Today was National Superhero Day, a day that was actually created by Marvel Comics employees in 1995 to observe and honour superheroes around the world, both real and fictional. It seemed only fitting that in order to celebrate the event that I should go and see the much anticipated Avengers: Endgame movie at the cinema. However, to be fair I probably would've gone to see it this weekend anyway. With over three hours of enthralling, entertaining and emotionally heart wrenching viewing, I managed to spend my entire Sunday afternoon immersed in the world of superheroes, which was no only very fitting but also intensely enjoyable for a geek like me. 
Ever since Christopher Nolan picked up the script for Batman and booted up The Dark Knight trilogy, the world of cinematic superheroes has gone into overdrive, with Marvel, DC and Dark Horse Comics grinding out a multitude of superhero movies that are just as enjoyable for adults as they are for younger generations. Everyone has a favourite superhero, and seeing your favourite immortalized on the big screen is a something that seems to dazzle audiences of all ages, and provides a level of immersion and escapism that most people will line up for hours to experience. 
Today the cinema was absolutely packed to rafters, and even though the movie had opened days ago, the tickets were sold out well in advance and the lines to be seated streamed out into the street. I saw entire families (dads, mums and their children of various ages) all eagerly chatting about their favourite superhero experiences so far as they excitedly anticipated the outcome of the movie. I saw little kids dressed up as Spiderman and Ironman riding high on the shoulders of their fathers that looked just as happy to be there as their children. I heard middle aged women praising the female archetypes in superheroes movies of recent years, commenting on how great they were as role models for their daughters. And I heard the audience clap, cheer, moan in disbelief and even gently sob in the dark over their favourite superheroes as the film transpired. And what I learned from all of this is that the world loves superheroes. They just bloody love them entirely. 
They love them when they win, but they also love them when they fail because their failings make them more human and accessible. They love the idea of their superhero getting up, over and over and over again, regardless of how high the chips may be stacked against them, because it gives them hope to rise up against the odds themselves in a real life scenarios. They love the spirit of a superhero because is it enduring and noble and we all admire those qualities and look up to them, no matter how old we are or who we are.
And we all have our favourite superheroes. We choose our favourites based on their abilities, their skill set and maybe we even choose who our favourites are based on who we aspire to be more like, or who may have shared a similar life experience to our own. Whatever the reason, it is clear to me that people love superheroes and they love to go and see them on the big screen. I know I do, I was seriously looking forward to seeing the final Avengers instalment today, and what can I say? Well, it certainly did not disappoint that's for sure! 

That time has rolled around again, the time for me to collate all of my viewing efforts and put forward my recommendations for the best viewing choices of 2018. As I have mentioned before, quality television really dominated my time this year and I gave more 5 Chilli Pepper ratings to TV series than I gave to movies this year. To be honest, overall I do feel that the quality of movies this year was not as strong as it was in 2017, and I feel like I watched a lot more mediocre movies than I did last year as well, but sometimes that happens. 
In total I viewed 253 movies in 2018 and 133 TV series (some of which had several seasons). I have watched programs across every genre, and I can honestly say that there were excellent offerings in all of those genres in both movies and television. This year I am not going to list my least favorite viewings for 2018 because I have made myself a new years resolution to be more positive and to not focus on the negative things, so to list the worst things I saw in 2018 would be counterproductive to that resolution. Besides, as I have said before, even if I didn't love it, doesn't mean that someone else won't or that it is rubbish. At the end of the day, even the movies that we don't really enjoy have required a lot of time, money and effort to be produced; to shit on someone else's dream or vision is a pretty lousy thing to do, so I am choosing not to go there. 
I hope that you find something on these lists that you have not seen yet and can hopefully now explore. For full reviews of all of the recommended movies below, just go to the appropriate genre tab at the top of the page.
So without any further ado, here are my TOP MOVIE CHOICES (2018 release):  

• ROMA - Foreign 4.5 Chilli Peppers
• Hereditary - Horror 4.5 Chilli Peppers 
• Beautiful Boy - Drama 4.5 Chilli Peppers 
• Isle of Dogs - Kid Friendly 4.5 Chilli Peppers
• BlacKkKlannsman  - Drama 4 Chilli Peppers 
• A Star in Born - Romance 4 Chilli Peppers 
• The Tale - Gritty 4 Chilli Peppers 
• Paddington 2 - Kid Friendly 4 Chilli Peppers 
• Avengers: Infinity War -  Super 4 Chilli Peppers 
• The Ballad of Buster Scruggs - Art House 4 Chilli Peppers 
• Upgrade - Science Fiction/ Action 4 Chilli Peppers  
• John Leguizamo: Latin History for Morons - Documentary 4 Chilli Peppers 

HONORABLE MENTIONS:

• A Quiet Place - Sci-Fi/ Horror 3.5 Chilli Peppers
• Annihilation - Sci-Fi 3.5 Chilli Peppers
• Black Panther - Super 3.5 Chilli Peppers
• Ready Player One - Fantasy 3.5 Chilli Peppers
• The Breaker Upperers - Comedy 3.5 Chilli Peppers
• Searching - Crime 3.5 Chilli Peppers
• Game Night - Comedy 3.5 Chilli Peppers
• Love, Simon - Romance 3.5 Chilli Peppers
• Bohemian Rhapsody - Drama 3.5 Chilli Peppers
• Blockers - Comedy 3.5 Chilli Peppers

Here are my top recommendations for pre- 2018 releases that I didn't see until 2018: 

• Three Billboards Outside Ebbing, Missouri - Drama 5 Chilli Peppers (Hall of Fame)
• Bright Star - Romance 4.5 Chilli Peppers
• Wind River - Drama 4 Chilli Peppers
• Good Time - Drama 4 Chilli Peppers 
• The Shape of Water - Fantasy 4 Chilli Peppers 
• Coco - Kid Friendly 4 Chilli Peppers 
• Mudbound - Drama 4 Chilli Peppers
• Call Me by Your Name  - Romance 4 Chilli Peppers 
• Ingrid Goes West - Drama 4 Chilli Peppers 
• Beasts of No Nation - Gritty 4 Chilli Peppers 
• The Tunnel - Foreign 4 Chilli Peppers 

BEST TELEVISION SERIES of 2018: 

• Master of None S2 - Comedy/ Drama 5 Chilli Peppers 
• One Strange Rock - Documentary 5 Chilli Peppers
• Atlanta S2 - Drama 5 Chilli Peppers
• Sharp Objects - Crime 5 Chilli Peppers
• Patrick Melrose - Drama 5 Chilli Peppers
• Kidding - Drama 4.5 Chilli Peppers
• Who is America? - Comedy/ Documentary 4.5 Chilli Peppers
• Here and Now - Drama 4.5 Chilli Peppers
• Maniac - Sci-Fi 4.5 Chilli Peppers
• Lemony Snicket's a Series of Unfortunate Events S2 - Fantasy/ Kid Friendly 4.5 Chilli Peppers 
• Mosaic - Crime 4 Chilli Peppers
• The End of the Fucking World S1 - Crime 4 Chilli Peppers
• Dirk Gently S2 - Fantasy 4 Chilli Peppers
• Barry S1 - Crime/ Drama 4 Chilli Peppers
• AHS - Apocalypse - Horror 4 Chilli Peppers
• Mr Inbetween - Crime 4 Chilli Peppers
• Salt, Fat, Acid, Heat - Documentary 4 Chilli Peppers
• Just Another Immigrant - Comedy  4 Chilli Peppers
• Mr Mercedes S1 - Crime  4 Chilli Peppers
• Wanderlust - Drama  4 Chilli Peppers
• The Miracle - Foreign  4 Chilli Peppers
• Anne with an E S2 - Drama 4 Chilli Peppers

HONORABLE MENTIONS:

• Britannia S1 - Fantasy 3.5 Chilli Peppers 
• Ash vs Evil Dead S3 - Horror/ Comedy 3.5 Chilli Peppers 
• Swedish Dicks S2 - Comedy/ Crime 3.5 Chilli Peppers 
• Future Man - Sci-Fi/Comedy 3.5 Chilli Peppers 
• GLOW S2 - Drama 3.5 Chilli Peppers 
• The Detectorists S2 - Comedy/ Drama 3.5 Chilli Peppers 
• Sabrina the Teenage Witch - Horror 3.5 Chilli Peppers 
• Wellington Paranormal - Horror/Comedy 3.5 Chilli Peppers 
• The Kominsky Method - Drama/ Comedy 3.5 Chilli Peppers 

Another year is drawing to a close and what a wonderful year it has been for me. There have been so many highlights and so many special events, holidays and celebrations that I have been able to share with my family, my friends and my work colleagues this year that it is hard to know where to start. 2018 has truly been a year filled with great blessings, personal growth and many, many smiles.
I really like to make a list of the highlights of a year as it draws to close because it is so easy to forget just how many joyful things you do and get to be apart of; and how much you have achieved if you don't take stock on some level.  I always feel so deeply overwhelmed whenever I look back at everything that I have achieved and shared throughout the year and reflecting on a year is a really lovely thing to do that really helps you to count your blessings and focus on the abundance in your life. 
Here are my favourite highlights from 2018, all of which have brought me a great deal of joy, a sense of belonging, a feeling of enrichment and have provided me with many memories to reflect upon during the quieter and more contemplative times of the year. 

