It is important to have some routine in your life. A repeated pattern and commitment to following a routine can actually be really healthy and exceptionally beneficial. Routine allows time for the cultivation of ritual into your life and is the best way to ensure continual growth with whatever it is that you are putting your energies into. If you want to make positive changes in your life, you really do need to enlist a bit of self discipline and have the ability to follow a certain amount of routine.
I have managed to make some significant changes to my life over the past couple years and it has only been possible through routine and ritual. I actually prefer to use the word ritual over routine. Routine sounds so damn boring, laborious and repetitious, whereas ritual sounds like something profoundly soulful and spiritually aware. Whenever I attempt to take on something new, try to rid myself of an old habit or I'm just try to find more meaning in the mundane, I always like to look at the work ahead as the cultivating of a new ritual into my life. An undertaking that will essentially improve me and make me stronger, better, faster and wiser in mind, body and spirit. 
It is through this holistic way of thinking that I have been able to create several daily rituals that have allowed me to master many things that I never thought that I would be able to do; things that I probably would have laughed about if someone had told be that I would be doing them a few years ago. Quitting smoking, getting up earlier everyday, taking a daily yoga class, meditating, incorporating mindfulness and visualisation techniques into my daily life; all of these things I have managed to cultivate into my daily life through repetition and ritual. 
When you think about it, there is the beauty of ritual in almost everything that we do if we can manage to do it mindfully and with that word 'ritual' at the forefront of our thinking. Eating, cleaning, showering, driving, speaking, working, walking, listening, standing still, brewing tea or even sleeping. The list is absolutely endless, we do most of these things thoughtlessly and on autopilot, but we can get so much more out of what we consider mundane if we just start to see it all as some sacred dance, some magical ritual of the self that we get to celebrate every single day of our lives. 
Take some time to try it for yourself. Create a new ritual where you allow yourself to be lost in the rhythm of your own life. Get up a little earlier, try something new, enjoy the mundane by looking at it all with fresh eyes, it is easy to cultivate and celebrate the ritual of your own life everyday if you allow yourself to. 
The American philosopher and motivational speaker Wayne Dyer once said If you change the way you look at things, the things you look at change, and he is not just some holistic nutter, he is 100% correct. Let every moment matter, let everyday be steeped in something marvellous and let yourself enjoy ritual over routine and before you know it, you'll have a lot more to love about your life as well. 

Anyone that says that G rated movies are just for kids is an absolute frickin' idiot! Especially given the exceptionally high quality of children's movies that have been released over the last five years in particular. The standard and quality of children's cinema has really come a very long way from when I was a kid, and thank God for that because some of the bullshit media propaganda that we were subliminally subjected to as children was downright ridiculous and would never be tolerated by today's standards. 
There were depictions of sexual harassment, racism, homophobia, discrimination and violence in seemingly innocent cartoons from Warner Bros. Looney Tunes and Merrie Melodies that I can recall seeing as a child. Some television programs that I watched regularly as a child like Sesame Street, The Smurfs, Scooby Doo, Captain Planet and even The Muppets have all now been cited as having inappropriate or biased undertones which are thankfully no longer permissible in children's television. 
When you are a kid, you really aren't aware of the subtle undertones or subliminal messaging that you are being fed through seemingly innocent mediums, but as you get older and reflect back, you realise just how much of it that you were actually seeing and taking in on a daily basis and it is quite a disturbing realisation. 
​I know that when I was a girl, all of the Disney princesses were always saved by some kind of Prince Charming character and they all had incredible hair, svelte figures and immaculate grooming. Not one of them was ever capable of avoiding what appeared to be pretty obvious danger in my mind and none of them had the minerals to ever save themselves without male intervention. Generally, all the young female characters were damsels in distress and the older female characters were portrayed as evil witches, cruel stepmothers or rotund and ditzy nanna/ fairy godmother types. The heroes of the stories were always muscular male role models and after they swept in and rescued said 'damsels in distress'  they would promptly marry them and then it was expected that life would go forth happily ever after - END OF STORY.
People often argue that the Disney Princesses Belle and Mulan broke those stereotypical molds for Disney, but I wonder, did they really? I mean lets be honest, Belle had a raging case of Stockholm Syndrome and Mulan had to dress up like a man to be taken seriously, that is not exactly ideal now is it? Sure they were making improvements, but it was not until more recent years that a shift in gender stereotyping really came about.
Disney and Pixar alike have truly cleaned up their act and shifted their 'Princess' focus to more of a 'family bond' focus in recent years and it has been a very welcomed change. Now instead of the worn out and archaic 'Damsel in Distress' trope, we see more self empowered female lead roles in children's cinema. The hero is now often the heroine and the focus on self esteem, self awareness, family values and environmental issues has become far more prevalent. 
It is has now, more than ever before, become completely unfair to say that G rated movies are just for kids, because the standards of storyline, animation and character development in G rated movies is now higher than it has ever been in the past. Children's films really do deserve to get more attention and producers should be praised for their diligence in attempting to teach children about the more important and relevant issues of our current condition rather than just ensuring that the hottie gets to the ball on time to dance with the prince. 

COCO
Release Date: 2017
Rating: G
Running Time: 109 mins 
It seems that the Pixar/ Disney combo cannot put a foot wrong lately and Coco is another fine example of their terrific storytelling abilities and perfectly honed animation skills. Wisely released in Mexico the weekend before Dia de Los Muertos, Coco swiftly became the highest grossing film in Mexico and since then it has continued to receive worldwide praise and award accolades. 
12 year old Miguel's family owns a shoemaking business that has been passed down through the generations. Ever since grandma Coco's father abandoned her and her mother to pursue a musical career, the family have had a strict no music policy and an expectation that all generations will make shoes. However, secretly budding musician Miguel is desperate to enter the local Day of the Dead talent show and is willing to go against his family's wishes to do so, even is it means stealing a guitar from his musical hero Ernesto's mausoleum. By stealing from the dead, Miguel discovers that he has placed a curse upon himself which must be broken by sunrise to be undone. 
This is a heart warming family tale about remembering those that we have lost and treasuring our memories of them. I am a huge sucker for all things Mexican, especially anything to with Dias de Los Muertos, so I just adored this movie and thought that it was a moving and passionate tribute to Mexican culture and their incredible family bonds, both here and in the afterlife. 
FINAL SAY: Never forget how much your family cares for you. 
4 Chilli Peppers ​

There is a line in the song Everybody's Free (to Wear Sunscreen) that says - Do NOT read beauty magazines, they will only make you feel ugly. I have been thinking a lot about that line lately, not because I read beauty magazines because I most certainly do not, but I have really been paying a lot of attention lately to the incredible job that advertising campaigns, the media and the money making 'fat cat' corporations of the world do when it comes to making us regular people feel like we are not enough.
The constant barrage of subliminal and non-subliminal messaging that we are bombarded with on a daily basis is just astronomical, and they all seem to be aimed at making us all believe that we are not conforming, not cutting it or that we are just not very good looking. And, it is not surprising to know, that these constant attempts to make us feel lousy about ourselves have been extremely effective, because not only are we (the consumers) buying more beauty, fitness and diet products than ever before, we also have far lower levels of self confidence about the way that we look and the way that we generally feel about ourselves as well. 
Once you step onto the treadmill of media-fed fear and self loathing, it is a never ending cycle of ugliness. You will catch yourself saying horrible things to yourself like: I am too fat, I need to change, why don't I look like the women in the magazines?....blah ....blah ....blah....and boom, they have won, they have got inside of your head and they have won. They have got you self doubting and not really liking yourself very much anymore, and once that begins, so do the attempts at 'fixing' yourself, and that is damn good for business but not so good for you. 
The path of self improvement is paved with good intentions but so very often it just lines the pockets of very bad people. There is more than one reason that models in beauty magazines are so thin, and it doesn't have a lot to do with looking good, because a lot of them don't really look that good at all in real life, it has everything to do with creating an unattainable and unrealistic ideal that will force us consumers to keep on spending and pushing in some mad pursuit of an unattainable goal. We actually buy in to the idea that some photoshopped, emaciated, plastic surgery victim looks amazing, because we have been programmed to think that fake bodies look great. We sucker ourselves into thinking that being wafer thin, fat lipped, big titted or getting a washboard stomach will complete us and make us more satisfied, and so we spend money willingly to do it. Beauty has become so sad and so removed from reality; and every day more and more people buy into it's glossy and fraudulent ideal. 
And when people can't attain these unrealistic goals, what do they do? Well, they just keep on spending! They spend on binge food, or comfort food or a therapist to try and rebuild their smashed self esteem, but the bottom line is that they spend. And that is all that any of this is about really, money. Beauty magazines, advertisements, campaigns, the media in general, they are all constantly pushing you to reach for your wallet or purse so that you can be more, be better, have more and look amazing. You never see any of them saying, you are perfect just as you are or you don't need to change a thing or you don't need to be any more than you already are; uh of course you don't, that shit doesn't sell! 
I guess what I am trying to say is that yes, beauty magazines will only make you feel ugly, but so will a lot of other things and some people as well, and you have to stand tall against it. Don't let the fat cats win, be true to yourself, love who you are and never believe that anyone in a beauty magazine really looks that amazing in real life; well not every day anyway.
Ignore the haters, enjoy your body, eat well and don't feel like you need to buy anything to be better than you already are. No product can ever replace your own peace of mind or your sense of self worth and you should never sacrifice believing that you are perfect just as you are for any fad, fetish or fanatical behaviour that the media can try and entice you with.
Just be you and be perfectly free, that's about as beautiful as anything can ever get in my mind. 

