After passing along covid to the entire family for Christmas we all found ourselves back together for new years eve. I mean, no risk of anyone getting sick if everyone's already riddled with the contagion right? There was little point to us all isolating from each other when we were all carrying the same strain and generally feeling fine; so, all of us 'sickies' congregated on the deck out here in Enfield to share a few nibbles and drinks, listen to some tunes and make some resolutions.
And looking back across the landscape of 2022, it really wasn't a bad year by any stretch of the imagination. Sure, things got a bit pear shaped towards the end, but generally speaking things were pretty cruisy and I got to do so many things once everything opened up again and the world got rolling again.
Here are some of my personal highlights from 2022: 
JANUARY: 30 Days of Yoga with Adriene, Smoker arrives in Enfield, Seth's 17th birthday, Bridal dress shopping with Zoe, Seeing Harry Potter - The Cursed Child in Melbourne, tuning in to the Triple j Hottest 100, Paint Your Mate event. 
FEBRUARY:  Chinese New Year celebrations, Smythesdale Fiesta, Ghost Hunting at Blackwood Pub, Spa day with Craig, Summersalt Music Festival, Blackberry picking. 
MARCH: Deep Blue Spa Day, My friends and family being a huge support to me when I had covid on my birthday!
APRIL: Easter Sunday with the family, April holiday break, ELVIS exhibition in Bendigo, Metal detecting with Ben and Zoe, Craig's Mustang arrived.
MAY: A trip to the Gisborne markets, Mother's Day, Spicywatch's 8th Birthday, Tour of the Old Ballarat Gaol, Seth's formal, Barwon Manor Ghost Hunt, Seth's Deb Ball. 
JUNE: Illuminate at the Bendigo Stupa, Mushrooming, Salem is born, Port Campbell Road Trip, Psychic expo, Winter School Holidays, Creswick Ghost Hunt, Zoe's 25th Birthday.
JULY: Winter Movie Marathon nights,  Road trip to Barwon Heads, Twin Peaks show at Hepburn Springs, POCO Short Film Festival, a trip to the Clunes markets. 
AUGUST:  Salem joined our family, The LUME gallery - Van Gogh exhibition, completed the Heritage walk, Book week dress up. 
SEPTEMBER: Father's Day, Spring School Holiday Break, Kyneton Ghost Hunting, High Tea at Fortuna, Girls Road Trip. 
OCTOBER:  Mother of the Bride dress shopping, Seth's last day at Damascus, Yoga Festival in Bendigo, Pumpkin carving, Halloween horror movie/ dinner night.
NOVEMBER: Hen's weekend in Melbourne with Zoe, High Tea at The Grand Hyatt, Zoe and Ben's wedding in Hepburn, Grade 4 Camp at Narmbool, Seth's Year 12 graduation, Spa day with Craig, 28th Wedding Anniversary.
DECEMBER: Carols event, Renault Koleos arrived, Summer Holidays kicking off, Christmas, fishing at Jubilee Lake. 

Pretty fair to say that even in spite of having had covid twice this year (once on my birthday and once at Christmas), getting my poor car's face pranged in and having to navigate the financial pitfalls of 2022, I have still had a really lovely year. 
There is a lot here to celebrate and appreciate that's for sure. And on top of all of that, I have also managed to squeeze in:

• Daily meditation.
• 62 books.
• Workouts - 5 times a week.
• 185 movies.
• 10,500 steps a day.
• 158 TV series.
• 42 brunches/ lunches and  delicious restaurant meals with family and friends. 
• A daily French lesson on Duolingo.
• Brain Gym everyday for 10 minutes a day.
• And....I reviewed another 45 movies on Spicywatch.

Woohoo! That's a lot of 'doing' for one year! 
And now, as 2023 gently unfurls itself before me I wonder what will arrive in the next 12 months. Only time will tell, but let's hope it's as exciting as the last year was for me. 

C'MON C'MON 
Release Date: 2021
Rating: M
Running Time: 109 mins 
A touching and truly effecting drama that was written and directed by Mike Mills. It's been a while since I have watched something this genuinely raw and real. With an undeniable sweet chemistry between Joaquin Phoenix and Woody Norman and filmed in moody black and white, this tale about an uncle and his nephew transcends in the simplest and purest of ways. 
Johnny and Viv have become estranged siblings since the painful death of their mother from dementia. When Johnny reaches out to Viv for the first time in a year he is saddened to hear about the struggles that she has been having managing her estranged husband's mental wellbeing. Viv reveals that she needs to be with her husband as they try to find him the correct care but doesn't have a carer for her nine year old son Jesse. Johnny volunteers to care for his nephew whilst Viv deals with her husband, and he and Jesse embark on a life changing road trip together. 
This is a stunningly beautiful movie about family loyalties, caring for others and uncovering unknown and foreign aspects of ourselves. The struggles and the triumphs feel incredibly plausible and as a parent, very relatable. The fragility and the strength of the ties that bind us to those we love are explored in sensitive and heartfelt ways and the cast is exceptionally good all round. 
C'mon C'mon is unmissable viewing, and it's definitely one of the best dramas to come out of 2021, so make the time to see it whenever you can. 
FINAL SAY: In your confusion and delight, you will forget where you came from.
4.5 Chilli Peppers ​

Since my last blog post, we have experienced a string of rather unfortunate events. I guess that it was bound to happen eventually, we were riding pretty high on the wave of good fortune and happy times, and even the stupidest people know that nothing stays like that forever. To every action there is an equal and opposite reaction and well, I think we have gotten ours. 
On the day that I was to collect my new car, yep, you heard right, a new car - I got a new car for Christmas! I told you we were riding the wave high! A flash car too, a brand new Koleos Intens Renault, flash as hell with all the trimmings and a pearl white glaze, a real beauty! It was the last day that I would ever have to drive my darling Penelope (my Holden Cruz) before she was handed over to Seth for his 18th birthday. I was dropping Craig off at his work to collect his work ute after his break up the night before when an old, half deaf and clearly half blind guy backed his massive 4WD with a tow ball into the front of Penelope. Poor Penelope! Her beautiful face all crumpled up!
Okay, not so bad, the car is still 100% working, a little uglier but it wasn't our fault, I'll just get the quote done and get her all fixed up to hand over to Seth in January. Turns out that the old fellows insurance company only uses one repair place in Ballarat, which is fully booked until March! So poor Penelope has to go about with her face caved in for the next few months and we have to give the car to Seth with her face caved in which is just as sad. Ahhhh! So not the way we planned for things to go. 
And then I collected my Koleos and the sun came out and the world didn't look so shitty again. I have called my new car Pierre. Firstly because he is French and secondly because Koleos means testicles in Latin and sheath in Greek, so with a collective meaning of dick and balls I could hardly give it a lady name could I? And so Pierre was born. We took Pierre out to stretch his legs the following day when we drove to Ararat to take my mum out for an early Christmas lunch. This is where we encounter our next wave of shit.
Unbeknownst to mum, she had contracted covid, and yep, you guessed it, so did we! Between then and now we have all succumbed to the dreaded lurgy and our second round of covid for 2022. I have been forced to cancel all of my plans for the week which included a breakfast gathering with my friends, a day out/ lunch/ drinks with Helen and my new years plans with Zoe and Ben which did include tickets to an escape room. Talk about a bummer, got me a brand new whip and I can't even take him out! We are all housebound and robbed of a week of holiday adventures. I want to say that I don't care, but I do. It's shithouse, it's annoying and it's massively inconvenient.  
However, what goes up must come down, and so it goes. No point carrying on about it, it happened. There was nothing we could've done to prevent any of it, none of it was our fault, it just happened. Did we want Penelope to get her face smashed in and have another a round of covid for Christmas? Nope! But there is fuck all that we can do about any of that, so it's time to find the shine in the grime and embrace the distaste. I now have more than enough time to get Spicywatch.com back up and thumping. I can set up my diary and journal for 2023. I can clean up the house, take down the Christmas decorations and get some yard work done.  I can put firm plans in place for 2023 and research cool road trips for Pierre to take me on. Yeah, I can turn this misfortune into a good use of my time and get some things sorted. I'm gonna pull myself out of this funk, shake off the blues and use this time to my advantage. 

THE BLUES BROTHERS 
Release Date: 1980
Rating: M
Running Time: 133 mins 
An American musical comedy directed by John Landis that has since become a cult classic. In 2020, The Blues Brothers was selected for preservation in the United States National Film Registry by the Library of Congress for being "culturally, historically or aesthetically significant."
Jake Blues is finally reunited with his brother Elwood after being released from prison. However, the brothers soon discover that the catholic home they were raised in is about to be closed. Determined to save it, they plan to throw a huge benefit concert. But first, they have to get the old band back together and embark on a wild, police chasing, road trip to make that happen. 
Originally a skit on Saturday Night Live, The Blues Brothers is a virtual who's who of Blues and Soul music and features musical performances from James Brown, Aretha Franklin, Ray Charles and John Lee Hooker to name but a few. And if you don't get a lot out of the storyline here, that's okay; the energetic and lively soundtrack makes this worth seeing on its own. 
John Belushi is at his absolute best here and even Dan Aykroyd, whom I am not a big of, manages to impress. Sure it's utterly implausible and deeply silly and makes very little sense at all, but it does rock very hard, and for that reason, it's definitely worth a look. 
FINAL SAY: We're on a mission from God. 
3.5 Chilli Peppers ​

I have no idea what happened to most of December, or November, or most of the second half of this year to be truthful. I know that it happened, I can recall specific events and I know that a lot of amazing, exciting and happy things happened, but the time period is sketchy to say the least. It feels like this year has travelled at break-neck speed and swept me along with it. It's been beautiful and busy, filled with outrageous good fortune and wellbeing and although I haven't ticked off all of my 'to do's' for the year yet, I can say without a word of a lie that I have had a tremendous time. 
In the last few weeks I've squeezed in a Christmas Carols and a KK event, ticked off the staff Christmas parties for both Craig and I, had an early family Christmas gathering with the in-laws, hosted a long lunch on the deck, attended Christmas church service twice and kindly fare-welled all of my work colleagues for the summer break. 
Yesterday, I joyfully finished work for the year and now I have the better part of six weeks off. Six weeks! Wow, it's almost too good to be true. And I am at the very best part of it all, the start and the week before Christmas at that! A whole swag of good stuff in store for the next few weeks, not to mention getting old Spicywatch.com back up and cranking again. I have really let my blog and movie reviewing fall to the wayside this year and although I had good intentions to complete all of my 'to review' movie list this year, I still have 39 films to go. The problem is that I keep watching new stuff and then I have new reviews to do as well. I guess 39 is really manageable though, so 2023 is looking really good for finally nailing my back catalogue of movies and adding them to the lists. 
Seth and I have begun to explore the Christmas themed viewing genre again in the last week and we have noticed that there is a huge, if not colossal, array of really shitty and very average Christmas themed movies (many of which appear to be attempting rom-com) available on streaming services at the moment. I mean there are so many of them, and they literally all just popped up out of nowhere and seem to have a bunch of unknowns starring in them as well. I have given them a very wide berth and opted for a couple of oldies but goodies to get the Christmas vibes going. 
Last night we stumbled on Silent Night (see review below) and although I really liked it, it's not what I would call a 'feel good' Christmas tale. We have also really enjoyed re-watching some Aussie faves like The Moody Christmas series and Da Kath and Kim Code, neither of which ever fail to satisfy. We are saving Spirited (the new Will Ferrell Christmas movie) for Christmas Eve and we will still squeeze in a few more gems before the big day. It's just lovely to be able to waste a little time in front of the TV to be honest, finally it's time to exhale again!

