When it comes to the things that we just can't live without, our minds always go straight to the things that we love and cherish the most in the world. For some that is a beloved pet or a much loved spouse, or perhaps an amazing parent or friend. For others it could be something more abstract like their own sense of self, their freedom or their generosity. For me it is my children, hands down, no debate, they are the only thing on the planet that I could never live without.
I doubt that I could survive a day without my children in the world, I just wouldn't want to. They don't need to be with me everyday, they just need to be in the world, and preferably healthy and happy of course. I think that children departing before their parents is distressingly unnatural, and I often wonder how childless parents cope with their grief, the thought of it just chills me to the bone.
Craig is certainly up there as well when it comes to things that I can't live without, but I have never lived for Craig and he has never lived for me, we don't have that kind of a relationship. We are extremely close, but we both agree that life must go on without each other if that's the hand that we are dealt. If Craig leaves planet before I do, I would be seriously damaged and miss him like hell, but I know that I would go on, mainly because of my children.
Children really do become the number one priority in your life, no matter how clique that may sound, it's true. I know that childless people hate the parental diatribes and declarations of "you'll just never really understand until you have your own" but it is completely true. There is just no way to get around it. You never realise how much potential to love and care for another lives inside of you until you have something that you have personally created to really live for, and children are the best example of that that I know of. That's not to say that loving someone other than your child isn't as good or real or strong, but the instinct to survive and live for your children is truly unmatched by anything else that I know of.
When you feel like you want to give up, just the thought of your children is more than enough to keep you going. They are your blood, your sweat, your tears of joy and sadness; they are the very soul of you and the sum of you and the culmination of all of your efforts and experiences. And if you've done a good job, then they are also the best parts of you and the best parts of themselves all wrapped up into this extraordinary, interesting and ever evolving source of wonder and inspiration. How could anyone want to live without that?
Everyone will of course have a different opinion on what they can't live without, and so they should, everyone has their own quirks and perks, likes and dislikes, it's as individual as our fingerprints. Some parents will even disagree with me about children being at the top of the list, and that's okay too, not everyone adores their own children, I get that. There are in fact so many other things that I say that I can't live without, but I could if I really had to. However, without these things in the world, I would definitely find life a lot less tolerable and certainly a shit load less fun.
In no particular order, these are the other things that I would hate to have to live without:
Family, friends, movies, whiskey, nature, art, books, coffee, comedy, shared meals, music, yoga, dark chocolate, poetry, cats, green tea, fresh linen, open fire places, wine, the ocean, flannelette pjs, the night sky...I could actually go on for hours and hours now that I really think about it, there are a lot of things I love about the world and my life. Which I suppose essentially means that there is actually a heck of a lot in this world that is worth living for. Sometimes it is just good to ponder things like that, the good things, the best things, the stuff that makes it all seem a little bit brighter overall. It's good to know what keep your dinghy afloat in this world that's for sure.
I doubt that I could survive a day without my children in the world, I just wouldn't want to. They don't need to be with me everyday, they just need to be in the world, and preferably healthy and happy of course. I think that children departing before their parents is distressingly unnatural, and I often wonder how childless parents cope with their grief, the thought of it just chills me to the bone.
Craig is certainly up there as well when it comes to things that I can't live without, but I have never lived for Craig and he has never lived for me, we don't have that kind of a relationship. We are extremely close, but we both agree that life must go on without each other if that's the hand that we are dealt. If Craig leaves planet before I do, I would be seriously damaged and miss him like hell, but I know that I would go on, mainly because of my children.
Children really do become the number one priority in your life, no matter how clique that may sound, it's true. I know that childless people hate the parental diatribes and declarations of "you'll just never really understand until you have your own" but it is completely true. There is just no way to get around it. You never realise how much potential to love and care for another lives inside of you until you have something that you have personally created to really live for, and children are the best example of that that I know of. That's not to say that loving someone other than your child isn't as good or real or strong, but the instinct to survive and live for your children is truly unmatched by anything else that I know of.
