or Scanners. Aside from that Amazon Prime has the largest B grade horror library that I have ever encountered, admittedly it is mostly shit, but you can find the odd retro gem in there as well like Night of the Living Dead, Carrie,  Zombieland and the Friday the 13th Series. 
However, without further ado, here is a list of the best movies that I have watched on the couch (not at the cinema) this year so far: (again listed in no particular order)
Film Stars Don't Die in Liverpool - Netflix (Romance) 
It's Actually a Funny Story - Netflix (Drama)
Suspiria - Amazon Prime (Horror) 
Hush - Netflix (Horror) 
Tully - Netflix (Drama)
The Poughkeepsie Tapes - Stan (Gritty) 
Observance - Amazon Prime (Horror)
American Animals - Foxtel (Crime) 
I am Mother - Netflix (Sci-Fi) 
Pin Cushion - SBS on demand (Gritty) 
Mandy - Foxtel (Horror) 
Full reviews of all of these films can be found on the corresponding genre lists in the drop down menu above if you're looking for more information.
Happy viewing my friends! 

Spicywatch.com has just turned 5, hip hip hooray Spicywatch! Apart from my family and friends, I don't think that I have poured this much of my spare time and energy consistently into anything before, and for as long as I can remember, I don't feel like I have loved or enjoyed pouring my spare time into anything as much as I have loved sharing Spicywatch with all of you wonderful readers. 
Watching and reviewing movies is not just a hobby for me anymore, it is an important part of my life now. For five years I have shared my thoughts, my opinions and my passion for cinema with you all, and so far I have managed to review 790 movies that I honestly believe are worthy of your time and effort to view. I look forward to one day having 1,000 movies on my Spicywatch genre lists that are worthy of your time, but it will take me quite a few more years to get that far. 
Last nights celebrations were focused on the Best Music Moments in Cinema, which is a broad topic, but extremely fun one to investigate. Musicals were most welcome, but not mandatory, and as it turned out, there are actually a huge number of movies that have very significant and memorable music scenes in them that are actually completely non-musical movies. 
My wonderful and supportive friends and family gathered in Enfield to share a drink and their cinematic loves with me; and we laughed, sang and got our groove on to some of the most unexpected (but mostly excellent) musical moments that we could find.
And here is the extensive list of best music moments in cinema (from every genre) as chosen by my nearest and dearest, that made it to the Spicywatch 5th Birthday celebration screening in my living room last night:
Baby Driver (Bellbottoms) 
Pulp Fiction (You Never Can Tell) 
Beetlejuice (Banana Boat Song) 
The Skeleton Twins (Nothings Gonna Stop Us Now) 
Ferris Bueller's Day Off (Twist and Shout) 
Coraline (Garden Scene composed by Peter Corrigan) 
Pretty in Pink (If You Leave) 
The Perks of Being  a Wallflower (Heroes) 
Napoleon Dynamite (Canned Heat) 
Little Miss Sunshine (Super Freak)
Straight Outta Compton (Boyz N Da Hood) 
The Blues Brothers (Shake Your Tail Feather) 
Two Hands (These Days) 
American Psycho (Hip to be Square) 
The Lion King (Circle of Life) 
The Secret Life of Walter Mitty (Space Oddity) 
The Hunt for the Wilderpeople (Ricky's Birthday Song) 
Guardians of the Galaxy (Mr Blue Sky) 
Moulin Rouge (Come What May) 
Mean Girls (Jingle Bell Rock) 
Trainspotting (Lust for Life) 
Sound of Music (Edelweiss) 
Reservoir Dogs (Stuck in the Middle) 
O Brother Where Art Thou? (I Am a Man of Constant Sorrow)
Risky Business (Old Time Rock and Roll) 
Easy A (A Pocketful of Sunshine) 
The Mask (Cuban Pete)
Nacho Libre (Encarnacion) 
Hedwig and the Angry Inch (Origins of Love) 
The Big Lebowski (Just Dropped In) 
Pitch Perfect (Riff off) 
Purple Rain (Title Track) 
Love Actually (Jump) 
Bridesmaids (Hold on) 
Little Fish (Flame Trees) 
Slumdog Millionaire (Jai Ho)
Indiana Jones and the Temple of Doom (Anything Goes) 
Singing in the Rain (Title track)
And one of my all time favourites: Mulholland Drive (Llorando/ Crying) 