SILENT NIGHT
Release Date: 2021
Rating: M
Running Time: 92 mins 
If it's fuzzy, feel-good Christmas viewing material that you after, then don't look here! Silent Night, written and directed by Camille Griffin, is certainly not fuzzy or feel-good in any way, we found that out the hard way when we chose to watch this the week before Christmas and got a little more than we had bargained for. However, if you like apocalyptic tales of terror and doom, them this will be right up your alley. 
This Christmas is a super special occasion for a group of friends who meet up every year, and that is because there is an imminent, deadly and unavoidable environmental catastrophe due to arrive within the next 24 hours.. The British government has issued suicide pills for a quick and easy death before the cloud hits Britain. As their final hours roll around, the friends and their children wrestle with their mortality and the morality of their situation. 
This film is terrifically cast with Matthew Goode, Keira Knightley, Roman Griffin Davis and Annabelle Wallis heading the line up, but in truth the entire cast carry this tale to new dimensions, and even the children are superb here. 
Silent Night may not be the brightest pre-Christmas watch, but it does pack an unforgettable punch. 
FINAL SAY: 
3 Chilli Peppers ​

Your body is sending you signals all of the time. Most of the time we are so wrapped up in whatever we are doing that we fail to hear or recognise these signals. When this happens, we get lethargic, we feel weary and sometimes we even get ill. In extreme cases we can even suffer disease, serious sickness or worse still; incurably poor health.
Recently a lot of research and energy has gone into understanding our bodies as a type of eco-system. An individually and uniquely designed system that needs to be in balance to thrive and blossom. Our bodies need balance, rest, nutrients and attention in order to work at peak performance, so ignoring even the most subtle of messages can spell disaster down the track if it goes unnoticed. 
So what should we keep an eye out for? To be honest any signal of imbalance should be treated as serious and dealt with right away in order to quell further problems, but it is a good idea to know what some of those subtle differences may be and potentially what they could be indicating. 
Let's start at the top of the body and work our way down from there. The head is a vitally important part of our body, it houses our brain, eyes, ears, nose and mouth, not to mention it is often fully exposed to the elements much of the time and can therefore also be prone to skin eruptions and abrasions. In short, head signals can be very unforgiving and frequent. 
Headaches can be a sign of feeling overwhelmed or having difficulty dealing with new demands, this in turn can lead to sleeping difficulties, a lack of alertness or agency and can cause people to lose control of situations around them. Any headache or brain discomfort should be investigated immediately by a trained physician, as should any interruptions to the senses of the face such as sight, hearing, smelling or tasting. Many stress, anxiety and anger signals are triggered around the face and head and can indicate a need for attention, therapy or adjustment. If you have frequent headaches it can indicate a serious underlying condition and you should seek medical advise asap. 
Down to the chest we go and we are on the look out for any shortness of breath or laboured and uneasy breathing. Chest pressure can be your bodies way of signalling potential threats or fear of the unknown and it can be alleviated through calming and meditative practises. Of course, any serious chest or breathing problems should always be checked by a professional, but recognising when your body is reacting to certain situations will allow you to better understand when the need for professional intervention is required and when it is not. Hundreds of people rock up to the emergency department every year with chest pains and breathing difficulty claiming to be having a heart attack when they were really just have a panic or anxiety attack. This is why it is important to get to know your body so that you can decipher what it is trying to tell you. 
Heading down further we encounter the gut. The gut is a labyrinth of nerve endings and a biome of its own that resides within your lower abdomen. Recent studies believe that the gut is every bit, perhaps even more, complex than the human brain. It appears that we store much of our stress, anxiety and worry in our gut and any digestive problems or changes in appetite can be a call to attention around unresolved issues and emotional baggage. Gut feelings really are gut feelings, and recent research into the gut is revealing a multitude of fascinating and important body hacks about the gut, so keep your ear to the ground on this topic because I think we are going to be seeing a lot more focus in this area of health in the coming years. 
Now lets not forget to address out limbs, back and feet. Sore feet, muscle fatigue, tension, pinched and aching limb ailments have all been linked to supressed emotions. Turns out that your gut isn't the only thing storing all those bad vibes, your muscles, skin and bones do it too and it can manifest in a number of aching and annoying ways throughout your system. Skin break outs, rashes, aches, pains, stiffness, throbbing and numbness have all been linked to stress and anxiety conditions and have shown vast improvement when treated with gentle, holistic and calming treatment methods. 
Any restlessness, inability to settle or ground yourself is another way that your body sends you signals that you aren't operating at 100%. Even a simple niggle or nuisance pain can turn into something significant if it is left unattended for long enough, so long story short, never ignore the signals that your body sends to you. Listen to that twinge, notice that knot and be attentive to anything that seems odd, out of the norm or annoying within your system. And never forget one of my favourite pieces of advise; that if you listen to your body when it whispers, then you'll never have to hear it scream. So please, tune in and stay strong. 

NOPE
Release Date: 2022
Rating: MA 15+
Running Time: 130 mins 
Jordan Peele delivers a unique mix of sci-fi suspense and horror that is destined to become a cult classic with Nope. With elements of early '80s Spielberg and a big nod to classic sci-fi monster horror, Nope manages to be sharp, funny and creepy in ways that the sci-fi/ horror genre hasn't been in a very long time. 
Em and OJ Haywood have inherited their father's ranch after he is killed in a freak accident on the property. The two attempt to keep the family legacy afloat by selling horses to a nearby Western Theme Park, however, at night, strange and inexplicable things are occurring and their horses are being effected. 
This sounds like a simple story, but it really isn't. There is also a second story running along side that invokes a chimpanzee and a '90s sitcom TV program, but I really don't want to spoil anything for you. In fact the less you know the better here. I went in blind and thoroughly enjoyed the ride. 
The cast is really strong here with Keke Palmer, Daniel Kaluuya, Brandon Perea and Steven Yeun all giving terrific performances. Michael Wincott is also fabulous as the creative film-maker and Keith David rounds things out perfectly as the Haywood patriarch and ranch owner Otis Haywood. 
Teamed with excellent special effects and unnerving sound effects, Nope will stick with you and have you pondering the clouds more than you did before you saw this film. 
FINAL SAY: Yeah, nah nah nah. 
3.5 Chilli Peppers ​

Last week we welcomed a new kitten into our lives. Salem, our black eight week old kitten arrived in Enfield just ten days ago after a screaming drive home from Melbourne to relocate with us. Born from a stray cat and delivered inside of a lawn mower catcher in my brothers backyard, Salem is anything but meek and has been tearing up our home, scratching up the place and making herself more than comfortable in our now very kitten proofed home. 
I cannot deny that I seriously under-estimated how much energy kittens can have, especially since we had a geriatric cat for about a decade that did nothing but eat, snuggle and sleep. Salem does those three cat things a lot as well, but she also jumps, runs, skitters, drags,  chews, destroys, pounces, climbs, bites and scratches. And all of this is apparently very normal for a now nine week old kitten, but boy is it tiring! I am feeling a new level of fatigue that I haven't experienced since my children were toddlers. 
Kittens need a tonne of attention, that's the bottom line. And they require so much of your time, energy and commitment if they are to become well adjusted, content and loving adult pussy cats. In the last ten days alone we have had to navigate settling Salem into her new home environment, a trip to the vet for vaccinations and chipping (which made her so lethargic that I thought she was going to die) and then to add icing to the already quite stressful kitten cake, she also had a bout of explosive kitten diarrhoea which was not only messy and smelly, but truly gross and distressing.  
Has it been amazing? Yes at times, it has been extremely cute, cuddly and enjoyable. But mostly, it has been tiring, taxing, stressful and troubling. And so it should be right? We have literally introduced a wild animal into our home, what did we really expect was going to happen? Sure I had visions of tiny kitten cuddles, morning snuggles and sweet head-butting behaviours teamed with gentle but cute play, and yes we did get all of that, but we also got a tiny bundle of claws and teeth! A pint sized, furry, killing machine that appears to be hellbent on wearing us out, wrecking all of our stuff and keeping us up at night. 
The other day Seth was at home sick, really quite sick indeed and in need of some rest and recovery time.  He said that he was more than happy to do a spot of kitten sitting whilst he was resting at home. When I got home from work I asked how Salem had gone without Craig or I around. Poor Seth proceeded to explain that whilst we were out Salem had bouts of extremely high energy which involved zooming about the house, leaping off the furniture, scaling the fly wire screens, biting his feet, jumping on top of his head and attacking him on and off throughout the day. Needless to say, Seth did not get a lot of rest with all of that going on and he was also sporting some seriously welted battle scars on his stomach, arms and feet; clear evidence that Salem was indeed going bonkers and attacking him roughly. This was the point when we realised that our tiny Salem was going to be a handful and that the 'settling in to her new home' honeymoon was well and truly over!
And what do the experts say about all of this? They say that this is all very normal stuff, and we just have to stay calm and ride it out, that the kitten phase only lasts about a year so we should try to make the most of having a baby in the house. A YEAR! Wtf? I am going to look like that crazy cat lady off the Simpsons if this continues for a year! Walking around aimlessly in an unkempt state and talking gibberish to myself with a cat hanging off my back all of the time. I am praying that our little hellbender settles down a little bit sooner than that, but we will just have to do what the cat whisperer says and find our peace with it. 
When you adopt a pet you have to take it on completely. You sign up to see it through the vet visits, the bouts of explosive diarrhoea, the destruction of property and in our case the mental kitten stage! And you do that for the duration of its lifetime, no matter how it all turns out. When you become a pet owner, its a little like being a parent all over again, you don't get to tap out or check out and you have to make your peace with things going wrong from time to time. And I really cannot deny that in spite of Salem's hellbender antics, those delightful pussy cuddles, feathery soft fur pats and delightful tiny facial expressions do make every bit of the effort utterly worthwhile. 

​HELLBENDER
Release Date: 2022
Rating: R 18+
Running Time: 86 mins 
When it comes to low budget independent films, Hellbender has everything and everyone else trumped. While the rest of the world was lollygagging about during the covid-19 lockdown period, the Adams family were making this movie. And when I say making it, I mean writing, directing, filming, editing, costume designing, music composing and also acting in the lead roles. The trio - composed of John Adams, Toby Poser and Zelda Adams, collaborated on this low budget horror and the results are deeply impressive. 
A mother and her teenage daughter live a solitary life on an isolated mountain. They have their own band, they forage their own food and they appear to live a very peaceful and natural lifestyle, except for one detail. They are hellbenders, and if you want to know what that is, then you'll need to see the movie!
What Hellbender delivers may be janky in effects, but it more than makes up for that with its brilliant cinematography and gripping atmosphere. I was hooked at the 10 minute mark and I think that this little hidden gem deserves  lot more attention and applause. Toby Poser and Zelda Adams are incredibly good in front of the camera here, delivering a mother-daughter, coming of age folk tale like no other. 
FINAL SAY: Growing up is hell. 
3 Chilli Peppers ​

It's really okay to tip over, in fact it is very normal to feel tilted from time to time, especially in our current times. What I mean when I say tilted is a state of feeling, well... just a bit off really. You're not really yourself in totality if that makes sense. You aren't upset or angry or depressed,  you're just a bit tilted - left of centre, misaligned, not on target.
You may feel a little tired or you could be recovering from a recent illness. You may be trying to manage too many things at once and feel a bit torn between tasks or expectations. You aren't quite firing on all cylinders and it can be a bit annoying, concerning, confusing or perplexing when it happens. 
Generally, the tilted feeling doesn't last all that long - just a couple of days. Just long enough for us to notice that we aren't feeling like our usual selves and hopefully set about rectifying the imbalance. The tilted feeling, when I get it, is a gentle nudge from my body to say that something needs my attention. It's a gentle nudge at first and if I ignore it, it becomes something much harder to ignore.  It stops being a list and starts to become a problem. 
I don't know who coined the phrase - listen to your body when it whispers so that you don't have to hear it scream, but they were certainly on to something. This whisper that they speak of is the tilted feeling that I am speaking of; a gentle listing just to remind me that I have gone off course and am heading in a bad, troubling, unproductive or dangerous direction.
Often I experience 'tilting' when I have failed to replenish my own needs and my personal battery is beginning to run low. I feel tilted in the early days leading up to an illness, when I have done too much in too little time or I have given myself too many social interludes without any time to diffuse in between. Being an introvert, this can happen to me very easily.
My listing feeling may start like a headache or a bit of brain fog. It can be a tired feeling where I will just desperately feel like I need to be alone or withdraw. It can be an ache in my shoulders or my legs or my back that doesn't stop me from doing things but is as annoying as hell. It can present as little melancholy and low in energy and I can seem aloof, bored, disinterested or short. It's not black, it's blue; it's not dark it's slow moving and dull, like a tone running in the background. It can be ignored, but it never should be because as I said, it's whispering not yelling yet. 
Over the years I have become an expert at knowing what to do when I start to 'list' and I am very good at catching myself before I go full tilt overboard these days. Check out my top tips:
TIRED?

• Go to bed early for at least 3 days straight - duh!
• Clear the weekend, and stay home from Friday evening to Monday morning - full reboot. 
• Turn off the TV early and go read a book in bed. 
• Nap - get into the habit of napping when you can, it's awesome to nap. 
• Skip the gym/ workout for a day or two, you'll be fine!
• Meditate, it's super rejuvenating. 
• Wear peppermint essential oil. 
• Drink less coffee and eat more apples - it does work!

ACHING?

• Book a massage asap.
• Take a couple of Panadol/ Ibuprofen. 
• Have a long soak in the tub. 
• Lie down and put your feet up. 
• Splash lavender  and bergamot in your diffuser to soothe anxiety and stress. 
• Cut out the alcohol and clean eat for a few days to reset your system. 
• Make a doctors appointment if this a repeated/ persistent pain. 

OVERWHELMED WITH RESPONSIBILITY?

• Order in for a couple of days, you're too tired to cook. 
• Say no to people until you can manage more. 
• Farm the kids out for a night of peace and quiet. 
• Listen to an audio book when you are in the car to unwind and change your thought patterns after work. 
• Do what needs to be done only, fuck the rest it can wait. 
• Delegate, are you sure this is all yours to do? Are there other people who could take a bit of the load for you? 
• Reprioritise, what is more important? Your health and wellbeing are always the most important thing, so listen to your body!

I seriously suggest that you do listen to your body when it is trying to speak to you, and trust me when I say that your body is communicating with you at all times - because it is! Those little twinges, they don't stay little if you ignore them. Those aches gets tougher, the tiredness gets bigger and the feelings get stronger, so do not pretend that you can't hear those early warning signs that you are getting from your body - act swiftly and get on with your life! 