JANUARY:  Zoe and Lachlainn's engagement, Seth's 13th birthday, Jubilee Lake Picnic in Daylesford, Australia Day Fireworks, BBQ's and Drinks on the Enfield deck, TRUE - 30 days of Yoga program, Started my new job adventures. 
FEBRUARY: Chinese New Year- the Year of the Dog,  Rockabilly Festival, dinner and coffee dates with friends, Curry/movie night get togethers kicked off. 
MARCH: White Night Festival, International Women's Day, Cooking Day at Enfield  with friends, My Birthday, Jesus Christ Superstar, The Begonia Festival, The Arts Trail, the Egg Painting session at Enfield on Easter Saturday.
APRIL: Craig's Birthday, Eating Hot Cross Buns and good quality Chocolate on Easter Sunday, Dinner Parties, the Autumn School Holiday Break, Movie Nights at Enfield with mates, Apple and Quince harvesting. 
MAY: Mother's Day, The Festival of Light at the Great Stupa in Bendigo, a Daylesford Chocolate Mill visit, meeting Daniel Kish (aka. The Batman- echolocation expert), Spicywatch's 4th Birthday.
JUNE: Zoe's 21st Birthday, Winter Solstice Celebrations, Mushrooming, Completing my Level One Braille Qualification, Weekend Breakfast Dates with friends, the Winter School Holidays.
JULY: Alice in Wonderland at ACMI, Winter Movie Marathon nights, Flashy Cocktails and Long Lunches with my friends, When I Grow Up Art Exhibition, All day Baking and Soup making Sessions, Prospects dinners, eating Homemade Apple Pie with my Family. 
AUGUST:  Dinner parties, Dress-up Events at School (Book Week, 100 days of School, PJ day), committing to 30 days of 30 minutes of extra exercise (which I have continued with ever since).
SEPTEMBER: Father's Day, Seeing the Showcase Performance at school, Commencing 20 minutes of daily Transcendental Meditation (have also continued with this all year), the Spring School Holiday Break.
OCTOBER: Halloween horror movie/ dinner night, Rediscovered the joy of the local Botanical Gardens, School trip to Melbourne Zoo, Landcare Open Day, Cocktail and Perfume Night at The Lost Ones.
NOVEMBER: Bonfire Night, Anniversary weekend at Skenes Creek, Dinner Dates and Movie Nights, Sunday afternoon Live Music at Smythesdale Pub. 
DECEMBER: Dinner Party with friends, Having a KK to spoil and one that spoilt me as well, Staff Christmas function, Student Graduation, the Foundation Team Dinner, Summer Holidays kicking off, Christmas Day, Champagne Breakfasts, Reuniting with my nephew. 

Seriously, it has been the best year, I have so many things to be grateful for and so many reasons to celebrate what a wonderful life I have. On top of all of that, Spicywatch hit 11,000 return readers this month and I cannot tell you how wonderful it is to think that people are not only reading my blog and reviews, but are returning for more, it is just incredible to me. I am truly thankful to each and every Spicywatch reader for their continual check ins to my website, for their beautiful comments and their amazing support throughout the year. 
May 2019 bring you all much peace, much happiness and an abundance of all of the best things in life. I look forward to delivering more reviews and movie information to you all in 2019 and sharing my personal life experiences with you along the way as well.
Happiest of New Year's wishes to you all, may your resolutions be fulfilled, your hearts be full and your hangovers minimal; may you discover many new, enjoyable challenges and rewards in the new year and I hope that 2019 allows you to find your groove in all things,
Sending all of my love to you,
Happy New Year,
From Spicywatch xx

I love stories about magic, especially ones about witches, wizards, warlocks and far off enchanted lands. I have always been, for as far back as I can remember, completely allured by tales that involve witchcraft, magic and wizardry, which probably makes me the biggest geek in the world, but I don't care, they're awesome! I have spent many hours of my life absorbed in otherworldly realms, and I do not regret a single moment that I have spent in those places escaping the predictability of my  regular life. 
I suppose that I have always felt like there was quite a bit of magic that really does exist in the world, and the idea of there being a lot more of it going on than the average muggle could ever see has always excited me even further. As an adult reading the Harry Potter series, I was overwhelmed with joy to be losing myself in a world steeped in magic and mystery every time a new book came out, and although I love to read books and watch movies of all kinds, magical ones will always have a special place in my heart.
My first encounter with any kind of magical being came in the form of a troll from the story of The Three Billy Goats Gruff. It was a tale that my father would read to me as a small child, and it terrified me completely. The very idea of some troll living under a bridge that could jump up and snatch anyone off the bridge as they passed by was really scary as a child, and in the book he was described as having huge hands, a long nose like a broomstick and eyes as big as saucers. The image that accompanied the story in the book that we had was truly horrid and I was shit scared of it. I had an unspoken fear of bridges for years because of that book. However, in spite of how horrid that troll was, he did ignite an interest in the unseen world for me and once ignited, that interest never went out.
And so I began my love affair with magical escapism, and escape I did. I escaped during my lunch breaks in primary school, I escaped in my bedroom as a child, I escaped in the garden as a pre-teen and I even escaped in my nana's chook shed as a preschooler. As a child I escaped as often as I could and whenever I could, and literature was my main source of escapism; but it certainly didn't end there. 
As an adult I escaped to the much more potent world of real life escapism, and I found that in practises of the occult. Now before you get any ideas about chasing me down with pitchforks, you really need to calm down, it was a long while ago and I hung my broom and cloak up years ago, so there's no need to panic. At first I just started with dabbling in crystals, chakras and auras, which are pretty fluffy forms of occultism, and then eventually I moved on to using tarot cards and eventually graduated to spellcrafting. No, I wasn't beheading chickens or casting pentagrams of blood, it wasn't anything that extreme, it was purely experimental, mostly performed with curiosity and certainly non-violent in its makings.
However, let me assure you all, that what I did discovered through all of this 'escapism' is that there most certainly are unseen and hidden things in this world, and they are far happier being left the fuck alone! So don't even bother purchasing a ouija board or attempting to summon up spirits because you are most certainly not Sabrina the Teenage Witch, and crafting is most definitely not for meddlers. My advice is, stick to the movies, TV and literature, it is a far more fun, hassle-free and relaxing way to access magical escapism and there is no risk of biting off more than you can chew because you can just switch it off when you've had your fill!

Growing up, it's a pretty overrated thing to do if you ask me. You only get to be a kid for around 18 years (although to be honest it is probably more like 15 years these days because the pressures, decision making and expectations start really early for kids now) and then after that, you're an adult - for the rest of your life! And being a 'grown up' is mostly just one big mix of constant responsibility and expectation, and although there is a lot of emotional intelligence that comes with being an adult, a lot of the other stuff is not nearly as fun as I imagined that it would be when I was a child. 
As a child I just wanted to grow up to look as hot as one of those sexy chicks from ABBA and wear really cool clothes, drink coloured liquids from flashy glasses and wear lurid make-up, because that is what cool adults appeared to be doing when I was growing up. I imagined that adult life would be uber cool, carefree and would basically resemble one big unending party of awesomeness where you got to eat whatever you wanted to and drink alcohol and dance the night away every night of the week; which I suppose that you can do as an adult if you don't have any real responsibilities. But who the hell has no real responsibilities? A Kardashian? No, not even a Kardashian, because I am pretty sure that even they probably do have things to get done as well! Seriously, a completely carefree adult life is pretty much a total pipe dream because all adults (even the really rich and famous ones) have responsibilities.
​Unfortunately, as a child, adults never tell you about all of the incredible responsibility and expectation to succeed that comes with being a grown up, but they really should.  I know that I wouldn't have been in a such a damn rush to grow up if I had known how difficult it was to be an adult for the rest of my life. I wish that I had had a realistic idea of what being an adult looked like, because it looks nothing like ABBA or high fashion for me or most of the other adults that I know. 
Most adults that I know are often running around on empty, looking and behaving in a pretty un-glamourous state most of the time. They are often worrying about money or their employment whilst trying hard to juggle their social, private and professional lives and many of them often claim to feel utterly overwhelmed with responsibility. Now if someone had of told me about that, and the realities of how you feel after partying every night, then I would not have rushed through my brief childhood years wishing that I was a grown up.
On the contrary, I think that I would have milked the shit out of being a kid for a bit longer! I like to think that I have still reserved some level of childlike whimsy in my life, but  let's not bullshit ourselves here, no almost 45 year old woman can get away with claiming their 'childlike whimsy' without raising a few eyebrows, it's considered too weird, even for the most open minded of us. And even though we all know how tough it is to be an adult and how much we all need respite from all of the pressure and responsibility of being an adult, we still willingly deny ourselves the opportunity to a embrace our childlike whimsy, which is pretty sad really. And not only  do we deny ourselves of it, we also frown upon other adults that are doing it because it is considered to be a bit on the kooky side. 
Well, if you know that you are doing that, than you need to stop doing it immediately. All adults need to not only keep a sense of childlike whimsy in their lives, but they need to reconnect with that part of themselves that believes that life can be carefree and fun, like we all believed it was when we were children. If you allow your life to get too bogged down in responsibility and expectation, then you stop really living and you just start surviving, and life is not meant to be survived, it is meant to be lived. Lived like you lived it as a child, without constant worry and concern, but with a sense of being in the moment and grabbing as much fun out of every minute along the way as you can. 
You may not be able to do it everyday, but on some days, you most certainly still can. You can still do loads of the things that will make you forget about your adult concerns for a minute and just be in the moment, you just have remember how to do it. Most of us forgotten how good it feels to forget our troubles and responsibilities and just cut loose. It is totally okay to dance all night long, or run in the grass, or drink coloured drinks from fancy glasses, or fly a kite, or climb a tree, or skip with a rope, or sing at the top of your voice when no-one is around.....or to just feel alive. That childlike whimsy may not be something that you feel particularly connected to any more, but you can't let go of your inner child, not ever. Your ability to reconnect to the wonder and free abandon of your inner child will help you to recognise how important it is to let go from time to time. 
​Allow yourself a bit of time to be childlike again, you'll be surprised how good it feel to not be in an adult mindset for a spell. Being an adult has it's rewards, but being in touch with your childlike whimsy is exceptionally rejuvenating and I highly recommend a break from adulting whenever you get the chance. 

