This year will be my first Father's Day without my father in the world. It is a strange feeling to not have a father to rally around and celebrate on Father's Day and it makes the day slightly painful in many ways. What it has done is make me remember all of the things that I really loved about my dad and some of the things that I am really missing now that he is no longer with us.
It's so weird because sometimes I can still be watching a TV show or a movie and I will think to myself - dad would love this, I can't wait to tell him about this; and then I remember that he isn't here anymore and I feel really sad. One thing that I could always have a conversation with my dad about was movies, in fact I believe that a lot of my passion for movies actually derived from my fathers own passion for cinema. My dad loved movies, especially westerns, action films, war films and gutsy dramas, and like me, he could lose himself down a rabbit hole of movies for hours and hours; much to the disgust of my mother.
Dad and I could natter about movies for hours, we would recommend movies to each other and we would quote our favourite lines from movies to each other when we were talking about them. My dad understood what it felt like to be genuinely moved by movies and he would watch just about any genre, including art house and foreign cinema which we would often chat about. I really miss having my dad around to talk about TV and movies with and I miss the excitement that I felt when I would find a movie that I knew that he would love. He got DVD's on more than one occasion from me for Father's Day that's for sure.
I had a pretty special relationship with my dad and for all of his hard exterior and seemingly toxic masculine throw out comments, my dad could actually be a deeply compassionate, caring and genuinely gentle man. My dad offered me comfort, understanding and a sympathetic ear on more than a few occasions and I always felt, even though he could at times be so distant and aloof, that he had a soft spot for me that no-one else in my life has ever had.
They say that no-one will ever love you like your parents and when it came to my dad I believed that to be true. He loved me, he really did. And even though he struggled to demonstrate it times because of his own issues, he did love me like no-one else ever did or has since. He forgave me for every shortcoming or fault that I had growing up, he hugged me like he was going to break my ribs and he spoke to me in honest and revealing ways that told me that he trusted me and he loved me. I miss having a love like that in my life and even though Craig offers me a pretty huge love, like I said before, no-one will ever love you like a parent and I miss that unconditional love and mutual adoration greatly.
I also miss the old school Aussie larrikin side of my dad. Political correctness never quite reached my dad's wheelhouse and it meant that he was never afraid to say some scandalous but also quite funny things. I know that dad always fancied himself as a bit of a maverick and shocking people was something that I think that he enjoyed greatly. He was always the first to call bullshit on everything and sometimes it was really funny but it could also be quite revealing because my dad's tolerance for actual bullshit was incredibly low. Again I know that I also have inherited that quality from my dad as well as my quirky and cheeky sense of humour and I do miss having a laugh with my dad, he could be side splittingly funny when the mood took him.
And I suppose that's it's completely healthy and normal to miss my dad and to long for a little bit of what is now missing from my world. Holidays like Father's Day are always going to heighten my longing for more time and also make me reminisce about the times that we did get to share together. I guess that I should feel lucky that I have such great memories of my time with my dad to recall when I do feel the heaviness of the world without him and for that I will always be thankful.
Missing you dad...thinking of you and wishing that you were still around - Happy Father's Day xx
It's so weird because sometimes I can still be watching a TV show or a movie and I will think to myself - dad would love this, I can't wait to tell him about this; and then I remember that he isn't here anymore and I feel really sad. One thing that I could always have a conversation with my dad about was movies, in fact I believe that a lot of my passion for movies actually derived from my fathers own passion for cinema. My dad loved movies, especially westerns, action films, war films and gutsy dramas, and like me, he could lose himself down a rabbit hole of movies for hours and hours; much to the disgust of my mother.
Dad and I could natter about movies for hours, we would recommend movies to each other and we would quote our favourite lines from movies to each other when we were talking about them. My dad understood what it felt like to be genuinely moved by movies and he would watch just about any genre, including art house and foreign cinema which we would often chat about. I really miss having my dad around to talk about TV and movies with and I miss the excitement that I felt when I would find a movie that I knew that he would love. He got DVD's on more than one occasion from me for Father's Day that's for sure.
I had a pretty special relationship with my dad and for all of his hard exterior and seemingly toxic masculine throw out comments, my dad could actually be a deeply compassionate, caring and genuinely gentle man. My dad offered me comfort, understanding and a sympathetic ear on more than a few occasions and I always felt, even though he could at times be so distant and aloof, that he had a soft spot for me that no-one else in my life has ever had.