BRINGING OUT THE DEAD
Release Date: 1999
Rating: R 18+
Running Time: 121 mins 
An American psychological drama film directed by Martin Scorsese, written by Paul Schrader and based on the novel of the same name by Joe Connelly. Bringing Out The Dead is easily the most original and unique film of 1999 and with a stellar ensemble cast, there's a lot to like here. 
An exhausted Manhattan paramedic (Nicholas Cage) fights to retain his sanity under the strain of his demanding and stressful job. A double graveyard shift tests his fortitude further as things for him, and his three co-workers, continue to escalate.
Nicholas Cage is really 'bringing out his dead' here, delivering a believably strung out and exhausted paramedic as he convincingly meanders around the edges of a complete meltdown. He is incredibly well supported by Ving Rhames, John Goodman, Tom Sizemore and Patricia Arquette, and although it isn't pretty, Bringing Out The Dead is genuinely interesting and thought provoking material. 
FINAL SAY: Saving someone's life is like falling in love. The best drug in the world. 
​3.5 Chilli Peppers ​

When you are in a healthy relationship, things just seem to work. They aren't taxing, you don't have to compromise yourself or alter yourself to be accepted and appreciated and even though you may argue from time to time or occasionally traverse some troubled waters, you can generally bounce back, talk it out and move along with grace. 
Not all of our relationships in life are that good, in fact some of them can be downright toxic. Toxic relationships will test you, trial you and leave you feeling deflated and defeated and they can turn up in many different places. You could be in a toxic relationship with a partner, a sibling, a parent or even a work colleague. And these unpleasant relationships could be literally draining your resources and leaving you completely depleted.
Unfortunately, depending on the nature of the relationship, signs for toxicity can be subtle or very obvious and you may not even be noticing the red flags popping up because you are too close to the source to see what is going on. It's kind of like a 'can't see the woods for the forest' type of scenario. 
So, what are the signs to look for when it comes to identifying a toxic relationship? Well, let's get down to brass tacks and identify some things that you need to be on the lookout for. 
1. Lack of Support
Healthy relationships are supportive and caring, there is usually a desire to see others succeed so if there is competition or a lack of encouragement or care, this is cause for concern. Basically, if the time that you spend with someone no longer feels positive, if there is a lack of trust or care or if the other person is only ever worried or concerned about their own needs, then this is a red flag. 
2. Toxic Communication
If conversations are mostly filled with sarcasm, condescending tones and snide remarks then odds are the relationship is toxic. There will be a lack of kind or respectful talk and much of what is said will be delivered with contempt. You may find yourself avoiding contact with this person, avoiding their calls or doing other things just to avoid further argument or hostility. 
3. Envy or Jealousy
If you are constantly suspicious of someone's motives or have a feeling that you cannot trust someone, then you may have a toxic relationship on your hands. If someone treats you with suspicion, displays envy or jealous around your actions, choices or successes this is considered to be a serious red flag that should not be ignored. Controlling or manipulative relationships are extremely toxic and can be also become very dangerous and/ or abusive. 
4. Resentment
Healthy relationships let go and move along after problems or hiccups. Toxic relationships do not. Holding on to grudges and not letting go of things chips away at peoples ability to be intimate and trusting. Over time this gap becomes a chasm that cannot be crossed. Any relationship that nurses grievances and makes you feel unsafe to speak up is toxic. 
5. Disrespect
Any patterns of disrespect are cause for concern. Always being late, forgetting events, speaking to you poorly in front of other people, gaslighting you or saying provocative or insulting  statements are all part of a toxic relationship demographic. Consider patterns in these behaviours and how they affect your ability to have a healthy relationship with the person in question. 
6. Constant Stress
It is not normal to always fight with someone or to always have tension. Sure life happens, sometimes things do get stressful: a family member is ill, job loss, financial stresses happen, but if someone is always stressed without much reason and projecting this on to you, that is considered to be a toxic relationship trait. 
7. Ignoring Your Needs
Going along with whatever someone wants and says all the time is not healthy.  If you feel like putting forward your needs is going to trigger an argument then you have a toxic relationship on your hands. Also, if you clearly outline a need or boundary that needs to be respected and the person in question continues to ignore or disrespect that need, then is safe to say that this is a toxic one-sided relationship.
8. Walking on Eggshells 
Any relationship that laves you feeling like you are walking on eggshells is seriously toxic. if you worry about bringing up things, you feel like you'll provoke tension if you speak up and you always need to go out of your way to avoid conflict then you are in a very toxic relationship.

However, it is important to know that although many people assume that toxic relationships are doomed, this isn't always the case. The deciding factor? That both people in the relationship want to change. If only person is invested in creating healthy patterns, than there is unfortunately very little likelihood that things will get better. In order to move forward look for these positive signs that your relationship still has a chance:

• An ability to accept responsibility 
• A willingness to invest in the relationship
• An ability to shift from blame to understanding
• Openness to outside help and support

With time, patience and diligence, toxic relationships can be improved, so don't be afraid to acknowledge if you are struggling with a toxic relationship that requires further support or intervention. Make sure that what you are experiencing isn't an abusive relationship rather than a toxic one and again seek support and guidance if you feel like this may be the case. 
We aren't all blessed with high functioning, loving or supportive relationships and no-one has to tolerate being treated poorly or being disrespected. Toxic relationships are extremely hard work and can be exceptionally detrimental in the long run, so always remember your worth and the importance of healthy relationships. You deserve to have good healthy relationships, so don't settle for being treated poorly by the people who should treat you better. 

PALMER
Release Date: 2021
Rating: MA 15+
Running Time: 111 mins 
An American drama directed by Fisher Stevens, written by Cheryl Guerriero and released on Apple TV+ streaming services, Palmer delivers a simple story that offers just enough heart and honesty to not feel forced or cheesy. At it's centre, Palmer is all about people being given permission to just be themselves and it is delivered in the most touching way. 
Eddie Palmer returns to his home town after a 12 year stint in jail. Staying with his grandmother and desperate to find a job and improve his station, Palmer attempts to walk a straight line. However, in a small town, people don't forget easily and he soon finds himself involved in the problems of others, especially his problematic neighbour and her flamboyant son Sam. 
Touching is an understatement, this film is deeply moving and heartfelt. And although it isn't necessarily delivering anything new or original, what is lacks in artfulness and mastery it makes up for with good intentions and likeable characters.
Justin Timberlake proves that he can do a lot more than sing and dance by shining in his lead role as Eddie Palmer, and he is well supported by Juno Temple, June Squibb and Ryder Allen as the delightfully colourful character, Sam. 
Make sure you have a tissue at the ready, this film will get to you.
FINAL SAY: I know you're mad at me. It's okay. I'd be mad at me too. 
3 Chilli Peppers ​

Everyone in our home has now popped out the other side of our gross Covid-19 experience and we are making solid attempts to resume some normality and get back into the groove of daily life again. A little easier said than done though, because the post-Covid drag is real and you do tend to wear out easily and feel like you want to lie down a lot more than you normally would. This tendency to want to get horizontal a lot more than you typically would is, as you would imagine, really inconvenient and not very conducive to getting shit done. This has proven to be really annoying for me because I generally like to burn the candle at both ends and get a lot of bang for my buck when it comes to my everyday routine. 
​Unfortunately, my post-covid body doesn't really seem to like 5.30am yoga and it certainly doesn't seem to like much of anything after 9.30pm in the evenings except sleeping.  It also seems highly reluctant about doing 10,000 steps a day and it isn't nearly as invested in meal preparation as it was pre-covid, which has made dinner, lunch and breakfast periods feel like their own form of fresh hell three times a day as I try to navigate even the simplest of tasks in the kitchen with a heady mixture of disinterest and exhaustion.
As a consequence, our meals have been basic at best, my fitness has dropped off and I am not beating the alarm with anything except my fist in the mornings at the moment. And it's fine, I know that this level of reduced energy is to be expected and is completely normal but I am quite impatient and I have found the frailties, fragilities and failings of my body genuinely frustrating. 
According to Tania Mucci-Elliot, a doctor and expert on infectious diseases, the reason that we feel so fatigued during and after Covid-19 is because our immune system goes into overdrive, releasing chemicals called cytokines that trigger inflammation, fever and tissue death. Covid-19 is a systemic illness and affects many parts of the body, such as the respiratory mucosa, the kidneys, the fat cells and even parts of the brain. After this type of stress response, your body needs to go into rest-and-recovery mode, which causes the severe post-covid fatigue that people complain about.
Basically it's like your body has just run a marathon and it needs to reset. Signs of fatigue and tiredness is the way that your body prompts you to rest and take a break and you need to respond by putting up your feet. So doctors are recommending lots of rest, lots of water to flush your system out and being super vigilant about leaving things that aren't a priority for the first few weeks after infection and just getting the important stuff done. 
Easier said then done for someone like me who usually likes to race about like a rocket, but I really don't have a lot of choice, my body isn't wiling to allow me to go much faster than a snail at the moment anyway, so feet up and chilling out as much as I can is what the doctor is ordering and who am I am to argue with the experts? 

ROCKETMAN 
Release Date: 2019
Rating: MA 15+ 
Running Time: 121 mins 
A musical biography film directed by Dexter Fletcher and written by Lee Hall and based on the life of singer/ songwriter Elton John. Rocketman received huge critical acclaim and a number of awards largely due to Taron Egerton's incredible portrayal of John, but also for the unique and creative use of music, costume design and engaging choreography. 
At an addiction rehabilitation session, Elton John recounts the events of his life from childhood to present day. Through a series of musical numbers Elton recalls his troubling childhood, his rise to fame, his struggles with addiction, his relationship to best friend Bernie Taupin and his often traumatic love life. 
​Taron Egerton is dynamite as Elton John, delivering a powerhouse and mesmerising performance. The entire film feels fresh and original in structure and delivery, which is why I felt like it was more art house than drama, but to be clear there is plenty of drama going on here. The music is hypnotically good and it was almost impossible to not sing along with some of the numbers as I watched.
Like all good musical tributes you're left with a sense of just how much great music Elton John has delivered to the world. However I also found this film quite sad because it so clearly highlights how no amount of fame or money can ever fill some very deep holes that some performers seem to harbour inside of themselves, and Elton John's story certain demonstrates that. 
​FINAL SAY: You've got to kill the person you were born to be in order to become the person you want to be. 
​3.5 Chilli Peppers ​

On 28th January 2020 the first case of the Covid-19 pandemic arrived in Australia. And for over two years I have been blogging on and off about it. I've written about lockdowns, vaccinations, self care and mental wellness around the pandemic and although it had touched many around me, I had been fortunate enough to avoid contracting it myself. 
Well, on March 9th 2022 that all ended when that crusty bastard known as the Omicron variant finally made it's way all the way out to bum fuck nowhere (aka Enfield) to track me down, slap me down and steal my lunch money.
Poor Seth was the first to succumb to it, then I contracted it four days later and then just when Craig thought he was going to have a little freedom from his close contact isolation, he got it on day seven of exposure. Yep, we all got a go around, aren't we lucky? Thank goodness that we have all had three vaccination boosters, which meant that our symptoms were mostly moderate and thankfully also short lived. The middle two days were definitely the hardest, which for me coincided with my birthday which made it all the more painful to be honest. I mean no-one wants Covid-19, but they especially do not want it on their birthday; talk about a Debbie downer event. 
I became a proper Moaning Myrtle for a few days there. I felt tired, achy, melancholy and when I wasn't burning up, I was shaking with the chills. It was the pits! Seth was still in recovery himself, Craig was working from home so he was busy which meant that I was pretty much left to my own whiny devises for a few days, getting sadder and sicker by the hour. It was so gross and yuck! Worst still was my complete inability to move around a lot because it hurt to do that and my complete brain fog that prohibited me from being able to focus on any one thing for more than 5 minutes at a time. 
I couldn't go for a walk, or do yoga, or watch a movie, or read, or draw, or hold a conversation and I certainly could not complete even the most basic of tasks like cooking or cleaning (even myself - what a pong dog!). It was hard, and so many people were calling me for my birthday and making a genuine effort to be delightful for me and I was just like...what?...huh?...I can't focus right now....I need to lie down. And of course all of the cool plans that I had to go out for dinner on my birthday and the trip to Melbourne to see Moulin Rogue that I had planned were all kaput! Everything gone up in a big puff of covid-fuck-you -smoke! So, yep, I got low for a couple of days. I got run over by a bus, rag dolled down the side of a mountain and lay there at the bottom having a big fricken sook for a couple days and feeling desperately sorry for myself. 
Not my best days, I am willing to acknowledge that. And then on day four I thought, yeah fuck this shit, I am not doing this shit anymore. And I got up, got showered and pulled my shit together because I haven't come this far to only come this far. I haven't worked my ass off on myself, on my wellbeing and my zen to let some pandemic come and take me down. So I said no to all of my whiny first world bullshit problems and did a big turn around, I looked for the positives:
1. I am not going to die (big fricken plus right there)
2. I have people here to keep an eye on me
3. I have loads of people offering me support and love  
4. I am isolating in lovely Enfield where the birds are singing and the green is on fleek
5. I have more than a week off work mid-term 
6. I can watch crappy reality TV because I have good streaming services
7. I have plenty of food, toilet paper, clean water and cosy/comfortable places to rest 
8. I am over the worst of it and I am doing fine
9. Nothing is lost, it's just on pause 
10. There will be other birthdays...lots more of them. 
And then boom, a shift in my mindset occurred and I dusted myself off and realised that although painful, sometimes 'going wrong' can actually be a deeply cathartic experience. There's nothing like a little comedown to make you appreciate your usual health, vitality and capabilities so much more. As I said in my last post, I had been living my best life this year, going out every weekend and having a lot of wonderful and fulfilling experiences, and every intelligent person knows that if you eat high on the hog every damn day then eventually you'll get sick. It was just our turn, it happens to us all, it was a setback and nothing more than that. The fact that I can even have Covid19 and still find a silver lining makes me a pretty lucky person in my eyes, I got this. 