CORALINE 
Release Date: 2009
Rating: PG
Running Time: 100 mins
Based on the Neil Gaiman novella of the same name, this stop-motion realisation is a dark little tale indeed. Having also read the book, I was delighted to see that none of the magic or the macabre had been watered down, but this is definitely not a movie for smaller children and parents should heed its PG rating. 
When curious Coraline finds another world that is a strange and yet more exciting version of her own, she thinks she has hit the jackpot. But things are not as they seem in this other world and something sinister is at play. 
Under Henry Selick's direction (Nightmare Before Christmas and James and the Giant Peach) you are going to get creepy undertones and deep metaphors, but you'll also get intelligent children's cinema, so hooray for that - I loved it!
FINAL SAY: I don't want buttons for eyes!
4 Chilli Peppers ​

Getting angry is a normal part of life. Everyone has a tipping point and it is okay to feel pissed off or annoyed from time to time. However, being angry all of the time is not only dreadful for you and everyone else around you, it is also really bad for your health and wellbeing and has been linked to all kinds of diseases and ongoing mental illnesses. Eliminating as much anger and stress from your life is something that everyone should make a priority and although I am certainly no expert on the issue, I have learned how to reduce my own anger substantially over the last few years by enlisting a few simple things into my daily routine.  
Firstly and foremost, I cannot speak highly enough of yoga and meditation when it comes to assisting people to manage their stress and anger levels. If you are looking to zen out your life, then you need to be going within because that's where you'll find your inner strength and peace. Mindfulness, relaxation, self care and creative practises have all been linked to the improvement of mental health, concentration, cognitive flexibility and coping abilities, and we all need more of that good stuff in our busy lives. However, if you are angry or stressed a lot of the time than you really need it and I cannot advocate for these practises enough, they have really turned my life around over the last few years and I am more calm and in control of my life than I have ever been before.
I also adopted a personal mantra earlier this year, which I know sounds extremely corny, but it has really worked wonders for me. I tell myself this mantra whenever I find myself getting overwhelmed, upset or disappointed with situations, actions or people. It is a mantra that is simple and yet extremely effective in calming me down and helping me to get my head back into the right place when I find myself steering off course and getting bogged down in other people's bullshit.
I like to whisper it to myself and take a couple of deep breaths as I do, which is I know is slightly reminiscent of the Goosfraba chant from the movie Anger Management, but what can I say, my mantra works and it has saved me from a lot of heartache, stress and possibly explosive moments on numerous occasions. My mantra is simply:

​        I am only responsible for myself and my behaviour.

I cannot tell you how many times I have reminded myself of this and how liberating it is to think in this way. The only thing that you will ever have 100% control of is you. Your words, your behaviour, your thoughts and your actions. When you start to accept that mantra as an absolute truth, it is not only liberating for your own stress and anger levels, but it also allows you to become liberated from other people's stress and anger. You don't have to take on anyone else's stuff as your own, because it is not yours, it is theirs; and they have to be responsible for their behaviour. 
I do highly recommend finding a personal mantra that works for you and trying it out when you find yourself in particularly stressful situations or when you feel your anger levels tweaking. We all deserve to live peaceful and harmonious lives and it is a challenge to not get bogged down in this busy and often insensitive world so why not try to manage your own anxiety in peaceful ways? You never know how zen you can get until you try. 

Although turning 21 isn't quite as important as it used to be in the old days, there's still something pretty exciting about the day that you finally become a 'real' adult. Sure kids become adults at 18, but everyone knows that they are still mostly under construction. It isn't until you turn 21 that the world suddenly realises that you really are an adult and with that realisation people finally start to listen to you when you speak and respect you as a functioning member of society.
And I suppose that it is also around 21 that people start to expect that you will somewhat have your shit together and have some idea about what about you what you want to do with your life, but everyone also really knows that this is rarely ever the case. 
Our Zoe turned 21 yesterday. I cannot believe that 21 years of her life have already gone by, it certainly doesn't feel like it has been that long since I screamed the hospital down giving birth to her all those years ago. And what an amazing adult she has become, so very smart and also beautiful, Zoe has become more of the type of woman that we want in our society than I could have ever hoped that she would be. Strong, funny, ambitious, kind and compassionate, our girl sure does have it all. She has lived away from home for almost three years and during that time I have watched her blossom into the fine independent woman that I know and love so dearly, I just couldn't be more proud of my daughter, she is a constant source of wonder and inspiration to me. 
On top of everything else, Zoe is also on the verge of graduating University this year, she has become a coordinator for the YMCA and coaches competitive gymnastics squads, she got engaged earlier this year to her long term sweetheart Lachlainn and she has now also turned 21; it's been a pretty big year for our darling Zoe. And she never fails to visit us here in Enfield every other week, chat on the phone to me twice a week and always have a smile on her face when I see her. What's not to love about this kid? She's is an absolute sweetheart, inside and out, and Craig, Seth and I, well we just bloody love her stupid and thank our lucky stars that we have managed to get someone so wonderful batting on our team. 
Being the generous soul that she is, Zoe didn't want a 21st birthday party this year, she wanted to for us all to go on a holiday together for her birthday. She wanted us to have some quality travel and family time together before she commits to full time employment and a house mortgage or any of that other life stuff that will get in the way of travel and spending money. So that's what we are doing, we are all going away to New Zealand in January together to celebrate not only Zoe's 21st birthday, but also how wonderful it is to be a part of a family that love and care for each other. Which has given us all something fantastic to look forward to over the summer break and something to save our money towards. 
So happy 21st birthday my darling Zoe, I hope that the years ahead are kind to you, I wish all of the best things in abundance for you and please know that we will always be there for you, a million hugs and kisses from your adoring family for your special day xxxx.
​PS. Couldn't resist putting in a review of a movie that we have watched a hundred times over together. 

It is important to have some routine in your life. A repeated pattern and commitment to following a routine can actually be really healthy and exceptionally beneficial. Routine allows time for the cultivation of ritual into your life and is the best way to ensure continual growth with whatever it is that you are putting your energies into. If you want to make positive changes in your life, you really do need to enlist a bit of self discipline and have the ability to follow a certain amount of routine.
I have managed to make some significant changes to my life over the past couple years and it has only been possible through routine and ritual. I actually prefer to use the word ritual over routine. Routine sounds so damn boring, laborious and repetitious, whereas ritual sounds like something profoundly soulful and spiritually aware. Whenever I attempt to take on something new, try to rid myself of an old habit or I'm just try to find more meaning in the mundane, I always like to look at the work ahead as the cultivating of a new ritual into my life. An undertaking that will essentially improve me and make me stronger, better, faster and wiser in mind, body and spirit. 
It is through this holistic way of thinking that I have been able to create several daily rituals that have allowed me to master many things that I never thought that I would be able to do; things that I probably would have laughed about if someone had told be that I would be doing them a few years ago. Quitting smoking, getting up earlier everyday, taking a daily yoga class, meditating, incorporating mindfulness and visualisation techniques into my daily life; all of these things I have managed to cultivate into my daily life through repetition and ritual. 
When you think about it, there is the beauty of ritual in almost everything that we do if we can manage to do it mindfully and with that word 'ritual' at the forefront of our thinking. Eating, cleaning, showering, driving, speaking, working, walking, listening, standing still, brewing tea or even sleeping. The list is absolutely endless, we do most of these things thoughtlessly and on autopilot, but we can get so much more out of what we consider mundane if we just start to see it all as some sacred dance, some magical ritual of the self that we get to celebrate every single day of our lives. 
Take some time to try it for yourself. Create a new ritual where you allow yourself to be lost in the rhythm of your own life. Get up a little earlier, try something new, enjoy the mundane by looking at it all with fresh eyes, it is easy to cultivate and celebrate the ritual of your own life everyday if you allow yourself to. 
The American philosopher and motivational speaker Wayne Dyer once said If you change the way you look at things, the things you look at change, and he is not just some holistic nutter, he is 100% correct. Let every moment matter, let everyday be steeped in something marvellous and let yourself enjoy ritual over routine and before you know it, you'll have a lot more to love about your life as well. 