Seth turned thirteen yesterday. I now have a teenage son, which makes me feel quite old in some ways, but also very proud, because I absolutely adore my son and couldn't be any happier about the young man that he is becoming. 
As usual, Seth celebrated his birthday in the most low key manner that he could think of. One friend to sleepover, a spread of various tacos, a homemade ice-cream cake and plenty of gaming time. Seriously, teenage boys are the most easily pleased creatures on the planet from what I can gather; no fuss, no frills and as a little social interaction as possible and they are completely happy and content. Seth literally wanted nothing for his birthday, he wasn't even a little bit phased about the day at all. You should've heard the awkward conversations leading up to the event, they mostly went something like this: 
Your birthday is coming up buddy, pretty exciting, you're gonna be 13!
Yeah 
Have you thought about how you might like to celebrate it?
Nope.
Would you like to go out for the day?
No I don't think so.
Would you like to go to the pool or the beach?
No.
Would you like a party?
HELL NO!
What would you like me to do for your birthday then?
Nothing really......uhhh....maybe you could make tacos? 
Tacos? Is that what you want to eat for your birthday? You know that you can have anything you want right? 
Yeah, I want tacos.
Okay, anything else? 
No
Cake?
If you want to.
It's your birthday, you will be wanting cake won't you?
I spos.
What sort?
Whatever you like
Whatever you like I think!
Okay, ice cream cake maybe?
Sure, anything else? 
Nope.
Do you want me to invite anyone over or anything?
Maybe, I'll get back to you on that one. 
Okay, well if you think of anything else let me know.
OK.

And that was it, there was no getting back to me, no mention of his birthday again until a couple of days before when I had another go at grilling him. 
So any thoughts on your birthday yet?
Nah
So you aren't going to do anything to celebrate it?
I thought Conor could come over.
Of course
He said he could.
You already asked him?
Yeah.
And?
He said yeah.
So he will come out or will I be picking him up?
He will just come out sometime, his dad will drop him out. He's gonna call you. 
Oh, so it's all sorted?
Yeah.
And that's all you want to do?
Yep. Don't stress mum, it's all good, it's just another birthday.

And that is how it always plays out with Seth, minimal conversation, minimal hassle and as little fuss as possible. I can't say that it is all that weird, I mean he has Craig and I for parents so what can we expect really? Both of our kids are pretty introverted, but Seth is a serious home body that even I cannot compete with. And in spite of his lack of adventure or thirst for stimulation, he had a terrific time on his birthday and said thanks for an awesome day when it was all over. Like I said, teenage boys, they're the easiest species on the planet to please and that can only be seen as a good thing. 

THE BOY AND THE BEAST
Release Date: 2016
Rating: PG
Running Time: 119 mins
A Japanese animated adventure film, written and directed by award winning director Mamoru Hosoda, that won Animation of the Year at the 37th Japan Academy Prizes. The Boy and the Beast also captivated audiences around the world with its unique animation style and creative storytelling. 
A troubled boy stumbles upon an alternate world that is filled with fantastic beasts. A powerful and gruff beast warrior named Kumatetsu, who has been searching for an apprentice, takes the boy on and attempts to train him in the ways of the warrior. 
This is a thoughtfully put together coming of age tale that has plenty of interesting and colourful characters, and enough complications to keep interest levels high. The animation styling here is so good, I loved the overall tone and effect of this film, it was such a pleasing visual undertaking. The Boy and the Beast  was certainly one of the hidden gems of 2016 and is definitely a family movie worthy of your time.  
FINAL SAY: Am I human, or am I a beast?
4 Chilli Peppers ​

It's that time again, the time for me to unleash my viewing loves and loathes for the year of 2017. In total, I watched 279 movies and 62 TV series in 2017, so yeah, it is fair to say that I have a robust addiction to entertainment and that I have a fairly good idea of what is out there.
My biggest undertaking for the year was a rewatch of the entire Lost Series, 121 episodes in total, and although it took me the better part of the entire year to get through, it was worth the effort. Next to the Twin Peaks Reboot, Lost was the next biggest mind fuck of the year for me.
I must say that the bar raises every single year for me because movies and TV are constantly improving in quality and there is a never ending stream of excellent viewing to be had. That makes it a lot harder for me to discern the best,  but also a lot more enjoyable in the long run.
However, without further ado, here are my picks for the best and worst of 2017, my full reviews of these movies can be found on their corresponding genre lists. 
BEST MOVIES OF 2017:

• IT  - Horror  4.5 Chilli Peppers
• A Ghost Story - Art House 4.5 Chilli Peppers
• Mother! - Challenging 4.5 Chilli Peppers
• Blade Runner 2049 - Science Fiction 4.5 Chilli Peppers
• Baby Driver - Action 4 Chilli Peppers
• Dunkirk - War 4 Chilli Peppers
• Guardians of the Galaxy Vol 2 - Fantasy 4 Chilli Peppers
• Logan - Super 4 Chilli Peppers
• Get Out - Horror 3.5 Chilli Peppers
• A Dark Song - Horror 3.5 Chilli Peppers
• T2 - Trainspotting - Drama 3.5 Chilli Peppers
• Logan Lucky - Action/Comedy 3.5 Chilli Peppers

BEST CATCH UP MOVIES OF 2017: (Movies released before 2017 that I finally saw in 2017)

• La Grande Bellezza (The Great Beauty) - Foreign 5 Chilli Peppers (Hall of Fame)
• Manchester by the Sea - Drama 5 Chilli Peppers (Hall of Fame)
• Moonlight - Drama 4.5 Chilli Peppers
• Arrival - Science Fiction 4.5  Chilli Peppers
• Nocturnal Animals  -Drama 4.5  Chilli Peppers
• Hidden Figures - Drama 4  Chilli Peppers
• Moana - Kid Friendly 4  Chilli Peppers
• The Edge of Seventeen -Comedy 4 Chilli Peppers
• The Conjuring 2 - Horror 4 Chilli Peppers
• Captain Fantastic - Drama 4 Chilli Peppers
• Samson and Delilah - Gritty 4 Chilli Peppers
• The House of the Devil - Horror 3.5 Chilli Peppers
• The Mermaid - Foreign/ Fantasy 3.5 Chilli Peppers

WORST MOVIES OF 2017:

• Kong: Skull Island - Fantasy 2 Chilli Peppers
• The Great Wall - Action/ Fantasy 1.5 Chilli Peppers
• The Ghost in the Shell - Science Fiction 1.5 Chilli Peppers
• A Cure for Wellness - Horror 1.5 Chilli Peppers
• Loving - Drama 1.5 Chilli Peppers
• Valerian and the City of a 1,000 Planets - Science Fiction 1.5 Chilli Peppers
• Baywatch - Comedy 1.5 Chilli Peppers
• Yoga Hosers  -Comedy 1 Chilli Pepper
• The Bye Bye Man  - Horror 0 Chilli Peppers
• The Greasy Strangler - Art House 0 Chilli Peppers

BEST TV SERIES 2017:

• Big Little Lies - Drama 5 Chilli Peppers
• The Handmaid's Tale - Drama/ Fantasy 5 Chilli Peppers
• American Gods - Horror/ Fantasy 5 Chilli Peppers
• Atlanta - Drama 4.5 Chilli Peppers 
• Godless - Western 4.5 Chilli Peppers
• Game of Thrones S7  - Fantasy 4.5 Chilli Peppers
• Stranger Things S2 - Science Fiction 4.5 Chilli Peppers
• Twin Peaks Reboot - Art House 4 Chilli Peppers 
• Mozart in the Jungle - Drama 4 Chili Peppers 
• Alias Grace - Historical Drama 4 Chilli Peppers 
• AHS - Cult - Horror 4 Chilli Peppers
• Peaky Blinders S4 - Historical Drama 4 Chilli Peppers
• Better Things - Comedy 4 Chilli Peppers
• A-Typical - Drama 3.5 Chilli Peppers
• Girls - Final Season - Drama 3.5 Chilli Peppers
• The Sinner - Mystery/Drama 3.5 Chilli Peppers

As far as bad TV series go, well I was so busy watching really high quality TV that I managed to miss all of the shit this year, so I'm not even putting in a category for that. To be honest, I think that this year may have been one of the best of years for quality TV that I have ever known, which fills me with a lot of hope for 2018. 
Hopefully you will find something on my lists that you haven't seen yet and will now go and see on my recommendation. Also, you now know what to avoid like the plague if you should have the misfortune of coming across it.
I hope that the holiday period is being kind to you all, happy viewing!

IT
Release Date: 2017
Rating: R 18+
Running Time: 135 mins 
A supernatural horror directed by Andy Muschietti and based on the highly successful 1986 novel of the same name by Stephen King. Clearly audiences are thirsting for excellent retro horror tales because IT swiftly became the highest grossing horror film of all time and the third highest grossing R rated movie of all time. 
It's 1988 in a small American town called Derry and something insidious is lurking in the sewers; an ancient evil that feeds on the fears of children and presents itself as a clown called Pennywise. Seemingly invisible to adults, Pennywise starts to abduct the children of Derry, and turns its sights on a tight group of friends called The Losers Club. 
With all of the terrific friendship dynamics  and comradery of The Goonies, Stranger Things and Stand By Me  and all of the creepiness of a James Wan horror, IT has a formula that works on so many levels. Not only is there a creepy as all shit clown torturing the children, but all of the adults in Derry seem to be rather unpleasant as well which adds another layer of turmoil to this already emotionally affecting tale. 
IT is most definitely the best horror movie to come out of 2017. The acting is on point, with Bill Skarsgard delivering one of the most memorably disturbing horror characters of all time in Pennywise. He is however exceptionally well supported by a young and fresh faced cast who are all bringing their A game here as well, with notable performances being delivered by Finn Wolfhard, Sophia Lillis, Nicholas Hamilton and Jeremy Ray Taylor.
The visuals are certainly dark, dreadful and nightmarish; but the coming of age story that is playing in the background is not at all drowned out by the grim effects, which was really pleasing to see. IT is a true horror gem and a must see movie for fans of quality horror.
FINAL SAY: We all float down here. 
4.5 Chilli Peppers ​

One of the hardest lessons that we will ever have to learn in this life is acceptance. Everything that we do and the way that we function as people is derived from our ability (or inability) to accept that things will change and that life is ever evolving and that nothing is ever constant. Of course, part of the real beauty of life is that it is unpredictable. The fact that nothing is permanent and that things will constantly be thrown at us that will change and transform who we are is one of the best things about living, but only if we have acceptance of that truth. Without acceptance there is only resistance, fear, uprising and anxiety. 
I believe that developing a habit of acceptance is one of the fastest ways to improve yourself and your ability to deal with the pitfalls of life. Now don't get me wrong, I am not implying that you should just accept everything that comes your way, because we all know that some shit is just plain unacceptable and should never be tolerated. What I am trying to say is that you should not always feel the need to fight the good fight on every point, because sometimes it is not really 'the good fight' at all, sometimes it is just a chance for you to air your baggage and your narrow mindedness and your inability to accept change and differences.
Many teachers of spiritual enlightenment praise the ability to accept and receive change with open arms. They say that if you can master the art of accepting change as it arrives into your life than you will experience a state of true peace. And this, I believe is our biggest challenge as humans on this planet; we really need to accept but we feel like we are born to to fight. We feel compelled to resist, to pull back or even push back when our boundaries are tested, we are reluctant to change and we do not generally accept things that are new, different, unusual or of any inconvenience to us.
I do believe that acceptance can convert momentary happiness into enduring happiness when it is practised well, and I also think that there is great power in actually being happy and accepting things. I think that there is wisdom in knowing when it is the time to push back and when it is time to just let things happen without feeling the need to intervene or alter things. I think that we all need to get a little bit better at recognising those times for our own well being. As I said, I think that acceptance is the hardest skill to master in this life, but it may well be the most important one to master, and it could just be the key to unlocking our true happiness. 

Getting a little bit worn out now, just like everyone else, but still trucking on. I cannot afford to get too tired but I haven't exactly been leaving a lot of space in my life for rest at the moment. I haven't even been at home very much lately and I think that Craig is starting to feel like a widower; but there is not much that can be done about it. There really doesn't look like much respite on the horizon or anytime soon to be honest, so I'm just making my peace with busy and getting on with it all. Busy is just a side of effect of the season and when the dust all settles there will plenty of time for feet up and cocktails on the deck, so just keep calm and carry on I say. 
​I have pulled out all of my old Christmas movies and I am making my way through some of my favourites as the days to Christmas begin to countdown. I love an excuse to hit the couch for a couple of hours at this time of year, and a seasonal favourite can be just what the doctor ordered. 
I wish that I had a top ten of Christmas movie favourites to recommend, but I don't think that 10 really excellent Christmas movies actually exist, I could only think of nine that warranted three or more chili peppers:

1. The Nightmare Before Christmas (Kid Friendly)
2. A Christmas Carol (Kid Friendly)
3. It's a Wonderful Life (Fantasy)
4. Love Actually (Romance)
5. Gremlins (Fantasy)
6. The Grinch (Kid Friendly)
7. Go (Comedy)
8. The Night Before (Comedy)
9. Tangerine (Gritty)

To be fair Gremlins, Tangerine and Go are set during Christmas but aren't exactly Christmas tales, but they are totally great and worthy of a seasonal viewing; all nine of the above can be found on my genre lists if you need to see the full reviews and I have listed their genres next to them. Elf almost made the list and is a solid 2.5 Chili Peppers for me, and the rest of the Christmas movies that I have seen are, well.....meh. Generally Christmas movies are toxic, contrived crap-fests with poor and un-original storylines which is terribly annoying because people still want quality viewing at Christmas, or it that just me?
Anyway, there are lots of great vacation movies that are equally good to watch over the silly season, and one that always gets me laughing is Mr Bean's Holiday. I say ditch a shitty Christmas movies in favour of this one, what a ripper Summer holiday tale that is!