RON'S GONE WRONG
Release Date: 2021
Rating: PG -13
Running Time: 107 mins 
A computer animated, science fiction/ comedy film directed by Sarah Smith and Jean- Phillipe Vine. This is the first animation feature film from Locksmith Animation and TSG Entertainment; and a mighty fine effort in my opinion. 
A tech giant known as 'Bubble' has created the B-Bot. A robot companion that is designed to help children to make friends. Pretty soon everyone has one, except for Barney, a struggling social outcast who is desperate to fit in.  Barney believes that everything is finally going to change for him when he gets a B-Bot for his 12th birthday. However,  unbeknownst to him, his B-bot called Ron has been damaged, making it unlike any of the other bots on the market. 
This is some seriously funny material, I was laughing out loud a lot of the time. The voice actors, who delivered their material remotely due to the Covid-19 pandemic are all genuinely terrific, especially Zac Galifianakis who brilliantly voices Ron and pretty much steals the entire show. However strong performances must also be acknowledged from Jack Dylan Grazer, Ed Helms and Olivia Colman. 
​Aside from all of the humour, there is also a super strong message here about friendship, acceptance, understanding and the gross misuse of social media platforms by young people today that I think that many children would benefit from hearing. 
Overall, Ron's Gone Wrong is a  hidden gem that you may have overlook amidst the giants of 2021, but it is definitely worthy of your time. 
FINAL SAY: A bird has commented on your face. 
3.5 Chilli Peppers ​

So, I have happily been living my best life. Doing lots of things, getting out amongst the people and having a bloody lovely time. Dinner with friends, a big live music event, an athletics event, a day at the spa and woohoo, with my birthday coming up I was getting pumped for a few nights out, a long weekend (which always occurs around my birthday) and a visit to Melbourne to see Moulin Rogue. 
And then on Saturday poor Seth tested positive to covid-19 and everything had to come to a grinding halt and we were all thrown into seven days of isolation. Oh well, no point crying over spilt milk as they say. Such is life - c'est la vie! Things happen and I have clearly had a very good run over the last couple of months so I have nothing to complain about, and besides as yet (fingers crossed it stays this way) Craig and I have both been testing negative so far; so as long as I don't contract the virus myself over the next four days, I could still make it to Moulin Rogue and all will not be lost. 
​This is the first time that Craig has had to work from home and it's a whole new world for him. Finally, he is getting to see that not being on site is far from ideal and that things are actually ten times harder and twice as annoying to co-ordinate from a distance. Also, I am not sure how I am going to put up with his crazy antics for the next week because, although he is amusing himself around here being loud and a boisterous, he is actually annoying the shit out of Seth and I  who just want to chill out, rest and watch movies.
I don't have to work from home this week, because I really can't, so I have taken the week as sick leave. So I just want to enjoy the down time to be honest. However, it's a bit hard to do that when you've got a bear sized man meandering about the house shouting out random things, talking to himself about work and just generally poking everyone in the ribs because he can't manage being locked up at home and it's only Monday for fuck sake! 
God only knows what state we all be in by Friday if he doesn't manage to calm his farm a bit. Because although a week of no work and relaxation sounds like heaven, it is anything but when you have to be locked in with someone who is not coping well with the situation and cannot read the room and gauge their actions based on the people around them. 
This could actually be a very long week....

BO BURNHAM: INSIDE 
Release Date: 2021
Rating: MA 15+
Running Time: 87 mins 
Written, directed, filmed, edited and performed by comedian Bo Burnham during the Covid-19 pandemic lockdown of 2020, this unique film is a collection of Burnham's songs and skits in response to his deteriorating mental health and the world's obsession with social media during isolation and enforced lockdowns. 
This entire film feels deeply personal, and that's because it is. We literally get an intimate glimpse inside the head of Bo Burnham, delivered through original music, stand up comedy and meta-commentary. What Burnham manages to do in 87 minutes is take his audience on a ride, delivering something that feels so fresh and genuine that you can't look away.
It's a little bit theatrical, quite heavy on the sarcasm, with a smattering of dark humour and some beautifully bleak and honest storytelling about the social and emotional effects of isolation, in a word it's riveting!
Critics lauded the special's presentation of the Covid-19 pandemic, which he never actually mentions by name at any stage during the film, and he became the first person to win three Emmy's individually in a single year after he took the directing, writing and music direction awards in 2021. 
Bo Burnham: Inside was definitely my favourite comedy of 2021 and it shouldn't be missed.
FINAL SAY: White woman's Instagram!
​4 Chilli Peppers ​

Sadly, because the Hollywood Foreign Press Association was mired in racial controversy, The Golden Globes annual event was completely devoid of all stars and all cameras this year. Which also meant that it couldn't be televised - I mean, not a lot of point televising an awards ceremony if the stars aren't even going to be there right? So, for the first time in years, I didn't get to enjoy the glitz and glamour of it all from the comfort of my couch with a champers in my hand, I just had to wait to hear the results like everyone else did - via the media. 
It’s was a unfortunate downgrade of what used to be one of the glitziest awards shows in Hollywood. But after investigations by The Los Angeles Times and New York Times revealed a series of ethical lapses within the H.F.P.A. and a membership devoid of Black voters, Hollywood’s major publicity firms cut off the show’s access to stars. How on earth this has happened in this day and age seriously perplexes me, but at least the scandal has been brought out into the light for rectification. 
Naturally, the H.F.P.A. has since announced its new rules and has now admitted 21 new members, including journalists of colour; which is better late than never I suppose, but its pretty damn hard to make amends now.
And it still remains to be seen if Hollywood will even acknowledge Sunday’s awards ceremony, which is a genuine shame for the recipients, because in my opinion they were all most deserving of their wins. 
Below is the complete list of winners. 
Best Motion Picture, Drama
“The Power of the Dog”
Best Motion Picture, Musical or Comedy
“West Side Story”
Best Director, Motion Picture
Jane Campion, “The Power of the Dog”
Best Performance by an Actress in a Motion Picture, Drama
Nicole Kidman, “Being the Ricardos”
Best Performance by an Actress in a Motion Picture, Musical or Comedy
Rachel Zegler, “West Side Story”
Best Performance by an Actress in a Supporting Role in Any Motion Picture
Ariana DeBose, “West Side Story”
Best Performance by an Actor in a Motion Picture, Drama
Will Smith, “King Richard”
Best Performance by an Actor in a Motion Picture, Musical or Comedy
Andrew Garfield, “Tick, Tick … Boom!”
Best Performance by an Actor in a Supporting Role in any Motion Picture
Kodi Smit-McPhee, “The Power of the Dog”
Best Screenplay, Motion Picture
Kenneth Branagh, “Belfast”
Best Original Score, Motion Picture
Hans Zimmer, “Dune”
Best Original Song, Motion Picture
Billie Eilish, “No Time to Die”
Best Motion Picture, Animated
“Encanto”
Best Motion Picture, Non-English Language
“Drive My Car”
Best Television Series, Drama
“Succession”
Best Television Series, Musical or Comedy
“Hacks”
Best Limited Series, Anthology Series or a Motion Picture Made for Television
“The Underground Railroad”
Best Performance by an Actress in a Television Series, Drama
Michaela Jaé Rodriguez, “Pose”
Best Performance by an Actor in a Television Series, Drama
Jeremy Strong, “Succession”
Best Performance by an Actress in a Television Series, Musical or Comedy
Jean Smart, “Hacks”
Best Performance by an Actress in a Limited Series, Anthology Series or a Motion Picture Made for Television
Kate Winslet, “Mare of Easttown”
Best Performance by an Actress in a Television Supporting Role
Sarah Snook, “Succession”
Best Performance by an Actor in a Television Series, Musical or Comedy
Jason Sudeikis, “Ted Lasso”
Best Performance by an Actor in a Limited Series or a Motion Picture Made for Television
Michael Keaton, “Dopesick”
Best Performance by an Actor in a Television Supporting Role
O Yeong-su, “Squid Game”

THE POWER OF THE DOG
Release Date: 2021
Rating: M
Running Time: 126 mins 
An intelligent and genuinely intriguing film; written, produced and directed by Jane Campion, The Power of the Dog is mesmerising and disturbing in equal measures. With marvellous sweeping landscapes and enough sideways glances to make anyone uncomfortable, its hard to look away from the screen whilst you are watching this. After winning the Best Motion Picture - Drama at the 79th Golden Globe Awards, The Power of Dog swiftly gained attention and became the buzz film of early 2022.
The Burbank brothers are wealthy ranchers from Montana. One is a mild mannered gentleman named George and the other is a severe and intimidating cowboy named Phil. When George falls for a widow named Rose and brings her and her impressionable son Peter to their ranch to live, tensions rise as Phil attempts to assert himself over the newcomers. 
This is a slow burning western drama, so it isn't going to appeal to everyone, but it certainly appealed to me.  The cast is unbelievably good here, with Benedict Cumberbatch, Kirsten Dunst and Jesse Plemons delivering their finest, but it was young Kodi Smit-McPhee that stole the show here with his  unassuming observations and contemplative behaviours as Rose's son Peter that really engrossed me. 
I loved this film from start to end, it explores the hardest of the hard and also the tenderest of souls, which is a contrast that I am always drawn to, and just like all of Jane Campion's efforts, this was a total winner for me.  
FINAL SAY: Deliver my soul from the sword. My darling from the power of the dog. 
5 Chilli Peppers ​

I'm not sure what the hell is going on with me at the moment. It could be a side effect of lockdown, it could be that I am tired of feeling like an irrelevant shit kicker and it might be none of those things at all. Maybe it is just the season of the witch - who knows really? Whatever is going on, I have become absolutely incapable of putting up with being treated disrespectfully.  
Maybe when you get to my age you start to think that it is high time to throw caution to the wind and be honest about how you feel. Now I do realise that in becoming especially vocal about your needs and wants (particularly when you are a female of a certain of age) that you can present yourself as a menopausal, troublesome, problematic bitch. And to be honest I am also okay with that as well because how other people choose to perceive me is actually way more about them than it is about me anyway, and I can honestly say that I am not calling anyone out on anything that I wouldn't be comfortable to be called out on myself. 
What I have been doing is setting some pretty clear boundaries around what I am comfortable with, what I will not tolerate and how would prefer to be spoken to. I do this without any malice or entitlement or intent to harm others. I do this because it is something that I believe that everyone should be doing and it is something that I need to do for myself in order to feel self empowered and clearly interpreted.  If anyone should take this as me being a tenacious bitch to them, well that is unfortunate for them.
You see what I have learned from all the lockdowns and the general 'pandemic-stricken' state of the world is that people are really not very concerned with anyone else's lot in life, not genuinely anyway. They will say that they are and they will ask all the right questions but when push comes to shove, rarely do people actually have your back or best interests at the forefront of their thinking. They are far too occupied with their own lot in life and I am totally okay with that - it's fine and reasonable and I have no ill feelings around any of that. But what it does mean is that if you aren't willing to stand up for your own welfare you will get overlooked, mistreated and disrespected. 
Now this kind of treatment is not happening because people set out to treat you like a piece of shit, it just happens because people are so busy in their own affairs that they don't realise that they are treating you like a piece of shit. I get that, I know that I have unintentionally been shitty to people myself because I have gotten pre-occupied in my own dramas and dilemmas. And hey, if a pandemic is not a good enough reason to get caught up in your own shit, then what is right? 
I understand why it happens and I get why it happens, but I also know without a shadow of doubt that if you don't stand up for yourself and put some boundaries in place around the way that people can treat you, then you will be setting yourself up for more bullshit as things progress. Please sir may I have another? No, no, no - don't mind my shattered feelings in any of this or consider my personal hardships, you just keep on wiping your dirty hands on my back as you roll on by.  I got this!
Well, sorry I don't got this! None of has got this! And I am tired of all the bullshit! I am so tired of people going off half cocked and treating people like they don't matter or aren't important. WE ARE ALL IN THIS SHITTY PANDEMIC! All of us, and we all have our own personal struggles and challenges to face being in the world right now.  If the only kindness that you can deliver right now is to yourself then do that, just don't treat everyone around you like a piece of shit in the process. 
Can't say anything nice? Then don't say anything at all! Don't like how things are going? Try telling someone who can actually do something about it instead of whinging and being sour all the time. Need some help? Fucking ask for some then! This will all go along a heck of a lot easier if people would just own their shit, set some boundaries and be a bit frickin' nicer all around. Yes, I know I am being short and blunt and yes, you can call me tenacious B if that feels right for you, but please, I implore you, try a little tenderness! Show some respect and decency to your fellow humankind.
​It's really not that difficult. 