Anyone that says that G rated movies are just for kids is an absolute frickin' idiot! Especially given the exceptionally high quality of children's movies that have been released over the last five years in particular. The standard and quality of children's cinema has really come a very long way from when I was a kid, and thank God for that because some of the bullshit media propaganda that we were subliminally subjected to as children was downright ridiculous and would never be tolerated by today's standards. 
There were depictions of sexual harassment, racism, homophobia, discrimination and violence in seemingly innocent cartoons from Warner Bros. Looney Tunes and Merrie Melodies that I can recall seeing as a child. Some television programs that I watched regularly as a child like Sesame Street, The Smurfs, Scooby Doo, Captain Planet and even The Muppets have all now been cited as having inappropriate or biased undertones which are thankfully no longer permissible in children's television. 
When you are a kid, you really aren't aware of the subtle undertones or subliminal messaging that you are being fed through seemingly innocent mediums, but as you get older and reflect back, you realise just how much of it that you were actually seeing and taking in on a daily basis and it is quite a disturbing realisation. 
​I know that when I was a girl, all of the Disney princesses were always saved by some kind of Prince Charming character and they all had incredible hair, svelte figures and immaculate grooming. Not one of them was ever capable of avoiding what appeared to be pretty obvious danger in my mind and none of them had the minerals to ever save themselves without male intervention. Generally, all the young female characters were damsels in distress and the older female characters were portrayed as evil witches, cruel stepmothers or rotund and ditzy nanna/ fairy godmother types. The heroes of the stories were always muscular male role models and after they swept in and rescued said 'damsels in distress'  they would promptly marry them and then it was expected that life would go forth happily ever after - END OF STORY.
People often argue that the Disney Princesses Belle and Mulan broke those stereotypical molds for Disney, but I wonder, did they really? I mean lets be honest, Belle had a raging case of Stockholm Syndrome and Mulan had to dress up like a man to be taken seriously, that is not exactly ideal now is it? Sure they were making improvements, but it was not until more recent years that a shift in gender stereotyping really came about.
Disney and Pixar alike have truly cleaned up their act and shifted their 'Princess' focus to more of a 'family bond' focus in recent years and it has been a very welcomed change. Now instead of the worn out and archaic 'Damsel in Distress' trope, we see more self empowered female lead roles in children's cinema. The hero is now often the heroine and the focus on self esteem, self awareness, family values and environmental issues has become far more prevalent. 
It is has now, more than ever before, become completely unfair to say that G rated movies are just for kids, because the standards of storyline, animation and character development in G rated movies is now higher than it has ever been in the past. Children's films really do deserve to get more attention and producers should be praised for their diligence in attempting to teach children about the more important and relevant issues of our current condition rather than just ensuring that the hottie gets to the ball on time to dance with the prince. 

COCO
Release Date: 2017
Rating: G
Running Time: 109 mins 
It seems that the Pixar/ Disney combo cannot put a foot wrong lately and Coco is another fine example of their terrific storytelling abilities and perfectly honed animation skills. Wisely released in Mexico the weekend before Dia de Los Muertos, Coco swiftly became the highest grossing film in Mexico and since then it has continued to receive worldwide praise and award accolades. 
12 year old Miguel's family owns a shoemaking business that has been passed down through the generations. Ever since grandma Coco's father abandoned her and her mother to pursue a musical career, the family have had a strict no music policy and an expectation that all generations will make shoes. However, secretly budding musician Miguel is desperate to enter the local Day of the Dead talent show and is willing to go against his family's wishes to do so, even is it means stealing a guitar from his musical hero Ernesto's mausoleum. By stealing from the dead, Miguel discovers that he has placed a curse upon himself which must be broken by sunrise to be undone. 
This is a heart warming family tale about remembering those that we have lost and treasuring our memories of them. I am a huge sucker for all things Mexican, especially anything to with Dias de Los Muertos, so I just adored this movie and thought that it was a moving and passionate tribute to Mexican culture and their incredible family bonds, both here and in the afterlife. 
FINAL SAY: Never forget how much your family cares for you. 
4 Chilli Peppers ​

There is a line in the song Everybody's Free (to Wear Sunscreen) that says - Do NOT read beauty magazines, they will only make you feel ugly. I have been thinking a lot about that line lately, not because I read beauty magazines because I most certainly do not, but I have really been paying a lot of attention lately to the incredible job that advertising campaigns, the media and the money making 'fat cat' corporations of the world do when it comes to making us regular people feel like we are not enough.
The constant barrage of subliminal and non-subliminal messaging that we are bombarded with on a daily basis is just astronomical, and they all seem to be aimed at making us all believe that we are not conforming, not cutting it or that we are just not very good looking. And, it is not surprising to know, that these constant attempts to make us feel lousy about ourselves have been extremely effective, because not only are we (the consumers) buying more beauty, fitness and diet products than ever before, we also have far lower levels of self confidence about the way that we look and the way that we generally feel about ourselves as well. 
Once you step onto the treadmill of media-fed fear and self loathing, it is a never ending cycle of ugliness. You will catch yourself saying horrible things to yourself like: I am too fat, I need to change, why don't I look like the women in the magazines?....blah ....blah ....blah....and boom, they have won, they have got inside of your head and they have won. They have got you self doubting and not really liking yourself very much anymore, and once that begins, so do the attempts at 'fixing' yourself, and that is damn good for business but not so good for you. 
The path of self improvement is paved with good intentions but so very often it just lines the pockets of very bad people. There is more than one reason that models in beauty magazines are so thin, and it doesn't have a lot to do with looking good, because a lot of them don't really look that good at all in real life, it has everything to do with creating an unattainable and unrealistic ideal that will force us consumers to keep on spending and pushing in some mad pursuit of an unattainable goal. We actually buy in to the idea that some photoshopped, emaciated, plastic surgery victim looks amazing, because we have been programmed to think that fake bodies look great. We sucker ourselves into thinking that being wafer thin, fat lipped, big titted or getting a washboard stomach will complete us and make us more satisfied, and so we spend money willingly to do it. Beauty has become so sad and so removed from reality; and every day more and more people buy into it's glossy and fraudulent ideal. 
And when people can't attain these unrealistic goals, what do they do? Well, they just keep on spending! They spend on binge food, or comfort food or a therapist to try and rebuild their smashed self esteem, but the bottom line is that they spend. And that is all that any of this is about really, money. Beauty magazines, advertisements, campaigns, the media in general, they are all constantly pushing you to reach for your wallet or purse so that you can be more, be better, have more and look amazing. You never see any of them saying, you are perfect just as you are or you don't need to change a thing or you don't need to be any more than you already are; uh of course you don't, that shit doesn't sell! 
I guess what I am trying to say is that yes, beauty magazines will only make you feel ugly, but so will a lot of other things and some people as well, and you have to stand tall against it. Don't let the fat cats win, be true to yourself, love who you are and never believe that anyone in a beauty magazine really looks that amazing in real life; well not every day anyway.
Ignore the haters, enjoy your body, eat well and don't feel like you need to buy anything to be better than you already are. No product can ever replace your own peace of mind or your sense of self worth and you should never sacrifice believing that you are perfect just as you are for any fad, fetish or fanatical behaviour that the media can try and entice you with.
Just be you and be perfectly free, that's about as beautiful as anything can ever get in my mind. 

Seth turned thirteen yesterday. I now have a teenage son, which makes me feel quite old in some ways, but also very proud, because I absolutely adore my son and couldn't be any happier about the young man that he is becoming. 
As usual, Seth celebrated his birthday in the most low key manner that he could think of. One friend to sleepover, a spread of various tacos, a homemade ice-cream cake and plenty of gaming time. Seriously, teenage boys are the most easily pleased creatures on the planet from what I can gather; no fuss, no frills and as a little social interaction as possible and they are completely happy and content. Seth literally wanted nothing for his birthday, he wasn't even a little bit phased about the day at all. You should've heard the awkward conversations leading up to the event, they mostly went something like this: 
Your birthday is coming up buddy, pretty exciting, you're gonna be 13!
Yeah 
Have you thought about how you might like to celebrate it?
Nope.
Would you like to go out for the day?
No I don't think so.
Would you like to go to the pool or the beach?
No.
Would you like a party?
HELL NO!
What would you like me to do for your birthday then?
Nothing really......uhhh....maybe you could make tacos? 
Tacos? Is that what you want to eat for your birthday? You know that you can have anything you want right? 
Yeah, I want tacos.
Okay, anything else? 
No
Cake?
If you want to.
It's your birthday, you will be wanting cake won't you?
I spos.
What sort?
Whatever you like
Whatever you like I think!
Okay, ice cream cake maybe?
Sure, anything else? 
Nope.
Do you want me to invite anyone over or anything?
Maybe, I'll get back to you on that one. 
Okay, well if you think of anything else let me know.
OK.

And that was it, there was no getting back to me, no mention of his birthday again until a couple of days before when I had another go at grilling him. 
So any thoughts on your birthday yet?
Nah
So you aren't going to do anything to celebrate it?
I thought Conor could come over.
Of course
He said he could.
You already asked him?
Yeah.
And?
He said yeah.
So he will come out or will I be picking him up?
He will just come out sometime, his dad will drop him out. He's gonna call you. 
Oh, so it's all sorted?
Yeah.
And that's all you want to do?
Yep. Don't stress mum, it's all good, it's just another birthday.

And that is how it always plays out with Seth, minimal conversation, minimal hassle and as little fuss as possible. I can't say that it is all that weird, I mean he has Craig and I for parents so what can we expect really? Both of our kids are pretty introverted, but Seth is a serious home body that even I cannot compete with. And in spite of his lack of adventure or thirst for stimulation, he had a terrific time on his birthday and said thanks for an awesome day when it was all over. Like I said, teenage boys, they're the easiest species on the planet to please and that can only be seen as a good thing. 

