Thankfully, in the end it was not a major problem, it was just a problem with his heart medications which were causing him to become out of breath and excessively fatigued, so after another two days of tests and monitoring, I returned him home yesterday for the second time. Hopefully now, this time around, peace will truly come to the valley for I am now tired beyond all good reasoning. I am also well and truly over playing 'voice of reason' for my mother and sister who decided to get particularly vicious towards each other by the end of it all, so my theory of this all bringing us closer together was pretty pie in the sky.
I did have New Year's Eve to myself, with dad back in hospital and mum allowing some reprieve by going home for a couple of days, I spent the evening on the deck with Craig and the kids, going hard at oblivion and succeeding beautifully.
With a nice little hangover trailing behind me, I spent the first morning of the year alone by my father's hospital bed. This was the first time that I have been alone with my dad in many, many years and the conversation that we shared was extremely cathartic to the both of us. That morning may have been the only good thing to be gleaned from this awful and terrifying experience, and it may be one of the last times that I ever get to spend time alone with him. It is strange what a near death experience can do to a person, and for a while there, he wasn't even a shadow of the grumpy, easily tempered father of my youth, he was just an old man sharing his time with me. Those moments of quiet chatter were good for my soul. When someone you love almost dies, you learn to appreciate the small moments, they are suddenly so much more meaningful than they would've been before.
As the new year now stretches out like a lazy cat before me, I contemplate what I want to get done this year, and for the first time in many years I don't feel like I need to set myself an ultimate goal this time. I just want to keep living in the moment and finding more zen in the everyday things - just let it all happen as it happens. I am not making plans, not setting myself up for struggle or failure, but just taking it all one day at a time, one moment at a time. I know that I will continue to accomplish and learn because it is my nature to do so, I will never be satisfied to stay the same and not grow, but this year, I am going to let experiences come to me, and I will embrace them openly and willingly. This year I am going to allow myself to wander off road without a map.....no plans, no destinations.....let's just see where that takes me.
Release Date: 2000
Rating: PG
Running Time: 98 mins
This is a love story for adults, a film about being completely aware of your feelings but being adult enough to not have to act on every impulse. This is one of the most hypnotic and beautifully detailed movies that I have seen in along time, from the gorgeous costuming to the dramatic city streetscapes, I just adored the flow and lush tone of this film.
Set in 1962, two lonely neighbours form a strong bond when they realise that both of their spouses are being unfaithful. They vow to keep their relationship platonic, because they do not wish to perpetuate the disrespect that their spouses have shown them.
A Chinese language film, made in Hong Kong and directed by Wong Kar-wai, In The Mood For Love in it's original Chinese title means "the age of blossoms" or "the flowery years" which is a Chinese metaphor for the fleeting time of youth, beauty and love, which should give you some idea about the romantic nature of this film. The movie premiered at the 2000 Cannes Film Festival and was nominated for the Palme d'Or, it has since gone to be regarded as one of the best romance movies to have ever been made.
FINAL SAY: He remembers those vanished years.
4 Chili Peppers