BURNING
Release Date: 2018
Rating: MA 15+ 
Running Time: 158 mins 
A Korean psychological thriller co-written, co- produced and directed by Lee Chang-dong. Based on the short story "Barn Burning" by Haruki Murakami, this movie subtly twists and turns around itself, winding faster and faster all the way to the end of the film, delivering one of the most riveting and ambiguous narratives that I have seen in very long time. 
Jong-su falls for his childhood friend Hae-mi and the two start an intimate relationship. Hae-mi leaves for Africa and asks Jong-su to care for her mysteriously elusive cat in her absence. When Hae-mi returns she has a new man in her life, a wealthy and unusual character called Ben. 
If you are looking for some contemplation, then look no further because Burning provides ponderous interludes in bucket loads. The cast are amazing, with Ah-In Yoo and Jong-seo Jun delivering equally strong and captivating performances, however it was Steven Yeun's eerie portrayal of Ben that had me most intrigued.
You may have some unfulfilled questions when the film reaches its end, depending on how you interpret the material; or like me, you might feel like it all came together perfectly. And I think that is actually the biggest charm of this film - its just so open to interpretation. 
FINAL SAY: They are called the great hungry. 
3.5 Chilli Peppers ​

As we approach lockdown 7.0 in rural Victoria (yep we had a 6.0 lockdown that I failed to even mention on my blog because it was only for 4 days) it is time to muster up some strength and fortitude from the already dry wells of our tired and weary souls. And what I have learned about myself and others from all of these lockdowns is that we are all a lot more physically, mentally and emotionally stronger than we allow ourselves to think that we are. And when our personal wells appear to have run dry, they may not have actually run as dry as you may have first thought. 
When it comes to physical endurance and strength, no-one does it better than elite athletes. They understand that there is a very clear relationship between one's mind and one's ability to keep on going even when your body has grown extremely fatigued. A fascinating study was conducted around this by researchers at Northumbria University in England. They got a number of cyclists to pedal as fast as they could on stationary bikes for a couple of miles and encouraged them to go as hard as they could. 
They then split the group into two separate groups. Both groups were then sat in front of a computer screen on stationary bikes and were told that they would be racing against the cyclist on the screen. The first group were told that the cyclist on the screen was travelling at their previously best time but it was actually performing 2% faster than their best time. And the second group were told that the rider was 2% faster than their previous best. And guess who did better? The first group did better and matched the 2% faster rider where as the second group only matched their previously best rides and failed to keep up with the avatar because they had already perceived the bar to be too high before they started. 
So what is going on in this study? Well, while an athlete certainly does need to consider their muscles, heart and lungs when it comes to their physical endurance it would also appear that they need to consider their mind set  as well before they go into a race or competition. Mind plays a very crucial role in the way that our bodies will perform and what we allow ourselves to believe that we can endure. In short, our brain is lazy and by saying things like "I can't do this anymore" or "I'm done" or "I need to tap out" we offer ourselves an exit and sometimes our brain goes there sooner than we really need to. 
And just as our brains can tell us that we are too tuckered out to complete physical tasks, it can also do the same with mental tasks and emotional tasks, tapping us out way sooner than we need to. Our brains allow us to perceive things to be bad before they even really are, and this is often the case with repeated lockdowns.  Thoughts like 'I hated it last time' or 'this will last forever' or 'I just can't go another round' often lead us into unnecessary prediction cycles where we are catastrophising and panicking about things that may not even occur. If history has taught us anything, it's that things are transient and changeable, so assuming that it will  be the same all over again is not only unrealistic but it's also feeding our brains the wrong message. 
Now in all fairness to our brains, it is lazy and anxious for a reason, it's harking back to a basic and outdated survival program that we all have inside of us that would've kept us alive once upon a time, but those times have changed and now that mode just wears us out and makes us feel stressed out.  So you have to bypass and dig deep so that you can gain access to those well guarded reserves of strength that you have hidden within you. 
The first step in doing this is to call your brains bluff. When it starts to read out a negative script shut the thought down immediately and replace it with a positive mantra like "I am strong" or "I can do this." Studies have proven that the efficacy of motivational self talk will not only make uncomfortable or challenging tasks less difficult but it will also give you more vigour to complete them in a more efficient and accurate way.
I do understand that emotional challenges are a little more difficult to overcome and often a lot more complicated and telling yourself to buck up when you're feeling depressed isn't exactly going to make your well-spring flood over with fortitude. However, from personal experience, if you are feeling like that, the best place to start is to share your experience with someone who may have already been through something similar to you and come out the other side of it. People who have overcome their own well drying up and been able to replenish it will usually have a wealth of knowledge to share and can be a wonderful bolster during challenging times like these. So don't be afraid to share the load with others and be willing to be transparent about the way that you are feeling. 
Above all else, never forget that this too shall pass and whether you are feeling physically, mentally or emotionally drained about the prospect of yet another lockdown and you feel like you just can't go on, well don't believe that lie, tell that lie to go and fuck off! Dig deeper into your well and you'll be surprised what you may find in reserve down there. You are stronger than you think that you are! 

FORD V FERRARI
Release Date: 2019 
Rating: M 
Running Time: 152 mins 
Unlike many other American sports films, you don't actually need to be invested in the sport to get a lot out of this film. And I know this first hand because I know absolutely nothing about car racing and yet I still thoroughly enjoyed this movie because it is just as much about the dynamic personalities as it is about racing.  Directed by James Mangold and written by Jez Butterworth, Ford v Ferrari received worldwide critical acclaim and appraise and was even nominated for Best Picture at the 92nd Academy Awards. 
In 1963, Enzo Ferrari personally insults Henry Ford's heir - the owner of the Ford Motor Company. In retaliation, a furious Ford Jnr decides to create his own racing division with plans to beat Ferrari at Le Mans. In order to this, they hire former Le Mans winner Carroll Shelby to head the task, who in turn enlists Ken Miles, a hot headed Brit to assist him. 
At 2.5 hours running time you would expect that this film would get boring for anyone that isn't interested in car racing, but nothing could be further from the truth. This is a genuinely interesting real life tale that is delivered perfectly by Matt Damon who plays Shelby and Christian Bale who portrays Miles. The onscreen friendship here is delightful to watch and both actors are bringing their charisma and energy to this movie in buckets, making it a genuinely engrossing and enjoyable watch. 
FINAL SAY: You're gonna build a car to beat Ferrari with....a Ford? 
3.5 Chilli Peppers ​

Anxiety disorders are no joke, they are real and they can have some very serious medical side effects. Just as serious as heart disease or diabetes in fact and anxiety disorders are now the most common and pervasive mental disorders that we are seeing around the world. The term 'anxiety disorder' refers to specific psychiatric disorders that involve extreme fear or worry and they can range from general to moderate anxieties to serious phobias, disorders and panic attacks. 
Panic attacks occur when a person with anxiety finds it difficult to control their worry and they suffer from an intense fear or discomfort that reaches a peak within minutes. This level of anxiety affects millions of people across the globe and women are more than twice as likely to be affected. Panic attacks can build up gradually over a long period of time and then strike with great force out of the blue, which makes them even more upsetting when they do occur. 
Generally, if you are having a panic attack you will present with at least four of these symptoms at one time:

• Palpitations, pounding heart or an accelerated heart rate.
• Sweating.
• Trembling or shaking.
• Sensations of shortness of breath or smothering.
• Feeling like you are choking.
• Chest pains or discomfort. 
• Nausea or abdominal distress.
• ​Feeling dizzy, unsteady, light-headed or faint.
• Chills or heat sensations.
• Paraesthesia.
• Derealization or depersonalization. 
• Fear of losing control or going crazy.
• Fear of dying. 

Although anxiety is often accompanied by physical symptoms, such as racing heart or knots in the stomach, what differentiates a panic attack from other anxiety symptoms is the intensity and the duration of the symptoms. Panic attacks typically reach their peak level in 10 minutes or less and then begin to subside. Due to the intensity of the symptoms and their tendency to mimic those of heart disease, thyroid problems, breathing disorders and other significant illnesses, people with panic disorders often make several visits to emergency rooms or the doctors convinced that they have life threatening illnesses. 
Panic attacks are extremely unpleasant and can be frightening for sufferers. As a result, people who experience them repeatedly often become worried about having another one and this can increase anxiety even further.  But fear not because help is at hand. If you think that you may be suffering from panic attacks or any other form of anxiety that is making your life a challenge you can start by checking out this website. You will find a self test check in, some excellent self help resources and information and some links to get further support if you think that you may need it. 
We live in challenging times and anxiety is definitely on the rise. If you are concerned, then please do reach out for support, nobody should suffer from anxiety alone. 

NOBODY
Release Date: 2021 
Rating: MA 15+
Running Time: 92 mins 
An American action thriller directed by Ilya Naishuller and written by Derek Kolstad that delivers a short, sharp, action packed punch to the senses. It may not be breaking any new ground when it comes to storyline but it does deliver an enjoyable, violent romp that is strengthened greatly by Bob Odenkirk's fabulous delivery. 
When seemingly average family man Hutch Mansell's house is broken to by a couple of armed thugs, he is happy to let them leave peacefully to preserve the wellbeing of his family. However, what the thieves don't know, is who Hutch Mansell really is and how their actions have now ignited a violent chain of events that no-one could have predicted. 
The cast throughout is solid, with Connie Nielsen, Christopher Lloyd and Michael Ironside all delivering strong supports but this film is 100% Bob Odenkirk's and he plays Hutch Mansell with such a calm, cool disposition that he gives John Wick a run for his money. I had a lot of fun watching this, its fast and its amusing and it is just the right length for an action thriller. 
FINAL SAY: Give me the goddamn kitty cat bracelet, motherfucker!
3.5 Chilli Peppers ​

We didn't even manage to get a full week in to the new school term before old Dan Andrews slapped another round of lockdown on us poor Victorians. Lockdown 5.0 is what everyone is calling this one and with numbers escalating around the country at a rapid and scary rate, lord only know how long this one will last for?
To be honest, I am not really an anxious person and after this many lockdowns I'm kind of like, yep bring it on. Or as Vicky Pollard from Little Britain would be saying at this stage 'I'm not bothered' about it at all.  If locking down is what we need to do then let's just do it and get it done. 
This latest lockdown was the result of two furniture removal guys travelling from Sydney to South Australia and having a lovely little stop off in Victoria and smearing their COVID19 hands across the state on the way. And there was also a family who broke border restrictions and came down to us from Sydney and brought with them...yep you guessed it - COVID19, the Delta Strain. Bless their hearts right? And that's all it takes, a couple of people not complying and boom - we are back to where we started all over again.
​However, for the first time ever it's not Victoria being blamed for another outbreak, it's poor NSW who is copping it royally this time, with numbers in the hundreds every day and rising. We as Victorians know exactly how this feels and it is just awful and tremendously scary. And naming and shaming the culprits who delivered a fresh batch of hell back to our doorsteps doesn't really change the fact that COVID19 is back in our lives and lockdown again we must. 
​Last year Victoria saw 820 deaths from COVID19 and we were in lockdown for almost four months and in that time we saw over 7,000 people become infected, it was not fun and Victorians remember that horror show and are more than happy to lockdown and do whatever it takes to stop that happening again.  We are bloody lockdown experts now!
Since the first confirmed case of the virus was detected in Australia in January of 2020 we have had 31,771 cases and 914 deaths to date. Which may not seem like many when compared to other parts of world but we certainly don't want any more deaths. Across the globe there have now been 190 million cases and 4.08 million deaths with the worst effected countries being the United State, India, Brazil, Russia and France. The United States alone has had 34 million cases and 608 thousand deaths, which is just mind boggling but there is the true power of Trump leadership for you, a total shit stain on the history of America forever. That country will take generations to recover from the impact of COVID19 and his bullshit leadership.
So, when we compare ourselves to the rest of the world we aren't doing so bad but we don't want to gain credit for having less infections, we just want to look after our fellow citizens and our own wellbeing. Locking down costs money, I get it but the cost of lives is far greater than any amount of money. Every economy across the world is being hit hard by COVID19 but it is only by putting people first that we can defeat this relentless and highly adaptable virus. 
So we forge forward into the great unknown lockdown predicament of 'Lockdown 5.0', not knowing how long it will last or how far it will spread but knowing that we have nothing to fear if we just do the right thing and stay home for as long as it takes. Thank god for streaming services right now that's all I'm going to say. 

FEAR STREET TRILOGY:
Part One - 1994
Part Two - 1978
Part Three - 1666
Release Date: 2021
Rating: MA 15+
Running Time: 330 mins total 
Based on the Fear Street books written by R.L. Stine, this horror trilogy  directed by Leigh Janiak hits some high notes with its ode to old school horror slasher films. There are Easter eggs galore for fans of retro horror and the storyline that ties the trilogy together is pretty intriguing and generally well executed. 
Welcome to Shadyside, a town that has been plagued with a string of grisly murders for centuries. A group of teenagers accidently unearth and awaken an ancient evil, something powerful that has been buried deep but can no longer remain hidden. The teens unwittingly become involved in uncovering a truth that will change the town forever. 
Is this a perfect formula? Of course not, it's a slasher trilogy, but on that front it does deliver. With a mixture of A Nightmare on Elm Street, Friday the 13th, Halloween and The Witch all rolled into one, Fear Street brings something known but also missing from our screens since the early 90's and I had a lot of fun watching these with my teenage son.
​The cast is a likeable mix of fresh faced 'not so teenage' teens (would we expect anything else from a slasher trilogy?) and the soundtracks for all three films are honestly, completely awesome!
Released by Netflix over the course of three weeks, the Fear Street trilogy is a fun horror romp that doesn't fail to satisfy. 
FINAL SAY: Before the witch's final breath, she found a way to cheat her death. By cutting off her cursed hand, she kept her grip upon our land. 
3.5 Chilli Peppers ​

