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SPICYWATCH

I Will Try To Fix You

20/8/2023

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No one has it all worked out, and it is important to remember that, especially if you are prone to playing the comparison game. Everyone will try to make their lives look more rosy and put together than they really are, and that's not because we are liars or deceivers, it's because we are living in a world that praises perfection and leaves very little room for error.
People don't want the world to know about the things that they are getting wrong, they want the world to see them striving, not surviving. And honestly, I don't think that there is anything wrong with that, fake it until you make it and focus on the wins, it's not a bad way to be. However, we all really know that no-one has it all together all of the time and that we all have work to do on ourselves from time to time - or my case; most of the time! If you have read my blog posts more than once, you will quickly work out that I am more than happy to let the world know when I stumble and falter and it is often, very often actually. The most important thing to focus on when you do have moments of doubt, self loathing or turmoil is what you need to do in order to lift yourself back up again. 
I recently stumbled across this terrific trouble shooting guide from @anxiousheartguide that outlines where you may need to invest some time and effort based on the area in your life that that you are struggling in. Now like all the advice/ opinion that I post on my blog, none of it is fool proof or guaranteed to fix you or your problems. However, in saying that, it certainly won't hurt you to consider the options and if, like me, you have nothing to lose then you too may find this little tip sheet pretty helpful. Thrash it or trash it? It is totally up to you.

TROUBLE SHOOTING GUIDE TO KNOWING WHAT YOU NEED TO WORK ON:
STRUGGLE: clingy or needy behaviours
WHERE THE WORK IS: independence and self worth

STRUGGLE: overanalysing and worrying
​WHERE THE WORK IS: mindfulness, meditation and journaling

STRUGGLE: overprioritizing other

​WHERE THE WORK IS: self worth and therapy

STRUGGLE: inability to self sooth or regulate

​WHERE THE WORK IS: therapy, EFT, somatics

STRUGGLE: Intolerance of partner availability 

​WHERE THE WORK IS: hobbies, personal interests 

STRUGGLE: losing yourself in a relationship 

​WHERE THE WORK IS: finding and committing to your values, passions 

STRUGGLE: dependency and 
co-dependency
​WHERE THE WORK IS: independence and interdependence 

STRUGGLE: Intolerance to being alone

​WHERE THE WORK IS: solo passion projects and friendships

STRUGGLE: Timidity  and lack of confidence 

​WHERE THE WORK IS: Assertiveness education and classes 

STRUGGLE: 
Oversharing
​WHERE THE WORK IS: sharing self in increasing increments 

STRUGGLE: Fear of criticism or rejection

​WHERE THE WORK IS: Vulnerability and open communication 

STRUGGLE: Need for constant reassurance 

​WHERE THE WORK IS: Trust building and self esteem

STRUGGLE: Moodiness, impulsivity, instability 

​WHERE THE WORK IS: Therapy, meditation and mindfulness

STRUGGLE: Jealousy or insecurity

​WHERE THE WORK IS: vulnerability and open communication 
​
STRUGGLE: stuffing down words, needs or upsets 

​WHERE THE WORK IS: open communication and trust 

STRUGGLE: Dealing with the bullshit patriarchy
WHERE THE WORK IS: Watch the Barbie movie and have a laugh!
(Lol - that one was mine!) 
Picture
BARBIE
Release Date: 2023
Rating: PG
Running Time: 114 mins 

A fantasy comedy directed by Greta Gerwig, who wrote the screenplay with Noah Baumbach; Barbie, which is based around the Mattel fashion dolls called Barbie, hits all the right notes and delivers something that is extremely funny, undeniably woke and fantastically pink in every way. 
Barbie (Margot Robbie) and all the other Barbie versions have the most perfect life in Barbieland. It's all smiles and parties in this matriarchal wonderland where Beach Ken (Ryan Gosling) and all the other Ken's exist only to make the Barbie's happy. However, when Barbie gets pulled into the real world due to an outside influence, she discovers that she has not been the perfect role model in the real world that she thought she was. And Ken, who rides along with her, discovers how the patriarchy works, and soon everything in Barbie's world begins to fall apart. 
This is laugh out loud material from start to end. The costumes, sets and designs are dazzling, the soundtrack is fun and thoughtfully put together and Robbie and Gosling are hilariously great as Barbie and Ken. What I wasn't expecting was for it to be so genuinely moving and poignant about the purpose of being a female role model; there is a genuinely great message being conveyed here that will hopefully not be lost on younger audiences.  And Ken's grappling of the what patriarchy looks like in extreme was also really well fleshed out and explored. 
Not just a pink flash in the pan, Barbie is a movie that people will go back to and play again and again for the laughs and the tears, not unlike the beloved doll herself. 
FINAL SAY: Humans have only one ending. Ideas live forever. 
​4 Chilli Peppers 
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