Spent my Sunday afternoon celebrating Craig's niece's expectant baby at her baby shower today. Lots of lady laughs and fun and games to be had as we sat about nibbling and chatting and rubbing the expectant tummy for the better part of the afternoon. There is nothing like an expectant baby to get ladies clucky and tongues wagging about labour experiences and the highs and lows of pregnancy. I am always surprised by the incredible clarity that women can recollect what is more than likely, one of the most challenging and/or painful experiences of their lives. 
Seriously, women can remember incredible details about the birthing process, like the exact time that their child was born, what the midwife said to them, how much their new baby weighed and how many hours they spent huffing and puffing to get them into the world. They remember which foods made them nauseous when they were pregnant and what the trip to the hospital was like, whether it was raining that day or not, how much facial hair the anaesthesiologist had and any number of other somewhat inane details surrounding the event. It is almost like those moments of time become permanently etched into a mother's memory, and every mother has their own unique tale to tell, like a battle wound or scar to bare of their heroic motherly efforts.
Personally I would rather not talk about my child birthing experiences, they weren't fun and they are not events that I look back on with fondness, in fact, they were really traumatic. However, I am more than happy to listen to the stories of others as long as it doesn't scare the shit out of the un-laboured women in the room. Some women's tales of labour woe are enough to frighten off the toughest potential mothers-to-be with their horrific recounts and I believe that some things are better left unsaid in that department.
Fortunately today, we didn't get a lot of that, just a lot of  talk about the discomforts of actually being pregnant. Craig's niece only has 6 weeks to go until ETA, and she still looks nicely compact to me. I remember looking like a sea cow when I was pregnant and feeling like a yeti, but some women just love to be pregnant.
I have no idea how women can be surrogates, being pregnant is so demanding on your body and you really do feel like an alien is going to launch itself from inside of you at any moment and you literally have no privacy when you are pregnant, your body is most definitely not your own. Why anyone would volunteer to do that to themselves for anyone else is beyond me, but I take my hat off to the ladies that can do it, I know I couldn't do it.
​I personally found pregnancy utterly over-rated, labour completely crapola and healing after the effect as much fun as finding a rogue turd in your shopping trolley, but hey, that's just me! I can't have found it too taxing, I did do it twice; and I would be lying if I said it wasn't all worth it, because a billion times over, it is all so very and completely worth it. That first look at the person that you have just made, well....it does make all of the bad stuff seem so very insignificant all at once, and that is one truth that I cannot deny. Your own newborn will most definitely take your breath away. 

There is really something special about the last term of a school year, and I don't just mean the terrifically long break that occurs at the end of term four, I mean that sense that another year has gone by, and with it, there has been a great deal of growth and development  that has been witnessed. It is that growth and development that keeps people in my industry going. It keeps the fire well lit in our belly, the hunger in our loins and gives us all that most sort after and important feeling that we so dearly long for - the feeling that we are making a difference. 
When you work in a school, term four really gives you the opportunity to reflect upon the last twelve months of your professional life. You get to see a clear record of the months that you poured all of your best intentions, your heart and your soul into the children that you worked with and you get to see all of your combined efforts come to fruition.
Yes, in term four, all of your hard spent efforts and days of endurance culminate into something very special indeed. Something quite tangible and also terrific because you get to see the change. The change for the better. It is literally what gets me up in the mornings; especially in term four when I am starting to get a bit over a lot of things as well, but that feeling of seeing a child fly by themselves without your help, it is just gold.
A child that couldn't read will be reading, a child that couldn't write will be writing, a child that couldn't count will be counting and most importantly, a child that didn't have any faith in themselves or self esteem, will be successful and will continue to succeed without your help. That is when you know that everything that you have done is worthwhile, that what you do really does matter and that all of your efforts weren't in vain; they amounted to something pretty tremendous, they helped someone to be more than what they were before. 
Term four is easily my favourite of all of the terms, because it is the term where I get to see some kids really find their feet and some even stretch their wings. So I never feel low when we return for the final stretch of the year, instead of saying - Oh lord, no not another round, I say once more with feeling, because there will be many tears of joy at graduation and many triumphs to celebrate with our students as we farewell them onto the next stage of their life journeys in a few short months time, and I can't wait to be there for it. 

Take up one idea. Make that one idea your life - think of it, dream it, live on that idea. Let the brain, muscles, nerves, every part of your body, be full of that idea, and just leave every other idea alone. This is the way to success.
-Swami Vivekananda

​Some interesting reading material with that quote at the top of the page found its way to me this week. I was immediately drawn in by those few lines and found myself reading an extensive article about a PLC vision; but at the heart of that article was a message about the power of positive thinking and envisioning clear positive outcomes, and it really got me thinking about whether or not  visualising positive outcomes can actually work.
We have all heard about (and in my case even read) 'The Secret' and we're all privy to the belief that focused and continued positive visualisation can make things happen or manifest into positive outcomes. But is there any real truth to this practise? Does it actually work, or is it just some new age malarkey to get you to waste your time? 
Elite athletes have been using the method of positive visualisation for many years as an integral part of their practise and preparation before competing, and coaches and trainers around the world swear by it's effectiveness. Turns out, that this method of mentally creating the ideal, is actually being used successfully in all walks of life. From scientists and revolutionists to housewives and hotel staff, positive visualisation techniques are being embraced and practiced everywhere, and with excellent results.
Musicians are using it to nail a difficult piece of music or to write their next album, performers are using it before they go on stage or arrive on set, writers are using it before they even put pen to paper, artists before the paint hits the canvas and therapists use it with their patients to help them to create their own successful outcomes before they happen. It would seem that if you aren't using this technique yet, then you are definitely behind the eight ball. 
Australian Psychologist Alan Richardson did a small and very significant experiment on the power of envisioning positive outcomes with a group of basketball players that had never used the technique before. He split the players into three groups and tested each player's ability to make free throws. For twenty consecutive days the first group practised throwing free throws for 20 minutes. The second group were only allowed to visualise themselves making free throws for 20 minutes a day and the third group did not do anything at all. Not surprisingly, the third group had no change at all, however, the group that only visualised that they were making the throws improved 23% which was only 1% less than the group that had physically practised doing the throws every day. This experiment proved that positive visualisation methods could definitely give a person a psychological edge on their competition, and the best news is that anyone can do it, it's super easy and it can be used by anyone for any purpose. 
According to online resources, it is best to do your visualising twice a day - first thing in the morning and right before you go to sleep, you should typically spending 10 minutes each time, amounting to 20 minutes of positive visualisation a day. There is actually a tonne of information online about the best way to do your visualisations (including youtube clips), but basically all you need to do is have your ideal goal clear before you begin and then relax, close your eyes and envision yourself in this perfect goal setting (eg. playing the piano perfectly) with as much clarity and detail as you can for ten minutes and then you're on your way.
By doing this practise, you are beginning to strengthen the pathways in your brain that will allow that thing to occur - sounds weird I know, but apparently it works. It is usually best to start with something small at first like waking up earlier or eating slower, and then once you've got some understanding of how it works and how long your brain takes to rewire itself, you can take on bigger things. 
Needless to say, I am going to give it a go. I am always keen to utilise the power of my brain and will never knock back a chance to grow for the better. I will most certainly keep you posted on my positive visions for a better future as I proceed, but I am definitely going to need to start small at first, even though I really want to visualise myself with a million bucks straight off the bat.
​Now I just have to think of something simple to get the ball rolling.....

Everyone at work is busying themselves at the moment. Years of documentation and school supplies are being unearthed from storage spaces and backroom cupboards as the senior part of the school makes a huge move to another learning area. The shifting of several classrooms, and all of that goes with it, is no small feat, and I am amazed at how swiftly and smartly this move has happened.
Thank goodness for the resilient and willing senior students and staff, who have all pitched in to make this transition run as smoothly as possible. I must say, that after only two days, the new area is shaping up to look mighty fine and completely workable. My generous team have even allocated me a terrific new 'nook' under the stairs, which may not sound that great, but it is far more spacious than the space that Harry Potter had, and a lot more private and cosy than the space that I previously had, so I am actually really pleased. The kids that I work with are super keen to get into that space and start working again, so the novelty of a new area could actually work in my favour. 
The proposed new learning areas will be amazing, and are certainly something to look forward to for next year. In the meantime, it's all in together - never mind the weather - for the next semester at least, and although this transition will ruffle a few feathers along the way, I am pretty sure that we can make it work. We have a good strong team that can rely on each other and I think that that is the magic formula that will see us all through this.
Only a couple of days until the end of another term and the halfway point of the school year. The final stretch leading up to a term break is always extremely hectic, so this is not new territory for any of us, but it is definitely a different way to end things. They say that change is as good as a holiday, and I am getting a good dose of both at the moment, so win-win.
I am really looking forward to this winter break, I have so many people to catch up with and things to get done, but I also just want a few sleep ins, some movie watching time and some curl up with a cuppa and a novel time. Zoe is celebrating her 20th birthday on Friday, (where did that 20 years go?) so that will be the kick off for these holidays. Can't wait to get the break started!