Everyone has stress in their life from time to time. Some amounts of stress can be good for us, it keeps us alert, aware and on track, but too much stress can have incredibly damaging and long lasting effects on your health and wellbeing. The severity and length that you feel stressed for will depend a lot upon your ability to recognise and acknowledge your symptoms of stress before they can become too big to manage alone. 
Stress can rear it ugly head through many different physical, mental, social or emotional avenues and it will usually begin with a trigger or incident that forces your stress response to kick in.  This is commonly known as the Alarm Reaction Stage. 
The Alarm Reaction Stage refers to the initial symptoms that your body will experience when it is under stress and what you will do on auto-pilot to combat this. You may be familiar with the 'F' responses that people generally engage during the Alarm Reaction Stage. For those of you that aren't familiar with your 'F' responses they usually fit into one of these categories:
Fight - Attacking, confronting, dominating. Being angry and irritable and using insult, blame and the mistreatment of others to deal with stress. 
Flight - Run, hide, quit. Being in denial and anxious and using evasion, sabotage and purposeful rejection to deal with your stress. 
Freeze - Comply, surrender, shutdown. Being numb or empty and using detachment, rationalizing and justification to deal with your stress. 
Face - Challenge and analyse. Being calm and grounded. Using alert, aware and decisive action to deal with your stress. 
Sometimes we may use one or more of these responses when we feel stressed and that is also completely normal. Your body does these things because it is trying to keep you safe. You feel stressed, you feel anxious and your body will kick everything up a notch to keep you out of harms way. Generally before you arrive at the Face response, you will first arrive at the Resistance Stage which comes right after the Alarm Reaction Stage. 
In the Resistance Stage, after the initial shock of a stressful event and your 'F' response, your body will begin to attempt to repair itself.  It will release a lower amount of cortisol and your heart rate and blood pressure will normalize. Although your body will be in recovery, you will still be functioning on high alert. If the stressful situation diminishes your body will continue to heal itself until you are back to normal. However, if stress continues in this phase your body will attempt to learn to live with higher levels of stress and will go through changes that you're unaware of, in attempt to cope. Your body will continue to secrete the stress hormone and your blood pressure will remain elevated. You will feel irritable, frustrated and will struggle to concentrate on things. After a while you will enter the third stage of stress response - The Exhaustion Stage. 
The Exhaustion Stage is the result of prolonged or chronic stress. You will feel drained physically, emotionally and mentally to the point where your body no longer has the strength to engage your 'F' responses. You will suffer complete hopelessness and display fatigue, burnout, depression, high anxiety and an overall decreased ability to deal with even the smallest amounts of stress. Your immune system will be weakened and you'll be more prone to illness, serious diseases and ailments. 
So.... Clearly we need to have the resources and skills to be able to engage our Face 'F' response early on when dealing with a stressful scenario in order to minimise the impact to our health and wellbeing. And although it's not possible to eliminate all stress from our lives, there are things that we can do to minimise the impact that stress can have on us. 
I believe that it's vital that everyone has a sound tool kit of ways to deal with their stress, and that is going to look a little different for everyone.  Acknowledging, recognising and regularly evaluating your stress levels is a key way to ensure that you are managing your stresses before they get too large. If you do suffer from stress indicators, then it's vital that you give yourself adequate time to repair and recover during the Resistance Stage before you enter the Exhaustion Stage. 
Look at what is causing the stress that you have in your life and evaluate your need to continue with this event or action. What can you do to change things for the better? If you find that you cannot eliminate your stress then you will need to investigate methods of stress management with a health care professional which may include exercise, medication, diet, meditation and deep breathing exercises. But, whatever you do don't give up on your attempts to improve your responses to stress and do not let stress rule your life. Remember that some stress is normal but too much is not and you don't want to be a slave to your stress responses. 

Sometimes things don't turn out the way that we hoped they would.  And one of the hardest things to accept in this life (for me) is disappointment. Usually when things or people disappoint me I get quite depressed about it and then end up feeling disappointed in myself. It's a vicious cycle that I have identified within myself and every time that I go through this, it leaves me feeling extremely flat and drained. 
Unfortunately, this week I have arrived at this station. It's not a station that I have arrived at over the last year or so because I have made so many consistent and valiant efforts to prioritise my own wellbeing and mental wellness, so I am actually really disappointed to find myself here again. However, in spite of all of my hard work to remain positive and mindful since I had my operation this time last year, my wellspring of positivity has run dry for the first time. 
It actually pains me to say this, but I feel as though I have completely run dry. I feel tired and overwhelmed and teary. I feel let down by the people around me. I feel taken for granted and stretched out. I feel alone, despondent and lost. And most of all I feel really, really angry at myself for feeling any of these things because none of these things are genuine or true and my rational thinking mind knows that but for some reason my heart aches and my soul is uneasy. I am melancholic and some ghostly feelings of wanted to flee are rising within me again and I have to fight the urge to run. 
The strangest part of all are the weird dreams that I am having about dying. I have been having a reoccurring dream where I look down at myself mid-dream and suddenly realise that I am haemorrhaging buckets and buckets of blood onto the ground without even knowing that I am cut or injured. And this blood appears to be coming from deep within me but I don't know how it started or why I am even bleeding. As you would image these dreams are desperately upsetting and I always wake up from them in a state of shock. 
Are these dreams associated with my feelings of emptiness and despondency? More than likely, and perhaps these feelings of emptiness are being presented to remind me of just how full and abundant my life really is. Perhaps the blood is symbolic of my life force draining away without me even realising it was; perhaps this drain has been happening for a while and I have only now become aware of it because the well has ran dry.
​Benjamin Franklin once said - When the well's dry, we know the worth of water. And this is so very true because we do take our health and wellbeing for granted, especially our support people and our security and it is not until they are removed that we get a very clear picture of what it feels like to be without them.  Just as Johnny Diesel once sang 'you never miss your water 'til you're dry.' And now that my well feels like it has dried up I need to dig deeper to find some wet earth again and to reignite the flow of positive energy. 
One thing that all of my self help endeavours has given to me is the knowledge to understand that no state, no matter how glum or all-encompassing it may feel, is permanent or unchangeable. I also know that it is completely normal and very human to stumble and fall every now and again. It is what keeps us balanced and grateful and aware that nothing is forever, guaranteed or without its flaws and fragilities.
So if I want to cry I shall and if I want to rest I shall and if I need to heal I will. I will do these things in my own time and at my own pace; for only I can colour my rainbow, etch my silver lining and refill my own wellspring. I am responsible for me, my wellbeing and my mindset and I do not have to hold on to any of these thoughts or feelings, I just have to open my hand and let them go and the well will begin to flow again. 
​It's time to exhale completely.... and then inhale again. 

THE DRY 
Release Date: 2020
Rating: MA 15+
Running Time: 117 mins
An Australian drama mystery based on the novel of the same name by Jane Harper and a sweet return to great Australian cinema for me. It's been a while since I have seen such an excellent depiction of the harsh, dry Aussie landscape and The Dry manages to captures it; and the attitudes of small rural communities in Victoria with a plausible authenticity. 
Federal Agent Aaron Falk (Eric Bana) returns to his home town under the request of his childhood friend's parents. They are seeking Falk's help in the investigation around their son's death and the strange and unsettling circumstances that surround it. Falk reluctantly tries to solve the mystery of the heinous crime but finds himself dragged back into another local drama that forced him to flee the town many years ago. 
Eric Bana is brilliant as Falk and it was so good to see him back on screen again after such a long hiatus. He is well supported by Genevieve O'Reilly, John Polson and Miranda Tapsell but it cannot be denied that The Dry  is definitely held up by Bana's performance. 
Amidst the complexities of the crimes being unveiled throughout the film are some really solid messages about small town loyalties and the need for secrecy and acceptance in tight knit rural communities. The struggles of the farmers and labourers are also touched upon and the unforgiving and dangerous Aussie landscape provides a perfectly formidable backdrop to all of the drama.
FINAL SAY: The biggest secrets can never stay hidden. 
3 Chilli Peppers ​

Yep, it's another round of lockdown for all Victorians in Australia. The government are attempting to give this proposed 7 day compulsory 'shut in' a more palatable name by calling it a 'circuit breaker' lockdown which implies that it will be short. And yes, none of us can deny that the previous 5 day short lockdown in April did seem to do the trick in curbing the rising numbers and stopping the spread, but at this stage of the game I think that Victorians are just so tired of being put under restrictions again (this is our fourth one now) that they are just about ready to rampage in the streets. 
And even though I am all for a lockdown if it's going to save lives, there is absolutely no denying that we wouldn't have needed to do this again if the government hadn't been rolling out the COVID-19 vaccination  at a snails pace this year.  The vaccine has only just become eligible for 40-49 year olds, which is mine and Craig's age bracket, but when we called this weekend to organise getting the jab, the soonest date that we could muster was July 4th! That is hardly rushing things through now is it? And what about anyone under 40? They are still looking at months of waiting until they are even eligible to receive the vaccine. It's a big load of bullshit if you ask me. You cannot keep enforcing lockdowns when there is a vaccine available, people are going to riot. 
I think that the Australian government needs to focus on pouring all of its energies and equity into getting everyone in the country vaccinated, starting with all Victorians, obviously! Everyone in Melbourne and then everyone in the rural parts of Victoria, we Victorians have all endured enough lockdowns and shut ins and the fall out from is costing the government a mint, so let's just get this done for goodness sake.  We should've all been immunised by April 2021 if the government had been able to commit to it's initially planned roll out anyway. 
I do have some serious concerns about the mental wellbeing of singles, widows and isolated elderly people, not to mention the poor teenagers, the hospitalised and the first time mothers. It's just cruel being locked in for long periods of time for some people, and while introverts across Victoria may be high fiving themselves at the prospect of a super long weekend, for some this time represents another stint of loneliness, isolation and financial hardship. So, let's keep the people in our thoughts who may not find this time so easy and make sure that we are there to prop them up and support them as much as we can. Let's hold out the hope that immunisations do roll out faster and Covid-19 becomes a distant part of our history and not our current reality, sooner than later. 
And above all else, take care of yourself, your families, your health and your mental wellbeing during this challenging time. Don't be worn down by this latest setback, stay strong and most importantly stay alert because if history is anything to go by, we really don't ever  know what may be around the next corner. 

​THE MITCHELLS VS THE MACHINES
Release Date: 2021 
Rating: PG
Running Time: 113 mins 
Are you looking for an animated family movie that has both comedy and science fiction? Well, look no further because The Mitchells vs the Machines has both of those things in buckets as well as a huge ensemble voice cast, some really quirky animation techniques and a truly interesting storyline. 
A dysfunctional and unique family head out on a final 'hoo-rah' road trip together to drop their eldest child off at college. Unfortunately their plans are interrupted by a hostile robot uprising that threatens all life on Earth. 
This film is both funny and fun and delivers two terrifically interesting storyline plots simultaneously. On one hand this is a tale about redefining the meaning of family and on the other hand it's a story about an evil robot uprising.  Both storylines are great and the whole experience is enhanced by the colourful and fast paced animations and the incredible voice cast that boasts the likes of Abbi Jacobson, Danny McBride, Maya Rudolph, Eric Andre, Conan O'Brien and Olivia Coleman. 
Steaming on Netflix, The Mitchells vs the Machines is a must see for the whole family. 
FINAL SAY: The endgame has begun. 
3.5 Chilli Peppers

Sometimes things in life are certainly not as linear or as straight forward as we would like them to be. In fact, quite often you can have two opposing thoughts, ideas or concepts running at the exact same time in your life which may seem to be  in contradiction of each other.
What do I mean by this? Well, I was reading a really interesting article by clinical psychologist Dr Heidi Green the other day about opposing energies in our lives and she had an excellent list that gave examples of how two things in our lives can be true at the same time. 
Here are some examples:

• Your parents did the best that they could, AND their choices wounded you. 
• You love someone AND you know it's not healthy to keep them in your life.
• You're terrified to take the next step AND you know it's the right thing to do. 
• You want to have a healthy relationship AND unresolved trauma is making it difficult. 
• You're afraid to fail AND you believe in yourself. 
• You really want to get fit AND you hate to exercise  (I actually just made that one up myself and yep, it's probably one of my own opposing truths)

​Food for thought right? Well it certainly was for me because I have a couple of opposing truths functioning in my life right now and having those two dialogues running at the same time can make you feel rather torn about your choices and decisions if you can't manage them well. 
So what can you do about your opposing truths? To be honest, sometimes you don't have to do anything about them but accept them to be the truth and learn to live with the fact that things aren't always tidy, easy or finished off with a neat little bow in life. Some opposing truths are just that, TRUTHS! Truths about yourself that you need to swallow, digest and accept. And as long you aren't in denial about those truths, then maybe you don't need to do anything about them. 
However, if you are allowing yourself to hang on to destructive, dangerous or potentially damaging truths about yourself then it is probably high time that you faced your opposing truths head on and started to make choices that are more inline with what you want to do, who you wish to become or how you want to be perceived. Not being willing to change things about yourself that are holding you back, perpetuating a problem or keeping you in denial is never going to be good for your overall wellbeing, so tackle any damning oppositional truths about yourself as soon as you can. 
And most importantly, at the end of the day, be gentle with yourself. Facing opposing truths about who you are isn't always easy and most of us have at least one or two of them.  Some of them will feel like bitter pills to swallow, some will feel like downright poison and burn on the way down and then some will feel like a cloud passing you by on blue sky day as you let them go and turn your attentions to more pressing matters. 
And always remember that opposing truths are both truths about you and who you are and in being so, you always have the power to squash one and bring the other one into the light at any given time, and that really is some food for thought. 