When you feel like you want to give up, just the thought of your children is more than enough to keep you going. They are your blood, your sweat, your tears of joy and sadness; they are the very soul of you and the sum of you and the culmination of all of your efforts and experiences. And if you've done a good job, then they are also the best parts of you and the best parts of themselves all wrapped up into this extraordinary, interesting and ever evolving source of wonder and inspiration. How could anyone want to live without that?
Everyone will of course have a different opinion on what they can't live without, and so they should, everyone has their own quirks and perks, likes and dislikes, it's as individual as our fingerprints. Some parents will even disagree with me about children being at the top of the list, and that's okay too, not everyone adores their own children, I get that. There are in fact so many other things that I say that I can't live without, but I could if I really had to. However, without these things in the world, I would definitely find life a lot less tolerable and certainly a shit load less fun.
In no particular order, these are the other things that I would hate to have to live without:
Family, friends, movies, whiskey, nature, art, books, coffee, comedy, shared meals, music, yoga, dark chocolate, poetry, cats, green tea, fresh linen, open fire places, wine, the ocean, flannelette pjs, the night sky...I could actually go on for hours and hours now that I really think about it, there are a lot of things I love about the world and my life. Which I suppose essentially means that there is actually a heck of a lot in this world that is worth living for. Sometimes it is just good to ponder things like that, the good things, the best things, the stuff that makes it all seem a little bit brighter overall. It's good to know what keep your dinghy afloat in this world that's for sure.
AS GOOD AS IT GETS
Release Date: 1997
Rating: M
Running Time: 139 mins
Directed by James L. Brooks, As Good As It Gets saw Helen Hunt and Jack Nicholson win both the Best Actor and Best Actress Awards respectively at the Oscars, something that hadn't been achieved since 1991 with The Silence of the Lambs. Still ranking in at 141st on Empire magazine's "The 500 Greatest Movies of All Time" list, As Good As It Gets is a rare romance movie that will certainly stand the test of time.
Over a few interesting days, a misanthropic, racist, obsessive-compulsive novelist named Melvin Udall (Nicholson) has his life turned upside down. Already stretched after reluctantly taking on the responsibility of his gay neighbour's dog (Greg Kinnear) after he was hospitalized, Melvin gets pushed over the edge when his favourite waitress (Helen Hunt) doesn't turn up for her shift due to her extremely ill child. Melvin finds that by trying to correct the small hiccups in his life, he actually becomes more involved in the lives of others.
Jack Nicholson demonstrates why he keeps getting so many amazing movie roles, it's because he damn well deserves them! There is no-one in the world that could pull off such an asshole of a character like Melvin Udall with as much charisma and flair as Jack did. This is truly one of the most enjoyable romances that I have ever seen in my life, the performance are fantastic, the dialogue is witty and interesting and it just succeeds in so many ways, this is definitely one to place onto your must see list.
FINAL SAY: You make me want to be a better man.
4 .5 Chili Peppers
Release Date: 1997
Rating: M
Running Time: 139 mins
Directed by James L. Brooks, As Good As It Gets saw Helen Hunt and Jack Nicholson win both the Best Actor and Best Actress Awards respectively at the Oscars, something that hadn't been achieved since 1991 with The Silence of the Lambs. Still ranking in at 141st on Empire magazine's "The 500 Greatest Movies of All Time" list, As Good As It Gets is a rare romance movie that will certainly stand the test of time.
Over a few interesting days, a misanthropic, racist, obsessive-compulsive novelist named Melvin Udall (Nicholson) has his life turned upside down. Already stretched after reluctantly taking on the responsibility of his gay neighbour's dog (Greg Kinnear) after he was hospitalized, Melvin gets pushed over the edge when his favourite waitress (Helen Hunt) doesn't turn up for her shift due to her extremely ill child. Melvin finds that by trying to correct the small hiccups in his life, he actually becomes more involved in the lives of others.
Jack Nicholson demonstrates why he keeps getting so many amazing movie roles, it's because he damn well deserves them! There is no-one in the world that could pull off such an asshole of a character like Melvin Udall with as much charisma and flair as Jack did. This is truly one of the most enjoyable romances that I have ever seen in my life, the performance are fantastic, the dialogue is witty and interesting and it just succeeds in so many ways, this is definitely one to place onto your must see list.
FINAL SAY: You make me want to be a better man.
4 .5 Chili Peppers
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