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SPICYWATCH

Whiter Shade of Pale

5/10/2015

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Thank God, my cat casually sauntered home a day after my last post, like she had just been on a lovely vacation. I however I was like a nutter, running about calling out her name around the neighbourhood and just making a bloody twit of myself for hours on end. I was even perched up in the backyard with a torch in the wee hours like some stalker in the bushes, trying to coax her back. But, at least she did return in the end. 
The holidays have drawn to a close with a fabulous stretch of fantastic weather, allowing me to don my first pair of shorts in what feels like a year. I think that the glare of white from my legs may have scared the nearby nesting magpies and had passing drivers thinking that Nosferatu had finally called it day and decided to just hit the daylight as a means to end it all! But I have to start somewhere, and if that means getting my almost translucently pale pegs out to kick start a summer tan, then so be it.
Everyone frowns on tanning these days, it's like smoking, you know that you're killing yourself when you do it, but you still do it, you just don't admit that you do it. And everyone gives you the look of shame if they catch you doing it, so you have to do these cancer risky things in private where no-one can see you and cast the glaring eye of judgement upon you. Gone are the good old days of sitting in the sun slathered with cooking oil whilst lighting up a fag, seriously you'd be stoned in the street for that these days. 
These days it's all fake tanning and spray tanning, which rarely looks good, in fact it looks downright hideous on a lot of people. When you start to look like you've been rolling in Doritos, then you need to pull back. Orange is not tanned, but so many people seem to miss that all important detail. If you can't get a natural looking tan, then just don't tan. It's just that simple, but no, we are subjected to a parade of Oompa Loompas every summer that just aren't fooling anyone. Embrace the pale if that's what you've been given, it's really not that bad, and trust me when I say that is far better than looking like rouge mandarin all summer long.  
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UNDER THE TUSCAN SUN  
Release Date: 2003 
Rating: M 
Running Time: 113 mins 
If you are excited by the idea of purchasing some ramshackle villa in the middle of nowhere to renovate, then you are going to love this film. Under the Tuscan Sun is speaking a lot more about love than the critics gave it credit for, and I really enjoyed it, I think it was an uplifting and inspirational story that women will really respond to. 
Author Frances Mayes (Diane Ladd) discovers that her husband has been having an affair and a messy divorce ensues. Her best friend (Sandra Oh) encourages her to take a trip to Italy to get away from her woes, and she ends up falling in love with Tuscany and purchases a run down villa to renovate. 
This is a story about growth and renewal, speckled with romantic and platonic interludes that make it both amusing and touching. Told from the view point of a recent divorcee, there is quite a powerful message here about the need to rediscover your identity and overcome your baggage to find the true meaning of self and love. 
FINAL SAY: What is it about love that makes us so stupid?
3 Chili Peppers

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