LOVE AND MONSTERS 
Release Date: 2020
Rating: PG
Running Time: 109 mins
An adventure film directed by Michael Matthews that hits some unexpectedly high notes with it's unique mix of coming of age story and monsterpocalypse action. 
After the destruction of an asteroid heading for Earth, the chemical fallout causes all of the cold blooded animals to mutate into large monsters that seem hell bent on destroying humanity. Humans are forced underground to survive and after 7 years in a bunker, Josh (the least likely hero of the story) decides to trek above ground to be reunited with his long lost teenage crush Aimee who lives in a beach colony across the state. 
There is a lot to enjoy here so don't be put off by the cheesy title. Firstly, it's fun and fast moving and the monsters and action scenes are really well orchestrated. Also the actors, especially Dylan O'Brien who plays Josh, are really likeable and the complete silliness of the whole thing makes it really fun to watch. And last but not least, it's pretty squeaky clean as far as sex, language and gore goes, which makes it very family friendly and mighty rare for a monster flick. 
FINAL SAY:  I really didn't have your typical upbringing. I mean, I did at first and then the world ended. 
3 Chilli Peppers ​

I'd love to say that the Easter bunny brought a delightful harvest of chocolates to our home, and although we were given an array of lovely nibbles, no-one really felt much like eating any of them because we had an insidious bout of gastro hit our home the week before Easter. And it wasn't just a 24 hour bug either, it was a real 'hang-er-on-er' virus that managed to linger in our home for days and days, making everyone in the house feel generally lethargic, crampy, miserable and very uninterested in food for the days leading up to Easter, during the Easter long weekend and for a few days after as well.
Hardly the nicest way to start your Easter holiday break but at least I didn't have to worry about being at work or looking even somewhat presentable because I have basically schlumped about the house like bag lady for the last couple of days in the most unkempt of states and I am now looking forward to getting out of the house and out of my own way as soon as possible. The lack of exercise and inability to drink much water (due to the fact that everything nauseates me)  has made me feel gross and as flat as a pancake, and not a delicious whipped cream, maple syrup topped kind of a pancake, more like that first test run pancake that you make to check if the pan is hot enough. You know the one I mean, it's half cooked, misshapen and usually ends up on the back lawn for the birds to reluctantly peck away at, that is the kind of flat pancake that I have felt like recently. A shithouse one!
Thankfully tomorrow I have a really good excuse to pull my shit together because I have a spa day planned with the ladies. a full on treat yourself day.  We have had this day planned since the Easter break in 2020, but due to COVID-19 were unable to make it actually come to fruition until now, so this is a long awaited and much anticipated spa day out in Daylesford. I can not wait! I am so keen for a decent massage that I am not even concerned about everyone seeing me in a swimsuit in the mineral pools and saunas, I couldn't care less.
However, I am going to need a serious de-fuzzing this evening before I even consider wearing my swimmers in a public place because I look like a yeti from the waist down. And now that I come to think of it, I don't think that my bathers have even seen the light of day since I went snorkelling in Vanuatu, which is almost 18 months ago now, so I'd better check that they are still decent enough to be worn at a public spa facility.  Saltwater can really deteriorate a swimsuit over time, imagine if I put them on the morning and my whole ass was hanging out! Hilarious for me, really not comfortable for my friends or any other poor sod who happens to be at the spa, so yeah I'd better check that out ahead of time. 
Anyway, Easter wasn't a total wash out. I did get to spend Easter Sunday with my family and although I didn't feel like feasting, I did have an excuse to slam the couch and binge watch a few TV series and films over the long weekend and I did get gifted some mighty fine and delicious treats which I know that I am going to really enjoy when I get an appetite back. At the moment I am still on a BRAT diet. The old Banana, Rice, Applesauce and Toast routine that is generally the only safe thing to eat after you've been a blast ended skrewt and had a gastric virus.  It's an old remedy, but it totally works and restores your gut back to full health pretty quickly if you can stick to it. I want to enjoy spa day tomorrow, so I have stuck to it and it's worked for me. I am feeling completely well today, so I'm sticking to the BRAT diet for one more day just to be sure. Anyway, I better go check out my swim cozy and defuzz myself because tomorrow I am going to have the best day out in the sunshine with my friends! It will be the best post- Easter gift to myself that I've ever had!

THE KING OF STATEN ISLAND 
Release Date: 2020
Rating: MA 15+
Running Time: 136 mins 
An American drama/ comedy directed by Judd Apatow and adapted from one of Apatow's screenplays. The King of Staten Island delivers something that is both objectionable and yet also tender and poignant. And I know that sounds strange but trust me when I say that you will feel annoyed, angry, upset, tearful and even a little sympathetic for the characters as you join them on this interesting journey that can really only be described as a belated coming of age tale.
Ever since his firefighter father died in a tragic incident when he was seven, Scott has had an overwhelming case of arrested development. As a 24 year old adult he is lazy, un-motivated, self indulgent and has a serious addiction to marijuana and not owning his own shit. When he burns all of his bridges and suddenly finds himself homeless, Scott is finally forced to re-evaluate his life choices.
The cast is tremendously good here with Pete Davidson shining as Scott Carlin, Marisa Tomei delivering as his long suffering mother Margie, Bill Burr believably filling the role of the would be step-father and Steve Buscemi showing his age in a dignified manner as Papa, the mature aged fire fighter. 
The King of Staten Island not only addresses the impact of loss and despondency but also the impact that long-term adolescence has on everyone around the perpetrator. It's a genuinely powerful tale about our modern age and a more reflective offering from Apatow than I have seen before. 
FINAL SAY: We're like the only place that New Jersey looks down on.
​3.5 Chilli Peppers ​

I try to be zen about things. Sometimes being zen means setting boundaries so that you can protect your energy. This is not a selfish thing to do, it's wise and wonderful. If you protect your energy then you will have more in the tank for the things that you find most important. You will be able to prioritize better, focus more and generally stay in the zen zone, even when things are hardly zen at all. 
The other day I forgot to meditate. Not that big of a deal, I just got super busy and forgot to sit down and turn on my timer on insight and record my meditation effort. I had a super mindful day and was actually zenning out and reflecting quite a bit throughout the day, I just didn't record it. As a consequence of not recording any actual meditation on the app that I use, I lost a 335 day meditation streak on insight timer, and I was so determined to clock 365 days of meditation in a row this year. I was so angry and disappointed with myself for forgetting to sit and turn that app on, I was a bit crushed and pretty peeved. And then I realised that I was pouring way too much energy and emphasis on maintaining my streak of consecutive days rather than the actual act of meditation.
It was almost like I was being given the ultimate test of shifting my focus from the consecutive streak day stats to the actual act of meditating and letting go. Well, I don't actually have to let go of the goal, I can still aim to reach 365 consecutive days of meditation, it's just going to take me a while longer now and hey, I've made my peace with that and it's totally okay. However, when I first realised that I had lost my streak I never for a second stopped to think about just how amazing it was to get to 335 consecutive days of meditation, I just looked at it as a personal failure.
Staying zen when things don't turn out the way that you had hoped or planned that they would is probably one of the most challenging things that any of us will ever face.  And that's why it's crucial that you protect your energy, stay focused on what really matters and shake off the setbacks and reframe them as potential areas of growth. Bashing yourself for every error and shortcoming, fighting yourself and others whenever things don't go as planned and struggling to find the big picture are all ways to really burn out your energy and waste your time. 
Other things that you can be doing on the daily to protect your energy in small but significant ways are:

• Not answering the phone when you don't want to talk.
• Replying to text messages when it suits you.
• Speaking kindly to yourself when you're dealing with uncomfortable feelings.
• Waking up earlier to ground yourself before the day gets busy.
• Letting go and not feeling like you need to fight to be right.
• Choosing your battles wisely - knowing when to hold them and when to fold them. 
• Leaving events, conversations and interactions when your energy is being drained (peacefully stepping away).
• Knowing that putting yourself first every now and then is not selfish, it's smart.
• Taking time to restore, relax and reflect every day. 

Don't allow situations, other people or setbacks dictate how your day, week, month or year are going to pan out. Protect your energy and be kind to yourself daily. Don't let the little things hijack your amygdala, you are the only one who can determine how your energy is going to be used, so take control and covet it. Don't waste it, channel your unique and beautiful energy into being a better and more balanced you.

POSSESSOR
Release Date: 2020
Rating: R 18+
Running Time: 103 mins 
A science fiction horror film written and directed by Brandon Cronenberg. Let me start by saying that this film is not an easy watch. Just like his father David Cronenberg, Brandon has his gore levels set to stun. I saw the uncut version and although this is a truly stylish and engaging sci-fi horror, it is also extremely graphic and violent so I feel compelled to offer a caution to viewers of a sensitive nature around the confronting material in this movie. 
In an alternate 2008, Tasya Vos - an assassin with the capability to control other people's bodies, undertakes another big job. However, this time when Vos enters her host's body to perform the hit, there are complications and things rapidly spiral out of control. 
The acting, storyline and effects are so mesmerising in Possessor, which makes the unrelentingly aggression and violence a little more tolerable. I really enjoyed the gripping ending and loved the overall feel of this eerie 'body snatching' movie. And maybe I'm losing my edge as I get older by saying this, but some of the intensely violent kill scenes just felt a bit unnecessary and in my opinion, could've been scaled back without sacrificing the integrity of the film in any way. But that's just me, see it and decide for yourself. 
FINAL SAY: Pull me out.
3.5 Chilli Peppers ​

The sad truth about the world is that not everyone is lovely. Not everyone is kind, generous or looking out for your best interests. The reality is that there are an unfortunate number of not very nice people in this world and we will unfortunately all experience them from time to time. However, if you can spot these shady characters early enough, you can save yourself a lot of unnecessary heartache and stress by avoiding their dramatics and not getting dragged into their very calculating and effective methods. Meeting these people is one thing but having them constantly in your life is a whole other thing, so early detection is vital when it comes to self preservation. 
Here are the top six personality types that I personally find the most toxic and hard to deal with. You are definitely going to encounter these people in your lifetime, they're going to pop up in all walks of life. And although I wouldn't encourage you to go around naming and shaming people that fall into these categories, I do believe that you should actively attempt to avoid encouraging them into your life if you wish to maintain a happy balance and rewarding healthy relationships.
Let's take a closer look at the dirty half dozen!
THE NARCISSIST:
The narcissist really only cares about themselves. They have an inflated sense of self importance and they lack empathy towards others. They yearn to be admired and therefore are unable to accept any form of criticism. They are also dreadful listeners, so they won't remember the things you tell them. Narcissists will often seek relationships with people that are co-dependant, thus allowing them to maintain power and control. People will often describe them as cocky, manipulative, selfish, patronizing and demanding. 
​THE CONTROLLER:
This person likes to be in control of everything. They are micro-managers and gas lighters who make you feel like you can't get anything right. They will struggle greatly to admit when they make a mistake or do something wrong themselves. They will force their beliefs in an almost dictator like fashion and have little tolerance for people who don't follow their standards or 'toe the line.' People will describe them as intolerant, stressful, hypocritical and hypercritical. 
THE DRAMA MAGNET:
This person is a gossip. They love to talk about other people and cannot be trusted to maintain your confidence. If they hear it, they will repeat it, even if it means sacrificing relationships. They are compulsively driven and drawn to drama everywhere that they go and trouble seems to follow them, but really they are the ones creating it. They will put you in uncomfortable positions and try to drag you into their dramas. People will describe them as hard work, overly dramatic, difficult and unreliable. 
THE ENERGY VAMPIRE:
Ever walked away from a conversation feeling completely drained? Then you have met an energy vampire. They zap your energy with their negative rants and overwhelming need to make everything about them. They almost seem to feed off negative energy and will continuously make stupid or bad choices in life so that they can constantly play the victim card. They love to criticise and can often be bullies that will attempt to coerce your feelings and emotions over to their way of thinking.  People will describe them as mean, critical, dark and unfriendly. 
THE COMPULSIVE LIAR:
Compulsive lying is sometimes called pathological lying; its a serious anxiety disorder and people with this condition will lie about matters big and small. They will fabricate lies that are both black and white and struggle to be honest with everyone around them. A compulsive liar is often covering up a deeply sensitive psyche that cannot handle rejection so they use lying as a way to manipulate and control situations to their advantage. People around them will call them inconsistent, dramatic, untrustworthy and odd. 
THE GREEN EYED MONSTER:
This person seems to be unable to be happy for others and is never excited to hear about the achievements or good fortune of others.  They love to play the victim card and will often over-ride other people's happy tales with stories of woe about themselves. It doesn't matter what is happening, the green eyed monster has done it harder, had it worse or can minimise anyone else's grief or joy so that it seems pale or insignificant in comparison to their own experiences. People will describe them as negative, closed minded, catastrophising and troublesome. 

So there you have it, the dirty half dozen. The six hardest and most manipulating characters to avoid if you want to keep misery and strife of your life, which you know we all do! 