MOANA
Release Date: 2016
Rating: PG
Running Time: 113 mins
A sweeping CG animated adventure from Disney that boldly goes where no other Disney Princess movie has ever gone before by leaving out the love interest and giving the heroine total control over her own destiny. Yes, that's right, no prince character to be seen anywhere and a good dash of feminism that doesn't feel forced or heavy handed at all. 
A daring teenager named Moana is chosen by her ancestors and the sea to engage in a quest that will save the many islands of Oceania from wasting away. She must enlist the help of the mighty demigod Maui in order to fulfil her mission, but this demigod is not easy to wrangle. 
I was completely swept up in the exciting adventure and pace of this movie. The animation is incredible, the voice actors are perfectly cast, the soundtrack is fantastic and the character of Moana couldn't be more adorable. Disney have hit a bullseye here, Moana is right on the mark and very forward thinking. I far preferred this to Frozen, which I found intensely over-rated, and I was so relieved to see that the Disney Princess genre had fully redeemed itself in such a pleasant way. 
FINAL SAY: If you wear a dress and you have an animal sidekick, you're a princess.
4 Chilli Peppers ​

For three days from sunset on June 20th the Mid-Winter Solstice occurs. It is sometimes also called Yule or Alban Arthuan, and it's origins pre-date all organised religions. When early humans first saw the sun at its lowest point and all of the earth's vegetation was dead or dying, they feared that the light of the sun and life would not return to them. A tradition of lighting great bonfires began; lit torches would decorate evergreen trees that had been dragged into caves and homes (that's how the humble Christmas tree got its beginnings) and loved ones would gather in closely to shelter from the cold and gaze upon the light from those torches to remind themselves that light would return again one day soon and the earth would be green again.
These days it is clearly nothing nearly as dramatic as that, because science has taught us that the Mid-winter Solstice simply symbolizes the least amount of daylight hours, or the darkest days of the year. The sun never really gets very high in the sky at this time of the year, so the dawn occurs much later and the sunsets much earlier, making things seem very dreary indeed. On the upside, once we are past the darkest days we have much to look forward to. Days will now begin to get longer, the earth will start to awaken from it's Autumn and Winter slumbering and slowly, day by day we will move towards the warmer and brighter moments of Spring.
Every year Helen and I get together to celebrate this turning of the season, it has become somewhat of a tradition for us. This year we made a variety of homemade soups and a butterscotch pudding to enjoy by the light of many candles with a few generous libations of good wine. There is nothing like the comfort of home, a good friend, a loving family, some homemade comfort food, tasty wine and a cosy environment to push back the darkness and to keep you heading forward towards brighter days. For that I am truly blessed, because without these comforts in my life right now, this Mid-Winter Solstice would have swallowed me whole. 

SPIRITED AWAY 
Release Date: 2001
Rating: PG
Running Time: 125 mins
Hayao Miyazaki brings to life all of magic and intrigue of another world in this visually pleasing animation movie. If you are looking for PIXAR then don't look here, this is a delicate body of work with a whimsical soundtrack that enhances the refined animation style.
The film follows the adventures of 10 year old Chihiro as she delves into a fantasy world full of spirits, she's on a quest to save her parents who have been turned into pigs by the evil witch Yubaba. She encounters many weird and wonderful characters through her employment at the spirit bath house and must call on her inner courage and bravery, to overcome the many challenges that stand between her reunification with her parents. 
It is an intelligent piece of children's cinema and perplexing even to some adults,  a worthy watch. 
FINAL SAY: You'll be spirited away.
4.5 Chilli Peppers ​

It would be fair to say that I watch a shit load of movies. I don't always watch new movies though, so I don't get to the cinema as much as one would imagine. However, last year I still managed to watch about 220 movies over the course of the year, which is a pretty good effort I think, especially since I also watched about 30 TV series as well. 
In my pursuit of quality viewing, I naturally encounter some pretty dodgy shit as well, and I had more than my fair share of disappointments both at the cinema and on the couch over the past year.
​I felt that it was only fair to share my highlights and lowlights of 2016 with you, so that I may steer you in the right direction for any future viewings.
Please note that these are in no particular order.
The Best Movies of 2016:
The Hunt for The Wilderpeople
La La Land
Kubo and The Two Strings
Deadpool
The Jungle Book
The Lobster
Fantastic Beasts and Where to Find Them
Finding Dory
Swiss Army Man
The Witch
The Little Prince
10 Cloverfield Lane
Midnight Special
Zootopia
The worst films I saw in 2016 (not all 2016 releases):
Assassin's Creed
Alice Through the Looking Glass
Zoolander 2
Absolutely Fabulous: The Movie
Nice Guys
Central Intelligence
Suicide Squad
Chappie
Anomalisa
The Dressmaker
The best movies I watched in 2016 that were not actually released in 2016 (aka. catch-up movies) :
Youth
There Will Be Blood
American Hustle
The Revenant
Sightseers
Adaptation
Raging Bull
Scarface
Apocalypse Now
Tangerine
Hateful 8
The Room
Me and Earl and The Dying Girl
Straight Outta Compton
Wages of Fear
The Skin I Live In
The Best TV Series of 2016: 
Stranger Things
Broad City
Game of Thrones
A Series of Unfortunate Events
Dirk Gently's Holistic Detective Agency
Preacher
Twin Peaks
Haters Back Off!
Upper Middle Bogan
Love
Peaky Blinders
The Night Of
Better Call Saul
Raised by Wolves
Black Mirror
TV Series that I Tried to Endure 2016 but just couldn't:
Westworld
iZombie
Wayward Pines
​Scream Queens

So there you have it, the best and the worst of 2016 for me. Hopefully, you will be inspired to watch something on my good list, and even though the bad list stuff was shithouse to me, I know that many people will totally disagree with my choices.
In truth, I believe that all movies deserve to be seen, even the bad ones, because someone put their heart and soul into making them, so who am I say that they aren't worthy? At the end of the day, regardless of whether it's good, bad or ugly, it's all entertainment and that is never a bad thing in my mind. So with that, I will leave you with what I consider to be the most shamefully overlooked movie of 2016, a gem of a film and one that the whole family can enjoy. 

Kicked off the New Year quietly out in Enfield with a couple of friends, Zoe and Lachlainn and the two men in my life, Craig and Seth. No fanfare or hoo-har, just some good company, great music,  tasty eats and yummy beverages, what more can one ask for really?
​As the magical turning over of time from one year to another arrives, everyone goes bonkers creating resolutions that they probably won't live up to and promises to themselves that they more than likely will not keep. However, let me just put all of my skepticism and pessimism aside for now and firstly wish a very happy new year to everyone out there. I really do hope that you will be among the committed that actually does fulfill their resolutions and meet their personal goals. 
I used to be so gung-ho for goal setting every new year, often setting myself exhausting goals that I became completley OCD kooky about completing. And then one day I realised that I had mounted the crazy pony to nutter town with all of my intense goal setting bullshit, and that I was literally making myself miserable trying to get things done. So last new year, for the first time in many years, I just totally droppped it.
I didn't set myself any big goals, no resolutions.....nothing. That in itself was a massive achievement for me, because for many years I took a lot of pride in my ability to take on new things every year (even if it killed me). I have to say that dropping my self expectations may have been the best thing that I have ever done for myself. Without any pre-set goals for the year, I actually managed to get a shit load of 'self' work done, in my own time and as I wanted to. I transitioned into a space where I was actually living in the moment, taking on things as they presented themselves to me and going along at a pace that felt right at the time. Absolutely zen-ful stuff I tell you!
Without any mental prompting or agenda, I quit smoking this year. I haven't had a puff since May 2016, it's the longest non-pregnant non-smoking period of my life since I was 15 years old! I also took up yoga, which has been mentally and physically tranforming for me. I now practise daily and it has really helped to reduce my stress levels and to help me to accept the things that I cannot change.
There is really something to be said for being in the moment and letting go a little. My need to be in control has stifled an awful lot for me in the past, and even though it has taken me over forty years to realise that, I have finally arrived at a good place. 
So, no resolutions or goals for me in 2017. Instead I have made a simple self promise to immerse myself completely in every moment, and to seek my own bliss in those moments.
​Another year = 365 opportunites, and I don't want to miss any of them. 