Every woman knows that when you become a mother you have to relinquish some of your...how can I put this....firmness? I know that with each child that I had things on my body got more saggy, a lot more stripy (stretch marks - the untold horror of pregnancy) and generally a lot softer and plumper. I put on around 5 kilos with each of my children that I have never been able to lose and I have a caesarean scar from my second pregnancy that an Ob Gyn once called 'distressingly large' and even encouraged me to sue for malpractice over, so yeah I have sacrificed some of my youthful suppleness and beauty for my children. And I suppose that I always knew that there would be physical sacrifices that came with being pregnant, that much I was ready for. 
What I wasn't as prepared for was something that seems to happen to women around 45 years of age when they just suddenly become completely invisible to everyone. I am not even kidding, this shit really does happen and unless you look like Michelle Pfeiffer or some other waif like middle aged hottness, then odds are that it will happen to you too. You literally become unseen by everyone, not just men, everyone. Women, children and men will no longer see you unless you instigate the exchange and even then their interest will wane much faster than it did when you were young. 
Thankfully, this is not just a phenomenon that I alone have experienced but in recent polls 43% of women around 45 years of age claim to experience the same effect, a feeling of being invisible. So even though women are generally looking fitter and more youthful in their 40's and 50's than they ever have before in history, they are still falling victim to the dreaded 'ghost' effect that occurs around 45.
Well, it turns out that there is some research being done around this very topic, and there does appear to be contributing factors to these feelings of invisibility that women seem to experience. An analysis was completed that looked at 414 popular scripted movies and TV shows that aired during one year (from September 2014 to August 2015). From that data it was found that men made up 80% of the characters over 40, leaving only 20% to females, and many of those women were significantly older than 40. It was also noted that nearly all of the love interest female parts were filled by women in their 20's (often partnered up with men in their 40's) and that the women over 40 that were cast usually got roles as hags, shrews, witches, nags, struggling mothers or grandmothers.
This form of media profiling certainly appears to be part of the problem and not part of a solution, and by only casting twenty somethings or insanely hot thirty somethings in romantic roles, the media is stereotyping what it means to be sexy or physically viable, but it even goes much further than that. When women were asked about attractiveness, over 80% of them said that youth was akin to attractiveness and that they knew that once they were over 40 years old that men would not find them as interesting! How grim is that?  And even worse are the findings that women also admitted that they do not pay as much attention to or go out of their way for women over 40 unless they are seeking advise or selling them a product, which basically means that young women see me as either a counselor or a big misshapen money sack, any bloody wonders I feel like I am invisible! 
This dreadful feeling of invisibility is also why millions of women are now turning to surgery in an attempt to turn back the clocks and be seen again, which is just so sad when you really think about it.  In fact, now that I really think about it, I actually think that it just depends on who you are spending your time with when it comes to being seen. Women around my own age never make we feel invisible and men that are 10-15 years older than me seem pretty damn keen for a chat, so I suppose that it just depends where you are looking for that attention.
​A 40 something women is never going to stand out in a nightclub full of skimpy-dressed hotties and that kind of invisible is fine with me anyway. Who knows? Perhaps being invisible to young people and middle aged men is a really a super-power and something to be enjoyed, maybe being unseen to leary eyes or unwanted attentions is a blessing. I mean I am not looking for wolf whistles or uninspired conversations with twenty somethings anyway, so I probably shouldn't be complaining. Being unseen and generally unthreatening can certainly be used to one's advantage. Everyone knows that you can get away with almost anything if no-one is ever actually looking at you, and maybe that is not such a bad thing at all! 

Regardless of how amicable, nice, funny, mindful, considerate or generous you are in this life, you are eventually going to come against someone that you just don't like. It may be someone that you're related to, or someone that you work with or someone that has come into your life because they are associated with another person that you know, and you are not going to like this person. They are going to grind your gears and irritate you, they are going to annoy you and because they now exist in your life, you may not always have the choice to avoid them. And this is where you need to employ your best diplomacy and intelligence, and just get along. 
Easier said than done though right? It is pretty hard to get along with someone that really ruffles your feathers and generally gives you the shits, but there are ways to get along, even in the face of great adversity. 
The first thing that you need to accept is that you are not going to like everyone, and also not everyone is  going to like you and that's totally OK. So OK in fact, that's it's practically perfect. Yep, that's right I said practically perfect. We all know that we do our best growing during our darkest times, so the people that we butt up against actually force us to grow in ways that we may not even recognise at the time. I have learnt more about myself through the people that I haven't liked than the ones that I have adored, and that is a fact. I may not want to go and have a BBQ with the people that I don't like, but I can recognise that these annoying individuals are triggering a very real and unpleasant reaction in me, which probably needs further investigation. 
Sometimes the people that annoy me the most are really just people that have very different ideas, points of view or social boundaries to me, which means that we could never really be great friends anyway, but that doesn't mean that I need to treat them like crap, that would be stupid and illogical. Tolerating people that you really don't like very much is a skill that intelligent people have mastered, and I have found in the past  that unintelligent people usually create their own dramas and demise anyway, so there is no need to engage anyone that annoys you any more than is absolutely necessary. 
When dealing with people that you don't like, you absolutely must have a terrific poker face, a really good and convincing one. A face that you can wear over the top of gritted teeth or clenched fists that makes you appear to be calm, open and diplomatic. This is you having self control over your emotions, not stooping to anyone elses levels of behaviour or adopting anyone else's body language; in short you appear to be neutral and in control of yourself. Adopting a good poker face and calm exterior will allow you to gain the upper hand over people that you don't like every time. And if they don't like you, well at least they won't be able to say that you treated them poorly at any point in your exchanges. Mastering your emotional reactions will help you to manage difficult or unpleasant people, even if you only appear that way on the surface, it's always worth doing. 
Sometimes the people that I find most annoying turn out to be people that I have just expected too much from. Just because you have yourself in check, that doesn't mean other people have as well. Expecting people to do as you do, or behave as you behave is just asking for trouble and will only lead to frustration and disappointment. Next time someone gets up your nose, check in and see what it is that you are expecting from them, odds are that it's more than they have the ability to deliver, so adjust your expectations and you'll find that you may not dislike the person as much as you thought that you did. 
And when all else fails and you just cannot stand someone that you have to deal with regularly, then just take a deep breathe, give yourself some space from them as much as you can and take some time to address what it is about that person that is triggering you off so much. Is it an isolated comment? An ongoing action? A lifestyle choice? Or is it just the way that they make you feel? Have you yourself contributed to the bad blood that you have with this person? Is it fixable? Whatever the reason, really analyse whether this person is worth all of the anxiety, stress and energy that you are giving to them. If you think that they are, then you need to take steps to clear the air and move forward in your relationship with them, if you think that they're irrelevant, then just keep that poker face going and get on with things. And always remember that you do not have to get along with everyone and that it's totally OK to find some people as annoying as hell.