MISERY
Release Date: 1990
Rating: MA 15+
Running Time: 107 mins 
A psychological thriller directed by Rob Reiner and based on the 1987 Stephen King novel of the same name. Misery was one of the first horror novels that I ever read as a teenager and I can assure you that none of the thrills or chills have been lost in this film adaption. 
Famous novelist Paul Sheldon has a car accident on a remote road during a wild blizzard and is thankfully rescued by a nurse named Annie Wilkes. Anne is extremely excited when she discovers that Paul is the writer of her favourite book series based on the adventures of a character called Misery Chastain. Annie insists on helping Paul back to health in her own home and encourages him to write his next novel whilst his injuries mend. However, Paul soon realises that Annie is not just a fan of the Misery series but rather a full blown obsessed loon who will stop at nothing to get the next instalment of her favourite book series.
Misery is greatly enhanced by the brilliant acting performances with James Caan and Kathy Bates both delivering a convincing and disturbingly nail biting, edge of your seat thriller that will have you shouting out in shock and despair. This is a top notch thriller that shouldn't be missed. 
FINAL SAY: Annie, whatever you're thinking of doing, please don't do it.
3.5 Chilli Peppers ​

Another five day lockdown has been enforced for the state of Victoria, which is now the third of its kind and the first for 2021. A very large part of me was strongly hoping and dare I say it....praying, that the days of formal lockdowns were finally behind us. With the vaccine on the way I even allowed myself to feel a bit of release from all of the COVID-19 worries and concerns, but obviously I was wrong. 
When your state Premiere calls a full lockdown that will start in less than 12 hours, you do tend to get nervous, very nervous. And it would be fair to say that some people did appear to go into instant shock, spontaneous worry and some even went right back into toilet paper hording mode as well.  And although this can only be described as inconvenient for most of us, for some us this five day lockdown is actually deeply problematic. 
If you had a wedding or funeral to attend this weekend than this recent lockdown would've been devastating. If you had tickets for an event or had a big soiree planned then this would be fricken' annoying and if you are the sort of person that plays out a million worse case scenarios when things like this occur then this would be a seriously disturbing time for you.  I am pretty certain that there have been a billion inconveniences created by yet another lockdown. 
However, let's try to flip this and find some positives. Firstly, this new, mutant, highly contagious mother load COVID strain that is currently getting around is a killer - even more then the original strain and that's the one that we are locking down for. Worth doing? Yes, it's worth doing, we all know that isolation saves lives, so we are doing our bit to take care of ourselves and others when we comply to these lockdown scenarios. I have faith that Dan Andrews and his medical advisory team wouldn't make this call unless it was imperative and in our best interests, so okay, I'm going with the flow there.
Secondly, at this stage it is only five days. Now I know that's easy to say when I'm not missing out or sacrificing anything major and I don't want to minimize anyone else's struggle, but for most of us - ITS ONLY 5 DAYS - get over it! After being in lockdown for months, this feels like a walk in the park, very manageable and totally okay for the most part. Fingers crossed that it doesn't turn out to be more than 5 days now that I've said all that, but at this moment, I'm going with what I know. 
Also, for a lot of people this latest lockdown will actually just look like a five day weekend.  Not for everyone of course and definitely not for me, but for some people this is going to be a high five moment where a little lockdown time just offers them the chance to rest, reboot and restart their engines for 2021. And to those people I say - you lucky bastards! Enjoy the time  and be gracious and respectful about the way that you have received the time because this is not a time of celebration for everyone. 
And if you still can't find a positive from any of that, then I suggest that you spend some time focusing on the things that you can control  rather than the things that you cannot. What the hell does that mean? Well, I mean rather than getting all worked up over the latest state of affairs which you have absolutely no power or control over anyway, why don't you turn your thoughts around onto yourself and consider the things that you can manage, even from a lockdown perspective.
Things like:

• How you react to people and situations
• What you eat
• How you treat yourself and your body
• Who you spend you time with
• What you put your energy into
• How clean your home is
• How you speak to yourself and others 
• How much sleep you get
• Your morning routine
• What you do in your spare time
• How much exercise you get
• Your thoughts, hopes, dreams and aspirations

These challenging times can actually be a wonderful time for some introspection and contemplation, so why not try and shift your mindset and consider seeing things from a whole new angle. 

THE DIG
Release Date: 2021 
Rating: PG
Running Time: 112 mins 
A British period drama directed by Australian film and theatre director Simon Stone and based on the 2007 novel of the same name by John Preston. The Dig, released by Netflix, delivers a delightful true story adaptation of an important archaeological dig and the events and people that surrounded the excavation. 
An historically important dig is occurring in the quiet township of Sutton Hoo, Britain in 1938; coinciding with the commencement of WW2. The lives of those involved with the excavation become swept up in the celebration, drama and trepidation of the time, whilst also dealing with their own personal struggles. 
Carey Mulligan and Ralph Fiennes give stellar portrayals of the real life stakeholders Edith Pretty and Basil Brown and the superb English countryside makes for a most beautiful backdrop. The cinematography is exceptionally good here thanks to Mike Eley's keen eye and many of the shots are so perfectly executed that it almost feels like a piece of art. 
Overall, I was pleasantly surprised by The Dig not only for it's terrific performances and visual appeal but also for its genuinely wholesome and interesting script which is a combination of story telling that I don't see as often as I would like to. 
FINAL SAY: From the first human handprint on a cave wall, we're part of something continuous. 
3.5 Chilli Peppers ​

What do you know about Post Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD)? After recently viewing the film His House  on Netflix (a movie that is clearly focused on the topic of PTSD) I decided that I needed to delve a little deeper and really flesh out my understanding of this truly crippling mental health condition. 
By definition, PTSD arises when a person fails to recover after experiencing or witnessing a terrifying event. Clearly what people can perceive as terrifying varies greatly so triggers can vary greatly as well. And the length of time for a sufferers symptoms can vary hugely as well, with some lasting for weeks and others months or even years after an event. People diagnosed with PTSD will suffer from crippling emotional and physical reactions to memories of their trauma. These can occur in flashbacks, nightmares, avoidance of triggering situations, heightened reactivity to stimuli or external anxieties and they can occur without warning or can present in a predictive pattern. 
People that have been diagnosed can have a vast range of traumas, however most commonly PTSD is triggered by events around serious accidents, physical or sexual assault, war or torture and disasters such as bushfire or flood. And it is really important to acknowledge that witnessing these events can also trigger PTSD and many sufferers have been bystanders to the afflictions of others and had massive PTSD fallout because of that. 
Sufferers of PTSD usually experience four main types of difficulties:
Re-living the traumatic event: The person will relive or replay the event through unwanted memories or recall. They can be awake or asleep and they will experience intense and crippling emotional and physical reactions to these thoughts such as sweating, heart palpitations or panic attacks. 
Being overtly wound up: A person with PTSD will be very unsettled. They may have trouble sleeping, feel irritable and/or lack concentration. They may have eating difficulties, become easily startled and be constantly on the lookout for danger. 
Avoiding reminders of the event: A PTSD sufferer will deliberately avoid activities, places, people, thoughts or feelings associated with the event because they bring back painful memories or feelings associated with guilt and shame. 
Feeling emotionally numb: The person loses interest in day-to-day activities. They will feel cut off and detached from family and friends and will feel emotionally flat and hopeless. To others, they will appear depressed and distant.
It is actually not uncommon for people suffering from PTSD to experience other mental health problems at the same time which may have developed in direct response to their traumatic event. These additional problems most commonly are depression, anxiety and alcohol or drug abuse. 
Anyone can suffer from PTSD following a traumatic event, however people are at a greater risk if the event involved deliberate harm such as physical or sexual assault or if they have suffered repeated traumatic experiences such as childhood abuse or living in a war zone. Pretty much any ongoing trauma or stressful event can constitute an episode of PTSD especially if there was an absence of social support at the time of the event.
Current statistics estimate that in Australia we have a very high occurrence of PTSD. We are actually one of the the top 5 countries in the world for PTSD with around 12% of  the population suffering from some form of PTSD in their lifetimes, which will more than likely be linked to a serous accident. Women are also twice as likely to suffer from this disorder than men and this may be linked to the fact that women are also more likely to suffer sexual assault than men, however it is also important to recognise that PTSD symptoms do not always show up immediately after a traumatic event. Some victims have shown symptoms up to two years after a traumatic event with their symptoms only surfacing after another event triggers their stress reaction. 
It is also interesting to note that recent studies have shown that people living in first world countries are more likely to suffer from PTSD than people living in third world countries. It seems paradoxical, but it appears that PTSD is linked to something that violates your expectations. If you live in a part of the world that is basically safe and then something happens to turn those ideas around then it is harder to get over and your trauma will be deeper. 
The good new is that help is readily available to suffers of PTSD and a visit to a local GP will certainly get the ball rolling on effective treatment and support. The three main types of therapy that are used to support sufferers are:

1. Psychological treatments (talk therapy)  -  eg. trauma focused cognitive behavioural therapy, eye movement desensitisation and reprocessing. 
2. Physical treatments (medications) - eg. antidepressants such as serotonin reuptake inhibitors. 
3. Self Help therapy - eg. mindfulness, relaxation therapy and exercise.

And there is really positive evidence to support that a combination of these three therapies is very effective at managing PTSD and thousands of sufferers have been able to to claim back their lives and manage their stress disorder by employing these methods. 
If you suspect that you or anyone around you is suffering from PTSD  I recommend that you start by checking out the Phoenix Australia website. Phoenix is the centre for posttraumatic mental health in Australia and they are dedicated to reducing the levels of trauma in sufferers by building capabilities within individuals and communities to enhance understanding, prevention and recovery processes. They have put together some incredibly useful resources, online toolkits and support materials for sufferers and it is a great place to start if you are seeking more information or help around the topic of PTSD. 

HIS HOUSE 
Release Date: 2020
Rating: MA 15+
Running Time: 93 mins 
A psychological thriller/ horror written and directed by Remi Weekes and adapted from a story by Felicity Evans and Toby Venables. This thought provoking film was released on Netflix in October 2020 and it delivers enough creepy atmosphere and contemplation to appease any horror loving audience.
Bol and Rial are recent British refugees from South Sudan. They are placed into a run down government housing estate where they attempt to assimilate, but the trauma of their lives in South Sudan and the loss of their daughter haunts them and life becomes a constant battle. 
This film is clearly an allegory to victims of Post Traumatic Stress Disorder and it is delivered in an eerie, unique and claustrophobic manner that felt reminiscent of other clever psychological thrillers like The Babadook. 
The acting here is rock solid with Wunmi Mosaku and Sope Dirisu both delivering plausible and emotional portrayals of a couple desperately trying to manage their trauma. The storyline is scary and also deeply intriguing, and by the end of it all I felt quite moved and affected; this film really does leave you thinking. 
FINAL SAY: Your ghosts follow you. They never leave.
3.5 Chilli Peppers ​

Last night, on a most auspicious blue moon, we all celebrated Halloween at Enfield. This involved much feasting on various candy, pumpkin soup, pulled pork and slaw Vietnamese rolls and cinnamon scrolls which left us all in a food coma by 11pm. And although the Trick or Treaters were thin on the ground this year due to COVID-19, we still managed to carve out four incredibly good looking jack-o-lanterns, make some candy apples and watch a decent serve of horror material. All round a pretty successful Halloween celebration in my mind. 
However, I have to say that there is nothing that I could stream on any channel that would compare to the real life horrors that I have been hearing about over the past few weeks. As I had feared, as the restrictions of COVID-19 begin to ease, more and more crazies are starting to emerge from the wood work. Women that I personally know have been stalked, harassed, followed, abused and in more than a couple of incidents cheated on by their long term partners. One woman I know even found out that her partner had been stalking another woman! What the fuck is going on here?
The consequences of this have obviously made these poor women feel extremely violated, unsafe, emotional and deeply insecure. I can't even express how genuinely horrified I am by the frequency that I am hearing these kinds of difficult and dreadful tales. I am now more than ever also seriously concerned that this type of thing is a sign that more of the same is to come.
Is it fair to pin all of this on the COVID-19 restrictions? Maybe, maybe not. Perhaps these motivations and perversions have always existed within these individuals and isolation has just amplified the strange and depraved behaviours that they were always harbouring. Either way, it's not good and it appears to be on the rise. 
​A recent statistical bulletin produced by the Australian Government  on July 2020 discusses the prevalence of domestic violence among women during the initial stages of the COVID-19 pandemic. The online survey asked 15,000 women that had previously reported abuse to complete a survey, not surprisingly less than 5% of those women took the survey. However, from that 4.6 percent it was cited that the pandemic had coincided with the onset or escalation of violence and abuse from their current or previous partners. 
Furthermore, only 3 months ago The Sydney Morning Herald published an article saying that one in ten Australian women are currently experiencing domestic violence or abuse during the coronavirus pandemic, with attacks becoming more intense and frequent according to reports. 
And Australia is not the only country to be seeing a rise in these kinds of behaviours, it's a worldwide epidemic that is fast following on the heels of COVID-19. Across the globe crisis calls coming in from women has risen by as much as 18% and the most alarming statistic of all is that around 40% of women that are abused, harassed or stalked around the world never actually report anything to the authorities, so it is impossible for anyone to really know just how bad things have gotten. 
In an attempt to aide and counsel abused families the Australian government has announced a $150 million domestic violence emergency response package to boost front line and national support services over the period of the pandemic, which is certainly a step in the right direction. But it's a Band-Aid effect that is treating the outcome of a disease but not really getting to the core of what we can do to prevent this type of thing from happening in the future. Where is the funding to rehabilitate the perpetrators? What can we actually do to stop this type of thing from occurring? This is also clearly where we need more funding and training, especially when the statistics show that 33% of women reporting abuse and harassment at the moment have never experienced it before, so it's evidently on the rise.
As I said earlier I feared that things would become even more dangerous for women because of COVID-19 and unfortunately it looks like I was right. Aside from remaining supportive and caring to friends and family around you who may already be suffering right now, it's also important to remember to be hyper vigilant, cautious and super safe yourself. And I do not say that lightly. The fallout from the coronavirus may mean that wearing face masks may not be the only new norm. Supporting women in crisis and dealing with volatile, unhinged men may also become our new norm, so I do urge you to please take care out there ladies. 

SHUTTER ISLAND 
Release Date: 2010
Rating: MA 15+
Running Time: 138 mins 
A neo-noir psychological thriller directed by Martin Scorsese, written by Laeta Kalogridis and based on Dennis LeHane's 2003 novel of the same name. In general people have been quite polarised with their reactions to this film and that's because this isn't an easy movie. In short, Shutter Island is a deep dive in the psyche that delivers as much intrigue as a Hitchcock classic and as much crazy as One Flew Over the Cuckoo's Nest. 
A Deputy US Marshal and his partner have been hired to investigate a psychiatric facility for the criminally insane on Shutter Island after one of their patients goes missing. From the moment that they arrive, it appears that the facility is harbouring secrets. 
A stellar cast are all really delivering here, with memorable performances from Leonardo DiCaprio, Mark Ruffalo, Ben Kingsley and Michelle Williams. The overall atmosphere and ominous vibe of the film is undeniably palpable. Whether you love it or hate it, I guarantee that you won't forget it in a hurry.  
FINAL SAY: Which would be worse - to live as a monster? Or to die as a good man?
3.5 Chilli Peppers ​