Made it! 
Yes, I have happily ran the gauntlet that was Christmas 2016. I sang Christmas carols, went to see the twinkly Christmas lights around town, baked gingerbread and shortbread, ate many a roasted beast, opened extravagent gifts and had more than my fair share of champagne and Irish whiskey tipples. I have come out the other end of all of this with the realisation that we place far too much time, money and energy into one day of celebration (well more like three for me) but that's besides the point. What I am trying to say is that I saw a lot of stressed out faces, a lot of annoyed individuals and a lot of eye rolling this season and it made me feel a bit sad to be honest. 
Don't get me wrong, I totally got my merry on and mostly I was having a pretty terrific time; but I did see a lot of other people not having as much of a good time and clearly not feeling the Chistmas spirit very much at all. A lot of people that I encountered seemed to be generally enduring the gathering together process, rather than actually enjoying themselves, and well....that was a bit concerning to me. If you aren't having any fun at your Christmas get togethers, then you are doing it all wrong! 
If everyone is 'enduring' then the recipe is not correct. People should be all 'knees up mother Brown' at Christmas time, and most importantly they need to be really nice to each other because it is supposed to be the merriest holiday of the year. It is most certainly NOT the time to flick your bitch switch and get all fucking hostile and moody. It is absolutely imperative that you keep your personal issues on the back burner at Christmas, otherwise everyone walks away feeling like a piece of shit, swearing that they will never get together again and the whole point of even gathering together in the first place becomes utterly pointless. 
What you should be doing at Christmas gatherings is eating like a king and not worrying about your caloric intake. You should also have a least one good stiff drink (a lot more if you can get away with it) and give everyone at least one really good meaningful hug over the course of the day. You should get at least one awesome thing that you love the shit out of, anything on top of that is gravy. And you really must take some time out to reflect on how fricken lucky you are to have so many opportunities and luxuries and people to spend your time with. If you do all that, then your Christmas gatherings will always be fabulous, lose sight of that stuff, get caught up in the minor details or have a nasty turn and you will have gone all wrong with it. 
I must say, that in spite of some rather odd behaviours that I witnessed, I had a really tremendously good Christmas. I was so spoilt it was ridiculous! I ate some bloody delicious things, and I was generally being mighty merry in every way possible. It was a much better Christmas for me this year than the last one was, and I am now looking forward to a spectacular New Year as well.
I am loving the silly season this year!

THE JUNGLE BOOK
Release Date: 2016
Rating: PG
Running Time: 106 mins 
Here is a version of Rudyard Kipling's classic tale about the adventures of Mowgli the Man-cub that even he would've loved. This visually stunning, live action CGI was directed by Jon Favreau and produced by Walt Disney Pictures, who also produced the 1967 animated film of the same name, which is quite frankly left in the dust in the wake of this beautifully realized and captivating version. 
An orphaned human child named Mowgli has been raised in the wild by a wolf pack and a panther mentor. When he attracts the unwanted attentions of the ferocious tiger Shere Khan, he is sent away by his animal guardians to the safety of the nearest man village, but Mowgli does not want to leave the jungle or his animal family. 
Simply put, the animals are just 'out of this world' amazing in this film, I have not seen anything that comes close to this yet in terms of computer generated wildlife. I was completely spellbound, and spent half of the movie kicking myself that I hadn't gone to see it on the big screen. The animals have been perfectly voiced by Ben Kingsley, Idris Elba, Scarlett Johansson and Christopher Walken, but my favourite by a long mile was Bill Murray's marvelous portrayal of Baloo, the chilled out, honey craving bear that befriends Mowgli. 
This is high quality, engrossing, intelligent family entertainment, that should not be missed. 
FINAL SAY: For the strength of the pack is the wolf, and the strength of the wolf is the pack. 
4.5 Chili Peppers ​

God I love the school holidays!
It is so nice to be able to catch up on all of the things that I have put off for the better part of a term. Just having the chance to spend a bit of time laying in bed, reading a book and sipping coffee in the mornings, lingering over long lunches and indulging in all of my personal vices...ahhhh... it is truly heaven on a stick. 
I really don't envy people that only get four weeks of leave a year, it is bloody criminal. Four weeks a year is really not enough leave to sate anyone's need for a break. Only 20 work free days out of 250 odd possible work days per year is ridiculous. Who came up with the five day working week anyway? It is clearly not a very balanced set up is it? Four on and three off seems a bit more fitting, and if you are going to put in five days a week, then you should get a couple of weeks every quarter to recharge the batteries and indulge in doing fun stuff. Besides it is also the time when everyone's kids are on holidays, and it seems so unfair to make parents miss out on valuable holiday/bonding time with their kids. We need to have another look at this crappy annual leave system, I would guarantee that people would be a shit load happier if they got a break every quarter, and probably a lot more productive too. 
My holiday breaks are like holy days to me. I use them to the very best of my ability to not only take some rest and recovery time, but to also reconnect with family and friends and to get some purely self orientated things done. I am a huge advocate for doing things that serve no real purpose but to make you feel good; self time is vital to a happy and fulfilling life.
Since holidays started five days ago, I have started a new painting and a new novel, almost completed knitting a scarf that I started about a year ago and binge watch a couple of TV series. I have managed to frame the art pieces that I brought back from Singapore, and I finally got all of my photos developed from the trip too, just need to put them into an album now. I've had a delicious lunch with a friend, gone shopping, cleaned the house from top to bottom, stripped and cleaned out the spare room wardrobe and of course, gone to the movies. Not what I would I call a waste of time, and God I am thankful for the time to do it! 
Been a while since I saw anything at the movies that I deemed good enough to put onto my Hall of Fame list, especially a children's film, but it has happened. If you are taking any kids to see a movie these holidays, I cannot recommend this film enough, it is amazing. Go see it on the big screen while you can. 

The bi-annual school concert last night went really well. Apart from a few minor hiccups, which one can only expect when we're talking about wrangling 300 odd tired primary school kids through two major performances that didn't end until 10pm. All things told, it was actually really good. Even the staff all pulled together, costumed up and managed to produce a reasonably decent dance routine to the original theme song from Ghostbusters, complete with a silly string squirting slimer character that managed to delight and also freak out some kids. And just like that, it is over and done with for another 2 years, and I can't say that I am not glad to have it all done and dusted. 
Knocked things back a bit today, kids (and staff) were all really tired so the expectation to be super productive was on the low down, which I was grateful for. Rocked up in my comfy clothes knowing that it was not going to be my most professional work day ever, and nestled in for the morning with the kids that did make it to school to watch Fantastic Mr Fox. Those of you that have visited my 'Hall of Fame' list would know that it is the only children's movie to have made that list, and it is a movie that is sincerely near and dear to my heart. Directed by one of my all time favourite directors Wes Anderson, and written by one of my favourite children's authors Roald Dahl, how can it not be a winner? 
Anyway, this term I read the Fantastic Mr Fox novel with a number of children in reading groups, and had promised them a viewing of the film. Today seemed like the best day to indulge in that promise since it is the end of the term and everyone was knackered after last night's stint, but I didn't even realise that it was also the 100 year anniversary of Roald Dahl's birthday yesterday. This made it seem like it was not only amazingly appropriate to view the film today in homage to his book, but downright necessary!  And so it was, I sat at work this morning sipping coffee and sharing one of my favourite children's movies of all time with a bunch of Grade 5/6 kids. A bloody nice way to spend a Wednesday morning if I do say so myself.
​So cheers to you Mr Dahl, thanks for being such an awesome writer and leaving behind such an amazing body of work that is still enchanting children and adults like me, one hundred years on. 