THE BOY AND THE BEAST
Release Date: 2016
Rating: PG
Running Time: 119 mins
A Japanese animated adventure film, written and directed by award winning director Mamoru Hosoda, that won Animation of the Year at the 37th Japan Academy Prizes. The Boy and the Beast also captivated audiences around the world with its unique animation style and creative storytelling. 
A troubled boy stumbles upon an alternate world that is filled with fantastic beasts. A powerful and gruff beast warrior named Kumatetsu, who has been searching for an apprentice, takes the boy on and attempts to train him in the ways of the warrior. 
This is a thoughtfully put together coming of age tale that has plenty of interesting and colourful characters, and enough complications to keep interest levels high. The animation styling here is so good, I loved the overall tone and effect of this film, it was such a pleasing visual undertaking. The Boy and the Beast  was certainly one of the hidden gems of 2016 and is definitely a family movie worthy of your time.  
FINAL SAY: Am I human, or am I a beast?
4 Chilli Peppers ​

It's that time again, the time for me to unleash my viewing loves and loathes for the year of 2017. In total, I watched 279 movies and 62 TV series in 2017, so yeah, it is fair to say that I have a robust addiction to entertainment and that I have a fairly good idea of what is out there.
My biggest undertaking for the year was a rewatch of the entire Lost Series, 121 episodes in total, and although it took me the better part of the entire year to get through, it was worth the effort. Next to the Twin Peaks Reboot, Lost was the next biggest mind fuck of the year for me.
I must say that the bar raises every single year for me because movies and TV are constantly improving in quality and there is a never ending stream of excellent viewing to be had. That makes it a lot harder for me to discern the best,  but also a lot more enjoyable in the long run.
However, without further ado, here are my picks for the best and worst of 2017, my full reviews of these movies can be found on their corresponding genre lists. 
BEST MOVIES OF 2017:

• IT  - Horror  4.5 Chilli Peppers
• A Ghost Story - Art House 4.5 Chilli Peppers
• Mother! - Challenging 4.5 Chilli Peppers
• Blade Runner 2049 - Science Fiction 4.5 Chilli Peppers
• Baby Driver - Action 4 Chilli Peppers
• Dunkirk - War 4 Chilli Peppers
• Guardians of the Galaxy Vol 2 - Fantasy 4 Chilli Peppers
• Logan - Super 4 Chilli Peppers
• Get Out - Horror 3.5 Chilli Peppers
• A Dark Song - Horror 3.5 Chilli Peppers
• T2 - Trainspotting - Drama 3.5 Chilli Peppers
• Logan Lucky - Action/Comedy 3.5 Chilli Peppers

BEST CATCH UP MOVIES OF 2017: (Movies released before 2017 that I finally saw in 2017)

• La Grande Bellezza (The Great Beauty) - Foreign 5 Chilli Peppers (Hall of Fame)
• Manchester by the Sea - Drama 5 Chilli Peppers (Hall of Fame)
• Moonlight - Drama 4.5 Chilli Peppers
• Arrival - Science Fiction 4.5  Chilli Peppers
• Nocturnal Animals  -Drama 4.5  Chilli Peppers
• Hidden Figures - Drama 4  Chilli Peppers
• Moana - Kid Friendly 4  Chilli Peppers
• The Edge of Seventeen -Comedy 4 Chilli Peppers
• The Conjuring 2 - Horror 4 Chilli Peppers
• Captain Fantastic - Drama 4 Chilli Peppers
• Samson and Delilah - Gritty 4 Chilli Peppers
• The House of the Devil - Horror 3.5 Chilli Peppers
• The Mermaid - Foreign/ Fantasy 3.5 Chilli Peppers

WORST MOVIES OF 2017:

• Kong: Skull Island - Fantasy 2 Chilli Peppers
• The Great Wall - Action/ Fantasy 1.5 Chilli Peppers
• The Ghost in the Shell - Science Fiction 1.5 Chilli Peppers
• A Cure for Wellness - Horror 1.5 Chilli Peppers
• Loving - Drama 1.5 Chilli Peppers
• Valerian and the City of a 1,000 Planets - Science Fiction 1.5 Chilli Peppers
• Baywatch - Comedy 1.5 Chilli Peppers
• Yoga Hosers  -Comedy 1 Chilli Pepper
• The Bye Bye Man  - Horror 0 Chilli Peppers
• The Greasy Strangler - Art House 0 Chilli Peppers

BEST TV SERIES 2017:

• Big Little Lies - Drama 5 Chilli Peppers
• The Handmaid's Tale - Drama/ Fantasy 5 Chilli Peppers
• American Gods - Horror/ Fantasy 5 Chilli Peppers
• Atlanta - Drama 4.5 Chilli Peppers 
• Godless - Western 4.5 Chilli Peppers
• Game of Thrones S7  - Fantasy 4.5 Chilli Peppers
• Stranger Things S2 - Science Fiction 4.5 Chilli Peppers
• Twin Peaks Reboot - Art House 4 Chilli Peppers 
• Mozart in the Jungle - Drama 4 Chili Peppers 
• Alias Grace - Historical Drama 4 Chilli Peppers 
• AHS - Cult - Horror 4 Chilli Peppers
• Peaky Blinders S4 - Historical Drama 4 Chilli Peppers
• Better Things - Comedy 4 Chilli Peppers
• A-Typical - Drama 3.5 Chilli Peppers
• Girls - Final Season - Drama 3.5 Chilli Peppers
• The Sinner - Mystery/Drama 3.5 Chilli Peppers

As far as bad TV series go, well I was so busy watching really high quality TV that I managed to miss all of the shit this year, so I'm not even putting in a category for that. To be honest, I think that this year may have been one of the best of years for quality TV that I have ever known, which fills me with a lot of hope for 2018. 
Hopefully you will find something on my lists that you haven't seen yet and will now go and see on my recommendation. Also, you now know what to avoid like the plague if you should have the misfortune of coming across it.
I hope that the holiday period is being kind to you all, happy viewing!

IT
Release Date: 2017
Rating: R 18+
Running Time: 135 mins 
A supernatural horror directed by Andy Muschietti and based on the highly successful 1986 novel of the same name by Stephen King. Clearly audiences are thirsting for excellent retro horror tales because IT swiftly became the highest grossing horror film of all time and the third highest grossing R rated movie of all time. 
It's 1988 in a small American town called Derry and something insidious is lurking in the sewers; an ancient evil that feeds on the fears of children and presents itself as a clown called Pennywise. Seemingly invisible to adults, Pennywise starts to abduct the children of Derry, and turns its sights on a tight group of friends called The Losers Club. 
With all of the terrific friendship dynamics  and comradery of The Goonies, Stranger Things and Stand By Me  and all of the creepiness of a James Wan horror, IT has a formula that works on so many levels. Not only is there a creepy as all shit clown torturing the children, but all of the adults in Derry seem to be rather unpleasant as well which adds another layer of turmoil to this already emotionally affecting tale. 
IT is most definitely the best horror movie to come out of 2017. The acting is on point, with Bill Skarsgard delivering one of the most memorably disturbing horror characters of all time in Pennywise. He is however exceptionally well supported by a young and fresh faced cast who are all bringing their A game here as well, with notable performances being delivered by Finn Wolfhard, Sophia Lillis, Nicholas Hamilton and Jeremy Ray Taylor.
The visuals are certainly dark, dreadful and nightmarish; but the coming of age story that is playing in the background is not at all drowned out by the grim effects, which was really pleasing to see. IT is a true horror gem and a must see movie for fans of quality horror.
FINAL SAY: We all float down here. 
4.5 Chilli Peppers ​

One of the hardest lessons that we will ever have to learn in this life is acceptance. Everything that we do and the way that we function as people is derived from our ability (or inability) to accept that things will change and that life is ever evolving and that nothing is ever constant. Of course, part of the real beauty of life is that it is unpredictable. The fact that nothing is permanent and that things will constantly be thrown at us that will change and transform who we are is one of the best things about living, but only if we have acceptance of that truth. Without acceptance there is only resistance, fear, uprising and anxiety. 
I believe that developing a habit of acceptance is one of the fastest ways to improve yourself and your ability to deal with the pitfalls of life. Now don't get me wrong, I am not implying that you should just accept everything that comes your way, because we all know that some shit is just plain unacceptable and should never be tolerated. What I am trying to say is that you should not always feel the need to fight the good fight on every point, because sometimes it is not really 'the good fight' at all, sometimes it is just a chance for you to air your baggage and your narrow mindedness and your inability to accept change and differences.
Many teachers of spiritual enlightenment praise the ability to accept and receive change with open arms. They say that if you can master the art of accepting change as it arrives into your life than you will experience a state of true peace. And this, I believe is our biggest challenge as humans on this planet; we really need to accept but we feel like we are born to to fight. We feel compelled to resist, to pull back or even push back when our boundaries are tested, we are reluctant to change and we do not generally accept things that are new, different, unusual or of any inconvenience to us.
I do believe that acceptance can convert momentary happiness into enduring happiness when it is practised well, and I also think that there is great power in actually being happy and accepting things. I think that there is wisdom in knowing when it is the time to push back and when it is time to just let things happen without feeling the need to intervene or alter things. I think that we all need to get a little bit better at recognising those times for our own well being. As I said, I think that acceptance is the hardest skill to master in this life, but it may well be the most important one to master, and it could just be the key to unlocking our true happiness. 