They say that no-one will ever love you like your parents and when it came to my dad I believed that to be true. He loved me, he really did. And even though he struggled to demonstrate it times because of his own issues, he did love me like no-one else ever did or has since. He forgave me for every shortcoming or fault that I had growing up, he hugged me like he was going to break my ribs and he spoke to me in honest and revealing ways that told me that he trusted me and he loved me. I miss having a love like that in my life and even though Craig offers me a pretty huge love, like I said before, no-one will ever love you like a parent and I miss that unconditional love and mutual adoration greatly.
I also miss the old school Aussie larrikin side of my dad. Political correctness never quite reached my dad's wheelhouse and it meant that he was never afraid to say some scandalous but also quite funny things. I know that dad always fancied himself as a bit of a maverick and shocking people was something that I think that he enjoyed greatly. He was always the first to call bullshit on everything and sometimes it was really funny but it could also be quite revealing because my dad's tolerance for actual bullshit was incredibly low. Again I know that I also have inherited that quality from my dad as well as my quirky and cheeky sense of humour and I do miss having a laugh with my dad, he could be side splittingly funny when the mood took him.
And I suppose that's it's completely healthy and normal to miss my dad and to long for a little bit of what is now missing from my world. Holidays like Father's Day are always going to heighten my longing for more time and also make me reminisce about the times that we did get to share together. I guess that I should feel lucky that I have such great memories of my time with my dad to recall when I do feel the heaviness of the world without him and for that I will always be thankful.
Missing you dad...thinking of you and wishing that you were still around - Happy Father's Day xx
BRAVEHEART
Release Date: 1995
Rating: MA 15+
Running Time: 178 mins
An epic historical and medieval war drama directed by Mel Gibson and based on Blind Harry's 15th century poem The Actes and Diedis of the Illustre and Vallyeant Campioun Schir William Wallace. Braveheart was nominated for a whopping ten Oscars at the 68th Academy Awards and won five of them, including Best Picture and Best Director.
Braveheart tells the legendary tale of William Wallace, a Scottish warrior who rallied against the English Monarch during the thirteenth century, and became a renown hero.
This movie did wonders for Scottish tourism, and had fans all around the world suddenly showing an interest in medieval history and swordsmanship. Mel Gibson is just tremendous as William Wallace, adding passion and strength to the legend of Wallace's name and proving that he is a serious talent by both acting in and directing the movie. It's such a shame that he went so wrong down the track when he had such favourable beginnings.
The landscapes in Braveheart are simply stunning, the battle scenes are grimy and brutal and the sentiments and bagpipes are on high alert. Overall, this is an awesome action movie and a sweeping saga all rolled into one, and I cannot deny that I thoroughly enjoyed it.
FINAL SAY: Tell our enemies that they may take our lives, but they'll never take our FREEDOM!
3.5 Chilli Peppers
Release Date: 1995
Rating: MA 15+
Running Time: 178 mins
An epic historical and medieval war drama directed by Mel Gibson and based on Blind Harry's 15th century poem The Actes and Diedis of the Illustre and Vallyeant Campioun Schir William Wallace. Braveheart was nominated for a whopping ten Oscars at the 68th Academy Awards and won five of them, including Best Picture and Best Director.
Braveheart tells the legendary tale of William Wallace, a Scottish warrior who rallied against the English Monarch during the thirteenth century, and became a renown hero.
This movie did wonders for Scottish tourism, and had fans all around the world suddenly showing an interest in medieval history and swordsmanship. Mel Gibson is just tremendous as William Wallace, adding passion and strength to the legend of Wallace's name and proving that he is a serious talent by both acting in and directing the movie. It's such a shame that he went so wrong down the track when he had such favourable beginnings.
The landscapes in Braveheart are simply stunning, the battle scenes are grimy and brutal and the sentiments and bagpipes are on high alert. Overall, this is an awesome action movie and a sweeping saga all rolled into one, and I cannot deny that I thoroughly enjoyed it.
FINAL SAY: Tell our enemies that they may take our lives, but they'll never take our FREEDOM!
3.5 Chilli Peppers
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