Everyone remembers the weird kid that went to their school. It might have been the kid that always had snot hanging out of their nose, or the strange teeth/ dorky haircut kid, or the kid who always looked dirty or had head lice all the time or something, but there was just something about this one kid that you remember. It was never a good thing that made the weird kid memorable either, they had something about them that you definitely didn't want to have yourself. 
Their were a couple of stand out weird kids for me growing up. One in particular in primary school that I can recall was a really smelly girl called Monica. She had a truly weird scent about her; I may be able to identify that smell as an adult and probably not think of it as that weird, but back then, my young and stupid brain thought that Monica really stank. You see, I don't remember what she stank of exactly, I just remember that everyone knew that she stank. I don't think that I ever picked on her about it or anything, but I do recall that she was generally a bit of an outcast, some kids did give her a tough time and looking back on it, we all treated her pretty badly just because she smelt weird.
Generally speaking, kids are bloody ruthless mutha fuckers when it comes to ostracizing other kids. Any sign of weirdness and boom, you're on the outer and labeled the weird kid for all of eternity. Even years later, when the weird kid works that 'weird shit' out that made them weird and sorts it out, they still never really bounce back to full status again. Let's be honest, we know that this is true because we can still clearly recall the weird kid from our childhood, we never forget those labels, that horrid shit sticks.
I recall being deathly afraid of being singled out, especially when I was in primary school. Being accepted by your peers was a right of passage, and I wanted in. I often chose to align myself with kids that were way cooler and more popular than myself in an attempt to be part of the crowd, unfortunately a lot of them were also assholes. ​It wasn't until I got to my upper years at secondary school that I worked out what an ostracizing load of shit it was all was and how little I actually gave a fuck about what my peers thought of me. But the years leading up to that realisation were hardly glittering, and when I think of the petty shit that I accepted as good reasons to ostracize someone, I feel pretty horrible. 
Poor Monica, I wonder if she ever recovered from being called stinky all those years ago. I know that some of the cruel crap that was said to me as a kid has certainly had an affect on the type of adult I have become, I can't imagine that being the weird kid would be easy to forget. Sometimes I do wonder about the weird kids, and how they all turned out. I like to think that they all got successful and super happy and are going to bed content every night, secretly flipping us all the bird as they climb into their four poster beds with their super hot partners.
All that I know for sure is that I am genuinely sorry to anyone that I may have upset or offended over my formative years, a time when my brain was under construction and I was probably a total dickface. And sorry to Monica, wherever you are now, for going along with the smelly thing in primary school and allowing the other kids to make you feel like shit, that was not cool of me at all. I hope that you can forgive me as you climb out of your bubble-bath spa, smelling like a rose and banging your Fassbender look alike husband every night under your Egyptian cotton sheets, I so hope you can. 

We all need inspiration in our lives. We all need someone to look up to and admire, it's healthy to admire the strength, beauty and commitment of other people. I am regularly inspired and fascinated by my wonderful children and partner, my fabulous friends and my family, but there are other far less accessible people that I am also very glad to have in the world with me. 
There are people in the world that I know that I will never meet, but they have had a profound effect on me as a person. They are muses to me, inspirations if you will, people that have made a connection with me through their art, their music, their words and of course, their cinematic efforts. They have struck a chord in my heart and I have made an invisible and yet quite meaningful connection to them, they are my 'unknowable inspirations'. 
Unlike my everyday inspirers that I can call upon any time (whom I am eternally grateful for also) my 'unknowable inspirers' will never ever know me, they will never know the impact that they have had upon me, they will never know that they gotten me through some tough times in my life with their wisdom and their truth. 
​Your 'unknowable inspirations' are the types of people that you would have over for dinner if you could invite anyone in the world to share a meal with you, dead or alive. 
So, who would you invite to dinner?
​People often opt to invite someone esoteric like Jesus around, just to see if he was a real person or not, and although that idea is somewhat intriguing to me, I would much rather chew the fat with someone that has shown me a new way of thinking or a new way of being. I want to have dinner with a person that has inspired me to do new things, or create something amazing, or given me hope, strength or humour when I needed it. I wouldn't want to waste my 'dinner with anyone' ticket to spend the night listening to Jesus preach or arguing with Hitler. 
I would be more than happy to share my dinner table with any of the following people, because they have all been inspiring to me at some point in my life so far: 
Orsen Wells                                  
Conan O'Brien                                  
Leonardo DaVinci
Tim Burton                                      
Hayao Miyazaki                              
Lena Dunham
Clive Barker                                    
Myf Warhurst                                  
Quentin Tarantino 
Jack Nicholson                                                                             
Anthony Bourdain
Lucille Ball                                       
Annie Leibovitz                                  
Bill Murray
Anne Rice                                        
Nick Cave                                            
Roald Dahl 
Rowan Atkinson                          
Guillermo del Toro                          
Joss Whedon 
Robin Williams                              
Bjork                                                      
​Isabella Rossellini 
​I know that I will never really share a meal with any of these people at any point, but I am just so glad that they are (or have been) in the world and I'm really thankful for all of the 'unknowable inspiration' that they have given to me over the years. 

I know that I have said that there have been many times that I could easily have strangled my husband, but I would be lying if I didn't also say that there are times when I fall madly in love with him all over again. That's how it is in relationships, sometimes it's a total shit sandwich and then other times you're staring dreamily at your significant other thinking that they are the best thing since sliced bread. 
It would be fair and reasonable to say that Craig and I are having one of those 'god you're amazing' kinds of weekends. A weekend where we are both just happy to laze about in each others arms on the couch, watching crap, drinking coffee and chilling out. It's easy, and that's one the best things about being married for over 20 years, sometimes it's 'easy' to be together. We don't have to be talking or planning or doing anything together, we can just chill out together, no strings attached, no agenda, just a couple of unencumbered days to be at peace together.
These are just the best days, my favourite days. Sitting up in bed on a Sunday morning, sipping a cuppa, tapping on the ipad or reading a book, rubbing our feet together under the covers but not saying a damn word for hours. You can't buy anything that good, you just can't. 
It is in these golden moments that I look at Craig and see all of the reasons that I fell in love with him in the first place and why we have stood the test of time. I think that it is because it gets easier as you go along, you stop having anything to prove and you just start 'be-ing' together. That person propped up on the pillow next to you knows you, really knows you and isn't expecting anything from you, they are just happy to chill with you, and that is such a lovely feeling. 
I actually regularly fall in love with Craig all over again, it happens at least a couple of times every year where I find that I cannot get enough of him and he just encompasses everything that is good in my world all over again, and it often happens when I least expect it to as well, which is really nice. I think that you need to fall in love with your spouse again regularly, that first rush sensation and early infatuation is far too much fun to simply kiss goodbye forever. Call me a romantic, but I believe that true love never dies, it just simmers away on the back burner waiting to be reignited again, and from my experience, it just burns brighter with every re-ignition. 