Getting a little bit worn out now, just like everyone else, but still trucking on. I cannot afford to get too tired but I haven't exactly been leaving a lot of space in my life for rest at the moment. I haven't even been at home very much lately and I think that Craig is starting to feel like a widower; but there is not much that can be done about it. There really doesn't look like much respite on the horizon or anytime soon to be honest, so I'm just making my peace with busy and getting on with it all. Busy is just a side of effect of the season and when the dust all settles there will plenty of time for feet up and cocktails on the deck, so just keep calm and carry on I say. 
​I have pulled out all of my old Christmas movies and I am making my way through some of my favourites as the days to Christmas begin to countdown. I love an excuse to hit the couch for a couple of hours at this time of year, and a seasonal favourite can be just what the doctor ordered. 
I wish that I had a top ten of Christmas movie favourites to recommend, but I don't think that 10 really excellent Christmas movies actually exist, I could only think of nine that warranted three or more chili peppers:

1. The Nightmare Before Christmas (Kid Friendly)
2. A Christmas Carol (Kid Friendly)
3. It's a Wonderful Life (Fantasy)
4. Love Actually (Romance)
5. Gremlins (Fantasy)
6. The Grinch (Kid Friendly)
7. Go (Comedy)
8. The Night Before (Comedy)
9. Tangerine (Gritty)

To be fair Gremlins, Tangerine and Go are set during Christmas but aren't exactly Christmas tales, but they are totally great and worthy of a seasonal viewing; all nine of the above can be found on my genre lists if you need to see the full reviews and I have listed their genres next to them. Elf almost made the list and is a solid 2.5 Chili Peppers for me, and the rest of the Christmas movies that I have seen are, well.....meh. Generally Christmas movies are toxic, contrived crap-fests with poor and un-original storylines which is terribly annoying because people still want quality viewing at Christmas, or it that just me?
Anyway, there are lots of great vacation movies that are equally good to watch over the silly season, and one that always gets me laughing is Mr Bean's Holiday. I say ditch a shitty Christmas movies in favour of this one, what a ripper Summer holiday tale that is!

Spent my Sunday afternoon celebrating Craig's niece's expectant baby at her baby shower today. Lots of lady laughs and fun and games to be had as we sat about nibbling and chatting and rubbing the expectant tummy for the better part of the afternoon. There is nothing like an expectant baby to get ladies clucky and tongues wagging about labour experiences and the highs and lows of pregnancy. I am always surprised by the incredible clarity that women can recollect what is more than likely, one of the most challenging and/or painful experiences of their lives. 
Seriously, women can remember incredible details about the birthing process, like the exact time that their child was born, what the midwife said to them, how much their new baby weighed and how many hours they spent huffing and puffing to get them into the world. They remember which foods made them nauseous when they were pregnant and what the trip to the hospital was like, whether it was raining that day or not, how much facial hair the anaesthesiologist had and any number of other somewhat inane details surrounding the event. It is almost like those moments of time become permanently etched into a mother's memory, and every mother has their own unique tale to tell, like a battle wound or scar to bare of their heroic motherly efforts.
Personally I would rather not talk about my child birthing experiences, they weren't fun and they are not events that I look back on with fondness, in fact, they were really traumatic. However, I am more than happy to listen to the stories of others as long as it doesn't scare the shit out of the un-laboured women in the room. Some women's tales of labour woe are enough to frighten off the toughest potential mothers-to-be with their horrific recounts and I believe that some things are better left unsaid in that department.
Fortunately today, we didn't get a lot of that, just a lot of  talk about the discomforts of actually being pregnant. Craig's niece only has 6 weeks to go until ETA, and she still looks nicely compact to me. I remember looking like a sea cow when I was pregnant and feeling like a yeti, but some women just love to be pregnant.
I have no idea how women can be surrogates, being pregnant is so demanding on your body and you really do feel like an alien is going to launch itself from inside of you at any moment and you literally have no privacy when you are pregnant, your body is most definitely not your own. Why anyone would volunteer to do that to themselves for anyone else is beyond me, but I take my hat off to the ladies that can do it, I know I couldn't do it.
​I personally found pregnancy utterly over-rated, labour completely crapola and healing after the effect as much fun as finding a rogue turd in your shopping trolley, but hey, that's just me! I can't have found it too taxing, I did do it twice; and I would be lying if I said it wasn't all worth it, because a billion times over, it is all so very and completely worth it. That first look at the person that you have just made, well....it does make all of the bad stuff seem so very insignificant all at once, and that is one truth that I cannot deny. Your own newborn will most definitely take your breath away. 

There is really something special about the last term of a school year, and I don't just mean the terrifically long break that occurs at the end of term four, I mean that sense that another year has gone by, and with it, there has been a great deal of growth and development  that has been witnessed. It is that growth and development that keeps people in my industry going. It keeps the fire well lit in our belly, the hunger in our loins and gives us all that most sort after and important feeling that we so dearly long for - the feeling that we are making a difference. 
When you work in a school, term four really gives you the opportunity to reflect upon the last twelve months of your professional life. You get to see a clear record of the months that you poured all of your best intentions, your heart and your soul into the children that you worked with and you get to see all of your combined efforts come to fruition.
Yes, in term four, all of your hard spent efforts and days of endurance culminate into something very special indeed. Something quite tangible and also terrific because you get to see the change. The change for the better. It is literally what gets me up in the mornings; especially in term four when I am starting to get a bit over a lot of things as well, but that feeling of seeing a child fly by themselves without your help, it is just gold.
A child that couldn't read will be reading, a child that couldn't write will be writing, a child that couldn't count will be counting and most importantly, a child that didn't have any faith in themselves or self esteem, will be successful and will continue to succeed without your help. That is when you know that everything that you have done is worthwhile, that what you do really does matter and that all of your efforts weren't in vain; they amounted to something pretty tremendous, they helped someone to be more than what they were before. 
Term four is easily my favourite of all of the terms, because it is the term where I get to see some kids really find their feet and some even stretch their wings. So I never feel low when we return for the final stretch of the year, instead of saying - Oh lord, no not another round, I say once more with feeling, because there will be many tears of joy at graduation and many triumphs to celebrate with our students as we farewell them onto the next stage of their life journeys in a few short months time, and I can't wait to be there for it. 

Take up one idea. Make that one idea your life - think of it, dream it, live on that idea. Let the brain, muscles, nerves, every part of your body, be full of that idea, and just leave every other idea alone. This is the way to success.
-Swami Vivekananda

​Some interesting reading material with that quote at the top of the page found its way to me this week. I was immediately drawn in by those few lines and found myself reading an extensive article about a PLC vision; but at the heart of that article was a message about the power of positive thinking and envisioning clear positive outcomes, and it really got me thinking about whether or not  visualising positive outcomes can actually work.
We have all heard about (and in my case even read) 'The Secret' and we're all privy to the belief that focused and continued positive visualisation can make things happen or manifest into positive outcomes. But is there any real truth to this practise? Does it actually work, or is it just some new age malarkey to get you to waste your time? 
Elite athletes have been using the method of positive visualisation for many years as an integral part of their practise and preparation before competing, and coaches and trainers around the world swear by it's effectiveness. Turns out, that this method of mentally creating the ideal, is actually being used successfully in all walks of life. From scientists and revolutionists to housewives and hotel staff, positive visualisation techniques are being embraced and practiced everywhere, and with excellent results.
Musicians are using it to nail a difficult piece of music or to write their next album, performers are using it before they go on stage or arrive on set, writers are using it before they even put pen to paper, artists before the paint hits the canvas and therapists use it with their patients to help them to create their own successful outcomes before they happen. It would seem that if you aren't using this technique yet, then you are definitely behind the eight ball. 
Australian Psychologist Alan Richardson did a small and very significant experiment on the power of envisioning positive outcomes with a group of basketball players that had never used the technique before. He split the players into three groups and tested each player's ability to make free throws. For twenty consecutive days the first group practised throwing free throws for 20 minutes. The second group were only allowed to visualise themselves making free throws for 20 minutes a day and the third group did not do anything at all. Not surprisingly, the third group had no change at all, however, the group that only visualised that they were making the throws improved 23% which was only 1% less than the group that had physically practised doing the throws every day. This experiment proved that positive visualisation methods could definitely give a person a psychological edge on their competition, and the best news is that anyone can do it, it's super easy and it can be used by anyone for any purpose. 
According to online resources, it is best to do your visualising twice a day - first thing in the morning and right before you go to sleep, you should typically spending 10 minutes each time, amounting to 20 minutes of positive visualisation a day. There is actually a tonne of information online about the best way to do your visualisations (including youtube clips), but basically all you need to do is have your ideal goal clear before you begin and then relax, close your eyes and envision yourself in this perfect goal setting (eg. playing the piano perfectly) with as much clarity and detail as you can for ten minutes and then you're on your way.
By doing this practise, you are beginning to strengthen the pathways in your brain that will allow that thing to occur - sounds weird I know, but apparently it works. It is usually best to start with something small at first like waking up earlier or eating slower, and then once you've got some understanding of how it works and how long your brain takes to rewire itself, you can take on bigger things. 
Needless to say, I am going to give it a go. I am always keen to utilise the power of my brain and will never knock back a chance to grow for the better. I will most certainly keep you posted on my positive visions for a better future as I proceed, but I am definitely going to need to start small at first, even though I really want to visualise myself with a million bucks straight off the bat.
​Now I just have to think of something simple to get the ball rolling.....

Everyone at work is busying themselves at the moment. Years of documentation and school supplies are being unearthed from storage spaces and backroom cupboards as the senior part of the school makes a huge move to another learning area. The shifting of several classrooms, and all of that goes with it, is no small feat, and I am amazed at how swiftly and smartly this move has happened.
Thank goodness for the resilient and willing senior students and staff, who have all pitched in to make this transition run as smoothly as possible. I must say, that after only two days, the new area is shaping up to look mighty fine and completely workable. My generous team have even allocated me a terrific new 'nook' under the stairs, which may not sound that great, but it is far more spacious than the space that Harry Potter had, and a lot more private and cosy than the space that I previously had, so I am actually really pleased. The kids that I work with are super keen to get into that space and start working again, so the novelty of a new area could actually work in my favour. 
The proposed new learning areas will be amazing, and are certainly something to look forward to for next year. In the meantime, it's all in together - never mind the weather - for the next semester at least, and although this transition will ruffle a few feathers along the way, I am pretty sure that we can make it work. We have a good strong team that can rely on each other and I think that that is the magic formula that will see us all through this.
Only a couple of days until the end of another term and the halfway point of the school year. The final stretch leading up to a term break is always extremely hectic, so this is not new territory for any of us, but it is definitely a different way to end things. They say that change is as good as a holiday, and I am getting a good dose of both at the moment, so win-win.
I am really looking forward to this winter break, I have so many people to catch up with and things to get done, but I also just want a few sleep ins, some movie watching time and some curl up with a cuppa and a novel time. Zoe is celebrating her 20th birthday on Friday, (where did that 20 years go?) so that will be the kick off for these holidays. Can't wait to get the break started!

MOANA
Release Date: 2016
Rating: PG
Running Time: 113 mins
A sweeping CG animated adventure from Disney that boldly goes where no other Disney Princess movie has ever gone before by leaving out the love interest and giving the heroine total control over her own destiny. Yes, that's right, no prince character to be seen anywhere and a good dash of feminism that doesn't feel forced or heavy handed at all. 
A daring teenager named Moana is chosen by her ancestors and the sea to engage in a quest that will save the many islands of Oceania from wasting away. She must enlist the help of the mighty demigod Maui in order to fulfil her mission, but this demigod is not easy to wrangle. 
I was completely swept up in the exciting adventure and pace of this movie. The animation is incredible, the voice actors are perfectly cast, the soundtrack is fantastic and the character of Moana couldn't be more adorable. Disney have hit a bullseye here, Moana is right on the mark and very forward thinking. I far preferred this to Frozen, which I found intensely over-rated, and I was so relieved to see that the Disney Princess genre had fully redeemed itself in such a pleasant way. 
FINAL SAY: If you wear a dress and you have an animal sidekick, you're a princess.
4 Chilli Peppers ​

For three days from sunset on June 20th the Mid-Winter Solstice occurs. It is sometimes also called Yule or Alban Arthuan, and it's origins pre-date all organised religions. When early humans first saw the sun at its lowest point and all of the earth's vegetation was dead or dying, they feared that the light of the sun and life would not return to them. A tradition of lighting great bonfires began; lit torches would decorate evergreen trees that had been dragged into caves and homes (that's how the humble Christmas tree got its beginnings) and loved ones would gather in closely to shelter from the cold and gaze upon the light from those torches to remind themselves that light would return again one day soon and the earth would be green again.
These days it is clearly nothing nearly as dramatic as that, because science has taught us that the Mid-winter Solstice simply symbolizes the least amount of daylight hours, or the darkest days of the year. The sun never really gets very high in the sky at this time of the year, so the dawn occurs much later and the sunsets much earlier, making things seem very dreary indeed. On the upside, once we are past the darkest days we have much to look forward to. Days will now begin to get longer, the earth will start to awaken from it's Autumn and Winter slumbering and slowly, day by day we will move towards the warmer and brighter moments of Spring.
Every year Helen and I get together to celebrate this turning of the season, it has become somewhat of a tradition for us. This year we made a variety of homemade soups and a butterscotch pudding to enjoy by the light of many candles with a few generous libations of good wine. There is nothing like the comfort of home, a good friend, a loving family, some homemade comfort food, tasty wine and a cosy environment to push back the darkness and to keep you heading forward towards brighter days. For that I am truly blessed, because without these comforts in my life right now, this Mid-Winter Solstice would have swallowed me whole. 

SPIRITED AWAY 
Release Date: 2001
Rating: PG
Running Time: 125 mins
Hayao Miyazaki brings to life all of magic and intrigue of another world in this visually pleasing animation movie. If you are looking for PIXAR then don't look here, this is a delicate body of work with a whimsical soundtrack that enhances the refined animation style.
The film follows the adventures of 10 year old Chihiro as she delves into a fantasy world full of spirits, she's on a quest to save her parents who have been turned into pigs by the evil witch Yubaba. She encounters many weird and wonderful characters through her employment at the spirit bath house and must call on her inner courage and bravery, to overcome the many challenges that stand between her reunification with her parents. 
It is an intelligent piece of children's cinema and perplexing even to some adults,  a worthy watch. 
FINAL SAY: You'll be spirited away.
4.5 Chilli Peppers ​

It would be fair to say that I watch a shit load of movies. I don't always watch new movies though, so I don't get to the cinema as much as one would imagine. However, last year I still managed to watch about 220 movies over the course of the year, which is a pretty good effort I think, especially since I also watched about 30 TV series as well. 
In my pursuit of quality viewing, I naturally encounter some pretty dodgy shit as well, and I had more than my fair share of disappointments both at the cinema and on the couch over the past year.
​I felt that it was only fair to share my highlights and lowlights of 2016 with you, so that I may steer you in the right direction for any future viewings.
Please note that these are in no particular order.
The Best Movies of 2016:
The Hunt for The Wilderpeople
La La Land
Kubo and The Two Strings
Deadpool
The Jungle Book
The Lobster
Fantastic Beasts and Where to Find Them
Finding Dory
Swiss Army Man
The Witch
The Little Prince
10 Cloverfield Lane
Midnight Special
Zootopia
The worst films I saw in 2016 (not all 2016 releases):
Assassin's Creed
Alice Through the Looking Glass
Zoolander 2
Absolutely Fabulous: The Movie
Nice Guys
Central Intelligence
Suicide Squad
Chappie
Anomalisa
The Dressmaker
The best movies I watched in 2016 that were not actually released in 2016 (aka. catch-up movies) :
Youth
There Will Be Blood
American Hustle
The Revenant
Sightseers
Adaptation
Raging Bull
Scarface
Apocalypse Now
Tangerine
Hateful 8
The Room
Me and Earl and The Dying Girl
Straight Outta Compton
Wages of Fear
The Skin I Live In
The Best TV Series of 2016: 
Stranger Things
Broad City
Game of Thrones
A Series of Unfortunate Events
Dirk Gently's Holistic Detective Agency
Preacher
Twin Peaks
Haters Back Off!
Upper Middle Bogan
Love
Peaky Blinders
The Night Of
Better Call Saul
Raised by Wolves
Black Mirror
TV Series that I Tried to Endure 2016 but just couldn't:
Westworld
iZombie
Wayward Pines
​Scream Queens

So there you have it, the best and the worst of 2016 for me. Hopefully, you will be inspired to watch something on my good list, and even though the bad list stuff was shithouse to me, I know that many people will totally disagree with my choices.
In truth, I believe that all movies deserve to be seen, even the bad ones, because someone put their heart and soul into making them, so who am I say that they aren't worthy? At the end of the day, regardless of whether it's good, bad or ugly, it's all entertainment and that is never a bad thing in my mind. So with that, I will leave you with what I consider to be the most shamefully overlooked movie of 2016, a gem of a film and one that the whole family can enjoy. 

Kicked off the New Year quietly out in Enfield with a couple of friends, Zoe and Lachlainn and the two men in my life, Craig and Seth. No fanfare or hoo-har, just some good company, great music,  tasty eats and yummy beverages, what more can one ask for really?
​As the magical turning over of time from one year to another arrives, everyone goes bonkers creating resolutions that they probably won't live up to and promises to themselves that they more than likely will not keep. However, let me just put all of my skepticism and pessimism aside for now and firstly wish a very happy new year to everyone out there. I really do hope that you will be among the committed that actually does fulfill their resolutions and meet their personal goals. 
I used to be so gung-ho for goal setting every new year, often setting myself exhausting goals that I became completley OCD kooky about completing. And then one day I realised that I had mounted the crazy pony to nutter town with all of my intense goal setting bullshit, and that I was literally making myself miserable trying to get things done. So last new year, for the first time in many years, I just totally droppped it.
I didn't set myself any big goals, no resolutions.....nothing. That in itself was a massive achievement for me, because for many years I took a lot of pride in my ability to take on new things every year (even if it killed me). I have to say that dropping my self expectations may have been the best thing that I have ever done for myself. Without any pre-set goals for the year, I actually managed to get a shit load of 'self' work done, in my own time and as I wanted to. I transitioned into a space where I was actually living in the moment, taking on things as they presented themselves to me and going along at a pace that felt right at the time. Absolutely zen-ful stuff I tell you!
Without any mental prompting or agenda, I quit smoking this year. I haven't had a puff since May 2016, it's the longest non-pregnant non-smoking period of my life since I was 15 years old! I also took up yoga, which has been mentally and physically tranforming for me. I now practise daily and it has really helped to reduce my stress levels and to help me to accept the things that I cannot change.
There is really something to be said for being in the moment and letting go a little. My need to be in control has stifled an awful lot for me in the past, and even though it has taken me over forty years to realise that, I have finally arrived at a good place. 
So, no resolutions or goals for me in 2017. Instead I have made a simple self promise to immerse myself completely in every moment, and to seek my own bliss in those moments.
​Another year = 365 opportunites, and I don't want to miss any of them. 