With only two short weeks to go, I have finally kicked into proper holiday mode. I have started to sleep later, maybe because I am really burning the midnight oil and rarely hitting the sack much before 2am at the moment, I just have too many movies and TV series to watch! I have also started to chill out and relax, I have cast off the stress, I just don't have room or time for trouble, worry and strife. I have been indulging in all of my self healing activities like drawing and painting, reading, taking regular walks in nature and just being a lot more gentle with myself, that usually does the trick for me.
I took Seth and his friend out to my old teenage haunting ground at Jubilee Lake in Daylesford yesterday. What a blast from the past, I even managed to find the treacherous path that I used to walk everyday between the lake and my house, still there after all these years, albeit a lot more covered in blackberries now. I can still see the attraction of the place, perhaps even more as an adult, it is deeply peaceful and tranquil out there. The ancient trees and lush undergrowth seems to whisper they are so alive and the gentle rippling water is hypnotic and enticing. 
Whilst the boys paddle-boated around in the glorious sunshine, I sat under an old willow tree by the bank of the lake and read my book in the cool shade. We enjoyed some fresh salad rolls for lunch and then walked around the lake and visited the carbonated spring water pump, that has clearly had a major overhaul since my teens. The taste of that eggy, fizzy, sulphated water took me back alright, I never used to carry a water bottle back in the day, so I would often head out to the spring to quench my thirst. I recall it having a more offensive taste as a kid, I actually thought that it tasted pretty good yesterday and it was chilled, just goes to show you how your tastes do change and mature as you get older. 
Filled with nostalgia, and adequate time to smell the flowers, run my hands through the lake waters and observe the butterflies and bees busy at work, I feel quite rejuvenated. If nothing else, I have really learned to identity my personal triggers and my releases this year, which is actually a very zen way to start the year, perhaps it's a sign of better times ahead, but in the very least it is a sign that I am getting to know myself a lot better which is quite possibly the very best outcome of all.

Must say a fond farewell to David Bowie, who left the planet this week. You made me want to be taken by the goblins as a teenager, you made me rock out loud and proud flying my freak flag on many occasions and you were every bit a rock legend 'with your silicone hump and your ten inch stump'. Your music will live on forever. Take your protein pills and put your helmet on David, safe journeys....

As a kid, the days leading up to Christmas always seemed to stretch on forever. There was a sense of good things to come, but the those final days between school ending and Christmas Day always seemed agonizingly long and incredibly hot when I was a child. I recall despising the days before Christmas as a kid, I was bored beyond bored back then. No-one was trying to entertain me or make the time go along any quicker, so the days would stretch on forever.
It was all "time to make your own fun" for my folks, which may have worked in the 1950's but did not work at all in the 1980's. I spent endless hours riding my bike up and down the street in the sweltering heat wishing that someone would bake gingerbread with me or do anything with me for that matter, and the hours felt like weeks. All of my friends had already taken off for their Christmas holidays to the beach or somewhere that seemed infinitely cooler than anything I had planned, or at least that's what I thought back then anyway.
I always wanted the lead up to Christmas to mean something more for my kids. Not more gifts or things, just more of a sense of being together and enjoying the anticipation rather than enduring it. We have whiled away our time with games, Christmas themed movies, trips to see the Christmas Lights and Myers' window displays, long lunches out and on the deck, and now that we have reached Christmas Eve it is time to bust out a little holiday baking and cooking as a means to get the final 24 hours to speed along; especially for Seth who doesn't have the luxury of a little afternoon tipple and a nap to make the time seem so much brighter and briefer. 
So tonight is the night, the night before Christmas, the night to stack the presents under the tree, to fill the stockings and enjoy the company of your loved ones.
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And I shall roast up a beast - trimmed with delicious things
So my family may feast in the glow of tiny lights on strings
And then we will gather to watch our favourite pre-Christmas show
With a delightful dessert, a seasonal drink, and no threat of snow
And toasting the evening, we'll then take to our beds
And rest with anticipation swimming 'round in our heads....

Merry Christmas to all of my wonderful readers, I hope you all enjoy a marvelous and magical Christmas filled with all of the best things that the season has to offer xxx

Jeez, some people really aren't at the best around the lead up to the holiday season are they? I do understand being tired and everyone knows that the last days are always seem to be the longest, but seriously - chill the fuck out people! 'Tis the season to be jolly, not the season to act like a total tool and lose your shit over every little thing. 
Just yesterday, I was driving through a roundabout and some guy forgot to use his indicator to turn and I almost ran into him, did I shout or anything? No, I just raised my hands in a "what was that about?" gesture, to which he proceeded to wind down his window, flip me the bird and call me a stupid fucking cunt. Bit of an over-reaction I thought, especially since I wasn't the one who forgot how to drive! And I felt embarrassed, which is ridiculous because I had done absolutely nothing wrong, and I was thinking to myself - what kind of horse-shit is this? I mean really, what the hell is wrong with some people these days? 
And today at work, a day where we didn't really have to deal with hordes of children, a day to just get a few end of year things sorted out and knock it down a notch, a whole lot of people were acting like angry beavers and spent the day grumbling around like the jam was outta their donuts. Why? It is literally two days away from the end of the year and if you ask me, that is something to be happy about! I just don't understand why everyone is so cranky, what happened to good will unto others? Why is everyone being so Grinchy all of a sudden? Well I am not buying into it, I am not letting anyone rain on my parade, I'm going out in a zen like fashion, just as I promised myself I would, with a smile on my face and a spring in my step. The work year is almost over and there are just too many good things to look forward to right now, so to all of you grumblers and moaners- well I am flipping you the bird because no one's taking the jam outta my donut this Christmas! 

A quiet last weekend to Spring, and with Summer, the silly season and the end of Term 4 rapidly approaching it was probably just as well. Seth returned from camp looking like an extra from The Walking Dead. He barely had the ability to string a complete sentence together for the first 24 hours that he was home, but eventually we got the run down on what appears to have been a stock standard school camping trip, with all of the trials and tribulations that come with taking 100 odd pre-teens out to the wilderness for a few days. 
Managed to 'chore' around the house for hours on end, it always feels like things are piling up around this time of the year. You notice the dust and dirt a lot more on sunny days, which leaves you feeling dreadfully obligated to crack on with some Spring cleaning. The problem is that once you start, you always find more things that require your attention. Honestly, I can get a headache just going to check the mailbox if I don't divert my eyes from the mounting pile of "things that need to be done." 
But that is what the Summer holidays are for, catching up on stuff and finishing off all of those 'started but not yet done' jobs around the house. We are kicking it down a notch these holidays, no whirlwind trips or vacations, just some solid down time to get some things done around here and spend some family time together since this is Zoe's last Summer holiday with us at home. I'm still not really ready to address the reality of what that actually means  just yet I'm afraid, I'm giving myself until 2016 to accept that as a real truth. 
So, only three working weeks to go, and then freedom! Mind you, I do have a shit load to get though before I can high five myself about the break just yet, but the end is well in sight now. So, from this point on the weekends will get far more hectic, the functions will commence and the chaos that is Christmas will begin. It's all good, taking it a day at a time, living in the moment and promising myself to not get stressed out. I'm just going to savor this exciting time of great anticipation for what it is. 

In the last week I have been faced with two fractured bones, one happened to a child at school and then last night Seth came home from school complaining of a sore knee, which four hours later in the emergency ward was discovered to be a cracked and chipped patella. 
It is strange how things like this seem to happen in a series, a series of not so wonderful events. I think that I have had my fill of broken things for a while now, thanks karma, not much fun I'm afraid. 
There is nothing more sobering and hideously boring than a spell in the emergency ward. After almost three hours of mind-numbing waiting, we finally got an x-ray. Might not have been so bad if the woman beside me had showered in the last decade, Jesus - that was horrific! And there was also a woman in her dressing gown that arrived as we did, claiming that she had accidentally poisoned herself and was going to die, naturally I let her jump ahead of us, only to find her sitting two seats down from us ten minutes later inhaling a packet of chicken chips! Who knew that chicken chips had such magical healing properties? 
The worst part of it was that we hadn't eaten dinner before we left, so Seth was ready to eat the upholstery off my car by the time we got home, around 10.20pm, which seemed three times longer given the fact that we had nothing in our stomachs and no entertainment aside of their TV which was running with the sound turned down and airing the most dull programming in history. My own fault, I had seriously forgotten the hideousness and relentless insanity of the ER, so shame on me really. Anyway, it is fair to say that they must have been having a hot night, and that I don't want to do that again any time soon.