Made it! 
Yes, I have happily ran the gauntlet that was Christmas 2016. I sang Christmas carols, went to see the twinkly Christmas lights around town, baked gingerbread and shortbread, ate many a roasted beast, opened extravagent gifts and had more than my fair share of champagne and Irish whiskey tipples. I have come out the other end of all of this with the realisation that we place far too much time, money and energy into one day of celebration (well more like three for me) but that's besides the point. What I am trying to say is that I saw a lot of stressed out faces, a lot of annoyed individuals and a lot of eye rolling this season and it made me feel a bit sad to be honest. 
Don't get me wrong, I totally got my merry on and mostly I was having a pretty terrific time; but I did see a lot of other people not having as much of a good time and clearly not feeling the Chistmas spirit very much at all. A lot of people that I encountered seemed to be generally enduring the gathering together process, rather than actually enjoying themselves, and well....that was a bit concerning to me. If you aren't having any fun at your Christmas get togethers, then you are doing it all wrong! 
If everyone is 'enduring' then the recipe is not correct. People should be all 'knees up mother Brown' at Christmas time, and most importantly they need to be really nice to each other because it is supposed to be the merriest holiday of the year. It is most certainly NOT the time to flick your bitch switch and get all fucking hostile and moody. It is absolutely imperative that you keep your personal issues on the back burner at Christmas, otherwise everyone walks away feeling like a piece of shit, swearing that they will never get together again and the whole point of even gathering together in the first place becomes utterly pointless. 
What you should be doing at Christmas gatherings is eating like a king and not worrying about your caloric intake. You should also have a least one good stiff drink (a lot more if you can get away with it) and give everyone at least one really good meaningful hug over the course of the day. You should get at least one awesome thing that you love the shit out of, anything on top of that is gravy. And you really must take some time out to reflect on how fricken lucky you are to have so many opportunities and luxuries and people to spend your time with. If you do all that, then your Christmas gatherings will always be fabulous, lose sight of that stuff, get caught up in the minor details or have a nasty turn and you will have gone all wrong with it. 
I must say, that in spite of some rather odd behaviours that I witnessed, I had a really tremendously good Christmas. I was so spoilt it was ridiculous! I ate some bloody delicious things, and I was generally being mighty merry in every way possible. It was a much better Christmas for me this year than the last one was, and I am now looking forward to a spectacular New Year as well.
I am loving the silly season this year!

THE JUNGLE BOOK
Release Date: 2016
Rating: PG
Running Time: 106 mins 
Here is a version of Rudyard Kipling's classic tale about the adventures of Mowgli the Man-cub that even he would've loved. This visually stunning, live action CGI was directed by Jon Favreau and produced by Walt Disney Pictures, who also produced the 1967 animated film of the same name, which is quite frankly left in the dust in the wake of this beautifully realized and captivating version. 
An orphaned human child named Mowgli has been raised in the wild by a wolf pack and a panther mentor. When he attracts the unwanted attentions of the ferocious tiger Shere Khan, he is sent away by his animal guardians to the safety of the nearest man village, but Mowgli does not want to leave the jungle or his animal family. 
Simply put, the animals are just 'out of this world' amazing in this film, I have not seen anything that comes close to this yet in terms of computer generated wildlife. I was completely spellbound, and spent half of the movie kicking myself that I hadn't gone to see it on the big screen. The animals have been perfectly voiced by Ben Kingsley, Idris Elba, Scarlett Johansson and Christopher Walken, but my favourite by a long mile was Bill Murray's marvelous portrayal of Baloo, the chilled out, honey craving bear that befriends Mowgli. 
This is high quality, engrossing, intelligent family entertainment, that should not be missed. 
FINAL SAY: For the strength of the pack is the wolf, and the strength of the wolf is the pack. 
4.5 Chili Peppers ​

God I love the school holidays!
It is so nice to be able to catch up on all of the things that I have put off for the better part of a term. Just having the chance to spend a bit of time laying in bed, reading a book and sipping coffee in the mornings, lingering over long lunches and indulging in all of my personal vices...ahhhh... it is truly heaven on a stick. 
I really don't envy people that only get four weeks of leave a year, it is bloody criminal. Four weeks a year is really not enough leave to sate anyone's need for a break. Only 20 work free days out of 250 odd possible work days per year is ridiculous. Who came up with the five day working week anyway? It is clearly not a very balanced set up is it? Four on and three off seems a bit more fitting, and if you are going to put in five days a week, then you should get a couple of weeks every quarter to recharge the batteries and indulge in doing fun stuff. Besides it is also the time when everyone's kids are on holidays, and it seems so unfair to make parents miss out on valuable holiday/bonding time with their kids. We need to have another look at this crappy annual leave system, I would guarantee that people would be a shit load happier if they got a break every quarter, and probably a lot more productive too. 
My holiday breaks are like holy days to me. I use them to the very best of my ability to not only take some rest and recovery time, but to also reconnect with family and friends and to get some purely self orientated things done. I am a huge advocate for doing things that serve no real purpose but to make you feel good; self time is vital to a happy and fulfilling life.
Since holidays started five days ago, I have started a new painting and a new novel, almost completed knitting a scarf that I started about a year ago and binge watch a couple of TV series. I have managed to frame the art pieces that I brought back from Singapore, and I finally got all of my photos developed from the trip too, just need to put them into an album now. I've had a delicious lunch with a friend, gone shopping, cleaned the house from top to bottom, stripped and cleaned out the spare room wardrobe and of course, gone to the movies. Not what I would I call a waste of time, and God I am thankful for the time to do it! 
Been a while since I saw anything at the movies that I deemed good enough to put onto my Hall of Fame list, especially a children's film, but it has happened. If you are taking any kids to see a movie these holidays, I cannot recommend this film enough, it is amazing. Go see it on the big screen while you can. 

The bi-annual school concert last night went really well. Apart from a few minor hiccups, which one can only expect when we're talking about wrangling 300 odd tired primary school kids through two major performances that didn't end until 10pm. All things told, it was actually really good. Even the staff all pulled together, costumed up and managed to produce a reasonably decent dance routine to the original theme song from Ghostbusters, complete with a silly string squirting slimer character that managed to delight and also freak out some kids. And just like that, it is over and done with for another 2 years, and I can't say that I am not glad to have it all done and dusted. 
Knocked things back a bit today, kids (and staff) were all really tired so the expectation to be super productive was on the low down, which I was grateful for. Rocked up in my comfy clothes knowing that it was not going to be my most professional work day ever, and nestled in for the morning with the kids that did make it to school to watch Fantastic Mr Fox. Those of you that have visited my 'Hall of Fame' list would know that it is the only children's movie to have made that list, and it is a movie that is sincerely near and dear to my heart. Directed by one of my all time favourite directors Wes Anderson, and written by one of my favourite children's authors Roald Dahl, how can it not be a winner? 
Anyway, this term I read the Fantastic Mr Fox novel with a number of children in reading groups, and had promised them a viewing of the film. Today seemed like the best day to indulge in that promise since it is the end of the term and everyone was knackered after last night's stint, but I didn't even realise that it was also the 100 year anniversary of Roald Dahl's birthday yesterday. This made it seem like it was not only amazingly appropriate to view the film today in homage to his book, but downright necessary!  And so it was, I sat at work this morning sipping coffee and sharing one of my favourite children's movies of all time with a bunch of Grade 5/6 kids. A bloody nice way to spend a Wednesday morning if I do say so myself.
​So cheers to you Mr Dahl, thanks for being such an awesome writer and leaving behind such an amazing body of work that is still enchanting children and adults like me, one hundred years on. 

Everyone remembers the weird kid that went to their school. It might have been the kid that always had snot hanging out of their nose, or the strange teeth/ dorky haircut kid, or the kid who always looked dirty or had head lice all the time or something, but there was just something about this one kid that you remember. It was never a good thing that made the weird kid memorable either, they had something about them that you definitely didn't want to have yourself. 
Their were a couple of stand out weird kids for me growing up. One in particular in primary school that I can recall was a really smelly girl called Monica. She had a truly weird scent about her; I may be able to identify that smell as an adult and probably not think of it as that weird, but back then, my young and stupid brain thought that Monica really stank. You see, I don't remember what she stank of exactly, I just remember that everyone knew that she stank. I don't think that I ever picked on her about it or anything, but I do recall that she was generally a bit of an outcast, some kids did give her a tough time and looking back on it, we all treated her pretty badly just because she smelt weird.
Generally speaking, kids are bloody ruthless mutha fuckers when it comes to ostracizing other kids. Any sign of weirdness and boom, you're on the outer and labeled the weird kid for all of eternity. Even years later, when the weird kid works that 'weird shit' out that made them weird and sorts it out, they still never really bounce back to full status again. Let's be honest, we know that this is true because we can still clearly recall the weird kid from our childhood, we never forget those labels, that horrid shit sticks.
I recall being deathly afraid of being singled out, especially when I was in primary school. Being accepted by your peers was a right of passage, and I wanted in. I often chose to align myself with kids that were way cooler and more popular than myself in an attempt to be part of the crowd, unfortunately a lot of them were also assholes. ​It wasn't until I got to my upper years at secondary school that I worked out what an ostracizing load of shit it was all was and how little I actually gave a fuck about what my peers thought of me. But the years leading up to that realisation were hardly glittering, and when I think of the petty shit that I accepted as good reasons to ostracize someone, I feel pretty horrible. 
Poor Monica, I wonder if she ever recovered from being called stinky all those years ago. I know that some of the cruel crap that was said to me as a kid has certainly had an affect on the type of adult I have become, I can't imagine that being the weird kid would be easy to forget. Sometimes I do wonder about the weird kids, and how they all turned out. I like to think that they all got successful and super happy and are going to bed content every night, secretly flipping us all the bird as they climb into their four poster beds with their super hot partners.
All that I know for sure is that I am genuinely sorry to anyone that I may have upset or offended over my formative years, a time when my brain was under construction and I was probably a total dickface. And sorry to Monica, wherever you are now, for going along with the smelly thing in primary school and allowing the other kids to make you feel like shit, that was not cool of me at all. I hope that you can forgive me as you climb out of your bubble-bath spa, smelling like a rose and banging your Fassbender look alike husband every night under your Egyptian cotton sheets, I so hope you can.